Update: April 16, 2022

Tomorrow is Easter.

Easter, like Christmas, Thanksgiving, and Mother's day is one of the worst days of the year. A day that celebrates children and motherhood. On November 14, 2013, while I was 8 month pregnant, and putting bags on the back seat of my car, three still unidentified attackers, brought golf clubs down on my back, breaking my spine and murdering my baby. I am legally blind and almost deaf, so I neither heard nor saw them coming. I read lips, so you must be facing me for me to hear you. Bring legally blind, you also must be less than 3 feet in front of me for me to see your lips, to know you are talking. Because of this it was very easy for them to sneak up behind me while I leaned into my car, putting bags on the seat.

They broke 3 vertebrae in my spine, the shattered bones severing my spinal column, permanently damaging many nerves. Because of this nerve damage I have limited use of my left arm and hand, difficulty breathing, my bladder and intestines no longer function properly requiring adult diapers, massive tremors in both hands prevent me from being able to do basic things like brush my hair or hold a spoon to eat. These are just things from the nerve damage. 

Additionally they broke my pelvis, my hips, and my knees.

I was paralyzed for 5 months. It took me 18 months to relearn to walk. Today I can walk on a very limited basis, aided by a cane, but every step is seeking pain, like lightning bolts going through my leg, across my pelvis and up my spine.

Because of this I was bedridden from 2013 to 2015. And all of that time I had no use of my hands, so I was not online either. And thus was unaware that during that time, a group of locals set to social media to build up massive slanderous rumors about me. They created a huge fairy tale meme of me being an Erotica author, a porn star, a transvestite, a male to female transgender, gay, and an alien abductee. I am none of those things but they spent 3 years, on hundreds of accounts on Facebook and Twitter, many of them fake "Eelkat" accounts where they were pretending to be me, building up this massive slanderous web of lies about me, and I had no idea they were doing it, until October 2021, 9 years after they started doing it.

April 10, 2015 a group of 74 locals, many of them wearing ku klux klan white hooded robes, arrived at my farm. 14 of them held me, Ben, my mother, and one of my 3 younger brothers down on the ice and snow while holding guns to our heads, while the others used cinder block bricks and a metal pole device with wire loops on the end, to beat and behead, 10 of my 12 foster children, then nail their heads to my door. The youngest was 4 years old. The oldest was 16 years old. They chanted "too gay for the family friendly town of old Orchard Beach" while accusing me, my pink Volvo, my pink motor home, and Ben of being gay, transgender, transvestite, and citing that guys were not allowed in Maine.

THIS is what gay haters in Maine do to people they THINK, might maybe, be gay, even though they are not.

No man, woman or child is safe in Maine, so long as these murders walk free. They will kill anything they determine to be gay, even if it is not, as can be seen my the murder of my children.

They also had hundreds of paperback copies of my books, burning them in a huge bonfire on my lawn while calling them gay Erotica and calling mean Erotica author and porn star. (I'm an author, I write a travel blog style series about a homeless man who backpacks his way across Maine, there is no sex in the series. I'm a Mormon, I've never written a sex scene.)

My family was murdered and I am crippled for the rest of my life, because of this group who has been slandering me on social media. But, at the time of these two attacks (November 14, 2013 and April 10,2015) me and my family were unaware of these slanderous rumors the locals of Old Orchard Beach and Biddeford, Maine were spreading not only on Facebook and Twitter, but by word of mouth around town as well.

May 2021, I started walking around town again, for the first time since being paralyzed 9 years ago on November 14, 2013, and it quickly became apparent something was seriously wrong with the locals.

I was unable to walk my dog on Main Street, Bradbury Street, Harvey Street, or Cutts Street Biddeford, where I have lived since becoming paralyzed, but not before gone outside, because of being paralyzed and bedridden and unable to walk until now…

I was unable to walk my dog on Main Street, Bradbury Street, Harvey Street, or Cutts Street Biddeford without being attacked, pushed off the sidewalk by random strangers running up to me and grabbing my cane and using it to push me in the road in front of cars while accusing me of being gay, transgender, or transvestite. Screaming "transvestite freak" while throwing rocks at me. Group of women joggers stopping to surround me and harass me while saying guys aren't allowed on their street. 

October 2021, my Volvo returned to my driveway after 3 years of being completely rebuilt, after the February 2019 attack on it with baseball bats completely destroyed it. Within 5 minutes of starting to repaint it, 2 men showed up in my driveway yelling about aliens and demons and Etoile and because of this I stopped painting fish on the door, painted over the fish and painted a portrait of Etiole instead. 

November 19, 2021 the red haired American woman from the 2016 High Street attack on my navy blue pick up truck, showed up on the porch here on Main Street. 

The location is 409 Main Street, the big white farmhouse Victorian on the 3way corner of Harvey Lane and Cutts street, right at the train tracks. It has 2 driveways one on Main Street and one on Harvey. There are multiple porches. It's the porch on the Main street side, that goes up the driveway alongside the abortive cedar tree hedge, where I park my painted Volvo. That porch is the one this woman shows up on. 

It's an elderly couple and mother in law who live there at that porch.  When they leave for work, this woman shows up when they are not home and stands on the porch bellowing like a fog horn screaming death threats at me, yelling crazy demon and alien slander about Etiole, making the claim of putting a bomb in the tail pipe of my car, screaming about suicide demons and evil eye curses, and yelling about someone named Todd Murphy (I don't know who that is, I get the impression he's a relative or boyfriend or ex of hers or something, but I don't any one by that name, so I don't know who he is. I don't know who she is either.) She looks to be maybe 30s to 40s aged. 

She was here again yesterday. She was bragging that she got a fight started with my mother and the Atwaters on Facebook, laughing about how easy it is to get my mother and her ex fighting and the old woman was giving her hell and telling her to get off the Atwaters Facebook and leave them alone. 

This happened less then an hour after my mother made the claim that a woman of the same short haired blond description, assaulted her and my father at an ATM machine, the blond woman claiming to my mother to be my father's girlfriend, my father claiming he never saw her before. 

All this happened on April 10, 2022, the 7 year anniversary of the murder of my foster children, and the blond woman who was here in my driveway after the ATM attack was bragging the anniversary is why she is instigating the fighting between my parents. 

I did not see the ATM attack, so, I do not know what happened other then what my mother and father are saying. 

I did however see her here in my driveway.

She does not live here. She's shows up in a silver pick-up truck driven by a small skinny blonde man. No one here at this building knows who she is.

There is another blonde woman, older sometimes with her. I do recognize the older woman. She's one of the November 14, 2013 golf club attackers. The one the others who were with her called "Claire". She looks to be in her 60s. Usually wears a blue denim button down man's worksheet as a coat. She sometimes drives a gold Volvo suv around 2004vintage, sometimes a silver Subaru suv, sometimes a mega sized white Nissan 4 door white pick-up truck, and sometimes a pine dark green pick up truck. She frequently has another older woman with her, who calls herself "Kendra" and has very, very long natural red curly hair, sometimes she wears big Janis Joplin glasses and sometimes cyberpunk cyclops lime green glasses, she frequently carries a small white poodle dog. The dog is often wearing either a purple dragon or a black skeleton costume. These 2 older women and a younger bald man are the 2013 golf club attackers who murdered my baby. This new younger blond woman and the 5 who are often with her, appear to be their relatives. The FBI believes they are part of a drug gang from Connecticut that call themselves "The Cyr Clan". According to the FBI the Cyr Clan was a gang that my uncle Bruce was involved with back in the 1960s in Boston before I was born. The FBI believes Bruce pissed them off in the early 2000s and that's what brought them up here to Maine.

The FBI believes they were after either one of Bruce's daughters or one of Bruce's sisters with both the November 2013 and April 2015 attacks.

One of Bruce's daughters also lives on Portland Ave in Old Orchard Beach and she also has a pink motor home. So there are TWO pink motor homes on the same street. This particular daughter of Bruce IS in fact a porn star. She's a pole dancer for a top less bar.

In 2016, there was another large scale attack, near duplicate to the April 10, 2015 attack. I never talk about it because it didn't happen to me. It happened to Bruce's daughter across the street from me. The attack on her family was bigger, bolder, and bloodier, than the attack on my family the previous year.

In 2017, a third similar attack happened in Biddeford to one of Bruce's sisters. Again I don't talk about it because it didn't happen to me.

Like I've said before there is A LOT MORE going on, then what you hear me talking about. I don't talk about what has happened to several of my cousins and their families both the Atwater cousins and the Murphey cousins- because it is not my place to do so. That's why you ONLY hear me talking about what directly happened to me personally and never mentioning the rest.

And I've not said everything that happened to me. A lot more has happened to me then you hear about because the FBI has specifically requested I don't talk about specific aspects of what happened to me and my children, because a lot was never released to the public, because they want to see who knows what. Certain things no one in the public should know about and knowing those things marks you as involved. This new young blonde woman KNOWS several of those things that were not released to the public and yells those things. Which means she is VERY INVOLVED with the murder of my children. 

Like I said until summer and fall of 2021 when started walking again for the first time in 9 years, I was unaware of the local gossip that was falsely accusing me of being gay, falsely accusing me of being transgender, falsely accusing me of being transvestite, falsely accusing me of being a porn star, falsely accusing me of being an Erotica author, or falsely accusing me of being an alien abduttee. 

I have lived here since 1975. You people know me. You people knew my murdered children. You people know I'm a cis female. You people know I'm not gay. I have published 138 novels and more then 2,000 short stories since 1978, and I  have sold 27k copies of every one of them to you people who come to my house and buy them in person, so you've read my books and know they are not Erotica. You people know I've been a devoted orthodox LDS Mormon my whole life, and that I've been with Ben for 37 years, so you know I'm not a porn star. 

What is wrong with you people? My family was murdered and I have spent 9 years recovering from medical hell, and I go outside for the first time in 9 years and find you people who know me have all devolved into gay hating, sex spewing, gibberish slandering gossips spreading vile, evil, malicious rumors and lies that you yourselves know to be untrue?

No wonder not a single one of you have helped my family through any of this. No wonder not a one of you ever once visited me at the hospital or my home after I got out of the hospital and couldn't go outside because I couldn't walk. 

You don't see me for 9 years because I'm bedridden and you're all to cold hearted to stop by and check in on me, and you spend that 9 years spinning wild, crazy transphobic, gay hating, sex filled lies about me?

What is wrong with you people?

You all let some stranger, who very likely IS the murderer, convince you of crazy ass slandering lies, that you people know to be untrue. 

You all ought to be ashamed of yourselves. 

Every resident of Old Orchard Beach and Biddeford, Maine,  you all ought to be ashamed of what you have spent the last 9 years doing.

This new younger blonde woman, she's the one who keeps saying my car has a suicide demon in it and yelling about Todd, saying my car caused him to die.

I don't know who she is, but she's the same one who used to show up at 27 High st, also Biddeford and scream "nasty bitch" at me and acuse me of being an Erotica author and porn star. (Which she did during several Witcher 3 livestreams on Twitch, you can see her doing it if you go back and watch my VOD). I am neither an Erotica author or a Porn star, and she had throughout 2016 to 2019 arrived at High st with 5 others, one a blond man with a silver pick-up truck, one a black man with a yellow Mitsubishi with new York plates, one a very obese woman with blond Shirley Temple sausage curls, and the other two hooded men with a navy blue Buick sedan. If you remember the Christmas Eve 2016 livestream when the gang attacked my high st apartment and screaming "transvestite freak" that's them. This that same woman who also slanders me by calling me transvestite and transgender, which I am neither. I am a cis female, I've had 7 miscarriages, and the 1 baby that made it full term was murdered November 14, 2013 by 3 people with golf clubs, who are suspected to be, these same people. 

One day when I went downstairs to get the mail on high st, a mailbox that was in the lobby and you had to go through 2 sets of doors and foyers to get to, she had her hand in the mailbox and when I came out the door she yelled "I wasn't stealing your mail" threw our mail on the ground and ran off.

She knows the Martals, (Aunt Barbara ex, uncle Paul Martal,  the one in prison for building the Boston Marathon bomb in 2013, Mike's father, those Martals) she was staying with them for a few months in 2016. Is somehow connected to Barbara (the one who wrote all those emails in 1997 pretending to be me, when I did not yet have email or internet or a computer at the time, and I had not yet heard of email and didn't even know what email was, back when Barbara wrote all those alien abduction emails about Etiole and pretending I wrote them.)

She has short straight blond hair and sometimes dyes it dark red or purple. I know she follows both me and my mom and most of the Atwaters and my 3 younger brothers (though not my 2 older brothers as the oldest is in prison and the 2nd oldest is dead) on Facebook because she keeps saying that "I read on Facebook…" when she's in my driveway.

She shows up at Walmart to yell at me sometimes, and sometimes shows up while I'm walking Mickey. She talks about Etiole and White Monkey a lot when yelling, which is strange because that's stuff Brucie and Daddy used to write in their letters to Bishop Morgan back in Cape Elizabeth in 1990s. 

I'm not the one who calls him Etiole that's always been Bruce and Barbara who did that. I know his real name and use his real name.. They don't know his real name. And my father is only one who uses the term White Monkey. The white monkey was Helen Pearlys pet back in 1970s, it had nothing to do with Etoile, I don't know why he keeps saying it does.. My father is the only one who ever makes that connection. I've never called Etiole a demon or alien, again that has always been my father, Barbara and Brucie who said the alien and demon stuff. I don't believe in aliens or demons, but they do. (Etiole if you don't know is a local elderly homeless man who has backpacked around New England since 1953, and since 1978 I let him camp on my farm in Old Orchard Beach when he's in the area. He's covered with scars from WW2 and they call him an alien and demon because of his scars. They refuse to believe he is a human, which just goes to show how absolutely stupid they are.)

In November an elderly man came over and started asking me why I was emailing him about Etiole and I'm not, I don't use email. He said he was getting over 300 emails a day about Etiole all claiming to be from me. He said there are hundreds of email addresses getting copies of this email. You remember when Barbara and Brucie used to send emails back in 1997 claiming they were from me but we didn't have computer or internet back then? I think it might be Barbara sending those emails again like she did back then. I can't think of who else could be doing it.

This sometimes blond, sometimes red hair, sometimes purple hair woman, also mentions these emails when she is in my driveway yelling at my Volvo at 409 Main street. 

FBI agent Andy Drewer has found and shut down, so far 27 Facebook accounts, all pretending to be me. He said all of them were owed by Brucie. These fake "Eelkat" accounts appear to be the source of a lot of what this blond woman says and is suspected that she may be one of the people behind writing them.

Keep in mind, Brucie is dead. He may have started those Facebook accounts, but he ain't the one writing them. He died 3years ago.

Mervin Bruce Atwater died from Covid19 on November 24, 2019.

The fact remains you ARE impeding an FBI investigation into the murder of my family, and only someone involved would have any reason to do that. ONLY someone connected to the murderer would have a motive to try to stop the FBIs investigation. That makes you an accessory to murder. You make yourself look VERY GUILTY of being involved every time you spread slanders about me, my car, or Etiole. 

Do consider that the source of your slander in all likelihood is the murderer, please tell FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322 at the Portland FBI office on Middle street, the name of the person who is telling you to slander me.

And now tomorrow is Easter. 

A day when mothers take their children on Easter egg hunts.

My children are dead.

My children were murdered. 

And you people have spent the last 9 years making fun of that.

Think about THAT tomorrow when you are out on Easter egg hunts with your babies.

Think about how YOU would feel if it was YOU. How would YOU feel if it had been your baby who was murdered and this entire town was spreading bullying slanderous lies about YOU.

If you know who this blond woman is, please tell FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322 at the Portland FBI office on Middle street. She is wanted for questioning about her connection to the November 14, 2013 murder of my baby and attempted murder of me, and the April 10, 2015 murder of my foster children and the September 26, 2016 hit and run attack on my car and the February 2019 vandalism to 27 High st apartment building, and the November 2021 attack on my Volvo and the March 10, 2022 attack on my Volvo and the April 10, 2022 ATM attack on my parents. 



Update April 11, 2022: Do you know who this woman is?

This woman that my mother is talking about, have any of you ever seen her? Does anyone know who she is?

It isn't that woman who keeps coming on the porch and yelling at my car is it? Do any of you know who the woman attacking my car is?

The location is 409 Main Street, the big white farmhouse Victorian on the 3way corner of Harvey Lane and Cutts street, right at the train tracks. It has 2 driveways one on Main Street and one on Harvey. There are multiple porches. It's the porch on the Main street side, that goes up the driveway alongside the abortive cedar tree hedge, where I park my painted Volvo. That porch is the one this woman shows up on. 

It's an elderly couple and mother in law who live there at that porch.  When they leave for work, this woman shows up when they are not home and stands on the porch bellowing like a fog horn screaming death threats at me, yelling crazy demon and alien slander about Etiole, making the claim of putting a bomb in the tail pipe of my car, screaming about suicide demons and evil eye curses, and yelling about someone named Todd Murphy (I don't know who that is, I get the impression he's a relative or boyfriend or ex of hers or something, but I don't any one by that name, so I don't know who he is. I don't know who she is either.) She looks to be maybe 30s to 40s aged. 

She was here again yesterday. She was bragging that she got a fight started with my mother and the Atwaters on Facebook, laughing about how easy it is to get my mother and her ex fighting and the old woman was giving her hell and telling her to get off the Atwaters Facebook and leave them alone. 

This happened less then an hour after my mother made the claim that a woman of the same short haired blond description, assaulted her and my father at an ATM machine, the blond woman claiming to my mother to be my father's girlfriend, my father claiming he never saw her before. 

All this happened on April 10, 2022, the 7 year anniversary of the murder of my foster children, and the blond woman who was here in my driveway after the ATM attack was bragging the anniversary is why she is instigating the fighting between my parents. 

I did not see the ATM attack, so, I do not know what happened other then what my mother and father are saying. 

I did however see her here in my driveway.

She's the one who keeps saying my car has a suicide demon in it and yelling about Todd, saying my car caused him to die.

I don't know who she is, but she's the same one who used to show up at 27 High st, also Biddeford and scream "nasty bitch" at me and accuses me of being an Erotica author and porn star. (Which she did during several Witcher 3 livestreams on Twitch, you can see her doing it if you go back and watch my VOD). I am neither an Erotica author or a Porn star, and she had throughout 2016 to 2019 arrived at High st with 5 others, one a blond man with a silver pick-up truck, one a black man with a yellow Mitsubishi with new York plates, one a very obese woman with blond Shirley Temple sausage curls, and the other two hooded men with a navy blue Buick sedan. If you remember the Christmas Eve 2016 livestream when the gang attacked my high st apartment and screaming "transvestite freak" that's them. This that same woman who also slanders me by calling me transvestite and transgender, which I am neither. I am a cis female, I've had 7 miscarriages, and the 1 baby that made it full term was murdered November 14, 2013 by 3 people with golf clubs, who are suspected to be, these same people. 

One day when I went downstairs to get the mail on high st, a mailbox that was in the lobby and you had to go through 2 sets of doors and foyers to get to, she had her hand in the mailbox and when I came out the door she yelled "I wasn't stealing your mail" threw our mail on the ground and ran off.

She knows the Martals, (Barbara ex, uncle Paul Martal,  the one in prison for building the Boston Marathon bomb in 2013, Mike's father, those Martals) she was staying with them for a few months in 2016. Is somehow connected to Barbara (the one who wrote all those emails in 1997 pretending to be me, when I did not yet have email or internet or a computer at the time, and I had not yet heard of email and didn't even know what email was, back when Barbara wrote all those alien abduction emails about Etiole and pretending I wrote them.)

She has short straight blond hair and sometimes dyes it dark red or purple. I know she follows both me and my mom and most of the Atwaters and my 3 younger brothers (though not my 2 older brothers as the oldest is in prison and the 2nd oldest is dead) on Facebook because she keeps saying that "I read on Facebook…" when she's in my driveway.

She shows up at Walmart to yell at me sometimes, and sometimes shows up while I'm walking Mickey. She talks about Etiole and White Monkey a lot when yelling, which is strange because that's stuff Brucie and Daddy used to write in their letters to Bishop Morgan back in Cape Elizabeth in 1990s. 

I'm not the one who calls him Etiole that's always been Bruce and Barbara who did that. I know his real name and use his real name.. They don't know his real name. And my father is only one who uses the term White Monkey. The white monkey was Helen Pearlys pet back in 1970s, it had nothing to do with Etoile, I don't know why he keeps saying it does.. My father is the only one who ever makes that connection. I've never called Etiole a demon or alien, again that has always been my father, Barbara and Brucie who said the alien and demon stuff. I don't believe in aliens or demons, but they do.

(Etiole if you don't know is a local elderly homeless man who has backpacked around New England since 1953, and since 1978 I let him camp on my farm in Old Orchard Beach when he's in the area. He's covered with scars from WW2 and they call him an alien and demon because of his scars. They refuse to believe he is a human, which just goes to show how absolutely stupid they are.)

In November an elderly man came over and started asking me why I was emailing him about Etiole and I'm not, I don't use email. He said he was getting over 300 emails a day about Etiole all claiming to be from me. He said there are hundreds of email addresses getting copies of this email. You remember when Barbara and Brucie used to send emails back in 1997 claiming they were from me but we didn't have computer or internet back then? I think it might be Barbara sending those emails again like she did back then. I can't think of who else could be doing it.

This sometimes blond, sometimes red hair, sometimes purple hair woman, also mentions these emails when she is in my driveway yelling at my Volvo at 409 Main street. 

FBI agent Andy Drewer has found and shut down, so far 27 Facebook accounts, all pretending to be me. He said all of them were owed by Brucie. These fake "Eelkat" accounts appear to be the source of a lot of what this blond woman says and is suspected that she may be one of the people behind writing them.

Due to the incident yesterday it is now also believed that she is the mystery blond woman who pretends to be my father's girlfriend and harassed my mother for no reason other then to get a laugh on watching my mother fight with my father (something they do quite violently in public places, in stores, just everywhere.)

If you know who this blond woman is, please tell FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322 at the Portland FBI office on Middle street. She is wanted for questioning about her connection to the November 14, 2013 murder of my baby and attempted murder of me, and the April 10, 2015 murder of my foster children and the September 26, 2016 hit and run attack on my car and the February 2019 vandalism to 27 High st apartment building, and the November 2021 attack on my Volvo and the March 10, 2022 attack on my Volvo and the April 10, 2022 ATM attack on my parents. 



Update: April 10, 2022, big violent attack, as police and FBI expected.

Today is the 7th anniversary of the murder of my family. Remember I said to watch who does what today?... My father just beat the hell out of my mother, tried to kill her. She is right now refusing to call the police. My mother claims she caught my father with a girlfriend he's had for several years now. But near as I can tell, all he did was stop to tell some random stranger how to use the ATM machine. Note, they got divorced in 1994, my mother left my father for another man, left the other man for another man after that, and left the next man for Wayne. She's been with 2 other men (possibly more) since Wayne. She has not been a part of my father's life for 30 years, but feels the need to control his life and harass him on extreme violent levels. If he does have a girlfriend, so what? She left him 30 years ago.

Wayne died during the cat court case, the 2nd one, when he sued my mother for stealing his cats and putting them in my motorhome. Wayne's father, 8 of his cats, and then Wayne himself each died a few weeks apart all from rat poison. Wayne's daughter sued my mother claiming my mother put rat poison in their food.

The fbi believes my mother did kill Wayne and his cats and believes that's why she put his cats in my motorhome. Fbi believes my mother was one who called police April 10, 2015, expecting them to arrest me, take the motorhome, and return the cats to her. She did not expect police to take cats. All the harassment and vandalism of my mom's cars is believed by fbi to be Wayne's daughter friends and relatives and family.

My family, my children were murdered in 2 attacks, one on November 14, 2013 and one on April 10, 2015, both attacks are believed by the FBI to have been attacks that were intended on my mother and the people hired mixed me and her up.

April 10, is my mother's father's birthday by the way, David Henry Atwater, it's WHY she does everything she does, all her wild crazy vandalisms to people on April 10 every year since the 1950s.


April 6, 2022 update, as the attacks on my family and property continue and now more people are in the hospital

Daddy has sepsis and they keeping him in hospital for a few days.

Sepsis is very bad.

That's what I had.

You can die a few hours after it sets in if not treated.

When I was in the hospital in 2014.

That's why I was in the hospital.

I had surgery for it in march 2015.

That was the surgery on my arm.

Sepsis was in a major artery in left arm to heart. 

Side effect from when I was in hospital November 2013 when I was in wheelchair and February 2014 when I was on crutches relearning how to walk. Doctors was focused on my hip and not my spine. They didn't find the source of infection until until the mri in June 2016. 

Sepsis is why I can't walk without cane and why my lungs are messed up and why I have tremors and can't use my hands good anymore. Sepsis infection was so back it damaged my nerves. I was scheduled for spinal column surgery September 2016, they sent me to a neurosurgeon who was supposed to be top brain surgeon in New England and he did more mri and then canceled surgery because damage to my vertebrae (from golf club attack November 2013, which is what caused all of this, including the Sepsis and is the attack that brought the fbi here they think Mark wife did it but college had no security cameras at the bug light parking lot, they investigating Mark family, Barbara family,  and Brucie family. Charges of murdering my baby and attempted murder of me) is so bad. Shattered vertebrae bone fragments are severed into my spinal column nerve bundle at the sacroiliac joint where the hip and pelvis connect to spine. Neurosurgeon said he can't operate because of how nerve damage is, said if he removed bone fragments I would be paralyzed from neck down. But that is also when the source of Sepsis infection was found to be in my spine and not my hip, and that is when it finally went away because they were able to target the correct place to fix the infection.

Mark’s wife is the #1 suspect the FBI is watching, because, according to the FBI, this mysterious Mark guy, whom I have never met, never heard of prior to this, have never talked to, and have never seen, so I have no clue who he or his wife are… according to the FBI, he is friends with my mother, but only via her FaceBook account, where she hired him to put in a septic system, then gave him MY address in Old Orchard, while making the claim that SHE owned both MY land and MY motorhome, and when he asked for a picture of her so he would know who she was, she gave him a picture of ME, not herself.

According to FBI agent Andy Drewer THIS is the reason why the backhoe was driven over my house August 8, 2013 and why the golf club attackers attacked me on November 14, 2013.

According to the FBI, my mother was trying to get my land so she could sell it to use the money for a down payment on a house in Kennebunk and she used this Mark guy as her pawn to do it, by fighting with him on social media using “fake EelKat” accounts to convince him that he was dealing with me, even though I had never heard of him before.

According to the FBI, my mother started sending his family death threats, in the same way she is currently sending Todd Murphey’s family death threats, and that this is why Mark’s wife attacked with the golf clubs, murdering my baby and crippling my spine. According to the FBI, Mark’s wife thought she was attacking my mother and was unaware that both my mother, her sister Barbara, and her brother Bruce’s wife Doris were all impersonating me, using 27 different “fake EelKat” FaceBook accounts to scam Mark’s family about a septic system.

This was confirmed by the Old Orchard Beach police in October 2016, when Mark attacked my mother in person and was arrested by OOB police, that day. He made the claim, that she, my mother, was me, but the officers in question, Robin and Will, both know me and my mother and informed Mark that this was not me that he was fighting with, it was my mother, to which he said this was the woman he had been dealing with since June 2001 who had called herself EelKat in every correspondence. The police showed Mark pictures of me and he said he had never seen me before and had no clue who I was.

This event October 2016, is when both the police and FBI started expanding their investigation, now looking for people who were friends of my mother, her sister Barbara, and her brother Bruce, and that is when they found the identity of long time stalker and bomb builder Kendra Silvermander who turned out to be a FaceBook friend of all 3 of them.

After Mark’s gang found out October 2016 that I was NOT the person they had been fighting with online, but rather it had been my mother impersonating me, the attacks on my family stopped but the attacks on my mother’s family started February 2017 when a road grader drove 75 feet up her driveway and flattened her car. Since then this event was repeated with 3 more cars.

In August 2021, My mother and her sister began impersonating me on FaceBook and with emails, yet again, and as they had done in the past, used my friend Etiole to do it. Once again, calling him a demon and an alien and a cryptid, and once again pretending to be me, they wrote a lot of emails and started mass spam sending them to every Maine email address they could find, at a rate of sending them to several thousand people a day.

I found out about this in November 2021, after Etiole was shot, gunned down by 6 people at Rotary Park in Biddeford, Maine on November 21, 2021, by people who claimed to be from Scarborough, Maine and claimed to be the mother and in laws of some guy named Todd Murphey.

I still have no clue who Todd Murphey is, but apparently he used to work with my mother and commit suicide recently and my mother and her sister took advantage of his suicide to yet again pretend to be me, and this time, calling Etiole a suicide demon, started harassing this Todd guy’s ex wife, son, and mother on FaceBook and via emails while pretending to be me. Which caused these people to show up at my 409 Main Street/Harvey/Cutts street Biddeford apartment to vandalize my car and cut all the wires off the apartment building, not once, but twice: on Thanksgiving day 2021 and again on March 10, 2022, because these friends and family of this Todd guy are 100% convinced the nut they are dealing with on FaceBook is me, when in fact, the one they are dealing with is no me, but rather my mother yet again pretending to be me.

This is also what led to the December 2021 and January 2022 FBI raids in the Cutts Street are of Biddeford, just a few weeks ago, which led to the arrests of 8 people.

Back to sepsis…

On December 24, 2021, my mother arrived here at 409 Main street and stole my father’s 14 medications that he takes for his triple by pass, his kidney dialysis, his diabetes… and then, she took him in her car, drove to his doctor, and told his doctor, he’s not allowed to have medicine, because he has to do what she says.

He has not taken his medicine since December 24, 2021, it is today April 6, 2022, and he is struggling to stay alive.

All of this is because she is hell bent on a house in Kennebunk and doesn’t give a shit that she has caused my baby to be murdered November 14, 2013, my foster children to be murdered April 10, 2015, me to be going through a decade long medical nightmare after being crippled November 14, 2013, 5 of my cars to be destroyed including The real Cristine The World’s Most Haunted Car that Stephen King based his Cristine off of, my house -the one that was in the Thinner movie- to be driven over by a back hoe, and now my father dying in the hospital.

Death and destruction at every turn, and she doesn’t give a shit because, as she puts it: “What are we going to do about Wendy? She can’t keep that land, I need a house in Kennebunk!”

Her obsession with getting a house is utter ludicrous insanity, that needs to be stopped before anyone else dies at the hands of her fucking retarded FaceBook friends who blinding attack, vandalize, and beat up anyone and everyone on her command.

I am so fed up with her blind devotion to a fairy tale house she thinks she has to have, at the expense of the lives of everyone around her.



March 30, 2022, update on yet another attack on my family and land

Police take notice. 


Scam artists have been bringing real estate agents onto my property in attempt to illegally sell my land. They have no right or permission to be here. My land is NOT for sale. If you see them doing it, please arrest them.

These are the Scottish Travellers. They arrive here every summer, harassing my family for four decades now. They are the same ones who drove a backhoe over my house August 8, 2013. The same ones who crippled me and murdered my baby November 14, 2013 with golf clubs, leaveing me paralized with a broken spine ever since. I am cripled with a shattered spinal column since the golf club attack and am bedridden weeks to a time unable to sit up or get out of bed. I have rebuilt my house 5 times in the past 9 years, and their attempts to steal my land and sell it have been barbaric and violent, and icluded a bomb that blew up my house October 18, 2006, and most of my family is now dead, murdered at their hands. These are the same people who cut my 1964 Dodge 330 in half May 10, 2010. They arrived back here September 19, 2020 and illegally cut down most of the trees across my lawn, and arrived again November 19, 2021 and for the last 20 years they arrive every summer with a green dump truck and dump garbage on my lawn. In 2014 they left a pile of garbage 175 feet long, 30 feet wide and 12 feet tall and it cost me $12,000 to have it removed. I am crippled and elderly and there is no one to help me against their harassment.

There should NEVER be anyone other than me EelKat Wendy C Allen (with the painted Volvo) or my partner Benjamin Wildes (with the blue Honda) in my yard at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, where the ink motorhome is parked. If you see ANYONE ELSE or any other car in my yard, please call the police immediately. There is no one else who has permission to be on my land.

My land is NOT for sale, if you see real estate agents, please inform them they are being scammed and the people trying to sell my land are NOT the legal land owners.

