Looking to connect with me on social media? Links to all my official accounts can be found here:

<<<<---  If it is not on that list, it is not me. 

Please note that since 2013, there have shown up several FAKE "EelKat" accounts, often using photos stolen from my website. Those accounts are run by a stalker who also goes by the names Kendra Silvermander & Tom Addams. They are wanted by the FBI, so if you run across one of these fake accounts pretending to be me, please report it to FBI Agent in charge of the case: Andy Drewer.

Cost of Living for Self-Published Kindle Authors

(The original email this was answering has been misplaced. If I locate it, I'll add it here.)

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Not sure I'd know how to figure an answer out for this, but I can tell you of a test I tried first of the month. I put out a new title, than sent the link for it to the 2,400 of my more devoted fans (I've 7,000 who buy stuff off and on, but of those only 2,400 buy more or less regular, and these are also the ones who interact with me on social networks and show up at car shows and book signings to hang out with me during events - I've meet most of these 2,400 people, some of them more than once; however as I rarely tell anyone I've released a new title it can take a few months before sales trickle in). Anyways, usually I just publish a new title than start working on the next one. I don't announce the new release, don't email anyone the link, nothing. Sales are sporadic, rarely start the first week, and can take a few weeks to start. (Short stories so, this is typical.)

However, for this title, I decided to send out a message announcing it (I've never done that before). So I did my usual weekly update of "Here's what happened to me, here's new pics of my cats, here's what my dog's been up to, here are the latest shows my cars will be featured in, here's my latest rant on the current lack health care conditions in Maine, along with the latest LePage veto on Medicare, more doctors gone on strike, 70,000 more Mainers lost health insurance this week, record breaking lines at the free clinic due to the ER turning away so many uninsured folks (I know I was one of them, broke my leg, took 3 weeks of waiting in line at the clinic to get it checked because the ER is basically out of operation) long rave and rant on medical strike and the fact that there are lines of people outside the hospital trying to get in, why are doctors allowed to go on strike, Veterans hospital is now taking non Veteran emergency patients, their doctors are declaring Maine in a medical crisis, blah, blah, blah, ...and Oh, by the way, I just released a new title, here it is...." 

At the end of the day I checked my dashboard and saw that title had 27 sales. That's a little over 1% of my "die-hard fans" who bought the book the first day as a direct result of the announcement. That's the same total I can usually expect to see across the entire first month, as 1 or 2 sales a day, not every day, is pretty typical for my short stories.

Not sure that that means anything to help with your question or not. How does 27 sales out of 2,400 fans translate into:

  • a. Break even
  • b. Make some money
  • c. Hit it big

To answer A: Well for the title in question, it was a 2,500 word short that took me about 7 hours to write. I wrote it one day. Edited it the next day using a free editing software program. Created the cover using free images off of mourgefiles with a free photoshop-like program called ChasyDraw. So basically I didn't put any money into it at all. I put maybe 15 hours total into it's creation from start to finish. Okay, because no money was put into it, we'll just assume that the cost of the electricity/office/computer/other overhead is equal to minimum wage, for easy sake of argument.

Right now (2013) minimum wage is $5.13 per how. There is talk it'll increase to $7.30 soon. If I figure on minimum wage at $7.50 an hour x 15 hours, than I'll need to earn $112 per week to break even. However it's selling at .99c (because I automatically price everything under 5k words at .99c regardless of what it is.) So those 27 sales x 35% of .99c = just under $10. So I have to sell 330 copies to break even at minimum wage for this particular title.

However, I don't like minimum wage, so I'm going to say I want to be paid something a little more professional, let's say $15 an hour (twice minimum wage). Well that now means I'd have to sell 660 copies per week to break even.

To answer B: We continue from A, and every title sold past the 661st copy becomes profit. Is it enough to live on? Well, if it sells the typical average of 1 to 2 copies a day at .35c per sale, that's only an income of .70c per day, so no, that isn't enough to live on, not it it's the only title. 

To make money is going to require a lot more sales, a lot more titles, and also titles priced at $2.99 or higher.

