How to Write a Character Falling Asleep (First Person)? | Writing Dialogue



By Wendy C Allen
eelkat_red_scarf.jpgWendy Christine Allen, 2019, able to sit up in a chair for the first time in years, and able to raise up my arm and wiggle fingers. This was when I started playing Witcher 3 on Twitch as part of my physical therapy to regain finger movement. Playing Witcher 3 daily from 2016 to 2019, is how I regained the use of my thumb and two for fingers on my right hand... it is also why I stopped playing Witcher 3 in 2019, once I had strengthen my two forefingers enough to start typing again.

Wendy Christine Allen, Old Orchard Beach's Autistic Author, Artist, Illustrator, & Art Car Designer

Counting Down to the September 23, 2028 50th Anniversary of my first published book (September 23, 1978)

If you are here looking for The Twighlight Manor series, The Crystonite Wars series, The Wild Years series, The White Rock Asylum for the Criminally Insane series, The Twisted Tales series, the Captured By a MerMan series, The Space Dock 13 series, The Kats of Planet Ptarmagin series, the stories about Miss Citten the Eel-Kat, or the stories about Etiole... ALL of those series were combined and consolidated into The Adventures of Quaraun the Insane Pink Necromancer series in 2014, so ALL the different series, are now under one series title.

List of the published titles still in print:

The Index of over three thousand stories in The Pink Necromancer series

What the series is about, for those new here:

The introduction to The Pink Necromancer Series. 

If you want some stories to get you started in The Pink Necromancer series, reading these first will give you a good introduction to the 3 main characters:

My Elves Are JellyFish...and I asked Google AI and ChatGPT 5.6 what they thought of this.

As requested, my daily writing prompt series is now available print paperback editions on Amazon.

There are 20 volumes of this writing prompt series currently planned and in varying stages of finishing, hopefully all 20 will be published by the end of 2026. I likely will do a 2nd series of writing prompt books in 2027.

The first of the Visual Novels/Video Games for The Adventures of Quaraun the Inane/The Pink Necromancer series is published and available on Itch.io, there are 3 more planned for release in 2026, 6 more planned for release in 2027, and the big 60-hour 80k word 150 page one (Quaraun Goes To the Fair) is planned for a 2028 release.

There is a Pink Necromancer card game and a Pink Necromancer board game, as well as a Pink Necromancer table top RPG supliment for Dungeons and Dragons, all in the works, and to be released over the next couple of years as well.

Health update: August 4, 2026 - in recovery for 6 months+ (at least until mid-January 2027...all book and video game releases are pushed back at least 6 months) see video below for why...
@eelkat

health update #maine #disabilityawareness #wheelchairlife #wheelchairvlogger #multiplesclerosis

♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author
@eelkat Health update: #chickenpox #bellspalsy #RamsayHuntsyndrome #paralysis #recovery ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author
@eelkat

I seem to have had another stroke (during the night while I was asleep?) #stroke #paralysis

♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

Update Sept 3, 2026:

I am able to get around enough to take Koko to dog park... today is 29 days since getting out of hospital. My diet is still mostly liquid, but im eating some solid food again, but its like rice or soft mushy baby food type stuff because I still can not chew yet, though I can swallow again. My jaw is still not functioning good so im having trouble talking still. So there's been slight improvement to my mouth, throat, and jaw, but, zero improvement to my eye, which is a major concern, be Im almost fully blind right now. im legally blind since birth in my left eye, so I have no ability to fall back on using my left eye. My right eye is the one injured and my vision in it is "40% decreased" according to my doctor, but it wasn't good vision to begin with, and right now my right eye is not much different from my legally blind left eye. Which I why I have to have someone drive my car for me instead of me driving my car myself right now, which is very frustrating, because, being a female, I had to fight for over twenty years to be allowed to drive. I started sneaking out at age 31 and dressing as a man to go to Old Orchard Beach high school to get a ged, because us females are not allowed to go to school. And i was 37 years old when snuck out to the DMV and got a driver's permit and started going to college. I was 42 and 8 months pregnant when my family found out I was going to college and thats when I was punished by the backhoe driving over my house and my spine broken with a golf club and my baby born right then and killed with same golf club. So it's very frustrating now, so soon after finally being able to drive , to now not be able to drive because of an eye injury, especially after 14 years of being paralyzed from the golf club and not being allowed to have a wheelchair, again, because i am female and we females are simply not allowed to do anything. I hate the culture I was born into. I wish I had the freedom to go to school and drive a car the way American women do. I wish having my spine broken with a golf club and my baby killed with a golf club and a backhoe driven over my house was not how men in my family punishment women in my family for learning to read and write. Its so frustrating not being able to to drive again, so soon after 14 years being paralyzed, and being paralyzed by the golf club was the punishment for getting a driver's license back in 2013 after 30 years of men not letting me have one. I hate my family's culture and how they treat us women.

I get so sick of Americans telling me how they wish they could be a Gypsy… they are either misogynist woman hating pigs, or delusional idiots who haven't got a clue how shittily we Gypsy women are treated by Gypsy men, because no one in their righ mind who knows anything about Gypsy culture would ever want to be part of it. I hate that I was born a Gypsy. 

update sept 7, 2026

"You would not make a good teacher"... what does that mean, and why are there so many people on Railroad Ave and Western Ave and Cutts St why walk up to me and say that to me?

I find it very confusing. I have low functioning Autism (the Rain Man type) and so i have very little understanding of words beyond the basic ones, and i never went to to school, so I never learned maths or sciences, and I only had remedial classes at Southern Maine Community College, because I did not have an education to enroll with regular, I was there taking every reading and writing class they had to learn how to read and write, and also took speaking classes to learn how to talk (i spoke Shetland Scottish language because that was language my grandmother spoke but she died when I was 8 so I only knew that language to speak and write, and I was 37 when I went to college and 42 when I learned English speaking and I still cant speak English good yet), all the other classes I took were art painting and cooking.