The FBI are on the look out for them as are the local police. If you see them in my yard, please notify both the Old Orchard Beach Police Department at 207-934-4911 and FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322 at the Portland FBI office on Middle street.





March 10, 2022 update on the most recent vandalism of my car

This is a copy of the letter that has been forwarded to the police departments involved. For this online edition some parts have been removed (so if you get to a place that seems like the topic changed abruptly, that is why) and the names are removed from the online version, but the version the police have, includes all the full names and contact info of all the people in question. And for those who have asked: yes, the police and FBI have talked to Etiole, they are fully aware of him, his health, his homelessness, etc.

Dear Sirs,

I feel I need to tell you what has been happening as it has gotten very much out of control the past few weeks. It's been slowly escalating for a few years and, if you look at my police record for both Old Orchard Beach and Biddeford, you will see dozens of reports for vandalism of my 1992 Volvo 240 (the painted one) at now 3 apartments in Biddeford, and vandalism of my land in Old Orchard Beach. In the past 6 months, a hyper escalation started with has become very out of control the past couple of weeks.

Last night, my car was vandalized again.  

As these events are taking place in both Old Orchard Beach and Biddeford, I'm giving this same letter to both departments, so events from both towns are listed.

I am Wendy Christine Allen of 146 Portland Ave Old Orchard Beach, Maine and 409 Main Street apartment 101 Biddeford, Maine.

There appears to be someone fairly local impersonating me online, and is raising hell with a lot of local people, inciting them to do very violent physical attacks on me, my Biddeford apartment, my Old Orchard land, and my car.

It's reached the point where I can not go to the store without having my car towed home, because it gets vandalized so bad while I'm n the store shopping. EVERY TIME I go to the store. I've been at a loss to understand why this is happening. I don't know who these people are or why they are attacking. On Thanksgiving day they cut all the wires off the Biddeford apartment building so we had no internet or heat or anything for a while. There is a "redhaired" woman who shows up on the front porch to cream at my car, every time the family who lives in that apartment goes to work. She stopped a few weeks ago, because the man who lives there fell on the ice, broke his shoulder and has not gone to work since. It appears she knows that family who lives there and does not want them knowing she does this while they are not home.

A few weeks ago an old man walked up to me, asked if I was EelKat and then asked me why I kept emailing him, and I said I don't email anyone cause I don't use email. He said some days he gets over 300 emails a day from someone claiming to be EelKat.

 

We are Gypsies, and though I've lived in America my whole life, I know very little of American habits and laws or what specifically to do in this situation. We are the Gypsies who were in Stephen King's Thinner movie and my 146 Portland Ave land was one of the filming locations of the movie and, the cars in the opening scenes were our cars, one of which I still have. I mention this, because, there are two Gypsy clans, The Atwaters (Scottish Travellers) and the Cyrs (Irish Travellers) fighting over my land and the fight centres largely around the fact that it was the filming location of Stephen King's the Thinner movie.

I own the land. From the 1940s it was owned by my grandmother Helen Ricker Allen. She left it to me in her will in 1983. Unknown to me, at some point after 1983, the Atwaters had the land illegally transferred into their names -they steal land this way as a full time career and many of them have illegally deed swapped land in all 50 states in America.

In 2014, I found out they are done an illegal deed swap, when an auction group showed up on my land to sell it. Upon discovery I had been living on the land since 1975 and paying taxes on it since 1983, but my name was not on the deed, the auctioneer (and member of the OOB town hall) cancelled the auction and ordered a town hall meeting to review the situation. Upon investigation it was discovered that when the land went from my grandmother to me, my father signed as "joint witness" and then a year later, went back to the town hall to have my name removed from the deed and his put on it, even though he had no legal write to do so. After that, the record shows that every 3 to 5 years, he and my mother swapped names on the deed, sometimes his name, sometimes her name. The land changed ownership names more then 30 times between 1983 and 2013. 

Because I have severe agoraphobia, I had not set foot off of my land since the 1970s. When it came time to pay the taxes, I gave my father the money and he delivered it to the town hall, or so I thought. In 2014, I learned that in spite of my paying my taxes like clockwork, since 2006, the town hall had no record of receiving any money. It is unclear where the money went. On one hand it looks like my father spent the money and never paid the taxes. On the other hand it looks like he sometimes did pay the taxes but instead of going to the tax office he gave the money to Kathy BR in the permits office and she gave the money to a guy called JB who went to prison for embezzling $3million in OOB tax money from the town hall. JB did not work for the town hall, he was a software designers who built the online banking security for the town hall to direct deposit money to the bank, and according to the FBI the money was going to his bank account not the town hall bank account, but he was only found with $30k not $3million. I don't know the full details, I only know this part, because when we tried to find out why my land was being auctioned this is the info we were given.

In any case, at some point my dad stole my land via just walking into the town hall and asking the desk clerk to remove my name from the deed and put his name on it instead. The whole thing was done illegally and without my knowledge or permission.

There were 3 lands originally. 144, 146, and 146a. My father stole all 3 of them. 144 was auctioned off to the Collard family in 2007, even though I was still living there until 2015 without any knowledge of the auction happening. No one informed me. I've since spoken with the Collards and they were unaware of the situation. They actually bought the land legally even though it was stolen land they had bought, they were unaware the land had been stolen. Everything has been straightened out between me and the Collards, they are not part of the current problem.

My mother owns 146a, but she owns it illegally. She claims it's rightfully hers because my father gave it to her, but, he stole it from me via illegally rewriting the deed, so he had no right to give it to her.

In 2014 and 2015, all the court and legal work was done to restore 146 back to me.

The current situation is my parents are in an active attempt to remove my name off the deed again, like they had done back in 1983.

On a daily basis my mother shows up and first words out of her mouth every day is: "What are we going to do about Wendy? She can't keep that land. I need a house in Kennebunk." to my father.  She started doing this in August, originally bragging that she was going to take my land out of retaliation for my refusal to cast death curses on Chris at work. I don't know who "Chris at work" is. It was one of the names on her list of people she wants me to kill via death spell curses. I was live streaming on Twitch the day she came in yelling about "Chris at work" and my need to kill him for her, so a lot of people online heard her saying these things. I'm a YouTube gamer, I have a livestream going almost daily for 12+ hours a day, so when she comes in, #1 it's breaking and entering because I didn't let her in, and #2 she is interrupting my live streams quite regular so I have hundreds of video footage clips of her saying these things and making these threats. The day she and my father cut the cable/internet wires off my apartment building - I have that on livestream footage as well. My father cut the wires off the house while my mother was ordering him to do it. In November 2021 and again 2 days ago March 9, 2022.

They both make the claim I don't need internet, because I am as they put it "being a bad daughter" because I "won't sell your land and give me the money for a down payment, I need a down payment, you are supposed to give me the down payment money for a house, I'm your mother!"'

As for what happened to my car March 9, 2022 - my father, my father vandalized my car and tried to make it look like my brother  did it. My father stuffed the tailpipe full of McDonald's ketchup packets that he stole from the Biddeford McDonald's where my brother works, which is what caused the fuel line to blow up. I could have died. My car is now being repaired again, for the exact same thing I had to have it repaired for in November 2021. My father tried to kill me and make it look like my brother who works at McDonald's did it so my brother would be blamed. Twice. Once in November 2021 and again 2 days ago.

My father did the same thing in November, because of some guy named Todd who I supposedly convinced to kill himself via may painting a "suicide demon" on my car. There is a picture of Etiole on my car, that is what they are calling "a suicide demon"

I don't know who Todd is, but I assume the Biddeford police know as they did spend a week scrapping the thousands of exploded parts of him off all the houses around Cutts st and South st, after he jumped in front of a train November 19, 2021 at 6:27PM. I was walking my dog and saw him, he was gibbering a lot of wild nonsense stuff like: "fibbery-gibbit-beebydi-booop-bop-boop-bop-booop-beeeeeeeep!" I amused he was either very drunk or very high on drugs or both and was attempting to make train sounds while he ran up and down the train tracks. I thought nothing of it, as he did this on a daily basis all summer long, he was a homeless man who lived in the ravine by the train tressal bridge over the river, the one the police kept chasing out of the black grain building turned storage units. There were 4 people on bicycles, driving circles around him bullying him, teasing him, taunting him daily around 3AM every morning. I saw them while I was walking my dog. It appeared to be his girlfriend and her friends based on the stuff she was yelling at him. Stuff like "You run off with that whore will you! WW I showed you! I killed your dog! Hahahahahaha! I killed your cat! Hahahahaha! And you ain't never gonna see your baby again! Hahahahaha!" I know every one says he commit suicide, but I think he was just running to get away from the harassers on the bikes and was too drunk to see the train. That's certainly what it looked like to me.

THAT was not a suicide, not what I saw happen. That was a man being bullied and chased down by four harassers riding bicycles up the tracks, driving him head on into a train on purpose to try to kill him so they could laugh about it. I wouldn't call THAT a suicide.

Anyways, I didn't know his name or that my mother was best friends with him. Though I had told her about the homeless man being bullied and her response was "Why should I care? It's just a homeless man!" She changed her tune quite a lot after he got hit by the train, and found out his name. The police contacted her or something, when they were trying to find his family. I guess she knew his family on FaceBook or something.

Since his death, me, my car, and my apartment have been attacked on a near daily basis from people who are making the claim that I am online spreading rumours and lies about Todd. I kept asking them who Todd was (because at that point I did not yet know they were talking about the homeless man hit by the train - though I saw him daily for about 4 months, ever since the police kicked him out of the storage until he'd been living in and he lived under the train bridge and in Rotary Park instead - he only ever spoke to me a few times - once to pet my dog and say "they took my dog" and saying "hi" as we passed on the sidewalk. So I never knew his name. He lived in a yellow pup-tent beside the tracks for a while, but one day it was laying out there cut to ribbons by a knife or scissors.)

Even though I only knew him from saying "hi" each night as we passed each other on the sidewalk and I never knew his name until after his death, more then a dozen people have arrived in my driveway (both the Biddeford and Old Orchard addresses) to accuse me and my friend Etiole and the words painted on my Volvo of being the cause of this Todd guy's train death.

They are focusing heavily on the words on my car, which say: "Have information about the murder of my family? Call FBI @ 207-774-9322"

There is a sign in my Old Orchard driveway which says: "Have information about the murder of my children? Call FBI @ 207-774-9322"

On November 14, 2013, at Southern Maine Community College, while I was 8 months pregnant, I was attacked by 3 people with golf clubs. A man and 2 women.

There is no reason for anyone who is NOT involved in the murder of my baby, to be upset about either the sign in my yard or the sign on my car, both of which are nothing more then the FBI phone number with the request for anyone who has information to call.

I don't understand why me asking for people to help find my baby's killer, is seen by my parents as such a huge threat. The only person who who feel threatened by that would be the person who hired the golf club people - Claire, Kendra, and the bald man - who have still not yet been found/caught/identified to this day 9 years later.

Both my mother and my father keep saying and I quote "take that shit off your car, you are only trying to start trouble!" and "get that sign out of your yard, you are only trying to stir stuff up". I'm trying to find the people who murdered my baby and left me crippled for the rest of my life. I'm not doing anything wrong. I'm not trying to cause trouble. How is me asking people to help identify the murderer, me trying to start trouble?

I was paralyzed for 5 months. I had to relearn to walk. I crippled the rest of my life, and my baby is dead. No one should have to live through this type of agony. And no one who commits crimes like this should be allowed to walk free. Would you stand back and do nothing, say nothing, while a criminal like that walked free? How is my asking people to come forward with any information they know, me trying to start trouble? You tell me that!

I'm not allowed to ask for help in finding the psychopath who murdered my baby and left me crippled for the rest of my life? What kind of logic is that?

Someone out there knows the names of these people. The older blond woman they called Claire, the younger blond woman with the Shirley Temple sausage curls, the red haired woman they call Kendra, the white haired man with the green pick up truck, the bald man with the 4door white pickup truck, the new redhaired women who screams on the front porch. These people, this group, they are the ones who were wielding golf clubs and murdered my baby. They are being allowed to get away wit murder and I'll spend the rest of my life demanding justice if I have to. You tell me, how is my asking if you know who they are, don't let them kill again, tell the FBI everything you know, by painting that request on my car and a sign in my yard, me looking to start trouble? My mother's priorities are fucked up. All she cares about is money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money! 

I'm the bed ridden, crippled by multiple attacks. The November 14, 2013 golf club attack, I was almost healed from, but the June 2016 shopping cart attack at my workplace at Scarborough WalMart re opened the 2013 injury and doctors can't operate this time because of the bone shards severing my spinal column. I'm crippled for the rest of my life and no one in this family ever cared. 

Both attacks the FBI wanted to talk to my parents and they refused to talk to him both times. My baby was murdered in the first attack. I was 8 months pregnant and all any of them would do was gibberish about "rosemary baby" and say there was no baby because it was a demon because it was Etiole's. My parents and the Atwaters hate Etiole that much, that they shun the existence of my baby and act like it was never there. That's how much they hate me. That's how cruel and hate filled they are towards me. They spent the last 50 years calling me demon possessed and them saying that is WHY local people attack me and killed my baby and left me crippled for the rest of my life. 

I am in bed 15 or more hours a day, I can barely sit up, I can barely stand up long enough to cook, I have to wear adult diapers since 2013 because half my organs don't work any more because the nerves from those organs to my spine are cut off. My hands shake so bad that it takes me hours to eat a single meal. I can't go back to college, I can't go back to work. But do they care? No. Not my mother. Not my father. Neither of them give a shit. They are both too damned selfish thinking about their own greed to ever once lift a finger to help me. Daddy treats me like a fucking slave and my mother is so far out of my life shunning me because bishop kenning in Saco ward told her too that she hasn't got a clue how bad things are.

I'm not doing a damned thing to any of them. I mind my own business. I write my novels. I don't contact them. I don't talk to them. I don't talk about them.  Someone is clearly pretending to be me online and is slandering me and getting sick of it. My mother flips out about everything thing under the sun and I never have a clue what she's talking about, because I never did or said any of the things she accuses me of. And my father and the Atwaters do the same thing. Some one is out there pretending to be me to get them worked into a frenzy just to sit back and laugh while watching my mother, my father, and the Atwaters be too damned stupid to think. My mother and my father and the Atwaters are all filled with so much pure hatred for me that it takes nothing to convince them to attack me. And whoever it is posting online pretending to be me, knows that and is taking advantage of it. 

They are obsessed with my land, because my mother's father used to tell people there was $7million in gold buried on my land. Several times over the years the Atwaters have invaded bringing with them shovels, pickaxes, and construction equipment, to illegally dig up my land. They've ripped up flowers, dug up bushes, cut down trees... usually they do it while I'm gone to the store, so I come back to find my property ripped to shreds. They've been doing this on an almost yearly basis since Grammy Helen died in 1983. According to what David Henry Atwater claimed, pirates buried treasure on my land in the 1500s. There is ZERO evidence that pirates ever buried anything on my land. Later he changed the story and said that the gold plates of the Book of Mormon Part 2 were buried on my land, this time he claimed an angel from god told him. So the Atwaters have multiple excuses for why they arrive to dig everything up, but it's always that they are gold crazy and have gold fever and are convinced if they dig long enough they'll find gold on my land.

The other obsession they have with my land is a homeless man they call "Etiole". They sometimes claim he is a demon, they other times claim he is an alien, for a few years they called him a cryptid, they often say he's the Mememegwasi spirit of the Saco River Curse, a few of them say he's a watcher/fallen angel, some say he's a ghost of an Indian chief, some say he's the ghost of a French solider, some have called him a Faerie/Leprechaun/FarDarrig ... and a whole slew of other claims. Regardless of what they call him, they all adimintly refuse to believe that he is just an ordinary human, an elderly homeless man who keeps to himself and desperately wants them to leave him alone. That's all he is. He's just a homeless man who lives in the woods and wants them to leave him alone.

The Atwaters are obsessed with Etiole on severe levels and have gone to alarming levels of monstrous harassment of him through the past 50 years. Part of their obsession with him, is caused by their previously mentioned gold fever. You see, Etiole travels all over Maine, I never know where he is at any given time, but when he's in the local area, I let him camp out on my land. I've let him stay with me like this for over 40 years. In the 1980s, one of the times they arrived to dig up my land, Etiole was sleeping in my 1964 Dodge 330, and according to them, he jumped out of the car and "threw blue lighten bolts" at them causing a tornado to destroy their construction equipment. They claimed he turned into a black serpent with red eyes and 6 blue wings that was hundreds of feet long, surrounded them and killed several of them by summoning lightning bolts. . . . uhm . . . yeah. I wasn't home so I didn't see this event, of Etiole supposedly attacking them. But it's pretty clear they had some sort of massive LSD hallucination, given many of them heavily used LSD back in the 1970s and 1980s when this event happened. According to Etiole, he just jumped out of the car and ran into the swamp to hide, he didn't see any of the stuff they described.

After that they got it into their heads that I had summoned a demon (and that Etiole was said demon) to protect my secret cache of pirate gold, and their battle cry of "kill the demon" is what caused them to blow up my house with a bomb October 18, 2006, drive over my house with a backhoe August 8, 2013, beat me up with golf clubs and murder my baby November 14, 2013, cut my 1964 Dodge 330 in half May 10, 2010. All those things you have all those police reports about.

They are convinced Etiole is in my yard to keep them from my gold. The only problem is, there is no gold on my land. Etiole is not a demon, and their extreme levels of harassment are utterly insane! 

But then, when they get caught on my camera, because I'm a daily vlogger, so the camera is running all the time, them they accuse me of harassing them, because their faces showed up on my livestream. Uhm... I'm on y own land, in my own bedroom, usually a few hours into my daily livestream when they get caught in the background trespassing. That's NOT me harassing them. That's them trespassing and vandalizing, and breaking and entering while not realizing I was home and them getting caught in the act of vandalizing and trespassing.

Then they run to FaceBook and make all kinds of wild claims about me stalking them. I'm crippled. I can't even get out of bed. Every time I have them on camera, it's because they were trespassing and breaking and entering. I'm in my bedroom livestream a game on my computer and they'll be smashing out windows and get mad that it happened to be the window in line with my livestream webcam on my computer. That's NOT be stalking them. That's me laying in bed playing Witcher 3 and them breaking in.

I'm too damned sick and crippled to even attempt to do half the crazy shit my mother and my father are accusing me of. And what's worse, my father is right here in the same apartment with me. He sees me every day, he knows how bad off my health is. 

Look how much I'm bleeding all over the house every day. Massive nose bleeds that last for hours to a time, not bleeding from my nose. Just coming out of my nose. I'm so dizzy I can't sit up for weeks to a time. I faint and blackout when I try to get up to go to the bathroom. The pain in my hip and pelvis and knee and spine is so bad I can't even move my fingers to type my novels. 

And look at what they do. Do they really think I'm physically capable of doing the things they accuse me of? They are so damned self centred and paranoid. It's all I can do just to sit up and eat something, how the hell do they think I can do the stuff they accuse me of? My day is spent focusing on trying to get my leg to move so I can make a meal, I don't even have time to think about them. 

It looks more and like my mother and my father are doing this stuff on purpose to try to kill me. My father knows how bad off my heart and lungs are and how difficult it is for me to breath after just a couple of steps. His mother left that land to me in her will in 1983. He stole it, had it put into his name illegally. He's been pissed ever since her death, because she gave everything to me not him. That's been a big problem for him for the last 40 years. He raves about it alongside his ravings about going to Utah taking him off the fire department. He hates my mother because of Utah, blames her every day for losing his fire department pension. He raves about it all night long every single night. He blames me for his mother disinheriting him. He raves about that all the time too. I was only grandchild That's why she left everything to me. Including the land that he stole and put in his name. That land is rightfully mine, his mother gave it to me, and he can't stand it. He's needling my mother about the land just to spite his mother.

He's only trying to get the land away from me because he is mad that the town didn't take it. His mother wanted it to stay in the family. It had been in her family since 1530. Her family was the original settlement family of Old Orchard and my land is that spot that the first house in Old Orchard was built.  My father stopped paying taxes to spite his mother and lose the land. He said so many times. He was angry when I bought the land back from the town. He still is. He wants it out of the family because his mother wanted it in the family. That's why he's trying to turn my mother against me over the land. Because he gates his own mother that much.

Keep in mind the 4 door white truck showed up at my workplace daily. Even though I never knew ahead of time what store I would be working at. I was a retail merchandiser and stocked shelves at dozens of stores all over the state. Walmart's every where, CVS, khols, sometimes local, sometimes as far as Freeport and once in Vermont and once in Massachusetts.  I got the notice of which store to be at 15 minutes before I left. So the only person who ever knew where I was going was my father. 

And yet the 4 door white truck would also arrive ahead of me and be waiting. They didn't follow me, they got their first.

And the police caught the truck and the driver in 2017. Kathy BR owned the truck. Her son was the driver.

The smith's are my parents friends. My mother's visiting and home teachers for years.

Kathy was the district emergency dispatch for all the towns in the area, not just old Orchard. That's why none of the 911 calls went through during the attacks by the 4 door white truck. He only attacked while she was on duty. She never forwarded any of the calls so officers never were told to come help me.

That includes the November 14, 2013 golf club attack in South Portland. But the college security officer made a report even though the police never arrived. That big black officer who was head of security was on duty and him and 2 student officers from the police academy made the report.

And FBI found the data from the calls, that never got forwarded to police, that's why Kathy BR lost her job. Because she's the one who tampered with the 911 call files.

Tim and Kathy BR both, not together, individually, arriving separately, both arrived at my tent multiple times throughout the entire year of 2013, saying they were coming to speak to me on behalf of someone who wanted to remain anonymous. So I never knew who sent them. Each time they arrived all they would say was that I had to tear down "the little yellow house" as they called the shop. 

August 8, 2013 the backhoe drove over the shop while I was at work on the food truck down by the pier.

I never saw Tim or Kathy again after that. Not once. And these were people who stopped by to visit my parents daily for over 40 years. Since August 8, 2013 and the backhoe attack on my house, Kathy and Tim have gone to alarming extreme levels to avoid running into me. They just down the street, on one of the private drives, so it's difficult to avoid running into me, and we used to see them a few times a week at local grocery stores. They both, if they see me in a store, literally throw whatever they are carrying across the store and run out of the store like they have a pack of rabid wolves on their heels. It's pretty fascinating thing to see.

My cousin and next door neighbour Tim Murphy was murdered that same week, a few days before the backhoe. His body was left at the cascade Ross road crossroad. 14 days later his head was left at the Portland Ave Ross road crossroad road. His mother put up the big white cross a month later. 

Note that there were THREE 4-door white trucks, a smaller one, a larger one, and a mega-sized giant one -like a Dodge Power Wagon type only it was not a Dodge Power Wagon it was one of the look alike brands, possibly a Nissan. The owner and driver of the big-big-super sized one is still unidentified. The other 2 were both caught in 2017, Kathy BR's truck being the larger of the 2. The 3 trucks often showed up together and drive circles around me, on Rout 1/Portland Rd, while I was driving. They would slam my car from back and sides and push me off the road. Several times they did damage to the frame of my car with had to be repaired multiple times. They've done several tens of thousands in damages to my Volvo over the years. You already have a lot of the smashed up car photos on file, at both Biddeford and Old Orchard police departments, you each have more then a dozen reports for attacks on my car -though the FBI has said someone attempted to destroy several of the records with my name, at the Old Orchard police department. FBI said they arrested the officers who did that. I don't know which files were damaged or how. 

For several years/decades now, I have had multiple people trying to buy my land. The same people over and over again. Only buying my land is not what they are asking for. Rather, they claim my land is cursed and I have to sell it to break the curse. Crazy, I know, but that's what they say. The crazier part is they say that after I sell my land I have to hand the money over to them so they can use it as a down payment on a house they want to buy in Kennebunk. The people in question are my parents and they've been doing this for well over 20 years now. I've always said "no, I'm not selling my land" and left it at that.

My mother (she changes her last name often, I'm not sure which she currently uses) and my father my father both have become extreme hostile and violent the past 2 weeks, and I'm not sure what set them off, but they are hyper infuriated on my refusal to sell my land and give them the money for a down payment of a house in Kennebunk. 

I did not suspect them, all these years, because always been other people showing up and say they were contacting me on behalf of someone who wanted to remain anonymous, but now they are directly doing it themselves.

Starting in June 2001, lots of harassment started and at first, I did not suspect them, or think there was a connection. But now they are outright bragging to my face, that they are the ones behind the vandalism. Like I said, check the police records for 144, 146, 148 Portland Ave from June 2001 til current date. There have been dozens of attacks, including drive by shootings, the bombing of my house, the backhoe driving over my next house, me being beat up with golf clubs which is why I am crippled now for the rest of my life and how my baby died.

The FBI is involved. If you need more information beyond what I've written here,  FBI Agent Andy Drewer can be reached at 207-774-9322 he is at the Portland Office on Middle Street, he is in charge of the investigation, of several events, namely the 2013 Boston Marathon bombing, which my uncle Paul Martel went to prison for building the bomb and selling it to ISIS. The 2006 bombing of the house at 144 Portland Ave Old Orchard Beach, Maine. My baby was murdered November 14, 2013, a backhoe drove over my house at 146 Portland August 8, 2013 that's why I'm at the Biddeford apartment right now, because we can't get Kathy BR at the town hall to get a building permit, even though she's not the one in charge of that, she takes over our application and won't let it be approved, because she claims I shouldn't be allowed to live in Old Orchard, due to my having left the Mormon church to become a Voodoo Priestess, she says that makes me a witch and I'm not allowed to apply for a house building permit on those grounds, so, it's been 9 years and I'm still without a house on my land in Old Orchard and still stuck in a Biddeford apartment.

It is a long list of a lot of things happening. I'll try to organize it all in order:

At it's start, the whole thing goes back to a homeless man who wishes to remain anonymous, so I'm not using his real name here, nor have I ever used his real name anywhere online or offline or with any conversation with any one.

He, didn't do anything wrong. Quite the contrary, all he's ever done is live in the Ross Forest and surrounding swamps and marshes along the Saco River in Pine Point, OOB, Saco, Biddeford, and probably other areas, he moves around a lot rotating where he sets up camp, something he's done since 1953. I know quite a few people have seen him and talked to him, I don't know if any police officers have ever encountered him or not. Because he is elderly and in frail health, I often let him stay on my land. He's the ONLY person who has permission to be there. Herein lays the problem: he's deformed from acid burn scars covering most of his body. Churches around the area have spent decades accusing him of being a cryptid, alien, demon, watcher, fallen angel, you name it, someone has called him some weird conspiracy. According to him, himself, he was a Jewish WW2 concentration camp survivor, who arrived in OOB with a bunch of other refugees in 1953. Because he's so deformed by his scars, he was bullied by the locals who refused to believe him a human, and that's why he fled into the forest and never set foot in society again. The problem is, the people harassing me have made up this wild conspiracy that he's a demon and I'm protecting him, and they claim they need to get me off my land in order to get to him.

This all started in 1978.

My parents (my father and my mother), uncles (12), aunts (12+), and cousins (64 at the 1970s/1980s time - more then 400 today), teased and bullied me throughout my childhood about him, but they teased and bullied everyone about everything, so I didn't think that much of their bullying back in the 1970s and 1980s when it first started happening. It was just them being the toxic bullies that they are to everyone.

It wasn't until the 1990s and 2000s that it started to become a problem. And 207 is when I first realized how big of a problem it really was.

In 1996 and 1997 Aunt aunt B sent out lots of emails to the family claiming the emails had been written by me. I did not have email, internet, or even a computer yet. She got Dickie (Richard Merlin Atwater) and David (Atwater) and Joey (Atwater -the one who lives in Australia and is wanted by the FBI for kidnapping and selling babies back in the 1980s- FBI can't arrest him until he leaves Australia -I'm not sure why- so he became a citizen. I don't know the details of what he's wanted for.) in raving warpath over it. All three of them showed up in OOB -even Joey from Australia-though I didn't know he was wanted by the FBI back than. But they arrived here in OOB to yell at me in person, because aunt B made the claim that the emails were from me, so they were all mad at me for having written them, but I never did know the contents of the emails because I didn't write them.

I did not see the emails. I didn't have access to a computer back then ad I didn't have internet until 2007 a full 11 years later. Dickie had several of them printed out and waving them around, but I never got a chance to read what they said. One of the emails was 64 pages long, and according to Dickie was all about aliens. I know nothing about aliens, so most of what he said was just gibberish nonsense to me. This was in 1996, shortly before Heaven's Gate killed 39 people in California and at the time, all 3 of those uncles, plus a few other uncles were members of Heaven's Gate, and one uncle -Mervin Bruce Atwater-made the claim to be "the leader of the Maine division of Heaven's Gate"- I don't know if he actually was a Heaven's Gate leader or not, but he maintained that he was right up until 2019, and in April 2019 he was making the claim to be following Comet Wormwood because HaleBop was the wrong one. Like I said, they were coming up with some pretty wild alien and UFO claims and I'm not sure how much of what they claimed was true.

Well, this was the first time I heard the word "Etiole" which was the nickname they had given to the homeless man who sometimes camped out on my yard. Etiole is not his name, it's always been just the word the Atwaters call him (they say it means man from the stars or alien and that it's a French word. I don't know French, aunt B is the one who knows French, so I never would have given him a French name.) Somewhere in the emails, aunt B had called the homeless man "Etiole" and "amphibious alien" and made the claim that he was an "alien grey" who had abducted me to some mother-ship.  

I have never been abducted by aliens and never made such a claim. I never heard such foolishness. But, that this point, I wasn't fully aware of what they were talking about, so I didn't yet realize they were saying that I was making the claim to have been abducted by aliens.

That's the summer they all showed up talking about Etiole and amphibious aliens and alien abduction. aunt B was the one who started all of that stuff about Etiole, who I never called Etiole. But that was how it got started...all this stuff that is happening now with the vandalism and threats going on this week March 2022.

Bruce and Dickie went to a bunch on MUFON forums from 1996 to 2007 spreading lies about me and Etiole calling him a demon and alien and claiming I was an alien abducted. I found out about what they were doing in 2007 after they'd already been doing it for 11 years. 

I don't think aunt B has ever stopped sending out emails about Etiole while pretended to be me, I think she is still doing it. I think this, because in December 2021, I was at the Biddeford library when an elderly man came over to me, asked if I was EelKat and asked me why I was sending him hundreds of emails about Etiole, and who was Etiole? I told the man I don't use email, I've never emailed anyone, I don't know what he's talking about. He says he gets over 300 emails a day about Etiole from someone claiming to be EelKat. But here's the thing: EelKat is not something I call myself. I'll explain that in a bit.

First, let's go back to 1994. Before aunt B started sending the emails out, while claiming they were written by me. My father (my father) was the one who told the Atwaters about Etiole. My father and Dickie both called him "the white monkey". 

In 1994 and 1996 Bishop Paul Morgan asked me to his office and showed me a bunch of letters, all of them signed "The White Monkey, OST". He said the letters were written to sound like I had written them but he said he'd seen my handwriting before and knew I hadn't written these. The Bishop wanted to know if I recognized the handwriting. Some had been written by my father. Others had been written by Dickie. One was written by my mom's father David Henry Atwater who died several years ago now. This was the Mormon bishop in Cape Elizabeth. This bishop had more then one hundred letters laying on his desk, and he had several boxes more around his desk. He said he received no fewer then 5 letter every day for several months, and was quite concerned for my safety as he felt the letter writers may be "mentally unhinged" and "highly dangerous" based on what he called "several homicidal rants" contained in the letters. He said he was giving the letters to Paul Peterson, at Pine Land Centre Mental Health Institute in New Gloucester, because he felt my father and my uncle Dickie should be committed due to the contents of the letters.

The letters looked physically bizarre. Each one started like a normal letter, straight across sentences, line by line, but upon reaching the end of the page, the words spiralled around the outer edge and into a circle around the page, then upside down bottom to top between the first rows.

Each letter contained codes and cryptographers, and large portions of the letters were unreadable unless you cracked the "secret code" that was included with them.

Both my father and my uncle Dickie frequently wrote in that weird spiral and zigzag of lines fashion. My father's letters were the ones that included the cryptography and hidden codes. Dickies letters were just weird spiralling but no codes to solve.

I did not read any of the letters, but the Bishop was deeply upset by them, and stated that he used to be Catholic before becoming Mormon and said that if he was still Catholic he'd recommend my father had an excorsim down, because as the Bishop put it "the white monkey letters are the closet thing I've ever seen to demon possession".

