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The Summoner of Darkness:

Meeting Mallac

(Bizarro Dark Fantasy Yaoi free to read online)

(No clue what chapter it is, it's anyone's guess; I did not chapter this novel, yet. You are seeing the pre-publication draft edition of it here, which is not yet fully edited. The published print edition may be different.)



The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane
Volume 11 of 130

The Summoner of Darkness:

Meeting Mallac

(Bizarro Dark Fantasy Yaoi free to read online)

(No clue what chapter it is, it's anyone's guess; I did not chapter this novel, yet. You are seeing the pre-publication draft edition of it here, which is not yet fully edited. The published print edition may be different.)


Please Note: The Quaraun Series Is Rated M18+ and you must be 18 or older to buy it.

Most pages on EelKat.com are about writing Yaoi, and thus probably is NSFW; reader discretion is advised.

Why is the Quaraun Series Rated M18+?
















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The Summoner of Darkness is

an Epic Length Novel of more than 300,000 words

(500+ paperback pages)

This chapter is...

Word count: 5,477

or

17 paperback pages.



The Summoner of Darkness:

Meeting Mallac

(Bizarro Dark Fantasy Yaoi free to read online)

(No clue what chapter it is, it's anyone's guess; I did not chapter this novel, yet. You are seeing the pre-publication draft edition of it here, which is not yet fully edited. The published print edition may be different.)

<<< Previous Chapter:

~o0o~ Chapter  ~o0o~

Unicorn called for the waiter to bring Quaraun a jug of ale, then went back to his argument with ZooLock. Quaraun ate quietly as he listened to the Phooka and the Thullid argue. Quaraun was so intently listening to his companions argument that he did not notice the young human soldier stride up to their table and stare intently at the three non-humans. Quaraun, as he did in every tavern, was not sitting in any of the chairs, stools, or benches provided by the tavern, but rather was sitting on an ornate, gold gilded, throne, covered with pink velvet cushions.

“Why are you sitting on a throne?” The solider asked.

“I'm a king.”

“Not a queen?”

“I'm the Grand High Emperor of the Triple Planets.”

“You're what?”

“I'm the...”

“You're hair's touching the floor,” the young man said not letting Quaraun finish.

“Yes. I know. I have not cut my hair in three hundred years.”

“Are those real?”

The Human reached out and pulled on Quaraun's foot long ears.

“Stop that!”

Quaraun slapped the Human.

“How dare you touch me!” Quaraun screamed hysterically. ”No body touches me! I do not like being touched.”

“Are you an Elf?”

Quaraun was still screaming and not listening to the soldier.

Unicorn looked up at the young man and exclaimed: "Oh my! A tasty looking human. Look how him justs, brings hisself right over to us table for me to eats him!" 

"You are not eating the humans," Quaraun scolded.

"Oh pooh! Suck a cock dick damn it!"" 

“Do you eat Humans?” The wide eyed Human asked.

"I'm sorry," Quaraun said to the young man."He's a Faerie, their ways are different." 

"I've never seen any of you before," the soilder said.

"No," Quaraun answered. "We just arrived. We only stopped for a meal and a place to sleep for a few hours. I hurt my leg outside of town, otherwise we wouldn't have stopped at all. I need to rest before we can continue. We will be on our way once we are done eating. Except he's never done eating, so we could be here a while."

The man looked around the room nervously, as though hoping to not be overheard, then pulled a chair up to their table and whispered to Quaraun: "You're new in town, right?”

“Yes. I just said as much.”

“That means you didn't commit the murders." 

"Murders?" Quaraun asked.

"Sssshhhhhh. Not so loud." The man looked around the room, then whispered: "I need your help." 

"Our help?" 

"Yes."

"You don't even know who we are." 

"I know you are not murderers." 

Unicorn burst out laughing. He laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed and then fell out of his chair and continued laughing while laying on the floor.

"What's wrong with him?" The man asked.

"He's a Faerie," Quaraun said. "They do that." 

"Oh." The man watched the Faerie as he continued to lay on the floor laughing uncontrollably.

"You were saying you needed our help?" Quaraun asked.

"Yes."

Quaraun kicked Unicorn. 

"Stop it," he said to the Phooka. 

Unicorn stopped laughing for a few seconds, and then started laughing again. 

"Is he all right?" 

"Oh, yes, he's fine. Faeries are very emotional creatures. Ignore him and continue, please."

"My name is Mallac. I am the chief of the Burgermeister's guards and he has assigned me to solve the mystery of the recent murders, but I'm no detective. I don't know what I'm doing, I don't know who I can trust, I need help..." 

Unicorn sat up and pulled himself back up into his chair and said: "Un ya t'inks we looks likes, we be good upstanding, trustworthy, un-cannibalistic, non-murderous citizens willing for to helps ya, eh?" 

"Well...uhm...uhm...uhm..."

"What be tripping ya up, dat we is cannibalistic or dat we is murderers?" 

Mallac stared bugged eyed at Unicorn then sent a questioning glance back to Quaraun.

"Faerie," Quaraun said. "They say the first thing that comes out of their mouths, without stopping to think about what it is or how it sounds. Please, ignore him and continue with your story."

Quaraun popped a truffle into his pink painted mouth and waited for Mallac to continue.

"I don't know who I can trust and I've heard Elves are compassionate and willing to help those in need." 

Unicorn started laughing again.

"Quaraun? Compassionate? Ha ha! Un willing to help! Ho ho, heh, ha!"

Mallac turned back to Quaraun. 

"Faerie," Quaraun said.

"You are an Elf aren't you?" 

"Yes. I am an Elf, but he's right. Faerie or no. You shouldn't trust strangers, not even an Elf. Especially not me."

"Why not?" 

"Why not trust strangers or why not trust Elves?" 

“Why not trust Elves.”

“There do exist cannibalistic murdering Elves.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Have you ever met one?”

“You're talking to one.”

“I am?”

“Yes.” 

“Where is it?”

Quaraun blinked and waited for the Human's brain to register what he had said, but, Humans, being the idiots they are, this one being more idiotic then most, never once thought that Quaraun might possibly be referring to himself. Quaraun popped another truffle into his mouth, then straightened a few of the many rings that sat sparkling on his fingers.

"You don't know who I am do you?" Quaraun finally asked.

"No. Should I?"

"I don't know. Soilders tend to be the ones who put up the wanted posters and read the Guild's most wanted of the week messages."

"Yes, but..."

"You'd think if any one knew a pink robed, Moon Elf wizard, it'd be a Burgermiester's guard, right?"

"But..."

"You've never heard of The Pink Necromancer before have you?"

"No. Should I have?"

"You don't ever read those wanted posters you put up around the town then?"

"No. Why would I? It's not like anyone new ever comes to these parts. We're East. Everyone is heading West."

"That's true."

“We don't get many Elves around here.”

“Obviously.”

“We do have a gang half-Elves in town. Strange men. Wizards. Keep to themselves. Live in that creepy tower outside of town.”

“Tower?”

"But you are an Elf?" 

"I am a Moon Elf. You mentioned the tower..." 

"Oh good. I wasn't sure. I'd never seen an Elf like you before." 

"Because he's a Moon Elf," ZooLock pointed out. "Last of his kind."

"Yes I heard...uhm...her...him?" Mallac leaned closer to Quaraun. "I'm sorry. Are you a male Elf?" 

“Do you think I'm a male Elf?”

"Yes. Uhm. I think. I thought you were a female when I started talking to you. I mean you look like... but your voice, you don't... you sound like... "

“I'm a male Elf with a female Jellyfish living in my brain. The Elf in me died centuries ago. The Jelly controls my body. I have the mind, spirit, and soul of a female. I just have the misfortune of living in a male body.”