So the phrase "You would not make a good teacher" makes no sense to me because it seems to imply that I am trying to be a teacher, but I don't have anything close to the education ti be a teacher, and im not trying to be a teacher. So I don't know why people keep saying this phrase to me and I assume it must have some sort of a slang meaning, but I can't figure out what it could be of why do these people keep saying it to me.

see video below for more information: 


@eelkat "You would not make a good teacher"... what does that mean, and why are there so many people on Railroad Ave and Western Ave and Cutts St why walk up to me and say that to me? I find it very confusing. I have low functioning Autism (the Rain Man type) and so i have very little understanding of words beyond the basic ones, and i never went to to school, so I never learned maths or sciences, and I only had remedial classes at Southern Maine Community College, because I did not have an education to enroll with regular, I was there taking every reading and writing class they had to learn how to read and write, and also took speaking classes to learn how to talk (i spoke Shetland Scottish language because that was language my grandmother spoke but she died when I was 8 so I only knew that language to speak and write, and I was 37 when I went to college and 42 when I learned English speaking and I still cant speak English good yet), all the other classes I took were art painting and cooking. So the phrase "You would not make a good teacher" makes no sense to me because it seems to imply that I am trying to be a teacher, but I don't have anything close to the education ti be a teacher, and im not trying to be a teacher. So I don't know why people keep saying this phrase to me and I assume it must have some sort of a slang meaning, but I can't figure out what it could be of why do these people keep saying it to me. #mainelife #biddefordmaine #maine #disabilitytiktok #Biddeford ♬ original sound Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

update Sept 15, 2026:

I have some slight movement in some my fingers again again after over a decade being paralyzed

you remember how I used to be a professional doll making, pattern designer, and embroiderer, back before I became paralized and before my son was murdered and being the backhoe drove over my house?

all my equipment, sewing machines, ect were all destroyed by the backhoe driving over my house, and I have been quardepelegic for over a decade because of it so could not use my hands to sew or draw or embroider, and so only continued to do my writing of novels since then because I could do that with dragon dictation software,

well, since 2016, I been playing Witcher 3 and don't starve video games on twitch livestream, one hand two fingers, as part of my therapy to regain nerve and muscle use of my fingers, and now after 10 years of that, I have somewhat more movement in my fingers and im thinking maybe I can try to do embroidery and doll making again, but not sure, anyways, now im rebuying all of my sewing and embroidery equipment that the backhoe destroyed when it drove over my house, and hopefully I can use my hand enough to embroider again.

waiting for stuff to arrive in mail, so soon I should find out if ten years of twitch gaming has given me enough muscle strength to use my fingers to embroider again.

update to the previous video, answering viewer question about lack of hospital vs broken spine

Wheelchair Fundraiser... I need to upgrade to a power wheelchair, the manual one just isn't enough anymore. But the power wheelchair is $25k. Yes, twenty five thousand dollars. Wtf? I can get a car for a quarter that price, why are wheelchairs so damned expensive? That's more money then I make in five years, so I need to start a fundraiser for it.

How to Write a Character Falling Asleep (First Person)? from writing

>I'm trying to imply that my narrator is falling asleep through what they say (and how they say it) in the final paragraph. Just to give you an idea of what I mean, here's what I've got in my first draft.

>I had a bit of a hard time trying to write this and, in my opinion at least, it really doesn't work. Anyone got some tips for writing this kind of passage? Just to be clear, I'm not looking for a specific critique of the paragraph itself (although feel free if it helps you illustrate your point), but for a more general guide on how to do this right.

Yes. I agree. What you have written there falls flat. Not only in words but also in presentation.

It is unnatural to read long blocks of text as dialogue.

Dialogue is short and snappy and when down properly, that little paragraph of yours should instead be many paragraphs, spanning 2 or more pages of the novel.

If a person is talking while falling asleep, their last few lines often become disjointed and they start muttering things that are inconsistent. Plus, a tired person is not going to drone on in one long monologue the way you've written it. Also, in first person, you can easily add her unspoken thoughts in between. You can also show the other party getting upset over her drifting off. Like this...

Instead of this...

"We’ll just take it one day at a time until we get to New York, and just hope that what they say is true. If not… Then something else. We’ll think of something. Just one day at a time just now. Tomorrow we’ll go swimming and that will be fun. Elsie loves swimming. We used to swim in California. Elsie used to squeal like a little girl in the water. Such a wuss…"

Write this:

"I'm worried we are doing too much, too fast."

Does she really have to bring this up now?

~YAWN~

I am so tired. Maybe if I pretend I didn't hear her...

"Hey, are you listening to me?"

"Yeah. I hear you."

"Well?"

"We’ll just take it one day at a time until we get to New York, and just hope that what they say is true. If not…"

"And?"

"What?" I jumped and looked around, wondering where I was. Her harsh reply jerked me awake. How long had I been asleep?

"Are you even listening to me?"

"Yeah. What do you want?"

"You said 'If not'..."

"If not?" I tried to recall what it was I had been saying, but sleep was clouding my mind. "If not... oh! I know. Then something else."

"Something else? What do you mean, something else?"

"We’ll think of something."

"Do you even know what you're saying?"

No. I wasn't sure what I was saying. So tired. Way past my bed time. Why won't she just leave me alone and let me sleep already. Jese, you'd think she could take a hint.

"Just one day at a time just now," I muttered feeling as if I was in a dream.

"Don't you dare give me that one more day crap, you know it's bull crap."

"Tomorrow we’ll go swimming..."

"What? Are you even listening to me?"

"That'll be fun. Hmmmm. Swimming. I like swimming."

"What are you on about?"

"Elsie loves swimming too."

"Who's talking about Elsie. I was talking about us. Wake up you stupid dolt. You don't even know what you're saying."

"We used to swim... swim... in Califooooornia. He he."

"You're dreaming, you stupid 'git. You never lived in California."

"California..."

"Wake up!"

"Elsie used to squeal like a little girl in the water. Such a wuss…"

Can you see the change in flow, from one bunched up pile of text in a single paragraph, to a long fluid flow of dialogue spanning multiple pages?

Also...

THIS:

It was a stressful night and she was lying awake worrying. Focusing on Elsie calms her down and allows her to fall asleep, and I'm keeping it flowing like this to show that she doesn't even really realise she's calmed down. It shows how worry for Elsie hurts her (keeping her awake), but that her love for Elsie is what calms her down. Basically the nature and strength of the relationship.