Later that same year Paul Peterson from Pine Land Centre arrived at church and asked to talk to me. He had with him, some of the White Monkey letters and like the Bishop asked me to id the handwriting.

Stake President Earnshaw (of the same church) later called me in to his office for similar letters he had also received and again the white monkey letters were written by mostly daddy and some Dickie all pretending to be me, trying to make it look like I was pretending to be Etiole. 

In total 16 Bishops and 2 stake presidents had contacted me over the years about white monkey letters, all citing they were receiving them daily. Some said members were receiving them. When I stopped attending the Mormon church, my mother's minister's at the 15 churches she was attending at the time, all started getting the letters. (At the time my mom had a belief that she had to be in church as close to 24 hours a day as possible, so she was attending week day church services at every church that had them, even though she was not a member of most of those churches. She became an atheist last I had heard and attends no churches at all anymore as far as I know.) 

My father was in and out of the hospital a lot during this time period (1991 to 1996-ish), due to the violent fights between him and my mother which included him twice being hospitalized due to blood gushing head injuries from a brick, which also included OOB police arresting my mother for beating him said brick. The psychiatrist from Pine Land Centre felt that my dad suffered serious brain damage from one of the brick beating attacks, and wanted him to press charges against my mother, but he refused. The psychiatrist said he felt that my dad's White Monkey letters was a side effect of the multiple head injuries he was hospitalized for. 

The white monkey letters stopped in 2007 when the psychiatrist at Biddeford hospital diagnosed my father as having schizophrenia and put him on psychiatric medicine. The Biddeford police have this arrest on record. We were living at Water st at the time and my father had tried to kill me and my brother Joshua and also himself. The police arrested him. He was in the psych ward for around a week, and released because of the drastic change in his personality that was caused by the medication. He was only released on the condition that he maintained the meds.

Since 2007 no one has mentioned Etiole or the white monkey, until November 19, 2021, when things (the vandalism and harassment and threats) started escalating, the week Todd Murphy died when people started showing up in Biddeford driveway yelling about Etiole and calling him a suicide demon, claiming my Volvo was demon possessed, and accusing me of driving my car around town to drive people to suicide. I don't know who these people were. The one doing most of the yelling has very unique and very identifiable hair: it's a "high fashion" stick straight bob, like what you see in Italy Runways, super stiff as a board, stick straight, like she uses a few jars of jell to get it so straight. And a weird dark-purple tinted red. Very anime cartoon looking hair. You can't mistake it. She always wears big dark glasses, and usually has a little skinny blond man with her, who appears to be her husband or boyfriend. She frequently is beating him over the head with a baby car seat, while yelling at me and my car, while standing on the front porch of our building. They don't live here, I don't know who they re or where they come from. She did it almost every day of December, and most of the last week of November 2021.

This is the first time anyone has mentioned Etiole in years.

They call him Etiole sometimes, White Monkey other times. 

I should tell you where the term "white monkey" come from.

There was a white monkey, in OOB in the 1970s. It belonged to Helen Pearly of Pine Point and was part of her "White Animal Farm" zoo that she ran, which was a little petting zoo of all albino animals. I think it shut down in the early 1980s. Most older folks of the area remember Helen Pearly and her albino zoo animals - which included an elephant, and other such animals. Well, one day the white monkey escaped and Helen Pearly was a friend of my grandmother's (Helen Ricker Allen) and Helen Pearly showed up at 146 Portland Ave (than 862 because the road was renumbers in 1982) to tell my Grammy Helen the monkey had been seen nearby and to let her know if we saw it. Well, after that me and the other neighbour kids started going out into the swamps looking for the white monkey because Helen Pearly was offering a reward for it being returned. And one day we saw it, and tried to catch it and we followed it into the swamps and we found a homeless man out there. He was sick and starving to death. 

The white monkey belonged to Helen Pearly and has nothing to do with Etiole at all. In 1978 Helen Pearly had a pet white monkey that got lost. Me and Atwater cousin Micheal and my Murphy cousin Timmy (the one whose white cross is on the Ross rd he died in 2013) saw it in the woods out back and tried to catch it. We found Etiole the same day. Etiole is a homeless man who lives behind my land in the woods. Me and Micheal and Timmy took him food. And to this day, we still do, except Michael moved away and Timmy died in 2013 so that left just me taking care of Etiole today. Etiole is very old, probably 80s or 90s today. He's very small, not much bigger than a child, maybe around 5'1"-ish. He's covered with acid burns, scars, and tattoos. He has extreme PTSD and is terrified of the sight of people. He's very skittish, almost mute, speaks mostly with his hands, and run terrified from any people who try to get near him. The only reason he didn't run the day we found him, was because he was very sick, probably pneumonia or something like that. Had we children not found him and taken him food for the next several weeks, he probably would have died that same summer. He must have been in his 50s or 60s back then in 1978.

We told the adults about him, and they went to find him, but, they found some plants instead out there in the swamp, and my mom called the police, and the OOB police called the state police, and the state police called the FBI and the entire rest of the week was lots of police digging up lots of plants. Adam and the Babe, were 2 police officers who were left to stand watch over us children while every one else hauled out the plants. News reporters showed up and the news stations called it "Maine's largest drug raid". I don't know what drug plants look like so I don't know what kind of drugs they were. According the the FBI agents who talked to use kids (we were all 5 to 10 years old at the time) a "bad name named Bryan Cyr put those bad plants in the swamp". The FBI agents said they had been looking for Bryan Cyr and his Cyr Clan from Connecticut for several years and wanted to know had we seen him.  We had not, though we did see him about a year later when the big shoot out happened at 142 Portland Ave in front of the Dome house - the day the dome house blue up because Anne Cyr set fire to the meth lab inside- I saw her poured 3 gas cans on the house then throw several matches. Bryan fled in a robin egg blue micro-mini pick up truck, screaming that the meth lab was gonna blow. The whole house went up like a mushroom cloud. It's the only time I ever saw the Cyr Clan.) 

Adam and the Babe went with us kids to look for the sick homeless man/Etiole as he's now called by locals, but he was gone by then, because it had been 5 or 6 or more hours since the adults found the plants. The 2 police officers looked all over the forest for him, and stopped when they found a human leg bone in the Bachelder Brooke and took that with them and left to join the other officers. (144, 146, and 148 Portland Ave and the swamps and forest behind it is a massive Native American grave - there are at least 500 graves, that back in the 1970s all still had markers, most of the dates are 1400s to 1500, but in the mid 1980s someone stole most all of the slate grave markers, so they are unmarked today. I assume the leg bone was from one of those graves - human bones wash up out of the ground all the time on these sections of land because there are just so many Native American graves all over the place here, on my land and the lands abutting me. It's why the Powder Horn campground can't expand any closer to my land - they hit Native American graves last time they expanded the campground.)

So, because they got sidetracked by all the drug plants and all the police everywhere for the rest of the week, the adults never saw the homeless man or the white monkey as both had been scared off by the huge crowd of drug raid crews.

For some reason because we found him while looking for Helen Pearly white monkey my father and the Atwaters got it in their heads that Etiole was a demon alien shape shifter who turned into a white monkey to lure me and Micheal into the woods. And that's how their stupid ass alien and demon rumours got started.

I should point out, her family, The Atwaters, are the Scottish Traveller Gypsies, aka as The Scottish Mafia by several white Americans, her brothers Bruce and David and several of Davids adult children, grandchildren, and great grand children call themselves Scottish Mafia  and act every bit fitting on that title, which is both why the FBI is investigating and why I have nothing to do with them.

Right after the June attack on her car, a large group of Irish Travellers showed up from the Carilinas and Tennessee and were setting up squatting camps all around the area, The had set up a large camp on BB street behind my Main st/Cutts St apartment in Biddeford, setting up in the big chain link fenced yard on the corner (which is why the owners have since roped the land off.) I didn't think anything of it at first, because the Irish Travellers show up in Southern Maine every year for decades now, so there's nothing unusual about seeing them setting up camps on any space they can find, you see it every year. Usually they camp on the cow farms in Dayton/Buxton/North Saco area, so seeing them in Biddeford was a bit strange.

I point this out because the week they arrived on BB, my mother and her Atwater siblings and their families flipped out big time. They put heavy focus on "the brown house on the corner and the chain link fence yard across the street" and laid out to harassing the landlords of those two locations. They had a list of around 100 addresses in Biddeford, Cape Elizabeth, and many other places included Rhode Island and Connecticut. I saw the list because my mother showed up at my yard waving it around and demanding I help her and the Atwaters stage an attack on the Irish Travellers, whom she claimed was family of the man in the green truck with the 2x4 attack on her car.

A war between the Scottish Travellers/Scottish Mafia/The Atwaters and the Irish Travellers -which include The Cry Clan drug gang from Connecticut - the one the FBI is here looking for-, is the last thing I want to get involved in. Those same two clans are the ones who did the 4-5-8 shoot out back in the 1970s/1980s, when they blew up the dome house at 142 Portland Ave. They were armed to the teeth with truck loads and school bus loads of illegal military guns back in the 4-5-8 shoot out and I don't want to see what kind of weaponry that same group lugs around now 40 years later.

I am a Voodoo Priestess. Voodoo is also known as Folk Catholicism. It is a branch of the Catholic Church. Voodoo is a Christian religion, that focuses on reverence the ancestors. Hollywood Horror movies have slandered our religion to such an extent that the average person thinks Voodoo is dark magic, death spells, curses, and voodoo dolls. Those are all things that exist only in Hollywood and do not exist in real world Voodoo. The problem is made worse, when teens and young adults, not knowing the actual religion, call themselves Voodoo while practising things they see in movies.  While the older generations of Gypsies and Travellers know the difference, younger generation have fallen far from the old traditions, especially the old religion, and sadly, even among Gypsies and Travellers today, many in the age group of 60 years old and younger, only know Voodoo from Horror movies and not from their grandmother's actual practice.

I say this because my mother and her Atwaters wanted me to join then as a "figure head" for their cause. They specifically demanding I summon demons, make voodoo dolls, cast curses, and use magic to kill the list of people living at the addresses on the list they had. In short they attempted to hire me to be a quasi-hit-man for them.

When I explained to them that this is not what Voodoo is about, Voodoo is peaceful, non-violent, we shun weapons and hurtful acts of all types, they lashed out at Etiole -who was not here, it was just me they were yelling at, yelling about him. My mother called Etiole a demon, said he was my familiar, said "I know you work with demons, you can't lie to me" and "you cast death curses on people all the time you lying little bitch, you just won't do it for me because you want to spite your mother, after all I do for you!

I made a Twitch livestream video that same day, telling what was going on and what I feared was about to happen, because I have seen these same two Gypsy clans go to war with each other before.

Well, I have too much to deal with with my health. I'm bedridden 15+ hours a day, so I do nothing but play video games and write novels and edit novels, ALL of which I do on livestream - yes, I livestream for 12 to 15, sometimes 19 hours each and every single day, and I have 92TB of hard drive full of that video footage all the way back to 2015 - I have every minute of every day of my life not only live streamed on Twitch, but I have ALL the video footage files, which mean I have footage of all the attacks, all the yelling at my car, all the demanding I cast death spells, all the trying to hire me as a hit man - all of it. I have over 15k hours of video footage. And because most of the attacks happened during a livestream, there are also hundreds of witness online who saw and heard the attacks and threats already, seeing and hearing them as they were happening.

Going back to the suspecting someone is impersonating me... My mother makes the claim that it is her right to cut the wires off my Biddeford apartment building, because she claims I've put her name, address, and where she goes online. I've never put her address or name or where she goes on the internet. Don't know what she's talking about. I gave her the FBI contact info and told her that if she actually is seeing "me" posting this stuff she claims I'm posting online, then she needs to forward that stuff to the FBI because it's someone impersonating me, and that was one of the things the FBI has suspected was happening so they are actively looking for that kind of stuff. They are trying to get to the bottom of who it is spreading these wild, crazy ass rumours and lies, both doing it in my name and doing it about me.

They've already located a shut down a few dozen impersonation of me, social network accounts, and so far, to date, all of them have belonged to just one person: my mother's brother Mervin Bruce Atwater. Well, it makes sense that HE would know her home address and where she goes, seeing how, for the past decade they were kind of joined at the hip and did everything together. Yeah, of course he knows where she lives and what car she drives and where she goes. 

Also, I never went to school, she did not allow it, There were several legal/court battles between my mom and the OOB school and the state of Maine ad the department of education throughout the 1980s, over the fact that she was actively refusing to allow me to attend school. So I never learned to do math or numbers. I don't know how to count or do money or any stuff like that. And numbers don't register in my head for some reason. People will tell me a phone number or home address and 5 seconds later my mind is blank on the numbers. I can't remember them. That's why when something like an attack happens I write down the tie and date immediately and keep it on a chart - I have a list, day by day, all times and dates of every attack since June 2001. I wouldn't be able to remember what happened when if I didn't keep a list like that.

Well, my mother knows all of this, so she knows even if she had told me her address, which she didn't, I wouldn't have remembered it long enough to even write it down.

In June 2021, I found out she moved, because I was walking my dog -we walk 3 to 4 miles a day, all over Biddeford, Old Orchard, and Scarborough, because I am trying to rebuild my leg muscles after having been bedridden since 2013, with only minimal movement- Doctors said I would never walk again and I aim to prove them wrong and well I have, because I am at least walking enough to walk my dog each day, but it is very difficult, and every step I take feels like a sword stabbing up my right leg and into my spine, because of the nerve damage. It is why I walk so slow and limp so bad, because it hurts terrible to step down.

Well, one day I was walking my dog and all of a sudden, there's my mother, telling me that I'm standing in front of her house and I was surprised, because last I knew she lived several miles away. I had no clue she lived 2 streets over from me and that she had done so for 3 years!

I don't know how she expects me to even know where she goes considering I've had no contact with her in almost a decade now, not since the stunt she pulled April 10, 2015 when she broke into my motorhome, filled it with feces, and then locked her 13 cats in it to frame me for animal abuse. She did not expect the Old Orchard Beach police to arrive and confiscate her cats and then not give them back to her and she has been in a social media battle with several animal shelters, veterinarians, animal control officers, and police officers ever since. Most of her harassment of these people has been targeted at former OOB town hall worker DF  and OOB police officer WW , both of whom she has been harassing on FaceBook for the past 7 years. You can ask DF  and WW  and their family and friends on FaceBook, how bad it has gotten. In recent months she added a new person to her FaceBook harassment, I don't know their name, just that it's the ex-wife and 15 year old son of someone named Todd Murphy who recently died from being hit by a train in front of my Biddeford apartment on Nov 19, 2021. Sometimes she says his death was a suicide, other times she says he was murdered and thrown in front of the train. I don't know which it is, I didn't know him, and only have her word for any of it.

In her mind, the way the whole thing was supposed to happen was: you police were supposed to confiscate my motorhome and she would take her cats and go home. 

What actually happened was: you police confiscated her cats, and I kept my motorhome.

She has spent the last 7 years harassing every pet shelter and rescue in New England, trying to find the cats.

In answer to questions about the cats from April 2015—those were cats belonging to Wayne Whitten of Biddeford, Maine. I was never able to talk about it because of the court case going on between Wayne's family and the Atwaters.

To make matters even worse, the cats were not hers, either. Rather, they belonged to Wayne Whitten and his daughter. My mother had stolen the cats from Wayne, in an act of retaliation, after Wayne refused to hand over to her, his father, William's land.

If you do not know, there are several polygamists in my family, all on the Atwater side. My mother is one of them. Wayne Whitten is one of her many Husbands, and therefore Wayne Whitten is also my stepfather.

In May 2010, my mother took a chainsaw to my 1964 Dodge 330. But it was not the ONLY car she attacked that week. Two days earlier, she took a chainsaw to Wayne's black 1970s vintage Dodge. AFTER, she locked her Old English sheepdog in the trunk and left it there for 6 months, and then tried to say that Wayne killed her dog, when in fact, she had.

Many people in Biddeford, Maine knew Wayne Whitten and his father William Whitten, and both men were known for the wild tales of Wayne's 5th wife, Jeannie, who daily beat him, gathered her older brothers to beat him, and hospitalized him several times, multiple times nearly killing him. That wife is also my mother.

Unfortunately for Wayne Whitten, no one would believe him about how violent and psychotically deranged his wife was and in the space of only a few weeks, his father, then his cats, and then Wayne himself all died. Because of the violent nature of Wayne's death, details were withheld from the public.

Three cats—the white cat Old Lady, and the 2 tabby's Trouble and Sassy, were already dead before the police arrived, and all three were diagnosed as having been force-fed rat poison. This is why, even though my mother put 13 cats in my motorhome, the police only took 10 cats.

Wayne's father, William, owned the cape house next door to Ben's Flooring in Biddeford, behind Walmart. In his 90s, with his health failing, my mother arrived demanding William sell his house and give her the money for a down payment on a mansion in Kennebunk. The exact same demands she is now making at me, these 7 years later. She did this to William Whitten in 2015, and Wayne's daughter to this day maintains that my mother's threats, demands, and harassment were the major contributing factors of William's death.

My mother took the Whitten cats, intending to hold them hostage, until William sold his house and gave her the money. This was why she hid the cats in my motorhome. This is also why when the police showed up asking about the cats, I had no clue what they were talking about and let them search the motorhome telling them there were no cats in it. My mother broke into my motorhome and hid the cats in there, apparently 3 days earlier, and I was unaware she had done this so was unaware the cats were there.

This is also why, when police officer Will Watson asked how many cats there were and what their names were, why I did not know how many cats there were and only knew the names of a couple of the cats that I had heard Wayne talk about.

William Whitten died while the cat fiasco was going on.

Wayne, realizing what my mother had done to his cats, tried to get them back, but he died a few weeks later.

Wayne, his father, and his cats all died a few weeks apart from each other.

My mother went around triumphantly bragging that she had gotten Wayne's father's land, via being Wayne's wife, and set about to the process of buying the house in Kennebunk. And got slapped with a reality check when the two wills got read and both William and Wayne had left everything they had to Wayne's daughter.

In raging inferno, my mom lashed out at Wayne's daughter, and a lawsuit happened, with Wayne's daughter charging my mother with kidnapping the cats, and using rat poison to slowly poison Wayne. A massive Facebook war happened between the Whittens and the Atwaters as my mother got her Atwater thugs involved, and the Whitten's fled in terror once they realized the rumours that my mother was part of the Scottish Mafia, was in fact, very, very, very true.

To this day, the remains of Wayne Whitten's surviving family live in mortal terror, daily vandalism, and barbaric levels of harassment at the hands of my mother, and her brothers Bruce and David and David's sons and grandsons.

More details of what happened can be found here: Amphibious Aliens: https://www.eelkat.com/AmphibiousAliens.html

And no, for the people who are confused, Amphibious Aliens has nothing to do with aliens. It is about a homeless man whom my mother and her brother Bruce, over hyper focused on, and together my mother and Bruce created an elaborate alien abduction and demon possession hoax, so they could try to scam several dozen locals out of their houses.

This cat stealing, house stealing scam is something they have been doing to people all over Southern Maine since BEFORE I was even born. The earliest known attempt at this house stealing scam dates back to their father David Henry Atwater and a house he stole in the 1930s in Rumford Maine. At the time, my grandfather used the hoax of an angel from heaven coming down and telling him to take the Rumford farm. And at the time, my grandfather was a transport driver for Honey Fizt's ACTUAL Boston Mafia, which is WHY, the Atwaters make the claim to be the Scottish Mafia. Their claim is that because they are Scottish, and their father worked for Honey Fitz that they are Mafia. But the Atwaters are neither Scottish nor Mafia, both claims are outright lies that are nothing more than part of the scam they run.

As can be seen with BOTH what she has spent the past 5 decades doing to Etiole and what she is currently doing to Todd Murphy's family on and off FaceBook, you can see how much my mother hyper focuses on homeless people and abusing their friends and relatives and using the homeless person's homelessness as excuses for the scams she runs.

That she spent decades running a land stealing scam in Etiole's name, and now is running another land stealing scam in Todd Murphey's name is utterly deplorable.

And you people who wonder WHY I've not had contact with my mother in 30 years, WHY I shun her. WHY I hate her and her Atwater thugs so much... you are right now witnessing it live as they do it all over again, this time taking advantage of the pain and suffering of Todd Murphy's family to try to steal land from people in the name of a homeless man who was killed by a train.

I am thoroughly and utterly disgusted with my mother's vile abuse of the Murphy family and what she is doing in the name of a dead man.

I've said it thousands of times before and I'll say it again: The Atwaters are scum.

The Atwaters devote their lives to abusing homeless people and the families of those homeless people, just so they can run their filthy scams, and I’m fucking sick of the Atwaters and their filth.


She has had several retaliation attacks happen to her, done by family and friends of the people she's harassing on FaceBook. the retaliation attacks included a Biddeford Public Works road grader being driven into her yard and over her car in 2017. Two additional attacks on her next car, the following year. And in June 2021 a man driving a green pick up truck drove into her yard and beat her car with a 2by4. (Note, I did not witness any of these attacks on her cars and only have her word on what happened.)

All of these people she is fighting with on FaceBook, I don't know, they are people she knows and they are not on my FaceBook and I blocked her and all the Atwaters from my FaceBook back in May 2015, when her and her nieces and nephews and siblings were posting death threats on my FB profile. One cousin cousin name, posted pictures of herself carrying a machine gun (not automatic rifle - but a machine gun - the big type you put on a tripod and have a belt full of hundreds of bullets slung over your shoulder- similar to a gatland gun but not as big, though she had pictures of her gatland gun too that she was also posting on my FB) She'd write under the pictures "This is the gun I'm going to shoot you with"... her husband was one of the guys arrested after the Jan 6 attack, by the way - the guy in Florida with the Nancy something's ( forget her last name, I think it began with a P? I don't know American politics, I find it all confusing so I'm not sure who the Nancy woman was). He stole her pulpit and  he was posting pictures of him stealing on FB. Her mom is aunt L, and she and he were among the 23 cousins that the FBI has been trying to find because they supplied a lot of the guns for the Jan 6th attack, according to posts they made on FB. I don't know, I never saw any such posts because I have them all blocked n FB since 2015. Her brother cousin name was also posting pictures of him carrying guns and writing death threats underneath on my FB wall. His messages said: "I'm an ordained Aaronic Priest and god has given me permission to blow your brains out with this gun". cousin name and cousin name are 2 of David and aunt L's 15 adult kids -all are 40 to 60+ years old. David is my mom's oldest brother, he's in his 80s. He is very violent, there has never been an occasion of him arriving on my land in Old Orchard, that did not involve his trying to kill me, usually by strangling me. He is the most violent of all the uncles. Several times while he's been here he beat up his adult kids by hitting them in the face with weights off of dumbells. 

Most of the Atwater men are retired Marines, and all of them are over 6'2" the tallest, is 7'3". These guys are HUGE and are all weightlifters. You don't want to cross one of the Atwater uncles, they are former Marines trained in weaponless combat. David runs a compound in Palmyra.. . and you might have just seen his crew in the news - they were doing a squatter's rights takeover of that big mansion next door to Stephen King in Bangor and somehow the place caught fire. The news reports didn't mention Stephen King and went out of their way to get camera angles that kept King's house out of the news, but I'm as familiar with Bangor streets as I am Old Orchard and Biddeford streets, so I recognized which house it was on the news, that got attacked by the squatters doing a take over war. 

My uncle and his kids are trying to confiscate the land all around Stephen King - they say they have the right to because no one was ever paid any money for being in The Thinner movie. That happened about 2 weeks ago, the news did not list the squatters name, but like I said, it's my uncle and his crew, they been focusing on the 20 or so houses around King's big red Victorian, for over a decade now. They tried to get me to help them do it, that's how I found out. They made the claim that because I'm an author I should be able to reason with Stephen King and convince him to hand over his red Victorian house in exchange for his never paying them for being in The Thinner. I told them to get lost and burn in hell. Just because I'm an author and King's film crew filmed a part of Thinner on my land in Old Orchard doesn't mean I know King himself, I never even met him, and them being obsessed with stealing land from people is just out of control. 

The whole Atwater clan does this. They don't see anything wrong with moving in, setting up camp, and driving the rightful land owners off their land at gunpoint.

They act like it's a family tradition to steal land from people, via squatting, harassment, corrosion, death threats, and outright just forging deeds and switching the files, like they did with my land.

And that's the issue we have going on right now. My mother has gone on a psych crazed warpath vendetta of taking my land or else, and or else so far has included her twice now having my father shove things up the tailpipe of my car, both times doing lots of damage t the car when I started the engine and everything inside blew up because of the fuel line blocked. And twice now - each time the same day as attacking my Volvo cutting the wires off the Biddeford apartment as well, in the same driveway where the car was parked.

Both times they admitted to doing it and both times used the justification that I deserved it because I was refusing to sell my land and give my mother the money to buy a house in Kennebunk. She says she has to move to Kennebunk to "get away from the niggars invading Maine, Kennebunk is all white they don't allow no niggars". She's very crude and vulgar and has an extreme hatred for black people and hangs around online with some group that calls itself "the workers of iniquity" which claims to be "a branch of the Ku Klux Klan because the original Ku Klux Klan is not strict enough".

Throughout 2016 people wearing KKK-like white robes and hood showed up in Old Orchard to make threats about my land. Back then I was unaware that my mother was friends with such a group. The robes are NOT KKK robes, the KKK robes are very distinctive, covered with fancy bead work and embroidery, and are not white, but are usually green or red or blue or yellow. It's a Hollywood myth that the KKK wears white, and that's how you can tell REAL KKK from fake wannabe's pretending to be KKK. Real KKK is not wearing white sheets and white pillowcases. The real KKK is a church that is organized similar to Catholic church and all their robes mean specific ranks, also they don't wear hood, they wear mitre hats like the pope does, and have a veil mask over their eyes. So its pretty easy to identify real KKK from fakers in white sheets, and the people showing up in my yard were not real KKK, they were fakers literally wrapped in white bed sheets with pillow cases over their heads. 

Well, various white-power groups show up in the area, that's nothing unusual. Neo-Nazi, Sovereign Citizens, ect. They've always been around Maine, so much so that there are KKK and white power history museums in Maine -one is in Saco. So, I didn't think much of the white hood idiots in my yard. We are Gypsies, white hooded idiots are a part of our non-white life.

Well, here's the thing: we are not white. My mother's mother was not a Gypsy. Eva Viola Little John Dyer Atwater was half Kickapoo Native American and half black. He mother was 100% Native America. Her father 100% black. My mom is 1/4 black, 1/4 Native American, and 1/2 Gypsy of Roumania/Arabian/Middle Eastern descent. There is not one drop of white blood in her. Which is why I was surprised to hear her say: "I gotta move to Kennebunk to get away from the niggars invading Maine, Kennebunk is all white they don't allow no niggars". Yes, Kennebunk is all white, and look at the news, the black school teach who lives in Old Orchard Beach and worked at Kennebunk schools is daily bombarded with swastika painted on her car while she's teaching class. I can't drive my Volvo down main street Kennebunk with out getting pelted with rocks and crowds running off the sidewalks screaming "death to Gypsy scum!" It's dangerous t drive through Kennebunk and not be white -they pull us coloured folks out of cars if we get stopped at a red light. Kennebunk is legendary for being the most white power town in the state of Maine.

One has only to look up the international news reports of the 10 year old school children dragging their black teacher into the streets and almost beating her to death -in 2020. That happened barely a year ago. Kennebunk is the most hostile anti-black town in America and they are proud of it, brag about it, and since the BLM stuff of 2020, Kennebunk has gotten ten times worse. And, she's been seeing all that in the news and wants to live there, and I'm not sure why, because like I said,  my mom is 1/4 black, 1/4 Native American, and 1/2 Gypsy of Roumania/Arabian/Middle Eastern descent and if she tries to buy a house there, and they find out she has black blood, they'll kill her. But she's all hyped up on a white power kick and wants to join Kennebunk's anti-black movement, and... I... I just don't understand it and I'm sure if that's actual why she wants to go thee or not.

There was a court case about the cats (3 different ones because the town hall dropped the case after evidence proved the cats were not mine and my mother had snuck them in my motorhome a few days earlier to try to frame me and then some MB guy crawled out of the woodwork to reopen the case a month later), which, for some reason was in my name, not her name, because the motorhome was mine, even though the cats were hers. Weirdly, half way through the court case the town hall dropped the case and some guy named MB Bureau took over it instead. Thing is, I don't know who this MB guy is. He's not anyone I have ever even met before and he was not at the court so I didn't meet him there either. He came in with lots of wild accusations about me harassing him, even though I had no clue who he was and had never heard of him before. MB's lawyer took photo copies of a conversation on Twitter between me and JB (the guy the FBI arrested for embezzling $30k out of the OOB town hall bank account - $3million in OOB tax money went missing, the rest was never found as far as I know. The Twitter conversation was this JB sending me death threats because he had just been released from prison, and he was claiming I had put him there, even though I didn't know him or that he'd been in prison or that he had stolen money from OOB town hall. According to FBI, JB was a church friend of my mother's and he and town manager Jim Thomas, had been Bishopric counsellors to Mormon Church Bishop DK and the 3 of them and several others from the Saco LDS church had taken over the OOB town hall in around 2010 and embezzled $3million in town taxes. Apparently my Uncle Mervin Bruce Atwater, Richard Merlin Atwater, and aunt B had been involved, been involved and they had used fake social media accounts in my name to contact JB so he thought I knew him, that's why he contacted me on my real account after getting out of prison. I don't know the details I only know the small bit of info the FBI told me to let me know why this JB guy was contacting me.) For some reason, this MB guy, said the Twitter conversation with this Joel guy was about him. 

And apparently according to the FBI, this MB guy owns the old abandoned logging road across the street from me, which is numbered as 139 Portland Ave. I don't know, that road has been abandoned at least since the 1970s, I had no idea any one lived down there, but FBI says this MB guy does. I've been at 146 since 1975, and I've never see any one live there. FBI says there is another driveway on a different side that they probably use. Any ways, for some odd reason this MB guy took over the court case with the cats, only he suddenly said it was about me being transgender (but I'm not transgender, so I don't know why he said I was) His lawyer came into court saying I was a man pretending to be a woman, and here's where it got really weird, the lawyer copied what he SAID was an "About Me" page off of my website (eelkat.com) only what he copied was the about page for the main character of the novel series I write (I'm the author of 138 published novels). The series is about a male Elf who is possessed by a female parasitic alien jellyfish. So it's a female jellyfish wearing the body of a dead male Elf like a coat and passing herself off as him.

Well, this lawyer (Gene Libby) for this MB guy is waving THAT fictional character profile around in court, saying it was my personal about me page, and making the claim that I was a male to female transvestite who believed I was an Elf... and here's the kicker... his whole spiel was trying to convince the judge that I was insane so this MB guy could confiscate my land at 146 Portland Ave! It was the most bizarre thing, and the judge thought so too, because the judge tossed the whole thing out of court because the charges this MB guy had against me were so oddball off the wall nut job ridiculous. But the thing was, again, it was someone making wild claims that I had to hand them over my land, which is what keeps happening with every one of these weird attacks. And always, like both these 2 guys: JB and MB Bureau they are creepy ass strangers who crawl out of the woodwork, people I've never heard of before, making claims to being my friend (JB made the claim he was my best friend and said we talked all the time on FaceBook, but he wasn't on my FB and I'd never heard of him before. While MB Bureau in his court papers made the claim to be one of my uncles -he is not-and)

aunt B and aunt L of Bangor used to be putting stuff online about me and my brothers and JB would get it from aunt B and aunt L and forward it every where. This was in 2010 era, but I did not see the posts, because none of them is a FaceBook friend of me. The FBI however said they saw a lot of the posts, these people made, including several death threats. Seems likely something like that is happening again given the way people keep showing up here at the Biddeford apartment when no one even knew I was here.