“You're insane aren't you?”

“Yes, actually I am. I'm Quaraun the Insane, that's what everyone calls me these days. It's the name they put on the wanted posters. 'Quaraun the Insane: World's Most wanted Criminal. Extremely dangerous. Aproach with caution. Neceromancer. Always wears pink.” 

“So are you male or female?”

“Does it matter?”

“Uuuhhmm... Why wouldn't it?”

“The only person who needs to know what my biological gender is, is the person I choose to sleep with. It only matters what sex I am to some one who wants to fuck me. And then it only matters if I actually want them to fuck me. He's the only the one allowed to fuck me.” Quaraun pointed to Unicorn. “And so he's the only one who needs to know what gender I physically am.”

“And that would be?”

“You want me to lift up my skirts and show you what I got between my legs?”

"Oh, uhm.. no...I thought... I'm sorry.... I didn't mean... I'm... I... I've never seen an Elf like you before. But the way you're dressed and the make up and jewellery, you look..." 

"No, you were right to think I was a female...I do not dress as a male."

"Oh, well... uhm...why do you dress like a woman? If you don't mind my asking." 

"I am a wizard of the Di'Jinn order. This is how we dress. We reject the gender of our birth, to embody the soul of both genders." 

“I don't understand.”

“I'm a Thullid.”

“A what?”

“THAT is a Thullid.”

Quaraun pointed to ZooLock, who was just then using his longest tentacles to steal food off the plates of the next table.

“That's one of those squid headed Chaos Demons.”

“Yes. They are called Thullids.”



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“You don't have a squid head.”

“No. Not all Thullids do. There are different types of Thullids. Some are Squids. Some are Octopus. Some are Cuttlefish. Some are Sea Cucumbers. Some are Lobsters. Some are Eels. I'm a Jellyfish. I will never get any bigger then the size of an apple, and therefore I will never grow large enough to have to hatch out of my host's body. I will forever look like an Elf. I will never have a Squid head. I'm not a Squid Thullid. I'm a Jelly Thullid. I am beautiful pink Jellyfish with long feathery purple ruffled tentacles...”

"So, you ARE insane.”

Quaraun sighed and went back to eating melba toast.

“But, you're a wizard, right? You said something about being a Genie."

"DiJinn. Yes," Quaraun sounded annoyed at having been interrupted. "I am a wizard of the Di'Jinn order..."

"So you ARE a wizard."

"I'm a Di'Jinn wizard."

"How is that differant from any other wizard?" 

"It make him a elitist, egotistical wizard," Unicorn chirped.

"Will you go turn yourself into a Unicorn, run into a tree, and knock yourself out for a while?" Quaraun said to Unicorn.

Unicorn simply raised his mug, saluted the Elf and went back to drinking.

"He's a Moon Elf," ZooLock said to Mallac.

"Yes, I heard him..." Mallac started to answer.

"Why are you drinking that?" Quaraun demanded of Unicorn. "You're a Lich. You can't get drunk and you know it."

"No," Unicorn laughed. "But it annoyances ya un dat do be fun."

"Why can't he get drunk?" Mallac asked.

"He's dead!" Quaraun screamed.

"Dead?" 

"Yes."

"I thought you said he was a Faerie."

"He is a Faerie."

"But you just said he was dead."

"Yes.”

"I think I'm confused."

"Of course you are. You're a Human. I'm a Necromancer. He's a dead Faerie. What is there to be confused about?" 

"But he's...he's...he's...uhm..."

"What?" Unicorn smiled trying not to start laughing again. "I sitting here, talking, laughing, drinking, not rotting in the grave being eat up by maggots wherest I shouldsest be?" 

"Well, yeah..."

"He done tolds ya already, he bes a wizard of the Di'Jinn order. Did ya really expects of him to not has a dead thing sitting here with him?" 

"Well...I...uhm..."

"Ya does'na knows what a Di'Jinn wizard is does ya?" Unicorn asked.

"You're dead?" Was all Mallac could think to say.

"He's a Moon Elf," ZooLock said once again.

"Yes, I heard you before." 

"Ya do'na know who he is being, doose ya?" Unicorn said while trying to stifle a snicker.

"Should I?" 

"I am a Moon Elf," Quaraun said plainly as he began spreading chocolate sauce, pickle slices, and apricot preserves on his biscuits.

"A Moon Elf who likes, BoomFuzzy's chocolate covered apricots...and right now with extra pickles and ice cream. Boy is ya eating weird things lately, Quaraun."

"Does that mean some thing?" 

"The Moon Elves are extinct," Quaraun answered. "They went extinct centuries ago."

"If they went extinct then how can you..."

"It means, that I am Quaraun the Insane, Last of the Moon Elves..." 

"Insane?" 

"Yes. Insane."

"So you're like crazy or something?" 

"Or something. I am Quaraun the Insane, Last of the Moon Elves, Ruler of the Di'Jinn, Murderer of Gibedon the Great, Master of the Dead, Commander of the Lich Lords, Resurector of the Black Dragon, most powerful and most feared Necromancer of all time. I am the most feared wizard on the planet. Lover to the Elf Eater of Pepper Valley. Grand High Emperor of the Triple Planets..." 

"Really?" 

"Really."

"Really?" 

"Yes." 

"Huh. Never heard of you."

Quaraun sighed and went back to eating his meal. 

“Can you help us?” Mallac asked the Elf.

"Tell me what you want." 

"I need your help..." 

"You said that...

"I'm the chief of the guards, of the..." 

"You said that too. If you don't stop annoying me and needlessly interrupting my meal, I'm going to feed you to my Unicorn."

"You have a unicorn too?" 

Quaraun sighed again. 

"Humans are such idiots,” he muttered. “Just tell me what you want." 

"There have been murders..." 

"And you are not a detective, yes I know, you already said all of that. But what do you expect me to do about it?" 

"You're an Elf." 

"Yes, we have established that." 

"And a wizard." 

"Yes. Of the Di'Jinn order, as I have already told you. You're not telling me anything I don't already know." 

"So you are smarter then an average Elf." 

"Of course, I am. I'm smarter then everyone. I'm the Grand High..." 

"Un arrogant," Unicorn added.

"And you are a Necromancer, you can call up the dead and find out who killed them." 

“I can what?”

“You can call up the dead and find out who killed them." 

"Well, That's debatable, but we'll go with that for the moment, except you did not know that I was a wizard or Necromancer, when you first asked for my help. So what did you think I could do then?" 

Just then two more Humans, entered the tavern.

"Have you found anything?" one asks Mallac.

"No, but there are three strangers, just arrived in town. They know nothing of the murders. They know no one in town. I thought, perhaps, because they have no connections, no bias, no motives, They could help us. They have nothing to hide, no reason to lie to us."

Two more men, entered the tavern and joined the other three. The five town guards exchanged updates on their progress, or lack there of, and then discussed Mallac's suggestion that Quaraun, Unicorn, and ZooLock help them.

"They are talking about us," Unicorn said to Quaraun.

"Every one always talks about us, Unicorn. You should be used to it by now." 

"I does not like people talking about us."

"Calm down, Unicorn."

"I wants to eats them." 

"We are not here to eat the villagers, Unicorn." 

"They are annoying ya." 

"We don't eat things that annoy us." 

"Ya said I could eat things that annoyed ya."

"A lot of things annoy me."

"Ya ate yar father."

Quaraun glared at Unicorn.

"What? Ya did."

Quaraun sighed and went back to his meal.

Mallac came back to their table. 

"Will you help us?" 

“Solve a murder?”

“Yes.”

"Do we have choice?" 

"Well, we can't force you, but we could lock you in irons if you refuse."

