Characters Are What They Do


By EelKat Wendy C Allen
Characters Are What They Do from writing


>Is this a good idea? Bad? Why? What other ways have you planned? I'm honestly slamming my brain against a wall trying to figure out HOW I write, because just writing stalled after 120k words, after I realized I was stuck in acts 1 and kinda 2. I see the logical superiority of planning, but damned if I can figure out which method fits me.

I think the advice you have been given is flawed and was likely given to you by someone who never wrote a novel, never created a character, has no business giving novel writing advice, and is talking out their ass.

In order words, they gave you very bad advice. 

I am increasingly more and more worried about this rather disturbing trend of people with no writing experience, giving increasingly worse and worse advice on the art of writing.

When one seeks to become a millionaire, who do you ask money making advice from? A millionaire stock broker or a know nothing gutter trash rummy at the local pub?

When you require brain surgery, will you also head to the pub and let the town drunk, slice your head open, or will you go to the hospital and have your surgery done by someone trained in their profession?

Why do people who seek to become published authors with a career in writing novels, think the advice of unpublished novelists is going to serve then well?

Do not get novel writing advice, from someone who never wrote a novel. Their novel writing tips don't mean squat because they never put them into practice. Someone who never wrote a novel, has no clue what works and what doesn't work, because they never wrote a novel to test their theories with.

>a character is defined by their actions. That all other forms of expression, be they inner thoughts, emotional responses, even dialogue, are just noise. They are impermanent forms of character development and are essentially meaningless.

If this were true then Ernest Hemingway, Anton Chekhov, Robert Louis Stevenson, Edgar Allan Poe, Charles Dickens, Mark Twain, Laura Ingalls Wilders. Louisa May Alcott, William Shakespeare, H.G.Wells, Robert E. Howard, H.P.Lovecraft, Gaston Leroux, Bram Stoker, Mary Shelley, Percy Shelley, Robert Browning, Carl Barks, Don Rosa, Rumiko Takahashi, and several thousand other authors did not write characters.

Each of these authors are noted for heavily character driven stories.

Each of these authors are know for their lack of action.

Each of these authors is noted for excelling in writing dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, introspective, monologue, inner thoughts, emotional responses, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, introspective, monologue, inner thoughts, emotional responses, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, introspective, monologue, inner thoughts, emotional responses, ....

Each of these authors leave their readers wondering: "So when is the character gonna shut up already?"

Each of these authors leave their readers wondering: "Is this character ever gonna get off his ass and actually DO anything?"

Each of these authors is known for their skill at building the most incredibly, unforgettable, deeply developed characters of all time.

Plot driven stories revolve around action not characters.

Character driven stories revolve around dialogue and emotions and usually exist without any action at all.

Don't believe me? Go read "Hills Like White Elephants". 100% straight up dialogue. Two characters sitting in a bar and arguing. Nothing ever happened.

It's almost Christmas... go read A Christmas Carol. Characters talk about their emotions and feelings. They sit at the desk talki. Sit by the fire talking. Sit on the bed talking. Ghosts going the conversation and start talking with the characters. In the last 2 pages the character gets up and runs back and forth screaming. It's the only action in the entire novel.

Huckleberry Finn... a boy and an escaped slave sit on the river bank and talk. They share hopes and dreams and emotions. A boy and an escaped slave sit on the river boat and talk. They share hopes and dreams and emotions. Sit on a river bank and talk some more. Talk some more on a raft. Talk some more on another river bed. Nothing ever happens.

Alice in Wonderland... Alice talks to her sister. Alice talks to a ccat. Alice talks to a rabbit. Alice talks to a bottle. Alice talks to a doorknob. Alice talks to a rose. Alice talks to a dodo. Alice talks to a mouse. Alice talks to a pig. Alice talks to a fish....Alice talks to a few hundred more characters then she wakes up. No action ever occur.