I met aunt L about 3 times during my childhood, it's been 30+ years since I last saw her, and I've never spoken with her online or offline not once in my entire life.

aunt B I meet 10 or 12 times during my childhood, and likewise it's been 30+ years since I last saw her, except for 2 times. One in 2013 she showed up at my Biddeford apartment on Water St, with some medical scam idea she had that she wanted me to help her with. She said she was working at Blue Cross/Blue Shield and had found a way to get people's insurance money because a lot of people didn't file claims; she said she was also an EMT, and she could take the records from one job to cross with the other job, to have people's insurance money forwarded to a POBox she owned. I told her I wanted nothing to do with it and to get lost. I don't know how true any of the stuff she said was. I don't know if she worked at those places or could do the scam she was claiming or not.

aunt B showed up again in 2016, at the Gazebo Park (might be named Mechanic's Park?) on the Saco River by the water treatment plant. I was there walking my dog, and my mother showed up with an uncle Peter (now deceased) who was visiting from Utah. They were having a picnic. aunt B and Bruce showed up to trash everything, steal the food, and then leave. They were yelling and screaming the whole time. They acted drunk, except I didn't think they drank. I don't know. Mormons don't drink, not usually.

So I don't know aunt B and aunt L otherwise. I know nothing about them. Have never had contact with them, have never spoken with them online or offline. So, I'm puzzled as to why they were posting things online about me in 2010, or why they were acting like they knew me, when neither of them has ever been a part of my life or know anything about me.

But, they make claims that I say and do various things that I don't say or do. The list of things they've accused me of is massive and kind of crazy and include the claims that I am a prostitute, and that I am a Mafia gang leader ... like I said, it's just wild and also very slanderous and I'm sick of it.

Back in 2019 when my mother got her car, she had it over a month before I even knew she had gotten a car. I found out she had it when she flipped out saying I was online telling people she bought a car. And it turned out is was aunt B and Brucie online telling everyone she got a car, but I had told them,  even thought I had never talked to either of them since 2013 when FBI told me cut off all contact with them

aunt B and Bruce and aunt L all 3 are constantly telling people I said things, that I never said. 

I told you people been showing up talking about Todd and claiming I said things online about him, but I don't even know who he is or what they are talking about. It almost looks like someone is online impersonating me.

A few weeks ago an old man walked up to me, asked if I was EelKat and then asked me why I kept emailing him, and I said I don't email anyone cause I don't use email. He said some days he gets over 300 emails a day from someone claiming to be EelKat 

Last time my car had this problem was same day my father cut the internet on my mom's orders. Suspicious my car has same problem again, same day internet goes off again. It went off while my mother was here

aunt B showed up at water st day after golf club attack, but I never knew how she found out , I never told anyone online about it . Her and Bruce knew about it some how before any one else.  They wanted me to use my injury to help them run a medical scam and they were pissed when I refused to. They started spreading lies about me online because of that. That was Nov 2013

aunt B and Bruce knew about the cats and DAY BEFORE it happened. aunt B posted on my FaceBook wall "the next head nailed to the door will be yours" the day before any heads were nailed to door

I think it's aunt B online saying stuff about me and my mom, because she did it before and because FBI was here asking about her going down to Washington Jan 6 attack, but I didn't yet know the Jan 6 attack had even happened. They said aunt B aunt L and 23 cousins had been down there and they FBI was trying to find them. 

Old Orchard police and Biddeford police and a detective have all shown up asking about aunt B and aunt L and 23 cousins as well. But again I don't know anything because I not had contact with them. But FBI, 2 police departments and a detective are all saying aunt B and aunt L and 23 cousins are making claims about me, in connection to bombs and ISIS .

That's how I found out Paul Martel was in prison. According to FBI agents, Paul Martel built the bombs for the 2013 Boston marathon and the 2013 bomb at South Maine Community College and put the college bomb in my class to make it look like I made the Boston bomb. That's why the FBI showed up to begin with. They were at the college investigating both bombs that happened the same day

FBI said they believed the whole thing was aunt B and Bruce idea, but Paul martial was the one who actually built the bomb and sold it to ISIS, and put the second bomb in my class at college so Paul Martel was the only one they could arrest. FBI is trying to arrest aunt B because they think she's the one behind it. They said the whole thing seems to have started because Scott went to prison for selling drugs at Scarborough downs and for some reason aunt B thinks I'm the one who turned him in, even though I've not seen or heard from Scott since he was 8 years old

FBI thinks the attack on the cats was aunt B retaliating because Paul Martel got arrested. 

When Dickie died also in 2013, after the bomb in Boston but before the golf club attackers aunt B was with him taking charge of his medicine and his official cause of death was an overdose of his medicine, with a not saying unable to determine if accident or suicide. I found out this 2 days after he died when Jacksonville County state police from Florida showed up here in Maine to interview me about where I was the day Dickie died  because when he died aunt B called 911 and told the police I had killed him. 

The FBI thinks the golf club attack was aunt B retaliating because police didn't arrest me for murdering Dickie like she had demanded they do

FBI is full focused on arresting aunt B and Bruce. There's no evidence Bruce is dead. All evidence points to him being in New Zealand. 

FBI believes Bruce faked death because FBI was moving in to close and he didn't want to take the fall for what aunt B is doing 

In 1996 and 1997 aunt B sent out lots of emails to the family claiming the emails had been written by me. I did not have email, internet, or even a computer yet. She got Dickie and David and Joey in raving warpath over it. That's the summer they all showed up talking about Etiole and amphibious aliens and alien abduction. aunt B was the one who started all of that stuff about Etiole, who I never called Etiole. Etiole is not his name, it's always been the word the Atwaters used to describe him (it means man from the stars or alien it's a French word. I don't know French, aunt B is the one who knows French, so I never would have given him a French name) Bruce and Dickie went to a bunch on MUFON forums from 1996 to 2007 spreading lies about me and Etiole calling him a demon and alien and claiming I was an alien abducted. I found out about it in 2007 after they'd already been doing it for 11 years. I don't think aunt B has ever stopped sending out emails about Etiole while pretended to be me, I think she is still doing it.

My father was the one who told the Atwaters about Etiole. My father and Dickie both called him the white monkey. In 1994 and 1996 Bishop Morgan asked me to his office and showed me a bunch of letters, all of them signed "The White Monkey, OST". He said the letters were written to sound like I had written them but he said he'd seen my handwriting before and knew I hadn't written these. He wanted to know if I recognized the handwriting. Some had been written by daddy. Others had been written by Dickie. President Earnshaw later called me in for similar letters he had received and again the white monkey letters were written by mostly daddy and some Dickie all pretending to be me, trying to make it look like I was pretending to be Etiole. In total 16 Bishops and 2 stake presidents had contacted me over the years about white monkey letters

The white monkey letters stopped in 2007 when the psychiatrist at Biddeford hospital diagnosed daddy as having schizophrenia and put him on psychiatric medicine. Since 2007 no one has mentioned Etiole or white monkey, until the week Todd died when people started showing up in Biddeford driveway yelling about Etiole and calling him a suicide demon

The white monkey belonged to Helen pearly and has nothing to do with Etiole at all. In 1978 Helen pearly had a pet white monkey that got lost. Me and cousin Micheal saw it in the woods out back and tried to catch it. We found Etiole the same day. Etiole is a homeless man who lives behind my land in the woods. Me and Micheal took him food. For some reason because we found him while looking for Helen pearly white monkey my father and the Atwaters got it in their heads that Etiole was a demon alien shape shifter who turned into a white monkey to lure me and Micheal into the woods. And that's how their stupid ass alien and demon rumours got started.

I used to let him sleep in the Dodge at night, that's why people started saying the car was haunted. They said Etiole was a demon and the car was demon possessed. My father and Bruce used to stay up all night debating what kind of demon Etiole must be and kept calling me a demon child and a witch and saying I was demon possessed and they called Etiole my familiar and said I summoned him to cast curses and death spells. Bruce believed all that stuff as actual fact and after Bruce left for the night my dad would joke about how gullible Bruce was and how easy it was to convince him demons lived in my car. From there the rumours ended up on the internet through the Heaven's Gate group, that Bruce was a member of at the time. They were a group of around 200 people who went from one UFO forum to the next spreading rumours about me and Etiole. They did that for 11 years before I found out Bruce and his UFO friends were doing it. 

I found out when people started showing up in Old Orchard with beeping equipment claiming they were here the capture Etiole while calling him an amphibious alien and EBE and calling me "EelKat Etiole's friend" I did not use the username EelKat online and none of my books about EelKat (the black bobcat) had ever been published so there was no reason for internet people to know either the name EelKat or Etiole.  I was using the username xavychup online not EelKat, that's why my email address is xavychup not EelKat. EelKat is something Grammy called me back in the 1970s because she said eels and cats were my spirit animals. I never called myself EelKat online or offline so only the Atwaters had ever heard that word before and yet in 2007, I spent the entire summer with endless people showing up in my yard at my tent and all calling me EelKat and all looking for Etiole. 

Because I was living under the tarp I had no access to internet yet so had no clue what was going on online. I went to the library and searched Etiole and EelKat to see what came up and I found tens of thousands of forum posts and interviews and articles all written by Bruce and Dickie, including interviews with Buddy Hopkins, David Mack, and David Icke. All the stuff they said was how they had this demon possessed niece who had been abducted by aliens and has brought an alien back from the mother ship with her and was now protecting him. Every one of the forum posts. Interviews and articles had my full name, my old Orchard address, my email, and my old Orchard phone number listed. That was why so many people were showing up at the tent. In 2006 to 2009. The whole thing of people calling me a Witch and saying about curses and death spells and aliens and demons was started by daddy saying that stuff to Bruce and then Bruce and Dickie spreading it online for 11 years from 1996 to 2007

I started using the name EelKat online BECAUSE my uncles had spent 11 years calling me that on MUFON forums, and when I found out about it and started contacting all the forum admins, I had to tell every one:

"I'm Wendy Christine Allen. I'm the one you all call EelKat, Etiole's friend, the REAL EelKat, friend of the REAL Etiole,  and I'm here to slap every damned one of you with protection from harassment orders. I'm tired of the slander and lies you people are spreading about me of fucking UFO websites. I'm not an alien abductee, I've never claimed to be, until this morning I didn't even know what an alien abductee was. Etiole is not an alien. Etiole is not a demon. He's a local homeless man who has a skin deformity, so he hides in the forest because people are scared of him because of what he looks like, and they beat him up and bully him. The people telling you he's an alien are my uncles, who the ring leaders behind beating him up and bullying him, and I'm quite upset to find out they've been doing it online for quite some time and I'm only just finding out about it now, because earlier this week, I had 30,000 people in my driveway, trying to catch him while screaming that he was an amphibious alien and EBE. You UFO crazies are insane, and I want you people out of my yard. My uncles are lying to you about me and Etiole and you'll idiots for believing them."

I created an EelKat username EVERYWHERE just so I could post that message to every place my uncles had posted that fucking ass alien abduction shit about me and Etiole. THAT, is why you saw me start to use the EelKat username in 2007, when I was always xavychup everywhere before that.

And that is also why I do NOT have an EelKat email.  I've had the xavychup email since 1994, I still have it. And anyone using an eelkat email to contact you isn't me, because I don't have an eelkat email. It always has been and still is xavychup.

Last I knew aunt B and Bruce and aunt L and Bruce's daughters and David's kids and grandchildren were all still continuing to spread demon and alien lies about me and Etiole and were still putting my real name and address on everything. In 2019 they were putting my old Orchard address my high street address and also my water st address even though I was no longer at water street on thousands of forum posts and Facebook posts. In 2019 they were making several hundred posts daily across all there accounts and I found 27 fake EelKat accounts owned just by Bruce himself alone. They were all things like eeelkat, ee1kat, 33lkat, etc. Slightly spell different to look like it was me, yo someone looking quick and not paying attention.  They are likely still doing it and I assume they are doing the same to my mother as well. 

Also I don't even know what mothers address is. How could I put it anywhere? I didn't even know she moved until last summer and apparently she moved a few years ago. No one ever told me she had moved. 

Just like the saying about me saying she got a car. I didn't know about the white car until she came over in it to see Mickey last may and apparently she had a few cars in between. Last car I knew was the black one. I didn't even know she had a new car, let alone more than one.

No one ever told me those things, not her or any one else so it's utterly stupid for her to think I could put her address or cars online. Only people who knew about her address and cars could put them online.

Don't forget she never even told me when Dickie or Bruce died. Both times I found out from the FBI showing up to investigate accusations that I had murdered them

I'm the bed ridden, crippled by multiple attacks. The November 14, 2013 golf club attack, I was almost healed from, but the June 2016 shopping cart attack re opened the 2013 injury and doctors can't operate this time because of the bone shards severing my spinal column. I'm crippled for the rest of my life and no one in this family ever cared. 

Both attacks the FBI wanted to talk to my parents and they refused to talk to him both times. My baby was murdered in the first attack. I was 8 months pregnant and all any of them would do was gibberish about "rosemary baby" and say there was no baby because it was a demon because it was Etiole's. My parents and the Atwaters hate Etiole that much, that they shun the existence of my baby and act like it was never there. That's how much they hate me. That's how cruel and hate filled they are towards me. They spent the last 50 years calling me demon possessed and them saying that is WHY local people attack me and killed my baby and left me crippled for the rest of my life. 

I am in bed 15 or more hours a day, I can barely sit up, I can barely stand up long enough to cook, I have to wear adult diapers since 2013 because half my organs don't work any more because the nerves from those organs to my spine are cut off. My hands shake so bad that it takes me hours to eat a single meal. I can't go back to college, I can't go back to work. But do they care? No. Not my mother. Not my father. Neither of them give a shit. They are both too damned selfish thinking about their own greed to ever once lift a finger to help me. Daddy treats me like a fucking slave and my mother is so far out of my life shunning me because bishop kenning in Saco ward told her too that she hasn't got a clue how bad things are.

I'm not doing a damned thing to any of them. I mind my own business. I write my novels. I don't contact them. I don't talk to them. I don't talk about them.  Someone is clearly pretending to be me online and is slandering me and getting sick of it. My mother flips out about everything thing under the sun and I never have a clue what she's talking about, because I never did or said any of the things she accuses me of. And my father and the Atwaters do the same thing. Some one is out there pretending to be me to get them worked into a frenzy just to sit back and laugh while watching my mother, my father, and the Atwaters be too damned stupid to think. My mother and my father and the Atwaters are all filled with so much pure hatred for me that it takes nothing to convince them to attack me. And whoever it is posting online pretending to be me, knows that and is taking advantage of it. 

I'm too damned sick and crippled to even attempt to do half the crazy shit my mother and my father are accusing me of. And what's worse, my father is right here in the same apartment with me. He sees me every day, he knows how bad off my health is. 

Look how much I'm bleeding all over the house every day. Massive nose bleeds that last for hours to a time, not bleeding from my nose. Just coming out of my nose. I'm so dizzy I can't sit up for weeks to a time. I faint and blackout when I try to get up to go to the bathroom. The pain in my hip and pelvis and knee and spine is so bad I can't even move my fingers to type my novels. 

And look at what they do. Do they really think I'm physically capable of doing the things they accuse me of? They are so damned self centred and paranoid. It's all I can do just to sit up and eat something, how the hell do they think I can do the stuff they accuse me of? My day is spent focusing on trying to get my leg to move so I can make a meal, I don't even have time to think about them. 

It looks more and like my mother and my father are doing this stuff on purpose to try to kill me. My father knows how bad off my heart and lungs are and how difficult it is for me to breath after just a couple of steps. His mother left that land to me in her will in 1983. He stole it, had it put into his name illegally. He's been pissed ever since her death, because she gave everything to me not him. That's been a big problem for him for the last 40 years. He raves about it alongside his ravings about going to Utah taking him off the fire department. He hates my mother because of Utah, blames her every day for losing his fire department pension. He raves about it all night long every single night. He blames me for his mother disinheriting him. He raves about that all the time too. I was only grandchild That's why she left everything to me. Including the land that he stole and put in his name. That land is rightfully mine, his mother gave it to me, and he can't stand it. He's needling my mother about the land just to spite his mother.

He's only trying to get the land away from me because he is mad that the town didn't take it. His mother wanted it to stay in the family. It had been in her family since 1530. Her family was the original settlement family of old Orchard and my land is that spot that the first house in Old Orchard was built.  My father stopped paying taxes to spite his mother and lose the land. He said so many times. He was angry when I bought the land back from the town. He still is. He wants it out of the family because his mother wanted it in the family. That's why he's trying to turn my mother against me over the land. Because he gates his own mother that much.

Keep in mind the 4 door white truck showed up at my workplace daily. Even though I never knew ahead of time what store I would be working at. I was a retail merchandiser and stocked shelves at dozens of stores all over the state. Walmart's every where, CVS, khols, sometimes local, sometimes as far as Freeport and once in Vermont and once in Massachusetts.  I got the notice of which store to be at 15 minutes before I left. So the only person who ever knew where I was going was my father. 

And yet the 4 door white truck would also arrive ahead of me and be waiting. They didn't follow me, they got their first.

And the police caught the truck and the driver in 2017. Kathy BR owned the truck. Her son was the driver.

The smith's are my parents friends. My mother's visiting and home teachers for years.

Kathy was the district emergency dispatch for all the towns in the area, not just old Orchard. That's why none of the 911 calls went through during the attacks by the 4 door white truck. He only attacked while she was on duty. She never forwarded any of the calls so officers never were told to come help me.

That includes the November 14, 2013 golf club attack in South Portland. But the college security officer made a report even though the police never arrived. That big black officer who was head of security was on duty and him and 2 student officers from the police academy made the report.

And FBI found the data from the calls, that never got forwarded to police, that's why Kathy BR lost her job. Because she's the one who tampered with the 911 call files.

Tim and Kathy BR both, not together, individually, arriving separately, both arrived at my tent multiple times throughout the entire year of 2013, saying they were coming to speak to me on behalf of someone who wanted to remain anonymous. So I never knew who sent them. Each time they arrived all they would say was that I had to tear down "the little yellow house" as they called the shop. 

August 8, 2013 the backhoe drove over the shop while I was at work on the food truck down by the pier.

I never saw Tim or Kathy again after that. Not once. And these were people who stopped by to visit my parents daily for over 40 years. Since August 8, 2013 and the backhoe attack on my house, Kathy and Tim have gone to alarming extreme levels to avoid running into me. They just down the street, on one of the private drives, so it's difficult to avoid running into me, and we used to see them a few times a week at local grocery stores. They both, if they see me in a store, literally throw whatever they are carrying across the store and run out of the store like they have a pack of rabid wolves on their heels. It's pretty fascinating thing to see.

My cousin and next door neighbour Tim Murphy was murdered that same week, a few days before the backhoe. His body was left at the cascade Ross road crossroad. 14 days later his head was left at the Portland Ave Ross road crossroad road. His mother put up the big white cross a month later. 

The 4 door white truck showed up a few days later. 

Tim Murphy had an identical truck. The police and FBI initially thought it was his, but his truck was later found.

Tim Murphy owned Etiole's swamp and was the one buying most of the food and supplies for Etiole. 

Tim Murphy was with me and Micheal the day we tried to catch Helen pearly white monkey and found Etiole. 

The FBI believes that Tim Murphy was killed by someone trying to frame Etiole and believes the murder was a retaliation over Tim Murphy refusing to sell the swamp land behind me. 

At the time the FBI was looking at DF Feeney as a suspect but DF Feeney's family was killed in a murder suicide and he too is now seen as someone who was being framed.

The swamp, sandpit, and pond behind me, the Murphys own that, and 3 people in their family have now died horrifically violent deaths because they, like me were protecting Etiole from the people who would kill him because they believed Bruce's demon and alien lies about Etiole. 

Look at what is being done to me. They drove a backhoe over my house and they murdered my baby and they crippled me, all days apart.

Look at what is being done to the Murphys. And they're massacring the Murphy family. Tim's death the same time as the attack on me.

And look at who screams the loudest hate for Etiole. Look WHO calls him a demon.

And look at WHO the FBI's number one suspect in all of this is.

My family laughs and jokes about this whole thing like they think it's a fucking game. People are dying and the FBI is not laughing. 

Look at WHO keeps attacking my car. Look at WHO keeps cutting the wires off the apartment. Vandalism. Harassment. Bullying. Threats. Evil people Evil things. By their fruits yea shall no them, for no good thing springs from dead wood. Those are small petty crimes, but they are still crimes. But it's far beyond petty crimes. The list of people who have been murdered is quite long now. 13 died just at the Boston marathon bombing. I'm crippled for the rest of my life, and so far, I'm the only person who was attacked who lived through an attack. Every one else they've attacked is dead. Most of them beheaded or killed in a bomb. 7 different bombs, including one in my classroom at college in 2013, two in my workplace in 2015 and 2016, the house in Old Orchard in 2006, and my doctor on Saco Ave in 2003 where the doctor the nurses and 21 patients were killed. And the FBI was on site for every one of them, and my family thinks it's funny to laugh and make jokes about all of it. Because that's they do since the day me and Micheal and Tim Murphy found Etiole

Do you realize for all the shit my parents have pulled,  they've never once apologized for anything. And you know why? Because they aren't sorry. They feel no guilt. They feel no shame. They feel no remorse. Why? Because they hate me. They always have. From the time I was old enough to walk both of them reminded me daily that I was supposed to be a boy to replace the baby boy that was born before me. That's why Grammy Helen was the one who was always with me until I was 8. And after that it was Grammy Eva. And then BW. 

Do you know how I found out Santa wasn't real? Grammy Helen died when I was 8. That year for Christmas there were no Christmas presents. There was just my parents arguing over which one of them should have lowered themselves to buy a gift for the mistake that committed the sin of not being born a boy. I remember that Christmas better than any other. Because that's when found out exactly how much my parents hated me and thought I was worthless because I was a girl.

Look at my MRI scans at the damage the foundation nail through my hip did. The mutilated bones that were shattered when I was 6 years old and no one took me to the hospital. I've walked on a broken leg for almost 50 years. 

Look at the jaw surgery I had to have when I was 42 to repair an injury done to me with a brick when I was 14. 

Look at the Gremlin, 1974 orange, obliterated by a sledgehammer. 

Look at what happened when I was awarded phi theta kappa. No one went to the award ceremony. My mother said it was stupid. My father spent the day raving calling me an educated damned fool. BW was at the temple with Rick. And people with golf clubs were waiting at my car.

Do you realize if just one single person had cared enough to be at the phi theta kappa awards my baby might not have been murdered and I might not be crippled now. 

Grammy Helen would beat my dad's ass for the shit he does to me. And Grammy Eva would be ashamed of the stuff my mother does. Neither Helen or Eva would have let them get away with the constant abuse and harassment.

As for what happened to my car March 9, 2022 - KRA vandalized my car and tried to make it look like my brother did it. KRA stuffed the tailpipe full of McDonald's ketchup packets, which is what caused the fuel line to blow up. I could have died. He tried to kill me and make it look like my brother who works at McDonald's did it so my brother would be blamed.

KRA did the same thing in November, because of some guy named Todd who I supposedly convinced to kill himself via may painting a "suicide demon" on my car. There is a picture of Etiole on my car, that is what they are calling "a suicide demon"



UPDATE: February 27, 2022:

Do not underestimate either my willingness or how far I will go to protect my murdered son's grave from being destroyed by the bastards who are the @FBI s number one suspects in having killed him. The ONLY reason that bitch is hell bent on digging up my farm is because she wants to destroy the evidence of my baby having been murdered by golf clubs.

I'm sick of my mother and my mothers shit head Atwater relatives. They won't stop focusing on the cats. They are lost in a delusional refusal to face reality and that is impeding the fbi investigation of the murder of my baby and the crippling of my spine, because all either of them will do is say there was no baby and tell everyone lies about me and I don't like it. My baby is dead and that has nothing to do with the cats and I'm sick of my mother and her filthy Atwater thugs both ignoring what happened at the college 2 years before the cat event happened AND daily arriving to bully me and say it was “RoseMary’s Baby” and not a real baby because it was a demon, because Etiole was a from.

 

Etiole is not a demon, my baby with him was not a demon, you murdered my fucking baby because you are retarded religion crazed jackasses. Get the fuck out of my life and go burn were evil people like you belong!

 

I'm tired of every time I mention the baby that was murdered November 14, 2013 at Southern Maine Community College,  they wave their hand in my face and say, "no you're just upset about the cats". The cats happened May 14, 2015 and those cats were not mine, they were my mother's cats, that she hid in my motorhome because her landlord Nick didn’t know she had 13 cats in her Birch St apartment. And he evicted her a year later when he found out the cats were hers.

That's why SHE is the one making a fuss about them, not me. I'm not the one running around yapping about the cats constantly,  she is. I'm talking about my son. 

 

My baby boy that was murdered by 3 attackers wielding golf clubs in the SMCC parking lot. A blond woman whom the redhaired woman called Claire, a redhaired woman who the blond woman called Kendra, both in their 60sish, and a bald man in his 30ish.

 

I'm not talking about my mother's cats, I'm talking about my child. What the fuck is wrong with these people? 

 

As for my car … did you all forget when and why I painted it? May 12, 2014. Mother's day. The first mother day after my baby was murdered. I painted my Volo on mother's day to divert my mind from killing myself. That's why I painted my car 9 years ago and you all know that, I've said as much hundreds of times.

Ty Mother and the Atwaters are refusing to acknowledge the baby because also refuse to acknowledge Etiole, a local homeless Jewish man who is the baby's father. 

My Mother and the Atwaters are so damned bigoted and religion crazed that all they’ve ever done is call Etiole a demon or an alien, since the first day they ever saw him: September 23, 1978.

It’s been almost 50fucking years that they’ve harassed him because of what he looks like and harassed me because I won’t let them beat him to death. 

They fully 100% believe he is not human and they run around slandering him every chance they can get and they’ve been doing it for 50 fucking years now. 

And THAT is the ONLY reason, they are doing what they are doing right now. 

 

They have NO RIGHT to be on my land. They are fucking trespassing.

Because they are so damned brainwashed by their fucking religions, that they can’t stop believing anyone who is physically deformed MUST be a Demon.

 

And they’ve spent the last 9 years daily hounding me and whooping and cheering joyous celebration over “killing the demon” as they refer to my baby.

 

In you hadn’t watched the local news - January 2022 - there was a massive FBI raid on Main Street and Cutts Street Biddeford, Maine. 8 of the men who have been roaming Southern Maine beating up pregnant women with golf clubs, were arrested and are now in jail where they belong, soon to be moved to federal prison.

And THAT is what has got the Atwaters in a frenzy now, digging up my land in Old Orchard Beach. They are desperately trying to find my dead baby’s unmarked grave, because they know his gold club shattered skull is very damning evidence for them, now that the FBI made a move and started arresting a bunch of their thugs.

 

And those arrested that just happened, they happened because the FBI phone number was painted on my car and locals in Biddeford, came forward with witness testimony of the attacks.

 

What my mother and the Atwaters are doing is cruel and evil and hateful, and I’m sick of it.

They don’t care about or my life, and my baby or his life. As can be seen by the fact of how he died.

The FBI is still trying to ID the bond Claire woman and the redhaired Kendra woman. They caught the bald man with the 4 door white pick up truck, we now know who he is - the son of the Old Orchard Beach police dispatch woman, the woman who would never let any 911 calls begging for help while these attacks were happening, go through.

Don't be surprised if you see the signs - all 144 of them - go back up in my driveway. Because I'm fucking sick of being harassed, and the agreement to keep the signs down, specified that EVERYONE in Old Orchard Beach - ALL RESIDENTS would NEVER HARASS ME again. You people have broken your agreement. I'm painting new signs as we speak.

EVERYONE - includes real estate agents, developers, contractors, construction workers, and any Atwater bitch who thinks they have the right to daily show up at my Biddeford apartment to say: "What are we going to do about Wendy, she can't keep that land, I need a downpayment on a house, she is going to sell her land and give me the money or else!"

Burn in hell you fucking bitch, and take all your fucking Atwater shitheads with you.

There are more then 500 graves on my farm - more than half of them Native American, some of them buried as far back as the 1400s. I WILL NOT let you touch those graves. I take my job as the guardian of these graves VERY SERIOUSLY. And you WILL have an all out war on your hands if you dare touch them.

Now she's threatening to dig up the graves on my land.

My dead baby means a hell of a lot more to me, then her fucking house. She never gave a damn when my baby died, but look at what she did when the cats died. Her priorities are fucked up.

My dead baby means a hell of a lot more to me, then her fucking house. She never gave a damn when my baby was murdered. But look at what she did when the murderers returned and killed the cats!

Look at what she is STILL doing about the fucking cats!

That's all she cares about. Those damned dead cats and her glut lust to have a mansion in KennebunkPort.

Her priorities are fucked up.

She doesn't give a damn about Human life.

And you know what's worse, the FBI thinks she, her sister Barbara, her brother Bruce, and their friends Claire and Kendra, where the people wearing the fake KuKluxKlan robes and hoods on November 14, 2013, when they used golf clubs to beat my baby to death and break my spine leaving me crippled for the rest of my life. 

Her, Barbara, Bruce, Claire, and Kendra - those are the FBI’s #1 suspects in the murder of my baby, November 14, 2013.

And what the hell is with people mixing up me and my mother? 

I'm NOT the one hell bent on a house. I have been willfully homeless for decades I have no desire for the confines of a house. The one running around yapping hysterics about a house IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one talking about cats. The one running around yapping hysterics about cats IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one talking about Todd, I don't even know who Todd is! I don't know any one named Todd! The one running around yapping hysterics about Todd IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one talking about Mark and Dan and Watson, I don't even know who Mark and Dan and Watson are! I don't know anyone named Mark or Watson and the only Dan I know is my cousin and it's clearly not him she's talking about. The one running around yapping hysterics about Mark and Dan and Watson IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one putting curses on people. I don't believe in curses. The one running around yapping hysterics about curses and claiming she's casting death spells on people IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one talking about demons. I don't believe in demons. The one running around yapping hysterics about demons and calling Etiole a demon IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one calling Etiole a demons. I don't believe in demons. Etiole is a local homeless man and Etiole isn't even his name, I don't use his real name online to protect his identity. I'm not the one who calls him Etiole either. Etiole is the name the Atwaters call him. The one running around yapping hysterics about demons and calling Etiole a demon IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one talking about aliens or UFOs or alien abduction. I don't believe in aliens or UFOs or alien abduction. The one running around yapping hysterics about aliens or UFOs or alien abduction IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one calling Etiole an alien. I don't believe in aliens and besides that, Etiole is a local homeless man. The one running around yapping hysterics and calling Etiole an alien IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one talking about Voodoo dolls and Voodoo curses. Voodoo has nothing to do with Voodoo dolls and curses. Voodoo dolls and curses are mumbo-jumbo made up by Hollywood movies and have nothing to do with the Voodoo religion at all. Voodoo is a branch of the Catholic Church. Look it up. Voodoo is a Christian religion. A Voodoo Priest is a type of Catholic Monk. A Voodoo Priestess is a type of Catholic Nun. Voodoo does not cast curses or use voodoo dolls. The one running around yapping hysterics about Voodoo dolls and Voodoo curses IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

Open your eyes people. Me and my mother don't look that much alike. You should be able to tell the difference between me and her.

Stop showing up in my yard to to attack me because of some fucking shit you argued with my mother about.

If you've got a problem with my mother, take it up with her not me.

Her, Barbara, Bruce, Claire, and Kendra - those are the FBI’s #1 suspects in the murder of my baby, November 14, 2013.

No, I have no updates on Etiole.

He was shot, by a local lunatic.

No, he's not okay.

And I am getting sick of this fucking ass rumour of Etiole being an alien or a demon.

The fact of Etiole being an alien is a stupid urban myth started by some crazy ass locals.

The fact of Etiole being a demon is a stupid urban legend created by some religion crazed nuts.

Etiole is an old man covered with acid burns. His skin is white and face disfigured from acid burns. He's not an alien and he's not a demon. And you people who call him an alien and call him a demon, you're all fucking crazy. 

Etiole is a homeless Jewish man who has no skin because he was tortured in a Nazi concentration camp in France during WW2. He came to Maine in 1953 with a bunch of other refugees, He has post traumatic stress disorder really bad and he's terrified of people. He can't function in normal society, so hides in the forests. He's not an alien, he's not a demon, he's not a cryptid. He's a disfigured old man, now in late 90s. He barely get around. He doesn't you people harassing him like this. Why can't you people leave him alone? Why are you all so damned desperate to believe in aliens or demons that you have to harass a helpless old man? Leave him alone. Why can't you leave him alone? What is wrong with you people?

