Pink Sheep, Cheesy Burritos, and The Grim Reality of Zombies

The Blue Monkey rocked gently on the river’s slow current, sunlight gleaming off its polished brass fittings. With each passing month the outfall dust of the comet hitting the moon, grew less thick, allowing faint shimmers of sunlight to reach the earth’s surface. After two thousand years of darkness, frozen algae, and snow, life was returning to earth, now called Vesonta, as the ice age’s end slowly creeped in.

Quaraun took advantage of rare sun filtered days like this to be on deck. But, his sprained ankle was reminding him of the zombie attack a few weeks ago. The attack when GhoulSpawn had saved his life, by unceremoniously dragging The Pink Necromancer out of a herd of zombies which had been fast surrounding him and he had been making no move to escape.

Anger boiled in Quaraun’s mind as he glared down at his sprained ankle. An ankle twisted when GhoulSpawn had grabbed him and pulled him away from the zombies.

For the past week GhoulSpawn had been chasing sheep through the many decks and staterooms of the massive paddlewheel flat-bottomed steam ship. A task Quaraun had given GhoulSpawn as punishment for his sprained ankle. A task that was nearing completion.

Quaraun watched GhoulSpawn shearing yet another sheep, then glared down at his sprained ankle and scowled. He had to think of something else for GhoulSpawn to do once the sheep shearing was finally completed.

The deck, usually pristine, was chaos incarnate. Wool was piled in tangled heaps, tufts clinging to railings and drifting lazily on the breeze. Goblins darted around, stuffing the unruly piles into makeshift bales under Quaraun’s withering glare.

Quaraun hobbled across the deck, his cane thudding against the planks. His lame leg throbbed with each step, the strain worsened by the weight of his pregnancy. Despite the discomfort, he refused to sit still. His long pink robes billowed as he gestured wildly at the Goblins.

"Faster!" Quaraun barked. "And watch the edges! I won’t have wool spilling into the river! You drop even one fluff of wool in there and I will toss you in to fish it out!"

The Goblins quickly scurried to sweep the wool away from the edge. They knew all too well Quaraun’s words were not an empty threat. The Pink Necromancer had been kicking Goblins overboard all morning.

Nearby, GhoulSpawn wrestled with a particularly stubborn sheep, its ivory fleece shimmering in the sunlight, in contrast to his own glittering gold fleece. Half the flock had already been sheared, their awkwardly bare forms bleating indignantly. The rest milled about, wary of the Demon scientist turned sorcerer’s apprentice wielding oversized shears.

Quaraun swooped flamboyantly across the deck. He knew exactly what task GhoulSpawn should do next.

"You want what?" GhoulSpawn demanded, panting as the sheep attempted to headbutt him.

"I said dye them pink," Quaraun snapped, his silver jellyfish tentacle hair bristling in irritation.

"That’s not how dyeing wool works, Quaraun," GhoulSpawn argued, wiping sweat from his brow. "You can’t just dye the sheep and expect the fleece to stay pink when it grows back, you know — "

"Yes. I know. I am the master weaver and I know precisely what I am doing. Dye my sheep pink."

"You’re the master lunatic is what you are."

“I have a broken leg because of you.”

“You’re leg is not broken. You have a sprained ankle!”

"Do as I say, Glinta."

GhoulSpawn threw up his hands.

"Fine! But when these sheep end up looking like blotchy circus clowns, don’t blame me."

Quaraun ignored him, turning his attention to the Goblins lugging heavy dye vats onto the deck. He instructed them to mix his special seaweed powder, the vibrant pink hue swirling through the water.

"Careful!" Quaraun shrieked as one Goblin sloshed dye over the edge of the vat. "You will stain the deck! I will not have pink floorboards on my blue ship!”

The commotion drew The UnSeelie Court’s Phookan King from the galley, where he had been cooking dinner for the group, wiping his flour-dusted hands on his black and purple striped apron. BoomFuzzy’s grey dreadlocks were tied back, and his thick woolen beard glinted with purple ribbons tied in to keep his long beard out of the way while cooking.

"What in blazes is goin' on out here?" BoomFuzzy asked, grinning at the spectacle. “Yar all screaming enough to rock the boat.”

