EK's Star Log

What type of author are you?

Since 1978, I have published 138 novels, 423 novellas, 500+ poems, and 3,000+ short stories all for a single series, that readers have dubbed "The Twighlight Manor series", "The Pink Necromancer series", or "The Quaraun series" depending on which reader you ask, but is actually titled "The Adventures of Quaraun the Insane".

And yes, that number is correct, there ARE over FOUR THOUSAND published stories in the series, and in total more then TEN MILLION copies have been sold, but that number is not as "big" as it sounds, when you consider that 10,000,00/4,000 = 2,500... meaning MOST titles in the series have sold FEWER then just TWO THOUSAND copies.

Yeah.

It is NOT ten million copies of a single title. It's a lot of titles selling only a few hundred copies per title.

Meaning, that while the series in total has sold more copies then many New York Times bestsellers, each title individually has sold so few copies that chances are really high you've never heard of the series at all, especially considering that nearly 27k (twenty seven thousand) of the series most die hard fans/readers live fewer then just FOURTEEN MILES away from me, I've meet MOST of them face to face, and over 80% of the volumes sold were sold locally at festivals like La Kermesse, Moxie Festival, Oxford Fair, Saco Farmer's Market, and Yarmouth Clam festival, with only twenty two of the over four thousand volumes ever been made available online or as ebooks, and those 22 being the only volumes to been issued ISNBs.

If you live outside of a seven mile radius of Old Orchard Beach, Saco, Biddeford, Sanford, or Scarborough, Maine, you likely have never heard of me or my books at all, because I do not sell them any where else.

I am a Yaoi author. I write the Yaoi genre.

And a surprising amount of people show up on my website not knowing what Yaoi is.

Yaoi is a subgenre of the Gay Romance genre.

Yaoi is also a subgenre of the Fantasy Genre.

And Yaoi is part of a genre, you've probably heard only existed in the darkest deep dark corners of the dark web: The Fury Genre.

Yes. I write The Gay Fury Genre.

Specifically I write MPreg Yaoi aka Gay Romance, featuring men who are half animal, and get pregnant.

Welcome to the genre your preacher warned you about.

But as I said, a surprising amount of people arrive at my site, not knowing I'm a Yaoi author, not knowing what Yaoi is, and then a few days later show up in my driveway to yell at me and my family in person, because, hey, that what stalker creeps do, when they find out gay people exit in fiction novels and it gets their panties in a knot.

But... given the reoccurring trend of this happening: let's get one thing out of the way up front, right now:

The fact that I write Yaoi, means that I write about penises... A LOT.

I write about penises so much, that the number one keyword that Google has declared sends more traffic to my site, then any other keyword is: "small penis".

That means the phrase "small penis" appears enough times on my website, for Google to place my website as the number one site it recommend when someone types into Google "small penis".

Why?

I write Yaoi.

And this website has 20k, yes twenty thousand, pages of 138 novels, 423 novellas, 500+ poems, and 3k+ short stories of a single Yaoi series. While it is Yaoi, is very tame Yaoi and so there have only ever been 16 sex scenes written for the series, but just because you don't see the sex happen on the page, doesn't mean they ain't talking about it. And...

...my main character is a hermaphrodite, so he has both a penis and a vagina, he's an Elf/JellyFish hybrid, so he changes gender from male to female or female to male every few years, because that's what jellyfish do.

...his husband is a hypersexual double-dicked Unicorn, who likes to call himseld "the horny unicorny", and spends an inordinate amount of time talking about the fact that he has two penises.

Here's a quick run down of the main characters, there's a bigger run down further down this page and entire sections of this website devoted to more lore and details about them:

Meet The Three Wizards

Because the most common questions for readers to ask is what biological gender is Quaraun born as, and who is having sex with who (given that the series does not contain sex scenes), let’s just answer that question and get it out of the way.

Quaraun aka The Pink Necromancer:

Art by Wendy Christine Allen

Quaraun aka The Pink Necromancer: The F2M transgender Persian Moon Elf main character: The Pink Necromancer, Quaraun The Insane, wearing his pink robes of Moon Goddess worship. F2M for those unaware = Quaraun was biologically born female, but transitioned to live as a male-sort of; this is why there are stories where Quaraun is sometimes pregnant, in spite of being male and using he/him male pronouns.

Quaraun has BOTH a vagina AND a set of penis and balls, as well as having a uterus and ovaries. He at one point had large female breasts, but those were cut up and mutilated by his transphobic father. He was raised as a daughter, but went back and forth between presenting as sometimes male and sometimes female, himself deeply confused as to which he should be as, being intersex, he was therefore neither male nor female.

Quaraun is shown throughout the series with both male and female lovers, and he has both given birth to children as well as fathered children in others.

Quaraun is a Necromancer by the actual dictionary definition of the word, meaning he is a psychic medium who sees and hears ghosts, and uses tarot, spirit boards, and seances to communicate with the dead. By profession he is a silk weaver/tailor/silk merchant. Quaraun is an Elder God JellyFish who takes the form of an Elf to blend in with society. His 12 foot long hair is made out of venomous, stinging jellyfish tentacles. Quaraun is BoomFuzzy's apprentice and regarded as the world's most powerful still living wizard. Quaraun's exact age is unknown, but he is somewhere around 750 years old. In his SunTa form he is twelve thousand years old. The Scared Pink JellyFish that lives in him, is stated to being over two million years old.

Quaraun is a transman who wears boob bindings, but also has had a forced against his will double mastectomy as a form of punishment, in his youth which heavily contributed to his becoming transgender transitioning to become a man.

Quaraun was the youngest child of a deranged Seelie Court Elf king who had all daughters and wanted a son.

It is said throughout the series that Quaraun was twins who fused into one body in the womb, as his hermaphrodite body is not the normal state of being for Elves. His father was an evil Elf whom murdered his mother and violently abused Quaraun throughout his youth. As a result of these abuses, Quaraun reached adulthood with his body badly mutilated, most notably that his female breasts are slashed to the point of resembling a botched mastectomy, while his penis is split in two lengthwise, the split being "repaired" by the use of dozens of gold ring piercings. Because of these injuries Quaraun introduces himself to strangers as "a eunuch ", when asked if he is male or female, because he is both and neither.

Quaraun is a frail, flighty, rabbity, easily frightened, easily flustered, easily frustrated, and easily annoyed, pure blooded Moon Elf. He tries to maintain dignity and prim, pernickety, proper grammar, refuses to use contractions, and is highly prone to using big, outdated words because he finds comfort in saying them outloud. Quaraun uses Flowery Language and big words. Quaraun knows very many big words and he is not afraid to use them. 

Quaraun and BoomFuzzy are a deeply devoted, madly in love, endlessly obsessed with each other elderly married couple, whom have been together for centuries. They are constantly hugging and kissing, holding hands, touching, cuddling. They kiss in public. They are all over each other. Humans find their public displays of affection scandalous.

Quaraun hates Humans. BoomFuzzy also hates Humans. Faeries and Elves protect nature. Humans are the enemy because Humans destroy nature. BoomFuzzy Is the King of The UnSeelie Court. These malevolent tricksters take feral delight in deadly pranks. Quaraun and BoomFuzzy are the most evil super villains the world has ever known, so say the Humans. But BoomFuzzy and Quaraun see the Humans as evil and view themselves as the heroes saving nature from the Humans.

Quaraun was born intersex, having both male and female genitals, and is able to both father children in others and give birth to children himself. Quaraun was also born with several severe mental disorders, as well as generally being presumed to have low-functioning autism.

