Writers Write and Scammers Scam or What the fuck is with the 2,000 word article myth that SEOers are promoting all over hell this year??

ChatGPT's answer:

Quaraun, BoomFuzzy, and GhoulSpawn nestled on a mossy log, surrounded by the enchanting whispers of the Maine forest. The air carried the briny scent of the nearby rocky coast, and a gentle snowfall blanketed the landscape in a soft, serene layer. Quaraun's blue eyes sparkled like moonlight on snow, and his silver Rapunzel hair cascaded down his back, capturing the essence of winter's magic.

BoomFuzzy, blind from silver cataracts, relied on the vivid descriptions of his beloved Quaraun. Dressed in a black hakama and a purple obi, he felt the textures around him through his fingertips, savoring the touch of the moss beneath him. GhoulSpawn, with his glittering gold-flecked pleco eyes, wore a vibrant ensemble of yellow and orange, topped with a green velvet coat that added a touch of warmth to the snowy tableau.

As they rested on the mossy log, the trio engaged in lively conversation. Quaraun, his words like the fluttering of delicate snowflakes, described the wonders of the Maine flora and fauna around them. BoomFuzzy, attuned to the nuances of scent, detected the subtle aroma of pine and salty sea air, nodding in appreciation. GhoulSpawn, the groovy quantum physicist, interjected with snippets of his latest time-travel theories, his words swirling in the cold breeze like the colors of a psychedelic dream.

On the edge of the river, in the enchanting forest, Quaraun, BoomFuzzy, and GhoulSpawn continued their journey. Setting up their pink silk tent, the fabric glowed against the white landscape, a beacon of warmth and coziness. Inside, the trio shared tales of their adventures, the vivid hues of their clothing contrasting with the snow-laden world outside.

And amidst the vibrant dialogue, the trio touched the world around them—a soft caress of fur pelts, the crunch of snow beneath their boots, the comforting weight of each other's presence. Quaraun's descriptions painted a tapestry of colors, tastes, and sounds, capturing the essence of the Maine coast in its icy future.

In the midst of this creative exchange, the trio found inspiration, a sensory symphony echoing the beauty of Maine's landscapes. The air buzzed with the energy of their camaraderie, the essence of their characters woven into the fabric of the story, much like the pink silk that enveloped their cozy tent by the river's edge.

Quaraun, BoomFuzzy, and GhoulSpawn, gathered in their cozy lighthouse on the rocky coast of Maine, engaged in a lively discussion about the curious practices of SEOs. The sound of ocean waves crashing against the shore provided a rhythmic backdrop to their conversation.

"Ah, the whims of those who navigate the digital realms," mused Quaraun, his blue eyes reflecting the flickering candlelight in the room. "It seems they weave intricate spells to entice writers into crafting tomes of 2,000 words or more, all in the pursuit of elusive indexing."

BoomFuzzy, blind to the intricacies of SEO strategies, relied on Quaraun's vivid descriptions of the online landscape. Dressed in his black hakama and purple obi, he listened intently as Quaraun continued, "They dance with algorithms, my dear BoomFuzzy, as if length were the measure of a tale's worth."

GhoulSpawn, the groovy sheep-demon with his glittering gold-flecked pleco eyes, chimed in, "It's like they're summoning words from the abyss, expecting a magical incantation of 2,000 or more to unlock the gates of search engine favor."

The trio pondered the motives behind this curious obsession, their hands tracing patterns on fur pelts, feeling the comforting textures as they delved into the mysteries of SEO practices. Quaraun, the eloquent wordsmith, described the ever-changing algorithms like the shifting tides, unpredictable yet captivating.

As they exchanged thoughts, the lighthouse echoed with the sound of their banter, the warmth of their camaraderie contrasting with the cold winds outside. "Perhaps," suggested GhoulSpawn, "it's an enchantment to captivate the wandering eyes of the algorithmic deities."

Quaraun chuckled, "Aye, my dear GhoulSpawn, the digital gods must have their preferences, much like we have ours in the realms of cozy fantasy and romance."

And so, within the confines of their lighthouse, surrounded by the elements of Maine's rocky coast, the trio marveled at the curious dance between SEOs and content writers, a spectacle that seemed as unpredictable as the snowfall outside their window.

Quaraun, BoomFuzzy, and GhoulSpawn sat down on a mossy log, their lively conversation echoing through the air as they delved into the perplexing world of SEO practices. The lighthouse, perched on the cold, rocky coast of Maine, provided a snug haven for their discourse.