"Oh! Goody!" Unicorn began clapping excitedly. "Chain him up. I can fucks him better that way!" 

"UNICORN!" Quaraun screamed.

"What? Ya likes being chained up while I fuck ya un ya knows it." 

"Unicorn."

"Ya do." 

"Do you?" Mallac asked.

"He does," ZooLock answered.

"Did I give you permission to talk?" Quaraun growled at the Thullid.

ZooLock recoiled his tentacles and went back to nervously signing psalms of praise to the Sacred Pink Jelly Fish.

"Can we get back to the murders?" Quaraun asked Mallac. 

"He does no like talking about hims sex life," Unicorn said to Mallac. "I on the other hand, loves ta talk about it."

Quaraun ignored Unicorn. 

"Who was killed? How? When? Where? Why? Can you use your idiotically, stupid, useless Human brain long enough to tell me that much at least?" 

Mallac pulled out a map and rolled it out on the table. The map was simple, not to scale, and badly weathered. Mallac pointed out the locations of each murder, in the order which they have occurred.

"It was a ritual killing," Mallac said. "We are sure of it. Each victim was cut palm to palm, all the way up the arms and across the neck. They were each left face down, left to bleed straight into the ground. There was no obvious trails in the dirt. It appears the bodies were killed where they were found and not brought from elsewhere. Until tonight, it had been one victim each night, but this time there were two deaths." 

Mallac sat back and stared at Quaraun, waiting for the Elf to say something.

"Who died? What do you know about them?" 

"The first victim was Gnnizllahuantyotleyog, a Dwarf.” 

"That is a Thullid name," Quaraun said. “Why would a Dwarf have a Thullid name?”

“She was the daughter of the most prominent merchant in town. She was about to be wedded to the son of another prominent merchant, They were going to combine their establishments. We thought at first, that it was motivated by perhaps a third merchant who wanted to prevent the merger of two big shipping companies into one huge shipping company..."

"But you no longer think this?" Quaraun asked.

"No. The second victim was Axcolwbettlii.”

“Also a Thullid name.” 

“He was a big sloth of a man. Not well liked. He had a farm outside of town. Kept children, orphans, you know, little kids, as slaves. Cheaper then farmhands, he said. A lot of people in town would have liked to see him dead..." 

"And there was no connection between the two them? Other then both having Thullid names?" 

"Nope, none as far as I can tell."

Mallac pointed to the third murder site marked on the map.

"Selliinsuji was the third victim.”

“Another Thullid name.” 

“A young girl. Recently married. We found her here, same as the others, cut palm to palm, face down in the mud. Her family's farm is just over there, she was probably on her way home." 

"What's that over there?" Quaraun pointed a large blacked out circle on the map, just off to the side of where Selliinsuji's body was found.

"That's The Black Tower," said Mallac.

"Black Tower?”

Quaraun turned and looked out the window. He could see Black Tower from here.

 “What IS Black Tower?" 

"A tall tower built out of smooth black river stones. It's really ancient. I think it was part of an old castle years ago, but there's nothing but the tower standing there today. It was converted into a lighthouse for a few decades. An old half-Elf lives there now. He fancies himself a wizard, but he's, I don't know, he's kind of stupid. Can't do much in the way of magic, near as I can tell. He's the kind of guy who just wants to run around in a cape. He's got this strange looking servant, also a half-Elf, but not like any Elf I never did see before. Got hair yellower then if it had been painted."

“A Sun Elf?” 

“Don't know Elf types.”

“Sun Elves have bright yellow hair that glows in the dark. And we meet a Sun Elf on the way here. GhoulSpawn. Used to call himself Glinter.”

“Don't know. Just know the old Elf is ancient and the young Elf has got yellow hair like nothing I've ever seen before and they both kind of crazy.”

“Crazy how?”

“Hermits. Keep to themselves. Caught the yellow haired one stealing sheep a couple of times.”

“Sheep?”

“Yeah, not sure what he does with them.”

"Do you suspect him of being connected?" 

“The yellow Elf? Nah. He's kind of crazy, but he seems harmless. I don't think he'd hurt anyone. Not sure what it is with him stealing sheep though. I think he steals corpses too.”

“Corpses?”

“Yep. Caught him a couple of times out in graveyards and fields with a shovel. Never seen him with no body, though. It's like he's looking for buried treasure or something. Strange fella, but nice enough whenever I've talked to him.”

“What about the other one? You said there were two half-Elves. Do you think he's involved?”

"HellBorne? HellBorne the Evil, Summoner of Darkness the Great and Mighty Overlord of the Evil Black Tower of the Dark Castle of Doom? Nah." Mallac laughed at the thought. "No HellBorne is harmless. Crazy as ten coots, but harmless."

"Someone with a name like HellBorne," Unicorn said. "Does no sound harmless." 

"Oh, no. He changed his name to sound scary and spooky. He's like that. No, he wouldn't hurt anybody. I told you, he's an Elf."

"No, you said he was a half-Elf," Quaraun stated, as though half-Elves were scum of the Earth. "You didn't say half what else. If he's half-Human, that alone makes him prone to evil."

“Can an Elf be half something not Human?”

“He could be half-Faerie or half-Dwarf or half-Mountain Troll or half-Orc or half-Demon or...”

“Half-Demon?”

“Yes. Horrible thought.”

"I don't know what else he is, but he's an Elf, so I know he wouldn't hurt no one..."

"Are you of the opinion that being an Elf, precludes one from doing harm?" 

"Well, yeah, I mean, Elves are Elves, they do nice things, like granting wishes..."

"Granting wishes? That's what Kelim said to me."

"Kelim?" 

"An annoyingly stupid Pixie that reminds me of you."

"He asketh Quaraun to grantth him wish," Unicorn explained. "Just before his village went din-din to Pocket Lich."

"Pocket Lich?" 

"Him carries Lich in his pocket."

"You do?" Mallac asked Quaraun.

The Elf just smiled and said: "Yes, and my other Lich doesn't want to be in my bed tonight, otherwise he'd shut up."

Unicorn immediately stopped talking and sat as quiet as a grave.

"Tell me about HellBorne," Quaraun said to Mallac.

"He's just a crazy old coot. Got old and lost his marbles. You know the type. He's just a crazy old man who likes to scare the kiddies. Makes all kinds of lights go off around the tower. Fireworks and stuff. Smoke and nonsense."

"And yet he lives in something called Black Tower."

"Well, yes. Like I said. He''s trying to make himself sound all big and scary. He thinks he's a Necromancer. You know, evil wizard, black mage, army of zombies..."

"I know what a Necromancer is."

"Oh, that's right, you are one aren't you?" 

“Yes, I am.”

 “People like to go up there at night and watch the show. Some times they get drunk and come back talking about all these monsters and things...”

“Monsters?”

“Yeah. Like your squid buddy there, only bigger, more hulking, squatter, fatter, green skin, sort of rubbery looking...”

“Uoogal-Thorpe?” ZooLock asked.

“What?”

“Uoogal-Thorpe.”

“What's that?”

“An Uoogal-Thorpe is a type of Chaos Demon, made out of Thullid larvae implanted into UmberHulks.”

“UmberHulks?”

“Hhhhm, yes. Nasty beasts. I wonder how an Uoogal-Thorpe got into this dimension?”

Mallac pointed to the site of the fourth murder.

"Ellreekii died here..." Mallac started to say.

"That is a Thullid name as well," Quaraun said.

"Elderly woman. An Elf, like you. Well, not like you. But an Elf. Wouldn't harm a soul. She was known for her generosity and kindness. Everyone loved her. Her husband was a merchant of rare herbs and spices." 

"Another merchant?" 