Treasure Island... boy talks to mom about pirates. Boy talks to sailor about pirates. Boy talks to pirate about pirates. Action: pirate kills sailor. Boy finds map. Boy stows away on pirate hip. End of Action. Boy talks to captain. Boy talks to cook. Boy talks to crew. Boy talks to captain. Boy talks to cook. Boy talks to crew. Boy talks to captain. Boy talks to cook. Boy talks to crew. Boy talks to captain. Boy talks to cook. Boy talks to crew. Boy talks to cook. Boy talks to cook. Boy talks to cook. Boy talks to cook. Land ho! Action happens: boy and pirates leave ship and set up camp. Pirates shoot crew. Everyone gets malaria. End of action. Boy talks to captain. Boy talks to cook. Boy talks to crew. Boy talks to captain. Boy talks to cook. Boy talks to crew. Boy talks to captain. Boy talks to cook. Boy talks to crew. Crazy wild man runs by. Cew arrests pirates. Boy let's cook escape. Boy talks to captain. Boy talks to crew. Boy talks to captain. Boy talks to crew. Boy talks to captain. Boy talks to crew.

Romeo and Juliet: boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, boy talks, girl talks, girl pretends to kill herself, boy kills himself, girl kills herself.

Hamlet: depressed prince talks and talks and talks and talks about his emotions; attends funeral, talks and talks and talks and talks about his dead friends, talks and talks and talks and talks about his girlfriend's perfectly shaped boobs, goes home talks and talks and talks and talks about his dead father, talks and talks and talks and talks about his evil uncle fucking his mom, talks and talks and talks and talks about his desire to murder his mom, talks and talks and talks and talks about his favorite types of poison, talks and talks and talks and talks about his favorite food. Then poisons all the food, every one drops dead. The End.

Fall of the House of Usher... a 13 page long sentence of one man talking about how his best friend is suicidally depressed and it's all the fault of his dank house and his incest marriage to his twin sister.

In all of these stories a character does nothing but sit on his ass and talk while drinking something. Tea, rum, ale, beer, milk that for some reason looks like blood because of the morbid depths of their mind, a bottle of poison... whatever... they sit, they talk, they drink, sit, talk, drink, sit, talk, drink... these great classic characters do so little action, they don't even shift in their chairs or stretch their legs. They sit. They talk. They sip their tea.

Jim sits, talks, and eats an apple.

Scrooge sits, talk, and eats a bit of moldy cheese.

They discuss their inner most feelings and emotions, and in some cases it takes them more than 300 pages of sitting on their asses doing nothing but drinking tea, just to tell you how they feel.

>a character is defined by their actions. That all other forms of expression, be they inner thoughts, emotional responses, even dialogue, are just noise. They are impermanent forms of character development and are essentially meaningless.

So how then, do you define the top 100 greatest classic characters of all time, when none of them ever got off their ases and stop monologuing emotionally into their tea long enough to even do the simplest of actions such as just standing up to stretch?

Are you going to tell me that the books widely touted as the top 100 greatest classics of world literature are essentially meaningless simply based on the fact that they were forms of expression, inner thoughts, emotional responses, and dialogue devoid of actions?

Please return to the book that gave you this very shitty advice, and find out what novels it's author wrote. Read the novels written by the author of this how-to-write book, and tell me, have they created fully fleshed out characters?

Oh wait... they haven't written any novels yet have they.

Not only have they not written any novels, but they also have never created characters.

In fact, the ONLY book they ever wrote was this clap assed peice of trash tin which they gave you the advice to not give your characters feelings or emotions.

Why are you taking the advice on how to do ANYTHING from someone who never did the thing they are advising you to do?

Why in the hell do so many newbie writers, head to people without experience for advice?

A novelist creates characters for a living. Some one who wrote one how-to-book never created characters and is just talking out their damned ass.

It is a deep disservice to budding authors for crap how-to-books like that to even be on the market.

If you want to be a better author and create better characters, then the first thing you need to do is seek out actual authors, people who create characters for a living, and ask them how they do their job. You'll get far better advice than anything some scam artist scraped off the internet and shoved into their so-called how-to-write book.

>slamming my brain against a wall trying to figure out HOW I write, because just writing stalled after 120k words, after I realized I was stuck in acts 1 and kinda 2.

Uhm... what are you writing?

Novels DO NOT have Acts, so there should be no Act 1 or Act 2.

120k words is what almost every publisher on the planet requests for a novel.

Only Play scripts (for stage or TV or movies) have acts, and scripts are 100% pure dialogue with no narration, and only fragments used at the top of each page to create action descriptions. And even the LONGEST 2 hour plays are under 100 pages long. 120k is WAY too long for a movie script and that's the longest plays publishable these days.

If you haven't got any characters even started to be created after 120k words, I'm struggling to imagine what in the heck you could possibly have written.