Quaraun, his blue eyes gleaming with curiosity, began, "In the digital tapestry of words, there exists a fascination with the number 2,000. A spell woven by SEOs, it seems, to enchant content writers into crafting lengthy tomes as if the very essence of visibility depends on it."

BoomFuzzy, his blind eyes capturing the essence of the discussion through the richness of Quaraun's descriptions, nodded thoughtfully. Dressed in his black hakama and purple obi, he absorbed the nuances of the conversation like a blind sage attuned to the vibrations of wisdom.

GhoulSpawn, the groovy sheep-demon, interjected with a chuckle, "It's as if they've concocted a potion that requires exactly 2,000 words to appease the algorithmic overlords. A peculiar incantation, wouldn't you say?"

The trio, surrounded by fur pelts and the soft touch of moss beneath them, continued their dialogue. Quaraun's pink slubby silk rustled as he animatedly described the digital landscape, filled with ever-shifting algorithms and mysterious SEO rituals.

"Yet," mused Quaraun, "neither Google nor any other digital deity has declared the necessity of 2,000 words for favorable indexing. It appears to be a dance of illusion, a mirage in the vast desert of online content creation."

As the Maine coast's chilly winds whispered outside the lighthouse, the trio shared their thoughts on the deception of word count expectations. GhoulSpawn, in his vibrant yellow and orange caftan, proposed, "Perhaps it's a quest for perceived authority, a misguided belief that longer always equates to better."

The mossy log beneath them cradled the trio as they explored the intricacies of SEO, their banter a blend of wisdom and whimsy. Within the cozy confines of their lighthouse, surrounded by the elements of Maine's snow-covered landscape, they unraveled the mysteries of a digital realm where 2,000 words held a peculiar, enchanting allure.

ChatGPT's answer:

Dear aspiring writer,

First and foremost, welcome to the enchanting realm of Fantasy writing! Your inquiry about SEOs and their insistence on 2,000-word articles reveals a common perplexity in the digital landscape. As a bestselling Fantasy novelist who crafts Cozy Fantasy, Gothic Fantasy, and Sword & Sorcery tales, I understand the importance of navigating this intriguing yet sometimes confounding aspect of the writing journey.

SEO, or Search Engine Optimization, is indeed a mystical force in the realm of online content. The fixation on 2,000-word articles, however, is not a decree handed down by the digital gods, but rather a manifestation of certain practices that have taken root in the ever-evolving field of content creation.

One plausible reason for this fascination could be linked to the notion of perceived authority. Some SEO experts believe that longer articles convey a sense of depth and expertise on a given topic. However, it's crucial to debunk this myth, for the true essence of authority lies not in the quantity of words but in the quality of storytelling.

As a Fantasy writer, your craft is a magical tapestry of imagination, and it's essential to prioritize the enchantment your words weave over arbitrary word counts. Consider the vibrancy of shorter narratives, the way they can captivate readers with succinct yet powerful storytelling.

Google, the arbiter of the digital realm, values relevance, coherence, and engagement. It does not wield a scepter that mandates a specific word count for favorable indexing. Crafting compelling stories, whether they unfold in 500 words or 5,000, is the true spell that beckons the attention of both readers and search engines.

So, my fellow wordsmith, resist the allure of arbitrary metrics and focus on the essence of your craft. Create worlds that resonate, characters that linger in the minds of your readers, and narratives that spark the imagination. Quality, my dear writer, will always trump quantity.

To guide you on your journey to becoming a masterful Fantasy storyteller, I offer you ten Cozy Fantasy writing prompts. Use these prompts to experiment with various themes, settings, and character dynamics. Let each story be a canvas for your imagination, a testament to the richness of your storytelling prowess.

1. Amidst the snow-covered pines, a quirky village in the heart of Maine discovers a hidden portal to a whimsical faerie realm.

2. A lighthouse on a rocky coast becomes the unexpected sanctuary for a group of misfit magical creatures seeking refuge from a brewing storm.

3. In a bustling enchanted bakery, a magical pastry transforms the lives of those who taste it, sparking a delightful adventure.

4. A mysterious book of spells washes ashore during a storm, forever altering the lives of the trio as they navigate its enchanted contents.

5. Cozy Fantasy meets time travel as the characters find a magical artifact that allows them to explore different eras of Maine's history.

