Why I am not proud of Disability Pride Month.
In fact, I think it’s deplorable and downright offensive.



By Wendy C Allen
eelkat_red_scarf.jpgWendy Christine Allen, 2019, able to sit up in a chair for the first time in years, and able to raise up my arm and wiggle fingers. This was when I started playing Witcher 3 on Twitch as part of my physical therapy to regain finger movement. Playing Witcher 3 daily from 2016 to 2019, is how I regained the use of my thumb and two for fingers on my right hand... it is also why I stopped playing Witcher 3 in 2019, once I had strengthen my two forefingers enough to start typing again.

Wendy Christine Allen, Old Orchard Beach's Autistic Author, Artist, Illustrator, & Art Car Designer

Counting Down to the September 23, 2028 50th Anniversary of my first published book (September 23, 1978)

If you are here looking for The Twighlight Manor series, The Crystonite Wars series, The Wild Years series, The White Rock Asylum for the Criminally Insane series, The Twisted Tales series, the Captured By a MerMan series, The Space Dock 13 series, The Kats of Planet Ptarmagin series, the stories about Miss Citten the Eel-Kat, or the stories about Etiole... ALL of those series were combined and consolidated into The Adventures of Quaraun the Insane Pink Necromancer series in 2014, so ALL the different series, are now under one series title.

List of the published titles still in print:

The Index of over three thousand stories in The Pink Necromancer series

What the series is about, for those new here:

The introduction to The Pink Necromancer Series. 

If you want some stories to get you started in The Pink Necromancer series, reading these first will give you a good introduction to the 3 main characters:

My Elves Are JellyFish...and I asked Google AI and ChatGPT 5.6 what they thought of this.

As requested, my daily writing prompt series is now available print paperback editions on Amazon.

There are 20 volumes of this writing prompt series currently planned and in varying stages of finishing, hopefully all 20 will be published by the end of 2026. I likely will do a 2nd series of writing prompt books in 2027.

The first of the Visual Novels/Video Games for The Adventures of Quaraun the Inane/The Pink Necromancer series is published and available on Itch.io, there are 3 more planned for release in 2026, 6 more planned for release in 2027, and the big 60-hour 80k word 150 page one (Quaraun Goes To the Fair) is planned for a 2028 release.

There is a Pink Necromancer card game and a Pink Necromancer board game, as well as a Pink Necromancer table top RPG supliment for Dungeons and Dragons, all in the works, and to be released over the next couple of years as well.

Health update: August 4, 2026 - in recovery for 6 months+ (at least until mid-January 2027...all book and video game releases are pushed back at least 6 months) see video below for why...
@eelkat

health update #maine #disabilityawareness #wheelchairlife #wheelchairvlogger #multiplesclerosis

♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author
@eelkat Health update: #chickenpox #bellspalsy #RamsayHuntsyndrome #paralysis #recovery ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author
@eelkat

I seem to have had another stroke (during the night while I was asleep?) #stroke #paralysis

♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

Update Sept 3, 2026:

I am able to get around enough to take Koko to dog park... today is 29 days since getting out of hospital. My diet is still mostly liquid, but im eating some solid food again, but its like rice or soft mushy baby food type stuff because I still can not chew yet, though I can swallow again. My jaw is still not functioning good so im having trouble talking still. So there's been slight improvement to my mouth, throat, and jaw, but, zero improvement to my eye, which is a major concern, be Im almost fully blind right now. im legally blind since birth in my left eye, so I have no ability to fall back on using my left eye. My right eye is the one injured and my vision in it is "40% decreased" according to my doctor, but it wasn't good vision to begin with, and right now my right eye is not much different from my legally blind left eye. Which I why I have to have someone drive my car for me instead of me driving my car myself right now, which is very frustrating, because, being a female, I had to fight for over twenty years to be allowed to drive. I started sneaking out at age 31 and dressing as a man to go to Old Orchard Beach high school to get a ged, because us females are not allowed to go to school. And i was 37 years old when snuck out to the DMV and got a driver's permit and started going to college. I was 42 and 8 months pregnant when my family found out I was going to college and thats when I was punished by the backhoe driving over my house and my spine broken with a golf club and my baby born right then and killed with same golf club. So it's very frustrating now, so soon after finally being able to drive , to now not be able to drive because of an eye injury, especially after 14 years of being paralyzed from the golf club and not being allowed to have a wheelchair, again, because i am female and we females are simply not allowed to do anything. I hate the culture I was born into. I wish I had the freedom to go to school and drive a car the way American women do. I wish having my spine broken with a golf club and my baby killed with a golf club and a backhoe driven over my house was not how men in my family punishment women in my family for learning to read and write. Its so frustrating not being able to to drive again, so soon after 14 years being paralyzed, and being paralyzed by the golf club was the punishment for getting a driver's license back in 2013 after 30 years of men not letting me have one. I hate my family's culture and how they treat us women.

I get so sick of Americans telling me how they wish they could be a Gypsy… they are either misogynist woman hating pigs, or delusional idiots who haven't got a clue how shittily we Gypsy women are treated by Gypsy men, because no one in their righ mind who knows anything about Gypsy culture would ever want to be part of it. I hate that I was born a Gypsy. 

update sept 7, 2026

"You would not make a good teacher"... what does that mean, and why are there so many people on Railroad Ave and Western Ave and Cutts St why walk up to me and say that to me?

I find it very confusing. I have low functioning Autism (the Rain Man type) and so i have very little understanding of words beyond the basic ones, and i never went to to school, so I never learned maths or sciences, and I only had remedial classes at Southern Maine Community College, because I did not have an education to enroll with regular, I was there taking every reading and writing class they had to learn how to read and write, and also took speaking classes to learn how to talk (i spoke Shetland Scottish language because that was language my grandmother spoke but she died when I was 8 so I only knew that language to speak and write, and I was 37 when I went to college and 42 when I learned English speaking and I still cant speak English good yet), all the other classes I took were art painting and cooking.

