Pink Marabou Trimmed Rainbow Leg Warmers, a Purple Feathered Black Leather Codpiece, and an Emerald Green Overly Fluffy Scarf
a LitRPG fiction short

Pink Marabou Trimmed Rainbow Leg Warmers, a Purple Feathered Black Leather Codpiece, and an Emerald Green Overly Fluffy Scarf

The old theatre loomed over the street like a forgotten relic of a brighter age. Its once-grand neon marquee sagged under the weight of ice, the letters faded and broken — “GRA D O ENING T NIGHT” — barely visible beneath a crust of snow.

“Looks like the zombie plague hit it on opening night,” Quaraun said as he stared up at the theatre ruins. “Pity. I like theatres.”

Massive icicles dangled from the collapsed awning, glittering ominously in the dim streetlight.

Quaraun stepped carefully over the threshold, the hem of his pink silk robe brushing against frost-laden carpet. His twelve foot long silver hair drifted around his shoulders, tendrils curling in the chill. The theatre smelled of mildew and decay, and the faintest undercurrent of something darker — rot beneath the sweetness of stale popcorn.

BoomFuzzy followed behind, his cyber goggles flashing faintly in the dark.

Quaraun sniffed the air, crinkling his nose.

“This place stinks like mouldy moth balls.”

GhoulSpawn trailed behind them, hands shoved deep in the pockets of his green velvet coat.

“Well, it is abandoned. We’re lucky the roof’s still intact.”

Quaraun swept his gaze over the wreckage — shattered seats, broken glass, tattered velvet curtains.

“We are wasting our time. This place was looted already. You can see that.”

“Nay, Love.” BoomFuzzy’s goggles clicked as they adjusted. “I found somethin’. Come on.” He pointed toward the dressing rooms behind the stage. “Back there.”

Quaraun’s rabbit-like ears twitched nervously, the chains on his earrings jingling faintly.

“Unicorn… if you are leading me toward a corpse — “

“Nae, Love. Trust me.” BoomFuzzy stepped ahead. “It’s somethin’ good. Found this place last night while You and Ghouly was resting in the tavern. Ya gonna like this.”

GhoulSpawn hesitated, hooves clinking faintly on the frozen floor, glancing toward the darkened aisles.

“I dunno, guys. Places like this usually have squatters. Or worse. How do we know there are no zombies in here?”

“I am The Pink Necromancer, Wizard of the Di’Jinn Order, I KNOW when there are zombies nearby.”

BoomFuzzy ignored him, disappearing behind the curtain.

Quaraun sighed and followed, his pink silk robes whispering over the debris-strewn floor.

Beyond the curtain, the dressing room was somehow intact — the cracked mirrors were rimmed with frost, but the makeup lights still flickered dimly above them. Dust coated the vanity tables, and faded costumes hung limply from racks pushed against the wall.

BoomFuzzy knelt beside an overturned trunk, rummaging through the clutter.

“Aha!” He pulled out a clearly BDSM black leather codpiece, decorated with delicate purple feathers. He held it up triumphantly. “See? Good shit!”

Quaraun stared.

“You cannot be serious.”

BoomFuzzy flipped it over and held it toward him.

“Label says +5 Seduction.” His grin widened. “Confidence boost included.”

“You are not seriously going to wear that?”

“Aye, I am.” BoomFuzzy was already untying his hakama.

GhoulSpawn rolled his eyes but didn’t stop him, while Quaraun stared lustfully at his husband’s naked body.

“Ooh!” GhoulSpawn lifted an enormous green scarf from a nearby table. It was absurdly fluffy, practically vibrating with static, and at least twenty feet long. “Check this out! A green Dr. Who scarf! Awesome! So much Tom Baker vibes!”

“Who?”

“He’s an actor from my time. You wouldn’t know him.”

“Oh.” Quaraun was barely listening. He was still entranced by BoomFuzzy’s bold nakedness.

“Look at it!” GhoulSpawn said.

“What?”

“Over here. On the other side of the room, no where’s near BoomFuzzy’s crotch.”

Quaraun turned to see what GhoulSpawn was yapping about. Quaraun’s delicate fingers brushed the tag.

“Emerald Green Overly Fluffy Scarf… +3 Warmth, -2 Visibility.” He raised an eyebrow. “You will be blind.”

“But warm!” GhoulSpawn wrapped it around his head. “And cozy! With Whovian fashion!”

“And a danger to yourself and others,” Quaraun murmured.

“More so then he already is,” BoomFuzzy added. “Last thing our resident klutz needs is MORE clumsiness.”

“Are you just walk around naked the rest of the day?” GhoulSpawn asked.