"Quaraun’s lost his mind," GhoulSpawn grumbled, trying to coax the sheep toward the dye vat. “He’s making me dye his sheep pink!”

"I have not lost my mind," Quaraun huffed. "These sheep need to be pink. It is efficient."

BoomFuzzy chuckled, watching GhoulSpawn struggle to lift the squirming sheep. The beast bleated furiously, splashing dye everywhere. Quaraun screeched as pink droplets spattered his silk robes.

“Watch where you are splashing!”

"Now ya've done it," BoomFuzzy teased. "Got the JellyElf all riled up."

"I’m going to murder that sheep," GhoulSpawn muttered darkly.

"Ach, leave the poor beastie be." BoomFuzzy waved a hand dismissively. "Come on, lads. I’ve got baked bean and cheese burritos topped wi' mushrooms, black olives, and extra cheese waitin' in the galley. Let's take a break from this madness."

Quaraun scowled but relented as his aching body reminded him he hadn’t eaten in hours. BoomFuzzy's cooking was always irresistible.

The ballroom floor had been cleared, soft rugs spread out for comfort. The handmaids, children, and various servants gathered around on the big floor cushions, as BoomFuzzy laid out trays piled high with steaming burritos. The rich aroma of melted cheese and savoury beans filled the air.

Quaraun eased himself down with a wince, grateful for the cushions beneath him. BoomFuzzy sat beside him, wrapping a protective arm around his shoulders.

GhoulSpawn flopped onto the floor, still muttering about sheep dyeing disasters.

The first bite was heavenly — warm, cheesy goodness that melted in their mouths. Quaraun sighed, tension easing from his body. Even the chaos on deck faded from his mind.

The children giggled as they recounted GhoulSpawn's attempts to dunk a sheep in the dye vat.

"It kept kicking and bleating!" one child exclaimed.

"You should’ve seen Ghouly’s face," another added, laughing.

Even Quaraun couldn’t help but chuckle.

BoomFuzzy grinned.

As laughter filled the room, the worries of their harsh world seemed distant. For a moment, surrounded by family and the comforting warmth of BoomFuzzy's cooking, life felt simple and joyful.

Quaraun leaned against BoomFuzzy, smiling despite himself.

"Thank you, Unicorn."

"Aye, Love," BoomFuzzy murmured, pressing a kiss to his temple. "Always."

After the meal, Quaraun ushered the Goblins back outside to finish baling up the wool, while his handmaids and children followed him to the deck.

GhoulSpawn started to leave, but BoomFuzzy stopped him.

“Come sit with me, Ghouly. Have a rest. Me Court Mage has been running ya ragged all week.”

GhoulSpawn sat beside BoomFuzzy, his voice hesitant.

"He's really mad at me, isn't he?"

BoomFuzzy glanced at him, expression weary but calm.

"Aye, Ghouly. Ya mucked it up this time."

"I just—" GhoulSpawn rubbed the back of his neck. "I don’t get it. I mean, I know he got hurt, but I wasn’t trying to hurt him. I was trying to save him. There were zombies everywhere. He wouldn’t move. They were surrounding him. I had to drag him away. And it was almost a month ago now. His ankle is nearly healed. He’s up walking around again."

“Ya doesn’t know why he’s angry with ya, do you? He’s no upset about his sprained ankle. That’s just an excuse on account of he cannae bring himself to say what is actually upsetting him.”

“If not his ankle, what then?”

BoomFuzzy’s lips thinned, and he stared into the distance.

"Did ye nae see 'em?"

"See who?"

"The bairns."

GhoulSpawn frowned, confusion knitting his brow.

"What bairns?"

BoomFuzzy sighed deeply, as if bearing the weight of centuries.

"Ruby, Sapphire, Opal, an’ Diamond."

The names hung in the air, strange and familiar all at once.

GhoulSpawn blinked.

"The zombie kids? Those four that keep showing up?"

BoomFuzzy nodded slowly.

"Aye.”

“Yeah. I saw them. They were leading the herd.”

“They were the first zombies.”