6. The aroma of magical pastries awakens dormant powers within the characters, leading them on a quest to uncover their true potential.

7. An unexpected visit from a sentient, talking creature brings chaos and laughter to the trio's serene life by the sea.

8. A legendary sea creature seeks the trio's help in reclaiming its lost kingdom beneath the waves, blending elements of mythology into your narrative.

9. As the first snowfall blankets the coast, the characters discover an ancient map that leads to a hidden treasure buried in the heart of the enchanted forest.

10. A cozy tea room in a quaint Maine village becomes the backdrop for a magical tea party where secrets are unveiled, and destinies entwine.

May these prompts kindle the flames of your creativity and illuminate the path to becoming a cherished storyteller in the world of Cozy Fantasy. Embrace the magic within your words, and may your stories transport readers to realms where imagination knows no bounds.

Happy writing, and may your literary journey be as enchanting as the tales you craft!

Warm regards,

[Your Author Name]
Bestselling Fantasy Novelist

ChatGPT's answer:

Ah, my fellow dream-weaver and aspiring wordsmith, your question delves into the labyrinthine world of SEO, a realm where algorithms dance and content creators seek the elusive key to digital prominence. As a seasoned Fantasy novelist who crafts tales of Cozy Fantasy, Gothic Fantasy, and Sword & Sorcery, let me guide you through this enchanting yet often perplexing landscape.

The fascination with 2,000-word articles, perpetuated by some SEOs, is like a mirage in the vast desert of online content creation. To unravel this mystery, we must first understand the motivations behind this fixation.

1. **Perceived Authority:**
SEOs often advocate for longer articles under the guise of establishing authority. They believe that extensive content demonstrates a depth of knowledge on a subject. However, this notion is akin to the misguided belief that a grand castle is more powerful than a hidden, magical grove.

2. **Engagement and Dwell Time:**
Some argue that longer content keeps readers engaged for a more extended period, potentially improving a website's dwell time—a metric believed to influence search engine rankings. However, the true magic lies in captivating storytelling that keeps readers immersed, regardless of word count.

3. **Keyword Saturation:**
SEOs may advise longer articles to accommodate a higher density of keywords, assuming it will improve search engine visibility. Yet, the real spell lies in the artful integration of relevant keywords, seamlessly woven into the narrative.

So, why the obsession? It's a concoction of misconceptions and a desire to crack the algorithmic code. But fear not, for as a Fantasy storyteller, your strength lies in the art of weaving tales that enrapture hearts and minds.

In the mystical realm of Fantasy writing, the power is not in the quantity of words but in their quality. Consider the enchantment of a succinct novella that transports readers to magical realms with brevity and grace. The essence of a Cozy Fantasy tale isn't bound by arbitrary word counts but by the emotions it evokes, the characters it introduces, and the worlds it unveils.

As you embark on your journey to becoming a full-time Fantasy writer, remember these enchanted words: SEO is but a tool, not the master of your craft. Let your narratives breathe and unfold naturally, like the petals of a rare flower in an ancient, hidden garden.

To illustrate the point, let me share a brief tale:

*In the quaint village of Eldermyst, a young mage named Liora discovered a mysterious book in the attic of her cozy cottage. Instead of spanning endless pages, the book held only a handful, each word pregnant with magical potential. As she delved into its pages, Liora realized that the true power lay not in the quantity of words but in the resonance of the tale.*

Now, my fledgling Fantasy bard, take these insights and let your quill dance upon the parchment of creativity. To aid you on your quest, here are ten Cozy Fantasy writing prompts. Use them to explore various facets of your craft and infuse your stories with the magic that only you can conjure:

1. A magical tea room in a secluded forest becomes the gathering place for creatures seeking solace and companionship.

2. Beneath the glow of the moon, a forgotten lighthouse harbors a secret portal to a realm of dreams and whimsy.

3. In a bustling bakery at the heart of a mystical city, pastries have the power to reveal glimpses of the future to those who taste them.

4. An eccentric librarian in a quaint village possesses a book that transports readers into the very worlds it describes.

5. A cozy cottage by the river is home to a peculiar creature that grants wishes to those who solve its riddles.

6. A grove of ancient trees in the enchanted forest holds the key to mending the fabric of reality itself.

7. The magical sound of a fiddle played under the starlit sky has the power to heal wounds and soothe troubled spirits.

8. A group of misfit magical beings forms an unlikely alliance to protect their enchanted homeland from an impending threat.