“Aye. That do be the plan.”

BoomFuzzy shimmied his hips, causing his long fluffy purple tail to swirl seductively around his ankles.

“And this,” BoomFuzzy said, lifting another item from the trunk. He held it toward Quaraun — a pair of pink marabou-trimmed rainbow leg warmers.

Quaraun’s blue eyes widened. He took them carefully, stroking the soft pink feathers.

“These are exquisite.”

“Aye.” BoomFuzzy tapped the label with one thick finger. “Knew ya’d like ‘em.”

“Says +2 Moxie, +1 Cold Resistance. For when the apocalypse gets FABULOUS.” Quaraun smiled faintly. “Well… if the apocalypse is going to kill me, I should at least look flawless.”

BoomFuzzy leaned in, his lips brushing Quaraun’s ear.

“Aye. And with that +2 Moxie, ya might even survive me lusting after ya...”

Quaraun slid the leg warmers up beneath his robe, the marabou trim brushing his calves. Warmth bloomed immediately against his frozen skin. His long silver hair drifted over his shoulders, curling in contentment.

BoomFuzzy fastened the purple feathered, black leather codpiece around his waist, adjusting the leather straps with far too much smugness.

“How do I look?” the little chubby Phooka asked.

Quaraun’s gaze swept down his husband’s stocky little frame.

“Lethal.”

“And seductive.” BoomFuzzy struck a lewd pose, his purple crotch feathers fluttering.

“Help!” GhoulSpawn tripped over the scarf and landed face-first on the floor. “I’m gonna die. How do you wear this thing?”

“Well ya’ll die warm,” BoomFuzzy said cheerfully.

Quaraun smiled, the marabou trim around his ankles swishing as he turned toward the door.

“Let us see if these items work as advertised.”

BoomFuzzy’s grin widened.

“Oh, I’ll make sure they do.”

Quaraun’s blue eyes darkened.

“I am counting on it.”

Outside, Quaraun’s marabou-trimmed leg warmers sparkled under the dim streetlights, the rainbow sheen shimmering through the frost-laced air. His long, prehensile silver jellyfish tentacle hair twitched and coiled around his shoulders, tendrils glimmering with frost. Quaraun lifted the hem of his resplendent rhinestone encrusted pink silk robe slightly, admiring the soft fluff hugging his calves.

“I am fabulous,” Quaraun whispered, mostly to himself. He turned his leg slightly to catch the light on the glittering fibres. “Utterly fabulous.”

“Aye, ya are, Love,” BoomFuzzy purred, draping his arm around Quaraun’s shoulders. “Yer always fabulous, but those leg warmers? Chef’s kiss.”

He made a dramatic smooching gesture with his hand. The purple feathers on his codpiece brushed against Quaraun’s hip as he leaned in closer.

Quaraun’s gaze slid downward. His pink-tinted cheeks darkened to a soft mauve. The codpiece was the only thing BoomFuzzy was wearing.

“You are wearing that in public?”

BoomFuzzy grinned, his gold plated, diamond encrusted teeth flashing beneath his thick wooly beard.

“Why not? +5 Seduction, Sweetheart. I feel like I could charm the pants off a Frost Dragon right now.”

Quaraun’s gaze lingered on the black leather and purple plumes.

“I would prefer you charm the pants off me.”

“Yis do no wear pants.”

“Right now, neither are you.”

“Lusting over me bikini armour, eh?”

“Practically drooling. I feel like butter on a hot day.”

BoomFuzzy chuckled, nuzzling his face into Quaraun’s jellyfish hair.

“Later, Love. When we ain’t standin’ in the ruins surrounded by zombies, aye?”

Quaraun sighed dramatically.

“You are a terrible tease, Unicorn.”

“I can be more so.”

BoomFuzzy seductively bit Quaraun’s long pointed ear.

“You are horny.”

“For yar big pearly white arse, always.”

BoomFuzzy slapped Quaraun’s bum.

Behind them, GhoulSpawn stumbled into a snowbank with a muffled whump. The enormous emerald green scarf swaddled his head and horns, draped over his shoulders, the ends trailing down behind him like two twelve foot long capes, leaving only the tips of his nose and long floppy lamb ears exposed.

“I can’t see!” GhoulSpawn flailed his arms helplessly, the scarf nearly swallowing his face. “Help!”

“Because it gives ya -2 Visibility,” BoomFuzzy reminded him cheerfully.

“I KNOW.” GhoulSpawn spun blindly in a circle, nearly toppling over.

“Well, take it off, ya eejit.”