Read The Amphibious Aliens article, https://www.eelkat.com/AmphibiousAliens.html where way back in 2007, I DEBUNKED every one of you stupid ass alien, cryptic, demon, and haunted car rumours. Amphibious Aliens The Story of Etiole and The World's Most Haunted Car, goes over every event from the 1970s, that started the fucking rumour, and lists off how every alien, demon, and haunted car rumour was proven to be nothing but a hoax started by my mother's brother  Mervin Bruce Atwater. Every single one of those rumours was started by that one man, and were proven to ALL be hoaxes he perpetrated to try to get money out of Dr Larochelle, the man who hit Mervin's younger sister with a car. They tried to convince the old doctor his car had a demon living in it and they scammed the doctor out of $20,000 back in the 1970s. THAT is how and why the demon car rumour got started. I bought the car in 1975. Etiole started living in it in 1978. And that is how me and Etiole got dragged into the fucking ass rumours about a demon car.

The article Amphibious Aliens The Story of Etiole and The World's Most Haunted Car DEBUNKS ALL of the alien, cryptid, demon, and haunted car rumours. Every last one of them.

The car is not haunted and Etiole is not a demon.

You people who believe my car is haunted or think that Etiole is a demon, you are all fucking retarded.

You are slandering me!

You are slandering Etiole!

You are slandering my cars!

I'm sick of it!

Grow up and go get a damned fucking brain!

I'm sick of you people harassing me and Etiole over stupid shit started by brain dead idiots.

If you are having problems with my mother, tell FBI agent Andy Drewer about it not me. Have information, call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

Have information about the murder of my baby, call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

Have information about any of the attacks on my family, call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

Have information about the people who shot Etiole, call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

If you have information about anything, call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322 and give it to him, not me.

https://www.eelkat.com/AmphibiousAliens.html





UPDATE March 8, 2022

One sign is back up. 

How many more go up, is dependent upon YOU.

From now on, every time one of you Old Orchard Beach, Pine Point, or Biddeford shitheads decides to harass me, I'm going to put up another sign.

If you want no more, then you better make dammed sure you keep your friends and family and neighbors out of my yard and out of my life. I'm not selling my land, and I'll not let you dig up those graves.

Burn in hell.

No means no.

And I'm tired of saying no.

Just like rapist, you refuse to take no for an answer.

No. I'm not selling my land and giving you the money so you can buy a house in Kennebunk.

I've said no to you every single week since August 2021. And your current threats to dig up the graves on my land and move them to your land, is why the signs are going back up.

I'm tired of you bullying me.

I'm tired of your threats.

I'm tired of your gaslighting.

I'm tired of your lies.

You keep saying "After all I've done for you!" What have you done for me? When I was 8 years old you locked me in a racoon trap and left me there for 27 years, only letting me out on Sundays so you could parade me around in the Cape Elizabeth and Saco Ward Mormon churches to pedophile priests who paid you so they could rape me. That's why you never had a job until 5 years ago, because you made plenty selling your pre-teen daughter for sex to dirty old men.

You drove a foundation nail through my hip when I was 6 years old.

From the tie I was 14 until I was 42 years old I was near mute, because you broke my jaw with a brick. I was 42 when I had surgery to rebuild my jaw, that's why I can talk today.

You never allowed me or my bothers to go to school or doctors.

YOU took a sledge hammer to my 1974 AMC Gremlin, my 1976 AMC Gremlin, my 1976 AMC Hornet, my Olds station wagon, and you took a chain saw to my 1964 Dodge 330 the worlds most haunted car, the real Christine. YOU did that.

Since 1978 you have harassed me and me boyfriend, the one you call Etiole, because YOU believe he's a demon because of his skin deformities. You and your sister and your brothers contacted MUFON and told them lies about me and Etiole both. You called him the amphibious alien and claimed he had abducted me. Your alien abduction hoax, almost got him killed in 1997 and again in 2007 when ufo crazies arrived in my yard calling him an EBE and trying to shoot him "for science". An elderly man, a French, Jewish Nazis concentration camp survivor who lives in the forest because his PTSD and fear of people is so bad. A man who is scarred with acid burns from being tortured in WW2 and is neither a demon nor an alien and who deeply traumatized by YOUR endless harassment.

It was YOUR friends who drove a backhoe over my house August 8, 2013 because YOU paid them $600 to do so. Because you thought without a house I would sell my land. But I wasn't the one living in that house. My dad lived there. All you did was put him in a Biddeford apartment. I was already living in the tent since May 9, 2006, and I had the Biddeford apartment since February 13, 2007. 

It was YOUR friends who attacked me with golf clubs at Southern Maine Community College, November 14, 2013, while I was 8 months pregnant with Etiole's baby. That they murdered, on YOUR orders, because as YOU put it "It's RoseMary's Baby" while you gibbered about some horror movie about demon babies.

That was YOUR own grandchild that YOU hired those people to kill.

April 10, 2015, YOU broke into my motorhome, put YOUR 13 cats in it, them then brought YOUR friends to attack my family.

We now know the owner of the 4-door white truck, was YOUR visiting teach, Kathy, the driver who tried to kill me, was her son, and the reason the 911 calls didn't go through during each attack, was because she was the 911 dispatcher and her son, driving her 4door white pick up truck, only attacked me she was on duty. They were YOUR friends from the Saco Ward church, YOUR church, attacking YOUR daughter on YOUR orders.

Since August 2021, you arrive at my apartment 3 times a week, to tell me I need to put curses on people at your workplace, citing that I have to, because you're my mother and I'm demon possessed and I should be putting my demons to good use by helping you kill three people you don't like at work.

I'm sick of you calling me demon possessed.

I'm sick of you demanding curses.

You have a severe mental problem and you need psychiatric help.

I'm sick of you spreading slanderous lies about me telling every one around town I cast curses and death spells, when I've never done either.

November 19, 2021, YOU friend Todd commit suicide and YOU told YOUR friends, that me and Etiole used suicide demons to drive him in front of a train.

YOUR friend Todd, who I did NOT know and had never heard of until 6 of YOUR friends showed up at Rotary Park November 21, 2021 to gun down Etiole while screaming that they were "killing the suicide demon", while we were walking my dog.

Something YOU now brag that YOU tricked YOUR friends into do, because you needed to get Etiole off my land in order to convince me to sell it and give YOU the money for a down payment on a house in Kennebunk.

Christmas Eve 2021, you arrived at MY apartment in Biddeford, STOLE my father's psychiatric medicine, medicine he needs to keep him NOT violent, because he has extremely violent schizophrenia and one hell of a criminal record that requires him to never be in the same room with a gun, let alone never have one. He was committed to a mental ward in 2007, and they ONLY let him out because he came to Biddeford to live with ME in MY apartment, and I was monitoring his meds.

After YOU stole his medicine, you took him with you daily to Kennebunk, to a mansion by Bush's house, to daily tell him, you would give him that house if he forced me to sell my land and give you the money from my land to buy that Kennebunk house.

Tell, me, what of THOSE things, is YOU doing anything FOR me?

No, means, no.

I'm done saying NO to you.

You are nothing but a land rapist.

Just like a rapist you refuse to accept No for an answer.

Every week since August 2021, I've said no to you.

No, I will not sell my land and hand you the money so you can buy a house in Kennebunk.

No, means no.

And no, I'm not happy with the fact that because I won't sell my land and give you the money, you are now threatening to dig up the graves on my land and move them to your land.

No, I'm not happy with you saying "You don't need the land, you don't use it, I need a house in Kennebunk, you ought to want to sell your land and give me the money!"

Yes, I do use my land.

Yes, I did see the car YOU dumped behind my motorhome. You have till the end of summer to get it off my land or the police are taking it.

What I do with my land is none of your damned business.

And for your information, my land is where I write my novels. I sit on the hill, and I write every day, all summer long. The only reason I didn't in 2021 is because I had Covid for 3 months.

No, telling me that my grandmother's evil spirit is haunting my land. also does not inspire me to want to sell it.

YOU are an evil, hate fill, mean, cruel, sadistic, child abusing, vindictive sociopath.

Get psychiatric help.

You need it.

What you are doing is wrong and you know it. You won't be so upset about what is painted on my car, if you didn't know it.

You can't hide from the truth forever. 

You can't hide your sins, your crimes, your cruelties forever.

Good things will never come to you, until you stop doing evil things to those around you.


Don't forget, my camera runs 24/7 and it's a simple matter of my uploading the video footage of you doing and saying things thing. Plus a lot of it, you said and did while I was livestreaming so people online have already seen and heard you say and do these things.

Yes, I even have video footage of the 4 bicycle brats who chased the homeless man into the train November 2021.

EVERYTHING, I have said here I have video footage of. That is WHY the FBI have been able to arrest so many people these past few months, in Biddeford.

Cutting the wires off our house November 2021 - you did on a livestream. People saw you do it WHILE you were doing it. 

All 2 of the FedEx workers you demanded death curses for - you did on a livestream.

Stealing my dad's meds - you did on a livestream.

Saying "What are we going to do about Wendy, she can't keep that land, I need a house" - you did on a livestream.

Threatening to dig up the graves on my land - you did on a livestream.

All that n-word stuff you said about the black men at your workplace - you did on a livestream.

People been seeing and hearing you live. They've already seen and heard a lot.

How do you plan to explain away all the hundreds of hours of video footage I have of you breaking into my bedroom during a live stream to threaten me, my family, my land?












To the people who asked about weird emails that you claim you got from someone claiming to be me, here are a few things to consider:

#1: I DO NOT use email and I NEVER have. if you get a letter from me it is going to be written in ink on paper, and in a stamped envelope the mail truck delivered to your mailbox at the end of your driveway. Since 1997 my aunt Barbara has been sending emails out to people CLAIMING they were from me, so in all likelihood whatever you got was actually from her. Her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater did the same thing throughout the early 2000s. And 57 of their children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren have done it at well. No, I’m not special. They do this to THOUSANDS of people. They run a medical scam and pretend to be LOTS of big name famous authors, hoping you’ll click whatever link they put in the email, because the link is going to open a .exe phishing program to steal your credit card data and medical records. The FBI is currently investigating their medical fraud, email fraud, scam operation, so if you ARE getting emails claiming to be from me, PLEASE print up the email ad take it to the FBI office on Middle Street in Portland, Maine. FBI Agent Andy Drewer is in charge of not only the investigation of the 2015 murder of my family, but he is also in charge of the email impersonation fraud, and the stalker doing the email fraud.

#2: As you have stated, the topic of the emails is Etiole... do know that I have NEVER talked about Etiole, with ANYONE, online or offline. Unlike my mother, and her sister, my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater, I happen to respect people’s privacy. As I have said before: Etiole is a Jewish, French, Nazi concentration camp refugee who came to Maine in 1953 with a boatload of about 300 other concentration camp survivors. He is covered with acid burns, so his skin looks ghastly white and horrifically disfigured, which is why he lives in the swamps around the Saco River. he is now in his 90s and is still as homeless as he was in the 1950s. He has severe posttraumatic stress disorder, can not speak/is mute, does not have the mental capacity to function in normal society on any level what so ever, and me and a few others have been taking care of him, giving him food and clothing and supplies and medical attention since 1978. There is nothing else you need to know. You do not need to know where he is or how to find him. If you want to see him, go to y livestream/video archive and watch the VOD where I visited him on livestream so you could see what he looked liked and how crippling his metal condition really is.

#3: I feel I shouldn’t have to say this, but apparently I do NEED to say this: Etiole is NOT an alien, nor is he a demon. The article Amphibious Aliens is free to read online. It goes over all the details of both the alien rumours and the demon rumours and debunks them all, while proving all the proof, including medical records and documentation of the people behind the rumour.

#4: The ONLY person who ever claimed I was abducted by aliens was my uncle Mervin Bruce Atwater, who was the leader of the Mane division of Heaven’s Gate for over 40 years. Heaven’s Gate if you do not know, was the UFO suicide cult who murdered 39 people with poisoned Kool-Aid in California in 1997, because Comet HaleBop flew over that night.

#5: I found out about my so-called alien abduction in 2007, when a MUFON tour group showed up in my yard asking to interview me. They carried with them more than a dozen books by various UFO/alien experts and over 100 newspaper articles, all featuring interviews with my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater, interviews all from the 1970s, 1980s, and 1990s, all of them telling of how I was supposedly a demon possessed child, whose best friend was an alien named Etiole. It was 2007, and it was the first time I had ever heard the term “alien abduction” I didn’t even know what it was. The MUFON group - a group of 30,000 people - standing in my driveway 2007 all wanted to interview me as they pointed out NONE of the 30+ years of several hundred interviews with my aunts and uncles, not ONE of the interviews was WITH ME. This was the source of the April 2007 article titled Amphibious Aliens, where I shocked the MUFON world with the revelation that I was NOT an alien abductee, nor had I ever claimed to be one. It also infuriated me to find out that my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater had been running around telling people about Etiole, as I had never told ANYONE - NOT EVEN THEM - about Etiole. It turns out my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater go their alien and demon stories about Etiole from my mother and THIS is WHY I disowned my mother, shun her, and have had nothing to do with her, or her sister my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater, since 2007. The slanderous alien and demon, gossip, rumours, and lies my mother and her sister my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater spread about me and Etiole are deplorable and I HATE my mother and her sister my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater, and I hope they burn in hell for the alien and demon shit they pulled on me and my homeless boyfriend.

#6: That same Amphibious Aliens article ALSO debunks the stupid ass haunted car rumours. My 1964 Dodge 330 is NOT haunted and we fucking proved that. And AGAIN, the haunted car rumour, is sourced to my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater. That car ran over my aunt Barbara when she was 2 years old. At the time, the car belonged to Dr. Larochelle of Ocean Ave Old Orchard Beach, Maine. My than 2-year-old aunt Barbara almost died and her older brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater, came up with a haunted car/demon possession hoax to scam that elderly doctor out of $20,000, which my grandmother Eva Viola Atwater spent on a 3 year trip to Hawaii in 1973. The Atwaters scammed and terrorized the doctor so badly, that he sold the car to me in 1975 for $5 because he was convinced it was attacking people. The car became famous in 1983 when my then neighbour Stephen King used the demon possession story of my car as the basis for his book Christine. He named the car Christine because Christine is my real name and I owned the actual car. Stephen King returned 10 years later in 1994 to film the Thinner movie in my yard, because I’m the real world “Gypsy Witch” (priestess) that he based his fictional Gypsy Witch in Thinner off of. The movies Christine and Thinner are what in turn made ME famous, and started locals accusing me of being a witch with a demon car.

And as for the fucking Thinner movie - those bastards were trespassers. They just showed up unannounced, barged in, set up filming, without permits or licenses or contracts or permission or even telling us ahead of time that they were coming. No one in Stephen King’s crew acted legally, we are not in that movie willingly, they were not on our farm legally, no one ever received a penny for any of it, and to make things worse, Steven King had no right or permission to go o late night television and tell people my home address and tel his fucking fans to “go visit the Thinner Gypsies of Saco Maine”. They had no right to be on my farm, they had no right to be filming my family. They just dropped in one day. We had no clue who they were or why they were there and it took us fucking 5 hours to chase those trespassing bastards and their film crew off our farm.

In short: I don’t use email, so you NEVER got an email from me. I’m not a witch. My car isn’t haunted. Etiole is not a demon. Etiole is also not an alien. And I was never abducted by aliens.

Also, I don’t know what you are talking about with the house stuff. I’m NOT trying to build a house, I’ve NEVER tried to build a house, I have never applied for a house permit, I’ve never been denied for a house permit because I’ve never even tried to get one. You clearly have me mixed up with someone else.

I’m at 146 Portland Ave. I have 2 neighbours who are building a house: 144 Portland Ave next door to me and 139 Portland Ave across the street from me. I think you mean one of them. My neighbour at 144, has been trying to build a house for 17 years and the town hall has been giving them the runaround. I think SHE at 144 Portland Ave is the one you mean, not me at 146. You seem to have us mixed up somehow.

SHE at 144 is the one putting in a septic system, not me at 146. I’m the one with the pink motorhome and the 35-year-old black Volvo. she’s the one with the brand new big black car and the log cabin house.

You have seriously mixed the two of us up big time.

Understandable considering it was HER family at 144 fighting with the Cyr Clan over a septic tank in 2014, and the Cyr Clan hired a hitman who accidentally murdered MY children, ten of them and nailed their heads to my motorhome door, at 146 than the white-haired man with the green pick-up truck has spent the last 7 years TELLING YOU via running up the street knocking on doors, tell you that it was EelKat trying to build a house, ONLY telling you that to try to cover his ass for mixing up my children at 146 when it was my neighbours children at 144 that was the ACTUAL target.

This is not speculation, the FBI have 100% positive proof that she and her children, not me and my children were the intended target because her family was having a fight with some Connecticut based heroin drug gang that calls itself the Cyr Clan over the septic tank. The hit men the Cyr Clan hire got the wrong house when they murdered my family. And now the Cyr Clan’s trying to convince you that I was the one building a house. I have no interest in a house. Why would I? I’m a Gypsy, I’ve never lived in a house. I’ve always lived in cars and tents my whole life. I have no interest in a house on any level whatsoever. I don’t NEED one, I never have. And you local people should know that. When my health is bad, I rent apartments in Biddeford. I’ve done this for 50 years now. You know that. You ALL know that. I’ve owned 146 Portland Ave since 1975. You people know me. Why are you pretending you don’t?

I’m the feral child who lived in a cage in a woodshed from the time I was 8 until I was 31. Did you all forget that? Etiole was the local homeless man who used to break into the woodshed and break the lock off the cage and take me out into the swamp to hide me from my bastard uncles. Did you forget that too? The ONLY reason any of you spread your fucking rumours and lies about me and Etiole, calling me a witch and Etiole a demon or alien, and spreading lies about me building houses, is because my Uncle Bruce and his Heaven’s Gate friends, told you those lies.

Did you forget what Heaven’s Gate is, what they fucking did? They are an UFO Alien Cult, who murdered 39 people with poisoned koolaid, because they comet Hale Bop was God’s fucking mother ship. They see fucking aliens EVERYWHERE. In everything. And THEY are the ones who started the stupid ass rumour of Etiole being an alien.

Look at the SOURCE of the alien abduction rumour. My Uncle Mervin Bruce Atwater. One of George Applewhite’s thugs. George Applewhite, a follower of Jim Jones, that’s WHY they killed everyone with kool-aid, because they were fans of Jim Jones, and they wanted to jump onboard God’s mothership like Jonestown did! Did you forget that? THAT fucking lunatic, a fan of Jim Jones, who worked for George Applewhite, called Etiole an alien, because Bruce CALLED EVERYONE aliens.

Bruce locked me in a cage, and Etiole broke me out of it and hide me in the swamps, and THAT is what Bruce called an alien abduction. But Etiole is no alien. He’s just a local homeless man. Etiole’s not even his name. I don’t tell anyone his name to protect him from you fucking jackasses who are too stupid to believe he’s just a normal man. My uncle Buce is a fucking lunatic who spends 24 hours a day gibbering madness and nonsense about aliens and demons.

As for the garbage that keeps being dumped on my land… you have all SEEN the big green dump truck with the black and silver striped nose, that illegally trespasses on my land and dumps that fucking garbage.

Open your eyes and look around. You can SEE the truth. The house being built is at 144 Portland Ave NOT 146. You can SEE that, now that the house is up.

Like I’ve been saying right along, it is NOT me building a house. It NEVER has been. I don’t know why you let that idiot try to gaslight you with lies about me building a house, when you can SEE the house is NOT going up on MY land. It’s going up on my NEIGHBOUR’S land.

I know you people are NOT THAT stupid. The white-haired man with the green pickup truck is LYING to you, and you can SEE that for yourselves, just by looking at WHICH property the house is being built on.

Look around... does it LOOK like there is a house being built at 146 Portland Ave where the pink motorhome is? Use your brain and open your eyes. See the truth. The truth will set you free.

Now look next door to 144, you CAN SEE that THEY NOT ME are the one building a house, now that it’s almost finished.

I’d say the white-haired man in the green pickup truck has a lot of explaining to do, like explaining WHY h’s hell bent on trying to convince the town I’m the one putting up a house, when I’ve never even applied for a building permit. Building permits are public record. Go look at the town hall for yourself.

Also, please explain to me HOW the white-haired man with the green pick truck has such very detailed info about the murder of my family, when the records are sealed, not public access, and about 90% of the details were withheld from the public and are know ONLY to myself, the murderer, the police, and FBI? There is ZERO public access to the stuff h is saying happened on April 10, 2015... you know that, right? So HOW did he get the info he has? Explain THAT.

please report any future such emails you receive to FBI agent Andy Drewer 207-774-9322

>>>I’m just more cowardly than they are and I’m afraid of the truth and criticism. In your opinion, what makes someone mean?

When I think of mean, I think of my uncles. 3 in particular. My mother had 12 older brothers and 3 of them all claimed to be “king” (we are Gypsies, Gypsy Kings are a thing). And they fought over it badly. They ended up jointly ruling over the clan, each competing with each other to out-king the other, each doing progressively meaner things to the clan members, especially the female children.

Things they did, just to me, included:

When I was 4 Uncle Bruce stabbed me with a foundation nail - an iron rod over 2 feet long - he drove into my hip, through my pelvis and out my other thigh. I have been crippled and walked with a cane since I was a toddler, because of it. His reason? I was unable to memorize the entirety of chapter 1 of the book of Genesis.

When I was 8 years old, same uncle locked me in a cage that was made for trapping raccoons. He gave me 1 salted herring fish to eat once every 12 days. He let me out only on Sundays to go to church. I lived in that cage for 27 years, until the Heaven’s Gate FBI raid shut down Heaven’s Gate in 1997, after they killed 39 people with Kool-aid. Yes, I am THAT EelKat, the child who lived in a cage, the feral child you see pictures of in almost every college Psychology book. I am the child who survived Heaven’s Gate because I was locked in a cage in a woodshed when they drank their kool aid under the shadow of comet HaleBop. I was 31 years old when the FBI raid rescued me from that cage.

When I was 14 years old, because I was unable to recite from memory the entire book, all chapters of Ecclesiastes, that same uncle beat me in the face with a cinder block brick, breaking my jaw, and cause me to be “mute” until had surgery to fix my jaw when I was 42 years old. From the time I was 14 until 42, I was unable to speak due to the damage of my jaw.

In those 27 years from age 8 to age 31, I was let out of the cage every Sunday to be taken to church and sold or $12k to the priests, who raped me repeatedly, weekly, for 27 years.

While my uncle helped Applewhite to run Heaven’s Gate, he fled the night of Hale Bop. He did not kill himself with everyone else.

Social workers took me after the FBI raid. It took them years to teach me how to not be terrified by the sight of Humans. They say I suffer from having no outward sign of emotions, and that it was caused by my never having experienced a single good event in my early life.

At the time of the FBI raid at 144, 146, and 148 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, I was one of more than 120 girls the FBI rescued out of cages. All of whom had been raped hundreds of times by priests from Cape Elizabeth, Saco, and Sanford wards of the LDS/Mormon church. Including 16 bishops, an OOB town manager, and several OOB motel owners, all of whom were in the habit of paying $12k to rape girls under the age of 10 years old.

The man with the green truck, who likes to spread rumours about me and Etiole and my house, was one of Bruce’s top customers. He had a thing for numbers and raped 7-year-olds, 14-year-olds, and 21-year-olds because he was obsessed with doing everything in 7s.

After years of social workers teaching me how to live with normal, not abusive Humans. I was 37 when I got my GED and while I was at the high school doing that, those uncles built a grease fryer bomb burned my house down to punish me for getting a GED.

2 years later, while I was in college taking classes to learn grammar and writing, three of them, that same uncle and 2 women I had never seen before, arrived at the college armed with golf clubs and attacked me when I was coming out of the college. I was 8 months pregnant at the time. They killed my baby, broke my spine, broke my hip, broke my pelvis, broke my knees. I was paralyzed for 5 months. It took me 18 months to get out of the wheelchair and relearn to walk, and to this day I am still crippled.

That’s the price I paid to learn how to read and write, in a culture that believes it is okay to execute women who commit the sin of learning how to write.

August 8, 2013, that same uncle paid a local construction worker $600 to drive a backhoe over my house.

April 10, 2015, that same uncle and a group of 74 members of the new reorganized Heaven’s Gate, attacked my farm. 14 men held me down with guns to my head, while the others used hand band saws to kill and behead 10 of my 12 children and then nailed their heads to my door.

And it’s very easy to Google the news reports and photos of all of it.

That is what I think of when I hear the word “mean”. My uncle Bruce was a very mean person.

My uncle Bruce Mervin Atwater is a monster. And he calls EVERYONE an alien abductee or a demon. Did you fucking forget that?

No, I have no updates on Etiole.

He was shot by a local lunatic.

No, he’s not okay.

And I am getting sick of this fucking ass rumour of Etiole being an alien or a demon.

The fact of Etiole being an alien is a stupid urban myth started by some crazy ass locals.

The fact of Etiole being a demon is a stupid urban legend created by some religion crazed nuts.

Etiole is an old man covered with acid burns. His skin is white and face disfigured from acid burns. He’s not an alien, and he’s not a demon. And you people who call him an alien and call him a demon, you’re all fucking crazy.

Etiole is a homeless Jewish man who has no skin because they tortured him in a Nazi concentration camp in France during WW2. He came to Maine in 1953 with a bunch of other refugees. He has posttraumatic stress disorder really bad and he’s terrified of people. He can’t function in normal society, so hides in the forests. He’s not an alien, he’s not a demon, he’s not a cryptid. He’s a disfigured old man, now in late 90s. He barely get around. He doesn’t you people harassing him like this. Why can’t you people leave him alone? Why are you all so damned desperate to believe in aliens or demons that you have to harass a helpless old man? Leave him alone. Why can’t you leave him alone? What is wrong with you people?

Read The Amphibious Aliens article, where back in 2007, I DEBUNKED every one of you stupid ass alien, cryptic, demon, and haunted car rumours. Amphibious Aliens The Story of Etiole and The World’s Most Haunted Car, goes over every even from the 1970s, that started the fucking rumour, and lists off how every alien, demon, and haunted car rumour was proven to be nothing but a hoax started by Mervin Bruce Atwater. Every single one of those rumours was started by that one man, and were proven to ALL be hoaxes he perpetrated to try to get money out of Dr Larochelle, the man who hit Mervin’s younger sister with a car. They tried to convince the old doctor his car had a demon living in it and they scammed the doctor out of $20,000 back in the 1970s. THAT is how and why the demon car rumour got started. I bought the car in 1975. Etiole started living in it in 1978. And that is how me and Etiole got dragged into the fucking ass rumours about a demon car.

The article Amphibious Aliens The Story of Etiole and The World’s Most Haunted Car DEBUNKS ALL of the alien, cryptid, demon, and haunted car rumours. Every last one of them.

The car is not haunted and Etiole is not a demon.

You people who believe my car is haunted or think that Etiole is a demon, you are all fucking retarded.

You are slandering me!

You are slandering Etiole!

You are slandering my cars!

I’m sick of it!

Grow up and go get a damned fucking brain!

I’m sick of you people harassing me and Etiole over stupid shit started by brain dead idiots.

And the same goes for the so-called World’s Most Haunted Car. That rumour was started by the same person. That car was proved years ago, to have a mechanical issue that caused it to start and drive ahead until it hit something. No one ever thought to look at the starter. I’m the 3rd owner of the car. I changed the malfunctioning starter and a so called ‘haunted” stuff the car did, went away. It was a problem with the starter, only that and nothing more.

And these people in Biddeford right now, getting you all worked up - if you hadn’t noticed they ARE Mervin Bruce Atwater’s family.

So it’s STILL the same one fucking person running around getting things stirred up. The Atwaters. My fucking uncles. Like usual.

Yesterday at Rotary Park, Biddeford, Maine, a group of people armed with rifles, went down the track team trail behind the soccer field and started shooting... scared the crap out of the 50 or so children and their 100+ parents, got the 30+ dogs in the dog park howling... the sky filled with thousands of Canadian geese, and the park goers assumed the group was hunting geese and started commenting on the fact that hunting was not allowed in Rotary Park.

A few minutes later, a grey/white haired, bearded man, who looks a lot like Kenny Rogers, but not as fat, with a black dog of a German Shepard-Lab mix look, and a woman with pageboy greyish-blond hair, both about late 60s, marched up to me in the park, bragged they had killed Etiole, stating that he has caused their son whom they called “Todd” to jump in front of a train 3 days earlier.

You know what, I knew that homeless man and HE never mentioned it.

You people are just looking for someone to blame, and think because I’m not white, I wear a hijab, and I have a mural painting on my car, you think you are justified on pointing blame at me for something I had no part in.

That homeless man was obsessed with the fact that his dog and son had been taken away from him.

It’s NOT the evil eye as they called it. It’s The eye of The Grigori Archangels aka The Watchers, from the Apocrypha in the Bible. It’s the blue wings of the Seraphim Archangels aka The Watchers. The Watchers are my Guardian angels. I paint them on everything, I sew it on tapestries, it’s on my car, my motorhome, I embroider it on pillows and clothes, paint it on mirrors, paint canvases art for art galleries with it. It’s the blue eyes wings of the archangels as described in the Bible. I’m not sure why they were calling it the Evil Eye.

It’s the Eye of God, the hamsa. A Jewish protection symbol. Etiole’s Jewish, he draws it on everything, so that’s why I do as well.

I’m sick of you jackasses spreading you wild ass rumours about me.

You’re nothing but a bunch of trouble making busy bodies who can’t mind your own fucking business.

I’m not bothering a single damned one of you, so why the fuck are you bothering me?

Why can’t you stupid ass people leave me alone?

There is no reason for a damned one of you to be in my yard.

There is no reason for a damned one of you to be chasing down Etiole.

There is no reason for a damned one of you to be having psychotic meltdowns over my car!

What is wrong with you people?

Fucking brain dead herd mentality that’s all this is.

One of you ran around screaming like a lunatic and rest of you all decided to join in.

But I also ask... WHY would you be scared of me or Etiole? It makes me ask who has been feeding you lies about me? Who has been feeding you lies about Etiole?

I am a crippled elderly woman. I can barely stand up. I’ve been paralyzed and bedridden since the golf club attack November 14, 2013. I’m only just now in 2021 just starting to walk again, and I can barely do that. I have no grip strength so I struggle to even hold me cane. The golf clubs damaged my spine, my nerves, most of my organs don’t function because of the nerve damage to my spine. I struggle to even breath, just sitting up in bed is enough to collapse my lungs. I have no bladder or bowel movement control, I have to wear diapers. What exactly is it you think I can even do?

And Etiole? The old hermit Nazi concentration camp survivor? He’s over 100 years old now, he hasn’t been able to walk, or sit up, or eat on his own, in almost 20 years. He’s dying. What exactly are you expecting him to do?

Etiole is NOT an alien.

Etiole is not a demon.

I am not a witch.

None of my cars are haunted.

I’ve been saying it for years. Why won’t you listen to me?

You are slandering me!

You are slandering Etiole!

You are slandering my cars!

I’m sick of it!

Grow up and go get a damned fucking brain!

I’m sick of you calling Etiole a demon.

I’m sick of you calling Etiole an alien.

I’m sick of you calling me a witch.

I’m sick of you saying one car after another is haunted.

This whole thing boils down to your fucking white privilege. You know that right?

Your white ass can’t stand the fact that we non-white Gypsies live here, so you have to make up stupid ass supernatural spooky shit about us.

You don’t like that I wear the traditional dress of my people instead of dressing like an American, so you feel justified in calling me a witch and making up spook occult lies about me.

I wear hijab and veils and caftan and silk and it bother’s you that I’m not scum diving in trashy t shirts and jeans like the rest of you.

I paint my cars, same as we painted our wagons and vardos for centuries, and it bothers you because it looks different.

Etiole is a Jew, and your anti-Semite white privilege kicks in to hate him for being born Jewish.

Etiole has scars, so you’re scared of him

I’m different.

Etiole’s different.

My cars are different.

And when you get right down to it, that’s ALL any of this is about.

Me, Etiole, and my cars don’t fit in with your fucking ass white privileged ideas of “normal” and that makes you uncomfortable and you try to make the uncomfortable go away by dehumanizing us with your stupid ass rumours.

There are no witches.

There are no aliens.

There are no demons.

There are just a bunch of whinny ass white privileged brats running around making trouble for anyone who’s not white enough for them.

Grow the fuck up!

EelKat's Secrets To Squidoo Success



IMPORTANT NOTE:

Squidoo went out of business in 2013.