“What, you mean like the very first ones? The ones who started the zombie plague?”

“Aye. After I died, Quaraun tried to resurrect me, which, as ya can see, he did. I was the first UnDead. He made a spell that bound my soul to his, and allowed me to be alive again, sort of, as a Lich, but in order to power the spell, he had to make a sacrifice. He had to kill his own children and give their souls to the Ferryman in exchange for my soul to be released. Ruby and Sapphire, twin girls age twelve, and Opal and Diamond, twin boys aged ten. Quaraun loved his children, but he loved me more, so he poisoned their food, and when they fell into a coma, he cut out their hearts and gave them to the Ferryman. The RiverBoat ManWoman who you see following us. The Ferryman gave Quaraun my soul. And Quaraun resurrected me as a Lich. And in doing so, also accidentally resurrected Ruby as a zombie. Ruby bargained with The RiverBoat ManWoman to unleash all dead on the world as zombies, in exchange for what, we do not know.”

“They were there. The four zombie children. I saw them. That’s why I pulled Quaraun away. It was like he was mesmerized by them. The girl was reaching out to him, and was walking right to her — ”

“That was Ruby. She does that.”

“I had to pull him away, they would have killed him.”

“Them’s his firstborns."

GhoulSpawn's stomach twisted.

"His... what?"

"His children, Lad. Have ya not been listening to me? Been followin' us for near three hundred years now. Quaraun dunnae let anyone harm 'em. Believes their souls’re still trapped in them cursed bodies, an’ he’s always tryin' tae free 'em."

GhoulSpawn's mouth went dry.

"I didn’t know."

"I figured as much," BoomFuzzy said quietly. "Else ya wouldn’t've dragged him away like that. He was tryin' tae talk tae 'em, nae run. Been followin’ us fer centuries now. He won’t let anyone destroy ’em. Believes their souls are still in there, trapped, waitin’ tae be freed, ya interrupted that."

GhoulSpawn stared, the revelation sinking in like ice.

“I… I didn’t know.”

A heavy silence settled between them, broken only by the crackle of the fire.

"There’s more," BoomFuzzy continued, his voice grim. "We’ve lost bairns tae sickness. We used tae have a much bigger group, more children. Some got sick, turned, an’ attacked the rest. Quaraun nearly lost his mind after that."

GhoulSpawn's gaze dropped to the ground.

“He didn’t used to be a neat freak. But the young’ngs got sick. Germs. Being dirty. Spreads disease. Don’t know what they had, we ain’t got no medical doctors no more. He convinced himself they got sick from not being clean enough. Now he can’t stop cleaning everything, terrified if one speck of dust slips through, one of his bairns’ll get sick and die and come back as a zombie and kill the rest. Because it happened before.”

"No wonder he's so obsessed with cleanliness."

BoomFuzzy huffed a bitter laugh.

"Aye. Obsessively so. Sweepin’ dirt roads, scrubbin’ rocks — it’s nae just madness. It’s fear. He dunnae want tae lose more o’ his family. He sweeps dirt roads, for cryin' out loud. It ain’t just about germs. It's fear. Terrified it'll happen again. That he'll lose more o’ his bairns."

GhoulSpawn swallowed hard.

"I had no idea."

BoomFuzzy’s tone softened.

"There’s a lot ya dunnae ken, lad. Quaraun dunnae talk about painful things. Keeps it all bottled up inside." He paused, his expression darkening. "An’ then there was the stillbirth."

GhoulSpawn's eyes widened.

"Stillbirth?"

"Aye. Nearly killed 'im. The wee bairn died in the womb, we knew it was dead, before we had time to decide how to deal with it, it turned into a zombie while it was still inside him. We had tae remove it before it could be born proper." BoomFuzzy’s voice grew heavy with sorrow. "It wasn’t the first o’ his children tae turn, but it was the hardest. Tore 'im apart, body an' soul. A zombie before it even drew breath. We had tae remove it tae save Quaraun’s life. Tore ‘im apart inside, in more ways than one."

GhoulSpawn's heart ached for Quaraun.

"I didn't know any of this." GhoulSpawn felt a lump in his throat. “I didn’t know.”