So the phrase "You would not make a good teacher" makes no sense to me because it seems to imply that I am trying to be a teacher, but I don't have anything close to the education ti be a teacher, and im not trying to be a teacher. So I don't know why people keep saying this phrase to me and I assume it must have some sort of a slang meaning, but I can't figure out what it could be of why do these people keep saying it to me.

see video below for more information: 


@eelkat "You would not make a good teacher"... what does that mean, and why are there so many people on Railroad Ave and Western Ave and Cutts St why walk up to me and say that to me? I find it very confusing. I have low functioning Autism (the Rain Man type) and so i have very little understanding of words beyond the basic ones, and i never went to to school, so I never learned maths or sciences, and I only had remedial classes at Southern Maine Community College, because I did not have an education to enroll with regular, I was there taking every reading and writing class they had to learn how to read and write, and also took speaking classes to learn how to talk (i spoke Shetland Scottish language because that was language my grandmother spoke but she died when I was 8 so I only knew that language to speak and write, and I was 37 when I went to college and 42 when I learned English speaking and I still cant speak English good yet), all the other classes I took were art painting and cooking. So the phrase "You would not make a good teacher" makes no sense to me because it seems to imply that I am trying to be a teacher, but I don't have anything close to the education ti be a teacher, and im not trying to be a teacher. So I don't know why people keep saying this phrase to me and I assume it must have some sort of a slang meaning, but I can't figure out what it could be of why do these people keep saying it to me. #mainelife #biddefordmaine #maine #disabilitytiktok #Biddeford ♬ original sound Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

update Sept 15, 2026:

I have some slight movement in some my fingers again again after over a decade being paralyzed

you remember how I used to be a professional doll making, pattern designer, and embroiderer, back before I became paralized and before my son was murdered and being the backhoe drove over my house?

all my equipment, sewing machines, ect were all destroyed by the backhoe driving over my house, and I have been quardepelegic for over a decade because of it so could not use my hands to sew or draw or embroider, and so only continued to do my writing of novels since then because I could do that with dragon dictation software,

well, since 2016, I been playing Witcher 3 and don't starve video games on twitch livestream, one hand two fingers, as part of my therapy to regain nerve and muscle use of my fingers, and now after 10 years of that, I have somewhat more movement in my fingers and im thinking maybe I can try to do embroidery and doll making again, but not sure, anyways, now im rebuying all of my sewing and embroidery equipment that the backhoe destroyed when it drove over my house, and hopefully I can use my hand enough to embroider again.

waiting for stuff to arrive in mail, so soon I should find out if ten years of twitch gaming has given me enough muscle strength to use my fingers to embroider again.

update to the previous video, answering viewer question about lack of hospital vs broken spine

Wheelchair Fundraiser... I need to upgrade to a power wheelchair, the manual one just isn't enough anymore. But the power wheelchair is $25k. Yes, twenty five thousand dollars. Wtf? I can get a car for a quarter that price, why are wheelchairs so damned expensive? That's more money then I make in five years, so I need to start a fundraiser for it.

So, I just found out about a thing and I don’t like it. Apparently this is Disability Pride Month which I didn’t know was a thing. I am an ambulatory wheelchair user and rollator user and walker user and cane user, switching between them depending on what i need through out the day. I also use wrist braces and knee braces and in hot weather crynopacks (like space age level ice packs) due to MS heat intolerance (meaning I pass out and go into heat stroke at ANY temp over 68F).

I’ve had rheumatism since I was 4,

MS since I was 16,

a stroke at 31 that left me without the use of my left arm/hand,

I have hip dysplacia,

floating kneecaps,

and a serious spinal cord injury since I was 37 that required me to spend many years relearning to use my hands and walk.

I also have a service dog.

I was also born legally blind and have non verbal low functioning autism (rainman type).

I am therefore severely disabled on many variable, many types of disabled, and while some (like being legally blind) are just "normal" for me because of being lifelong things, others are newer changes (like the spinal cord injury and relearning to walk) that cause deep frustration because of limiting things that I used to be able to do without thinking about it (like walking).

Well, in short I absolutely HATE, outright LOATH being disabled.

I hate the limits it puts on my freedom.

I suppose it depends on how you become disabled? November 14, 2013 a woman weilding a golf club and screaming transgender slurs while accusing me (a blind, mute, and near deaf from birth and 8 months pregnant cis female, who could neither see her nor call out for help) of being a man in a dress, severed my spine and spinal column, broke my hip, broke my knees, and murdered my baby.

It took me 18 months to relearn to walk, and return to work, but then on June 26, 2016, the same woman showed up at work and repeated the attack this time with a shopping cart, and this time left me paralyzed for the rest of my life. I have the use of the first 3 fingers of my right hand, and that’s it. It is nearing the 12th anniversary of my son’s murder and my becoming a bedridden crippled.

And the FBI has still not found or identified the woman, nor do they know her motive other than she was accusing me of being a transvestite (her word).

So, now in addition to being born a blind, mute, near deaf person, I am also paralyzed and bedridden for the rest of my life. I don’t feel proud that a deranged lunatic stranger murdered my son and left me disabled.

I hate that I can not longer go to work or college because my disability limits my able to even get out of bed most days. I am most definitely NOT proud to be disabled.

Now to today. Over on social media I get a (well meaning) message from someone asking if I know of any pride events going on and if I’ll be attending. And my response was Pride Month was last month wasn’t it? But also no, I don’t know anything about American holidays and I don’t go to any events.

They say, no, not Gay Pride Month, it’s Disability Pride Month.

Uhm... what? What the fuck is disability Pride month? I never heard of it.


They tell me, oh its great, you get to show off your mobility aids and make videos about being proud to be disabled.

Wait... what? Proud to be disabled? What? I am most definitely NOT proud to be disabled. I would like very much to NOT be disabled. I work very hard to regain my nerve and muscle use so that I can get rid of these fucking mobility aids I’m forced to live with. Why would I want to show off mobility aids I don’t even want in the first place? Disability Pride sounds like the single most insensitive and offensive thing any able-bodied idiot who was never disabled ever thought of and I told them so.