Is 3rd person narrative, not 1st person.

First person is this:

It was a such stressful night and here I am just lying awake worrying. Focusing on Elsie usually calms me down and allows me to fall asleep. Damn, why doesn't it work tonight? My worry for that bitch Elsie hurts me keeping me awake, but my love for Elsie calms me down. Elsie. I can't lover her. I can't hate her. Damn it all! Basically the nature and strength of the relationship. Yeah, that's what Elsie is.

On that note, let's rewrite the dialogue into 3rd person, so you can see the difference.

"I'm worried we are doing too much, too fast," Sally said.

Does she really have to bring this up now? Betsy thought, yawing. I am so tired. Maybe if I pretend I didn't hear her...

"Hey, are you listening to me?"

"Yeah. I hear you."

"Well?"

"We’ll just take it one day at a time until we get to New York, and just hope that what they say is true. If not…"

"And?" She was getting upset over Betsy's not staying alert during such an important conversation.

"What?" Betsy jumped and looked around, wondering where she was. Sally's harsh reply jerked Betsy awake. How long have I been asleep?

"Are you even listening to me?"

Sally stamped her foot and crossed her arms, but Betsy didn't notice.

"Yeah," Betsy answered sleepily. "What do you want?"

Sally rolled her eyes hoping Betsy would take a hint, but Betsy had her eyes closed and didn't see Sally's over exaggerated fake frustration.

"You said 'If not'..." Sally whined.

"If not?" Betsy tried to recall what it was she had been saying, but sleep was clouding her mind. "If not... oh! I know. Then something else."

"Something else? What do you mean, something else?"

"We’ll think of something."

"Do you even know what you're saying?"

No. Betsy thought. I wasn't sure what I was saying. So tired. Way past my bed time. Why won't she just leave me alone and let me sleep already. Jese, you'd think she could take a hint.

"Just one day at a time just now," Betsy muttered feeling as if she was in a dream.

"Don't you dare give me that one more day crap, you know it's bull crap."

"Tomorrow we’ll go swimming..."

"What? Are you even listening to me?"

Sally was getting more and more pissed off at Betsy, but Betsy was too tired to notice.

"That'll be fun. Hmmmm. Swimming. I like swimming."

"What are you on about?" It was becoming all Sally could do to not punch Betsy right now.

"Elsie loves swimming too."

"Who's talking about Elsie. I was talking about us. Wake up you stupid dolt. You don't even know what you're saying."

"We used to swim... swim... in Califooooornia. He he."

"You're dreaming, you stupid 'git. You never lived in California."

"California..."

"Wake up!"

"Elsie used to squeal like a little girl in the water. Such a wuss…"

As you can see there is very little difference. Is and MEs become proper names, hes, and shes, and you get to add extra lines to further describe what the characters are doing.

UPDATE: September 30, 2023

Soooo.... this page has not been updated in many, many years, nor have I shared a link to it anywhere, however, for some reason today it got 115 (one hundred and fifteen) views. Uhm... okay. That's actually a good thing, and usually that only happens to a "dead" page when someone shares it on social media, so, thank you to whomever shared it.

But anyways, while I was noticing it was getting traffic again, I decided why not let's ask ChatGPT to write it's own version of an answer, like I've been doing on my new/current pages, so, let's do that!

The Prompt:

How to describe falling asleep in creative writing?

ChatGPT's answer:

Describing the act of falling asleep in creative writing can be a beautiful and evocative experience, as it allows you to convey the transition from wakefulness to slumber in a way that engages the reader's senses and emotions. Here's a step-by-step guide on how to do it effectively:

1. Set the Scene:
Begin by setting the scene and creating a sense of place. Describe the surroundings, whether it's a cozy bedroom, a moonlit forest, or a starry night on a magical ferris wheel. Use sensory details to immerse your readers in the environment.

2. Emphasize Comfort:
Highlight the comfort and coziness of the sleeping space. Mention soft blankets, plush pillows, or the gentle rustling of leaves in the breeze. Convey a feeling of safety and relaxation.

3. Sensory Details:
Engage the senses. Describe the scent of lavender from a nearby sachet, the feel of cool sheets against the skin, the muffled sounds of a distant lullaby, or the taste of warm, soothing tea before bedtime.

4. Internal Thoughts and Emotions:
Offer insight into the character's thoughts and emotions as they prepare to sleep. Are they feeling content, anxious, or reflective? Share their internal monologue or contemplations about the day.

5. Physical Sensations:
Explore the physical sensations of drowsiness. Mention the heaviness of eyelids, the gentle slowing of breath, or the way muscles relax. Connect these sensations to the character's emotional state.

6. Dreamlike Imagery:
Transition into dreamlike imagery as the character drifts off. Use metaphors and similes to describe the feeling of falling into slumber. For example, "She felt like a leaf floating on a tranquil stream," or "His thoughts scattered like stardust in the night."

7. Symbolism:
Consider incorporating symbolism or foreshadowing into the description of falling asleep. This can hint at future events or themes in your story.

8. Transition:
Signal the transition from wakefulness to sleep with a key moment or phrase. This could be the closing of the character's eyes, the last coherent thought before drifting away, or the arrival of a recurring dream.

9. Final Emotion:
Conclude with the emotional state of the character as they fall asleep. Are they finding peace, escaping from their worries, or embracing a sense of wonder? This final emotional note can leave a lasting impression on the reader.

10. Leave Room for Interpretation:
Remember that the act of falling asleep can be deeply personal and subjective. Leave room for readers to connect with the experience on their own terms, allowing them to recall their own moments of drifting into slumber.

Here's an example of describing falling asleep:

She lay in her hammock, swaying gently under the canopy of stars. The night air was cool against her skin, carrying the scent of blooming jasmine. As her eyelids grew heavy, she watched as the stars blinked like distant fireflies, their light fading into the velvety sky. She felt like a paper boat drifting on a tranquil river, carried away by the gentle current of sleep. Her last coherent thought was a whispered wish for sweet dreams, and then the world dissolved into the soft embrace of night.

Remember that the style of your description can vary based on the tone and genre of your story. Whether you're aiming for a poetic, introspective, or whimsical depiction, make sure it aligns with the overall mood and themes of your narrative.

