Looking to connect with me on social media? Links to all my official accounts can be found here:

<<<<---  If it is not on that list, it is not me. 

Please note that since 2013, there have shown up several FAKE "EelKat" accounts, often using photos stolen from my website. Those accounts are run by a stalker who also goes by the names Kendra Silvermander & Tom Addams. The identity of both is unknown and it is believed to be one person using 2 different online names. They are wanted by the FBI, not only for stalking, impersonation, and identity theft, but also for the bomb that blew up my house, the attempted murder of my dad, twice the attempted murder of me, and the attempted murder of my brother, so if you run across one of these fake accounts pretending to be me, please report it to the FBI Agent in charge of the case: Andy Drewer @ (207) 774-9322

Don't put flyers on people's cars...

/ /




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A common question I get asked is: “What do you think of putting flyers on cars? I can print up 500 of them off my printer for about $20 and there’s a WalMart just down the street. Wow! Just think, by the end of the week thousands of people will know about my book! Isn’t this a great idea? Why hasn’t anyone else thought of it?

What do I think?

Flyers on cars works - IF you tape the flyers to your own car. Otherwise they could land you in jail.

Yes, you heard me: jail. It’s illegal to solicit on private property. Private property includes businesses and their parking lots. Being a public place open for business, does not mean it is not still private property owned by private citizens. But the law doesn’t stop there: a car is private property as well.

If you get caught putting flyers on cars, LEGALLY the judge has the right to charge you a fine for EACH trespassing offence committed. In other words if you go to 1 parking lot and place 500 flyers on 500 cars, that is NOT 1 trespassing offence, but rather 501 counts of tampering with private property! The average fine for such an offence is $500, which means, the judge could make you pay 501 $500 fines for a grand total of a $250,500. Still think it’s worth the risk?

I tape a pair of flyers to my car windows - back doors. This works wonders as I get 30 or 40 people minimum gathering to look at my car every time I stop at any store (it's got 2.5 million beads and marbles glued to it and shimmers like a giant disco ball). My car is my best sales gimmick ever (wasn't intended to be that way, but I figured, hey, people are flocking to my car anyways, might as well take advantage of it and let folks know I've got a few books they can read.)

Putting flyers on other people's cars though - actually, there is a law against that, at least in Maine, and there's a $500 fine (to the town in question), in addition to any "no solicitation" fines the owners of the parking lot may have (most stores/businesses have "no solicitation" clearly posted on the front door and that includes cars parked in their lot, not just in their store!)

If you drive into WalMart and most other big box stores, you will see signs posted on lamp posts that say “No solicitation on premises” - these are targeted directly at flyers on windshields.

I knew one woman who got a restraining order put on her by the store in question, and I knew a guy who did jail time for it.

I've known people (more than once) getting sued by car owners, claiming the ink ran and ruined the paint on their white Cadillac (it was the same guy both times, same Cadillac, he won, because the car was his private property and putting a flyer on it, was classified as "trespassing").It was a 1973 Eldorado by the way. Gorgeous car, and yes, the ink really did bleed off the paper in the early morning dew and stain the paint. This guy lives down the street from me, fellow car collector, showed me the car, and there it was plain as day: a mirror image of the flyer "stamped" onto his nice white fender. Dr. Larochele by the way, yes, the man who inspired the character Rycliff Liore aka Caddie Larochele in my Twighlight Manor series. He was also the original owner of The Goldeneagle - he's the guy I bought it from. Now you understand why I write Caddie as utterly obsessed with the paint job of his car.

There was another time a guy called the number on a flyer to demand the company replace the wipers on his car, claiming whoever put the flyer on his car had broken the wiper doing so.

And when you read as many Amazon book reviews for self-published books as do, it doesn't take long before you know which authors are putting flyers on cars. How can you tell? By the 1 star reviews which read: "Don't buy books from this hack, he's been littering up the neighborhood with his flyers. I got one on my car this morning. Not only did I not buy the book, I'm making sure to tell everyone I can not to buy it. I came here to look him up on Amazon to make sure I warned people."

Flyers on car windows used to be a big thing around here, and for years it was not unusual to come out of the store to find more than one flyer stuck under your wiper. It got to be a hassle, most of them ended up on the ground as drivers would just toss them and drive off, and a couple of times it caused accidents as folks wouldn't always take them off before driving away and they'd fly up and block the view while driving.