“Quaraun dunnae like talkin’ about painful things. Keeps it all bottled up, but ye need tae understand this, Ghouly — he’s hurtin’. Always has been. Ya dragged ‘im away from those bairns at the last attack, nae knowin’ what they meant tae him. That’s why he’s so mad at ya.”

BoomFuzzy placed a firm hand on GhoulSpawn’s shoulder.

"Ya do now. But listen, Ghouly, Quaraun needs ya tae understand this. He ain’t just mad at ya for draggin' 'im away. He’s hurt. Every time he loses one o’ his bairns, it rips 'im open all over again. An’ ya need tae be mindful o’ that."

GhoulSpawn nodded solemnly.

"I will be. I promise."

BoomFuzzy’s grip tightened briefly before he let go.

“He’s having trouble with this pregnancy, and we’ve not got a midwife with us this time. He’s scared. Women and children, don’t live long in this world. Have ya ever noticed how few there are in any settlement we find?”

“I had.”

“A lot of women die while pregnant. A lot of babies die before they are born. Most babes die before they are toddlers. And all become zombies within an hour or so of death. Quaraun been pregnant dozens of times now. Miscarriages, stillborn, infant deaths, toddler deaths, we’ve seen them so many times now. Ya see how many bairns we have. He’s given birth to three times that many. It’s hard on him. All turned. Every one. Turned and then killed others before we could stop them. Dozens of our bairns are buried along the the many miles of this river. You see Quaraun has high strung and irrational, because ya don’t know how he got that way. I see him as very frustrated, very sad, and scared out of his mind of seeing more of his wee ones turn into zombies. You think on that, while ya out there dyeing those pink sheep.”

A few hours later…

The acrid scent of dye filled the deck of the Blue Monkey.

Rows of dye vats lined the decks of the blue riverboat. While GhoulSpawn struggled to get wriggling sheep into some dye vats, Quaraun delicately dyed wool yarn in others.

“Quaraun?” GhoulSpawn said quietly, as he approached the Elf. “Can I take a break? My back is killing me. These sheep are heavy. They keep kicking me in the stomach.”

“Try being pregnant,” Quaraun said without looking up from his work.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“Everything?”

Quaraun stood up straight to stare up at the tall Satyr. Behind him a sheep lept out of dye vat knocking it over. Pink dye flooded the floor.

Quaraun sighed.

“Go see if Unicorn needs your help with something. And while you are there, tell him to send some Goblins out to clean up this mess.”

“So I can take a break?”

“Yes.”

GhoulSpawn quickly trotted inside before Quaraun could change his mind.

Heavy wooden vats steamed in the cold air, their contents swirling with Quaraun’s signature shades of pink and puce.

The yarn skeins, freshly spun from GhoulSpawn’s week-long sheep shearing, hung on wooden rods suspended above the vats, dripping as they absorbed the vibrant hues.

Hours slipped by and soon, racks of variegated pink and puce ombre yarns were hanging all over The Blue Monkey’s deck.

Quaraun stood near the edge of the largest vat, his cane propped awkwardly against a nearby barrel. The handmaids fluttered about him, delicately dipping the skeins and wringing excess dye from the wool. His silver tentacle hair gleamed in the pale light, shimmering as he leaned over to inspect the dye consistency.

"I want an even gradient," Quaraun instructed, his voice soft but firm. "The transition between pink and puce must be seamless. No blotches."

"Yes, Milord," one of the handmaids assured him, carefully lifting a skein for inspection.

Despite his usual obsession with perfection, Quaraun's attention wavered. He pressed a hand to his rounded belly, frowning. This pregnancy had been harder than previous ones. His body ached constantly, and his lame leg bore the added strain poorly.

Twins, he suspected.

Again.

Most Elves bore twins, and Quaraun had done so many times before. But this time felt different.

One of the babies had become increasingly active over the past few days, kicking with relentless wild untamed energy. The other, however, had grown disturbingly still.

"Master Quaraun, are you well?" a handmaid asked, noticing his distracted expression.