The Prompt:

How to describe falling asleep in creative writing? I'm trying to imply that my narrator is falling asleep through what they say (and how they say it) in the final paragraph. Just to give you an idea of what I mean, here's what I've got in my first draft.

"It was a stressful night and she was lying awake worrying. Focusing on Elsie calms her down and allows her to fall asleep, and I'm keeping it flowing like this to show that she doesn't even really realise she's calmed down. It shows how worry for Elsie hurts her (keeping her awake), but that her love for Elsie is what calms her down. Basically the nature and strength of the relationship."

I had a bit of a hard time trying to write this and, in my opinion at least, it really doesn't work. Anyone got some tips for writing this kind of passage? Just to be clear, I'm not looking for a specific critique of the paragraph itself (although feel free if it helps you illustrate your point), but for a more general guide on how to do this right.

Please recommend edits and changes I can make to improve this.

ChatGPT's answer:

Describing the act of falling asleep through a character's thoughts and emotions can be a powerful way to convey their mental and emotional state. Here are some tips and edits you can consider to improve your passage:

Original Passage:
"It was a stressful night, and she was lying awake worrying. Focusing on Elsie calms her down and allows her to fall asleep, and I'm keeping it flowing like this to show that she doesn't even really realize she's calmed down. It shows how worry for Elsie hurts her (keeping her awake), but that her love for Elsie is what calms her down. Basically, the nature and strength of the relationship."

Revised Passage:
"On this particularly stressful night, she lay there, her thoughts swirling in the darkness like restless ghosts. Worries danced on the edges of her mind, refusing to let her find solace in slumber. It was Elsie, her anchor amidst the tumultuous sea of anxieties, who ultimately whispered peace into her troubled heart. She didn't even notice the transition, how the storm of her thoughts gradually subsided into a gentle breeze. It was as though Elsie's name alone had the power to lull her into serenity. The weight of her love for Elsie became a soothing balm, mending the frayed edges of her restless soul. She drifted into dreams, cocooned in the warm embrace of their relationship, where worries held no dominion."

Tips for Improving the Description:

1. Use Vivid Imagery: Paint a picture with words by describing the thoughts as "swirling in the darkness" and worries "dancing on the edges of her mind." This creates a visual and emotional impact.

2. Show, Don't Tell: Instead of directly stating that focusing on Elsie calms her down, show this transformation through the calming imagery and emotions that follow.

3. Embrace Metaphors: Metaphors can be a powerful tool to convey complex emotions. In this case, you can use the metaphor of a storm gradually subsiding into a gentle breeze to represent the calming effect of Elsie's presence.

4. Highlight Contrast: Emphasize the contrast between the initial restlessness and the eventual serenity. This highlights the impact of Elsie's presence on the character's mental state.

5. Bring in the Senses: Incorporate sensory details to immerse the reader in the experience. Mention the "warm embrace" and "soothing balm" to evoke a tactile and emotional response.

6. Symbolism: You can use the act of falling asleep as a symbolic representation of finding peace and comfort within their relationship. This adds depth to the narrative.

Remember, the key is to engage the reader's senses and emotions, allowing them to connect with the character's experience of falling asleep on a deeper level.

The Prompt:

How to describe falling asleep in creative writing? I'm trying to imply that my narrator is falling asleep through what they say (and how they say it) in the final paragraph.

How can I best use Vivid Imagery to do this? Can you please explain this technique in more detail? Paint a picture with words by describing the thoughts as "swirling in the darkness" and worries "dancing on the edges of her mind." This creates a visual and emotional impact. Could you write a short scene to use as an example of How to use vivid imagery to describe falling asleep in creative writing?

ChatGPT's answer:

Certainly! Using vivid imagery to describe falling asleep in creative writing can immerse readers in the character's experience. Here's a short scene as an example:

---

The room was cloaked in the quiet of midnight, a tranquil canvas for the mind to paint its dreams. She lay there, her eyelids heavy with the weight of the day, each blink a slow descent into the realm of slumber. Thoughts, like fireflies in the twilight, flickered and waned, their once-keen edges softening into indistinct shadows.

Outside, the wind whispered secrets through the open window, and the curtains rustled like memories brushing against the glass. It was as if the night itself had reached out to cradle her in its tender embrace. The world beyond her senses grew distant, replaced by the ethereal landscape of her dreams.

Beneath the quilt, her body sank into the mattress, its warmth cocooning her as she journeyed deeper into the enigmatic labyrinth of sleep. Her breaths slowed, becoming gentle breezes that stirred the tranquil waters of her mind. It was as though the room had become a sanctuary, a sacred space where time flowed like a meandering river, winding its way into the realm of dreams.

The distant echo of a lullaby whispered in her thoughts, a melody of serenity that guided her into the embrace of Morpheus. The worries that had once held her captive now dissipated like mist in the morning sun, vanishing into the tapestry of her subconscious.

And there, in the hushed stillness of the night, she surrendered to the tender clasp of sleep, her consciousness becoming a ship adrift on the tranquil sea of dreams, carried away by the gentle currents of the night.

---

In this example, vivid imagery is used to convey the sensory and emotional experience of falling asleep. It creates a visual and emotional impact by describing the surroundings, sensations, and mental state of the character as they transition from wakefulness to slumber.

The Prompt:

How to describe falling asleep in creative writing? I'm trying to imply that my narrator is falling asleep through what they say (and how they say it) in the final paragraph.

How can I best use Show, Don't Tell to do this? Can you please explain this technique in more detail? Instead of directly stating that focusing on Elsie calms her down, show this transformation through the calming imagery and emotions that follow. Could you write a short scene to use as an example of How to use Show, Don't Tell to describe falling asleep in creative writing?

ChatGPT's answer:

Certainly! Using "Show, Don't Tell" is a powerful technique to describe falling asleep by allowing readers to infer the character's state through actions, emotions, and sensory details. Here's a short scene as an example:

---

The night stretched endlessly before her, a dark tapestry woven with threads of worry. As she lay there, restlessness gnawing at her thoughts, she reached out for Elsie. The soft warmth of her beloved's hand, intertwined with her own, sent ripples of comfort through her soul. In that simple touch, she found solace, a lifeline to tranquility.