Biddeford is the town that really started cracking down on it. Biddeford has a WalMart and a Target and a BestBuy and several other such places. Lots of big lots, with lots of cars. Biddeford became a prime target for every small business with an office printer. Do you know how Biddeford put an end once and for all to flyers on cars? By enforcing the $250 per item littering fine.

First the city boldly posted "Welcome to Biddeford - Do not litter. Fines $250 per item." These signs are BIG, BIG, BIG and they are posted on every street that crosses town lines. Than Biddeford PD recruited a whole new parking crew complete with 3 brand new aditional meter-maid cruisers.

Yep, the little meter-maids in their 3-wheel parking cruisers got busy collecting up every single flyer (which conveniently listed names, addresses, and phone numbers of the offending businesses) counted them up, and than sent bill for littering to the owners of the business - bills to the tune of 1 ticket per flyer and each ticket equaled a $250 fine. Small businesses found themselves owing the City of Biddeford several thousand dollars in littering fines.

Of course, people standing on the sidewalks smoking, also found themselves fined $250 for each but they dropped. Biddeford PD didn't exclude anybody when they started enforcing the no littering law. And the city is much cleaner now than it was a few years ago as a result, and nary a car flyer to be seen.

If you have a permit to do so and/or permission from the business owner, you can stand out front of a business and hand flyers to people coming out, but it's rare that a business allows this.

I don't know about other states, but putting flyers on cars is a great big huge ILLEGAL no-no here in Maine.

In short flyers on cars is nothing but bad JuJu. It's very bad for business.




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By EelKat Wendy C Allen







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And why 27 books were deleted off Amazon after being banned by The Old Orchard Beach, Maine Town Hall, an American Government organization, on January 4, 2016, for being "Too Gay For The Family Friendly Town of Old Orchard Beach".






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The Top 202 Most Visited Pages of 2017

Seeing how on October 15, 2017, we reached 10,000 pages, I thought it'd be fun to update the Top 100 List and see where were were now.

Top 202 Most Viewed Pages Of 2017 So Far
(Out of 10,000 pages)

(January 2017 to October 2017)
(Excluding the Home PageAbout Page, and Site Map Page, which were the top 3)