They were openly shocked and confused as to why i found the the thought of Disability Pride to be offensive.

They suggested I head to TikTok and YouTube to watch Disability Pride videos and then I would see how great Disability Pride is. So I just spent the last 5 or 6 hours watch TikTok and YouTube Disability Pride videos and... well, now I find the whole concept even more horrifying, even more insensitive, and even more offensive then I had at first imagined it could be.

I searched for generic Disability Pride, then more specific Autism Pride, MS Pride, Wheelchair Pride ect... and... 99% of the videos were not good at all, very mean, very hateful, all pretty much the same: "fuck you able bodied people, I love being in a wheelchair", "fuck you neurotypical people, I love having Autism", and so on.

Really? I don’t love having Autism, I hate it. While I agree there needs to be more awareness about what Autism is, having Autism is certainly nothing to be proud of, also, what the fuck? I don’t think about single one of those videos was an actual autistic at all. They were always hyper bouncing, hyper screaming, hyper yapping, hyper motor mouth, hyper hyper... so far deep end total absolutely complete opposite of the ACTUAL symptoms of autism (sitting without moving forward hours in a near catatonic state, not being able to speak, avoiding loud sounds... I don’t know what wild crazed, hyper bouncing thing they have, but it ain’t real and actual Autism that’s for sure... I did notice they usually bragged of being self diagnosed... uhm... yeah... I seriously dought a teen can self diagnose ANYTHING. )

look up an ACTUAL MEDICAL BOOK FOR DOCTORS about autism… if you can talk, I gauruntee you do NOT have autism. If you can string together a full sentence AND get at least 3 words of it out of you mouth in UNDER TEN MINUTES — you do NOT have Autism.

If you have a high IQ or a scientific brain, you do NOT have autism.

if you are a nerdy little scientist, you do NOT have autism.

if you have enough brain cells to self diagnose yourself, hey, guess what, you NOT retarded enough to have autism

yes, retarded, used in the actual CORRECT medical term.

Think about it for a minute.

The actual CORRECT medical term for Autism is: “Mental Retardation” and it means the OPPOSIT of high IQ. It means LOW IQ.

Do you know that Autism is simple the layman’s term for “MENTAL RETARDATION” and you are CLINICALY MENTALLY RETARDED (yes, that is the ACTUAL MEDICAL TERM) if you are autistic.

Let that soak in for a minute.

MENTALL RETARDED is the real and actual medical diagnoses term for REAL and ACTUAL Autism… sooo… no, NO ONE with either a high IQ or a “little science brain” has Autism.

Those Autism pride TikToks were nothing but a load of bullshit misinformation. None of them bring awareness to have serverly crippling a disability autism ACTUALLY is.

MOST ACTUALLY MEDICALLY DIAGNONESED adults with autism are mute, can not feed themselves, wear adult diapers, require a nurse to bath them, feed them with a spoon, brush their hair… and THESE ACTUALLY DIAGNOSED autistic, usually spend there entire child, teen, and adult lives in a nursing home, and never once in their entire lives see the outside of that nursing home, don’t know things like YouTube or TikTok exist so certainly are not making them…

…in fact, I, who have an ACTUAL Autism diagnosis, am considered to be on the high functioning end because I can feed myself, brush my hair, change my own adult diapers, AND once in a while I’m able to speak a full sentence verbally too.

Stop listening to the fucking conspiracy theory idiots online and look up what the ACTUAL medical symptoms of Autism are.

  • I guarantee you won’t be so quick to self diagnose yourself as autistic once you find out what Autism REALLY is and what it’s REAL symptoms are.

NEWSFLASH: calling yourself autism when you clearly are not even remotely autistic in the slightest, then bragging you self diagnosed yourself… that is incredibly OFFENSIVE to those of us who are ACTUALLY struggling with REAL autism.

people see your idiotic bullshit motormouth yapping, your hyper bouncing around, and then they give us REAL autistics hell for being mute and moving slow!

You want to be PROUD of your mental retardation? GET AN ACTUAL MEDICAL DIAGNOSIS OF THAT MENTAL RETARDATION!

You know what? Most of us people who are ACTUALLY mental retarded… wooops… I mean ACTUALLY autistic, HATE the entire bull shitting self diagnosed community because you do NOTHING to spread awareness of what it is like to live with autism and you do a hell of a lot more damage then good.

It’s bad enough we have to struggle with our disability, because because you want to run around on social media misrepresenting our illness, we also have to deal with the constant bullshit of strangers coming up to us and saying: “Well, you can’t be autistic because I saw on TikTok this girl who was autistic and she can talk and learn school just fine”.

I am 49 years old, and I still can’t count. I do not know addition or substraction. I can not read clocks. I can not read calenders. Why? Because I have autism, that’s why.

And it's NOT something to be proud of.

I've spent DECADES trying to learn numbers and counting and math. I hate that I can't do them.


And it’s MORE a lot more then just the mental limits.

What I saw on Autism Pride TikToks, was like “look at me theatrics masquerading as advocacy”. It was like a lot of people trying to say they were disabled just to join a popularity club. Half the time it was feeling like they weren’t really disabled, rather it felt like they thought being disabled was cool, so they called themselves autistic just to be a part of the cool gang.

It really sounded like they had zero clue any of the actual symptoms of autism, many of which are physically very crippling, autism impacts gastrointestinal and nerves and the nerve symptoms can be like stroke symptoms where you lose the ability to move your fingers or speak.

Nerve damage is a big part of autism, it’s why a lot of autistic can’t talk, can’t hold a spoon or brush their hair, or why many have to wear adult diapers.

The malfunction of nerves is rarely mentioned by self diagnosed autistics because they think autism is all about reading comic books or liking science class.

But actual real autism is a HUGE PHYSICAL disability that actually limits physical movements of certain muscles especially the jaws and fingers that’s why so many autistics can’t talk or can’t feed themselves!