Outside, the rain tapped gently on the windowpane, a soothing lullaby that spoke of nature's rhythms. With each drop, the weight of her concerns began to lift, carried away on the whispered cadence of the storm. Shadows played on the walls, their dance a gentle distraction from the troubles that had plagued her just moments before.

Elsie's breathing, steady and serene, mirrored the quietude of the room. It was a melody that invited her to join in, to let go of the world's troubles, if only for a while. The scent of lavender from their shared pillow wafted through the air, a fragrant promise of serenity.

She closed her eyes, embracing the sensation of sinking into the mattress, the softness cradling her like a mother's embrace. The room, once a battleground of thoughts, now transformed into a sanctuary of dreams. Her mind, still and peaceful, began to wander through the landscapes of slumber.

Images drifted by, as ethereal as clouds in the night sky, each one a fragment of a dream yet to be. The tension in her body eased, replaced by the gentle pull of drowsiness. It was a sensation as soft as a feather's touch, guiding her towards the realm of sleep.

And as the night held its breath, she let herself be carried away by the current of tranquility, her worries fading like distant echoes in the night.

---

In this example, "Show, Don't Tell" is used to depict the character's journey from restlessness to calmness, allowing readers to infer her state of falling asleep through sensory details, emotions, and actions. This technique engages the reader's imagination and creates a more immersive experience.

The Prompt:

How to describe falling asleep in creative writing? I'm trying to imply that my narrator is falling asleep through what they say (and how they say it) in the final paragraph.

How can I best Embrace Metaphors to do this? Metaphors can be a powerful tool to convey complex emotions. In this case, you can use the metaphor of a storm gradually subsiding into a gentle breeze to represent the calming effect of Elsie's presence. Could you write a short scene to use as an example of How to use Embrace Metaphors to describe falling asleep in creative writing?

ChatGPT's answer:

Certainly! Metaphors can add depth and vividness to your descriptions. Here's a short scene using the metaphor of a storm to describe falling asleep:

---

The night had been a tempest, her thoughts a relentless downpour that pelted the windows of her mind. Restless, she tossed and turned, seeking refuge from the deluge of worries. But then, as if in response to her silent plea, Elsie's hand found hers.

It was a lifeline thrown into the midst of the storm. Elsie's presence was a lightning rod, drawing away the charged anxiety that crackled in the air. Their fingers intertwined, creating a circuit that sent soothing currents through her body.

Outside, the storm still raged, but in their cocoon of warmth and affection, it began to relent. The thunderous thoughts that had echoed in her mind now retreated, becoming distant rumbles. Lightning flashes of concern faded into a gentle, persistent drizzle of reassurance.

Elsie's breath, once an erratic gale, steadied into a calm breeze. It rustled the leaves of her consciousness, brushing away the debris of unease. The room, once a battleground of racing thoughts, transformed into a peaceful meadow, dew-kissed and serene.

She closed her eyes, feeling the storm within her subside. The torrent of worries turned into a gentle, meandering stream of consciousness. It wound its way through the landscape of her mind, carrying away the remnants of tension and doubt.

And so, in the quietude of that night, the storm gave way to a tranquil dawn. She let herself drift, carried by the gentle zephyrs of Elsie's love, toward the shores of sleep.

---

In this scene, the metaphor of a storm gradually subsiding into a gentle breeze is used to convey the narrator's journey from restlessness to falling asleep, with Elsie's presence serving as the calming force. Metaphors like this can evoke powerful emotions and imagery in your writing.

The Prompt:

How to describe falling asleep in creative writing? I'm trying to imply that my narrator is falling asleep through what they say (and how they say it) in the final paragraph.

How can I best Highlight Contrasts to do this? Emphasize the contrast between the initial restlessness and the eventual serenity. This highlights the impact of Elsie's presence on the character's mental state.. Could you write a short scene to use as an example of How to use Highlighting Contrasts to describe falling asleep in creative writing?

ChatGPT's answer:

Certainly! Highlighting contrasts can create a strong sense of transformation. Here's a short scene using this technique to describe falling asleep:

---

The night had been a restless tempest, a symphony of worries that played on the strings of her consciousness. Tossing and turning in the bed, she had been trapped in a whirlwind of anxious thoughts.

But then, there was a shift, subtle yet profound. It was as if a soft hand had reached into the turbulence of her mind, stilling the chaotic currents. Elsie's presence, like a lighthouse cutting through the fog, began to work its magic.

The initial disarray of her thoughts, like scattered puzzle pieces, slowly began to assemble. Worries that had danced on the edges of her mind now found their seats, and the cacophony of doubts transformed into a gentle hum of reassurance.

Outside, the world seemed to follow suit. The howling winds that had echoed her restlessness now sighed with resignation, as if acknowledging defeat. The harsh drumming of rain on the windowpane morphed into a soothing lullaby, each drop a note in the melody of her dreams.

The contrast was striking. From a nightmarish maelstrom, she had been guided into the tranquil waters of slumber. Her racing thoughts had been tamed into a serene river, carrying her toward the shores of rest.

With a contented sigh, she closed her eyes, embracing the quietude that enveloped her. The contrast between chaos and calm was a testament to Elsie's profound influence. In the stillness, she surrendered to the embrace of sleep.

---

In this scene, the contrast between the initial restlessness and the eventual serenity is emphasized, highlighting the impact of Elsie's presence on the character's mental state as she falls asleep. This technique can effectively convey the character's journey from turmoil to tranquility.

The Prompt:

How to describe falling asleep in creative writing? I'm trying to imply that my narrator is falling asleep through what they say (and how they say it) in the final paragraph.

How can I best Bring in the Senses to do this? Incorporate sensory details to immerse the reader in the experience. Mention the "warm embrace" and "soothing balm" to evoke a tactile and emotional response. Could you write a short scene to use as an example of How to use Bringing in the Senses to describe falling asleep in creative writing?

ChatGPT's answer:

Certainly! Incorporating the senses can create a vivid and immersive description of falling asleep. Here's a short scene using this technique:

---

The night had been a relentless cascade of thoughts, each drop heavier than the last, beating against the windows of her mind. Anxiety had clenched its grip, refusing to let go.