As a teenager, Quaraun was identifying as a female and was one of the favourite princesses of the Elf's royal court.

When Quaraun attracted the romantic attention of the UnSeelie Court Faerie King, her father, infuriated, cut off her breasts and mutilated her vagina, in a brutal attempt to force his intersex child to become his son. When Quaraun tried to fight back to defend himself, his father crushed his hands in the grinding wheel of a millstone, which is why Quaraun now has metal prosthetic hands.

Quaraun left The Seelie Court, joined forces with the UnSeelie Court, and continued wearing the royal pink gowns of a Seelie Elven princess, but took to binding his mutilated breasts, using male pronouns and identify as a male, and went on to marry the UnSeelie Court Faerie King becoming his court mage.

This caused further gender identity issues, as the UnSeelie King was himself a gay male, married to another male, and upon marrying Quaraun, thought Quaraun to be biologically male.

It is stated in the novels that for the first thirty years of their marriage BoomFuzzy refused to have sex with Quaraun, because Quaraun biologically looked more female, having a “too small” of a penis, and appearing more biologically female.

The first three decades of Quaraun’s marriage to BoomFuzzy were rocky due to BoomFuzzy’s being a gay man and Quaraun being a transman, and BoomFuzzy’s refusal to have sex with anyone possessing a vagina.

All of that information can be found in the novels.

Many of the stories in this collection are elderly Quaraun, now many centuries later, reflecting on this event from his youth.

By the time of the current era in the series timeline, BoomFuzzy has become accepting of Quaraun’s hermaphrodite body, with the two now sharing a sexually active relationship, though it is still stated that they only have anal sex as BoomFuzzy has a deep aversion to vaginas.

Quaraun, BoomFuzzy, and GhoulSpawn all three sleep in the same bed together, and all of them are uncut/not circumscribed (yes, readers keep asking me that one too.) There is no “top/bottom” dynamics, as it’s all just whomever wants to have sex does, however they want, and more often then not it’s three-way with Quaraun bottom to both BoomFuzzy and GhoulSpawn at the same time.

Stories about Quaraun are usually set in the era between him being 750 to 800 years old, as this was the time period GhoulSpawn lived with him. GhoulSpawn only lived with Quaraun for a space of around thirty years. This is the era when Quaraun was still identifying as male, but was beginning to dress far more female, due to his growing obsession with Moon Goddess worship. This era was the early stages of his religious tyranny which would lead to his later decent into insanity and eventually crowning himself as The Grand High Emperor of The Triple Planets and renaming himself SunTa – God of the Sun.

There you go. Now you all don’t have to ask anymore.

King Gwallmaiic aka BoomFuzzy the Unicorn:

King Gwallmaiic aka BoomFuzzy the Unicorn: Quaraun's husband, BoomFuzzy aka King Gwallmaiic, a Scottish Phooka, who is King of The UnSeelie Court.

Even though Quaraun is the main character, BoomFuzzy is the character who gets the most page time, and some readers have said it feels more like BoomFuzzy is the main character.

This is because the series is written in 3rd person limited point of view, from Quaraun's perspective.

What this ,means is the reader ONLY sees and hears what Quaraun sees and hears.

Unlike 3rd omni point of view, where the reader sees and hears everything going on in the room, in the city, in the world, even gets told world history... in 3rd limited, readers only see the events happening within a few feet of the main character and ONLY IF the main character happens to notice them. When it comes to lore and world history and worldbuilding, the reader only knows information the main character knows.

In the Quaraun series, Quaraun is the 3rd limited point of view the reader gets, and Quaraun is deeply, madly, obsessively in love with and devoted to his beloved husband BoomFuzzy. And the two of them have a very "joined at the hip" type of relationship where one is rarely more then a few feet away from the other. They do everything together. And so, yes, this does put BoomFuzzy front and centre and nearly main character himself, in most stories, as it is BoomFuzzy that Quaraun is seeing and hearing most of the time.

Because main character Quaraun's thoughts and focus are always on BoomFuzzy, BoomFuzzy is in fact the character readers are going to see on the page and be interacting with most of all, and for many readers who are going to be more familiar with the more common 3rd omni style of writing, it is going to seem to them like BoomFuzzy and not Quaraun is the main character.

BoomFuzzy is a Faerie Chef who became King of first The UnSeelie Court, later King of the Realm of Fae, went on to become King of Scotland, next became King of Persia, then King of Canada, and next King of America, and with in the space of around only a decade, quickly became King of the Planet, a position he has held for two thousand years, and is still holding at the time of the series era.

King Gwallmaiic, aka BoomFuzzy, is a Master Chef owner of a restaurant empire, who for centuries was quite content to cook and bake and pose for magazine shoots. He owned dozens of resturtuants, and had a TV cooking show, and was for many years the rockstar of celebrity chefs. And then the apocalypse happened, chaos decended on the planet, world governments colapsed, and the dead were crawling up out of graves. Every one from Zombie Jesus to Zombie Hitler now roam the planet in search of brains, and all political boundaries everywhere simply disappeared as few in government survived and those that did fleed.

When shit hit the fan, the end result was twenty one billion zombies and only seven million living worldwide. Bandits, gangs, mobs, and tribe rule took over what was left of society, and half crazed Human gangs simply took to attacking any group they found. BoomFuzzy's family was butched early on in the start of the mob rule days, and it made him mean, and he not only fought back, he gathered up other Faeries and built the psychopunk steampunk army known as The UnSeelie Court, crowning himself their king, BoomFuzzy and his followers became the most feared gang on the planet, and marched their way across the planet taking over what was left of each government until he had reached the point of being "King of the World".

Along the way he added Moon Elf Quaraun as his royal court mage. Quaraun, not yet a necromancer, uncovered the mutiny plot by BoomFuzzy's husband and second in command Gibedon the Great, and went on the kill Gibedon, before Gibedon could kill the king. But not before Gibedon had near mortally wounded BoomFuzzy. Heartbroken by Gibedon's betrayal BoomFuzzy, and not realizing Quaraun was in love with him, refused medical attention for his wounds and commit suicide the first time Quaraun left him alone.

Devastated by BoomFuzzy's death and horrified by the world's reaction of making holidays to celebrate his defeat, Quaraun became a necromancer, and brought BoomFuzzy back as a Lich.

The Lich spells has to constantly renewed otherwise the Lich devolves into a mindless monster with no memories, and is nothing more then a very overpowered zombie. BoomFuzzy, being a Frost Lich, is a zombie, whose flesh does not rot and who can control the weather, summoning blizzards, and killing people with his Kiss of Death that sucks the warmth out of their body. Wherever BoomFuzzy is, winter follows, as do millions of zombies. Being a Lich he has psionic abilities to control the zombie herds moving them at will, like huge armies, across villages and settlements. With twenty one billion undead at him command, Lich King Gwallmattic, Elf Eater of Pepper Valley, Lich Lord of Fire Mountain, aka BoomFuzzy the Lich Unicorn, went on to become the most feared and most unstoppable rule Earth had ever known.

And then, he simply went back to being a Master Chef, running his restaurants, working out of his food truck, and being the kind, loving, devoted husband to Quaraun and their children, while leaving his Kelpie guards and Leprechaun generals to rule in his stead. While he remains the figurehead of the kingdom of Earth, the one leader the people see, he in fact has not run the government for three hundred years, at the point of which readers see him in the series.

What readers encounter instead is the very slice of life domestic life of an evil warrior king, who has a family to protect, and spends most of his days helping Quaraun run the lighthouse they live in.