"Yes, well, this is a sea port after all. Ships dock right down yonder." Mallac pointed in the direction of the coastline. A sea gull flew over head and screamed as if to emphasis how close The ocean was to them. "There's a lot of merchants in these parts. Merchants. Captains. Cut throats. Pirates. Scally wags. It’s the area for it. Yeah, stands to reason most folks in town have some connection to a merchant. That’s just the way it is in these parts. What with the ocean right there and all.”

"I see." 

A freckled, distraught boy emerged from an alley.

Mallac watched the boy nervously and waited for him to be out of sight before continuing.

"Well yeah, any ways, he died a few years back. Old age.. Nothing suspicious. Just a really old Elf. Her sons took care of her after he died and she used every penny she had to do good to those less fortunate..Not a sweeter soul in these parts. Can't figure out why any one would hurt such a sweet, kind soul."

"Ellreekii is a Thullid name. No Elf would name there child a Thullid name. She must have changed her name later on. What type of Elf was she?" 

"Just an Elf, I don't know how you tell one from another. An Elf is an Elf."

"Indeed. I could say the same of Humans. You all look alike, can't tell one from another."

"Now you're just being rude."

"And arrogant," added Unicorn. "Very arrogant this one. He be a king ya knows? Went right to his head it did."

"You're a king?" Mallac asked.

"Yes," Quaraun answered. "Though I've no kingdom and no people."

"He killed his people," Unicorn stated.

"You...killed your people?" 

"And he ate his father," Unicorn chirped happily. "Don't forget that."

"You...why?" 



Hamsa
Eye of The Grigoi
Eye of the Watchers
Eye of God
Hand of God
Eye of Protection
Evil Eye
Gypsy Curse


"He cut my hair, burned my dresses, and killed my lover. Said he wanted his son to be a King, not a Queen. and he didn't like BoomFuzzy." 

"What's a BoomFuzzy?" 

"I a BoomFuzzy," said Unicorn. "His father killed me and now I a Unicorn."

"I don't understand."

"His name was BoomFuzzy," said Quaraun. "When he was alive he was a candy maker..."

"Drugged candies," Unicorn corrected. "Played fun with ya mind."

"He's a Phooka," Quaraun went on. "And an Elf Eater. He took up residence in our village, pretended to be a half-Elf and set up a candy shop, which was a false front for the fact that he was a serial killer who used candy to drug Elves, so he could kill them and eat them without them making a fuss."

"Plus ya drug yarself when ya eats drugged Elf flesh," Unicorn said cheerily. "Fun times!"

"So, you're both insane?" Mallac asked.

"Yes," answered ZooLock. "They most certainly are. and I'm their prisoner, not that anyone cares."

"But you're an Elf?" Mallac said to Quaraun.

"Yes."

"And he... eats?... Elves?" 

"Yes."

"But you said he was your lover?" 

"Yes."

"I'm confused."

“Everyone is.”

"Don't try to think about it," warned ZooLock. "It'll mess with your mind. The worse part of it is the fact that he lets the Faerie drink his blood while they fuck each other. He's a sick Elf. Not right in the head at all."

"And you ate your own father?" 

"Yes."

"So you're a cannibal?" 

"No. I don't make a habit of eating Elves. It was a one time thing. A play on something he said once. He did not like BoomFuzzy. The villagers agreed with him. So I killed them and ate him.”

"So, you're a murderer."

"I am Quaraun the Insane, Last of the Moon Elves, Murder of Gibedon the Great, Master of the Dead, Lord of the Lich Lords, Resurector of the Black Dragon, most powerful and most feared Necromancer of all time. Most feared wizard on the planet. Lover to the Elf Eater of Pepper Valley... and you asked for my help in solving a murder. Who better to understand the mind of a murderer, then another murderer?" 

"That...that actually makes sense," Mallac agreed.

An apparently foreign, happy girl walked by very slowly, bringing them out of their side tracked conversation.

"Now this Ellreekii, what did she look like?" 

"She was an Elf." Mallac shrugged. "Elves look like Elves."

Quaraun sighed. "This is why I hate dealing with Humans. They are all so stupid."

Mallac was about to respond but Unicorn stopped him. 

"Donna bother trying to defend ya honour. He be an incredibly arrogant Elf. He be so arrogant, that his ego has it's own pet ego. Ignore it when he tells ya, that yar race be the scum of the Earth and not fit to be ants under his feet. He is a king after all. His father raised him to see everyone as unworthy peasants. If ya really wants his help, just agree that ya is scum of the Earth not worthy to kiss his feet and he'll helps ya out of the kindness of his heart and in the knowledge that it be his duty as king to help those races not fortunate enough to have been born Elves."

"Do you do that?" 

"I should probably point out that my real name was not BoomFuzzy, no matter what he says. I am King Gwallmaiic Elf Eater of Pepper Valley, Leader of the Lich Lords. We is both royalty. Neither of us likes Humans. We both see the Human race as parasites to be squashed, but I is not so open about it as he is. I would rather just eat them and be done with them, while he would rather belittle them and use them as footstools, so either way ya is not dealing with anyone here who thinks very highly of Humans."

"What about him?" Mallac pointed his thumb at ZooLock.

ZooLock tried to answer, but Unicorn shoved him out of his seat. The Thullid fell to the floor and rolled under the table.

"He's a Thullid," Unicorn said. "Ya does nae fucking know what a Thullid is do ya, boy?" 

"No, can't say as I've ever seen anything quite like him. He's like an octopus or something, right?" 

"Most Humans, dub the Thullids as 'The Brain Sucking Squids From Neptune' Moon'. Thullids, eat Humans. They came from across the galaxy in flying ships. They are only here to harvest Humans for slaughter to be sent back to their home planet as steaks. Ya Humans is to the Thullid as cows is to ya Humans. Tasty with a side of fish, chips, and mushy peas. Hmmm. I've not had fish, chips, and mushy peas in ages. Do ya suppose they have it here?" 

Unicorn got up and went to find a waiter to ask. Most of them had run off to hide, as the tavern was running out of food, trying to cater to the Lich's endless hunger.

"You're not sneaking away again," Quaraun said to ZooLock, who had crawled under the table and tried to get to the front door.

ZooLock glumly came back to the table and sat down next to his Elven captor.

"Now then," Quaraun addressed Mallac again. "Ellreekii. When I asked, what she looked like. I meant, describe her to me. Was she tall? Short? Pale? Dark? Blond? Redhead? Green eyes? Blue eyes?..."

"Blue."

"She had blue eyes?" 

"No, she was blue."

"Explain yourself."

"Every inch of her was blue." 

"How so?" 

"Blue skin, darker blue hair, blue eyes, really, really, wicked long blue ears. I mean long ears. Her ears must have been a foot tall above her head. Just like yours. Always wore blue gowns, all embroidered in silver and trimmed in white fur..."

"She's from the Deep North," Unicorn said as he came back to the table eating what appeared to be the arm of a waiter. "What ya is describing is the traditional dress of the Moon Elves."

"Except she was blue, not white," Mallac said.

"Frost Elves," Quaraun said.



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The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane
Volume 11 of 130
The Summoner of Darkness
Full Chapter Index -
About The Novel:

Volume 11: The Summoner of Darkness

Back from the dead, once again with Unicorn in tow, and now with the Thullid priest ZooLock his prisoner shackled in chains, Quaraun is headed back to The Screaming Unicorn Tavern in Old Orchard Beach, but finds himself cursed with endless bad luck, as one thing after another drops out of the sky in his path.

Highwaymen, hellhounds, a turtle as big as a house, fire breathing butterflies, a train station from the 20th century, and a strange glow-in-the-dark demonic wizard with pockets full of sheep, who sits in a red armchair in poppy field in the 1400s reading 1980s spellbooks books by Gary Gaygax.