“But it’s soooo warm, and so Whovian, so I’m not taking it off!” He adjusted the scarf, only for it to slink back down over his face. “It’s so warm and snuggly!”

“You look like a lost Christmas tree,” Quaraun said, leaning into BoomFuzzy’s side as his husband’s arm curled around his waist.

“Yes, well, I’d rather be a warm Christmas tree from a Dr. Who Christmas special, than a frozen corpse,” GhoulSpawn replied, bumping into a lamppost. “Ow! Who put that lamp there?”

Quaraun lifted the hem of his robe again, admiring his shimmering leg warmers.

“I am perfectly warm. And exquisitely fashionable.”

BoomFuzzy’s silver eyes glinted beneath his cyber goggles.

“I could warm ya up even more, Love. If ya like.”

Quaraun arched a delicate silver brow.

“Oh?”

“Aye.” BoomFuzzy tugged at the waistband of his codpiece with an exaggerated flourish, the feathers trembling. “After all, confidence is seductive.”

Quaraun’s crystal blue eyes sparkled. His tentacle hair drifted toward BoomFuzzy, curling playfully around his waist.

“You know… the label does not say where that +5 Seduction has to be applied.”

BoomFuzzy’s grin widened.

“Well then, Love,” BoomFuzzy said, guiding Quaraun toward the nearest building. “Let’s go test it see what this codpiece can do…”

Quaraun’s laughter trailed after them as BoomFuzzy swept him into the shadows.

GhoulSpawn muttered something, still fighting with the scarf, but neither Quaraun nor BoomFuzzy heard what it was.Inventory Updated:Achievments:Character Stats:

• +2 Pink Marabou Trimmed Rainbow Leg Warmers Added to Inventory — Fabulousness increased by 20%.
• +1 Purple Feathered Black Leather Codpiece Added to Inventory — Confidence up, shame down.
• +1 Emerald Green Overly Fluffy Scarf Added to Inventory — GhoulSpawn can no longer see, but at least he’s cute.
• +7 Feather Debris Added to Inventory — Everywhere. Seriously. BoomFuzzy can’t sit down without molting. (Everywhere, forever — you’ll never get rid of it)

• Achievement Unlocked: Apocalyptic Fashionistas! — Looted a haunted theatre and walked away in style.
• Achievement Unlocked: “Dressed to Kill (Literally)” — Because nothing says survival like a strategic bikini armour codpiece.
• Achievement Unlocked: Confidence level: Leather BDSM Codpiece Worn in Public.

• +4 Mothball Scent Added to all 3 — Cursed theatre vibes: unlocked.
• +3 Dignity Loss (-3 Dignity) Added to all 3— Mostly BoomFuzzy’s fault.
• Quaraun gained +5 Drama — Because nothing says “theatre” like marabou trim.
• Quaraun gained +4 Theatrical Flair — And now no one can out dress him.
• BoomFuzzy gained +69 Confidence — Might be strutting like a peacock for a while.
• GhoulSpawn gained -3 Coordination — Walking blindfolded is harder than it looks.

1. Moral of the Story: When the world ends, it’s better to be overdressed than under prepared. Just because it’s the end of the world doesn’t mean you can’t look good.

Quaraun and BoomFuzzy

The Pink Necromancer, Moon Elf silk weaver & merchant: Quaraun on Noodle Beach. His master chef Phooka turned Lich husband: BoomFuzzy with his 1968 VW Bus Beach Noodle Food Truck. And their on again/off again mad scientist Sheep Demon lover: GhoulSpawn with his 1974 AMC Gremlin time machine. Time Travel setting swings back and forth between 40th century Maine after a comet hit the moon decimating the planet, and the 1970s, Maine. Quaraun in the main character, he and BoomFuzzy are a married gay couple. GhoulSpawn is their shared live-in lover. Art by Wendy Christine Allen.

BoomFuzzy

Quaraun

GhoulSpawn and BoomFuzzy

GhoulSpawn

GhoulSpawn and Quaraun

Faeries vs Elves (In The Quaraun Series) A Pink Necromancer World Lore Post

The Pink Necromancer: The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane aka The Twighlight Manor Series

🌸🦄🌸 Furry Yaoi Fiction about Elves and Faeries and Satyrs and Demons and Unicorns and Technomancer Wizards and Liches living in a Lighthouse and surviving as Travelling Merchants and Food Truck Chefs in Cyberpunk Dystopian 40th Century Maine, and Zombie Apocalypse and Time Travel but it’s Slice of Life Vignettes of Mundane Daily Lives of The UnSeelie Court’s Royal Family trying to survive after a comet hit the moon and turned the Earth into a CyberPunk Ice-Age. 🌸🦄🌸

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