The Black Tower Lighthouse is their home, when they are at home. The BioDome behind the lighthouse is where The 400 families of The UnSeelie Court live. When they travel they do so in The Blue Monkey a huge 5 deck tramp steamer paddlewheel river boat, which had been a Disney cruise ship prior to the apocalypse and is big enough to house all 400 families of The UnSeelie Court, serving estentally as a floating village. When they dock The Blue Monkey and travel inland, Quaraun, BoomFuzzy, and GhoulSpawn travel in a vardo, that is towed by a pair of undead cyber moose, while sentient/sapient AI Toobe, "self"drives the food truck behind them, and 400 families of The UnSeelie Court follow along in a huge motley caravan of cars, trucks, covered wagons, and RVs. They set up tent camps along the road at night.

The lighthouse under attack from giant undead crustaceans.	The Blue Monkey in Saco Bay
The Vardo	Inside the Vardo
BoomFuzzy's food truck, a 1968 robin egg blue Volkswagen 23 window Kombi Bus	Quaraun's pink silk tent

And for all of it, BoomFuzzy is always seen as the one in command, taking control, giving the orders, and overall keeping The UnSeelie Court in check and in line. While he no longer first hand rules the world and has set up his followers to do so instead, BoomFuzzy is still first hand in control of The UnSeelie Court itself.

While known for his wild, crazy antics, BoomFuzzy is also the eye of the storm, holding everything together, becoming the the centre of everything. Story plots revolve completly around him, and readers see him trying to juggle ruling the world, running his restaurant business, keeping the zombies at bay, maintaining repairs of the lighthouse, leading teams to scavenge for supplies in the city ruins, and raising a family, all while dealing with Quaraun's endless paranoias, psychotic meltdowns, and germaphobic fits of hysteria.

BoomFuzzy is perhaps the most multi faceted character of the series, as readers see almost every aspects of all sides of his life.

BoomFuzzy is a "classic fantasy type" Necromancer who uses sorcery to raise the dead. Being a Faerie he is also an illusionist and master of trickster magic. By profession, he is a Master Chef, owning the global monopoly on restaurants, taverns, pubs, and food trucks. Until his death, BoomFuzzy was regarded as the world's most powerful wizard. He is now a Lich. BoomFuzzy is also half-Human. His mother was a Mongolian/Chinese Human, which is why he wears distinctively Asian outfits, along with a great kilt worn as a cape.

BoomFuzzy gleefully plots attacks on settlements. Quaraun, angry at the thought of Humans, agrees with BoomFuzzy’s evil nefarious plots.

BoomFuzzy is a gritty, feisty, feral Scottish Phooka—a ruthless warlord known as King Gwallmaiic, Elf Eater of Pepper Valley, Lich Lord of Fire Mountain. His speech is raw, crass, and unfiltered, drenched in cockney street slang and a rough Scots dialect. He must always use double negatives, vulgar expressions, and colorful curses that capture his brutal, no-nonsense nature. He calls people “numpty” and uses “bahookie” often.

BoomFuzzy dismisses any fancy scientific or academic jibber jabber, believing that strength and fear—rather than numbers or polite discourse—are what build a kingdom. He speaks with the unrefined swagger of a battle-hardened vagabond king who rules by muscle and menace, not by education or courtesy. Every line of his dialogue should reek of savage authority and unyielding ferocity, emphasizing that he is the living, breathing embodiment of raw power in a wild, blood-thirsty world.

You know all those fancy pants old fashioned words Quaraun likes using? BoomFuzzy likes using them too, but deliberately goes out of his way to use them incorrectly or as curse words, just to annoy Quaraun. BoomFuzzy thinks those words are funny and often finds ways to make them sound crude or lewd, he especially likes words that sound like bum or butt or ass. For example BoomFuzzy might say he's “gonna take a Pish-posh” instead of “take a piss”, or say “sits on his Bumbershoot” instead of “sits on his bum”.

He swears often, fuck, fucked, and fucking are used liberally. He often adds crude sputtered injectioned phrases like “fucking rat bastards” or “bastardly dipshits” or “fucking dimwits” (example: “Humans over in the next village, fucking rat bastards, are planning…”).

BoomFuzzy often drops articles and misused pronouns (example: “me food truck” or “you meal be ready soon” or “going down beach” (instead of “going down to the beach”).

Not because he doesn't know them, but rather because he knows dropping them annoys the shit out of Quaraun. when needs be, BoomFuzzy can and does talk just fine, but making fun of white people by speaking over the top broken English, to deliberately go out of his way to prove a point about white people treating Black people like shit, then turn around and shock them by switching to prim perfect grammar, is a thing BoomFuzzy does a lot.

BoomFuzzy likes to scream out random Onomatopoeic words, for example, he Often runs up behind people and screams “BOOM!” , then turns into a tiny fuzzy purple Shetland pony with a gleaming silver horn, then runs away laughing, which is the reason people nicknamed him “BoomFuzzy”. He also says things like: “Shut ya gob!” Or “Quit ya caterwauling!” BoomFuzzy has silver eyes caused by ocular albinism. But BoomFuzzy is a Black Man. He is legally blind but can see some, with the help of his giant steampunk, cybertech goggles. BoomFuzzy is absolute chaos on a stick. BoomFuzzy is prone to Circumlocution, using the long way around a sentence. BoomFuzzy likes these words: Bahookie, Eejit, Bollocks, Dodgy, Nincompoop, Collywobbles, Malarkey, Comeuppance, Skullduggery, Kerfuffle, Flummoxed, Thingamajig, Tomfoolery, Shenanigans, Hoodwink, Blethering, Hullabaloo, Curmudgeon, Whippersnapper, Bamboozled, Jibber Jabber, A Murder of Crows, EdgeLord, Lollygag, Fuddy-duddy, Ragamuffin, Lackadaisy, Rapscallion, Rotty, Balderdash, Tittynope, Cockamamie, Claptrap, Catawampus, Gobsmacked, Hornswoggle, Discombobulated,

Known as BoomFuzzy the Unicorn, he often takes the form of a purple Unicorn. BoomFuzzy's exact age is unknown, though he was well over two thousand years old at the time of his death, and Quaraun resurrected him as a Lich around 500+ years ago, making him close to 3,000 years old. In his BlackBird form he is fifteen thousand years old.

Since it's easier to just show you, here's a sample of how he talks:

BoomFuzzy’s Unicorn Lich form

Glinta aka GhoulSpawn the Crazed

Glinta aka GhoulSpawn the Crazed: Their on again-off again mad scientist golden fleeced Sheep Demon lover: GhoulSpawn with his 1974 AMC Gremlin time machine. GhoulSpawn was born on a boiling, fire planet, but as a small child was summoned to 1959 Earth by Humans with a Ouija board. He lived among Humans, getting a PhDs in Quantum Physic and Astrophysics, invented time travel, built a time machine, and then in 1978, fell through a portal, and is now trapped in 40th century Maine. Being a Demon from literal Hell, he has natural elemental abilities with fire and can summon hell creatures. He is Quaraun's apprentice, and feared by Humans to be on a fast track to becoming more powerful than either BoomFuzzy or Quaraun. Due to his messing around with time travel, there are 5 different versions of him which appear throughout the series, each from different dimensions and alternate time lines, each one uses a different name (Glinta, GhoulSpawn, Gremlin, Checka, ZooLock - while GhoulSpawn is the one seen most often, Gremlin is in fact the correct original one). GhoulSpawn is very young, not yet 50 years old. The Gremlin version of him is around 500 years old, while the Checka version of him is thirteen thousand years old, and the ZooLock version of him is stated to be "old as time".