  1. Amphibious Aliens: The Story of Etiole & The World's Most Haunted Car
  2. The GoldenEagle: An Auto-biography of the World's Most Haunted Car
  3. Medieval Servants: Their jobs and their place in historical fiction.
  4. How Long is 50,000 Words?
  5. On being a handicapped CosPlayer at PortCon Maine 2017
  6. Stephen King's The Thinner and The Gypsies Of Old Orchard Beach, Maine
  7. Writing Mute Characters
  8. Flamboyant Nipples: The KKK's New Gay Hating Site About Old Orchard Beach | The Site That Makes Fun of Terrorist Hate Crimes
  9. Writing Dares Random Generator
  10. Don't put flyers on people's cars...
  11. The Saco River Curse
  12. Our Primary Site Topic Is Small Penis? Reaching #1 on Page 1 of Google.
  13. Help FBI End Anti-Gay White Power Terrorist Attacks of Old Orchard Beach
  14. Creating Character Profiles | Meet The Characters | Who Is Quaraun?
  15. Introduction To The Quaraun Series: aka Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach
  16. The Dazzling Razzberry aka EelKat's Autism Awareness Car
  17. Autism, Asperger, PTSD, & Mad Cow: Writing Clinical Insanity Accurately | What is wrong with Quaraun? 
  18. Quaraun Free To Read Online Complete Chapter Index In Chronological Order
  19. Necromancy: Fact Vs Fiction; Or How Can You Be A Necromancer In Real Life?
  20. 600 Pages: Epic Big Super Sized Novels and Why You Should Never Write One
  21. Why Crude Adult Comedy and Pink Humor Yaoi Is Not Erotica
  22. The FBI In Old Orchard Beach, Maine Trying To Capture A Domestic Terrorist
  23. One Gypsy's Review of My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding
  24. The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - page 1 (Online Release of Banned Book)
  25. Autism, Asperger's, And The Danger of The Self-Diagnosis
  26. Spell Casting Side Effects: Magic In Quaraun's Universe | Author Interview
  27. What Type of Music Does A Gypsy Listen To? My Top 10 Favorite Bands
  28. Beware of White Men In Gypsy Clothing: Fake Psychic Scams
  29. How long does it take to hit 1667 words?
  30. How to Write A Kiss
  31. Phookas
  32. Creating Character Profiles | Meet The Characters | Who Is GhoulSpawn?
  33. Albino Races - Moon Elves In The Quaraun Series
  34. Daily Writing Prompts (June 2017 Archive)
  35. My 30th Anniversary of Being Transgender
  36. Why Are The Quaraun Books Rated M18+
  37. How to Write Hot Sex - Tips For Erotic Romance Authors
  38. The Zaharam-Chapelle-Parunas Ethnographical World Building Questionnaire
  39. The Jiggler & The G-String Teddy Bears | The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane
  40. What exactly makes an Elf an Elf? (What is the definition of an Elf?)
  41. Online Income: The Reality vs The Fantasy
  42. World's Most Haunted Car Merchandise
  43. I Am Not GhoulSpawn | Excerpt From Rose Garden of The Pink Necromancer
  44. Old Orchard Beach Hate Crimes
  45. BoomFuzzy Chapter 1 (Novel Excerpt - Quaraun The Insane)
  46. How can your books have gay transvestite characters and not be Erotica? or Why are gay haters beating up elderly woman for wearing pink for breast cancer awareness and saying she's a transexual because only transexuals wear pink?
  47. EelKat's Guide To NaNoWriMo Featuring The 13 Step Method To Writing
  48. Autism and the Stigmas - Why Can’t You Accept Me As Me?
  49. Maine UFO Sightings
  50. Page 11 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - The Scottish Traveller Crime Family
  51. Psychedelics In A 'High' High Fantasy World (High Elves Getting High)
  52. KBoards, The NaNoWriMo ML Rumor & The Vindictive Stalker
  53. Writing Racist Characters VS The Ku Klux Klan In Old Orchard Beach, Maine
  54. Captured By The Lich Lord | The Night of The Screaming Unicorn
  55. How To Build A Magic System
  56. I've everything but a kitchen sink. Wait, how'd that sink get in my pocket?
  57. Stephen King's Thinner Gypsies & The Ku Klux Klan of Old Orchard Beach
  58. Autistic Characters In Fiction
  59. City of The Slushies | Chapter 7 | Quaraun The Insane
  60. Manuscript Reading Services or Will You Read My Book and Tell Me What You Think?
  61. Suicide, Rape, and Abuse In The Quaraun Series
  62. Wizards vs Witches vs Sorcerers: How are they different? | Writing Fantasy Books
  63. FRED: Google's Most Deadly Update Ever?
  64. How To Write A Novel: Question Everything Before Putting It In Your World
  65. Content writing: How long do you spend creating a quality blog post?
  66. SBI: To Review or Not to Review? That Is The Question
  67. Twerking Dragons: The Joys Of Writing A Novel With A Voice Recorder
  68. A Day At Witch Pond & Fleeing To The Forest | Summoner of Darkness
  69. Transgender, Transsexual, Transvestite, or Intersex: What Is Quaraun?
  70. Sheep | GhoulSpawn The Crazed & The Rose Garden of The Pink Necromancer
  71. Colour Magic - Gypsy Style