If your brain has stalled at 120k words then you've probably reached the end of your novel, except novels don't have acts and characters should be introduced on page 1.

Based on your description it appears that you have written something incredibly abstract and non standard.

I don't know how to advice you on what to d next as I am struggling to understand what it is you have done at all.

Based on the fact you have stated you get your advice from how-to-write books, I would ask you to better examine the books you get advice from, more specifically, examine the Amazon Author Pages of the authors of said How-to-write books, as it appears you have been given advice that is seriously flawed and was likely given to you by someone who never wrote a novel, never created a character, has no business giving novel writing advice, and is talking out their ass.

In order words, they gave you very bad advice, not only on character creation, but also on story structure (why do you think you need to write in "acts"?) as well as word count to aim for (too many words over 120k is just as bad as too few words under 120k in the minds of just about every publishing house as a typical novel is 120k words long.)

The reason I ask you to look to the author page on Amazon for the book giving you those very shoddy advice, is because around 90% of the "how to write" books written since 2013 are a load of crap written by MMO gurus of the Warrior's Forum.

MMO = Making Money Online.

Guru = scam artists.

Warriors Forum = the blackest, black hat website out there.

There is big business in writing books on how-to-write. So much big bucks can be had in it, that there exist today thousands of how-to-write books written by people who never word one single solitary word prior to writing said how-to-write book.

Go to the author page on Amazon, for every how-to-write book. What do you see? Do you see all the novels they have written? Or is the how-to-write book the ONLY book they've written? Or worse - are the only other books they wrote other self help books (how to lose weight; how to find love, how to get a ged, how to brush your cats, etc?)

If they never wrote a novel;, then don't buy their book of how-to-write.

It appears you've been given some seriously bad advice by people who have no clue on how to write novels.

Do not get novel writing advice, from someone who never wrote a novel. Their novel writing tips don't mean squat because they never put them into practice. Someone who never wrote a novel, has no clue what works and what doesn't work, because they never wrote a novel to test their theories with.

>This makes an interesting case for character development when it comes to planning. I won't say I've figured out the balance by any stretch of the imagination (I haven't even figured out what type of planner I am yet), but it gave me an idea on methodology.

While I agree it might make for an interesting writing prompt or writing challenge to help you develop your characters, I can't see doing it for any serious, long term project.

I wonder, too though, why do you feel the need to figure out what type of a planner you are? 

Figuring out the type of writer you are, is nothing but procrastination busy work that takes away from your writing.

Remember:

  • Writers, write.
  • Planning is NOT writing.
  • Creating characters, is NOT writing.
  • World builsing is NOT writing.
  • Deciding what genre to write, is NOT writing.
  • Outlining, is NOT writing.
  • Thinking abut writing, is NOT writing.
  • Talking about writing, is NOT writing.
  • Browsing writing forums, is NOT writing.
  • Only one thing is writing and that is writing itself.

Figuring out the type of writer, planner, outliner, plotter, pantser, whatever you are, is not going to do ANYTHING to help you become a better writer, and in fact, for most people finding out such things only stifles their ability to write.

>Has anyone else ever tried to plan by actions and reactions, completely ignoring thoughts and feelings in exchange for what your character would DO? I know it would create a flat story, but perhaps it would be a good way to both know your character and move the story along at the same time.

No. 

Why?

I don't plan.

I write.

Planning gets in the way of writing.

Planning takes time away from my writing, time that could be better spent writing.

Stop think. Stop planning. Get your fingers moving.

Remember:

  • planning is NOT writing; 
  • outlining is NOT writing; 
  • researching is NOT writing; 
  • daydreaming is NOT writing. 
  • reading books on how to write, is NOT writing
  • Only sitting your ass in your seat and doing actual writing, counts as writing.

If you ignore thoughts and feelings, you ignore your characters.

If you ignore your characters, you writing will be nothing but plot driven crap, devoid of heart and soul.

You could have the greatest plot in the world, but without living, breathing characters to move it forward, it's nothing but crap.

If you really want to become  better writer and create better characters, than you need to do one thing and one thing only: sit you ass in the chair and just write!

Live with passion. Write with passion. Never write anything you are not passionate about. That includes your characters. You should NEVER struggle to create a new character. Write. Write about your passion. Write about your characters. Write about their passion. Make your passion their passion. Write. Write. Write. And then write about them some more.

That really is the only way you're ever gonna get your characters written.








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