This article is over 10 years old.

The SEO advice in this article was aimed at driving traffic to Squidoo specifically, and therefore may not work for blogs or self hosted sites.

Also this article was written several years before Google's 2011 invention of Panda. Some advice in this article may be contrary to current trends.

Please keep in mind that this article is very, very, very old and very outdated and I am only leaving it up for archive purposes.

Some advice may still be viable now this decade later after Panda, but others may not. Please do research into the current standards regarding each method listed here, before trying them on your own blog or site.


Note - this page contains the original links to the original Squidoo articles. Clicking the links will only take you to Squidoo's 404 page on the HubPages website.

Most of the articles mentioned, are here on EelKat.com and can be found via the Site Index or Search feature. Ones not yet moved to here, will be soon.

I will be rewriting this article soon (Today is November 14, 2017) updating the info and links to the current standards of SEO and the current urls of the articles. This original article will stay up as is, the new one will be on a different page. 

EelKat's Secrets To Squidoo Success

On April 17, 2007 I joined Squidoo and had no idea what I was doing. Now on April 17, 2008 I have gained Giant Squid status, had lenses reach the coveted Top 100 List, and am making enough of a steady income to run the Pidgie Fund on my Squidoo income alone! Over the past four or five months, I have gotten several emails from new comers seeking my advice on how I got where I am today, and how they can do it too.

Well, I do not consider myself an expert at Squidoo. The way I see it, I'm still learning the ropes myself. There are others who have been here longer and have done way more than I have. But, that is no reason why I can't tell folks what it is I do. Maybe in trying to teach others, I will become even better at this as well? Who knows. Anyways, I now bring to you this lens, where I well discuss and debate on the things I do with Squidoo, and you can read it and see if anything here, helps you out. I have chosen to write this in a question and answer interview format, as I find it easier to write up my answers this way. Hopefully you will find it useful in your own quest for higher Squidome.

Contents at a Glance

  1. Why Did You Join Squidoo?
  2. What Do You Like Best About Squidoo?
  3. Are You REALLY Making Money Via Squidoo?
  4. Which of Your Lenses Brings in The Most...
  5. Are There Other Ways To Make Money With...
  6. Money Making Success Stories Of Others

More

EelKat's Little Black Book of Secrets

A Look at My Life As a Squid

Why Did You Join Squidoo?

Once upon a time, long ago and far away, in August of 1997 I joined the new found craze of geeks everywhere, and joined the internet. My first visit was to Yahoo, where I set up my email account . . . the very same email account I still use today 11 years later. My next move was to eBay, quickly followed by Amazon. I became known to the world as EelKat, the cartoon watching, comic book crazed, Disney fanatic, Uncle Scrooge obsessed, forum posting maniac who joined new forums weekly and posted 5,000 word rants at a rate of 20 to 30 a day on EACH of the forums. In less than 2 months I had my own fan following. In less than 6 months I had my own stalker and had to contact the FBI as a result to get rid of him.

In 2004 I discovered five new sites to join: Fanlisting.org, Freewebs.com, Proboards.com, Blogspot.com, and Wordpress.com. With the help of these five websites, my manic chatroom-message board posting hobby became over night my #1 source of income, as I set out to no longer joining message boards, but now building them instead. Soon I owned 32 blogs, 13 forums, 24 fanlistings, and nearly 300 individual FreeWebs hosted websites.

It was on April 17, 2007, while using Freewebs.com to create yet another fanlisting, that I ran across Squidoo, quite by accident. I was seeking info for the fanlisting site I was building, and Google's #1 search result had lead me to a Squidoo lens.

It was love at first sight.

Squidoo was like taking a Freewebs site and crossing it with a Blogger Blog, than throwing in a discussion board on it to boot. I knew in an instant that this was the place for me, and less than 10 minutes later I was building my first lens. By the end of the day I had 15 lenses, and the rest was history, I have never looked back.

What Do You Like Best About Squidoo?

Obviously I love Squidoo. I mean, I've got 313 lenses, and you can't have 313 of something and not like it right? But what do I like best of all? Well, let's see . . .


  • I love the fact that I can pick a topic, any topic, and I can write everything I know about that topic and just pour my heart and soul into it.
  • I love the whole creative high I get from spending hours in creating my content, and than finally getting to see it published for anyone in the entire world to read!
  • I can't deny that I love the monthly pay days I get from Squidoo!
  • I love that I have meet a ton of great folks through Squidoo and SquidU and that the lensmasters here can just sit back and chat with each other about absolutely anything.
  • I love that the people who run Squidoo are real people who you can contact and talk too when ever there is a problem, and that they are super quick to respond, usually answering your questions within a few hours.
  • There is only one word to describe Squidoo: FUN!

What is it about Squidoo that has caused you to stick around?

uhm . . . I don't know. I just plain have more fun here than on any other website I have ever visited, so I spend most of my online time here now.


I love to talk/write about things I know, and I love sharing ideas and info with other people. Squidoo allows me to do that with a limitless abandon. I can write about anything I want to, when ever I want to, in whatever way I want to, and I can do it any time night or day.


I just love Squidoo, and so I keep coming back day after day, month after month.


Are You REALLY Making Money Via Squidoo?

When I first joined I didn't know you could make money on Squidoo. I came here to build lenses and share my knowledge about my favorite subjects. Than I learned I could make money doing something I loved doing: writing about my hobbies, so now I have made I my goal to make a regular and steady income here.

My goal is to get $458 a month, in direct payout from Squidoo.com (NOT including off-site affiliate incomes) and to keep that amount rising higher as the months and years go by.



  • SQUIDOO INCOME UPDATES:

  • From April to September 2007 my income from my Squidoo lenses ranged from $5 to $12 per month.

  • Since October 2007, I have not made less than $24 per month.

  • As of February 18, 2008 I am happy to announce that my monthly income from Squidoo, now ranges from $24 to $37 per month! WOO-HOO!

  • The April 2008 PayOut adds yet another payout milestone for me, with $62.88! Nearly double the average I had been getting.

  • May 2008 payouts just came through with a total of $94.06 for me! My pay is still going up each month!

I love watching those numbers rise!

UPDATE: February 15, 2009

Well, what do you know, a year has past since I first created this lens and I'm now ranked as one of Squidoo's highest paid lensmasters! (I got an email telling me so!) YAY! And me just 2 months away from my 3rd year here. Cool! The drawback? I now have to pay taxes. Just got my 1099 from Squidoo. Oh well. This year I made more money on Squidoo, than I made last year working at Macy's. Wow! I'm floored! If it keeps going like this, I may never have to work offline again!

Which of Your Lenses Brings in The Most Money?

I have 5 lenses that bring in high affiliate sales each month since the first week I created each of them. (Sales coming from the Amazon and eBay modules). They are:

  • How to Start a Publishing Company
  • How to start a publishing company: I started my own small press publishing company. With the help of companies like LuLu and Kindle, it's now easier than ever...
  • Ten Best Vincent Price Films
  • This lens is devoted to reviewing what I consider to be the ten best Vincent Price movies ever made. Ten movies; Twenty hours of great movie viewing. Why not...
  • Serj Tankian
  • What do you get when you take hard core punk metal, throw in a grand piano, and start an anti war protest? Why Serj Tankian of course! Here is a lens devoted...
  • The Self-Publishing Manual by Dan Poynter
  • The Self-Publishing Manual is the most complete book ever written on the art of starting and maintaining a full time career as a self publisher. This is the...
  • Your First Goldfish
  • I love goldfish. They are such wonderful pets. This lens is for anyone who loves goldfish too, but was created specifically for those just getting started.

Are There Other Ways To Make Money With Squidoo?Making Money Via Squidoo Other Than From Squidoo

The figures listed in the section above are only the PayOut figures from my payments, made to me by Squidoo themselves; this is NOT however the only money my Squidoo lenses bring in.

Most of the money I make from my Squidoo lenses does not actually get paid to me by Squidoo!

Zazzle.com is where most of my "Squidoo income" comes from. I have been a Zazzler since December 2004. I am and always was an artist. I paint animals, dogs, cats, roosters, birds, flamingos, peacocks, goldfish, eels, and more using watercolors, acrylics, pastels, pen & ink, and digital media. I also illustrate books. To add to the mix I am a costumer and fashion designer, and do a lot of figure art as well for that. All in all, art is a very major part of my life.

What does me being an artist have to do with making money via Squidoo? I sell prints of my art via Zazzle. I sell T-shirts, greeting cards, mugs, mouse pads, magnets, buttons, Christmas ornaments, tote bags, and more all featuring my art on them. I have more than 20 Squidoo lenses that do nothing but promote my art for sale on Zazzle! About 65% of my lenses have at least one link on them to at least one of my products for sale on Zazzle. I make $40 - $120 a month from Zazzle via sales of my products off my Squidoo Lenses.

After Zazzle, my second biggest non-Squidoo Squidoo income comes from CafePress. Like Zazzle, I have been a member of CafePress since December of 2004. I joined them both the same day. Like Zazzle, I sell my art on various products.

Cafepress is different from Zazzle in that, Squidoo has a CafePress module which allows me to promote my CafePress items using that feature. Via CafePress I bring in about $70 per payout, which is about 3 times a year.

UPDATE: November 2008:

There is now a Zazzle module, meaning that I not only can sell my Zazzle products, but can make Squidoo affiliate sales as well by featuring my products on my lenses via the module! Yay!


So What Do You Spend Your Squidoo Money On?

When I'm not on Squidoo building lenses I'm usually doing this:

  • The Pidgie Fund
  • Nearly 250 Squidoo lenses donate money to The Pidgie Fund, but what exactly is The Pidgie Fund? The Pidgie Fund is a non-profit organization which raises money...
  • How Much Did It Cost?
  • I have been asked a few times now, how much is it costing me to make my insanely elaborate, historically accurate, "Hollywood movie quality" Lord Sesshomaru...
  • Your First Goldfish
  • I love goldfish. They are such wonderful pets. This lens is for anyone who loves goldfish too, but was created specifically for those just getting started.

Money Making Success Stories Of Others

SquidBlog: One Lens, One Month, One Thousand Dollars

One Lens, One Month, One Thousand Dollars

I heard some pretty cool news recently from superlensmaster Loyalis, the self-styled Captain Squid.

He made $1,000 from just one Squidoo lens in one month. . .

Can You Guess Why This Picture Is Here?


What Is Your Secret To Lens Success?

By April 2008, I had built more than 240 lenses, was listed on Squidoo's Top 10 Lensmasters (September 2007), have had lenses placed in Squidoo's Top 100, and have won Squidoo's The Giant Squid Award:

(On May 16, 2008, my name was added to Squidoo's Top 100 Most Rated Lensmasters! My name entered the list at #94!)

I have created several top ranking lenses, 4 of which are currently in the Squidoo top 1,000 and one that not only made it to the top 100 it made it all the way to #32! So, what is my secret to building high-ranking lenses that sweep in money?


  • Content. Lots of it!

  • Love of my topic, overflowing with a rabid obsession for my hobbies and the desire to share my knowledge with others.

  • Money Making Modules staggered throughout instead on all in one place.

  • Don't focus on making money.

  • Give your readers a break.

  • Lots of links to topic related web-sites.

  • Big lenses.


Focus on content.

Your readers want a unique point of view about topics they enjoy. What are you passionate about? What do you have expertise in? THAT is what you should write about. Just write good content. People like that. Write about what you know and your readers well love you for it. The more you write, the more folks will keep coming back to read what you wrote. Don't be afraid to let your lens get really long. Love your topic and talk about it!

Don't focus on making money.

Focus on informing your readers. If you focus on making money, your readers well know it, and they probably won't stay on your lens too long. Squidoo is filled with spammy money-making lenses owned by folks wondering why their lenses aren't making any money. Well, I ask you: What content have they included to attract readers? The answer: none. Readers don't care if you make money or not, they want to know what you have to say about your chosen topic. Love your topic!

Give your readers a break.

I mix my personal text content with both Money Maker Modules (Amazon, CafePress, & eBay being my top 3 faves!) and non-money making modules (Polaroid, BlackBox, and Polls, being the 3 I used most) . Think of it as a TV show: Your written text is the show, and the Money Making Modules are the commercials that pay for the show. The non-Money Maker Modules add color and hook reader interest.

Make sure the Money Makers are on topic though. If you are talking about Harry Potter characters, than put Harry Potter books on your Amazon module and Harry Potter action figures on your eBay module. If you are writing a bead-work how-to lens, than put bead craft books and seed beads on your eBay module.

Share the link love!

Are you writing about self-publishing? Than add a link list to your personal fave printers, like LuLu.com. Even if the links don't make money for you, your readers well enjoy it. Your reader want to find what they are looking for, and if you help them find it, they well come back to your lens again and again, and they well tell their friends about it. And keeping your readers coming back for more is the real secret to making money through Squidoo.

Keeping on sharing the link love and send readers to your other lenses. The more of your lenses they read, the better your chances are of making a sale!

Share the link love a little bit more: feature some on-topic lenses built by other lensmasters. No need to be stingy, there are enough visitors to go around, so why not send your readers to read the lenses you enjoyed reading yourself?

UPDATE ADDED: February 15, 2009:

The side effects of linking out to others on my lenses! OMG! They started linking back!

While I haven't had much success getting traffic from Digg (I get maybe 4 visits total from each submission to Digg), I have had very good luck with YahooAnswers. The funny thing about that is, I'm not the one posting links to my lenses at YahooAnswers! Several of my highest ranked lenses (including on that made it to #32 on the top 100 list in 2007) got their high rankings after someone answered a question on YA and than told the question asker that they had found their answer on one of my lenses than added it's link as a reference! I only found out this was happening when I checked my stats and found that a lot of my traffic was coming from YA, (which I had never heard of at the time) so I went to YA to find out what it was and why my traffic was coming from their and I found several questions linking back to several of my lenses. I was amazed!

YahooAnswers is not the only case of this happening however, another site, AnswerBag has been sending me traffic quite regular for more than a year now. Like YahooAnswers, people post questions about various topics, and members submit their answers, advice, and suggestions, often adding links to various websites recommending that the person asking the question, check the particular site out to find out more information. As it turns out, several of my lenses, were getting traffic from AnswerBag, a site which I had never heard of before, so I headed over to find out what the site was and to see why it was sending me traffic. As it turns out, several people were referencing several of my lenses as "the best source of information" on the particular topics in question! I was stunned, seeing how I had never heard of this site before and had no idea who any of the people were who were recommending my lenses! The lenses being recommended included my Publishing Methods, Creating Character Profiles, Creating a Fantasy Realm, and Your First Goldfish. As a result of these recommendations, I was getting traffic, and finally decided to join AnswerBag, becoming one the the members answering questions and offering advice, eventually going on to become listed on the site as it's resident expert in Goldfish and Aliens.

On This Lens I Explain How I Get Sales

Which Is Your Most Successful Lens?And How Did It Get That Way?

In October-November when the National Novel Writing Month contest was going on (I won btw!), I was posting comments on their forum and helping out new writers, at a rate of about 50 posts per day. Each one of those posts linked back to my "Publishing Methods" lens via the sig link. During that time I was so focused on the contest that I did not log in on Squidoo (or any other website for that matter) during the entire contest. But than the last week of November rolled in, and I finished my entry early, so I went back to my regular online habits, including Squidoo.

What I found when I got back was a complete and total shock to me, cause not logging in all month I had no idea what my Squidoo lenses had been doing while I was away.

Thanks to my posting over 1000 posts in a 30 day period on the NaNoWriMo forums, my Publishing Methods lens, went from a 14,000 lensrank, all the way up to #32! I found out it had hit Squidoo's Top 100 list about two days after I started posting on the NaNo forums, and that is was getting visits at rate of 400 - 700 per day!

NaNoWriMo had 120,000 people enter it last year, and about 75,000 of them were active posters on the forums, and a good third of those ending up visiting my lens!

The next thing I knew I was getting traffic from bloggers, so I checked the link backs in my stats to see how these blogs which I'd never heard of, were sending traffic to my lens, and I was shocked even further to find that, the writers who had entered the contest, and had found publishers to publish their novel entries, were crediting me and my Publishing Method lens as the "secret to their success!", thus driving even more traffic to my lens via their reviews!

I totally never expected any of this, because I wasn't really actively promoting my lens. I had just stuck it in on my forum sig, without really thinking about it, and than went off to do what I do best, which is help new writers to write better novels.

My lens stayed on the Top 100 list for about a month and a half, and than slowly dropping down to the 500 rank and staying around there ever since.

Oddly though, NaNoWriMo, has a second contest they hold in April, which I have not entered and so am not on their forum posting this year, however, my old posts from last years contest are still being visited and driving traffic to my lens! Thanks to NaNo's April contest going on right now, my Publishing Lens is once again on the move and now hovering around the 200 rank, these past few days. This traffic I'm getting right now is coming in from posts I made during LAST YEAR'S contest! OMG! It just goes to show, that you should be careful what you say on the forums, because even years later, people are still reading your posts!

So, my conclusion is that lensrank is greatly affected by traffic, and heavy doses of traffic in a short time period can really drive lensrank up super fast.

My Top 5 Highest Ranking, Most Visited Lenses Ever

Publishing Methods reached #32 in November of 2007 and gets 100 - 600 visits per week, though in November 2007 and again in November 2008, it got that many visits PER DAY. The other 4, get similar traffic and have each reached 100 - 200 in lensrank.

  • Publishing Methods
  • How should you publish your book? Self-Publishing? Vanity Press? Traditional? POD-People? The Big Five? What's the difference? On this lens I explore the different...
  • Encounters With Aliens, Angels, & Water Faeries
  • I'm making this page about Amphibious Aliens/Water Faeries because . . . I saw one, meet one, made contact, had an encounter with one, or whatever you want to...
  • Lord Sesshomaru Costume
  • Need help creating a Lord Sesshomaru costume? You've come to the right place. I am currently in the process of making a Lord Sesshomaru costume. No idea when...
  • On Being Homeless in Old Orchard Beach, Maine
  • For nearly one year, the trees in this picture, were my home, and under them, I built what is now the famous "tent of Old Orchard Beach". Here is my story.
  • Goth-ography
  • Goth-ography is my lensography just for my Goth-type Lenses, which seem to be adding up quite quickly. With plans for a whole series of Goth type lenses in the...

Secret Tip #1: Forget About Lensrank!

So many people worry and fuss over lensrank it ain't funny.

STOP WORRYING ABOUT LENSRANK!

Yes, I have over 300 lenses.

Yes, several of them are rank under 1,000.

No my highest ranking lenses are not the ones bringing in the most money.

Did you see those two lenses I listed back there, as the two that bring in the most money?

Ironically these 2 lenses of mine that bring in the most money, are both ranked at lower than 30,000!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I have only 2 lenses that I ever worry about lensrank on: Publishing Methods and Lord Sesshomaru Costume.

Why? Because both of these two lenses went straight to the top, hours after I published them, and once they got there, I wanted to make sure that they never came back down. So while my other lenses are often falling to less than 100,000 in rank, these two never go less than 2,000.

While the Publishing Method lens took a month to break the top 100 list, it only took my Lord Sesshomaru Costume lens about 10 hours to break 300.

My Lord Sesshomaru Costume lens went to lensrank 264 less than 7 days after I made it, and has NEVER received less than a top tier payment EVER. Since the day this lens was made it has never gotten less than 50 hits in one day, the highest it got in one day was over 400 hits. It also ranks as #1 on Google's page one for 13 of it's keywords, and in the top 10 on Google's page one for the rest of it's keywords. The answer for this is that it is one of only 2 websites on the entire internet which tell you how to make a Lord Sesshomaru costume.

In other words if you can find a niche topic with not only no other Squidoo lenses about it, but also no other websites at all about it, you can in fact reach tier one ranking. Plus it helps if you promote you lens directly to all the people looking for it. I went directly to everyone who was planning to make this costume and asked them what info they needed, and than made the lens, and went back and told them about it. I had over 200 visits before it went out of WIP less than 24 hours after it was published.

(Off line, I am a sales rep with 10 years of field work, if there's one thing I know how to do, it's find a product people want and than show the where to find it. Training in costumer service and sales rep, helps with Squidoo lens promotion even more than you could possibly imagine.)

Outside of those two lenses though, I never bother with worrying about lensrank, and just my lenses dance up and down the ranks how ever they please.

But Doesn't Lensrank Affect Your CafePress, Zazzle, & Affiliate Sales?

No. Not really.

I have over 20 lenses that do nothing but talk about and promote my CafePress & Zazzle shops. These lenses rank from 13,000 to 241,000 and yet all of them are still driving traffic and sales to my CafePress & Zazzle shops!

It's odd really, but it's my lower ranking lenses that are bringing in the highest affiliate sales off of Amazon and eBay modules. Almost all of my top paying lenses with these two modules rank between 5,000 - 30,000. So, while they are slagging when it comes to lensrank, I'm not going to complain seeing how they are making money anyways.

Likewise, you will notice that my highest ranking lenses (namely Publishing Methods, Lord Sesshomaru Costume, Amphibious Aliens, On Being Homeless, and Goth-ography) rank among my LOWEST is affiliate sales! Why is this? Well, if you will notice only one of those 5 lenses actually has any Amazon or eBay modules on it (Lord Sesshomaru Costume).

You don't need high lensrank to make a sale. It only takes one visitor to buy your items. Forget about lensrank and worry about content. Write good content and your traffic will find a way to get to you.

High Rank, High Traffic, & No Money?

A Look At How My Top 5 Reached Top 5:

Goth-ography

This has got to be the lens that surprised me the most, because this lens was not planned and not promoted, and yet, somehow it got to be my #1 lens in October of 2008 and remained my #1 lens until January 2009. The fact that this lens got any sort of upper level ranking at all still surprises my today.

I have no idea how Goth-ography became one of my highest trafficked & highest ranking lenses. I never did a thing to promote it. It's one of those lenses that I threw together on a whim, one day when I had nothing to do. I made it in about 45 minutes by randomly pulling rants about the Gothic movement off of my blog and pasting them in, in no real order at all. Then, decorated the page with lots of posters via my AllPosters affiliate account. Finally, I turned it into a lensography by sticking all of my Goth-type lenses all over it. Than, forgot about it and never did a thing about it.

For about 6 months it hovered at a 300,000 rank, and remained last on my list of lenses, lucky if it got any traffic at all, seeing 1 or 2 visits per month. Than in August of 2008, nearly a year after it's creation, I logged in one day to find it had jumped 300,000 spaces in rank and was now sitting at #600 and getting nearly that many visits per day. What happened? I have 2 MySpace accounts. One for me and one for my "Goth-me". On that second MySpace account, is a link to my Goth-ography, posted in a blog post, back when I had made the lens. Somebody, I have no idea who, read that blog post, visited my lens, and than posted a MySpace bulletin, telling others to visit it.

The mountains of traffic that lens was suddenly getting, were all coming from a SINGLE MySpace bulletin! One which I was not able to access or read, due to it not having been posted by anyone on my MySpace friends list! After that, Google took over. Apparently, that spike in traffic, attracted Google's attention; the next thing I knew, I was getting traffic from Google, via searches for variation of the word "Gothic". From that day forth, my Goth-ography lens, has been one of my best trafficked and best ranked lenses, and with not a single Amazon or eBay module on it, it remains one of my least profitable lenses as well.

This lens is living proof, that high rank does not necessarily mean you'll make money. To date, this lens has made about $30 total, all of it from lensrank pay alone and all of that from it's short period as my #1 ranked lens in late 2008.

Lesson: Write random lenses for no reason at all, you never know what people will flock to.

  • Goth-ography
  • Goth-ography is my lensography just for my Goth-type Lenses, which seem to be adding up quite quickly. With plans for a whole series of Goth type lenses in the...

High Rank, High Traffic, & No Money? A Look At How My Top 5 Reached Top 5:On Being Homless & Amphibious Aliens

Most of my lenses started out as a one paragraph blog post, which I expanded upon. Two of my 5 top lenses, "On Being Homeless" and "Amphibious Aliens", were both pulled from not my blog, but from the first draft of a book I was commissioned to write in mid-2008. What you find on them, is straight up copies of various chapters of the first uncorrected proof rough draft of my autobiographical book "For Fear of Little Men".

These lenses, being nothing more, than my brain storming outlet for my book, have zero money making modules on them and were not originally promoted. Eventually, they will have links to the book itself, and will be edited as reviews for the book, but for now, these lenses are rapidly changing, daily edited drafts of the book itself. Actually, there are 5 lenses that are drafts for this same book, but the others do not receive the attention these have. Due to news reporters publicizing various events in my life (namely my being homeless and my contact with aliens, which resulted in the angry mob that made me homeless), these two lenses saw an alarming boost in traffic, from curiosity searchers looking to find out more info about the news reports, and both of these lenses are not only heavily trafficked, but also heavily commented, though due to the nature of these lenses, the commenting feature as since been disabled.

As for my traffic, I have ABC News and the resulting curiosity seekers to thank for that, as well as a blog review which "condemned" these lenses by calling them "the tip jars of Squidoo"! LOL! I found that term hilarious seeing how not only do I make not a penny from either of these lenses, but there is absolutely nothing on them that in any way tries to make money! I am accused of supposedly using Squidoo as a means of "panhandling" with these 2 lenses being the "tip jars" themselves! ROTFLMAO! Woo-Hoo! OMG! If the writer of that blog post had actually read the lenses in question, they would have known that I was homeless at one point IN MY PAST and that I am NOT homeless today and that these lenses are the result of me being asked to write a book about how I became homeless, what it was like being homeless, and how I got back on my feet again (a fact which is started on the lenses.) I found out about the "tip jar" blog post after it started sending traffic to my lenses. I love it when people take a quick glance at something, jump to all sorts of conclusions, and than write a bad review without actually knowing anything about the thing they are writing a bad review about. You should always read the entire lens before writing a review about it, you might actually learn something.

Lesson #1: It's your life, write about it.

Lesson #2: Good reviews are good for traffic, but bad reviews are even better.

(UPDATE: Originally one lens, it has now been divided into 3 separate lenses.)

High Rank, High Traffic, & No Money?

A Look At How My Top 5 Reached Top 5:

Publishing Methods

The Publishing Methods lens started out as a rant on one of my blogs and later became a "link farm" linking out and indexing hundreds of useful sites for writers, authors, and self-publishers who needed help sifting through the scams on the internet to find the sites that were really useful.

There are many articles written telling you not to overload your lens with links, because Google hates that. Well, maybe that's true and maybe it isn't. All I know, is that there are well over 500 links on this one lens alone, and that never stopped traffic from coming in, in fact, that was the very reason traffic was coming! I had spent months, researching sites for writers and sifting out the scams, and than putting all of those links together in one place. This is a case of lots of links being a good thing, because they links are targeted and relevant, and meet the customer demand for a list of sites that are useful for new writers.

My goal on this lens was never about making money (it was one of my early lenses made before I was even aware you could make money on Squidoo!). I created a banner for it, and placed that banner in my sig on the NaNoWriMo forums, (a site for writers, authors, and self-publishers, many of whom are teens and young adults just starting out and looking for help in their writing career) and from there things just snowballed, as first one NaNo member after another started writing blog reviews about my lens and how it had been the resource that had helped them to get their first book published.

So, for 2 years, this lens has rocked on without a single affiliate module on it and thus while it is my most trafficked and highest ranked lens ever, it has made $0 in affiliate sales, with it's only income being from lensrank, though due to it's lensrank it has never made less than $7 per month since October 2007. (I have recently added Amazon modules to this lens, so it may soon become one of my money makers lenses.)

Lesson #1: Find a demand, fill the need.

Lesson #2: Listen to advice, but know when to follow it and when to toss it aside.

  • Publishing Methods
  • How should you publish your book? Self-Publishing? Vanity Press? Traditional? POD-People? The Big Five? What's the difference? On this lens I explore the different...

High Rank, High Traffic, & No Money? A Look At How My Top 5 Reached Top 5:Lord Sesshomaru Costume

Of my 5 highest ranked/trafficked lenses, only the Lord Sesshomaru Costume lens had Amazon and eBay modules on it: dozens of them, well over 100. Why? Because this lens is a review lens of sorts, a very tiny niched topic, and one of only TWO websites out there on it's topic: making a Lord Sesshomaru costume. This lens resulted from me making my own costume, and being asked by others how I was doing it, because they wanted to do it too. I created the lens, than emailed the link to my several dozen requesters informing them that I had created the site on their request. It got more than 300 visits with in the first couple of hours after it's being published, and did something totally unheard of on Squidoo: it's first day as a "ranked" lens, it ranked 700! (From a starting creation of being lens # 200,000 and something on Squidoo.) It broke a record for being the fastest moving lens ever on Squidoo. By the end of it's first week it rank #200 and was getting 700 visits PER DAY. Wow! And all I had done was to email it to about 30 people!

What happened? I emailed it to several people who live in Japan, where Sesshomaru is the reigning icon, and can be seen "walking down the streets" every day, all over the country, due to the onslaught of Japanese fangirls who take to dressing up like him and than parading through the streets. These girls, were quick to tell all of their fellow fangirls, who in turn started texting each other, emailing each other, blogging each other, and my oh my, some body ended up contacting the creator of Sesshomaru and next thing I knew I had editors from the comic book telling me what "mistakes" I had made on my lenses. Four months and 24 Lord Sesshomaru lenses later an all out war broke out, as 210 star-struck lovesick crazed fan girls took to a love-hate battle on the comment box of my lens, which receive 210 comments in the space of 6 hours! (All of which now deleted, due to the heated and alarming adult-rated nature of their debate.)

I learned a lot about online traffic from making this lens. I learned, that if you have a hobby and someone sends you an email asking you to create a website telling how you do what you do, then you sure as hell better make that website! Customer demand for this site was out there, but no one had ever made a site like it, and once it was found out I was a hobbiest AND a web builder, every one else in the hobby wanted me to make the site, so I did, and boy, was it worth it!

I also learned that the best online promotion there is, is to tell the person who requested you to build the site, that you built it on their request, and believe me, they will do the rest, via word of mouth! They will tell EVERY ONE! Hobbiests, know other hobbiests. Fanatical die-hard hobbiests are obsessive in their love for their hobby. Fanitical hobbiests know other fanitical hobbiests. Hobbiests love to share "trade secrets" with each other.

My Lord Sesshomaru Costume lens is undoubtedly my "most popular" lens, and yet, while high ranking and heavy trafficked, it ranks as one of my lowest in sales in with it's innumerable Amazon modules. Why? Because it's target audience, is do-it-yourselfer seamstresses who love Lord Sesshomaru. A small audience, looking for advice on how to sew an outlandish and rather difficult to make costume. They are looking for information, and are prone to use every day items to bring their creation to life. I know, because I am one of these crazed fangirls myself. We buy local and we buy cheap, because we have to buy a lot, and are likely to spend thousands of dollars and 3 or 4 years of our time before we finally finish with our costumes. And thus, we are very unlikely to buy anything off an online site in the process, resulting in a very popular, yet very unprofitable website. However, as profit was never the goal of this lens, it does not bother me that it ranks so low on my list of profitable lenses.

Lesson #1: Find a hobby you do, write a lens about it, and tell your hobbiest friends about it. Hobbiests are the best promoters there are of their hobby; they know it, they love it, and they love to tell every one about how much they love it. Best traffic secret there is: love your subject and tell others who love it too.

Lesson #2: If someone requests it and you know all about it, go ahead a write it.

(UPDATE: Originally one lens, it has since been divided into 4 separate lenses.)

  • Lord Sesshomaru Costume
  • Need help creating a Lord Sesshomaru costume? You've come to the right place. I am currently in the process of making a Lord Sesshomaru costume. No idea when...
  • Lord Sesshomaru Costume: Part II
  • This is the continuing tutorial on how to make a Lord Sesshomaru Costume. While Part I focused on Sesshomaru's wardrobe, Part II focuses on his Make-Up, Cla...
  • The Mokomoko
  • Lord Sesshomaru is known for his mokomoko, the weird furry fluffy thing that is draped over his right shoulder. But what is it, and how do you make one for...
  • How Much Did It Cost?
  • I have been asked a few times now, how much is it costing me to make my insanely elaborate, historically accurate, "Hollywood movie quality" Lord Sesshomaru...

High Rank, High Traffic, & No Money?

In Conclusion:

So, there you have it, a behind the scenes look at my traffic vs my lensrank vs my sales. High ranked lenses bring in traffic, low ranked lenses bring in sales. My conclusion? The be successful with Squidoo, you need both.

