Congratulations!
You have reached Maine's largest and most trafficked website.
As of February 2021, we are now getting up to 7 MILLION visits per day!
This is the home page of
Maine author, artist, Voodoo Priestess, Gypsy Queen, and art car designer:
EelKat Wendy Christine Allen.
This website started in 1996 and is updated, edited, and added to daily.
As of 2021 it has more than 10,000 pages. However, only around 2,000 pages are indexed by search engines (robot blockers and/or passwords, prevent the rest from being findable by Google/Bing/Yahoo/etc.). Around 8,000 pages can only be accessed by clicking on direct links to them. The links are found on other pages on this site. Confusing? Perhaps. But whenever one of those difficult to find 8,000 pages gets traffic, I know that you are VERY dedicated in reading what I wrote or doing some stalker level digging to reach those search engine inaccessible pages and I'd rather not waste my time writing stuff for uninterested parties, plus it's fascinating to see how deep some people are willing dig to find every last word I wrote.
I published my first novel in 1978. Since than I have published 138 novels, 30 non-fiction books, 2,000+ short stories, a dozen plays, a few comic book scripts for Disney's Uncle Scrooge and Donald Duck comics, a few dozen novellas, and 10,000+ non-fiction articles.
I am asexual and famous for 4 decades of writing 100% sexless stories, laced in extreme blood-gore-and-violence. But in spite of that, in recent years, most people classify me as an Erotica author. I don't know why, as I've never written Erotica or even any sex scenes, and as I am a nun, raised as such from the age of 3, I wouldn't even know how to write sex or Erotica. If you came here looking for sex, BDSM, Erotica, or Dominatrix's, please return to whomever sent you and tell them to burn in Hell where their immoral ass belongs. Also, do tell me their name so I can put a curse on them, so they will never enjoy sex ever again, to punish them for spreading lies about me and connecting my name to anything related to sex at all. I find sex vile and despicable and want no part of your perverse degradation near me.
All of my fiction works are about Alien Elf Wizards who live in Old Orchard Beach, Maine. All of my non-fiction works are about the history of Maine, it's Gypsy Clans, and most especially Old Orchard Beach the town which was settled and founded by my family.
Most of these pages answer reader questions on the worldbuilding, character creating, plotting, writing, editing, and publishing process of my work.
Others are on the history of my people, The Gypsies of Maine, our culture, our lifestyle, our cars, and our religion.
The rest of the pages are daily updates of the terrorist attacks by Maine's White Supremacists on my non-white family, including updates of the FBI investigation of the April 10, 2015 kidnapping and murder of my children.
The bulk of this website is a massive database of how-to articles for anyone looking to write and publish Dark Fantasy & Weird Horror.
Some stuff is indexed. Most stuff isn't. The links below take you to the most popular/most visited pages. Each of them contains more links to more pages. That should get you started.
Enjoy your stay!