But then, there was a shift—a subtle, imperceptible change that stirred the senses. It was as if a warm embrace enveloped her, a gentle cocoon of serenity. Elsie's presence had always held this power.

The room, once filled with the harsh, buzzing neon of her worries, now bathed in a soft, moonlit glow. The curtains swayed like a lullaby, their fabric brushing against her skin, whispering secrets of tranquility.

The scent of lavender, Elsie's favorite, wafted from the bedside table. It was a soothing balm, calming the tempest of her thoughts. Each breath inhaled carried the promise of a peaceful night's sleep.

The rain outside had transformed. What was once a cacophony of chaos now became a gentle patter on the roof, a rhythmic serenade that lulled her into a tranquil dreamland.

As she closed her eyes, the taste of contentment lingered on her lips, like the sweet aftertaste of a cherished memory. The world outside faded into the background, and she surrendered to the sensory symphony that Elsie's presence had orchestrated.

In the embrace of these sensations, she drifted away, carried on the soothing currents of slumber.

---

In this scene, sensory details such as touch, sight, scent, sound, and taste are used to immerse the reader in the experience of falling asleep. These details evoke a tactile and emotional response, allowing the reader to feel the character's transition from restlessness to serenity as they drift into sleep.

The Prompt:

How to describe falling asleep in creative writing? I'm trying to imply that my narrator is falling asleep through what they say (and how they say it) in the final paragraph.

How can I best use Symbolism to do this? You can use the act of falling asleep as a symbolic representation of finding peace and comfort within their relationship. This adds depth to the narrative.. Could you write a short scene to use as an example of How to use Symbolism to describe falling asleep in creative writing?

ChatGPT's answer:

Certainly! Symbolism can add layers of meaning to your narrative. Here's a short scene using this technique:

---

The night was a tempest, a whirlwind of worries and fears that had raged within her. Each thought was a gust of wind, threatening to uproot the fragile framework of her composure.

But then, as if summoned by the magic of the moment, the room transformed. The soft glow of the bedside lamp became a beacon of hope, casting a warm, golden halo on the walls. Shadows danced in a slow, hypnotic waltz, as if orchestrating a lullaby.

Elsie's presence beside her was the anchor in this storm. Her fingers, entwined with hers, felt like the sturdy roots of an ancient tree, grounding her in the midst of chaos.

As the minutes passed, the turmoil within her began to ebb, like a receding tide. The waves of anxiety grew gentler, their crashing crescendos reduced to soothing whispers.

She closed her eyes, surrendering to the symbolism of the moment. The act of falling asleep became a metaphor for something deeper—a journey into the tranquil sea of their love. With each breath, she descended further into its depths.

In the quietude of that room, she found solace, a sanctuary within their shared dreamscape. It was a symbol of the peace and comfort their relationship offered, a haven from the storms of life.

As her breathing slowed, and her heart found its steady rhythm, she knew that within the realm of their love, she could always find the serenity she sought.

---

In this scene, the act of falling asleep is used as a symbol for finding peace and comfort within the narrator's relationship with Elsie. The symbolism adds depth to the narrative, conveying a deeper emotional connection between the characters as they find solace in each other's presence.

So, what do you think? Was ChatGPT's advice helpful?

IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER:

This page contains sections written by an LLM AI, specifically OpenAI's ChatGPT 3.5

The sections written by AI are noted and separated with a orange/pink stripe boarder around them.

Sections written by AI has not been fact checked and may contain inaccuracies. They are included for entertainment purposes only. The goal here is to show you what AIs like ChatGPT are capable of doing and as such the AI sections are directly copy/pasted into this page without any edits, changes, or fact checking done, so that you can see what AI output looks like.

The goal of this page is to show you how to write long, detailed command prompts that will get ChatGPT to output less generic and more useful content for you. Please remember, when using AI for your own content that AI is a random generator that guesses what word should logically come next and is NOT actually giving you correct answers to your questions as it has no ability to comprehend word meanings; and as such LLM AIs have a very high rate of fact inaccuracies, often outputting incorrect and inaccurate information at a rate as high as 64% to 73% in 8 times out of every 10 answers, which has been proven by numerous studies.

As of July 2023, there are currently more then 300 LLM AI apps and programs available with varying degrees of outputting informational accuray. As of July 2023, MOST of those has an accuracy rate of only 2% to 3%.

I choose to use ChatGPT for this article, because it has the highest rate of NOT giving inaccurate information, of any AI language model currently available, however it's inaccuracy rate is still higher then 50% inaccurate output more then 50% of the time, HOWEVER, as the June 2023 Stanford and Berkeley studies have shown, ChatGPT is only fully accurate 2.4% of the time, and this 2.4% is the MOST accurate AI rate out there as of July 2023.

The fact that ChatGPT is only 100% accurate 2.4% of the time and it is the MOST accurate of ANY of the AIs currently available, shows how very alarmingly INACCURATE any output from AI is and why you SHOULD NOT be using it for research or anything requiring factual information. Please keep this in mind when using AI programs in your own writing.

If you choose to use LLM AI's such as ChatGPT for your content, please remember that t is NOT a research program, it is NOT a search engine, and 88 times out of 10 it is going to give you as much as 75% inaccurate information. DO NOT use LLM AIs to create your content, unless you plan on doing huge amounts of fact checking and actual research to ensure that the content you publish is accurate.




While there are around 20k pages on this website, most of them are blocked from search engines, with only around 800 of them available for appearing in Google/Bing/etc search results. The remainder can only be accessed via the various links found throughout this site. This was done deliberately on my part, and I did it because the bulk of the pages on this website are chapters from 138 novels and 423 novellas, so only the first page of each novel and novella indexed by search engines, and the remainder are linked in order, one page at a time, via clicking "next page" at the end of each. So if you are looking for a specific page from a specific novel, Google can't help you.



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Wendy Christine Allen 🌸💖🦄 aka EelKat 🧿💛🔮👻
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Wheelchair Fundraiser

@eelkat

i just found out there is yet another bizarre rumour going around. where are these wild rumours coming from? who is starting them? and why?

♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author
@eelkat

since I've been flooded with hundreds of messages the past two weeks asking if I still own "the world's most haunted car", yes, and here it is, filmed today May 18, 2026… but my son Xavier is dead, i am crippled and given that people are AGAIN showing up calling my Dodge "haunted", calling my friend "an alien", calling me "transgender", and spreading wild defamation slander connecting me to Stephen King, I think I need to start taking down the contact information of every blogger, podcaster, youtuber, and social media account spreading these rumors, and sue every single one of them for CAUSING my car to be cut in half May 10, 2010, for CAUSING the backhoe that drove over my house August 8, 2013, for CAUSING my son's murder November 14, 2013, for CAUSING me to be crippled and in a wheelchair November 14, 2013, and for CONTINUING to CAUSE harassers to show up in person to harass me near daily, STILL now in 2026. EVERYONE telling you my car is haunted, telling you my friend is an alien, calling my car "the goldeneagle", calling my friend "Etiole", or trying to connect me or my car to Stephen King, is lying to you. They crippled me when I was 8 months pregnant, and a woman with a golf club, severed my spine and bashed my baby's head in, I spent 9 years relearning to walk, and the FBI is 13 years into the murder investigation and not yet identified the attacker who crippled me and killed my baby, both violently with a golf club and the FBI believes that it is friends and family of the woman who did it, are the ones who started and spread the rumors saying my car is haunted, saying I'm an alien abductee, saying all kinds of similar bs about aliens, ufos, ghosts, witchcraft, demons, and Stephen King connections, even though I don't believe in ghosts, aliens, ufos, demons, and had never heard of Stephen King before 30k of his fans showed up in my yard trying to find my car! FBI believes the backhoe driver and the murderer are the same person and it is a developer who wanted my land and so started the Stephen King, ghost, and alien rumors all in an attempt to drive me off my land, and when it didn't work they drove a backhoe over my house, and when that didn't work they crippled me and killed my son. Why are they doing this? How do I get them to stop?

♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author






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Get an email whenever Wendy Christine Allen 🌸💖🦄 aka EelKat 🧿💛🔮👻 publishes on Medium.

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Do you know who drove this backhoe over my house at 146 Portland Avenue, Old Orchard Beach, Maine on August 8, 2013? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

My house at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, July 4, 2013, photo taken because we had just finished building a baby room on the back. vs My house August 8, 2013, when the same group of people (yes group, the golf club woman was not alone when she attacked November 14, 2013, nor was she alone with her second attack July 2016.) who murdered my son on November 14, 2013 at Southern Maine Community College and crippled me July 26, 2016 at scarborough WalMart,... they arrived the first time with a backhoe on August 8, 2013, that they used to drive over my house, during a time of day that I normally was home asleep... I had to work a different shift at the Waffle Cone Pizza Food Truck at George's Parking Lot by Bill's Pizza at the OBB Peir, that day, otherwise, I too would be at the bottom of a landfill, along with my house and everything I owned that was also in the house. I was 5 months pregnant at the time and have been homeless for just under 14 years, homeless ever since....

... which means it is now only a few weeks from the 14th anniversary of my son's murder. I was 8 month pregnant November 14, 2013, and a student ay SMCC, and coming out of the Buglight Lighthouse art studio after art class, when a still unidentifiedwoman wielding a golf club attacked me, severed my spine, while I was 8 months pregnant, triggered early labour, then killed my son minutes after he was born.

While accusing me of being transgender, screaming "transvestite freak" and "look at that thing, that's Ken's son in a dress"... while I was 8 months pregnant.

eelkats_house_before_after.jpgMy house at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, July 4, 2013, photo taken because we had just finished building a baby room on the back. vs My house August 8, 2013, when the same group of people (yes group, the golf club woman was not alone when she attacked November 14, 2013, nor was she alone with her second attack July 2016.) who murdered my son and crippled me, arrived the first time with a backhoe that they used to drive over my house, during a time of day that I normally was home asleep... I had to work a different shift at the Waffle Cone Pizza Food Truck at George's Parking Lot by Bill's Pizza at the OBB Peir, that day, otherwise, I too would be at the bottom of a landfill, along with my house and everything I owned that was also in the house. I was 5 months pregnant at the time and have been homeless for just under 14 years, homeless ever since.

The backhoe driver returned November 14, 2013, armed with a golf club, used it to break my spine and smash my baby's brains out on the ground

On November 14, 2013, my son was murdered. I was 8 months pregnant, leaving my college classroom, and just getting into my car, when 3 strangers, a man and two women, armed with golf clubs leapt out from behind my car screaming "kill or be killed, kill the transvestite freaks, kill them all before they kill us! look at that thing! That is Ken's son, look at how it's dressed! kill the transvestite freaks! kill or be killed"... while the bald man and the red haired woman chanted this over and over, the blonde woman, lunged with the golf club.

She severed my spine, I am now a quadriplegic, and been paralyzed arms and legs, and in a wheelchair for 13 years now. She broke my hips, my knees, my legs, ruptured most of my discs, and shattered three of my vertebrae so bad that the shards of bone acted like glass and embedded themselves into my spinal column nerve bundle.

The attack also triggered labour.

My son was born in that parking lot, and he lived only a couple of minutes, before the deranged blonde woman, beat his head in and smashed his brains out, with the same golfclub she had just used to sever my spine and leave me crippled for the rest of my life.

Realizing that I was not transgender, and they'd just murdered a baby, the man grabbed the 2 women and forcibly dragged them away to a 4 door white pickup truck, and they left me there to die.

The FBI told me later, that a few weeks before this attack, and transwoman, had murdered a cis woman, in a parking lot, abou 20 miles away from where I was attacked. The FBI, believes that my attackers, had somehow found out I wrote transgender fiction, connecting my real name to my penname, (my father's name is in fact "Ken", and I do have a brother) and believed that I wrote transgender fiction, because I was myself transgender, even though I'm not transgender. The FBI, believes the attackers, thought I was my brother, pretending to be a woman.

The FBI investigation, into my son's murder, has dragged on for 13 years, and still now in 2026, continues on, with the FBI, still not having yet identified my attackers, and only guessing at what their motive was.

Thus we come to 2014, and the full swing change of the series I write. WHY my series, went from just a transman main character living life, to the full blown Mpreg genre series that it now is today.