"I am fine," Quaraun said, though his voice lacked conviction. "I just… Carrying twins is simply exhausting. Something… something’s wrong. I can not feel one of the babies anymore, and the other one has gone wild. It… hurts — "

The words had barely left his mouth when a sharp, searing pain knifed through his abdomen. Quaraun gasped, doubling over as the world tilted violently around him. His cane clattered to the deck.

"Master Quaraun!" the handmaid shrieked, dropping the skein she held.

Quaraun clutched at his belly, panic rising in his throat.

"Something is wrong... the babies..."

His voice faltered, breathless and strained.

Another wave of pain struck, more intense than the last. His vision blurred, dark spots dancing at the edges. The deck seemed to sway beneath him, though he knew it was not the river’s doing.

"Help him!" one of the handmaids cried, catching Quaraun as his knees buckled.

The necromancer’s frail body sagged against her. His breathing was shallow, and his already pale albino skin had gone deathly pale. The handmaids fluttered around him in a flurry of panic, their delicate hands trembling as they tried to keep him upright.

"Get him inside!" one commanded.

But before they could move him, Quaraun’s eyes rolled back, and he went limp in their arms.

"Master Quaraun!"

"He's fainted!"

"Get the King!"

One of the handmaids, her silken skirts flaring as she dashed across the deck, ran screaming toward the ship’s interior. Her voice echoed through the corridors, shrill with desperation.

"Your Majesty! King Gwallmaiic! Come quickly! Master Quaraun needs you!"

BoomFuzzy and GhoulSpawn were in the ballroom, a roaring fire crackling in the strange makeshift hearth they had added to the riverboat, as they sat cross-legged on the polished floor. A group of Goblins gathered around them, betting on the outcome of a spirited game of dice.

"Double sixes, and I win," GhoulSpawn declared confidently, shaking the dice in his cupped hands.

"Ya've got no luck, Goat," BoomFuzzy teased, his thick Scottish accent laced with amusement.

"I'm a Sheep, not a goat," GhoulSpawn muttered, rolling the dice with a flourish.

The Goblins erupted in cheers and jeers as the dice landed.

BoomFuzzy laughed, scooping up the winnings.

"Told ye, Goat, luck's nae yer friend."

Before GhoulSpawn could retort, the handmaid burst into the room, her face pale and frantic.

"Your Majesty!" she gasped, breathless. "Master Quaraun has collapsed! He needs you now!"

BoomFuzzy shot to his feet, the playful light in his eyes vanishing.

"What happened?"

"He said something was wrong with the babies, then fainted!"

GhoulSpawn’s golden eyes widened.

"Where is he?"

"On the deck by the dye vats!"

Without another word, BoomFuzzy and GhoulSpawn bolted from the ballroom, their boots and hooves thudding against the floorboards as they sprinted toward Quaraun. The Goblins, sensing the gravity of the situation, fell silent, watching their King and the Sheep Demon vanish through the doorway.

…

Quaraun lay motionless in his nest of fur pelts, the soft, luxurious furs piled high around him like a protective cocoon. His breathing was slow and shallow, his normally flushed face pale and damp with sweat. The gentle rise and fall of his chest was the only sign of life as he rested after the ordeal on deck.

“Is he… okay?” GhoulSpawn asked.

BoomFuzzy hovered nearby, his thick brows furrowed in deep concern. He paced back and forth, the tails of his purple tartan kilt swishing with each sharp turn. His calloused hands clenched and unclenched, as though he could squeeze the worry from the air around him.

GhoulSpawn stood awkwardly to the side, his green velvet coat draping heavily over his lanky frame. His golden eyes flicked between BoomFuzzy and the unconscious Quaraun, his confusion growing by the second.

"He'll be fine, right?" GhoulSpawn asked, his voice uncertain. "I mean, pregnancies are rough sometimes, aren't they?"

BoomFuzzy shot him a sharp glance, his usually jovial expression grim.

"Ya dinnae ken what ya're talkin' about, Goat," he muttered, reverting to the nickname he used when frustrated.

"I'm a Sheep," GhoulSpawn corrected automatically, though his heart wasn't in it. "Women back home had complications all the time, but they usually pulled through. Worst case, maybe one baby doesn’t make it. Sad, yeah, but not life-threatening to Quaraun is it?"