  72. Ideas, Ideas, Ideas (Where Do You Get Them?)
  73. Keywords & Pigeons: How I Do Local Business Marketing
  74. Quaraun & Autism In Fantasy Novels
  75. The Signs Of Old Orchard Beach & The FBI Investigation Of The Town Hall
  76. Tom Addams & The Warrior's Forum
  77. A Field of Poppies On The Road To Witch Pond | Summoner of Darkness
  78. An Elf and a Lich in the Gingerbread Pit | The Night of The Screaming Unicorn
  79. Markiplier Jacksepticeye and Pewdiepie Play Resident Evil 7
  80. Santa Claus: Lich Of The North Pole (Includes NSFW 18+ CBT Yaoi scene)
  81. A Motorhome named 'No Hurry' becomes Rosebud & The Story of Ten Kidnapped Cats
  82. Create Original Content aka I Hate Jackass Gutter Scum Thieves
  83. Lost In a Space That Isn't There: Going North To Head South
  84. An Elf Gone Mad: The Rise of The Pink Necromancer
  85. Aspergers is NOT Autism
  86. Is The Quaraun Series Erotica? - No! Here's why...
  87. Summoner of Darkness: GhoulSpawn and Quaraun Trapped With A Phooka
  88. The Dungeon Master & The 1974 AMC Gremlin
  89. The Lich's True Form Revealed | The Night of The Screaming Unicorn
  90. Using work you already started for national novel writing month?
  91. World-building In The Quaraun Series: Creating a Fantasy World
  92. Books in Vacationland 2017
  93. BoomFuzzy's Gingerbread House From Hell
  94. Lets Playing Is No Longer Fun
  95. Santa's Floating Dead Body | A Scene From The Summoner of Darkness
  96. The Banshee Sisters: Bean-Nighe and Ben-Neeyah In the Swamp of Death
  97. The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - page 2 (Online Release of Banned Book)
  98. What vlogging equipment is needed to get started as a YouTube vlogger?
  99. April 2015 Update: Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach: The Kidnapped Cats
  100. Betta Fish Aesthetic on Pinterest
  101. Domain Name Branding: Should You Put Your Brand Name In Your URL?
  102. Life As A YouTuber: How To Earn An Income From Making Videos
  103. Making YouTube Videos: How did you decide what content to make?
  104. Page 4 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  105. Twighilight Not Twilight
  106. YouTube Index
  107. Amphibious Aliens: My health since the stroke and Etiole . . .
  108. Are You A Satan Worshiper?
  109. Average Typing Speed
  110. Custom Leggings - Designs By EelKat
  111. Ernest Hemingway Style of Writing Literary Fiction Used In Epic Fantasy Novels
  112. Google Flagged Your Site! What To Do? (Help For Web Masters)
  113. How valuable is a writer’s group?
  114. Lives Destroyed: Amphibious Aliens 10th Anniversary Update
  115. Lost In a Space That Isn't There: Santa's Letter To Satan
  116. Summoner of Darkness: Quaraun Meets The Gremlin
  117. The Terrorists of Old Orchard Beach Put My Dad In a Coma
  118. Using Yahoo Answers to promote your book and author website.
  119. What Is This Site?
  120. You Stole My Idea - I was writing a book, but you already wrote it 10 years ago!
  121. City of The Slushies | Chapter 1 | Quaraun The Insane
  122. Creative Writing Story Prompts: September 2017 Edition
  123. Dungeons and Dragons: The Joys Of Calculating Gold Weight In AD&D 2ed
  124. Fabric Designed By EelKat
  125. My Fave YouTubers Play: Dream Daddy - The Yaoi Dad Dating Sim Otome Game
  126. Necromancy: How will resurrection affect society as a whole?
  127. Page 7 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  128. Pink Flowers Aesthetic on Pinterest
  129. The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - page 12 (Online Release of Banned Book)
  130. What will a traveler encounter on the roads in your world?
  131. Are you insane? Am I? Let's Find Out...
  132. Becoming A Better Writer: How to write interesting dialogue.
  133. Character Creation
  134. Copper Cockeral Cards & Gifts
  135. Elves, Drugs, and Opium: A Look At The Drug Use In The Quaraun Books
  136. How To Stay Motivated To Write | Writing Fantasy Books
  137. Jewelry Fashions in Moon Elf Culture | World Building | Writing Fantasy Books
  138. Keyword Marketing - What to do when your best keywords are low demand
  139. Magic Systems and How to Build Them | Writing Fantasy Books
  140. NaNoWriMo Overachievers: How did you do it?
  141. Quaraun Cover Art Gallery | Fantasy Novel Book Cover Art
  142. Quaraun The Insane : Zebulon's Captive: The Last of The Moon Elves
  143. SEO Advantages of Embedding YouTube Videos On Your Website
  144. Summoner of Darkness: A Tavern Scene - Chastity Cages, and Whores
  145. Summoner of Darkness: The Return of ZooLock (free to read online)
  146. Twighlight Not Twilight Part 2
  147. Vanishing Books Update - Why 27 of my books were deleted off Amazon
  148. What is a God in Your Universe? | World Building | Writing Fantasy Books
  149. Writing Maine: How To Write About Maine Life Accurately