  • Speech isn’t possible, not because someone doesn’t want to talk — but because the jaw and tongue physically won’t move.
  • Eating is hard or impossible, because the body won’t coordinate a spoon to mouth or chewing/swallowing.
  • Toileting isn’t manageable, because the sensory cues are blocked or the muscles don’t respond in time.
  • Hands won’t open. Fingers won’t grip. Legs won’t lift. You want to move — and you can’t.
  • The nervous system locks you in, but you’re still aware of everything happening around you.

That is profound, physically disabling autism — and it has nothing to do with being “gifted,” liking trains, or being socially awkward at parties. It’s a full-body condition, and a very serious one.

The gastro issues — if you have autism you are ALLERGIC to MOST EVERYTHING! Including most foods.

You spend 40%+ of you days vomiting your guts out because your body decided it wants to be allergic to twenty million different foods!

None of that is ever shown in the mainstream, self-diagnosis-driven narrative of autism online. 

On TikTok and similar platforms, what dominates are loud, rapid-fire talking heads — people claiming “autistic pride” while doing coordinated dance trends that ACTUAL autistics aren’t even physically capable of doing, delivering flawless monologues actual autistics are not physically capable of, and bragging about how “fun” and “relatable” their symptoms are.

It’s not just misleading. It’s dangerously misleading — because it erases real, non-speaking, highly disabled autistics like me from the conversation. 

And worse: it spreads a false picture to the world. 

That leads to caregivers, educators, and medical professionals underestimating what autism can actually mean — and denying support to those who need it the most.

Are any of these self diagnosed autistics talking about the constant acid reflux issues caused by the constant daily endless vomiting?

How about living with hives rash break outs 4 or 5 a times a month?

No! They brag that they like to read comic books and play with trains so therefore they self diagnosed as autistic!

What the fuck?

HOBBIES ARE NOT A DIAGNOSES OF A DISABILITY YOU FUCKING IDIOTS!


But the wheelchair ones where just total crazy denial on extremes. People saying things like "becoming wheelchair bound was the best thing that ever happened to me"... really? 90% of freedom being taken away is a good thing? How? How is having to rely on others for 90% of everything you used to do yourself the best thing ever?

I don’t get it. If the TikTok hive mind is to be believed, Disability Pride month is all about glorifying denial and bullying able bodied people, while pretending self diagnosed mental illness is like a badge of honour into an exclusive club.

Nothing I saw on any of the Disability Pride videos did anything but make disabled people look like arrogant self centred pricks. None of them brought any level of ACTUAL REAL awareness to disabilities. And most of it came off as snot nosed bratty teens being immature haters.

EDITED TO ADD: JULY 27, 2025

Okay, I'm answering a message that was sent here to me privatly, but due to the ongoing FBI investigation into my infant son's murder, my being crippled/paralized the same day by the same woman with the same golf club that murdered my son,  and the backhoe that drove over my house a few weeks prior to his murder, and the FBI's belief that  both the backhoe driving over my house August 8, 2013 and my son's murder November 14, 2013 were done by the same person, both as an attempt to drive me off my land so a 27 unit condo could be put there, I therefor  do not answer anything privatly, so here's my answer to said message:

No. You do not seem to have any level of concept for how extrordinarily limited my ability to move my arms, even now 11 years later is.

I can not exstend my left hand forward enough to reach 17" in front of me. The average person can easily reach 24"+ in front of them.

I can not straiten my left arm far enough up, down, or ahead to reach 17".

I just measured, just now, to get the exact number for you. I can get my finger tips to tap against 16" ahead of me. I can bend slightly my fingers around something 8" in front of me. But to actually grip my fist around something, the item must be 4" directly in front of my belly, no higher, no lower, no further ahead.

As you are trying to say I was writing online between 2014 to 2021 (even though I was not able to move my fingers more then slight tremors during that period) it is very clear you have ZERO understanding of how INCREADIBLY disabled my arms, hands, and fingers really are, even now still in 2025, 11 years after the attack.

You don't seem to have an actual understanding of how very little movement i have in my arm. How narrow a distance i can reach ahead of me. 

My left arm bends down, handing there dead and unmoving 24/7/365 for 11 years now, and it still does. The lower half from elbow to wrist, bends at an angle across my belly and stays there near completely immobile all day. 

I returned to typing in May 2021, same day I returned to the internet after not being online since November 2013... anyone you saw posting ANYWHERE online between November 2013 to May 2021: WAS NOT ME, because my hands were PARALIZED between that time period.  

Since May 2021, I've been typing not only with one hand, my right hand, but with only 3 fingers of one hand. I have no ability to type at all with ANY of my left hand fingers and for my right hand i am only able to move my thumb and first two fingers enough to type. Right now in 2025. It has taken me ELEVEN YEARS to regain enough nerve use of those three fingers, so that I can type what you are reading, right now.

When you understand how serverly crippled I actually am, you can then see the MASSIVE levels this online stalker has gone to between 2013 to 2021 to pretend to be me: Like I said before EVERYTHING being said about aliens, UFOs, demons, witchcraft, Stephen King, and haunted cars: NONE OF OT WAS SAID BY ME -- ALL OF IT was said by someone PRETENDING to be me, and taking advantage of the fact I was FULLY PARALIZED -- ARMS AND LEGS -- and not able to defend myself.

The FBI believes the person/s pretending to be me online are the SAME PEOPLE who drove a backhoe over my house August 8, 2013 (see photo - my house July 4, 2013 vs August 8, 2013 -146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach) and murdered my son November 14, 2013, and crippled me also November 14, 2013.

eelkats_house_before_after.jpg


And, I will say it again, if you have any information about my son’s murderer, DO NOT try to contact me... you MUST contact FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 or at 1 Middle Street forth floor, Portland, Maine.  He is in charge of the investigation into the backhoe, the murder, and my being crippled.

But the extreme limiting use of my hands is also why I use the cane in my right hand. I am supposed to be using my left hand for the cane. Dr gave me the cane and she tried to teach me to use it with left hand, because you are supposed to use cane on opposite side of injured hip, but my left hand is still near completely immobile, I can't move my fingers at all yet and can not hold cane in my left hand where it is supposed to be instead of my right hand. I had the underarm crutches for 18 months before switching to cane full time and the crutches were difficult because my arm would not bend so I could hold them correctly. 