I figured it out once, and because I live in a motorhome my expenses are a 1/3 what they were when I used to live in a house. No electricity bill to pay any more. Plus I lack bills other authors have: No phone bill (near mute Autistic person without enough vocal ability to communicate effectively over a phone), no cable (seeing how I do not own a TV - I do own a portable DVD player and full season collections of MANY TV series to make up for the lack of a TV though.)

My gas bills are higher than most, however, due to the 200lbs of marbles glued to the hood of my daily driver Volvo which used to get 22mpg but now gets only 14mpg thanks to the weight and lack of air flow of the rhinestones/beads/marbles and than the 7mpg the RV gets, and I have no idea how much mpg the 22' 1964 Dodge police car gets, but when it eats more lead than gas and you have to mix your own gas because nobody sells leaded gas anymore, well whose counting miles anymore?

The only real bill I have is the comic book collection which requires a 48ft by 28ft storage unit to house. My comic books when bagged, boarded, and started are taller, longer, and wider than my motorhome and my car lined up end to end. I have a lot of comic books. They don't fit in the library either, I own a library, private collection, 12,000 books at last count several years ago.

I buy 800 books a month, I haven't dared recount - it takes months to do. Food wise, it's me, 12 cats, a rabbit, and a teeny-tiny dog who only comes up to the knees of the cats.

The biggest expense is the animal shelter - 500 cats, birds, and horses that take up 4 to 8 hours a day just to feed them all. (My partner, has his own house, I have phobia issues, a result of a bomb in my house, which is why I live in a RV now, seeing as I'm no longer able to set a feet in a house since the bomb. So he has a new house, where he lives and I live in a motorhome in the driveway for the past 7 years since the bomb.) Well my partner pays for the book storage and I'm slowly retiring from the shelter/rescue and my brother is doing more and more of the work, slowly taking over that business.

My health has become an issue and I simply can not run a massive animal rescue on that scale anymore, so by the end of the year I likely will still own but no longer be running the shelter.

In the end, with my partner paying for the books and the shelter changing hands, the only expenses I now have are gas for my cars and RV and food for me, the 12 cats, the rabbit, and the dog. I boondock, meaning I have no running water, no hook-ups, no electricity, no sewer. Nothing on board. Catlitter. A 30lb bag of dogfood last 6 months thats $24 a year. Catfood 36lbs a week at $18 a bag is $950 a year. Rabbit eats vegetable scraps from my food. My food $20 tp $50 a week = at most $2,000 a year. Gas? I'm pretty much permanently parked.

The RV rarely moves, when it does it's just to drive the cats around the neighborhood to keep the engine from sticking. I only go out to buy food once ever couple of months, and I attend events on weekends but none of those are far away, so I'm not using much more than $60 a month. I can (and have for the past 7 years) live quite well on an income of $200 to $600 a month.

Thing is I used to be very wealthy, and I still have all the rare books, insanely expensive cars, antique kimonos, and lots of furs, but the bomb did change me a lot. Hurricane Katrina took the house down and we started rebuilding, but 6 months the bomber arrived and the only stuff that survived the bomb was the stuff that was in storage. And $3million in medical bills later, we had no money to rebuild again. The bomb did more damage than what people are aware of. The $3million in medical bills those were just the first few weeks after the bomb...the bills are still rising. New bills arrive every month $13,000 a day for one machine. I stopped adding the totals up after it hit $3million. That was 7 years ago. I broke my leg 4 weeks ago - I was denied ER treatment, because my outstanding bill was too high. I was turned away from the free clinic 3 times.

I was homeless out of necessity for 6 months, and than I moved back indoors and discovered I had developed a massive, horrible phobia of being indoors. It was so bad, that I became "willfully" homeless, because I was unable to feel safe living indoors ever since the bomb. It took me 6 years living in my car to be able to progress to living in a motorhome. Will I ever work my way back up to living in a house again? I don't know. All I know is someone tried to kill me and my family and not everyone survived the bomb and 7 years later I'm still not able to function yet.

Money lost it's importance to me. I lost my husband. And my baby. Baby's dead, husband's not. He remembers me as very good friend. 21 years of marriage is gone. He has no memory of me as his wife, at all. He doesn't remember the baby either. He's alive but it's worse than if he was dead. To look in his eyes and see nothing. That's why money means nothing to me now. What I've lost money can't bring back.