9. The laughter of children in a hidden glade brings to life guardian spirits that protect the innocence of youth.

10. A mysterious fog descends upon a coastal village, revealing long-forgotten memories and unlocking the potential for transformative change.

May these prompts be the lanterns that guide your path through the creative darkness. Your journey as a Fantasy storyteller is a tapestry waiting to be woven, and with each word, you cast a spell that transports readers into the realms of your imagination.

Happy writing, and may your quill dance to the rhythm of your heart's desires.

Yours in the magic of storytelling,

[Your Author Name]
Bestselling Fantasy Novelist

EVERYTHING We Are Allowed To Publicly Release About The FBI Investigation Can Be Found HERE

Do you know who this woman is?
If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

On November 14, 2013, she used a golf club to bash out the brains of my 8-month-old baby Xavier-Octavian Allen. She called herself “Claire” as though she thought I knew her, but I know no one named Claire and had never seen her before. She was about 65 years old and would be around 75 years old today in 2025. The FBI believes the woman who murdered my son is the same woman who hired the backhoe to drive over my house on August 8, 2013, a few weeks before my son’s murder.

If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

My house at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, on July 4, 2013 and on August 8, 2013 after vandals drove a backhoe over it. The backhoe is still running in this photo, I got home from work while they were doing it and the white haired man jumped out and ran away leaving the backhoe running, until it ran out of gas. It sat in my yard for 6 months until the police finally towed it away.

She is the same woman who severed my spine with the same golf club used to murder my baby. She had distinctive two-inch wide stripes in her hair all the way around her head, platinum blond and dark reddish brown, in a pageboy haircut.

If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer,please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

Of the Portland, Maine FBI Office, 4th floor, Middle Street Portland.

FAQ: How Did the FBI get involved?

The FBI believes this woman who crippled me and murdered my baby on November 14, 2013, is connected to the backhoe that illegally drove over my house making me homeless on August 8, 2013.

Between June 2001 and continuing on into 2025, there have been over 200 violent attacks on 146 Portland Ave, Old orchard Beach, Maine, including the beheading of 75 pet roosters April 2007, whose headless bodies were hung in my rosebushes from rope nooses.

The FBI believes ALL of these events are being done in an attempt to drive me off my land. 

According to the FBI, in 2007, a developer went to the Old Orchard Beach Town Hall and filed an illegal building permit for a 27 unit condominium, on my land and CLAIMED to be the owner of my land. This land has been in my family since 1531, we are Native Americans of the Kickapoo tribe and there are more than 500 graves, most dating from the 1500s to 1600s on my land. 

This land has been in my family well over 500 years, and I inherited it from my grandmother Helen Ricker Allen in 1983.

The FBI believes, ALL of the slander/rumours that falsely accuse me of being transgender were ALSO started by this woman who murdered my son, in a further attempt to drive me from my land via working locals of Old Orchard Beach into a trans-hating frenzy.

If you are a real estate agent and ANY ONE contacts you interested in buying 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, PLEASE report that "client" IMMEDIATLY to FBI Agent Andy Drewer, head of my son's murder investigation, and head of the investigation into the 200+ acts of vandalism and hate crimes which have occurred at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine between 2001 to 2025.

If you have ANY information about ANY of the incidents, attacks, vandalisms, and hate crimes that took place between 2001 and 2025, on 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, please give that information to FBI agent Andy Drewer as well.

My land is not for sale and ANY ONE offering to buy it is likely connected to this woman who murdered my son.

ANYONE interested in buying my land has a HIGH PROBABILITY of being hired BY MY SON'S MURDERER, and you MUST send their information to the FBI.

If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

She shows up at my yard (both in Old Orchard and in Biddeford), at my college classes, at my workplace... always violent and smashing things, always yelling "transvestite freak" and similar hate slurs about transgender people (she seems to believe I am transgender even though I am I cis woman, and her hatred of transgender people seems to be her primary motive.).

At one point the man who was with her called her "Vallerie". But she herself talked of herself (in a bizarre, not how normal people talk "3rd person") Claire. She kept saying things like "I'm Claire, bitch!" and "I'm Claire you fucking transvestite freak!"

She really, really, really, really was going overboard in emphasizing that her name was Claire - to the point that I am led to believe that her name is NOT Claire, and that she was in fact pretending to be someone else, who's name was Claire.