Even now in July 2025, 11 years after the woman attacked with the golf club, I do everything with my right thumb and 1st two fingers. I've almost no movement in my other 7 fingers 

Its why I have not brushed my hair in several years. I can not both grip the brush, and lift my arm higher then my shoulder at the same time. And that’s my right arm which is my good arm.

Its why I have been having so much trouble cooking. I am still homeless these 11 years, later because the backhoe drove over my house August 8, 2013, and I have not yet recovered the injuries enough to go back to work, so I have not yet had money to rebuild my house again. Because I am homeless I go to my dad's apartment in Biddeford to cook, but it is very difficult as I cannot lift the pans once water is put in them. I can not open the top door of the freezer. I can not reach anything on the top 2 shelves or in the cupboards or on top of fridge. All because only one of my arms lifts higher then my belly level and the other doesn't go higher then shoulder level. Its extreme pain if I try to go higher. 

So, no, again, you really are mixing me up with someone else, as I am far more disabled then you seem to be aware, and I am not physically capable of doing 90% of the things you are even talking about.


EVERYTHING We Are Allowed To Publicly Release About The FBI Investigation Can Be Found HERE

Do you know who this woman is?
If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

Clairescreenshot.pngIf you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

On November 14, 2013, she used a golf club to bash out the brains of my 8-month-old baby Xavier-Octavian Allen. She called herself “Claire” as though she thought I knew her, but I know no one named Claire and had never seen her before. She was about 65 years old and would be around 75 years old today in 2025. The FBI believes the woman who murdered my son is the same woman who hired the backhoe to drive over my house on August 8, 2013, a few weeks before my son’s murder.

Clairescreenshot.pngIf you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322
eelkats_house_before_after.jpgMy house at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, on July 4, 2013 and on August 8, 2013 after vandals drove a backhoe over it. The backhoe is still running in this photo, I got home from work while they were doing it and the white haired man jumped out and ran away leaving the backhoe running, until it ran out of gas. It sat in my yard for 6 months until the police finally towed it away.

The FBI believes this woman who crippled me and murdered my baby on November 14, 2013, is connected to the backhoe that illegally drove over my house making me homeless on August 8, 2013.

Between June 2001 and continuing on into 2025, there have been over 200 violent attacks on 146 Portland Ave, Old orchard Beach, Maine, including the beheading of 75 pet roosters April 2007, whose headless bodies were hung in my rosebushes from rope nooses.

The FBI believes ALL of these events are being done in an attempt to drive me off my land. 

According to the FBI, in 2007, a developer went to the Old Orchard Beach Town Hall and filed an illegal building permit for a 27 unit condominium, on my land and CLAIMED to be the owner of my land. This land has been in my family since 1531, we are Native Americans of the Kickapoo tribe and there are more than 500 graves, most dating from the 1500s to 1600s on my land. 

This land has been in my family well over 500 years, and I inherited it from my grandmother Helen Ricker Allen in 1983.

The FBI believes, ALL of the slander/rumours that falsely accuse me of being transgender were ALSO started by this woman who murdered my son, in a further attempt to drive me from my land via working locals of Old Orchard Beach into a trans-hating frenzy.

If you are a real estate agent and ANY ONE contacts you interested in buying 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, PLEASE report that "client" IMMEDIATLY to FBI Agent Andy Drewer, head of my son's murder investigation, and head of the investigation into the 200+ acts of vandalism and hate crimes which have occurred at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine between 2001 to 2025.

If you have ANY information about ANY of the incidents, attacks, vandalisms, and hate crimes that took place between 2001 and 2025, on 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, please give that information to FBI agent Andy Drewer as well.

My land is not for sale and ANY ONE offering to buy it is likely connected to this woman who murdered my son.

Clairescreenshot.pngIf you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

ANYONE interested in buying my land has a HIGH PROBABILITY of being hired BY MY SON'S MURDERER, and you MUST send their information to the FBI.

She is the same woman who severed my spine with the same golf club used to murder my baby. She had distinctive two-inch wide stripes in her hair all the way around her head, platinum blond and dark reddish brown, in a pageboy haircut.

If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer,please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

I have 3 broken vertebrae, 3 ruptured discs, a broken sariliac, hip dysplasia (broken hip and broken pelvic bone, with hip bone pushed back into pelvic bone and fused together), in addition to rheumatism in both hips, both knees, and both wrists, as well as MS.

Rheumatism I've had since I was 8.

MS I've had since I was 16.

All the rest was done by the crazy blonde woman with the golf club, November 14, 2013, at Southern Maine Community College. I was also 8 months pregnant and she murdered my son as well. I was paralyzed for 18 months and had to relearn to walk. Her hair was wild extreme unnatural rave style 2 to 3 inch wide platinum blond and dark blonde-brown stripes.

In May 2015 I returned to work, walking minimally with a cane.

On June 24, 2016, the same mystery blond woman with her hair now dyed rusted reddish blond, woman, this time driving a late 1990s vintage gold Volvo station wagon, drove up beside my car, while I was putting groceries in my car at Scarborough Walmart, jumped out, grabbed an empty shopping cart from the shopping cart corral, and attacked again, same as she did with golf club three years earlier. This attack is the one which caused worse damage, and I have still not yet recovered from now in 2025.

That is why I have the cane, walker, rollator, and wheelchair. And which one I use is determined by how much pain I am in at the time I try to stand and move.

She is the one the FBI is looking for. He said he thinks Bruce’s family knows who she is. He said they become alarmigly, agitated, evasive, and violently hostile whenever questioned about her.

If you have any information about my son’s murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

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FAQ: How Did the FBI get involved?

Update added May 31, 2025

Uhm, I am getting some weird messages and I don’t trust things that show up privately, so I’m going to answer publicly, and I assume the one who messaged me will see it, and this should answer their question.