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By EelKat Wendy C Allen

Books By EelKat
Currently Available on Amazon Kindle:


And why 27 books were deleted off Amazon after being banned by The Old Orchard Beach, Maine Town Hall, an American Government organization, on January 4, 2016, for being "Too Gay For The Family Friendly Town of Old Orchard Beach".

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The Top 202 Most Visited Pages of 2017

Seeing how on October 15, 2017, we reached 10,000 pages, I thought it'd be fun to update the Top 100 List and see where were were now.

Top 202 Most Viewed Pages Of 2017 So Far
(Out of 10,000 pages)

(January 2017 to October 2017)
(Excluding the Home PageAbout Page, and Site Map Page, which were the top 3)

  1. Amphibious Aliens: The Story of Etiole & The World's Most Haunted Car
  2. The GoldenEagle: An Auto-biography of the World's Most Haunted Car
  3. Medieval Servants: Their jobs and their place in historical fiction.
  4. How Long is 50,000 Words?
  5. On being a handicapped CosPlayer at PortCon Maine 2017
  6. Stephen King's The Thinner and The Gypsies Of Old Orchard Beach, Maine
  7. Writing Mute Characters
  8. Flamboyant Nipples: The KKK's New Gay Hating Site About Old Orchard Beach | The Site That Makes Fun of Terrorist Hate Crimes
  9. Writing Dares Random Generator
  10. Don't put flyers on people's cars...
  11. The Saco River Curse
  12. Our Primary Site Topic Is Small Penis? Reaching #1 on Page 1 of Google.
  13. Help FBI End Anti-Gay White Power Terrorist Attacks of Old Orchard Beach
  14. Creating Character Profiles | Meet The Characters | Who Is Quaraun?
  15. Introduction To The Quaraun Series: aka Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach
  16. The Dazzling Razzberry aka EelKat's Autism Awareness Car
  17. Autism, Asperger, PTSD, & Mad Cow: Writing Clinical Insanity Accurately | What is wrong with Quaraun? 
  18. Quaraun Free To Read Online Complete Chapter Index In Chronological Order
  19. Necromancy: Fact Vs Fiction; Or How Can You Be A Necromancer In Real Life?
  20. 600 Pages: Epic Big Super Sized Novels and Why You Should Never Write One
  21. Why Crude Adult Comedy and Pink Humor Yaoi Is Not Erotica
  22. The FBI In Old Orchard Beach, Maine Trying To Capture A Domestic Terrorist
  23. One Gypsy's Review of My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding
  24. The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - page 1 (Online Release of Banned Book)
  25. Autism, Asperger's, And The Danger of The Self-Diagnosis
  26. Spell Casting Side Effects: Magic In Quaraun's Universe | Author Interview
  27. What Type of Music Does A Gypsy Listen To? My Top 10 Favorite Bands
  28. Beware of White Men In Gypsy Clothing: Fake Psychic Scams
  29. How long does it take to hit 1667 words?
  30. How to Write A Kiss
  31. Phookas
  32. Creating Character Profiles | Meet The Characters | Who Is GhoulSpawn?
  33. Albino Races - Moon Elves In The Quaraun Series
  34. Daily Writing Prompts (June 2017 Archive)
  35. My 30th Anniversary of Being Transgender
  36. Why Are The Quaraun Books Rated M18+
  37. How to Write Hot Sex - Tips For Erotic Romance Authors
  38. The Zaharam-Chapelle-Parunas Ethnographical World Building Questionnaire
  39. The Jiggler & The G-String Teddy Bears | The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane
  40. What exactly makes an Elf an Elf? (What is the definition of an Elf?)
  41. Online Income: The Reality vs The Fantasy
  42. World's Most Haunted Car Merchandise
  43. I Am Not GhoulSpawn | Excerpt From Rose Garden of The Pink Necromancer
  44. Old Orchard Beach Hate Crimes
  45. BoomFuzzy Chapter 1 (Novel Excerpt - Quaraun The Insane)
  46. How can your books have gay transvestite characters and not be Erotica? or Why are gay haters beating up elderly woman for wearing pink for breast cancer awareness and saying she's a transexual because only transexuals wear pink?
  47. EelKat's Guide To NaNoWriMo Featuring The 13 Step Method To Writing
  48. Autism and the Stigmas - Why Can’t You Accept Me As Me?
  49. Maine UFO Sightings
  50. Page 11 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - The Scottish Traveller Crime Family
  51. Psychedelics In A 'High' High Fantasy World (High Elves Getting High)
  52. KBoards, The NaNoWriMo ML Rumor & The Vindictive Stalker
  53. Writing Racist Characters VS The Ku Klux Klan In Old Orchard Beach, Maine
  54. Captured By The Lich Lord | The Night of The Screaming Unicorn
  55. How To Build A Magic System
  56. I've everything but a kitchen sink. Wait, how'd that sink get in my pocket?
  57. Stephen King's Thinner Gypsies & The Ku Klux Klan of Old Orchard Beach