GhoulSpawn is a laid-back, chill American hippy with the unmistakable vibe of Shaggy from Scooby-Doo. A former draft dodger who amassed an endless string of PhDs in physics during the '50s, '60s, and '70s, he now speaks with an easygoing, surfer-dude cadence. His language should be casual and relaxed, sometimes includes phrases like “yo, dude,” “man,” “like, totally,” and “chill now” but don't over do it, keep it subtle. Due to his academic background, he embraces heavy use of quantum physics jargon, gets side tracked and goes off on tangents peppered with scientific facts, scientific equations, physics figures, dry logic, but blended with a conversational, somewhat offbeat style that makes complex ideas seem cool and accessible.

he’s the calm in the chaos, ready to “take a drip” or “catch some waves” while calling things “groovy” and “jive” or saying “fuzz” when he means “police” and using “stoner slang” and mixes it with strict adherence to laws of physics and scientific facts guide him. His tone should remain unfussy, breezy, mad scientist, and thoroughly modern, a far cry from pretentious academia, capturing the spirit of a true free-spirited hippy navigating a wild, post-apocalyptic realm. GhoulSpawn has golden flecked bright yellow pleco eyes with black scalar.

GhoulSpawn loves Quaraun, but is very shy about it. GhoulSpawn admires BoomFuzzy but is also scared of him. GhoulSpawn sleeps in the same bed with Quaraun and BoomFuzzy. They are each lovers to the other two.

GhoulSpawn is bisexual and sexually active with both Quaraun and BoomFuzzy, and is usually accepted as the biological father of most, of Quaraun’s pregnancies, given BoomFuzzy’s general avoidance of vaginas in general. However GhoulSpawn has a deep dislike for children, whereas BoomFuzzy loves children and is very good with children, resulting in most of Quaraun’s children referring to BoomFuzzy as their father, and BoomFuzzy accepting and referring to the children as his, even though he knows GhoulSpawn to be the biological father.

All three of them are evil super villians.

Quaraun is a sly, sneaky, snake oil charlatan, capable of selling his overpriced wares to anyone.

BoomFuzzy is a slippery tongued master of deception, illusions, and trickery who makes a scene of giving away free food creating an effective distraction. BoomFuzzy bounces around like a Circus ringmaster turned trickster king, wearing a top hat and bombastically calling out to the passers by.

GhoulSpawn, with is long green Fagin coat full of bag of holding pockets, is an expert sneak thief and pickpocket who never gets caught, while BoomFuzzy creates distracts with free food, drawing in crowds of hungry survivors, GhoulSpawn slips through the crowd pocketing anything and everything, including things Quaraun just sold, allowing Quaraun to sell them all over again.

Together the 3 of them are very good at robbing Humans of nearly everything and then leaving before the Humans realize they've been hoodwinked and swindled.

Quaraun is most certainly NOT an evil genius; evil yes, but genius, no; Quaraun is very stupid, in fact he's the epitome of the "too stupid to live" trope meets "the ditzy blond" trope, but he's full blown evil, just not smart enough to pull off any of the evil plots he hatches. Quaraun comes up with all sorts of evil plots, he just ain't got the smarts to pull any of them off.

BoomFuzzy is super intelligent, but is the type that doesn't want to be intelligent, because he wants to be normal, so he goes overboard on being the class clown trope to try to hide that fact that he has brain cells miles smarter then most everyone else; and he's full caos when it comes to switching sides between evil one minute helpful the next.

BoomFuzzy does have the smarts needed to pull of Quaraun's evil plots, but he's too busy tying Quaraun's twelve foot long hair to the staircase, or switching Quaraun's snuff out for sneezing powder, to have time to work on evil plots.

GhoulSpawn on the other hand IS a mega mind super genius, but he's too mild and meek to be evil (yet), he's probably the smartest megamind super brain in the universe, but he has no ambition at all, he's just plain lazy; he's a 1970s groovy chill hippy who's rather sit on the grass, smoking the grass, reading comics to his pet sheep, eat pizza, and tinker on his little appliance gadget inventions, then actually use his mega braincells for hatching evil plots, but he's also the eye twitchy one tick away from going megalomaniac on the entire planet, if only the thought of doing so didn't scare him shitless.

Noodle Beach is the primary location. Black Tower lighthouse is on the cliffs of MoonSnail Cove, on Noodle Beach. The Forest of No Return is behind the lighthouse. Silent Moor is the marsh to the side of the lighthouse. The Blue Monkey is the river boat. The pink silk tent is used when travelling. They travel to survivors settlements which are hundreds of miles between and extremely isolated, to barter for supplies.

It's three god-level, planet destroying, alien invader Space Elf, Space Faerie, Space Demon megalomaniac super villain bumbling wizards, and their ship's crew (The UnSeelie Court) with big global domination plans, whom have invaded 40th century Earth, settled in a lighthouse in Maine, started a zombie apocalypse, are hellbent on destroying all Humans and taking over the planet, but are never getting anything done because they are too busy throwing temper tantrums, having hissy fits, and flinging food, sea slugs, insults, and sexual tension at each other, to ever get around to destroying the planet.

This perhaps says it best:

BUT... it's also Cozy Fantasy, a genre known for the fact that it contains ZERO sex scenes, ZERO violence, and the bulk of the genre revolves around couples drinking tea, running restaurants, and over all, not doing one single damned thing at all. Which is why is is so hilarious when churches around York County, Maine call me an Erotica author, call my books Erotica, or like how in February 2016 when The Old Orchard Beach Town Hall issued a court order declaring my books had to have a "Rated M21+" label put on them due to "sex and violence and featuring gay couples living in the Town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine" (it ended up in Superior Court by October 2016, and there, the Judge threw out the Town Hall's "Too Gay For The Family Friendly Town of Old Orchard Beach" court case on grounds of "a government institution can not impede freedom of speech or ban books".

So for a period of 9 months in 2016 all my books were hilariously sold with a "Rated M21+" label on the covers, and people had to show ID to prove they were over the age of 21 to buy my books in the State of Maine... the label stated on it "due to graphic sex and extreme violence and featuring gay couples living in the Town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine". ...even though NONE of my books contained sex, graphic or otherwise, and none of them contained violence.

In 2017 Old Orchard Beach, Maine became Noodle Beach, Maine in the series and the town hall was no longer able to complain about gay couples living in Old Orchard Beach, of course this also lead to the discovery that Old Orchard Beach had a town ordinance forbidden gay couples from owning homes, property, or businesses in Old Orchard Beach, leading to the Gay Pride protests that arrived afterwards, and today, that ordinance has been overturned and there are over a dozen gay couple owned businesses right on Main Street, in front of The Old Orchard Beach Town Hall.

Gay haters are weird.

In any case, the fact that there are no sex scenes in my books is WHY I get so many readers asking me: "Do these three guys have sex with each other, or are they just platonic friends living together?"

No. They are not platonic friends.

Quaraun and BoomFuzzy are a married couple and GhoulSpawn is their shared live-in lover. Each of the three is sexual active with the other two, and all three of them sleep in a single bed together.

Sooooooo... that's the kind of stuff I write and that's the kind of website this is.

Important:

Fraudulent sites are impersonating Wendy Christine Allen.

• The ONLY official website for Wendy Christine Allen is Space Dock 13 (www.eelkat.com)

Fraudulent social media accounts, particularly on Reddit and FaceBook are impersonating Wendy Christine Allen.