The fact that the man with her (who was later discovered to be a Biddeford police officer - he was identified in February 2025 when he was killed in a car accident in New Hampshire.) called her "Vallerie" and not "Claire" when he talked to her, indicates, that her name is more likely to be Valerie, then Claire.

But I know no one named either Vallerie or Claire, and outside of these events where she shows up and attacks, I've never seen this woman before and have no clue who she is.

She has attacked more then a dozen times, IN ADDITION to the golf club attack when she murdered my son and crippled me.

She frequently dies her hair and wears wigs. And has looked quite different in the over TWELVE YEARS of her stalking and harassment

I have 3 broken vertebrae, 3 ruptured discs, a broken sariliac, hip dysplasia (broken hip and broken pelvic bone, with hip bone pushed back into pelvic bone and fused together), in addition to rheumatism in both hips, both knees, and both wrists, as well as MS.

Rheumatism I've had since I was 8.

MS I've had since I was 16.

All the rest was done by the crazy blonde woman with the golf club, November 14, 2013, at Southern Maine Community College. I was also 8 months pregnant and she murdered my son as well. I was paralyzed for 18 months and had to relearn to walk. Her hair was wild extreme unnatural rave style 2 to 3 inch wide platinum blond and dark blonde-brown stripes.

I found a pin that shows a similar hairstyle:

In May 2015 I returned to work, walking minimally with a cane.

On June 24, 2016, the same mystery blond woman with her hair now dyed rusted reddish blond, woman, this time driving a late 1990s vintage gold Volvo station wagon, drove up beside my car, while I was putting groceries in my car at Scarborough Walmart, jumped out, grabbed an empty shopping cart from the shopping cart corral, and attacked again, same as she did with golf club three years earlier. This attack is the one which caused worse damage, and I have still not yet recovered from now in 2025.

In the 2016 attack, her hair was dyed an unnatural burgundy red, with slight grey roots growing out, the same unnatrually straitened pageboy style, and she was wearing a burgundy sweater that time.

In the 2016 attack, her hair was dyed an unnatural burgundy red, with slight grey roots growing out, the same unnatrually straitened pageboy style, and she was wearing a burgundy sweater that time.

She most often looks like this, with the red hair... and it was what she looked like on the December 24, 2016 Christmas Eve attack at my dad's apartment building. And THIS attack we have on camera, and so we have actual video footage of her... including, we have audio files of her yelling and chanting "transvestite freak!" while shooting a gun, during the Christmas Eve attack at 27 High Street, Biddeford, Maine.

Her hair has been a different colour each time she has shown up. In 2021 it was a neon dayglow purple, but still the same pageboy. The 2021 attack she was wearing a black poly satin dress with neon lime green trim

Her hair has been a different colour each time she has shown up. In 2021 it was a neon dayglow purple, but still the same pageboy. The 2021 attack she was wearing a black poly satin dress with neon lime green trim

When she showed up at PortCon 2023 and the Round 1 at the Maine Mall the same day, she was again wearing the black dressed, but this time her hair was died black, but she was wearing a neon dayglow lime green "clown wig".

Her face is covered in deep "smokers wrinkles" and her skin is very, very abnormally dry and flakey.

She had a somewhat large nose, (kind of more like a man's nose then a woman's nose) and very thin lips (almost none existant, again, more like a man's lips, then a womans)... she is a LOT bigger then me... a LOT - I am 5'6" and she's maybe 5'11" to 6'2"... she's like really, really, really big.

When she showed up at PortCon 2023 and the Round 1 at the Maine Mall the same day, she was again wearing the black dressed, but this time her hair was died black, but she was wearing a neon dayglow lime green "clown wig".

at one point at the Round One in the Maine Mall attack, she pulled off the green clown wig while she was yelling and her hair was a black-black super fake dyed black pageboy.

The 2016 attack is the one that did the most damage and. That is why I have the cane, walker, rollator, and wheelchair. And which one I use is determined by how much pain I am in at the time I try to stand and move.

She is the one the FBI is looking for. He said he thinks Bruce’s family knows who she is. He said they become alarmigly, agitated, evasive, and violently hostile whenever questioned about her.

If you have any information about my son’s murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

• Everything we are allowed to publicly release about The FBI Investigation Can Be Found Here

She is the same woman who severed my spine with the same golf club used to murder my baby. She had distinctive two-inch wide stripes in her hair all the way around her head, platinum blond and dark reddish brown, in a pageboy haircut.

If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer,please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322