  58. Autistic Characters In Fiction
  59. City of The Slushies | Chapter 7 | Quaraun The Insane
  60. Manuscript Reading Services or Will You Read My Book and Tell Me What You Think?
  61. Suicide, Rape, and Abuse In The Quaraun Series
  62. Wizards vs Witches vs Sorcerers: How are they different? | Writing Fantasy Books
  63. FRED: Google's Most Deadly Update Ever?
  64. How To Write A Novel: Question Everything Before Putting It In Your World
  65. Content writing: How long do you spend creating a quality blog post?
  66. SBI: To Review or Not to Review? That Is The Question
  67. Twerking Dragons: The Joys Of Writing A Novel With A Voice Recorder
  68. A Day At Witch Pond & Fleeing To The Forest | Summoner of Darkness
  69. Transgender, Transsexual, Transvestite, or Intersex: What Is Quaraun?
  70. Sheep | GhoulSpawn The Crazed & The Rose Garden of The Pink Necromancer
  71. Colour Magic - Gypsy Style
  72. Ideas, Ideas, Ideas (Where Do You Get Them?)
  73. Keywords & Pigeons: How I Do Local Business Marketing
  74. Quaraun & Autism In Fantasy Novels
  75. The Signs Of Old Orchard Beach & The FBI Investigation Of The Town Hall
  76. Tom Addams & The Warrior's Forum
  77. A Field of Poppies On The Road To Witch Pond | Summoner of Darkness
  78. An Elf and a Lich in the Gingerbread Pit | The Night of The Screaming Unicorn
  79. Markiplier Jacksepticeye and Pewdiepie Play Resident Evil 7
  80. Santa Claus: Lich Of The North Pole (Includes NSFW 18+ CBT Yaoi scene)
  81. A Motorhome named 'No Hurry' becomes Rosebud & The Story of Ten Kidnapped Cats
  82. Create Original Content aka I Hate Jackass Gutter Scum Thieves
  83. Lost In a Space That Isn't There: Going North To Head South
  84. An Elf Gone Mad: The Rise of The Pink Necromancer
  85. Aspergers is NOT Autism
  86. Is The Quaraun Series Erotica? - No! Here's why...
  87. Summoner of Darkness: GhoulSpawn and Quaraun Trapped With A Phooka
  88. The Dungeon Master & The 1974 AMC Gremlin
  89. The Lich's True Form Revealed | The Night of The Screaming Unicorn
  90. Using work you already started for national novel writing month?
  91. World-building In The Quaraun Series: Creating a Fantasy World
  92. Books in Vacationland 2017
  93. BoomFuzzy's Gingerbread House From Hell
  94. Lets Playing Is No Longer Fun
  95. Santa's Floating Dead Body | A Scene From The Summoner of Darkness
  96. The Banshee Sisters: Bean-Nighe and Ben-Neeyah In the Swamp of Death
  97. The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - page 2 (Online Release of Banned Book)
  98. What vlogging equipment is needed to get started as a YouTube vlogger?
  99. April 2015 Update: Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach: The Kidnapped Cats
  100. Betta Fish Aesthetic on Pinterest
  101. Domain Name Branding: Should You Put Your Brand Name In Your URL?
  102. Life As A YouTuber: How To Earn An Income From Making Videos
  103. Making YouTube Videos: How did you decide what content to make?
  104. Page 4 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  105. Twighilight Not Twilight
  106. YouTube Index
  107. Amphibious Aliens: My health since the stroke and Etiole . . .
  108. Are You A Satan Worshiper?
  109. Average Typing Speed
  110. Custom Leggings - Designs By EelKat
  111. Ernest Hemingway Style of Writing Literary Fiction Used In Epic Fantasy Novels
  112. Google Flagged Your Site! What To Do? (Help For Web Masters)
  113. How valuable is a writer’s group?
  114. Lives Destroyed: Amphibious Aliens 10th Anniversary Update
  115. Lost In a Space That Isn't There: Santa's Letter To Satan
  116. Summoner of Darkness: Quaraun Meets The Gremlin
  117. The Terrorists of Old Orchard Beach Put My Dad In a Coma
  118. Using Yahoo Answers to promote your book and author website.
  119. What Is This Site?
  120. You Stole My Idea - I was writing a book, but you already wrote it 10 years ago!
  121. City of The Slushies | Chapter 1 | Quaraun The Insane
  122. Creative Writing Story Prompts: September 2017 Edition
  123. Dungeons and Dragons: The Joys Of Calculating Gold Weight In AD&D 2ed
  124. Fabric Designed By EelKat
  125. My Fave YouTubers Play: Dream Daddy - The Yaoi Dad Dating Sim Otome Game
  126. Necromancy: How will resurrection affect society as a whole?
  127. Page 7 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  128. Pink Flowers Aesthetic on Pinterest
  129. The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - page 12 (Online Release of Banned Book)
  130. What will a traveler encounter on the roads in your world?
  131. Are you insane? Am I? Let's Find Out...