• The ONLY official social media accounts for Wendy Christine Allen are listed in the footer here at Space Dock 13 (www.eelkat.com)

Any websites and accounts you find online that are NOT on this list are NOT Wendy Christine Allen

Also in recent weeks (November 2025 and December 2025), multiple people have contacted me asking variations of the question: "What ever happened to the bullying awareness website you run, I can't find it anywhere?"

Uhm...???... the what?

This website that you are reading right now is the ONLY website I've ever had.

I have NEVER had another website, bullying awareness or otherwise.

So, I have no clue what is this "bullying awareness" website is that you think I run, but, whatever it is, it ain't me.

I don't know if people are mixing me up with someone else, or if someone has made some sort of site and are pretending to be me, but, this site you are on right now, eelkat.com, was started in 1996 and it is the only website I've ever had. It has always been an author homepage, it as always been the archive for my short stories and novels, and it has never been anything else. 

It has been hosted on GeoCities, Angel Fire, TriPod, FreeWebs, and WordPress and other hosts over the decades, and originally it was:

geocities.com/TheSpaceDock13Network

later AngelFire.com/TheSpaceDock13Network

and TriPod.com/TheSpaceDock13Network

and FreeWebs.com/TheSpaceDock13Network

No matter what service hosted it is was ALWAYS TheSpaceDock13Network

In 2013 I bought the url eelkat.com (it was shorter and easier for people to remember then TheSpaceDock13Network.com) and it has had the eelkat.com url ever since.

SpaceDock13 is the name of the lighthouse the main character of my novels lives in. The site was called SpaceDock13 because it housed the stories about said main character. In fact, the site is STILL called Space Dock 13, that has never changed.

So, I don't know what this "bullying awareness" website it is that several people are looking for and thought was run by me, but, it wasn't my site and I don't know what it was.

Additionally:

If you are one of (as of December 2025, the now more than ten thousand) daily visitors, who arrive here daily in search of SEO advice, I made this page for you:

My response to the alarming spike in traffic to my "SEO" pages. aka I am getting Weird Spike In Google Traffic For SEO & Content Writing & Marketing keywords and search terms even though this is a Yaoi and Gay Romance website that has absolutely nothing to do with SEO or Content Writing or Content Marketing What the fuck?

An update to info about this woman imperonating me (added January 26, 2026)

If you were bedridden for 9 years, would your friends and family remember you when you returned to walking again?

Mine didn't, in fact they forgot me so hard that an impersonator took my place in their lives for 9 years. How does this happen?

 I had a wild experience today, and it has made me question: how fast do YOU forget people you know? Like details about them? I ask because, this was someone who knows me offline, face to face, local friend, who hasn't seen me in about a year, but knows me, and knows my car... specifically knows my cars... a 1992 Volvo, that is fully mural painted, with a giant pink jellyfish on the hood, a purple unicorn on one side, a blue merman and a seraphum angle on the other side, and a purple dragon on the back. Also, has a huge four foot long wheelchair carrier on the back, with my website url painted in yellow daisies. This is the same car that for over a decade had 2.5 million marbles glued to it.

I build art cars. I have NEVER not once in 50 years ever owned a car that was NOT an art car. Some of my cars are very, very, very, very famous *cough-TheRealChristineakaTheWorld'sMostHauntedCar-madefamousbyStephenKing-akaI'mtheREALGypsywitchfromThinner-cough*. My motorhome glows in the dark, yes, it's painted with blacklight neon pink and neon lime green metal flake bass boat paint.

I'm kind of a little bit famous, not only for my cars, but also for being one of the few authors on the planet to have sold over ten million copies of my books, most of which have pictures of my cars instead of pictures of me the author in the author bio, because my cars are more famous then I am.

I am also known for my cloths, and more recently my wheelchair, because I still wear the traditional garb of my people, we are Gypsies, and that means I wear what is often mistaken for Muslim/hyjabi because I wear head scarfs, long veils, long kaftan, long kimono-like robes, great kilts, and huge ruahna shawls, most of which are hand woven in bright colours and thick embroidery, sequins, and beadwork that would make Liberace proud.

I have never dressed "normal" (by American standards) and I've never had a normal car, and one of my cars is so famous it has 30million fans, and I've had to keep it in storage for over twenty years, because it's so famous I can't take it out without being mobbed by it's fans: THOUSANDS of them.

The Volvo is not quite as famous as the Dodge, but it's almost. And it too is to the point where, I can't even park it in my driveway because my driveway faces the main road, and I have to daily deal with dozens of tourists in my driveway taking pictures of themselves with my car if I leave it in the driveway. I have to park it on a side street around the back, so that it can not be seen from the main road.

And that, insaly famous car, is the car in question here. I've owned the Volvo since 2006, it is my daily driver, BUT, ever since buying it, it has ALWAYS had issues with cold weather. It is after all an antique car, nearly forty years old, that I am using as my daily driver. And so, because I actually care about keeping my cars running, and don't buy a new car every year like Americans do, that means I also, keep my car off the road, once deep winter arrives.

This year, deep winter arrived, mid December, and so two weeks before Christmas, as I have done every year since 2006, I packed up my car and put it in storage for the winter. I'll take it out of storage when winter shows signs of leaving, which given how it is going so far this year, means I likely will not be using my car until mid March or later.

So, this person, who knows me, and knows my car... had comments to say today about "my" car. The specifics of the comments are not important. What was important was "my" car was upsetting them a great deal and they informed me of this, as they had just seen “my” car minutes prior.

Needless to say this confused me greatly, because my car has been in a storage unit for a little over two months now and is still there.

I told them this. 

They were now equally as confused as I was.

Then they explained which car they were talking about.

It was just a plain, ordinary, normal, looks like the millions of other cars in America that look just like it average car.

That's not your car?

Nope.

Why would it be?

I'm KNOWN for a neon orange car, a glow in the dark green and pink blacklight car, and a muralled and rhinestone'd car... I'm known for a wardrobe that rivals Liberaces in both colour and rhinestones... more recently I'm also known for a neon yellow and orange, glow in the dark wheelchair, I'm known for book covers in the guadeiest shades of eye blinding pink and purple...

I'm legally blind since birth, I can not see shades of red, brown, grey, or black, I can only see neon shades of pink, orange, yellow, and teal blue... so EVERYTHING I do, my book covers, my clothes, my wheelchair, and my cars are always ONLY in those colours because I can't see other colours... why would you think, a car that was NOT neon pink, day glow orange, or glow in the dark lime green, was mine?

But the thing is... this is someone who knows me personally, offline, someone who I don't think is aware I'm famous (because most locals don't, I like my privacy), but, they ARE someone who in the summer when my car is not in storage sees my car almost every single day... so they KNOW the antique Volvo with the wild neon paint job that looks like it drove out of the 1960s, is my car. They also know I'm in a wheelchair and can't go out of the house without the wheelchair so can't go in ANYONE'S car unless their car is equipped with wheelchair transportability.

The car in question, not only a fairly newish aged car of common drab colour, also does not have a wheelchair carrier, so, that too should have been obvious.

But...

Here's the thing...

So, it turns out, because this person has not seen me in over a year, they forgot I was in a wheelchair and they forgot my car is a work of psychedelic art on wheels, and ... the car they were complaining about was parked in front of my apartment, you know, in a city that has 27k on street parked cars, so no body parked on the street is parked in front of their own house... so they just assumed it was my car.

But... back to the question at the start... 

When you are dealing with common, average, same old same old carbon copy cars that all look alike, or when you are dealing with Americans who own such cars.... I can understand how you forget them, because, they are arguably forgettable. Out of the factory they all look exactly the same to millions of other cars.

But, when you have a car like mine... how do you forget that? Or, when someone has been using a wheelchair for 13 years, over a decade now, how do you forget that?