Quaraun goes head to head against The Gremlin, a time traveling wizard from the future who refuses to allow the Pink Necromancer back into Old Orchard Beach, where since his last visit, an evil Sorcerer named HellBorne has erected a giant cursed lighthouse known as The Black Tower.

ZooLock however has other plans, and while 4 rival wizards tear up the town in a wizard's duel, the Squid Headed Aliens From Neptune's Moon and their armies of JellyFish worshiping cultists arrive in town to preform a ritual that will unleash an Elder Brain Chaos Demon, known as The Sacred Pink JellyFish on the world. Too bad they didn't know she was already in town.


NOTE: Most of this novel will be available as free to read online.


Please Note: The Quaraun Series Is Rated M18+ and you must be 18 or older to buy it.

Most pages on EelKat.com are about writing Yaoi, and thus probably is NSFW; reader discretion is advised.

Why is the Quaraun Series Rated M18+?


Quaraun is a character I play in Dungeons & Dragons. Like most every other novel in the series, this novel is based off the notes taken from an actual game play session.

The Summoner of Darkness is based off the Dungeons & Dragons Campaign: The Murder of the Seven Points by Erik Yaple.

If you are a Dungeon Master interested in running a game using this story, the game guide used is this one here --->>>






List Of Sample Chapters
Available To Read Online:


Introducing GhoulSpawn



The Cultists and The Coming of The Darkness



EelKat and The Kats of Planet Ptarmagin



The Moon Elves of Ivujivik



A Letter To Home



HellBorne and The Missing Sacrificial Sheep



The Return of ZooLock



Highwaymen 



Another Letter To Home



Hellhounds



The Half-Elf Thief With Pockets Full of Sheep



The Gremlin's Warning



"I am Very Concerned About Blueberries." - Back At The Blueberry Plains of The Screaming Unicorn Inn



A Field of Fire Breathing Butterflies



A Field of Poppies On The Road To Witch Pond



The Road To Witch Pond (Part 2)



The Road To Witch Pond (Part 3)



Santa's Dead Floating Body



The Pumpkins Are Following Us



A Third Letter To Home



The Abandoned Cathedral



A Piano Fell From The Sky



Worms!



The Glow-In-The-Dark Sun Elf Who Fell From The Sky



GhoulSpawn and Quaraun Trapped With A Phooka



Night Terrors



"Him not hurt. Him just cry baby."



The Pregnant Jelly Fish



The Banshee Sisters: Bean-Nighe and Ben-Neeyah In the Swamp of Death



A Fourth Letter To Home - The Masochistic Elf With Stockholm Syndrome



Stay Wid Us Too Lang, Ya Go Crazy Wid Us



The Black Lighthouse



Strange Nightmares



Pumpkins Again



The River Boat Man-Woman



The Strange Village or I Love The Smell Of Decomposing Bodies In The Morning



Food Fight In a Funeral Home



The Golden Rooster



Shrimp Dinners 



Meeting Mallac



A Serial Killer at Large



Corsets, Elves, and Undead Faeries.



Visiting The Scene of Murder #1 With An UnGelded Stallion



Eating Butter, Kicking Babies, and Pickles Up Your Ass



The Sixth Letter To Home



The Fetishes of Phookas



Back At The Tavern and Still No Shrimp



A Tavern Scene Part 1 - "Ever heard of a chastity cage?"



A Tavern Scene Part 2 - Drunk Elves, Shrimp Dinners, and Dungeon Masters From The Future



A Tavern Scene Part 3 - Quaraun, Unicorn, GhoulSpawn, - Time Travel, Chastity Cages, and Whores



He Kills People With Candy (The 7th Letter To Home)



ZooLock Again - Off To Talk to Merchants About Murder #2



Three Days, Three Murders, & Still No Shrimp Dinners



Tumbling Down Stairs With Slutty Elves and Angry Liches



The Missing Children Bean-Nighe and Ben-Neeyah Warned Of



Explosions From The Sea



A Hurricane Hits The Lighthouse



The Blind Phooka



You Always See The Pony?



Murder #4 & Questions About The Black Tower



Pumpkins, Blueberries, and Shrimp



The Thullids Arrive In Town



Investigating Murder #5



ZooLock's Thullid Cultists



Where Are You Hiding That Horse?



Murder #6 - The Red Herring Murder



Murder #6 - The Real Murder



The First Try At Entering Black Tower



The Black Tower's Garden of Death



The Hostess Twinkie Aisle of Biddeford Wal-Mart



Elves In Chandeliers



Aardsvorkus Muddsburge & The Crystal cave of Time and Necromancy



The Train Station



Back At The Tavern



Mallac and The Murder Weapon



Mallac And The Shambling Dead - No Spell Is Ever without A Price



Why is there an elephant in my bed?



"Kcuf! Kcuf! Kcuf! Kcuf! Kcuf! Kcid a kcus! Kcuf!"



Another Night, Another Murder (Murder #7)



HellBorne The Evil, Lord of Black Tower



Elwin



"My first thought was, where would a three year old put your bag of holding?"



The Oozing Plate Of Sugar Cookies Bludgeoned By The Courageous Alien Being Chased By A Bloodthirsty Crazed Celebrity Chef



The Map of The Town



Elwin and The Town Full of Dead Children



Glimmer Monks wear nothing underneath their robes...



Can Unicorns conceal themselves amongst normal horses and pick them off in secret?



The Thullids Are Gathering Around The Golden Rooster



A Bag Full of Pickled Jellyfish



Back At Black Tower



The Bottomless Pit



I'm HellBorne The Evil, Lord of Black Tower, of The Castle of Blood and Death


Necromancers Don't Wear Pink



BoomFuzzy's Evil Army of Blood Thirsty Marshmallow Tutti-Frutti Fuzzy Wuzzy Fluffy Bunnies



The Cult of The Sacred Pink Jelly Fish



The Pregnant Jellyfish and The Murdered Half-Elf



The Wrath of The Pink Necromancer



Darkness Falls



Back To Black Tower Again



The Ptarmagin Kats of Space Dock 13



On Board The VISION-D8



Elwin Again (The End?)









Did You Know?

The Summoner of Darkness is the first time The Gremlin, EelKat, Lyxiana, Bela, and Spriggan (all characters from the original 1978 edition of Friends Are Forever, Volume 1 of The Twighlight Manor Series) make appearances in The Quaraun series.

While most of the Quaraun series is written with Quaraun as the only point of view character, EelKat, the primary point of view character of the Twighlight Manor series, alternates with Quaraun as a point of view character in Summoner of Darkness.

The novel tells 2 stories side by side, with all odd numbered chapters telling Quaraun's version of the story in the 1400s, and all even numbered chapters being written as letters from EelKat in the 1980s to her sister Lynxian.

EelKat is a 4th wall meta breaking narrator.


Answering Reader Questions:
GhoulSpawn's Sheep Explained


Who Is GhoulSpawn?

This is the first time GhoulSpawn appears using the name GhoulSpawn. In previous volumes he was using the name Glinta instead.

In the Twighlight Manor series he is known as The Gremlin.

Quaraun's teenaged lover GhoulSpawn is a "natural born" Sorcerer. He is a half-Elf/half Demon. 

GhoulSpawn's father was an evil Demon who commanded an army of Ghouls. Because of this, he was known simply as "The Ghoul". 

GhoulSpawn's mother was a Sun Elf whom had fallen in love with The Ghoul, but was forbidden by her family to have contact with him. She in turn ran away with her Demon lover, thus causing a war between Elves and Demons.

The Sun Elves tell a story of how their Princess was kidnapped and raped by the Ghoul, thus she gave birth to the Spawn of the Ghoul. Though his mother named him Glinta, she died while he was still very young, and his Elven kin, took to calling him GhoulSpawn as a way to brand him not one of them.