  132. Becoming A Better Writer: How to write interesting dialogue.
  133. Character Creation
  134. Copper Cockeral Cards & Gifts
  135. Elves, Drugs, and Opium: A Look At The Drug Use In The Quaraun Books
  136. How To Stay Motivated To Write | Writing Fantasy Books
  137. Jewelry Fashions in Moon Elf Culture | World Building | Writing Fantasy Books
  138. Keyword Marketing - What to do when your best keywords are low demand
  139. Magic Systems and How to Build Them | Writing Fantasy Books
  140. NaNoWriMo Overachievers: How did you do it?
  141. Quaraun Cover Art Gallery | Fantasy Novel Book Cover Art
  142. Quaraun The Insane : Zebulon's Captive: The Last of The Moon Elves
  143. SEO Advantages of Embedding YouTube Videos On Your Website
  144. Summoner of Darkness: A Tavern Scene - Chastity Cages, and Whores
  145. Summoner of Darkness: The Return of ZooLock (free to read online)
  146. Twighlight Not Twilight Part 2
  147. Vanishing Books Update - Why 27 of my books were deleted off Amazon
  148. What is a God in Your Universe? | World Building | Writing Fantasy Books
  149. Writing Maine: How To Write About Maine Life Accurately
  150. What the Ocean Gives Me (How Things In Your Life Affect Your Writing)
  151. City of The Slushies | Chapter 14 | Quaraun The Insane
  152. February 10, 2008 - Harassment Continues in Old Orchard Beach, Maine
  153. How does a bestselling book become a bestseller?
  154. Marriage in Moon Elf Culture | World Building | Writing Fantasy Books
  155. People are not interested in long winded copy
  156. September 26, 2017 - The Latest Attack By The KKK on The Thinner Gypsies
  157. Spending Money To Make Money Online? Should You Do It?
  158. Summoner of Darkness: The Demon Cultists and The Coming of The Darkness
  159. Summoner of Darkness: The Map of The Town (novel free to read online)
  160. The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt GOTY | Completionist Run: Episode 01
  161. Trespassers: April 2007 Updates
  162. Turning Scenes, Into Stories & Writing Travelogue Style Fantasy Books
  163. Where To Get Endless Ideas For Short Stories, Novels, and Articles
  164. Writing Controversial Books: Political Correctness & White Supremacists
  165. Are Bad Reviews Good For You?
  166. Branding Yourself While Avoiding The Scams | EelKat On Content Writing
  167. Child Sacrifice in Fantasy Novels | Writing Fantasy Books
  168. How to Handle Writing Fantasy-Horror That Features Violence Against Children
  169. How would you explain your Fantasy world to a stranger?
  170. Page 6 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  171. Summoner of Darkness: HellBorne The Evil, Lord of Black Tower
  172. The return of Friends Are Forever - Banned and Burned it's about to be reborn!
  173. Why do Lovecraftian beings come to earth?
  174. Writing Prompts Syndrome?
  175. Autism = The Crazy Cat Woman of Maine
  176. Autism: Understanding what is really going on inside the child’s head.
  177. But what exactly IS a full time income?
  178. Content Marketing & writing: How I write content for my website
  179. Do you write a novel start-to-finish?
  180. GhoulSpawn and The Lich Lord's Lover: How To Kill a Lich
  181. How is it that the church leaders are claiming you do not pay tithes?
  182. How To Write A Novel: In what order do you create your world?
  183. I loved my children but I loved BoomFuzzy more | From Quaraun The Insane
  184. My Two Favorite People: FarDarrig and The Baby That Never Should Have Been
  185. Need help writing characters of color | EelKat on racist white readers
  186. Quaraun and the Amazon Adult Filter
  187. Quaraun GhoulSpawn and The Lich Lord's Lover: The Lover's Triangle
  188. Summoner of Darkness: Where Are You Hiding That Horse?
  189. Tired of people who don’t care. :( Tired of the harassment. :(
  190. What would happen if an Elf adopted a Human baby? | Writing Fantasy Books
  191. Page 10 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  192. Page 3 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  193. Page 8 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach
  194. SCRIPT FRENZY 2010: I WON! & Psycho Stalker Attacks
  195. Wristlets, Wrist Bags, Mini Clutch, Cosmetic Bags, and Designer Mini Purses
  196. Writing Your Novel: Do you save chapters as individual files?
  197. Are old AD&D adventures still any use to current players?
  198. Autistics Have Feelings Too & Diverse Books Rant
  199. Be True To You: YouTube Gamers: "Faking" a personality until you make it?
  200. City of The Slushies | Chapter 10 | Quaraun The Insane
  201. HEA in Erotica (Should You Write Happily Ever Afters?)
  202. Stephen King's Thinner Gypsies

dancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing bananadancing banana

“Karma comes after everyone eventually. You can't get away with screwing people over your whole life, I don't care who you are. What goes aroMy Two Favorite People: FarDarrig and The Baby That Never Should Have Been

Need help writing characters of color | EelKat on racist white readers

und comes around. That's how it works. Sooner or later the universe will serve you the revenge that you deserve.” 

― Jessica Brody

"By autistic standards, the “normal” brain is easily distractible, is obsessively social, and suffers from a deficit of attention to detail and routine. Thus people on the spectrum experience the neurotypical world as relentlessly unpredictable and chaotic, perpetually turned up too loud, and full of people who have little respect for personal space." 

— Steve Silberman

Attempt Something New Today! – too many people talk about doing this or that but few actually take action, it's the why behind why so few succeed and so many fail.

I'm not made of money, I'm made out of glitter and kittens. 

~CinnamonToastKen 2017

“When people see you're happy doing what you're doing, it sort of takes the power away from them to tease you about it.” 

― Wendy Mass, Every Soul a Star

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“If you're horrible to me, I'm going to write a song about it, and you won't like it. That's how I operate.” 

― Taylor Swift

Bullies should never force you to  suffer in silence. If someone has hurt you, let others know.

“One's dignity may be assaulted, vandalized and cruelly mocked, but it can never be taken away unless it is surrendered.” 
― Michael J. Fox

“I would rather be a little nobody, then to be a evil somebody.” 

― Abraham Lincoln


"Do not fear people with Autism, embrace them, Do not spite people with Autism unite them, Do not deny people with Autism accept them for then their abilities will shine" 

— Paul Isaacs

Be the hero, not the bully.

“1. Bullying is not okay. Period.

2. Freedom of religion does not give you the right to physically or verbally assault people.

3. If your sincerely-held religious beliefs require you to bully children, then your beliefs are fucked up.” 

― Jim C. Hines

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