Before the attack, I had a chance of having a baby. I don't know. And because I'm in America, I'm too old to adopt. You have to be under 45 years old to adopt a baby. That is the law in America. I was informed this, when we tried to adopt, now that my injuries leave me unable to get pregnant a 9th time.

Thus began my obsessively writing, my transman main character, pregnant. Always pregnant now. Every time. Every story. Stories that now fully focus on pregnancy, labour, miscarriages, babies dying, babies living, raising babies... the whole series, since 2014 has devolved into an outright baby obsession.

Meanwhile, reborn baby dolls were suggested to me by my therapist, and have also become a deeply obsessive part of my life. Because 13 years ago my son was murdered minutes after he was born, because a transphobic bigot mistook me for being transgender, I'm STILL in a wheelchair, struggling to relearn to use my arms and legs, now 13 years later, and I'm still DAILY dealing with police officers and FBI agents who while they are trying to find my son's killer, they are also daily reminding me... oh, yeah, my son was murdered, literally ripped out of my belly, by a transphobe. Who still has not been located and walks free to kill again.

The golfclub woman as she looked during the golf club attack at Southern Maine community college November 14, 2013. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026.

Clairescreenshot.pngIf you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

The golfclub woman as she looked during the shopping cart attack at Scarborough WalMart July 26, 2016. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026.

zzzz999ClaireRed2016-screenshotIf you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

The 2nd woman as she looked at both attacks, her hair goes all the way down to her knees. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026.

Kendrascreenshot.pngIf you have any information about the identity of this child murderer's accomplice, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

Do you know who these two woman who crippled me and murdered my baby, at Southern Maine Community College at 10PM on November 14, 2013, are, and what their connection to the backhoe that drove over my house is? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

I am a legally blind quadriplegic, and low verbal, I have also published 138 novels in the last 48 years. It's not as impossible as people think. The problem being blind and quadriplegic, medically have different meanings then how those two words are used medically.

Fewer than 3% of all blind people see nothing. While 97% people who are classified as fully blind are able to see up to two feet in front of them. Legally blind means I can see more then two feet in front of me but not far enough to see twenty feet in front of me. In my case I can see about eight feet.

Quadriplegic, has varying levels, it means having a damaged nerve bundle in the spinal column causing limited mobility of all 4 limbs, (in my case this was done by a women wielding a golf club, who also beat my 8 month infant's head to pulp on the parking lot tarmak, at the same time she severed my spine with the same golf club; both on November 14, 2013; the FBI investigation into my son's murder and my being crippled has gone on now for 13 years, a few weeks away from 14 years now, and the FBI has still not identified the killer or her motive). Contrary to popular misconception, quadriplegic does NOT mean ZERO movement, it means means limited movement, specifically in means unable to lift arms over head, unable to grip fingers around objects to pick them up, and unable to stand for more then 5 minutes to a time. Because there are so many thousands of nerves in each limb it is actually very rare for there to be 100% no movement, but how much, and to what extent varies by patent depending upon the specific point of injury to the spinal column.

Meaning typing is still possible for over 60% of all quadriplegics.

In my case, it was the lower spine that was severed, cutting off completly my ability to move my right leg, leaving limited feeling in my left leg, and an ability to stand but not walk, with crutches, for the first 9 years. I regained enough nerve growth in my legs by the 9th year to be able to take ten or twelve steps allowing me to get out of bed for the first time since the golf club attack; This in turn lead to me being able to start using a wheelchair, as I was able to sit upright for the first time as well.

Because the shattered vertebrae bone fragments are broken off completly and embedded into the nerve bundle just above my tailbone, doctors were saying I would never walk again, but now at 13 years, I am able to push mu wheelchair like a walker, a distance of almost a thousand steps a day. Though doctors are still doubtful I will ever walk "normally" again, I have proven them wrong, when their said 13 years ago, that I would never walk again at all.

But because of the placement of the damage to my spine, regaining hand use, was always thought possible, it was just a matter of waiting long enough for nerve regrowth, along side daily finger exercises. I was able to continue writing, after becoming quadriplegic, because I still have use of my right thumb, and 2 fore figures of my right hand. And can type 90 words per minute with those 3 fingers.

I however have no wrist strength, elbow strength, or shoulder strength, so I am not able to form a fist, or lift objects, or brush my hair, or my teeth, all thing I have to have my caretaker do. But, those things are not needed for typing. Unfortunately, my pinky and ring fingers are "nerve dead" and drag over the keyboard, and cause horrific spelling errors and typos, which are incredibly frustrating to deal with.

Unfortunately trying to edit errors myself, just makes the errors worse, because those same two fingers drag over the keyboard yet again. Prior to the golf club attack, I rarely had spelling errors; now I got more spelling errors then someone is learning English as second language. Editing is a challenge, that I've had to accept, I simply can not do myself, and I have to hire several editors to help with that.

Low verbal means sounds can still be made, sounds that software programs like Dragon can be trained to recognize and translate, and type into full words. More then half my novels were typed with this method.

I still have a long ways to go before I am anything close to being able to do the things I could do before the golf club woman beat my baby's brains out and shattered my spine. And you know what's more frustrating then how slow mu medical progression has been? The fact that it's been 13 years and the police and FBI are still coming up at dead ends as to who the woman who murdered my baby was, or why she even did it.

My son's 14th birthday is only a few weeks away, but he didn't even get to live long enough to celebrate his 1st birthday, I don't even know why. And I can't wait to regain my ability to walk again, because regaining my ability to walk, means gaining the ability to go outside and start looking for my son's murderer myself instead of sitting at home trapped in a wheelchair waiting for the police and FBI to to find her. So, writing isn't a big priority for me anymore. I only write now, as a way to exercise my hands, in between relearning to walk.

Never let a disability stop you. Plenty of writers, artists, athletes, do not let either blindness, speech impediments, or limited mobility hold then back from perusing their careers.

Do you know who these two woman who crippled me and murdered my baby, at Southern Maine Community College at 10PM on November 14, 2013, are, and what their connection to the backhoe that drove over my house is? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

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All the writing prompts found here on my website, are also available in printed paperback editions, on Amazon.

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