GhoulSpawn is an interdimensional time traveller, because he is unable to remain in any one time, place or dimension long, because he was born in the Hell Dimension, which exists outside of the realm of time and space as we know it. The Ghoul tried to escape the Sun Elves by going to the distant future (1974) and leaving his half-Elf son and the boy's mother there to live among a band of LSD addicted hippie Humans whom drove a 1974 AMC Gremlin.

The Sun-Elves eventually found their missing she-Elf and brought her back to the 1400s where she belonged, but she refused to leave her half-Demon son behind.

After his mother's death, GhoulSpawn was made a servant to his High Elf step-father and full blooded Elf step siblings, all of whom abused him and treated him like a slave. He grew up constantly being told he, because he was only a half-Elf, was unloved and unwanted and should have been killed at birth, resulting in the very low self esteem he has.

Neither Demons nor half-Elves are considered welcomed members of society, both being forced to live in small tribal groups on the outskirts of civilization. Both are often stoned to death or hung if they dare set foot in a city.

GhoulSpawn being both a Demon and a half-Elf is doubly mistreated by the majority of the world's population. He takes to travelling with Quaraun because Quaraun simply accepts GhoulSpawn as he is and is not bothered by being seen in the company of either a Demon or a half-Elf.

There are several instances when people try to bully GhoulSpawn and Quaraun (a high ranking full-blooded aristocratic High Elf) is quick to stand up for him, protecting and defending the half-Elf. Quaraun is often classified by other Elves as "insane" simply because he is willing to be friends with a half-Elf.

GhoulSpawn has a speech impediment which lessens when he is relaxed and grows worse the more nervous or frightened he becomes.

Around calm laid back characters like Quaraun, GhoulSpawn speaks without difficulty. However around domineering, headstrong, or bullying characters such as Unicorn or HellBorne, GhoulSpawn develops a stutter, making it difficult for him the get to the end of a sentence. 

Because he is a Demon, GhoulSpawn was born with natural magical abilities, making him a rare "natural born wizard" or sorcerer.

GhoulSpawn is typical of a Sorcerer in the Quaraun series, in that he has Demon blood, was thus born with a Demon's natural ability to cast magic on some levels, has taking to self-teaching himself how to control the magic powers he was born with, is outcast from society because of his link to Demons, and is generally not well thought of, even though he is not in any way evil, and is in fact the only part of the cast who could be considered anything close to being a Hero.

Being a time traveller, there are times when Quaraun encounteres both GhoulSpawn and his future counterpart Gremlin in the same novel.

This is the first novel in the series to feature multiple versions of GhoulSpawn in a single novel.









Did You Know:
Summoner of Darkness
was written on location at the real Witch Pond?

Meet The Real Witch Hole Pond:






If You Want To Visit Witch Hole Pond For Yourself, Here Are The Directions To It: 
(Address is: Witch Hole Pond, Carriage Road, Mt. Desert Island, Acadia National Park, Bar Harbour, Maine)

Interview With EelKat
While Walking On The Real Road To
Witch Hole Pond In Bar Harbour, Maine






A Real Turtle In Witch Hole Pond:






A Bald Eagle Bathing In Witch Hole Pond:






And the swamp just before the pond...






Driving Park Loop Road Around Witch Hole Pond...






And climbing Bubble Rock Mountain overlooking Witch Hole Pond...
















This novel was originally written in: 2014 - 2016




.

.



The Quaraun Series On Amazon:

I am wondering why has Amazon moved the Quaraun books to the category "Transgender Romance" and also "Gay Erotica"? The base story is a deeply depressed, suicidal, drug addict Elf who's lover commit suicide and he's trying not to do the same. It's an old Elf in a tavern, monologuing a lot of flashbacks and back story scenes of his youth. These stories are dark, bloody, angsty, full of drug use, murder, rape, Medieval torture, mental/physical/emotional abuse, and references to depression and suicide - no romance in it, unless you count the occasional (and usually brutally violent) rape scenes that show up in nearly every volume - sorry - no clue what Amazon is thinking or why they moved these to Romance and Erotica, but these books are NOT even close to being Romance or Erotica on any level at all. When I published these books I put them in "Dark Fantasy" and "Yaoi". If they show up in any category other then "Dark Fantasy" and "Yaoi", it's because Amazon put them there without my authorization or approval.

~EelKat



Author Interviews
On Writing The Quaraun Series:


Author Interviews
On CosPlaying The Quaraun Characters:


Author Interviews
Reacting To Old Orchard Beach's
White Power Gay Hating Over Reaction Ban
Of The Quaraun Series:


The 4 door white truck continues to sit at the end of my drive way (146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine) near every night around sunset, reeving it's engine and squealing it's tires, with the driver yelling anti-gay threats and obscenities out the window. He continues to do the same thing at my dad's apartment building (Biddeford Maine) a few times a week, usually in mid to late afternoon time. He continues to follow me to shopping to various stores in various towns throughout the states.

Phrases he yells from the truck include:

"Kill or be killed remember Saco Shaws all transsexuals are alike"

"I keep a gun under the seat of my truck, I'm gonna use it to shoot you in the head, you transvestite freak"

if cars are going by he yells to them: "that thing is Ken's son, look at how's it's dressed; it's insane, it has autism, we can't allow that thing and it's gay cars in our family friend town of Old Orchard Beach"

He often babbles deranged ramblings about something he calls "the gay-pocalypse", raving lunacy about how "all the gays are gathering" on his doorstep. He raves some crazy nonsense about how Armageddon is coming and the war to end all wars will be "the gays against the Christians" and Christians have to be ready to "kill the gays"

My car is the Autism Awareness Car and had 2.5million marbles glued to it (I have Autism - savant - Kanner's syndrome) he claims tat my car "is gay" because of what it looks like. My car has been vandalized several dozen times, including to have the tires slashed 7 times in 6 months.

After dark often around 10PM, he stands at the end of the logging road across the street from me and shoots at my motohome (in February 2014 he shot holes in my neighbour's barn while doing this). I have video footage of 3 of his shootings at me here:  https://youtu.be/NUebzJ9sz9U and here: https://youtu.be/C4dZbgG-Smw

This has gone on since August 2013 now, in addition to all the vandalism, hate crimes, pet beheadings, etc that has happened, including the bomb that blew up our house in 2006.

As you know, that whole time I had not been able to get a plate number on the truck. He as just here again, and I just realized why I could not get a plate number... there are no plates on the truck, either on the front or on the back. However, as he was driving away today... I noticed, there is a plate, stuck up in the back window of the truck, where it can barely be seen, deliberately obscured from view behind a silver tool box.





If You Like The Quaraun Series You Might Also Like:


Writing Resources I Use When Writing The Quaraun Books:




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More pages you might like...



What do you want to become? 
What did you do today to step closer to that goal?
Whatever you do, be your best at it!
And remember to have yourself a great and wonderfully glorious day!

~EK
EelKat.com
pinterest.com/eelkat/
youtube.com/user/EelKat






By EelKat Wendy C Allen







Books By EelKat
Currently Available on Amazon Kindle:

Paperback:


And why 27 books were deleted off Amazon after being banned by The Old Orchard Beach, Maine Town Hall, an American Government organization, on January 4, 2016, for being "Too Gay For The Family Friendly Town of Old Orchard Beach".






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The Top 202 Most Visited Pages of 2017

Seeing how on October 15, 2017, we reached 10,000 pages, I thought it'd be fun to update the Top 100 List and see where were were now.