My 6th most successful lens "Your First Goldfish", is perfect example of this on many levels. I love Goldfish. I raise Goldfish. I know an awful lot about Goldfish. I get asked a lot of questions about Goldfish. So, I wrote a lens titled: Your First Goldfish. It filled a need. Now when people ask me about Goldfish, I can tell them: "I already answered that question, and many others, here . . ." They go to the site, they find the answer, they find other answers, and they find lots of Amazon links.

This lens is different from my Top 5, however in that this lens, gets a steady stream of sales, and while not nearly as high ranked or as high trafficked as the other 5, it ranks as one of my top 5 most profitable lenses. It is what I call a "mid-section lens".

I divide my lenses into four levels or layers: the high ranked lenses, the mid-section lenses, the money makers, and the low-level or WIP lenses. When someone asks me: "What type of lenses should I make?" I tell them, some of each. Be multi-faceted, and create lenses in layers, for that is the true secret to success on Squidoo.

If you take a look at my 5 high ranking/trafficked lenses you will notice a common thread to all 5 of them: They are what is known on Squidoo as "big lenses". How big are they? My Lord Sesshomaru Costume lens has 25,000 words on it. Before being divided into several smaller lenses however, it had 75,000 words on it. And for those who don't know how many words 75,000 words is: a 100 page Nancy Drew book averages at 50,000 to 75,000 words per novel.

Yep, I write lenses that are bigger than the average novel. That is not my biggest lens word-wise, however. My biggest lens ever was "On Being Homeless" before it was divided into the 5 lenses that make up the book's draft today. Between these 5 lenses are a grand total of 274,000 words! If you were to attempt to read the lens top to bottom in one sitting it would take you a minimum of 6 hours, providing your were a speed reader. As I said, this lens (now 5 lenses) is an actual book draft, and thus, you can read the book, as it is being written, changed, and edited. This is the first time I have ever written a book online like this.

These lenses stand out from others on Squidoo in that I am the only lensmaster who actually sits down and spends months (not hours, not days, not weeks, but actual MONTHS) writing the text for a single lens. Obviously, I don't do this with all of my lenses other wise I would not have topped 400 lenses in January 2009. However, it is these mega-huge mega-giants that are bringing the traffic to all of my other lenses, and that is a point to consider. It's something I call "the filter method" of lens creation.

Big lenses, bring in a different type of traffic, than regular lenses. Big lens have lots and lots of words. A lot of text, and not much else. These lenses get lots and lots and lots of traffic for a very simple reason: it takes 4 or 5 days to actually read everything on a "big lens". If you get 30 visits each day for 3 days, it's because the same 30 people kept coming back each day, not because 90 people were visiting your lens. That's the secret to success on Squidoo: you have to keep your readers coming back for more. A big lens is not built for your average browser audience, it is built for the reader audience who is looking for a particular piece of information and is willing to sit down and spend not only several hours, but also several days returning to your lens to read it. The average browser is going to see the "walls of text" and be scared off, but they are very likely to look at one or two of your other lenses before they leave. And that's where "The Filter Method" comes in:

The Filter Method:

What It Is & Why I Do It

The reason I mentioned the Goldfish lens back there is because it or rather my Goldfish hobby itself, was the inspiration for my creating The Filter Method, of lens creation.

Goldfish are messy fish. They produce twice as much wastes as other fish. They Uproot plants, and overturn gravel, and overall cause a huge muddy, cloudy, mess in the tank, which requires a much larger filter, than you would use were you raising any other type of fish. You can't change the nature of the beautiful, yet disruptive and messy fish. All you can do, is provide them with a place to live, and do you best to counteract their messiness with the use of a filter system custom tailored just for Goldfish. The filter on your tank is going to be the determining factor that will decide with you have strong healthy fish or weak sickly fish. The filter you use on your tank, is the most important part of your fish's life.

Squidoo is just like that the the Goldfish tank. You have a big tank and lots of fish who call themselves "Squids" all swimming around and stirring things up and making a big mess while they are all trying to compete with each other for lensrank. Each of those Squid has their own tank, and in each tank are their lenses all floating around.

In a successful Goldfish filter, you need a layer of filter media. The first layer is a sponge with big holes in it. This sponge attracts all of the particles in the water and draws them in. However, only the biggest particles will get stuck in the sponge, the smaller ones go right on through the holes and would head back into the water, if you don't add a second layer of media, this time a cotton batting. The cotton, like the sponge, also draws in the water, but it draws it in more slowly, due to the smaller holes, like wise, it traps all but the smallest of the particles. The tiny particles would go back into the tank, but now you add the third layer, a carbon layer, with holes that are almost microscopic. The big and mid sized particles will ever reach this layer, but the microscopic ones will. In the end, what goes in as very dirty water, comes out clean.

The thing about the filter is that if you take any one of those layers away, the whole system fails. The more layers you have the healthier your fish are. But take away any one of those layers and your fish become sick.

Squidoo lenses are the same way. You have the big lenses, the ones that draw in lots of traffic, but than don't keep much of that traffic, and thus don't bring in much of an income. The traffic they brought in however, now wants to look at your other lenses. Your smaller, mid level lenses, have a mix of text and money maker modules, and while they don't draw in nearly as much traffic as the big lenses, they hold the traffic longer, thus are prone to higher sales and will become you most profitable lenses. Most of you traffic is going to stop here, but some are going to want more, and they will move down to the next level, to your "shopping" lenses (low ranked which are just to promote items for sale and nothing else) and the seasonal lenses (Christmas, Halloween, Valentine's etc.; popular for only a week or 2 each year). These lenses will only draw in minimal traffic, but they will bring in enough of an income to warrant making them.

Like the layers in the fish tank filter, you should have a few lenses from each level: big lenses to attract lots of traffic; mid-sized lenses to bring in profits; low ranked or season ranked lenses to fill in the gaps that the other two missed. If you have nothing but "big lenses" you'll get lots of traffic, lots of lensrank, but no income to show for it. If you have lots of low-ranked or seasonal lenses, you won't get much traffic, and with out the traffic from your big lenses, you won't get as many sales either. Nothing but the average to mid-ranked lenses will, bring in an income, but not nearly as much as you would have had, had you had a high trafficked big lens drawing people in. You see, like the filter on the fish tank, having lenses of varying types and sizes will bring in a wider variety of traffic and and filter that traffic throughout all of your other lenses.

Google likes a lot of text. Google is going to send more traffic to a text heavy lens than to a Amazon-link heavy lens. You want a big lens to attract the traffic. Only the readers are going to stay, the rest are going to trickle through to your other lenses. That's why I call it the Filter Method, and that's why I have the mega-huge lenses, like this one you are reading right now . . . notice how there is not a single money maker module on this lens, and yet, this lens sends heavy traffic to most of my other lenses, making it one of my most profitable lenses even though it in and of itself does not make any affiliate income. This lens is a "filter" drawing in traffic and than dispersing it to my other lenses.

OMG! You Have 313 Lenses! How Did You Ever Find So Many Topics To Write About? Where Do You Get Your Ideas?

I have a lot of hobbies and lead a very busy life. I get my ideas for topics to write about from my life, my hobbies, my jobs, my family, things I do, places I go, etc. Here is a list of the things that inspire me most:

  • I am a writer. I write books. I write short stories. I started writing in 1978. I have been writing for a very long time. I have a million and one fictional characters running rampant in my brain, begging, no not begging, demanding I write about them. I write so much so often, that I get a lot of emails asking for advice on how to be a better writer, and thus I currently have 32 lenses devoted to helping writers write and publish what they write.
  • Comic books. I love comic books. I own more than 7,000 comic books. I collect comic book memorabilia. I collect autographed comic books from my fave comic book authors and artists. I email most of said authors and artists constantly. I dress up in my dayly life as my favorite comic book characters. I am a freelance writer who writes comic book scripts for Danish comic books. Did I mention I love comic books and that my favorite lens of all the lenses I have ever made is completely devoted to a comic book character and resulted in nearly 20 other sub-lenses spun off of it?
  • M-I-C-K-E-Y-M-O-U-S-E spells Donald Duck! And I'm still loving comic books. I love Disney. I love Disney Ducks. I own one of the world's largest Disney Comic book collections. I have gotten a lot of them autographed. I collect Disney comic books, Disney DVDs, Dinesy picture books, Disney toys, Disney cloths, Disney socks, Disney totebags . . . hell I'm a walking Disney advertisement half the time! LOL! I got A LOT of Disney related lenses.
  • Manga. What the hell is Manga you ask? Why it's Japanese comic books of course! uh-uh, even more comic books. You know, I'm seeing a pattern here . . . comic books strike again! Three of my highest ranking lenses are devoted to Manga and Anime (cartoons based on Japanese Comic Books).
  • I'm a costumer-fashion designer-Glam-Goth: big hair, bright colors, fishnets, sparkles, sequins, gowns fit for an 1300's princess from France and elaborate kimonos any Japanese demon would envy, capes, hats, frock coats, all that glitters is better than gold, esp if it's purple. I make all of my cloths myself from drawings I created and patterns I made from scratch, a result of having a seamstress for a mother and taking a two year course in Dressmaking and Fashion Design. I make a lot of lenses about CosPlay, fashion, and sewing.
  • I live on a farm. I own and run The Pidgie Fund, a shelter that rescues feral cats and pit-fighter cocks (roosters). My home is currently the home of 13 formally stray no-longer feral cats, and 60+ now tame and peaceful roosters, and one 13 year old dog who loves all his cats and birds. I write lenses on animals as a result.
  • I have a garden. Me and my dog and my cats and my birds all spend hours in the shade of my rose bushes and lilacs and hostas and lilies and orchids. I have a few lenses about plants and gardening.
  • I like to cook. I am a vegetarian. I love Asian food. I love pizza. I have started (though not yet finished) several lenses on cooking and foods.
  • I read books. A lot of books. I read books A LOT. I own The Twighlight Manor Library. In The Twighlight Manor Library collection is more than 10,000 books which took me nearly 30 years to acquire. I have library cards at 4 local and one state library. I take out an average of 15 books each week, from EACH of those 5 libraries. When those 5 libraries have book sales, they provide lots of big boxes just for me, because they know I'll be the first one through the door, and I'll buy them out in the first hour of the sale, so long as I can keep packing more books into my dad's car, my mom's car, and my boyfriend's car, and the cars of anyone else I can convince to tag along to help me carry home the hundreds of books I buy each time I go to a library book sale. Yes, I really do buy books at a rate of hundreds a week and by car loads. . . you don't end up with more than 10,000 books by buying one or two books at a time! I love all of my books and I have several lenses devoted to them.
  • I like music, movies, and video games. I write lenses about singers, music, actors, TV shows, movies, and video games.
  • I obsess very obsessively over the things I like best in this world and end up with massive collections and lots of lenses about those collections. I have 240 lenses because like everything else in my life, I could not join Squidoo without getting obsessed over it.

Here is an Index of My Lenses


  • Ekography: EelKat's Lensography
  • I joined Squidoo in April of 2007. At the time of Ekography's last edit I had 313 lenses and 23 groups. I make new ones all the time, so watch for new ones...
  • Goth-ography
  • Goth-ography is my lensography just for my Goth-type Lenses, which seem to be adding up quite quickly. With plans for a whole series of Goth type lenses in the...
  • EelKat's InuYasha Lenses Headquarters
  • EelKat's InuYasha Lenses I needed a place to catalog and keep track of all of my InuYasha lenses, because I now have more than I can keep track of with out...
  • EelKat's Animal Lenses Headquarters
  • EelKat's Animal Lenses All of my pet, bird, and animal topic lenses gathered into one place.
  • EelKat's Lenses For Writers Headquarters
  • EelKat's Lenses For Writers I have so many lenses about writing that I now need a way to index and catalog them, and I'm starting this group to use as my lensography...

Help! I Can't Think of Any More Topics!

What About Burn Out?

How Do You Avoid It?

Believe it or not, I get stuck all the time! Ironically that is how I ended up with 350 lenses! but than I deleted a bunch of them a few weeks ago and ended up down under 300 again.

Anyways, when I get bored and can't think of anything to do on Squidoo, I usually end up on one of the forums I haunt (eBay's Soapbox, NaNoWriMo, AbsoluteWrite, CosPlay.com, 4HWW, PortCon, ProBoards Support, Mrs. Nesbits, Snape's Dungeon, and of course SquidU). Next thing I know I'm busy posting and chatting with other members and from chatting with my online buddies I usually come up with ideas for new lenses. I find forum chatting a great way to come up with new lens topic ideas.

That doesn't always work, though, and sometimes I just don't log in on Squidoo at all. I figure, if I'm not getting any ideas, than I'm suffering from burnout and need a break. Usually I'll not log in for 7 or 8 days. Gives me time to clear my head from Squidoo and start over. The longest I ever went was 3 months, not logging in.

Sometimes you just need a break. No matter how much you love a hobby, if you do it too much you'll get bored with it, so it's best to give yourself a vacation from your hobbies every once in a while, and building Squidoo lenses is no exception. So I just give myself a *Squidoo vacation* and go about with the rest of the things I do in life.

Usually by the time I finally come back to Squidoo, my head is so full of ideas that I can't keep up with them.. You can tell when I've taken a vacation from Squidoo, because when I come back, I end up with 20 new lenses in one week! (though I sometimes end up deleting them, once I *come to my senses* and realize I just can't handle that many at once!)

How Do Your Lenses Go From An Idea To A Lens?

The Horrors of Having 4,000 Blog Posts

How do my lenses get started? OMG! That is a nightmare in itself. Long before I was a Squidooer, I was a Blogger, and an overly hyper active rampant blogger at that.

I've got several blogs, (32 from one blog host alone!) some of them have been around for years, but most of them I don't use anymore, so I won't bother listing those. One of my older blogs has just under 2,000 posts on it and I still keep posting over there.

I do have one that actually is a "Squidoo" blog, more or less; well it isn't a Squidoo blog, it's just me going off on a rant every few days. The weird thing about this is is that nearly every single rant I wrote foor this blog has since expanded and become a Squidoo lens!

I call it my Squidoo blog, but it's not so much a blog about Squidoo, as it my "workshop" where I do my writing up drafts for Squidoo lenses, so it's really random and often a complete mess, but if anyone wanted to see how my Squidoo lenses get from an idea to a lens, this is the place you'd want to go.

Most every one of my lenses started out as a post on this blog, and they usually end up with links on the blog once I get done with them. If you start following my posts on this blog, you know pretty much what my next Squidoo Lens is going to be about. Here are my lastest posts:


Vandals Members of the LDS Saco Ward/Mormon Church Do $50,000 in Damage to The Goldeneagle


some thoughts on blog post stealing


More Random Dollmaking Tweets and more Xavier Obsessions


More thoughts on writing doll patterns


Etsy RE: A vent regarding hand knitted items....


test post


New Pictures and Updating my Etsy Store Today


Stolen Car: Please ReTweet & RePost: Help us find the Goldeneagle! Maine's Famous "Haunted Car" Has Been Stolen by religion crazed fanatics!


As Requested - The Previously unposted except of "For Fear of Little Men" - Why I Kept The Goldeneagle All These Years - An Inside Look at Life Behind the Padlocked Doors of The Atwater Family Compound and the Story of How The Infamous Saco Ward of Maine got it's Start and Created a Religious Monster


GRAND THEFT AUTO attempt on the GoldenEagle ... A longer more detailed explanation about why I have not sleep or eaten in 4 days...Or operation rescue The Goldeneagle from car thieves, than stand guard 24 hours.


What advice would you give to other lensmasters?

  • Write what you know, no matter how over done, weird, cliche', niched, controversial, or obscure it is. If you know it and love it and do it yourself, than you can write about it.
  • Set your pen on fire and write with passion. Let the flames of your passion burn through to your readers hearts. Make them feel that what you write is of vital importance.
  • Write a lot. Write a little bit more. And when you think you are done, go back and write some more. Never be afraid of writing too much, you can always divide it up into a series of lenses if you get too long to fit it all on one lens.
  • Love your topic. Only write about things you actually do yourself. Only write about things you believe in. Only write about things you use. Only promote products you buy and use yourself. Only give advice you yourself would take and do. Be true to what you believe in, never lie to your readers just to make a quick buck.
  • Be creative. Be yourself. Dare to be different. Try new things. Do something that no one else has done before. Don't follow the road: build it!
  • Let your personality show though your writing. Speak the way you want to be heard. Talk to your readers the same way you would face to face. You are not a college textbook so don't sound like one in your writing.

Secret Tip: #2 DO NOT LIMIT YOUR LENS TOPICS!

A lot of people come to Squidoo from CafePress, and use Squidoo to promote their shops. This is good. This is very good. I do this too. Squidoo is great for promoting CafePress shops. They even have a module to help you do so.

A common thing I have found folks to do is to focus on writing lenses on one topic and one topic only for the sole purpose of promoting their CafePress shops. Often they feel that they should ONLY write lenses that are the same topic as their CafePress shops. This can become your downfall.

DO NOT LIMIT YOUR LENS TOPICS!

EXPAND! EXPAND! EXPAND!

You have a lot of hobbies, interests, likes, and dislikes. Write lenses about all of them . . . each and every one of them!

You can write lenses about anything, and for every topic out there, somewhere there is a CafePress shop to promote it. If you feature some one else's shop you get an affiliate payment and you help a fellow CafePress-er make a sale... I feature all of my own shops as much as possible, but my CafePress items are limited in topic, and my Squidoo lenses have a wide range of topics, so when I don't have a CafePress item of my own to promote, I head to CafePress's marketplace and look for someone who does and promote their shop instead!

I'm always on the look out for other people's CafePress shops to promote, and as my Squidoo lenses get heavily trafficked, that means I'm sending traffic to you and your CafePress shop, wither you have a Squidoo account or not!

Write About Things That Matter To You

What's the most important thing for you to keep in mind when building a new lens? Writing about things that matter to YOU. Forget about what the latest "hot topic" is. Forget about what you think "others" will like.

Ask yourself: What do you like? What are your hobbies? What are YOUR favorite things to talk about with your friends? That's what you should build lenses about. Things that interest you. Things that you enjoy. Why?

Because if you like it, than you'll enjoy writing about it. If you enjoy writing about it, than you'll be inspired to put your heart and soul into writing it. And that's what people who read Squidoo lenses want to read. They don't want mountains of links and Flikr pics and YouTube vids. Those are all good, yes, but they want to hear your take on the subject. They want to hear your views. They want to know why you chose your topic. So be sure to add lots of text modules and fill them up with lots of writing. Lots of content is good... especially if it's content that you care deeply about. Write what you know. Write what matters to you. That is the secret to great lenses.

Me . . . :P

Perfect Man #1. YAY! Dog Demons!

Perfect Man #2. YAY! Pirates!

You Seem To Promote Other People's Lenses an Awful Lot. Why? What is in it for you? Should I be doing this on my lenses?

Why?

No reason really. I just love to show off lenses I like, It doesn't matter if it's a lens I built or one that somebody else built, if I like it I'll find a reason to tell others to check it out. In fact, I have actually built lenses just so I could showcase other peoples lenses!

What is in it for you?

Not a thing. It just feels good knowing that I can do something to help others get traffic to their own lenses, thats all.

Should I be doing this on my lenses?

Absolutely! I believe that having "things to do" on your lenses, well help to make your readers stay on your lenses longer and come back to visit it more often. Recommending other folks lenses, gives your readers something to do after they have finished reading your lens. It'll help the other lensmaster to get more traffic. It'll promote a better feeling that Squidoo is an interconnected community and not a bunch on random pages. It's a win-win, it helps you, it helps other lensmasters, and it helps your readers.

But I've never featured a lens before, how do I do it?

Easy, all you do is go to the "A - Z List", under section "F", and add the "Featured Lenses" module to your lens. Than in the blank, add the URL of the lens you want to feature. You can feature up to 5 lenses in each module.

Lenses I Built To Showcase Featured Lenses On

  • The Lensography Index
  • Welcome to the biggest and most complete alphabetical index of lensographies on Squidoo. (I know it's the biggest and most complete list on lensographies made...
  • The Stress Buster Lensography
  • On one of my other lenses I was talking about getting rid of work place stress and it got me to thinking about ways to fill your life with happiness and joy,...
  • Faith Not Religion
  • I love reading religious lenses. I was reading THIS LENS today (April 24, 2008) and had posted a reply on it's debate, when it occurred to me, that I feel very...

How often do you update your lenses?

Every single day.

Well, not every lens, every day.

Usually, I'll have an idea pop into my head and I'll say, "Hey, that'd be great for that lens." Next thing I know, I'm logged in and editing away.

As a general rule I'll edit 3 or 4 lenses a day.

How often do you create new lenses?

I used to have the goal to create at least 1 new lens per day. My goal was to reach 100 lenses, which I did 6 months in, and than kept going to reach 200 which took me another 4 months to do. Than I started striving for 300, but am going at a much slower pace. I probably won't hit 300 until this fall now, because my focus now is no longer quantity.

Now that I've got quantity, I'm striving for quality. A lot of my lenses don't meet up with the standards I've given myself to meet (and I'm a very hard task master on myself too!) I've got about 40 really good lenses, and the rest really need A LOT of work, before I am comfortable saying they are really good.

Right now I have 262 lens published and about 20 more still WIP, so my main focus is editing, updating, improving and overall making better the lenses I already have. After I've got the lenses I already have improved to the point that I'm happy with them, than I'll start up creating new lenses more often again. But for now I only make about 1 new lens once every week or so.

What common mistake do you, as a lensmaster, make most often?

Spelling. Spelling is my curse. My spelling problem is two-fold. For one thing I never learned how to spell properly in the first place, which results in me spelling phonetically the words I can't memorize from reading them in books.

Secondly, I have dyslexia, (the reason I was never able to learn to spell properly) and tend to spell about half the words I write in complete reverse, example, if I want to say cat, usually I write tac.

In my case even the best spell checker is unable to correct my spelling, because of the front to back spelling reversal. Spell checkers look at the first 2 letters and than guess at what you should have spelt. But when what should be the first 2 letters are now the last 2 letters, the spell checker totally has no idea what word you were saying.

It took me nearly three years to self program my MSWorks spell checker, but eventually I did get it programed to catch my odd misspellings and set them right, so today, most folks see what I type on my lenses and forum posts and they just assume I'm a pretty good speller, when in fact, all of my posts are first typed using FireFox (the browser auto spell checks) and than run through my customized MSWorks. A process that takes a bit of time, and results in me not answering as quickly as I might had I typed the forum post right into the reply box.

Even doing all this, a lot of misspelling still slip by, but at least you can actually read what I wrote. If my words had not been spell checked, you would be hard pressed to make heads or tails of them at all.

What does all this mean for my Squidoo lenses? It means that lenses that should take me 2 or 3 days to build, actually take me as long as 3 to 4 weeks to build, because once I have built the lens, I have to run it through a massive series of checks and rechecks, often 4 or 5 times, before I finally am able to catch all of the spelling errors. It's a long and tedious process, but it can be done, and as you can see, even with many mistakes still on about half of my lenses, I did become a Giant Squid, during their first round in September of 2007. (Spelling is one of the criteria of becoming a Giant Squid.)

There was a time when I was constantly fretting over my spelling, and I tied like hell to learn to spell properly, but after years of trying every spelling program under the sun, and wasting money and stressing myself out over it, finally, I just said to hell with it, this is just the way my mind is going to spell words wither I like it or not, and I'm going to have to learn to live with it and deal with it. The fact is, I'm an author, and an author who has to constantly rely on an editor to help you with little basics like spelling, really becomes a burden all around. I knew I had to make an effort to change this, and if I couldn't change how I spelt things, than I was just going to have to find a way to correct the miss spellings after I'd written them. Once I had accepted the fact that this was a disability that I could not change, I was able to move past it and find ways to work around it and not let it get in the way of my life anymore. This wasn't something I overcame over night though, it took many many years and a whole lot of patience. Now, there are few people who look at my words who could guess that I had dyslexia, most just assume that the few misspellings they see are minor typos, caused by typing too fast and missing a few keys!

For other lensmasters with similar spelling difficulties, I suggest you change your browser to FireFox, as that'll catch most all of your mistakes, as you type. And if you have a lot of words that the normal spell checker misses, than use MSWorks and add those custom words into the spell checker, so that it does catch them.

What non-Squidoo resource have you found that helps you with your lenses?

That's easy. Two answers, and look, I'll even provide links to their websites so you can look them up! Ain't that nice of me. They are:


I currently have 15 books out from one and 8 books out from the other and all of those books are siting here by my computer, because I got them out to do research for several of my lenses. I visit each of these two libraries on a weekly basis and you can find me there quite often, usually doing research for something, and always with mountains of books. The most books I ever took out at one time from Portland was 32.

A Picture Because I Felt Like Putting It Here

Do you rely on Google for traffic to your lenses?

No! Not at all!

When I first joined Squidoo on April 17, 2007, I was getting most all of my traffic from Google and Google only. At that point I had 15 lenses, which I wasn't updating, and I did not know much about Squidoo. Google hits were at 100 - 300 per page per week.

Than in October of 2007 after the Squidoo Google Slap, my lenses all dropped to getting very little traffic from Google, so I started doing my own self-promotion instead to bring in traffic other than from Google. At that point Google hits were 10 - 20 per page per week.

Now, in April of 2008, it's a good thing I did, because in the past month, not a single one of my lenses has gotten a single hit of Google. No one is sure what is going on, but it's so wide spread across Squidoo, that it appears Google has sent Squidoo yet another "slap" and has cut off traffic hits entirely. Looking at my stats page, it's like Google has completely vanished! Now 100% of my traffic comes from my own self-promotion and no where else at all.

The Story Of My Only Lens Google Loves:

  • Flamers: Good For Lensrank?
  • It was a dark and stormy night, when I was struck by the Attack of the FanGirls. This is the story of how one long dead lens, suddenly and without warning,...

Do you ever buy leads to get traffic?

I found this to be a very odd question. But I got asked, so I need to find an answer for it. First off, I have never heard of "buying leads" before. What an odd idea! So, I'm not entirly sure what buying leads is or how one would go about doing it. So, I can answer right quick and say: No, I have never bought leads before.

That should be the end of my answer, right? What me? Answer you with a single sentence? Not likely. You see, this question inspires some thinking on my part and gets me to wondering: Are there really people out there who pay money for marketing? I suppose there must be otherwise I wouldn't have been asked if I do it, right?

I looked it up, and from what I read, it seems that buying leads, is nothing more than a scam, which makes the lead brokers a lot of money, but which pays you only in the promise that you will get traffic to your site . . . some day . . . as long as you just keep sending them monthly checks. Actually, I found thousands of people saying that they had yet to see any traffic at all, even after paying thousands of dollars. I even found a couple of lenses right here on Squidoo, warning against buying leads! So, I haven't tried it, and based on what I'm reading, I'm not going to either.

But the fact remains, you are asking me if I spend money. Yeah . . . about that . . . I don't spend money.

You got to understand here, that the whole concept of spending money is very foreign to me. I'm now making money on Squidoo, but that is a relatively new thing in my life. I've only been on Squidoo for 2 years. Before Squidoo, my income was almost non-existent. In the past 30 years, the most money I had ever made in a single year was $1,800, and that was twice what I normally make. Most years I make less than $800. I've never had money to spend. Never spend money, so never think about things that cost money, and never bother trying to make money to spend either, as I find the concept of "money to spend" a rather vain and foolish notion.

When people come by and see how I live I get the whole: "But, but, but . . . your cloths . . . the way you dress . . . I thought you wear a millionaire. . . you . . . you live in the woods under a tarp? How can you live like this? Don't you need running water? Electricity? Heat? You don't have a phone. Not even a cell phone?!? OMG! How do live without a phone? I'd die without a phone! What's wrong with you? How can you take a refusal of spending money to such extremes?"

When I say I don't like spending money, you better believe I won't spend a penny for ANYTHING. Of course, I've had the comment "Well you're just acting as stingy as a miserly old Scotsman." thrown at me a few times, to which I answer: "Why thank you. How did you know I was Scottish?" They think I'm being sarcastic. I'm not. My grandmother on my dad's side was Scottish, and so was my Grandfather on my mother's side, in fact, he was an immigrant and lived in the US for 70 years before applying for US citizenship. Both married Indians: one a Kickapoo and one a Cherokee. So if you want to start throwing politically incorrect name calling at me, about my spending money like a Scotsman, it might first interest you to know that I am in fact Scottish. Thank you. But moving on, what has any of this to do with buying leads for marketing? Well, like I said, I don't spend money.

When it comes to marketing and such (with me that is) I don't do anything that costs money. Of course it helps that I've never owned either a phone or a credit card too, resulting in I can't join anything that required either information. I also don't spend money off line either, (locals refer to me as a hermit because 4 or 5 months or more go by between my leaving the yard). I did grow up on a farm. I am a farmer. I grow my own food, and what I do by I buy in bulk so I have a years's worth at once. I can live quite well, for years without ever having physical contact with Humans . . . in fact, there was a 20 period when I did just that. Fact is, you got to be around another Human to give them the money for the thing you are buying from them. Yeah. People issues = money issues = no money to spend to begin with = living a very thrifty lifestyle to make up for the lack of money = waste not want not = if I can't see it, touch it, hold it, why should I pay money for it? You see where this is leading too? How this all ties in with me not buying leads online?

Can I see the lead? No.

Can I touch the lead? No.

Can I eat the lead? No.

Can my pets eat the lead? No.

Will the lead keep me warm at night? No.

Okay. I can't see it, I can't touch it, I can't taste it, and it's not going to protect me from Maine's fierce snowstorms, so why should I spend money to buy it, if it serves no useful purpose for me?

I need to see it to buy it, and it has to be something I'll use (food, books, or fabric, and nothing else at all) or I won't pay money for it. My income has been for many years less than $1,800 a year, so I can't spend money on things I can't see or can't use, and thus the reason I never buy any marketing things. When it comes to marketing if it ain't free, I don't need it!

Now, granted, my extreme lifestyle (as it has been referred too) is not something you are likely to be doing yourself, but the principle still applies to you no matter how you live. If you can't see it, can't touch it, can't feed your family with it, can't keep your family warm with it, you really should ask yourself this: "Why the heck should I spend money on it?"

Fact is, there are hundreds of ways to market your site/lenses for free and you should only spend money on marketing AFTER you have exhausted the free leads first.

Where Do You Get The Traffic To All Your Lenses From?(The Answer To The #1 Most Asked Question I Get From My Readers)

Okay, I've been sent this question a couple of times now, so I decided it was time for me to do some research and find out just where exactly my traffic to my lenses does come from. So from January 2008 to April 2008 I tracked my traffic and here are the results of where most all of my readers are coming from. Looking to see where my readers come from and reading my current stats on my most trafficked lenses, here is where my traffic comes from:


  • FaceBook messages (posted by me to my 100+ friends)

  • MySpace bullitens (posted by me to my 2,000+ friends)

  • MySpace forum/group posts (coming in from messages posted by me on 62 different groups)

  • lensrolls from other Squidoo lenses

  • sesshoumaruscastle.krescentmoon.net (a fansite that links back to my Sesshomaru lenses)

  • forums.cafepress.com (sig link click-outs)

  • eBay forum posts (sig link click-outs) mostly from the Soapbox and Comics boards

  • NaNoWriMo forum posts (sig link click-outs)

  • Crossdressers.com forum posts (sig link click-outs)

  • TV.com forum posts (sig link click-outs) mostly from the InuYasha board

  • CosPlay.com forum posts (sig link click-outs)

  • AbsoluteWrite.com forum posts (sig link click-outs)

  • SquidU forum posts (sig link click-outs)

  • 4dayworkweek forums (some members there recommenced my lenses for helping home business start ups and now I'm getting steady traffic from them!)

  • my blog's blogrolls

  • several different NaNoWriMo members' blogs (several WriMoer's attribute their writing success to my Publishing Methods lens and have added it to their blogrolls!)

  • StumbleUpon.com

  • ProBoardsSupport forum posts (sig link click-outs)

  • various assorted ProBoards hosted forums (sig link click-outs)

  • zazzle.com (profile link click-outs)

  • mail.yahoo.com (this means that people are emailing links to my lenses in their emails! OMG!)

  • mail.google.com (means even more people are emailing links to my lenses!)