No, I do not have a brown log cabin. What are you talking about? My house at 146 Portland Av, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, was a 9 foot wide by 16 foot long beach hut, originally white with green trim when it was built in 1942, and repainted yellow with brown trim in July 2013 when we got the building permit to add the baby room onto the back. Deranged bigots drove over it with a backhoe August 8, 2013, then the same people returned November 14, 2013 murdered my 8 month old son with a golf club and paralyzed me at the same time. I have been HOMELESS for eleven years now, and am still relearning to walk. I have over THIRTY MILLION in medical bills from my broken spine and physical therapy. So I have not been able to afford to rebuild a house yet. 

You are seeing me out any about with a walker now because yes, I’ve ONLY just STARTED to have enough strength in my legs to walk, but not unaided. I’m still wheelchair bound and bed ridden over 80% of the day, I only have enough strength to use the walker 1 or 2 times a day about 30 minutes each time.

Yes, I am the one who wears the “Middle eastern garb”, we are Gypsies, part Native American Kickapoo Tribe, part Persian&Mongolian Middle Eastern. Yes I ALWAYS wear veils and hijab. No I have never worn pants in my entire life. Yes, I ONLY wear floor length caftan and kimono. Nearly ALL of my cloths are neon pink, neon orange, or bright red, I wear almost nothing else. You ARE going to know it’s me if you see me.

No, I am NOT an animal rights activist, nor a vegan, I wear fur coats and eat seafood and dairy quite regularly.

No, I am not the founder of the Procter and Gamble boycott. The Boycott was founded in 1973, TWO YEARS BEFORE I WAS BORN in 1975. That alone should tell you the person you are talking to is lying to you.

NO, anyone you see wearing pants, wearing “American cloths”, or without their head covered, is NOT me.

No, I do not own ANY of the cars you listed. I own ONLY THREE cars:

1992 Volvo with murals painted on it

1975 Dodge Sportsman painted neon pink and glow in the dark lime green.

1964 Dodge 330 Coronet, painted orange. No, is it not haunted, nor are there demons living in it, nor are there aliens living in it. If you believe that cars can be haunted or if you believe aliens or demons are real, I would suggest you seek a psychiatrist because it sounds like you have schizophrenia. I am getting tired of you clearly deeply mentally disturbed people running around slandering me, my family, my friends, and my cars with your stupid ass retarded rumours about aliens, demons, hauntings, and whatever other crazy ass bull shit you've come up with the slander me and my cars with.

I do not know anyone who owns any of the cars you listed, so I do not know who owns them, and no the woman driving them is NOT me, so you NEED to call the police next time you encounter her and report her for impersonating me.

My NEIGHBOUR at 144 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine did recently build a brown log cabin. But that's my neighbour next door, not me. Is that the brown log cabin you are talking about? That's not mine, that's next door to me.

Coming over here and threatening to "burn down the little brown log cabin while your family is inside" doesn't do a damned bit of good, because it is not MY "little brown log cabin" and the people who live there are NOT my family. You're threatening the wrong damned person you stupid retarded idiot. Plus I don't have a septic tank. I don't even know what you creeps are talking about!

THIS was my house here:

eelkats_house_before_after.jpg


And these are my cars:

eelkat wendy c allen too gay for oob dazzling razzberry transgender tour bus no hurry

Seeing how this message arrived very violently, with a deranged lunatic showing up in my yard in Old Orchard Beach and lashing out at my pink motorhome, on multiple times between April 10, 2025 and May 10, 2025... I'm going to leave this message up on the top of the front page of my site.

I do not know who these people were (it was 4 men in construction/road worker yellow and orange vests - it appeared they were workers from the nearby train track construction that is going on in Biddeford - who decided to trespass in my yard on their lunch breaks - I don't know who these men are, nor do I know what caused them to show up, and most of the things they said are a lot of bizarre gibberish about the brown log cabin at 144 Portland Ave, next door to me, largely accusing me of owning it and owing some man they called "our friend Mark" money for a septic tank.

I also don't know anyone named Mark, but they act like they think I am supposed to know who this "Mark" is that they claim sent them over here. Clearly they have got me mixed up with someone else. But that does not make what they are doing any less terrifying.

My being a mute/none verbal low functioning autistic makes me unable to respond and they do not stay around long enough for me to write out an answer. I do not know how to make them understand they are threatening the wrong person.

Coming over here and threatening to "burn down the little brown log cabin while your family is inside" doesn't do a damned bit of good, because it is not MY "little brown log cabin" and the people who live there are NOT my family. You're threatening the wrong damned person you stupid retarded idiot. Plus I don't have a septic tank. I don't even know what you creeps are talking about!

If you know who these men are, or if you know who this "Mark" person is that they claim sent them over to harass me, please call FBI agent Andy Drewer and tell him everything you know.

please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322





While there are around 20k pages on this website, most of them are blocked from search engines, with only around 800 of them available for appearing in Google/Bing/etc search results. The remainder can only be accessed via the various links found throughout this site. This was done deliberately on my part, and I did it because the bulk of the pages on this website are chapters from 138 novels and 423 novellas, so only the first page of each novel and novella indexed by search engines, and the remainder are linked in order, one page at a time, via clicking "next page" at the end of each. So if you are looking for a specific page from a specific novel, Google can't help you.



Thank you for stopping by and have a nice day! ꧁✨🌸🔮🦄🔮🌸✨꧂

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Wendy Christine Allen 🌸💖🦄 aka EelKat 🧿💛🔮👻
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Wheelchair Fundraiser

@eelkat

i just found out there is yet another bizarre rumour going around. where are these wild rumours coming from? who is starting them? and why?

♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author
@eelkat

since I've been flooded with hundreds of messages the past two weeks asking if I still own "the world's most haunted car", yes, and here it is, filmed today May 18, 2026… but my son Xavier is dead, i am crippled and given that people are AGAIN showing up calling my Dodge "haunted", calling my friend "an alien", calling me "transgender", and spreading wild defamation slander connecting me to Stephen King, I think I need to start taking down the contact information of every blogger, podcaster, youtuber, and social media account spreading these rumors, and sue every single one of them for CAUSING my car to be cut in half May 10, 2010, for CAUSING the backhoe that drove over my house August 8, 2013, for CAUSING my son's murder November 14, 2013, for CAUSING me to be crippled and in a wheelchair November 14, 2013, and for CONTINUING to CAUSE harassers to show up in person to harass me near daily, STILL now in 2026. EVERYONE telling you my car is haunted, telling you my friend is an alien, calling my car "the goldeneagle", calling my friend "Etiole", or trying to connect me or my car to Stephen King, is lying to you. They crippled me when I was 8 months pregnant, and a woman with a golf club, severed my spine and bashed my baby's head in, I spent 9 years relearning to walk, and the FBI is 13 years into the murder investigation and not yet identified the attacker who crippled me and killed my baby, both violently with a golf club and the FBI believes that it is friends and family of the woman who did it, are the ones who started and spread the rumors saying my car is haunted, saying I'm an alien abductee, saying all kinds of similar bs about aliens, ufos, ghosts, witchcraft, demons, and Stephen King connections, even though I don't believe in ghosts, aliens, ufos, demons, and had never heard of Stephen King before 30k of his fans showed up in my yard trying to find my car! FBI believes the backhoe driver and the murderer are the same person and it is a developer who wanted my land and so started the Stephen King, ghost, and alien rumors all in an attempt to drive me off my land, and when it didn't work they drove a backhoe over my house, and when that didn't work they crippled me and killed my son. Why are they doing this? How do I get them to stop?

♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author






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Get an email whenever Wendy Christine Allen 🌸💖🦄 aka EelKat 🧿💛🔮👻 publishes on Medium.

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Do you know who drove this backhoe over my house at 146 Portland Avenue, Old Orchard Beach, Maine on August 8, 2013? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

My house at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, July 4, 2013, photo taken because we had just finished building a baby room on the back. vs My house August 8, 2013, when the same group of people (yes group, the golf club woman was not alone when she attacked November 14, 2013, nor was she alone with her second attack July 2016.) who murdered my son on November 14, 2013 at Southern Maine Community College and crippled me July 26, 2016 at scarborough WalMart,... they arrived the first time with a backhoe on August 8, 2013, that they used to drive over my house, during a time of day that I normally was home asleep... I had to work a different shift at the Waffle Cone Pizza Food Truck at George's Parking Lot by Bill's Pizza at the OBB Peir, that day, otherwise, I too would be at the bottom of a landfill, along with my house and everything I owned that was also in the house. I was 5 months pregnant at the time and have been homeless for just under 14 years, homeless ever since....

... which means it is now only a few weeks from the 14th anniversary of my son's murder. I was 8 month pregnant November 14, 2013, and a student ay SMCC, and coming out of the Buglight Lighthouse art studio after art class, when a still unidentifiedwoman wielding a golf club attacked me, severed my spine, while I was 8 months pregnant, triggered early labour, then killed my son minutes after he was born.

While accusing me of being transgender, screaming "transvestite freak" and "look at that thing, that's Ken's son in a dress"... while I was 8 months pregnant.

eelkats_house_before_after.jpgMy house at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, July 4, 2013, photo taken because we had just finished building a baby room on the back. vs My house August 8, 2013, when the same group of people (yes group, the golf club woman was not alone when she attacked November 14, 2013, nor was she alone with her second attack July 2016.) who murdered my son and crippled me, arrived the first time with a backhoe that they used to drive over my house, during a time of day that I normally was home asleep... I had to work a different shift at the Waffle Cone Pizza Food Truck at George's Parking Lot by Bill's Pizza at the OBB Peir, that day, otherwise, I too would be at the bottom of a landfill, along with my house and everything I owned that was also in the house. I was 5 months pregnant at the time and have been homeless for just under 14 years, homeless ever since.

The backhoe driver returned November 14, 2013, armed with a golf club, used it to break my spine and smash my baby's brains out on the ground

On November 14, 2013, my son was murdered. I was 8 months pregnant, leaving my college classroom, and just getting into my car, when 3 strangers, a man and two women, armed with golf clubs leapt out from behind my car screaming "kill or be killed, kill the transvestite freaks, kill them all before they kill us! look at that thing! That is Ken's son, look at how it's dressed! kill the transvestite freaks! kill or be killed"... while the bald man and the red haired woman chanted this over and over, the blonde woman, lunged with the golf club.

She severed my spine, I am now a quadriplegic, and been paralyzed arms and legs, and in a wheelchair for 13 years now. She broke my hips, my knees, my legs, ruptured most of my discs, and shattered three of my vertebrae so bad that the shards of bone acted like glass and embedded themselves into my spinal column nerve bundle.

The attack also triggered labour.

My son was born in that parking lot, and he lived only a couple of minutes, before the deranged blonde woman, beat his head in and smashed his brains out, with the same golfclub she had just used to sever my spine and leave me crippled for the rest of my life.

Realizing that I was not transgender, and they'd just murdered a baby, the man grabbed the 2 women and forcibly dragged them away to a 4 door white pickup truck, and they left me there to die.

The FBI told me later, that a few weeks before this attack, and transwoman, had murdered a cis woman, in a parking lot, abou 20 miles away from where I was attacked. The FBI, believes that my attackers, had somehow found out I wrote transgender fiction, connecting my real name to my penname, (my father's name is in fact "Ken", and I do have a brother) and believed that I wrote transgender fiction, because I was myself transgender, even though I'm not transgender. The FBI, believes the attackers, thought I was my brother, pretending to be a woman.

The FBI investigation, into my son's murder, has dragged on for 13 years, and still now in 2026, continues on, with the FBI, still not having yet identified my attackers, and only guessing at what their motive was.

Thus we come to 2014, and the full swing change of the series I write. WHY my series, went from just a transman main character living life, to the full blown Mpreg genre series that it now is today.