I'm just left to wonder... obviously there is an issue of memory loss here... but... it seemed like an odd bit of memory exchange.

And it got me to thinking, that this is not the first time such as thing has happened (first time with this person), it actually has been happening quite a lot since 2021.

See, I became crippled in 2013 and was bedridden from 2013 to 2021... so, I vanished completely 100% from church, college, work, and online/social media/my blogs/etc. Gone without a trace, because I was paralyzed, severed spine, paralyzed arms and legs, and it took from 2013 to 2021 to relearn to use my fingers, hands, arms, and legs.... May 2021, I went outside for the first time in 9 years... that was when you started to see me doing my daily "walk around the block" using my wheelchair as a walker, pushing it and leaning on it for support, to try to relearn to walk. The first day it took me over 2 hours to reach the West Cutts Street stop signs, a distance of about 200 feet. Now in 2026 I am able to walk to the dirt road beside the tracks and back in about an hour and a half (a distance of about 750 yards).

In my daily walking i encounter a LOT of people who knew me BEFORE 2013, who are stunned, shocked, and upset to learn I was paralyzed and no one told them... worse... they usually think it must be recent, happened a few weeks ago.... why, because they tell me of a woman with a black car, sometimes they call it a Cadillac, other times a Lincoln, other times a Buick, but always a big fairy new black sedan... whom they THOUGHT was me, in fact, they stopped to talk with her... and one pointed out... "wait, I just remembered, you were born with low functioning Autism, like RainMan, you are almost mute, you can't talk right, she's talks fine; how did I mistake her for you? I never noticed she wasn't you until I just see you now!" 

Nearly a dozen different people have told me of this woman, they say she goes by "EelKat" even tells them to call her "EelKat". EelKat is the name of a fictional talking black cat from my novels. I am not EelKat, I have never called myself EelKat. But this woman, who has been impersonating me locally, had MULTIPLE DOZEN locals convinced she was me.

She also convinced people that I believed my WW2 veteran homeless friend to be an "amphibious alien" named Etiole. A homeless transman in his 90s, who was a prisoner of war during WW2, survived a concentration camp, and lives with massive PTSD, unable to be around people, and has horrible burns all over his body disfiguring him. He was a fighter piolet from France, back then still living as a cis-female. He is not an alien, his name is not Etiole, I've never called him an alien, I don't call him Etiole... and yet, this black haired woman has not only convinced dozens of locals, but spread the rumour so far and wide online,, that I found out about it in September 2023 when Coast To Coast AM Radio showed up in my driveway asking to interview me about being an alien abductee! I've never been abducted by aliens, my friend is not an alien, heck, I don't even believe in aliens or any of that other conspiracy theory junk!

My best friend is a World war Two fighter pilot, and you’ve all known that, I’ve been taken care of him since 1978! When that impersonator showed up calling him an alien, that should have been your first red flag that she WAS NOT ME!

And, these local people, since 2021, and my return both to the internet and going outside, after 9 years not online and 9 years bedridden... these local people are all telling me the same thing: "OMG! I thought she was you! I forgot you never wear pants! I forgot your always wear a head scarf! I forgot you wear glasses! (she does not) I forgot you build/drove art cars! I forgot..." It's an endless list of "I forgot this about you..."

And it's not just random locals..... it's my aunts, my uncles, my cousins, people I went to college with for 3 years, people I went to church with for forty years... these are people who knew me up close and personal, people I went to movies with, people I interacted with offline daily for years... 

• --they FORGOT I was mute and thought nothing of suddenly "me" showing up and talking to them?

I’ve only recently just started learning how to talk because I had surgery on my jaw… turns out my jaw bone has been fused shut since infancy and jaw replacement surgery fixed my mutness… but five decades of no vocal chord use my voice is barely above a whisper and ‌always will be, plus I slur words really bad because five decades of writing notes to “speak” in person, means I have no practice with sounding out words, I only know how to write them… how did you not notice this woman SPOKE when I WRITE everything on a notepad for five decades because I was born mute!!!!

• --they FORGOT I was legally blind and thought nothing of suddenly "me" showing up and seeing them and not wearing glasses?

Here's one...

• --they FORGOT I am not white, I am an INDIGENOUS race, a Native American & Persian Gypsy and thought nothing of suddenly "me" showing up SUDDENLY A WHITE PERSON?

--they FORGOT I was Kickapoo Native American, Persian Gypsy, and Mongolian/Asian mix race and thought nothing of suddenly "me" showing up WHITE? Yeah, I’m STILL got my flat Asian face, lidded Asian eyes, huge Native American nose and brown Native American skin, none of my skin colour, eye shape, or facial bone structure changed,... how did you mistake a white person for me? WTH?

HOW does that happen?

• Forget that she showed up gibbering madness about aliens… she wasn’t even the same RACE or SKIN COLOUR as me! And THAT didn’t tell you that she was not me?

HOW does that happen?

How do you forget I'm not white?

People see what they WANT to see... and I never realized how MUCH people see what they WANT to see instead of what is ACTUALLY IN FRONT OF THEM.

The strangest one was a woman who came running up to me yelling

"Hey, eelKat, wait up!" and when I turned around to facwe her she stopped shot and stode there "wait, your not... your... wait... your you... but... wait... so... who ... but... I though... wait... so ...wh.o.. wait... who...who have I been talking to all this time?"

She then told me that soon as she saw me it jolted her memory and reminded her that I was in fact me; she then explained that for the past ten years she has been going shopping, to movies, out to eat, went to an Atwater wedding, went to a few Atwater funerals, all with this other woman, who she thought was me the entire time... then embarrassed explained that somehow this other woman had convinced her and all my aunts and uncles and cousins that she was me and they had all believed she was me... she further explained that, upon seeing the real me up close, all her old pre-2010 memories of me flooded back and she immediately recognized me as me, and said that she can't figure out why it was that she never noticed this imposter was not me, because now seeing me face to face for the first time in over a decade, that this imposter looks and sounds and acts and talks and dresses nothing like me at all and there is no logical reason why she SHOULD have thought the imposter was me at all.

I suppose this would explain odd things like in 2016 the day the Biddeford police came over, with his phone on speaker, talking to an Old Orchard police officer and the conversation was:

BPD: "Nope, she's right here in Biddeford, I'm talking to her right now."

OPD: "Yeah, see? I told you this isn't her."

Man police called "Mark": "That is EelKat!"

OPD: "No, it isn't!"

BPD: "WolfBoy, you gotat stop with the fake complaints about Wendy, she's right here in Biddeford."

Mark: "That woman in the cowboy hat is Wendy."

Me: "I don't own a cowboy hat."

OPD: "I think you don't wear jeans either do you?"

ME: "I'm a Mormon. The Church does not allow women to wear pants."

OBP: "See? Told you she never wears pants."

Mark: "SHE TOLD ME SHE WAS EELKAT!"

OBD: "That's not EelKat. Wendy is the one everyone calls EelKat and that's not Wendy. Wendy is in Biddeford right now, we got an officer at her apartment talking to her right now."

Mark: "THAT IS WENDY! SHE TOLD ME SHE WAS WENDY!"

OPD: "This woman is not Wendy. We know Wendy really well. Her dad is an OOB Fireman. Her grandfather founded the Old orchard beach Fire Department. Her great grandfather founded our town. We know the Allens really well. That woman is not one of them."

Mark: "THAT IS MY LAND AND I WANT HER OFF OF IT."

OPD: "WorlfBoy, I have already told you, this land belongs to Miss Allen. We checked the deed. This woman is not Miss Allen and YOU do not own this land."