  • dogpile.com (a search engine, who for some reason sends me a lot of traffic)

  • twitter.com (weird, considering I don't have a Twitter account, this means folks are posting links to my site there!) (EDIT: after seeing this, I opened a Twitter account)

  • associatedcontent.com (links from an article)

  • fourhourworkweek.com (a forum, where someone was recommending a few of my lenses; I have since joined this forum)

  • rader.org (a site that reviewed my lenses)

  • images.google.com (I make sure to type keyword/tags in my image names)

  • search.cnn.com (odd... I thought this was a news site, does that mean I'm news?)

  • feeds.feedburner.com (I was not aware lenses had feeds until I saw this one)

  • library.stuartholme.qld.edu.au (I have no idea what this one is, but I get regular traffic from it)

  • lulu.com (does this mean THEY have linked to my lens???)

  • aolsearch.aol.com (another non-google search engine)

  • webcrawler.com

  • search9.info.com (another search engine)

  • delicious.com (means somebody tagged me)

  • my.att.net (another search engine)

  • search.myway.com

  • search.peoplepc.com

  • www3.look-up-results.com

  • alexa.com

  • mysearch.com

  • search.conduit.com

  • animeonline.net (a forum)

  • digg.com (means somebody dugg me)

  • search.yahoo.com

  • sociedadaugusta.com (no idea what this one is)

  • cyberstroll.com (no idea what this is either)

And there you have it. The answer to the most asked question I get in regards to my Squidoo lenses. Now you know where my traffic comes from.

An interesting thing I should point out here, is that these lenses get 7 - 35 visits on weeks that I do not visit the forums mentioned above, however they also get 175 - 300 visits on weeks that I do visit those forums and post on a lot of threads.

Another interesting thing is that not a single one of my lenses gets more than 10 visits per week from Google, in fact most get no hits at all from Google, with 100% of my traffic coming from clicks on my forum sig links

So, over all, I say the best way to bring traffic to your lens, is to add a link to it in your sig on every forum you post on, and than just sit back and chat up a storm with people on the forums. If they like the things you say in your forum posts, chances are good they'll click on your sig link to find out what else you have to say.

Another thing is, you'll notice that I have a lot of lenses about comic book topics and those are linked to my sig used on eBay, where I talk to comic book fans. On CosPlay.com and on CrossDressers.com, my forum sig link back to my fashion-cosplay-costume-drag queen lenses. On NaNoWriMo and AbsolutWrite forums, my sig links back to my lenses for self publishers and authors.

So it helps if you match your sig links to the group you are talking to as well. And it also helps if you write Squidoo lenses about topics that you actually practice in your daily life, cause people like to get advice on how to do things from people who actually do them; an example of this would be:


  • I'm an author who self publishes my books, therefor I write Squidoo lenses on how to self publish your books and chat with other authors on forums for authors . . .

  • I'm a girl who CosPlays male characters, therefor I write Squidoo lenses about sewing costumes and CosPlaying and cross dressing, and I chat on forums for seamstresses, costumers, cosplayers, and cross dressers. . .

I'm comic book collector and comic book script writer, therefore I also write Squidoo lenses about comic books and chat on forums for comic book fans.

You get the basic idea right? Create Squidoo lenses about things you do in real life, and promote them to others who do or want to do the things you can teach them how to do.

How To Get Traffic To Your Lenses: More Things I Do and Info You Should Read

Squidoo : Bookmarklet

Bookmarklet InfoIntroducing The Squidoo Bookmarklet

With the Squidoo Bookmarklet in hand, you are only ever just one click away from adding great content to your lens. The Book...

tagfoot : can your bookmarks do this?

tagfoot is currently in private beta and is accepting new members by invitation only.notify me as soon as tagfoot goes into public beta...your comments here (max. 500 chars)sending...

Squidoo Enhanced - Addon for Firefox

Installed by 164 Lensmasters!Squidoo Enhanced - Addon for Firefox - Beta

This adds extra features to the Lens Workshop and a few other pages on Squidoo.

To use this addon, you will need to install the

Greasemonkey plugin,

and then install this script

(last updated 13 Sep 2008). Features Dashbo...


  • This is the best thing I've ever added to my lenses, no lensmaster should be without it!

~EK

Did You Know You Can Get Traffic From CNN? | Essential Keystrokes

So, I was going about my business last week when the latest story about another toy recall hit. The recall of Aqua Dots struck a nerve with me because...

Three simple actions that doubled my website traffic in 30 days

Three simple actions that doubled my website traffic in 30 days...

Increased Website Traffic: How can I build traffic on my website?

Tips and help to build your business by increasing traffic and getting the right kind of visitors to visit your website. Read more...

Webmaster tools

Add your site to 19 search engines and 23 directories all with one url submission!

You Must Have Learned Your SEO and Traffic Tricks Some Where, Can You Tell Me Where You Learned To Do This Stuff?

Yep. Trail and error for the most part. I've been on the internet since 1997, so I've had 11 years of doing stuff and learning what works and what doesn't work.

However, in about 2005, I ran across a blog that went on to become the ONLY blog whose RSS feed I subscribe too, as well as the only blog I active read and comment on: ProBlogger written by Darren Rowse. Somewhere on his blog is the story of how he got started, what he did, and how he retired just 2 years after starting his blog. Today he lives off the income brought in from his blog alone, and his blog brings in a whopping $200,000+ per year! ProBlogger is the world's most trafficked blog, as well as the most sought after blogger, and he got that way for a reason: It is quite simply the best blog ever written!

What does he write? He writes about making money online, while avoiding the scams, the MLMs, the get-rich-quick-sceems, and how to drive traffic and sales to your site. He does it without telling you to buy an eBook or sending you to ClickBank links. He tells you what he did, what worked for him, what flopped for him, and he posts it all 100% free right on his blog! All you have to do is search through the topic list for old blog posts and you can find the answer to almost every question you could ever think of to ask about building and promoting a website that brings in both traffic and cash.

Hey, I'll even make it easy for you, by posting the RSS feed of his blog here on my lens. Here are the last 5 posts he has written:

Forget about Marketing: Concentrate on Blogging

This is a guest contribution by Nicholas Whitmore. The title: What on earth does it mean? Well, recently it seems like a lot of bloggers fancy themselves as marketers. You can?t read a post on a blog without seeing a load of other bloggers commenting at the bottom, with a link back to their own site. [...]

Originally at: Blog Tips at ProBlogger

Forget about Marketing: Concentrate on Blogging

Why Your Blog Posts Are Falling Short of Greatness and What To Do About It

This is a guest contribution by Belinda Weaver, marketing copywriter behind The Copy Detective. You?ve finished your latest blog post and it?s pretty good isn?t it, isn?t it? Are you sure?   Some bloggers think that coming up with ideas is the hardest part of blogging. Maybe you agree. Personally, I think it?s harder to [...]

Originally at Blog Tips at ProBlogger

Why Your Blog Posts Are Falling Short of Greatness and What To Do About It

How to Make Your Blogging Dreams Come True

"ONE DAY I'll be a full time blogger!" ‘V' – my wife – must have heard that statement 100 or more times in 2003-2004. It would usually be accompanied by a spread sheet and/or chart in which I showed her how the earnings from my blog had grown from $9 per month to $11 per [...]

Originally at: Blog Tips at ProBlogger

How to Make Your Blogging Dreams Come True

Challenge: Update Your Blog?s About Page

Today I want to set us all a little homework – a challenge of sorts – to update your blogs ‘About Page'. This challenge evolves out of the embarrassing realisation that my own about page here on ProBlogger was dated and in need of a refresh. It had been well over 12 months since I'd [...]

Originally at: Blog Tips at ProBlogger

Challenge: Update Your Blog's About Page

Set Your Blog for Success With These Simple Tactics

This is a guest contribution from freelance writer, Ayelet Weisz. Blogging is hard work. You need to come up with fresh, quality materials on a regular basis, promote them, connect with readers, network with peers and mentors ? and that's before you even see a single dollar for your effort. I've put together some simple business tactics to [...]

Originally at: Blog Tips at ProBlogger

Set Your Blog for Success With These Simple Tactics

How Much Promotion Do You Do?

How much promotion do I do?

A lot!

Constantly.

Each and every day.

Where do I promote my lenses? MySpace, FaceBook, Freewebs, Blogger, WordPress, Proboards, NaNoWriMo, eBay community, chat rooms, message boards, forums, post-it notes in public restrooms, all the usual stuff.

~~~~~>^..^< The EelKat has spoken.

Wait . . . What? Did I Hear You Say Post-it Notes In Public Restrooms . . .WTH?

Yep. That's what I said.

Post-it notes in public restrooms.

Simple, easy, quick, and when you are on the road as much as I am, you know where every single public bathroom is at every single store, mall, gas station, library, fast-food take-out, and rest stop from York to Biddeford to Bangor to Arcadia and a little bit of New Hampshire and Vermont too. There is hardly a town, city, village, hamlet, or township in Maine that I have NOT left a trail of Post-it notes in public restrooms in. A family of 7 + lots of travel = lots of in the car time = lots of looking for public restrooms = "Hey! why not write the URL of my web sites on a whole package of Post-it notes and leave one in every restroom we stop at!"



  • "But does it work? Does it bring in any traffic?"


No idea.

No way to tell either.

The stats only tells me what sites sent me traffic, not if the folks were locals who visited those same public restrooms.

"Than why do it at all?"

Every little bit helps, and post-it notes are .99c for a pack of 100. That's a penny for each advertisement, you can't get much cheaper than that for paid advertising!

"So you do this, but you don't know if it brings traffic to your lenses?"

Yep. And you can make a guess as to wither or not this is working, by checking your lens stats. The stats do tell me if the lenses are getting "direct" traffic. Direct traffic is when someone types the URL to the lens in their address bar and comes to the lens directly, without searching for it or clicking on a link.

The lenses that get the most hits from "direct traffic" are also the same lenses I leave on Post-it notes. Now I ask you, how else are those lenses getting direct hits, if not from the Post-it notes?

Banners For Your Lenses & Places To Promote Your Squidoo Lenses:

Make banners for your lenses, and post the banners on your other lenses, your blogs, your MySpace, and any other web sites you may have.

Here are a few banners I use, and the link to the site where I make them. It's quick, it's easy, it's totally free, and I made each of these 2 banners in under 5 minutes!

For info on how to make banners for your own lenses check out this site: Make your own banner at MyBannerMaker.com!

Also, don't forget to submit the URL of your lenses to as many directories as possible. There are hundreds of free directories you can submit to, just search Google to find them. Here are the ones which I think are the best for Squidoo lenses:


Which of Your Lenses Gets the Most Traffic on a Regular Basis?

Here are my 5 most trafficked lenses of all time, which have gotten steady streams of traffic since the day I made them:

  • Sea Monster?
  • Sea Monsters... mermaids, sirens, kelpies, sea serpents... real or fiction? In this lens we shall explore the possability that sea monsters are real. Read our...
  • Phookas
  • Phookas are evil creatures from the Realms of Fae.  What is a Phooka? Why should you keep away from them? Read on and find out for yourself. On this lens...
  • Publishing Methods
  • How should you publish your book? Self-Publishing? Vanity Press? Traditional? POD-People? The Big Five? What's the difference? On this lens I explore the different...
  • Creating Character Profiles
  • A character is a person about whom you write. Every work of fiction (book, screenplay, SCA persona, RPG, LARP, MMORPG, video game, etc.) has characters in it....
  • Your First Goldfish
  • I love goldfish. They are such wonderful pets. This lens is for anyone who loves goldfish too, but was created specifically for those just getting started.

What Are Your Best Current Lensranks?

Here is the live RSS Feed, for my Top 10 lenses. This list is updated hourly based on current lensranks. These are the lenses of mine that are currently doing the best of all:

How to Start a Publishing Company

How to start a publishing company: I started my own small press publishing company. With the help of...

Creating Character Profiles

A character is a person about whom you write. Every work of fiction (book, screenplay, SCA persona,...

Sewing A Kimono: Step by Step Instructions

Second in my series of CosPlay lenses, here is my lens about the art of making a kimono. As this len...

Things Women DO NOT Like About Men

I think women have men running around in circles. Women say they want one thing and the next thing a...

Ultra Sexy Black Shoes

Ultra Sexy Hard to Find Fetish Shoes for Clubbing, Trannies, Dancers, Show Girls, Divas, Drag Queens...

The Top 5 NaNoWriMo Tools

Every November thousands of writers gather together to take part in the world's largest writing cont...

Creating a Fantasy Realm

Are you writing a fantasy novel? Have you joined NaNoWriMo and don't know what to do next? Do you ne...

Zazzle vs CafePress

Zazzle vs CafePress Zazzle is a print-on-demand manufacturer that allow you to create, share and cel...

25 Things I Carry in My Purse

After reading the "About Me" lens challenge, I have decided to take on the "25 Things I Carry in My...

Kimono Embroidery

I love embroidery and have been embroidering on a professional (non-career) level for more than 20 y...

How Do You Feel About Comments?

Me? I love comments. I love leaving comments. I love getting comments. I can't speak for other lensmasters, but I personally love getting comments that link to other lenses. Like everyone else, however, I like it when you leave relevant comments on my lenses.

Why are comments good? Lots of reasons.

Leaving comments can lead to conversations and new friendships.

Comments help drive more traffic to both lensmasters.

I often do not see typos and minor mistakes on my lenses, and am grateful to the lensmasters who left comments pointing them out so that I could fix them.

I've joined a lot of groups after the group master left a comment requesting my lens join their group.

I've found and feature lenses I didn't know were out there until the lensmaster posted a link in their comment requesting a link exchange.

I've made changes to lenses after being left comments about ideas I could do to make the lens better.

Comments are good. Comments are fun. Comments boost self esteem.

Does Leaving Comments on Other People's Lenses Effect Your Traffic Any?

Oh my, yes!


I leave comments on every lens which I give 5 stars too. That does not mean I give everyone 5 stars, what that means is, if I like the lens enough to give it 5 stars, than I also like the lens enough to tell it's creator why I liked it and why I gave it 5 stars.

Most every lensmaster whose lens I leave a comment on, usually stops by a few days later and leaves a comment on one or more of my lenses. So yes, leaving comments on other people's lenses most certainly drives some extra traffic to your own lens.

A word of caution here though: Don't go around leaving spam comments.

The Story of My Most Flamed Lens:

  • Flamers: Good For Lensrank?
  • It was a dark and stormy night, when I was struck by the Attack of the FanGirls. This is the story of how one long dead lens, suddenly and without warning,...

What Are Spam Comments and How Do I Avoid Leaving Them on People's Lenses?

A spam comment, is in the simplest of terms, a comment that is irrelevant and should not have been left in the first place.

Looking into spam comments farther, we find four different types of spam comments that are common on Squidoo.


  • #1) Drive By Spam
  • #2) Self Promotion Spam
  • #3) Spammy Spam Spam
  • #4) Flaming


What does each of these terms mean? Let's take a look:


#1) Drive By Spam


This kind of spam is by far the most common, most harmless, and also often, completely unintentional. Usually the commenter is not even aware that want they are doing is spam.

What is it? It is leaving a quick comment, such as one of the following:


  • "Great lens! 5*****"
  • "Cool"
  • "Nice Lens."
  • "Way to go man!"


As you can see, none of these comments really has anything wrong with them, however, none of them tells the lensmaster that you REALLY read their lens either.

Many people do not even consider this spam. Most lensmasters overlook it and let it pass. Only a few of the most strict lensmasters delete them. You are not likely to get banned by posting these kinds of comments.


#2) Self Promotion Spam

The second most commonly seen spam on Squidoo is self promotion spam. It is quite simply what it says it is and looks a lot like this:


  • "Great lens, visit mine at www.squidoo.com/URL"


It's a toss up as to how lensmasters will respond to this. Some think there is nothing wrong with it and will leave it on their lenses. Some don't like it and delete it. Some, get miffed and ban you. A few get mad and report you to Squidoo HQ.

I know of one lensmaster who actually gets super pissed and retaliates by visiting all of your lenses and giving each one a 1-star rate, just to spite you for leaving a link to your lens on one of their lenses! (This is called Flaming, see below.)


#3) Spammy Spam Spam

This is the type of spam that is against Squidoo ToS and could get you booted off Squidoo, all of your lenses deleted, and get your computer's ISP banned from ever being able to log in and create a new account ever again. This is True Spam. Spam in it's worst form. Spam, that can be reported to the FBI and result in up to 25 year in prison. Spam in it's true form is illegal and you can go to jail because of it.

What is "True Spam"? We all know it. We've all seen it. And we get dozens to hundreds of it in our email every single day. They are links to websites, with or without a comment. On Squidoo comments, it usually looks something like this:


  • "get free diet pills by clicking here!"
  • "hot pictures of hot girls"
  • "buy my eBook and make millions overnight!"


I do not know of any lensmaster who does not delete these comments and ban the poster.

Rarely have I seen this kind of spam posted by a lensmaster. Usually it is posted by a non-member. Often, it is not even posted by a human, but instead posted by a SpamBot. The most ferocious of all SpamBots is the one that reared it's ugly head in 2005 and became known simply as "The China SpamBot".

Normally these spam posts are harmless link, however, if the posts were left by the viscous China SpamBot, it could cost you your computer and in most severe cases, the host's site as well (in this case the host would be Squidoo.com). What makes The China SpamBot different from other spambots? The links it leaves are not links to regular spam websites, but rather links to viruses, which once clicked on, set out to downloading on your computer, copying all the passwords to all the webs sites you visit, and than erasing it's path, by erasing everything on your computer's hard drive. In some cases it has erased entire websites as well. The China SpamBot is the ultimate in spam, you'll know it when you see it, because it sends out links in Chinese characters, usually a long list of them, several hundred letters long, and containing links to 40 or 50 different sites. If you see this, report it to the FBI, and than delete it off your page. DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES CLICK ON THE LINK!

To date Squidoo's servers have been very good at stopping The China SpamBot from breaking in and there are no known cases of it ever being able to leave comments on lenses. We can thank Squidoo's team of techs for keeping Squidoo a safe haven for it's lensmasters.


#4) Flaming

Rarely is Flaming seen on Squidoo. The Squidoo community is built up of a more mature and intellectual group of people than you normally see on sites such as MySpace and Proboards where flaming wars are common and out of control.

What is Flaming? Flaming is essentially sending out hate mail to people for the sole purpose of being a mean faced bully and making people cry. People who flame others are known on the internet as "Trolls". Flame comments look something like this:


  • "get a life you dweeb!"

  • "I hate your stupid guts you f**** SoB! #@#^%()VCE@ and don't think I don't knOw whErE U LiVe CaUsE I do and I got pictures of your DoG and Kids Too!"

  • "You f***** santaic be-atch, God is going to reign brimstone and fire on your head and you well never escape hell, I'll see to that!"

  • "u r stupid I hate u"



Fortunately for all, flamers and trolls are pretty rare on Squidoo, and when they do strike, lensmasters are quick to delete them

My Most Hated LensesI have a fan! O_O (Lots of them!)

Originally just one, but now 2 of my lenses are hated and blasted with flames. Here they are (note that flames have been deleted):

What Makes a Good Comment?

A good comment is one that you wrote after you took the time to at least read a little bit of the lens.

Example:


  • "I really loved your take of the war with Iraq."

  • "That recipe for potato soup sounds so good, I'm going to make it for supper tonight! 5* to you!"



Both of those comments took about 5 seconds to type. They are quick, short, to the point, heart felt, and tell the lensmaster that you really did read their lens.

A really good comment would read something like this:



  • "I really loved your take of the war with Iraq. However I must say that I disagree with your statement that . . . because I feel that this . . ."

  • "That recipe for potato soup sounds so good, I'm going to make it for supper tonight! I remember my grandmother used to make a soup just like that when I was a little girl, but I was never able to find a recipe that sounded just right. I think this could be it! Thank you so much! 5* to you!"



These comments both tell the lensmaster that you read the lens, and open up the way for a conversation between the commenter and the lensmaster.

Remember, you are allowed 1,000 chars in a comment. that gives you room to say quite a bit!

And remember this too: Links in comments are not a bad thing!

Links in comments are not a bad thing!

*THUD*

Oh dear.

Half my readers just fainted.

I'll sit here and twiddle my thumbs while I wait for them to get over the shock of what I just said . . . oh look! an ice cream sandwich! I'll eat that while I wait.

AL-ERT!-AL-ERT!-THEY-HAVE-A-WOKEN!

EX-TER-MI-NATE!-EX-TER-MI-NATE!-EX-TER-MI-NATE!

KILL-THE-DOC-TOR!

Zaps Dalek with Sonic Screwdriver.

Good! You're awake again! You missed the war between the Daleks and the Time Lords while you were out of it. Let's continue . . .

I know, I just got off ranting about links in comments being spam, but not every link in every comment is spam. Spam is unwanted. Spam is off topic. Spam serves no purpose. Spam helps no one. And here's the shocker: Relevant links are NOT spam!

What is a relevant link?

If you have read a lot of my lenses, it won't be long before you see a pattern in my comment boxes. Not read enough to have noticed it yet? Well, I'll point it out to you than.

They are all the same! Every single comment box has the same message copied and pasted into it and here it is this (as copied off my Lord Sesshomaru Costume lens):




  • Like this lens? Want to share your feedback, or just give a thumbs up? Tell us what you liked about this article. Think of something we should add? Just want to say hi? Submit a blurb today!

  • I'm looking for some great on-topic lenses to add to my lensroll. Have you got a lens about InuYasha, CosPlaying, Japanese fashion history, Japanese swords, or costume making? Feel free to leave a link to it. Next time I log-in I'll stop by and check it out. I'll feature the ones that are on-topic for this lens, and lensroll most all lenses related to CosPlay, Japanese history, or sewing how-toos.

  • PS: Don't forget to leave a star rateing too. (See top of page). Thanks!

  • Want to Link to this Lens?

  • Here's the HTML code to copy and paste:

  • <a href="http://www.squidoo.com/LordSesshomaruCostume/" title="Lord Sesshomaru Costume">Lord Sesshomaru Costume</a>

  • Link to us from your blog, your MySpace page, your website, your forum sig, and every other place you can think of! Tell your friends about this page, spread the word!

  • Here is what your link will look like:

  • Lord Sesshomaru Costume

  • Got an idea you'd like to suggest for this lens? I'd love to hear it!


The first thing you notice is the kitty picture. He's cute and that's why he's there. The sudden addition of a pink winged kitten makes the read stop and say "What's this?". Now even if they haven't read anything else on the lens, all of a sudden they are reading the intro on my guestbook, and changes are good that they will now leave a comment.

So what exactly is it I've done here and why do I do it? Simple. The way I see it, people are going to leave links to their Squidoo lenses in your comment box, wither you like it or not, that's just the way life is.

Now you have several choices. You can rave and moan and get mad about it. You can ban them from ever commenting on your lenses again. You could just delete them and hope they never post again. . .or

You could do what I do and ASK people to leave links in your comment box. Yes, that's right, I actually tell my readers to go ahead and leave links in my comment box. Why? Well, for one thing, they are going do it anyways. There really is no reason to get mad at them, they just want you to check out their new lens after all. So if they are going to leave a link anyways, why not do what I do and I ask them to leave an on-topic link?

In the example shown above, links that would be on topic for that lens would include InuYasha, CosPlaying, Japanese fashion history, Japanese swords, or costume making, because that is the topic of that lens. I change the criteria to match the particular lens, but the rest is always the same.

As noted earlier, I feature a lot of lenses by other lensmasters on my lenses, and this is how I find those lenses: simply by people asking politely if I would check out their lens and consider adding it.

I also join a lot of groups from group owners putting a link in their comment to their group and requesting I join my lens to it.

Since I have started doing this I get a lot less spam comments too. Seeing that request for on-topic links in comments has just about stopped all off-topic links from being put in comments on my lenses!

Sharing the Link Love in Reverse or Asking for Back Links

Do not be afraid to ask for back links!

If people really do like you lens, chances are good that they will put a link to it on their blog . . . they may even write a review about it. If it's a lens they REALLY REALLY like a lot they may want to stick it on their MySpace profile or link to it from their sig on a forum they visit.

Make it easy for them, by putting the code to do so right on your lens!

Unfortunately the full code will not show up on the published page, as I need JavaScript to make the code display and Squidoo disables JavaScript. However, I can do this:

Look back at the message I copied off my Lord Sesshomaru Costume lens comment box. Do you see where a code is shown, followed by what the code looks like when pasted on your page? Here is how you make that show up on you Squidoo lens:

copy the code below, and paste it into your comment box's description section.


  • [code]&-lt;-a href=&-quot;http://www.squidoo.com/LordSesshomaruCostume/" title="Lord Sesshomaru Costume&-quot;&g-t;Lord Sesshomaru Costume&-lt;/a&g-t;[/code]

  • Here is what your link will look like:

  • [code]<a href="http://www.squidoo.com/LordSesshomaruCostume/" title="Lord Sesshomaru Costume">Lord Sesshomaru Costume</a>[/code]


Now remove the following from the code:


  • [code] (there are 2 of these)
  • [/code] (there are 2 of these)
  • and all of the dashes which look like this - (there are six of these)

  • change the URL to the URL of your Squidoo Lens
  • change the title to the title of your Squidoo lens

When you save and publish, you will get the code which your readers need to copy and paste, in order to link back to your lens, displayed on your comment box.

This is a quick and easy step to getting more free traffic to your lens, by letting others post your link on their own web sites.

You Mentioned Interacting With Your Readers. . .What Do You Mean By That?

I did? Where did I say that?

I think you're right. It does seem like I said that. I wonder where I said it?

Interacting with readers can be done in many ways. I'm doing it right now, by having a conversation with myself and the invisible reader who is asking the questions. It's weird but true, that by talking to yourself on your lenses, like I'm doing on this one, draws readers in to what you are saying and makes them feel like you are talking to them and them alone. A trick I picked up from writing fiction. Just write your lens as though you are writing dialog between two characters in your story.

That's one way to interact with your readers, here's another: Polls.

People love to vote on things. Everyone wants to make their vote count. How do I know this? I know this from the many forums I frequent. Here's an example of one forum topic that resulted in over 200 votes, and a near riot between side A voters and side B voters:


  • A few months ago, in February 2008, I believe it was, on a forum for anime fans, one member started a simple two answer poll which stated the following:

  • Who do you think is hotter: InuYasha or his evil brother Sesshomaru?

  • I of course joined in this poll and voted for Sesshomaru. After the first few days there was clearly a battle brewing between InuYasha's fans and Sesshomaru's fans, as the comment box under the poll, started to fill with why each was better than the other. About a week and 500 or so answers into the poll, flames where being thrown from one poster to another, as an all out war over which was the better dog demon broke out. It was in a word: hilarious!

  • It was to the point when, you'd expect the posters of these comments to jump out of the computers and attempt a sword duel with each other, when a by stander, and not a fan of either InuYasha or Sesshomaru, stepped in and posted a single, but very monumental comment which read:

  • "I've been reading these posts. What is wrong with you people? Don't you know these are cartoon characters? They are fiction! Fictional means not real! You do know that don't you? You crazed fan girls are acting like a pack of jilted lovers in a cat fight!"

  • He was right, we were (note I say we . . . I'm known as The Bride of Sesshomaru on that forum! LOL!). Needless to say, by mid-March, a moderator stepped in and the poll was closed and comment box locked, due to it being "an overly heated discussion".

And my point is? I've seen the same thing happen on polls and duel boxes here on Squidoo. By adding polls, guestbooks, and duel modules, you are inviting reader interaction. The more of these polls you use on your lenses, the more your readers will interact with you and other readers and the more they will come back to keep posting and keep interacting.

Squidoo knows that polls and comment boxes and duel modules are good for your lenses, which is why they created their sister site: Hey Monkey Brain! The whole point of the Monkey Brain lenses is to ask a question, give two possible answers, and than set people loose on the lens to debate their brains out over it.

One Last Question. What's With the Pictures on This Lens?And where do you get them?

What?

Why?

How dare you question my pictures! Snarls. Growls. Bares my long white teeth . . . oh . . . wait . . . no . . . wrong lens . . . I'm not CosPlaying a dog demon here am I? Let's try that again.

Pictures you say? Why? Is there something wrong with them?

"No."

Than, why'd you ask?

"Well, it's just that . . . they don't seem to match the topic of this lens, is all."

Aaahh! So you noticed that did you? Good. That means you were paying attention and you are about to learn one last thing about my Squidoo success:

PICTURES and LENS TOPIC RELEVANCY.

I use pictures on all of my lenses. Lots and lots of pictures. I take advantage of every available space that could fit a picture in it.

I always put a picture in the introduction box's logo space.

In the text modules, I make sure to always upload a picture.

Also in the text modules I make sure to add off-site hosted pictures. For this I use my PhotoBucket and ImageShack accounts.

I make use of the Polaroid module and add as many as possible.

I feature Amazon Spotlight items that have on-topic items, because of the big picture it adds to the lens.

When I feature lenses and lensmasters on my lenses, I'm more likely to feature them if they have loaded a picture into their intro box. If their lens is displaying the blank orange squid image, I'm likely to delete them off my lens.

And most important of all, I make sure that the pictures on my lenses are on-topic for the lens they are on, otherwise, my readers will do as you did on this lens, and do a double take and than wonder, why all these off-topic pictures are floating around for no reason at all.

I get my pictures from a lot of different sources. Some of the picture are screenshots off my DVDs (Pirates of the Carribean, InuYasha, etc), others came on copyright free discs I bought (animal-nature-travel pics etc), the ones with words and quotes I made on paint, the little moving smilie gifs were either made by a friend or found on a website that posts gifs to share, several pics came from a sig exchange site, a lot are scans from books and comic books I own (cover art, illustrations, etc) and the rest are my our art (paintings, drawings, and photographs made by me). I have a second hard-drive installed on my computer just for picture storage as my collection has over 300,000 images in it. I use them on all of my lenses.

As you may have noticed the pictures on this lens have nothing to do with the topic of the lens. I did that on purpose, to show you that, yes, these pictures look good, yes they are nice and colorful, yes they make the lens look better, but they also distract the reader, because they are off-topic.

The lesson here: Add pictures to your lens. People like to look at pictures. Add a lot of pictures to your lens. A single picture can speak louder than a thousand words. Put pictures everywhere . . . just make sure they are on-topic to the lens.

Be Relevant and On Topic in Everything!

When you add something to your lens, ask yourself:

Is it relevant?

Is it on-topic?

Does it help to get my message across to my readers?

If you answer no, to any of these questions than you should not be adding what ever it is to your lens.

In other words do not do this:

I love My Lord Sesshomaru Costume Lens and put this link here for no reason at all! :P

Reader Poll

Did you learn anything here?

Yes. I learned that you are insane, and I should never have asked you anything.   (7%)

7%

Yes, this lens was very helpful.   (78%)

78%

Uhm . . . I don't know, I was too distracted by the off topic pictures.   (6%)

6%

What? I'm sorry, I forgot everything I read when you jumped at me with those wolf fangs.   (4%)

4%

I'm am now more confused than ever.   (3%)

3%

Total Votes: 64

Reader Feedback

Like this lens? Want to share your feedback, or just give a thumbs up? Tell us what you liked about this article. Think of something we should add? Just want to say hi? Submit a blurb today!

PS: Don't forget to leave a star rating too. (See top of page). Thanks!

Want to Link to this Lens?

Here's the HTML code to copy and paste:

<a href="http://www.squidoo.com/EelKatSquidooSecrets/" title="EelKat''s Squidoo Secrets">EelKat''s Squidoo Secrets</a>

Link to us from your blog, your MySpace page, your website, your forum sig, and every other place you can think of! Tell your friends about this page, spread the word!

Here is what your link will look like:

EelKat''s Squidoo Secrets

Got an idea you'd like to suggest for this lens? I'd love to hear it!

For info on how to make banners for your own lenses check out this site: Make your own banner at MyBannerMaker.com!

This lens supports The Pidgie Fund:

Hymal Keydar: Dog Demon of the North

A wild Human girl with no manners, Dawa runs from the city guards, wanted for the crime of stealing bread, right into the arms of Hymal Keydar, a wandering prince from the Himalayas Alps. Seeing that the half starved girl is guilty of nothing more than being hungry, the strange prince buys the girl from the guards. 

Fearing her new life as the prince's slave, Dawa finds herself treated like a princess, by a man with many dark secrets and a bevy of bounty hunters keeping him on the run.