  150. What the Ocean Gives Me (How Things In Your Life Affect Your Writing)
  151. City of The Slushies | Chapter 14 | Quaraun The Insane
  152. February 10, 2008 - Harassment Continues in Old Orchard Beach, Maine
  153. How does a bestselling book become a bestseller?
  154. Marriage in Moon Elf Culture | World Building | Writing Fantasy Books
  155. People are not interested in long winded copy
  156. September 26, 2017 - The Latest Attack By The KKK on The Thinner Gypsies
  157. Spending Money To Make Money Online? Should You Do It?
  158. Summoner of Darkness: The Demon Cultists and The Coming of The Darkness
  159. Summoner of Darkness: The Map of The Town (novel free to read online)
  160. The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt GOTY | Completionist Run: Episode 01
  161. Trespassers: April 2007 Updates
  162. Turning Scenes, Into Stories & Writing Travelogue Style Fantasy Books
  163. Where To Get Endless Ideas For Short Stories, Novels, and Articles
  164. Writing Controversial Books: Political Correctness & White Supremacists
  165. Are Bad Reviews Good For You?
  166. Branding Yourself While Avoiding The Scams | EelKat On Content Writing
  167. Child Sacrifice in Fantasy Novels | Writing Fantasy Books
  168. How to Handle Writing Fantasy-Horror That Features Violence Against Children
  169. How would you explain your Fantasy world to a stranger?
  170. Page 6 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  171. Summoner of Darkness: HellBorne The Evil, Lord of Black Tower
  172. The return of Friends Are Forever - Banned and Burned it's about to be reborn!
  173. Why do Lovecraftian beings come to earth?
  174. Writing Prompts Syndrome?
  175. Autism = The Crazy Cat Woman of Maine
  176. Autism: Understanding what is really going on inside the child’s head.
  177. But what exactly IS a full time income?
  178. Content Marketing & writing: How I write content for my website
  179. Do you write a novel start-to-finish?
  180. GhoulSpawn and The Lich Lord's Lover: How To Kill a Lich
  181. How is it that the church leaders are claiming you do not pay tithes?
  182. How To Write A Novel: In what order do you create your world?
  183. I loved my children but I loved BoomFuzzy more | From Quaraun The Insane
  184. My Two Favorite People: FarDarrig and The Baby That Never Should Have Been
  185. Need help writing characters of color | EelKat on racist white readers
  186. Quaraun and the Amazon Adult Filter
  187. Quaraun GhoulSpawn and The Lich Lord's Lover: The Lover's Triangle
  188. Summoner of Darkness: Where Are You Hiding That Horse?
  189. Tired of people who don’t care. :( Tired of the harassment. :(
  190. What would happen if an Elf adopted a Human baby? | Writing Fantasy Books
  191. Page 10 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  192. Page 3 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  193. Page 8 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  194. SCRIPT FRENZY 2010: I WON! & Psycho Stalker Attacks
  195. Wristlets, Wrist Bags, Mini Clutch, Cosmetic Bags, and Designer Mini Purses
  196. Writing Your Novel: Do you save chapters as individual files?
  197. Are old AD&D adventures still any use to current players?
  198. Autistics Have Feelings Too & Diverse Books Rant
  199. Be True To You: YouTube Gamers: "Faking" a personality until you make it?
  200. City of The Slushies | Chapter 10 | Quaraun The Insane
  201. HEA in Erotica (Should You Write Happily Ever Afters?)
  202. Stephen King's Thinner Gypsies



dancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing banana


“Karma comes after everyone eventually. You can't get away with screwing people over your whole life, I don't care who you are. What goes aroMy Two Favorite People: FarDarrig and The Baby That Never Should Have Been

Need help writing characters of color | EelKat on racist white readers

und comes around. That's how it works. Sooner or later the universe will serve you the revenge that you deserve.” 

― Jessica Brody


"By autistic standards, the “normal” brain is easily distractible, is obsessively social, and suffers from a deficit of attention to detail and routine. Thus people on the spectrum experience the neurotypical world as relentlessly unpredictable and chaotic, perpetually turned up too loud, and full of people who have little respect for personal space." 

— Steve Silberman



Attempt Something New Today! – too many people talk about doing this or that but few actually take action, it's the why behind why so few succeed and so many fail.




I'm not made of money, I'm made out of glitter and kittens. 

~CinnamonToastKen 2017


“When people see you're happy doing what you're doing, it sort of takes the power away from them to tease you about it.” 

― Wendy Mass, Every Soul a Star




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