“Did ya not listen to anything I told ya this mornin’?” BoomFuzzy stopped pacing and fixed GhoulSpawn with a hard stare. "This ain't yer 1970s America, Ghouly," he said darkly. "This is the 40th bloody century, in a world teemin' wi' death an' rot, over run by fucking zombies."

GhoulSpawn blinked, trying to process the intensity of BoomFuzzy’s words.

"Okay... but it’s just a pregnancy complication, right? Quaraun will rest, recover, and—"

BoomFuzzy cut him off with a sharp wave of his hand.

"Nae, lad. One o' the wee bairns has likely passed already. We knew it might. That’s what Quaraun’s been worrying about the last few weeks. Ghouly it why we left the BioDome, remember? Our midwife died last year, we ain’t got one now. The whole reason we are on this boat, is to travel off our normal trade route in search of towns and settlements we ain’t yet been to, in the hopes of finding a midwife." His voice was thick with sorrow. "And we been searching for months now and we ain’t found one yet. Quaraun’s a few weeks from giving birth. The handmaids can deal with the labour, they done it before. But there ain’t one handmaid among them who’s ever dealt with a still born zombie bairn birth. Which is what it been looking like we were up against. Fetus as weak as this one been, unlikely to live to labour, we knew that. We just needed a midwife before it happened. And it looks like one bairn just died and the other freaked out over it. An' if that’s true, we got a serious problem."

GhoulSpawn frowned.

"I get that it's sad, but I don't see why you're acting like it's the end of the world."

BoomFuzzy's eyes gleamed with an eerie light as he stepped closer, lowering his voice to a grim whisper.

"When somethin' dies here, it don’t stay dead. Ghouly, do ya not listen to me? You brain still stuck in the 1970s. Ya ain’t back there no more. You here in our time now, and we got zombies."

GhoulSpawn stiffened, a cold shiver running down his spine.

"What are you saying?"

BoomFuzzy's voice was heavy with grim certainty.

"If one o' the bairns is dead inside him, it'll rise again. An' when it does, it'll be hungry."

"Hungry?" GhoulSpawn echoed, his brows furrowing. "For what?"

“Yar so damned dense, ya know that?” BoomFuzzy's gaze was unyielding. "Flesh."

GhoulSpawn's mouth went dry.

"You're talking about zombies? You mean one of the babies inside Quaraun is a zombie?"

"Aye," BoomFuzzy confirmed, his tone grim. "An’ nae the slow, shufflin' kind yer thinkin' of. These ones come out screamin', strong as bulls, an’ damn near impossible tae stop. If that wee bairn wakes up inside Quaraun..." He trailed off, the implications too horrifying to finish.

GhoulSpawn's stomach churned.

"You're saying... it could hurt him? The other baby?"

"Hurt him?" BoomFuzzy snorted bitterly. "It'll tear its way outta him, rip him apart from the inside. An’ if it gets loose on this ship, it'll go after everyone on board. You, the handmaids, the other wee ones. It’ll kill every one on this ship."

GhoulSpawn's mind reeled, struggling to reconcile the surreal horror of what he was hearing.

"This can’t be real," he muttered. "Zombies from a stillborn baby? That’s—"

"Ya think I’m makin' this up?" BoomFuzzy’s voice was sharp with anger. "Ya've seen the frozen wastelands we travel through. Ya've seen the hordes wanderin' out there, lookin' for anythin' warm tae sink their teeth into. Ya ken nae the cause of it, but I do. Magic an’ death dinnae mix well in this world, Ghouly. An’ Quaraun’s magic is strong. Too strong. If death touches him, it twists it into somethin' foul. This ain’t no normal pregnant woman we got, here, this a necromancer. A natural born necromancer. UnDead swarm to him. UnDead go in frenzies around him. What ya think an UnDead inside of him gonna do?"

GhoulSpawn swallowed hard, his hands trembling.

"What do we do?"

"We wait," BoomFuzzy said grimly. "An’ pray tae the gods he dunnae lose that second bairn. If he does..." His voice dropped to a whisper. "Then we’ll have two Mylings to deal with.”