BPD: "Should I have an ambulance bring Wendy down to Old Orchard, so you can see who she is?"

Mark: "What are you talking about an ambulance for?!?!"

BPD: "Sir, I don't think you know who Miss Allen is. She's bedridden. She's a cripple. She's a quadriplegic. And both of you are treepassing on her private property. Legally we can arrest both of you."

That event always puzzled me. The police never did tell me who either the woman or WolfBoy Mark were, just said that they'd handle it and keep them both of my property.

As I don't know anyone named Mark, I never did find out who Mark wolfBoy was. And apparently no one knows who the real name of this woman impersonating me and as I personally have never seen her I don't know if she is somebody I know or not.

So, I knew in 2016 because of that event that someone was claiming to be me. But it was not until summer 2025, just 6 months ago, when I started walking outside pushing my wheelchair around the block, that I first became aware of how massively, enormously wide spread this woman's level of impersonating me really was.

Additionally, my banks accounts had been closed. By who or when is unknown. bein quardapalegic since 2013 until 2021, and not able to walk any distance until 2023, means I found out about it in 2023, the first time I was able to go to the bank since 2013.

I had opened both a savings account and a checking account in 1979, so these two accounts were over forty years old, and the only bank account I had ever had. In 2023, I went to the bank for the first time since becoming crippled in 2013, as it was the first time of my ability to get that far away from my bed in a decade, to be told:

"I'm sorry, these accounts are close."

At first I thought, they must have been closed due to inactivity. So I asked: "Where's my money then?"

Confused the girl said: "You withdrew all of it when you closed the account."

Equally confussed I said to her: "I've been bedridden and paralized from a broken spine, I haven't been out of bed in ten years. How could I possibly have come in here and closed my accounts. I did not close my accounts. Who did?"

The girl got the manager, a woman who knew me. "Wendy I have not seen you in years, how's things been?"

I told her of being crippled, patalized, a broken spine, bedridden for a decade, only now just starting to gain any level of revocery, and now just finding out my accounts were closed. She was horrified on many levels, said she had no idea my injury had happened, no one had told her, no iddea my accounts were closed, knew I had been coming to this back since the 1970s, and immediatly went to check the records.

Indeed, my savings account and my checking account were both closed, money gone, withdrawn. But here was a further issue: Thye bank's system, after an account has been closed for 6 months, automaticly deletes all records, save the account number itself, with the one word "closed".

So, at some point between 2013 and 2022 someone, they don't know who, withdrew ll my money, they don't know how much, and closed both accounts. And because it happened over 6 months prior to my discovering it, they no record of when exactly it happened. We simply know that the last handwritten date in my physical checkbook was in 2013, so it could have happened, all the way back then. Who knows.

So this local woman who is impersonating me, she also took all my money, which is WHY I have no money to rebuild the house that these people ALSO drove a backhoe over. It is WHY I am still homeless since 2013 and now into 2026, and why I am staying with various local relatives during my recovery.

Who it is who drove a backhoe over my house August 8, 2013, the police have been unable to determin. They've only been able to deterim who owns the backhoe and he claims the backhoe was stolen, driven out of his driveway, and down the road... someone HAD to have seen that happen, but so far no one has come forward to say so.

This seems to also explain why I have online, several relatives who claim I have attended weddings and funerals of relatives whom I have never even heard of before.

Frequently a cousin named "Nina" is mentions, and to my knowledge I have ZERO relatives named "Nina" so I haven't a fucking clue who this "Nina" cousin is that supposedly I know really well.

And I'm thinking, this perhaps might explain the wild and very violent gang that shows up harassing me about someone named Tod Murphey, whom they claim I know, even though I've no clue who Tod Murphey is.

And I'm wondering too, is this imposter also the reason none of my family, friends, and relatives were aware that my son was murdered... in fact most seem unaware that I had a son, named Xavier Octavian Allen Wildes.

And it seems that this woman showed up ONLY DAYS after my son's murder making it look like she showed up with the SPECIFIC GOAL OF USING MISDIRECTION TO TRY TO HIDE MY SON'S MURDER from people closest to me.

This woman, whom, I still don't know who she is, and apparently nighter does anyone she's been interacting with... IMPERSONATED ME OFFLINE... interacting with my friends, family, and relatives, for NINE YEARS... WITHOUT A SINGLE ONE OF THEM NOTICEING THAT SHE WAS NOT ME!

And I use to ask why no one ever visited me in the hospital or why no one visited me NOT EVEN ONCE the entire time I was quadriplegic... and now I know the reason is because someone who clearly knew how bad off I was, impersonated me, but they didn't even TRY... they drove around in a car nothing like anything I would own, they wore clothe I wouldn't be caught dead in, they ARE NOT BLIND, NOT MUTE, NOT IN A WHEELCHAIR, and they are WHITE... and no one noticed that I was suddenly miraculously no longer blind, no longer mute, no longer in a wheelchair, no longer brown skinned, no longer wearing dresses, no longer wearing head scarfs, suddenly talking about bizarre things I don't believe in like aliens... and not one of them, not even my relatives recognized that she was not me?

That's what I thought of today, when this person who knows me and my cars, but hasn't seen me in a year, and forgot, both that my car is a wild paint job antique Volvo and I'm in a wheelchair.

I think I am very surprised to realize that it's so easy for so many people to forget glaring details on such extremes.

Most people in my life, had no clue I was bedridden quadriplegics from 2013 to 2021, because, some one who is not even my race, and made zero attempt to look or sound like me, made no attempt to have any of my disabilities... pretended to be me that entire time, and no one noticed the change in race the no longer being blind the no longer being mute, the no longer being a Mormon, the no longer wearing tradition 14th century garb,, the no longer driving art cars... she simply TOLD THEM she was me, used nothing but my name, and was able to live here in Old Orchard and Biddeford, Maine for NINE YEARS passing herself off as me without NO ONE noticing?

• Do you realize how terrifying that is?

Do you know what that means?

That means someone can do the same thing to YOU, you who is right now reading this, someone can just take your life and pretend to be you, and they don't even have to look like you, act like you, dress like you, NOTHING, they only have to tell your friends and relatives they ARE you, and no one in your life will have paid enough attention to who you really are, so no one will notice they are not you.

And I KNOW it can happen to any one of you, because it happened to me, and I'm still flabbergasted by how MANY close friends and family members were so easily deceived by someone who didn't even make an effort to look or be like me at all.

I just don't get it.

Is the average person's memory really that bad?

Who is this woman and why is she doing this?

The FBI believes she is connected to the golf club woman who crippled me and murdered my son.

The FBI believes, the golf club woman THOUGHT she killed me, and when she found out I survived her violent attack, but was paralyzed, that she had one of her friends or family members pretend to be me, and do everything they possibly could, to gaslight everyone connected to me, into FORGETTING I was pregnant, FORGETTING that a backhoe drove over my house,

only a few days before the golf club woman murdered my son and crippled me

FORGETTING, everything I stood for, FORGETTING who I was and what I believed, and REPLACING it with a bunch of wild crazy bullshit about aliens, ufos, and gibberish nonsense.

The FBI also believes, this woman to be someone REALLY CLOSE to my parents... in fact, the FBI believes she is the daughter of one of my mother's brothers. According to the FBI, some of my female cousins look enough like me, that they could pass themselves off as me. The FBI think this to be WHY, people in MY FAMILY, including all 3 of my mother's sisters, and 6 of my mother's brothers, and more then 200 of my first cousin, ALL BELIEVED this woman to be me.