| Home | Site Index | Top 100 Pages | Search| About |
| Keywords & Pigeons: Or The Secret To Why I Get 7million Views Per Day and You Don't|
| The Adventures of The Pink Necromancer: Quaraun The Insane |
| Meet Quaraun | Meet BoomFuzzy | Meet GhoulSpawn | FAQs |
| Character motivation for becoming a drug dealer? | How To Stay Motivated To Write |
| Motivations of Super Villains of Organizations That Control The World |
| Age Difference In Marriage: The Fiction VS The Reality | Writing Polygamous and Polyamorous Characters |
|Giving Your Characters Flaws and Goals | Writing Taboos | Travel & World Size Fantasy Worldbuilding |
| Slice of Life Literary Fantasy - Soap Opera Drama of the Fantasy Genre |
| Question Everything Before Putting It In Your World |
| Americans Don't Want Diverse Books | Why Do Americans Hate Black People? (2016 ed.) |
| Writing Christian Characters Accurately To Real World Christians | Writing Prompt Syndrome |
| How long does it take to reach 1667 words? & 50k in one day - is it possible? | How Many Pages Per Day? |
| How to increase word count without making a story boring? | Your Population: World Building Writing Prompts |
| Overactive Reader Imaginations: Seeing Things I Did Not Write|
| Wait, why is Quaraun Rated M If It's Not Erotica and Contains No Sex Scenes? |
| Comparing The Wild Sex Crazed Rumors About Who I Am & What I Write, To Asexual I Actually Am & The Sexless Novels I Actually Write |
| BDSM? Dominatrix? Erotica? Boy Are You In The Wrong Place! |
| Wait, You DON'T Write Sex, But I Thought... | A Look At Twitch's Witch Hunting Culture |
| But Avallac'h... A Look At How Sex Crazed Fans Can Destroy Lives, When They See Sex In Places It Never Was |
|
| Who Is Avallac'h? | Ciri or Lara? | | But Ciri is The Chosen One, She's Like Jesus! | | The Avallac'h Playthrough Challenge | |
| Mistakes People Make While Playing Witcher 3| | Why Americans Should NOT Read The Witcher Novels | | How can you like Avallac'h? He's a Polygamist! | |
| How Does a Destitute Homeless Man Get Accused of Being Wealthy?| Twitch Follower vs Viewer Counts |
| I Came Here Looking For Vampire Strippers, But Than I Found Out You Were An Asexual Catholic Nun |
| Can I Visit You? | The Most Bizarre Question I've Ever Been Asked & The Answer You Didn't Want To Hear |
| How Did The FBI Get Involved? | What Is The Mafia Connection? | What Religion Are You? |
| Meet The Scottish Travellers | Stephen King's Thinner Gypsies - The Complete Interviews |
| Amphibious Aliens | Meet The Real Christine: The World's Most Haunted Car |
Did you come here from Tom Addam's website?
Are you looking for the specific page he reviewed?
If so, it's this one:
Noses, Penis Piercings, And Rapunzel Hair
aka
Flamboyant Nipples & Wizard Testicles
Writing Character Descriptions
A Very Detailed Look At How I Write The
(Very X-Rated & Often Controversial)
Character Descriptions of The Quaraun Series
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Quaraun The Insane:
Is Too Gay For The Family Friendly Town of Old Orchard Beach...
Did You Know That?
Seeing How "The Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach" Court Order Requires Me To Put This Notice In The Front Of The Novels,
I Assume It Also Requires I Put It In Front of Novel Excerpts Posted Online As Well, so, Here It Is...
Enjoy The Stupidity That Is The
Town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine,
Where I Am Deemed,
In Their Words:
"Too Gay For The Family Friendly Town of Old Orchard Beach"
Because I'm The Author of The Quaraun Series.
Please Note:
The Quaraun Series Is SplatterPunk Horror Gorn Rated M18+ for extreme graphic violence, grizzly depictions of suicide, and you must be 18 or older to buy it if you live in America, Japan, Australia, Germany, or any other country with government laws regulating explicit media
Why is the Quaraun Series Rated M18+?
I repeat, there is a ...
MASSIVE TRIGGER WARNING
for the Quaraun series, as it is 200+ volumes, 8 million+ words of steady, endless, non-stop suicide, suicide references, depression, and suicidal characters attempting suicide in nearly every chapter of every volume!
Don't be fooled by the pink covers. The Quaraun series has won awards for being among the darkest novels ever published.
It's one of the few series so dark, so disturbing, so gory, so bloody, and so focused on putting suicide in your face that...
...on January 6, 2016 the American government has issued a court order declaring I was required to put M18+ book rating on the cover, as well as banned 27 volumes of the Quaraun series from being sold in America.