“Mylings? What’s a Myling?”

“UnDead stillborn babies that turned into monsters in the womb.”

“How do we know what’s in him?”

“We wait and kill whatever comes out that ain’t alive."

Silence hung heavy between them, broken only by the crackle of the hearth and the soft rustle of Quaraun’s breathing. GhoulSpawn’s mind raced, the weight of this new reality crashing down on him.

He wasn’t in the 1970s anymore. And this was a world where death was just the beginning of something far worse.

BoomFuzzy sighed heavily and dropped into a crouch beside Quaraun’s nest. He adjusted the furs around the fragile Elf, brushing silver hair made of shimmering jellyfish tentacles from his pale face.

"Poor wee thing," he murmured, his voice soft with affection but laced with deep concern.

GhoulSpawn shifted uneasily.

"So, this has happened before?" he asked, the weight of BoomFuzzy's earlier words still sinking in. “You said it happened before? That means you know what to do, right?”

"Aye," BoomFuzzy confirmed, his tone grim. "An’ it nearly killed him."

GhoulSpawn blinked, struggling to reconcile this revelation with the regal, eccentric Necromancer who wielded power like a god.

"What do you mean?"

BoomFuzzy sat back on his heels, his expression darkening.

"He had a stillbirth years ago. It was bad. Real bad." He rubbed a hand over his beard, as if trying to scrub away the memory. "The babe came out dead, or so we thought. But death ain’t ever simple in this cursed world. The bairn came back, twisted, hungry, screamin’ for flesh."

GhoulSpawn’s stomach churned.

"What happened?"

BoomFuzzy's voice dropped to a near whisper.

"It tore through the camp before we could stop it. Nearly ripped Quaraun apart. Took half me Goblins tae put the thing down. By the time we were done, Quaraun was half-dead, an’ the group... well, we lost a lotta folk that day."

GhoulSpawn's brows knitted together.

"You had a larger group?"

"Aye. We used tae be a right proper caravan. Hundreds of Faeries, Goblins, Kelpies, an’ more bairns than ya could count." BoomFuzzy’s voice grew heavy with sorrow. "But sickness came through. Folk got weak, then they died. An’ then... they didn’t stay dead."

GhoulSpawn's breath hitched.

"Zombies."

BoomFuzzy nodded grimly.

"Quaraun’s magic’s powerful, but it’s a double-edged blade. Death twists when it gets near him. Turns folk into monsters. We lost nearly everyone before we got outta that mess."

GhoulSpawn stared at Quaraun, his heart aching for the fragile Elf who now seemed even more delicate in the aftermath of BoomFuzzy's story.

"I didn't know he went through all that."

BoomFuzzy's gaze softened.

"There’s a lot ye dinnae ken, lad. Quaraun dunnae like talkin' about painful memories. Keeps 'em locked away, deep inside. But that mess scarred him somethin' fierce. He loves his bairns more than anythin', an' losin' them... it near broke his mind."

GhoulSpawn swallowed hard, guilt prickling at him.

"That’s why he’s so obsessed with cleanliness, isn’t it? Germs cause sickness. Sickness causes death. Death causes zombies. And why he’s always fussing over the kids."

"Aye," BoomFuzzy confirmed. "He's terrified o’ germs gettin' to the wee ones, scared it’ll all happen again. An’ I cannae blame him. I’ve never seen anyone come back from a breakdown like that, but Quaraun did. Barely, but he did."

GhoulSpawn's voice was quiet.

"I didn't know."

BoomFuzzy placed a heavy hand on GhoulSpawn’s shoulder.

"Now ye do, lad. But listen close: if one o' them bairns is gone, we gotta move fast. We cannae let it rise. Not again. Wee UnDead fetus, moves fast as lightening."

GhoulSpawn nodded, a steely determination settling over him.

"I’ll do whatever it takes."

BoomFuzzy’s lips quirked into a grim smile.

"Good lad. Just remember — it ain’t just about protectin' Quaraun. If somethin' goes wrong, we’re all in danger."

GhoulSpawn's gaze flicked back to Quaraun, the weight of responsibility settling heavily on his shoulders.