Top 202 Most Viewed Pages Of 2017 So Far
(Out of 10,000 pages)

(January 2017 to October 2017)
(Excluding the Home PageAbout Page, and Site Map Page, which were the top 3)

  1. Amphibious Aliens: The Story of Etiole & The World's Most Haunted Car
  2. The GoldenEagle: An Auto-biography of the World's Most Haunted Car
  3. Medieval Servants: Their jobs and their place in historical fiction.
  4. How Long is 50,000 Words?
  5. On being a handicapped CosPlayer at PortCon Maine 2017
  6. Stephen King's The Thinner and The Gypsies Of Old Orchard Beach, Maine
  7. Writing Mute Characters
  8. Flamboyant Nipples: The KKK's New Gay Hating Site About Old Orchard Beach | The Site That Makes Fun of Terrorist Hate Crimes
  9. Writing Dares Random Generator
  10. Don't put flyers on people's cars...
  11. The Saco River Curse
  12. Our Primary Site Topic Is Small Penis? Reaching #1 on Page 1 of Google.
  13. Help FBI End Anti-Gay White Power Terrorist Attacks of Old Orchard Beach
  14. Creating Character Profiles | Meet The Characters | Who Is Quaraun?
  15. Introduction To The Quaraun Series: aka Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach
  16. The Dazzling Razzberry aka EelKat's Autism Awareness Car
  17. Autism, Asperger, PTSD, & Mad Cow: Writing Clinical Insanity Accurately | What is wrong with Quaraun? 
  18. Quaraun Free To Read Online Complete Chapter Index In Chronological Order
  19. Necromancy: Fact Vs Fiction; Or How Can You Be A Necromancer In Real Life?
  20. 600 Pages: Epic Big Super Sized Novels and Why You Should Never Write One
  21. Why Crude Adult Comedy and Pink Humor Yaoi Is Not Erotica
  22. The FBI In Old Orchard Beach, Maine Trying To Capture A Domestic Terrorist
  23. One Gypsy's Review of My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding
  24. The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - page 1 (Online Release of Banned Book)
  25. Autism, Asperger's, And The Danger of The Self-Diagnosis
  26. Spell Casting Side Effects: Magic In Quaraun's Universe | Author Interview
  27. What Type of Music Does A Gypsy Listen To? My Top 10 Favorite Bands
  28. Beware of White Men In Gypsy Clothing: Fake Psychic Scams
  29. How long does it take to hit 1667 words?
  30. How to Write A Kiss
  31. Phookas
  32. Creating Character Profiles | Meet The Characters | Who Is GhoulSpawn?
  33. Albino Races - Moon Elves In The Quaraun Series
  34. Daily Writing Prompts (June 2017 Archive)
  35. My 30th Anniversary of Being Transgender
  36. Why Are The Quaraun Books Rated M18+
  37. How to Write Hot Sex - Tips For Erotic Romance Authors
  38. The Zaharam-Chapelle-Parunas Ethnographical World Building Questionnaire
  39. The Jiggler & The G-String Teddy Bears | The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane
  40. What exactly makes an Elf an Elf? (What is the definition of an Elf?)
  41. Online Income: The Reality vs The Fantasy
  42. World's Most Haunted Car Merchandise
  43. I Am Not GhoulSpawn | Excerpt From Rose Garden of The Pink Necromancer
  44. Old Orchard Beach Hate Crimes
  45. BoomFuzzy Chapter 1 (Novel Excerpt - Quaraun The Insane)
  46. How can your books have gay transvestite characters and not be Erotica? or Why are gay haters beating up elderly woman for wearing pink for breast cancer awareness and saying she's a transexual because only transexuals wear pink?
  47. EelKat's Guide To NaNoWriMo Featuring The 13 Step Method To Writing
  48. Autism and the Stigmas - Why Can’t You Accept Me As Me?
  49. Maine UFO Sightings
  50. Page 11 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - The Scottish Traveller Crime Family
  51. Psychedelics In A 'High' High Fantasy World (High Elves Getting High)
  52. KBoards, The NaNoWriMo ML Rumor & The Vindictive Stalker
  53. Writing Racist Characters VS The Ku Klux Klan In Old Orchard Beach, Maine
  54. Captured By The Lich Lord | The Night of The Screaming Unicorn
  55. How To Build A Magic System
  56. I've everything but a kitchen sink. Wait, how'd that sink get in my pocket?
  57. Stephen King's Thinner Gypsies & The Ku Klux Klan of Old Orchard Beach
  58. Autistic Characters In Fiction
  59. City of The Slushies | Chapter 7 | Quaraun The Insane
  60. Manuscript Reading Services or Will You Read My Book and Tell Me What You Think?
  61. Suicide, Rape, and Abuse In The Quaraun Series
  62. Wizards vs Witches vs Sorcerers: How are they different? | Writing Fantasy Books
  63. FRED: Google's Most Deadly Update Ever?
  64. How To Write A Novel: Question Everything Before Putting It In Your World
  65. Content writing: How long do you spend creating a quality blog post?
  66. SBI: To Review or Not to Review? That Is The Question
  67. Twerking Dragons: The Joys Of Writing A Novel With A Voice Recorder
  68. A Day At Witch Pond & Fleeing To The Forest | Summoner of Darkness
  69. Transgender, Transsexual, Transvestite, or Intersex: What Is Quaraun?
  70. Sheep | GhoulSpawn The Crazed & The Rose Garden of The Pink Necromancer
  71. Colour Magic - Gypsy Style
  72. Ideas, Ideas, Ideas (Where Do You Get Them?)
  73. Keywords & Pigeons: How I Do Local Business Marketing
  74. Quaraun & Autism In Fantasy Novels
  75. The Signs Of Old Orchard Beach & The FBI Investigation Of The Town Hall
  76. Tom Addams & The Warrior's Forum
  77. A Field of Poppies On The Road To Witch Pond | Summoner of Darkness
  78. An Elf and a Lich in the Gingerbread Pit | The Night of The Screaming Unicorn
  79. Markiplier Jacksepticeye and Pewdiepie Play Resident Evil 7
  80. Santa Claus: Lich Of The North Pole (Includes NSFW 18+ CBT Yaoi scene)
  81. A Motorhome named 'No Hurry' becomes Rosebud & The Story of Ten Kidnapped Cats
  82. Create Original Content aka I Hate Jackass Gutter Scum Thieves
  83. Lost In a Space That Isn't There: Going North To Head South
  84. An Elf Gone Mad: The Rise of The Pink Necromancer
  85. Aspergers is NOT Autism
  86. Is The Quaraun Series Erotica? - No! Here's why...
  87. Summoner of Darkness: GhoulSpawn and Quaraun Trapped With A Phooka
  88. The Dungeon Master & The 1974 AMC Gremlin
  89. The Lich's True Form Revealed | The Night of The Screaming Unicorn
  90. Using work you already started for national novel writing month?
  91. World-building In The Quaraun Series: Creating a Fantasy World
  92. Books in Vacationland 2017
  93. BoomFuzzy's Gingerbread House From Hell
  94. Lets Playing Is No Longer Fun
  95. Santa's Floating Dead Body | A Scene From The Summoner of Darkness
  96. The Banshee Sisters: Bean-Nighe and Ben-Neeyah In the Swamp of Death
  97. The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - page 2 (Online Release of Banned Book)
  98. What vlogging equipment is needed to get started as a YouTube vlogger?
  99. April 2015 Update: Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach: The Kidnapped Cats
  100. Betta Fish Aesthetic on Pinterest
  101. Domain Name Branding: Should You Put Your Brand Name In Your URL?
  102. Life As A YouTuber: How To Earn An Income From Making Videos
  103. Making YouTube Videos: How did you decide what content to make?
  104. Page 4 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  105. Twighilight Not Twilight
  106. YouTube Index
  107. Amphibious Aliens: My health since the stroke and Etiole . . .
  108. Are You A Satan Worshiper?
  109. Average Typing Speed
  110. Custom Leggings - Designs By EelKat
  111. Ernest Hemingway Style of Writing Literary Fiction Used In Epic Fantasy Novels
  112. Google Flagged Your Site! What To Do? (Help For Web Masters)
  113. How valuable is a writer’s group?
  114. Lives Destroyed: Amphibious Aliens 10th Anniversary Update
  115. Lost In a Space That Isn't There: Santa's Letter To Satan
  116. Summoner of Darkness: Quaraun Meets The Gremlin
  117. The Terrorists of Old Orchard Beach Put My Dad In a Coma
  118. Using Yahoo Answers to promote your book and author website.
  119. What Is This Site?
  120. You Stole My Idea - I was writing a book, but you already wrote it 10 years ago!
  121. City of The Slushies | Chapter 1 | Quaraun The Insane
  122. Creative Writing Story Prompts: September 2017 Edition
  123. Dungeons and Dragons: The Joys Of Calculating Gold Weight In AD&D 2ed
  124. Fabric Designed By EelKat
  125. My Fave YouTubers Play: Dream Daddy - The Yaoi Dad Dating Sim Otome Game
  126. Necromancy: How will resurrection affect society as a whole?
  127. Page 7 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  128. Pink Flowers Aesthetic on Pinterest
  129. The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - page 12 (Online Release of Banned Book)
  130. What will a traveler encounter on the roads in your world?
  131. Are you insane? Am I? Let's Find Out...
  132. Becoming A Better Writer: How to write interesting dialogue.
  133. Character Creation
  134. Copper Cockeral Cards & Gifts
  135. Elves, Drugs, and Opium: A Look At The Drug Use In The Quaraun Books
  136. How To Stay Motivated To Write | Writing Fantasy Books
  137. Jewelry Fashions in Moon Elf Culture | World Building | Writing Fantasy Books
  138. Keyword Marketing - What to do when your best keywords are low demand
  139. Magic Systems and How to Build Them | Writing Fantasy Books
  140. NaNoWriMo Overachievers: How did you do it?
  141. Quaraun Cover Art Gallery | Fantasy Novel Book Cover Art
  142. Quaraun The Insane : Zebulon's Captive: The Last of The Moon Elves
  143. SEO Advantages of Embedding YouTube Videos On Your Website
  144. Summoner of Darkness: A Tavern Scene - Chastity Cages, and Whores
  145. Summoner of Darkness: The Return of ZooLock (free to read online)
  146. Twighlight Not Twilight Part 2
  147. Vanishing Books Update - Why 27 of my books were deleted off Amazon
  148. What is a God in Your Universe? | World Building | Writing Fantasy Books
  149. Writing Maine: How To Write About Maine Life Accurately
  150. What the Ocean Gives Me (How Things In Your Life Affect Your Writing)
  151. City of The Slushies | Chapter 14 | Quaraun The Insane
  152. February 10, 2008 - Harassment Continues in Old Orchard Beach, Maine
  153. How does a bestselling book become a bestseller?
  154. Marriage in Moon Elf Culture | World Building | Writing Fantasy Books
  155. People are not interested in long winded copy
  156. September 26, 2017 - The Latest Attack By The KKK on The Thinner Gypsies
  157. Spending Money To Make Money Online? Should You Do It?
  158. Summoner of Darkness: The Demon Cultists and The Coming of The Darkness
  159. Summoner of Darkness: The Map of The Town (novel free to read online)
  160. The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt GOTY | Completionist Run: Episode 01
  161. Trespassers: April 2007 Updates
  162. Turning Scenes, Into Stories & Writing Travelogue Style Fantasy Books
  163. Where To Get Endless Ideas For Short Stories, Novels, and Articles
  164. Writing Controversial Books: Political Correctness & White Supremacists
  165. Are Bad Reviews Good For You?
  166. Branding Yourself While Avoiding The Scams | EelKat On Content Writing
  167. Child Sacrifice in Fantasy Novels | Writing Fantasy Books
  168. How to Handle Writing Fantasy-Horror That Features Violence Against Children
  169. How would you explain your Fantasy world to a stranger?
  170. Page 6 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  171. Summoner of Darkness: HellBorne The Evil, Lord of Black Tower
  172. The return of Friends Are Forever - Banned and Burned it's about to be reborn!
  173. Why do Lovecraftian beings come to earth?
  174. Writing Prompts Syndrome?
  175. Autism = The Crazy Cat Woman of Maine
  176. Autism: Understanding what is really going on inside the child’s head.
  177. But what exactly IS a full time income?
  178. Content Marketing & writing: How I write content for my website
  179. Do you write a novel start-to-finish?
  180. GhoulSpawn and The Lich Lord's Lover: How To Kill a Lich
  181. How is it that the church leaders are claiming you do not pay tithes?
  182. How To Write A Novel: In what order do you create your world?
  183. I loved my children but I loved BoomFuzzy more | From Quaraun The Insane
  184. My Two Favorite People: FarDarrig and The Baby That Never Should Have Been
  185. Need help writing characters of color | EelKat on racist white readers
  186. Quaraun and the Amazon Adult Filter
  187. Quaraun GhoulSpawn and The Lich Lord's Lover: The Lover's Triangle
  188. Summoner of Darkness: Where Are You Hiding That Horse?
  189. Tired of people who don’t care. :( Tired of the harassment. :(
  190. What would happen if an Elf adopted a Human baby? | Writing Fantasy Books
  191. Page 10 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  192. Page 3 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  193. Page 8 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  194. SCRIPT FRENZY 2010: I WON! & Psycho Stalker Attacks
  195. Wristlets, Wrist Bags, Mini Clutch, Cosmetic Bags, and Designer Mini Purses
  196. Writing Your Novel: Do you save chapters as individual files?
  197. Are old AD&D adventures still any use to current players?
  198. Autistics Have Feelings Too & Diverse Books Rant
  199. Be True To You: YouTube Gamers: "Faking" a personality until you make it?
  200. City of The Slushies | Chapter 10 | Quaraun The Insane
  201. HEA in Erotica (Should You Write Happily Ever Afters?)
  202. Stephen King's Thinner Gypsies