The FBI believes, that being a relative, one of my 400+ first cousins, the FBI believe with that many people in the family, it is easy to confuse faces.

According to the FBI, all she would have need was for ONE person, my mother my father, one of my siblings, some one from my church, my husband... the FBI says... it would only have taken someone like one of them, some who knew me really well, knew she wasn't me, but TOLD the rest of the relative that she WAS me... the FBI says, if one person who knew me well, DECLAIRED this woman to be me, the ENTIRE rest of the 400+ people my family, would simply believe without question, she was me. Any "Oh but I thought Wendy..." would quickly be shut down by that one person, by "Oh, you're remembering wrong, she here she is."

The FBI says some one very, very, VERY close to me, a parent, a sibling, a spouse, knows who the gold club woman is, knows who this impersonator woman is, and is working with both of them, to do everything in their power to erase all memory of the existence of my murdered 8 month old son.

and on that note:

If you encounter a page which asks for a password, no, you can not request access. There are over 2k pages of this website set to password access, due to the ongoing FBI investigation into my son's murder. If you are a police officer authorized access these pages but do not have the passwords, let me know, I will deliver the passwords to the specific pages you are allowed to access, to you via the Portland FBI office and you can pick them up from the FBI agent in charge of the murder investigation.

Pages where you can find out more information on that:

• How did the FBI get involved?

• Never Forget my son was murdered

• Do you know who this woman is? And no 146 Portland Ave is not for sale.

• Who is Tod Murphy and why does this woman arrive to yell the name Tod Murphey at me on the anniversary of my son's murder every year since 2021?

• Receiving death threats over a septic tank and a little brown log cabin, but I own neither a septic tank nor a little brown log cabin... what even are these thugs talking about?

Update: January 29, 2026: similar topic

wow, some people are saying there have been disruptions at some Iron Lung showings, very rude people ruining the experience for others. I really hope that dooesn't happen here.

I have been bedridden with a broken spine since 2013, quadriplegic the first few years, paraplegic the years later, today in 2026, I have movement in 2 fingers on my right hand, and near no use at all of my left hand; since 2021 I have been relearning to walk... in 2021 it took me 4 hours to walk 75 feet distance. Today in 2026 I can now walk (while pushing my wheelchair and using it for support) 750 feet in just an hour and a half (that the length of the average driveway by the way).

I was bedridden, paralyzed with no arm or leg movement for 9 years, have had only limited arm and leg movement since then, and not being able to go outside for over a decade, means I have not been to a movie in 13 years.

Though the theatre is only 15 minutes away, it will take us 2 hours to get me out of bed, in my wheelchair, out of my wheelchair, in the car, get the wheelchair folded and also in the car, drive the 15 minutes to the movie, get the chair back out of the car, get me in the chair, get in the theatre, get into the room, get me out of the wheelchair and into a theatre seat... that is a TWO HOUR process. And it's not easy for my boyfriend, who is 80 years old to do all this. Yes, we are elderly.

Being paralyzed since November 14, 2013 is WHY I started watching Mark, I've not missed a single video of his once since 2013. I was watching him BEFORE he even had 10k followers.

I say this, because I would really hate, to go through the amount of struggle and effort it takes to get out of bed in the first place, to get to the theatre, to see the first movie I have seen in over a decade, just to show up and have rude disrespectful people disrupting it and ruining any ability to enjoy the show.

Its very disheartening to hear that things like this are happening and really hope it doesn't happen to us when we go.

Updated January 31, 2026... Just saw Iron Lung, love it!

@eelkat Just saw #markiplier #ironlungmovie at #saco #maine #applecinemas ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Yaoi Author And for those familiar with the history of the making of Iron Lung... here's a throwback to the day I met Ethan in Portland, Maine a decade ago:

Update: November 14, 2025 - today is the anniversary of my son's murder...

Today is November 14, 2025, the anniversary of my son's murder November 14, 2013. My 8 month old infant son Xavier Octavian Allen Wildes, was murdered my a woman who beat his head in with a golf club, at BugLight Lighthouse, at Southern Maine Community College, and also broke my spine the same day, causing me to be paralyzed and crippled ever since. In the 12 years since I have slightly regained use of my hands, only fully regained use of two fingers, and am still relearning to walk. The woman who did this has not yet been identified or caught, the FBI is still seeking information leading to identifying her.

And there is still not one single person in my family who cares. Not my mother. Not my father. Not my siblings. Not my more than a dozen uncles. Not my more than a dozen aunts. Not my more then two hundred first cousins. Not my more than four hundred second cousins. 

Not even Ben, the murdered baby's father. 

My question is, how does one entire family become so cruel, uncaring, and hateful? Oh wait I know… I'm an author of Gay Romance novels, and every single one of them have told me I deserved to be crippled and deserved to have my baby killed because according to them, that was how God is punishing me for being a female who got a job, learned to read and write, supporting gay rights, and had the audacity to go to college. Their extreme animosity and self righteous telling me I deserved it, and it happening at the college, is why the FBI believes a relative hired the woman.

But today is the anniversary of both my son's murder and my becoming crippled and I really am just getting fed up with how my family and relatives not only don't care but are still refusing to help with the FBIs murder investigation. 😢

-end of November 14, 2025 update

Full details of the FBI Investigation can be found here... be warned this page takes 5+ hours to read and has a very long load time due to it having all the scans of files and photos of various aspects of the court case

---- this page is EVERYTHING we are allowed to publicly release---

..., but is only about a 10th of everything that has happened, as we are only allowed to release a very tiny amount of the total details.

What we are allowed to release, is being publically released, in the hopes that someone reading this might have information leading to the arrest of my son's murderer and all the people involved with the harassment.

The Space Dock 13 WebRing

Yes, this website (founded in 1996) is old enough to have WebRings on it, and they are still in use.

Don't know what a WebRing is? 

They were how we webmasters used to get traffic to our websites before the invention of search engines (aka before Jeeves, DogPile, Yahoo. Google, Bing, or the rest existed). In their simplest form a WebRing is an html code that rotates link displays. In their more advanced form they are java scripts that give random results. Each ring had three active links titled "Previous", "Random", and "Next", clicking any of the 3 links would take you to the next website in the ring.

Web Rings are the REASON the internet was called "the world wide web". To use them, each webmaster submitted their site to the ring, a single code held 100 websites, and codes could be stacked to hold 100 code sets (or 10,000 links to 10,000 websites), each web master in the list, would then place the code in the footer of their website.

This created the SPIDER WEB that was the literal WEB OF LINKS that gave the internet it's name "World Wide Web" and is WHY websites are CALLED "web sites". And technically, your site is not a WEB site unless it is connected to a WEBRing, likewise you technically are not a WEBMaster if you do not build WEBrings links for you WEBsite to connect to the WEB.

Unfortunately, most knowledge of WebRings, and whi sites were called WEBsites and sites on the WEB were called the World Wide Web, vanished from the internet in 2014 when the official WebRing.org company who managed 90%+ of the internet's WebRings went out of business after the infamous Google Panda 2013 bot attack that delisted ALL websites from the Google Index if they contained a WebRing of links to other websites in it's footer.

And while most sites abandoned the use of WebRing Codes on their sites, Space Dock 13 did not. The Space Dock 13 WebRing remains active, now 28 years after it's creation. Over the decades however, one by one all the other websites in the ring have gone off line, and as they did, I replaced the url with a link to a page of my own website (as this is a java code - it updated on every website without the others needing to change anything). Today in 2026, eelkat.com is the last remaining website in the ring, and now all 10k links go only to pages on eelkat.com, no longer sending you to other websites.