Before the attack, I had a chance of having a baby. I don't know. And because I'm in America, I'm too old to adopt. You have to be under 45 years old to adopt a baby. That is the law in America. I was informed this, when we tried to adopt, now that my injuries leave me unable to get pregnant a 9th time.

Thus began my obsessively writing, my transman main character, pregnant. Always pregnant now. Every time. Every story. Stories that now fully focus on pregnancy, labour, miscarriages, babies dying, babies living, raising babies... the whole series, since 2014 has devolved into an outright baby obsession.

Meanwhile, reborn baby dolls were suggested to me by my therapist, and have also become a deeply obsessive part of my life. Because 13 years ago my son was murdered minutes after he was born, because a transphobic bigot mistook me for being transgender, I'm STILL in a wheelchair, struggling to relearn to use my arms and legs, now 13 years later, and I'm still DAILY dealing with police officers and FBI agents who while they are trying to find my son's killer, they are also daily reminding me... oh, yeah, my son was murdered, literally ripped out of my belly, by a transphobe. Who still has not been located and walks free to kill again.

The golfclub woman as she looked during the golf club attack at Southern Maine community college November 14, 2013. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026.

Clairescreenshot.pngIf you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

The golfclub woman as she looked during the shopping cart attack at Scarborough WalMart July 26, 2016. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026.

zzzz999ClaireRed2016-screenshotIf you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

The 2nd woman as she looked at both attacks, her hair goes all the way down to her knees. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026.

Kendrascreenshot.pngIf you have any information about the identity of this child murderer's accomplice, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

Do you know who these two woman who crippled me and murdered my baby, at Southern Maine Community College at 10PM on November 14, 2013, are, and what their connection to the backhoe that drove over my house is? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

I am a legally blind quadriplegic, and low verbal, I have also published 138 novels in the last 48 years. It's not as impossible as people think. The problem being blind and quadriplegic, medically have different meanings then how those two words are used medically.

Fewer than 3% of all blind people see nothing. While 97% people who are classified as fully blind are able to see up to two feet in front of them. Legally blind means I can see more then two feet in front of me but not far enough to see twenty feet in front of me. In my case I can see about eight feet.

Quadriplegic, has varying levels, it means having a damaged nerve bundle in the spinal column causing limited mobility of all 4 limbs, (in my case this was done by a women wielding a golf club, who also beat my 8 month infant's head to pulp on the parking lot tarmak, at the same time she severed my spine with the same golf club; both on November 14, 2013; the FBI investigation into my son's murder and my being crippled has gone on now for 13 years, a few weeks away from 14 years now, and the FBI has still not identified the killer or her motive). Contrary to popular misconception, quadriplegic does NOT mean ZERO movement, it means means limited movement, specifically in means unable to lift arms over head, unable to grip fingers around objects to pick them up, and unable to stand for more then 5 minutes to a time. Because there are so many thousands of nerves in each limb it is actually very rare for there to be 100% no movement, but how much, and to what extent varies by patent depending upon the specific point of injury to the spinal column.

Meaning typing is still possible for over 60% of all quadriplegics.

In my case, it was the lower spine that was severed, cutting off completly my ability to move my right leg, leaving limited feeling in my left leg, and an ability to stand but not walk, with crutches, for the first 9 years. I regained enough nerve growth in my legs by the 9th year to be able to take ten or twelve steps allowing me to get out of bed for the first time since the golf club attack; This in turn lead to me being able to start using a wheelchair, as I was able to sit upright for the first time as well.

Because the shattered vertebrae bone fragments are broken off completly and embedded into the nerve bundle just above my tailbone, doctors were saying I would never walk again, but now at 13 years, I am able to push mu wheelchair like a walker, a distance of almost a thousand steps a day. Though doctors are still doubtful I will ever walk "normally" again, I have proven them wrong, when their said 13 years ago, that I would never walk again at all.

But because of the placement of the damage to my spine, regaining hand use, was always thought possible, it was just a matter of waiting long enough for nerve regrowth, along side daily finger exercises. I was able to continue writing, after becoming quadriplegic, because I still have use of my right thumb, and 2 fore figures of my right hand. And can type 90 words per minute with those 3 fingers.

I however have no wrist strength, elbow strength, or shoulder strength, so I am not able to form a fist, or lift objects, or brush my hair, or my teeth, all thing I have to have my caretaker do. But, those things are not needed for typing. Unfortunately, my pinky and ring fingers are "nerve dead" and drag over the keyboard, and cause horrific spelling errors and typos, which are incredibly frustrating to deal with.

Unfortunately trying to edit errors myself, just makes the errors worse, because those same two fingers drag over the keyboard yet again. Prior to the golf club attack, I rarely had spelling errors; now I got more spelling errors then someone is learning English as second language. Editing is a challenge, that I've had to accept, I simply can not do myself, and I have to hire several editors to help with that.

Low verbal means sounds can still be made, sounds that software programs like Dragon can be trained to recognize and translate, and type into full words. More then half my novels were typed with this method.

I still have a long ways to go before I am anything close to being able to do the things I could do before the golf club woman beat my baby's brains out and shattered my spine. And you know what's more frustrating then how slow mu medical progression has been? The fact that it's been 13 years and the police and FBI are still coming up at dead ends as to who the woman who murdered my baby was, or why she even did it.

My son's 14th birthday is only a few weeks away, but he didn't even get to live long enough to celebrate his 1st birthday, I don't even know why. And I can't wait to regain my ability to walk again, because regaining my ability to walk, means gaining the ability to go outside and start looking for my son's murderer myself instead of sitting at home trapped in a wheelchair waiting for the police and FBI to to find her. So, writing isn't a big priority for me anymore. I only write now, as a way to exercise my hands, in between relearning to walk.

Never let a disability stop you. Plenty of writers, artists, athletes, do not let either blindness, speech impediments, or limited mobility hold then back from perusing their careers.

Do you know who these two woman who crippled me and murdered my baby, at Southern Maine Community College at 10PM on November 14, 2013, are, and what their connection to the backhoe that drove over my house is? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

Important:

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