If you have any questions regarding this court order issued by the Old Orchard Beach, Maine Town Hall, an division of the American Government, which violates the first amendment, where we are clearly told the government can not censor freedom of speech...
please head to the State of Maine, Biddeford District Court and ask for copies of
Docket #BDDC-PA-2015-00574 and CV-15-58/CV-15-59
the Alfred Superior Court Docket #CV-15-299
and the Portland Superior Law Court Docket #YOR-15-253
Additionally, you can find more information by going to the Old Orchard Beach Police Department and requesting copies of ALL police reports made in regards to 144, 146, and 146a Portland Avenue, from 2001 to 2016 (approximately 300 reports).
INTRODUCTION TO THE SERIES
The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane
(Added March 29, 2016)
by
EelKat Wendy Christine Allen
~o0o~
UPDATE: The Old Orchard Beach Town Hall has handed me a court order requiring I place a warning in my books, warning you that they have their heads stuck up their asses, I mean, warning you that this book was written by a non-white transgender author and contains non-white, LGBTQ characters, which the straight, white citizens of Old Orchard Beach find offensive because they never before took their heads out of their asses long enough to notice that there exist in this world non-white people and gay transgender men. The HORROR I have forced them to discover, when they took their heads out of their asses long enough to discover a non-white, transgender author has lived in their town since 1975!
As of January 4, 2016 ALL gay, transgender, and non-white authors, living in the white power, gay-hating town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine are now required to add a warning to the front of their books, warning readers that this book is a vile, evil, perversion of their senses because it contains non-white, minority, transgender, and or gay characters who by their very existence according to the white power, gay hating residents of the 99.9% white town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine do not deserve to live and should not be included as characters in books.
Because I am a vile, evil, non-white, transgender author who lives in Old Orchard Beach, Maine, I am now required by court order to place warning in my books, to warn readers that this book was written by a vile, evil, non-white, transgender author and there for may contain references to my vile, evil, non-white, transgender lifestyle, including to, shock, and horror, ACTUALLY CONTAIN
....
Non-white characters
oh, my, my, my, how evil of me to consider writing a book with a person of colour in it. And even worse, is the fact that...wait for it...
I've gone so far as to allow gay transvestite characters to be in my books.
How shockingly evil of me to offend the citizens of Old Orchard Beach, by including gay and transgender characters in my book. I have forced them to have to discover the horror that there exists non-white people in our town, and worse, have made them suffer the horrors of learning that LGBTQ citizens have the right to live. How evil of me. To punish me for the publication of the book you are now reading, they filled my home with sewage 3 feet deep and cut the heads off of my cats, drove a backhoe over my house, then beat me up and left me paralyzed for 5 months, during which time they hacked my online accounts of Kboards, NaNoWriMo, Twitter and other places and impersonated me, posting lots of shitty crap to try to discredit me and destroy my reputation. If you are one of my long time readers and followers, you no dought saw what transpired on KBoards and NaNoWriMo (I did not see it and still do not know what happened, seeing how I was in the hospital dying, while the hacker was taking over my accounts online.)
18 months later I am out of the wheelchair, relearning to walk and still refusing to unpublish my evil books containing non-white gay men and so now they have gotten a court order demanding the warning you are now reading, be placed in this book, because the Old Orchard Beach Town Hall (the plaintiff named on the court order – YES – an actual United States Government Organization has issued this civil rights violating court order, in blatant disregard to federal laws) believes that non-whites and gays and transgender citizens are so evil that they QUOTE “ought to be shot in the head” UNQUOTE.
The book you are now holding contains non-white characters, of the same vile, evil non-white race as the non-white author who wrote this book and because I am not white and have chosen to include non-white characters in this book, I am now required by court order to warn my non-white readers that this book was written by evil, vile non-white me and contains evil, vile non-white characters that will offend your holier then though piece of shit white asses. There, I am now in compliance with the white power, gay hating town of Old Orchard Beach's, civil rights violating court order. White trash has now been warned that non-white trash exists in this book.
The book you are now holding contains LGBTQ characters, of the same vile, evil LGBTQ existence as the LGBTQ who wrote this book and because I am LGBTQ and have chosen to include LGBTQ characters in this book, I am now required by court order to warn my LGBTQ readers that this book was written by evil, vile LGBTQ me and contains evil, vile LGBTQ characters that will offend your holier then though piece of shit straight asses. There, I am now in compliance with the white power, gay hating town of Old Orchard Beach's, civil rights violating court order. Straight trash has now been warned that non-straight trash exists in this book.
If you have any questions regarding this court order which violates the civil rights of people of colour, minority races, and LGBTQ citizens, please head to the State of Maine, Biddeford District Court and ask for copies of
Docket #BDDC-PA-2015-00574 and CV-15-58/CV-15-59
the Alfred Superior Court Docket #CV-15-299
and the Portland Superior Law Court Docket #YOR-15-253
Additionally, you can find more information by going to the Old Orchard Beach Police Department and requesting copies of ALL police reports made in regards to 144, 146, and 146a Portland Avenue, from 2001 to 2016 (approximately 300 reports).
Note, that the court order includes 4 interesting facts:
1: It states that transgender people in Old Orchard Beach are not allowed to own cats; the Town Manager confiscated my cats on this basis (the judge granted this). 140 families in Old Orchard Beach had a grand total of more then 500 cats taken from them via this court order. Many of those cats are being returned to their owners, one head nailed to their door at a time.
2: It states that transgender vehicles are not allowed in the town of Old Orchard Beach and specifically that The Transgender Awareness Tour Bus be removed from the "perimeters of the family friendly town of Old Orchard Beach" (the judge denied this)
3: It states that transgender authors, not be allowed to publish books featuring transgender characters, and contains a list of books, deemed "Too gay for Old Orchard Beach" that the Town Hall requested be removed from publication. The judge ordered the removal and unpublication of 27 of my books, and that the rest have this warning placed in them.
4: That LGBTQ, non-white, non-Christians, and Muslims, not be allowed to set foot in Old Orchard Beach (with one motel owner in particular claiming his right to confiscate the homes, property, and business of some 140 families in Old Orchard Beach, by right of his desire to put condominiums on each of their properties. Interestingly, this is the same man who drove a backhoe over my house in 2013.) Part of this was passed, with the judge ordering LGBTQ families not allowed to set foot in their own homes (not rentals or apartments - houses they owned outright and owed no taxes or mortgages on, with 140 families be forced out of their homes on January 4, 2016. He dropped the request to confiscate homes of LGBTQ citizens when FBI Agent Andy Drewer Arrived to investigate him and the 5 businesses he owns, for his connection to the bomb that blew up my house in 2006.) Three court houses later a different judge overruled the first judge's civil rights violating order, with LGBTQ citizens being allowed to go home October 18, 2016, after 10 months of living in their cars.
Want to know the names, phone numbers, business locations, and home addresses of all the cat murdering, transphobic, gay-hating, white powered people who are trying to ban all LGBTQ and non-white citizens from Old Orchard Beach? Then go to those 3 court houses and request to get copies of all 700 pages of The Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach Court Case of Old Orchard Beach vs Wendy Christine Allen.
All names and contact information of all the white power, gay hating town hall officials, police officers, public works workers, motels, businesses, motel owners, business owners, and the KKK's own lawyers, behind this introduction now required to being added to books containing gay or non-white characters can be found in those court orders and police reports, here after collectively known as “The Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach Court Case” or #TooGayForOOB for short.
In those court dockets you will find more then 700 pages of utterly fascinating civil rights violating, animal abusing, hate crime glorifying, anti-gay, white power, transphobic lunacy. I highly recommend you get copies of those court dockets and see for yourself, the REALITY of how utterly insane the gay hating, white power mentality of Old Orchard Beach, really is.
Or if you want to meet me at Staples, and are willing to pay however much it costs to have 700 pages of copies made, you can get copies made of my copy of the court order.
Happy reading.
Welcome to Maine, where love wins, everywhere, except in the white power, gay-hating town of Old Orchard Beach. TIP: If you are looking for a great fun summer family vacation spot this summer: avoid the transphobic, animal abusing, gay hating, white power town of Old Orchard Beach. This town is only family friendly, IF your family qualifies as a “real family” which to them means: you are white, Christian, and have no connections to LGBTQ people whatsoever. Save your hard earned money and DO NOT come to Old Orchard Beach this summer. Don't bother wasting your hard earned money on the transphobic, animal abusing, gay hating, white power trash that thinks it's okay to discriminate against people based on race, gender, religion, or colour.
There. Now I am in compliance with the court order and you, my dear reader have been warned that this book was written by evil, vile, perverted non-white, non-straight little old me and contains non-white, gay, transvestite characters. Can I ask: Have you EVER seen a book ANYWHERE that the author's town required the author to place a warning in the book, for ANY reason? Can anyone say RIDICULOUS? Yes, the town of Old Orchard Beach is being utterly ridiculous. I think they forgot that Old Orchard Beach is a town in America and not it's own country.
So, if you are a transphobic, gay-hating, white power person who is offended by the existence of transvestites, gays, non-Christians, people of colour, and other things that tick off white power mentalities, then you probably want to avoid these books.
For everybody else who isn't a white power, transphobic, gay-hating jerk with their head stuck up their own white, Christian ass: I hope you enjoy reading these books as much as I have enjoyed writing them. And for those of you who don't enjoy this sort of book, well, enjoy those knee-jerks, I'm told you guys should be expecting quite a few of them.
~EK
End of introduction.
Please Note:
The Quaraun Series Is SplatterPunk Horror Gorn Rated M18+ for extreme graphic violence, grizzly depictions of suicide, and you must be 18 or older to buy it if you live in America, Japan, Australia, Germany, or any other country with government laws regulating explicit media
Why is the Quaraun Series Rated M18+?
I repeat, there is a ...
MASSIVE TRIGGER WARNING
for the Quaraun series, as it is 200+ volumes, 8 million+ words of steady, endless, non-stop suicide, suicide references, depression, and suicidal characters attempting suicide in nearly every chapter of every volume!
Don't be fooled by the pink covers. The Quaraun series has won awards for being among the darkest novels ever published.
It's one of the few series so dark, so disturbing, so gory, so bloody, and so focused on putting suicide in your face that...
...on January 6, 2016 the American government has issued a court order declaring I was required to put M18+ book rating on the cover, as well as banned 27 volumes of the Quaraun series from being sold in America.
If you have any questions regarding this court order issued by the Old Orchard Beach, Maine Town Hall, an division of the American Government, which violates the first amendment, where we are clearly told the government can not censor freedom of speech...
please head to the State of Maine, Biddeford District Court and ask for copies of
Docket #BDDC-PA-2015-00574 and CV-15-58/CV-15-59
the Alfred Superior Court Docket #CV-15-299
and the Portland Superior Law Court Docket #YOR-15-253
Additionally, you can find more information by going to the Old Orchard Beach Police Department and requesting copies of ALL police reports made in regards to 144, 146, and 146a Portland Avenue, from 2001 to 2016 (approximately 300 reports).
And yet...
The First Amendment to the United States Constitution prohibits the making of any law respecting an establishment of religion, impeding the free exercise of religion, abridging the freedom of speech, infringing on the freedom of the press, interfering with the right to peaceably assemble or prohibiting the petitioning for a governmental redress of grievances. It was adopted on December 15, 1791, as one of the ten amendments that constitute the Bill of Rights.
The Town of Old Orchard Beach is a United States Government organization. By banning books and forcing their unpublication, they have gone against The First Amendment to the United States Constitution.
No law can give or take away the choice to commit suicide.
- Maggie Gallagher
The homosexual community has more acceptance in America than it ever has, and the suicide rate is as high as it's always been.
- Randall Terry
Hamsa
Eye of The Grigoi
Eye of the Watchers
Eye of God
Hand of God
Eye of Protection
Evil Eye
Gypsy Curse
Art Images Provided By Amazon
I Will Use The Rest Of This Page To Index
The Novel Excerpts Found On This Site
It has been brought to my attention, by several fans, that you have read all the currently published novels and are eagerly awaiting publication of the rest of the series. However, life being what it is, the town of Old Orchard Beach being what it is, and my health being what it is... publication of the novels got put on hold with an entire 2 years passing with no new novels published.
As I have many chapters of each volume finished, and each story can be read on their own in any order, without continuing one to the next, I have come to the conclusion that the best way to sait your appetite for more Quaraun, in between the publication of the finished novels, the best thing to do therefore is to simply publish the chapters that are finished here on my site, to give you something to read while waiting for each novel to be finished.
Please note that while not "true" erotica, the Quaraun series is sold as "Adult Entertainment" and is not intended for readers under the age of 18.
The Quaraun Series Is Yaoi (Gay Porn). While not "true Erotica" it is considered by most readers to be "Erotica" of some shape or form, due to the graphic nature of the sex content.
Most of the graphic stuff will not be found posted online, you'll have to read the novel for those scenes. While the excerpt below likely does not contain the stuff listed above, know that the novel it came from does, so do not buy the novel if any of those things bother you.
The Series Is Psychedelic Unicorn Porn & Contains Masochistic Drug Addicted Transvestite Twinkie Uke Elves Having Sex with Sadistic Drug Dealing UnDead Seme Unicorns
You must be 18 or older to buy the novels this excerpt comes from.
Banned By The Old Orchard Beach Town Hall,
For Being Gay Erotica
BUT...
The Books Are Not Erotica
AND
Quaraun Is Not Gay...
If you go to GoodReads you'll find that actually gay men who've read the book, hate the book, because Quaraun is NOT GAY and they had bought the book, based off the reviews written by local Christians who had said he was gay.
Yes, that's true, if you actually read the book, you quickly discover that Quaraun is not gay.
Right in the opening scene, of Night of the Screaming Unicorn, the story starts out with Quaraun talking to himself about his dead wife. Yes, wife. Yes. The man has a wife. In fact, he has four wives, in addition to 36 other female lovers whom he never married but had children with. Quaraun has 8 children that he acknowledges, and at least 36 more that he tries to pretend are not his.
Yes, this man with his 4 wives and 36 lovers whom he got pregnant, is just soooooo gay.
The Christians who gave it bad reviews because it's "gay", inspired lots of ACTUALLY gay men to buy the book and read it, resulting in, bad reviews by them, when they realized, OMG! Quaraun isn't gay at all!
To which some then say: "But Unicorn...."
Yes. Unicorn is gay. Unicorn is gay and he is obsessed with Quaraun, who is not gay.
Unicorn is also a rapist, a pedophile, a stalker, a murderer, a sadist, a dictator, and an extremely violent abuser. Unicorn has to have everything his way or no way and he'll beat to a pulp anyone who challenges him.
Quaraun submits to sex with Unicorn, because Quaraun is scared of Unicorn, not because Quaraun is gay.
Every sex scene you find between Quaraun and Unicorn, is a rape scene, with Unicorn viciously attacking Quaraun and raping him.
When I keep saying over and over again that:
QUARAUN IS NOT GAY
QUARAUN IS A RAPE VICTIM
I mean exactly what I said:
QUARAUN IS NOT GAY
QUARAUN IS A RAPE VICTIM
When I keep saying over and over again that:
THE QUARAUN SERIES IS NOT EROTICA
BECAUSE QUARAUN IS A RAPE VICTIM
AND RAPE IS NOT EROTIC
I mean exactly what I said:
THE QUARAUN SERIES IS NOT EROTICA
BECAUSE QUARAUN IS A RAPE VICTIM
AND RAPE IS NOT EROTIC
Read More Here On The Theme of Suicide, Rape, and Abuse In The Quaraun series
My Book Is Gay Erotica? Really?
I'm The Author... So How Come I Didn't Know I Was Writing Gay Erotica?
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