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“Karma comes after everyone eventually. You can't get away with screwing people over your whole life, I don't care who you are. What goes aroMy Two Favorite People: FarDarrig and The Baby That Never Should Have Been

Need help writing characters of color | EelKat on racist white readers

und comes around. That's how it works. Sooner or later the universe will serve you the revenge that you deserve.” 

― Jessica Brody


"By autistic standards, the “normal” brain is easily distractible, is obsessively social, and suffers from a deficit of attention to detail and routine. Thus people on the spectrum experience the neurotypical world as relentlessly unpredictable and chaotic, perpetually turned up too loud, and full of people who have little respect for personal space." 

— Steve Silberman



Attempt Something New Today! – too many people talk about doing this or that but few actually take action, it's the why behind why so few succeed and so many fail.




I'm not made of money, I'm made out of glitter and kittens. 

~CinnamonToastKen 2017


“When people see you're happy doing what you're doing, it sort of takes the power away from them to tease you about it.” 

― Wendy Mass, Every Soul a Star




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“If you're horrible to me, I'm going to write a song about it, and you won't like it. That's how I operate.” 

― Taylor Swift



Bullies should never force you to  suffer in silence. If someone has hurt you, let others know.



“One's dignity may be assaulted, vandalized and cruelly mocked, but it can never be taken away unless it is surrendered.” 
― Michael J. Fox



“I would rather be a little nobody, then to be a evil somebody.” 

― Abraham Lincoln


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