"I get it," he said quietly. "We won’t let it happen again."

BoomFuzzy's grip tightened briefly before he stood.

"Good. Now let's keep watch over him. He’s gonna need us when he wakes up."

Together, they settled into a tense silence, the crackle of the hearth the only sound in the room. The past hung heavy in the air, but both knew the future could hold even darker dangers. And they were determined to face them head-on, for Quaraun’s sake — and their own.The End?

The Pink Necromancer, Moon Elf silk weaver & merchant: Quaraun on Noodle Beach. His master chef Phooka turned Lich husband: BoomFuzzy with his 1968 VW Bus Beach Noodle Food Truck. And their on again/off again mad scientist Sheep Demon lover: GhoulSpawn with his 1974 AMC Gremlin time machine. Time Travel setting swings back and forth between 40th century Maine after a comet hit the moon decimating the planet, and the 1970s, Maine. Quaraun in the main character, he and BoomFuzzy are a married gay couple. GhoulSpawn is their shared live-in lover. Art by Wendy Christine Allen.

BoomFuzzy King Gwallmaiic aka BoomFuzzy the Unicorn: Quaraun's husband, BoomFuzzy aka King Gwallmaiic, a Scottish Phooka, who is King of The UnSeelie Court. Quaraun is his court mage and advisor, as well as the only Elf in The UnSeelie Court. BoomFuzzy is a "classic fantasy type" Necromancer who uses sorcery to raise the dead. Being a Faerie he is also an illusionist and master of trickster magic. By profession, he is a Master Chef, owning the global monopoly on restaurants, taverns, pubs, and food trucks. Until his death, BoomFuzzy was regarded as the world's most powerful wizard. He is now a Lich. BoomFuzzy is also half-Human. His mother was a Mongolian/Chinese Human, which is why he wears distinctively Asian outfits, along with a great kilt worn as a cape. Known as BoomFuzzy the Unicorn, he often takes the form of a purple Unicorn. BoomFuzzy's exact age is unknown, though he was well over two thousand years old at the time of his death, and Quaraun resurrected him as a Lich around 500+ years ago, making him close to 3,000 years old. In his BlackBird form he is fifteen thousand years old. Art by Wendy Christine Allen

Quaraun Quaraun the Insane aka The Pink Necromancer: The F2M transgender Persian Moon Elf main character: The Pink Necromancer, Quaraun The Insane, with BoomFuzzy the Unicorn. F2M for those unaware = Quaraun was biologically born female, but transitioned to live as a male; this is why there are stories where Quaraun is sometimes pregnant, in spite of being male and using he/him male pronouns. Quaraun is a Necromancer by the actual dictionary definition of the word, meaning he is a psychic medium who sees and hears ghosts, and uses tarot, spirit boards, and seances to communicate with the dead. By profession he is a silk weaver/tailor/silk merchant. Quaraun is an Elder God JellyFish who takes the form of an Elf to blend in with society. His 12 foot long hair is made out of venomous, stinging jellyfish tentacles. Quaraun is BoomFuzzy's apprentice and regarded as the world's most powerful still living wizard. Quaraun's exact age is unknown, but he is somewhere around 750 years old. In his SunTa form he is twelve thousand years old. The Scared Pink JellyFish that lives in him, is stated to being over two million years old. Art by Wendy Christine Allen

Main characters: The Pink Necromancer, Quaraun (A Moon Elf) and his husband King Gwallmaiic aka BoomFuzzy aka The Elf Eater of Pepper Valley, Lich King of Fire Mountain (A Phooka/Faerie).

BoomFuzzy is King of The UnSeelie Court;

Quaraun is his Court Mage;

GhoulSpawn (not pictured) is Quaraun’s apprentice.

They are the world’s three most evil super villains, though they do not see themselves as evil. They own the world’s only functioning BioDome and thus hold the world’s monopoly on crops, food, livestock, and fabric, holding the Human population at their sadistic mercy.

These stories are told from their point of view.

 — — Art by Wendy Christine Allen

Meet The Characters

Books By Wendy Christine Allen
Currently Available on Amazon Kindle: