Writing Dialogue, Monologuing Characters, & Preposition Abuse

By Wendy C Allen

f you are here looking for aliens, ufos, demons, cryptids, haunted cars, curses, Etiole, the wild man of old orchard beach, the goldeneagle car, the white monkey, or any of that other weird bullshit, you want this video:

...and after that video, you want these ones:

@eelkat #etiole #homelesspeople #homelessness #homelessinmaine #homeless #oldorchardbeach #maine #forest #leanto #homelesslivesmatter #homelessman #den #hermit #mainehermit #mainemountainman #mountainmen #mainelife #mainelifestyle #mainehomeless #homelesscommunity #homelesscrisis #homelessveteran #homelessveteranawareness #homelessawareness #homelesselder #homelesselderly ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

@eelkat 1964 #Dodge 330 that people call "Goldeneagle" or "world's most haunted car" #maine #artcar #volvo #antiquecars ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

Wendy Christine Allen, 2019, able to sit up in a chair for the first time in years, and able to raise up my arm and wiggle fingers. This was when I started playing Witcher 3 on Twitch as part of my physical therapy to regain finger movement. Playing Witcher 3 daily from 2016 to 2019, is how I regained the use of my thumb and two for fingers on my right hand... it is also why I stopped playing Witcher 3 in 2019, once I had strengthen my two forefingers enough to start typing again. Wendy Christine Allen, Old Orchard Beach's Autistic Author, Artist, Illustrator, & Art Car Designer Counting Down to the September 23, 2028 50th Anniversary of my first published book (September 23, 1978) If you are here looking for The Twighlight Manor series, The Crystonite Wars series, The Wild Years series, The White Rock Asylum for the Criminally Insane series, The Twisted Tales series, the Captured By a MerMan series, The Space Dock 13 series, The Kats of Planet Ptarmagin series, the stories about Miss Citten the Eel-Kat, or the stories about Etiole... ALL of those series were combined and consolidated into The Adventures of Quaraun the Insane Pink Necromancer series in 2014, so ALL the different series, are now under one series title. List of the published titles still in print: The Index of over three thousand stories in The Pink Necromancer series What the series is about, for those new here: The introduction to The Pink Necromancer Series.

If you want some stories to get you started in The Pink Necromancer series, reading these first will give you a good introduction to the 3 main characters: BoomFuzzy's Chowder Dilemma If your ass ain’t freezing or your brains ain’t scrambled, you’re ain’t really trying A Very Important Clump of Grass The Washer Woman & The Fae Absinthe Slushies: An Ode to Frozen Green Fairy Wine Bone Dice Excited For The New Baby Zwodder: A Drowsy Stupid State of Mind Pink Sheep, Cheesy Burritos, and The Grim Reality of Zombies Open Grave The Phooka's Dragon School The Moon Goddess Laughs From The Rooftops The Jar of Pickled Toes The Book Burning Maggots, a You Can't Spell Hatred Without Red Hats A Day In The Life of a Bumbling Necromancer The Three-Seventeen Pee Expedition

My Elves Are JellyFish...and I asked Google AI and ChatGPT 5.6 what they thought of this.

As requested, my daily writing prompt series is now available print paperback editions on Amazon.

365 Cozy Writing Prompts For Fantasy Writers Vol.1: Daily Writing Prompts Series For Writers of Serial Pulp Fiction

365 Cozy Writing Prompts For Fantasy Writers Vol.2: Daily Writing Prompts Series For Writers of Serial Pulp Fiction

365 Cozy Writing Prompts For Fantasy Writers Vol.3: Daily Writing Prompts Series For Writers of Serial Pulp Fiction

365 Cozy Writing Prompts For Fantasy Writers Vol.4: Daily Writing Prompts Series For Writers of Serial Pulp Fiction

365 Cozy Writing Prompts For Fantasy Writers Vol.5: Daily Writing Prompts Series For Writers of Serial Pulp Fiction

There are 20 volumes of this writing prompt series currently planned and in varying stages of finishing, hopefully all 20 will be published by the end of 2026. I likely will do a 2nd series of writing prompt books in 2027.

Coming soon (Nov/Dec 2026)... patterns for my slow stitched embroidery:

The first of the Visual Novels/Video Games for The Adventures of Quaraun the Inane/The Pink Necromancer series is published and available on Itch.io, there are 3 more planned for release in 2026, 6 more planned for release in 2027, and the big 60-hour 80k word 150 page one (Quaraun Goes To the Fair) is planned for a 2028 release.

There is a Pink Necromancer card game and a Pink Necromancer board game, as well as a Pink Necromancer table top RPG supliment for Dungeons and Dragons, all in the works, and to be released over the next couple of years as well.

I shouldn't have to say this, but people keep contacting me, so apparently I do:

• No, I do not believe in aliens. Stop contacting me to ask for alien information. If you believe in aliens, I think you are insane, retarded, or both.

• No, my car is not haunted. I've debunked that rumour many times now. . Stop contacting me to ask for haunted car information. If you believe in haunted cars, I think you are insane, retarded, or both.

• No, I am not connected to Stephen King. I didn't even know who he was until you idiots started contacting me asking about him. I had to look him up on Google to find out what you were even talking about! If you have questions about Stephen King, go contact him and ask him. I'm not him. I don't know him. I know nothing about him. I've never read one of his books. I've never seen one of his movies. I can't figure out why you people are even coming to me to ask about him in the first place!

1. If someone told you I believe in aliens, if someone told you my car was haunted, if someone told you I was connected to Stephen King, you NEED to contact the FBI agent in charge of my son's murder investigation and TELL HIM WHO it was who told ou, exactly WHAT it was they said, HOW they contacted you, WHERE they contacted you... because it is a KNOWN FACT that my son's murderer is the one who started all these slanderous alien, haunted car, Stephen King rumours, and the FBI is trying to catch her.

If you have any information about my son’s murderer, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

Do you know who this woman is?

On August 8, 2013 she drove a backhoe over my house. On November 14, 2013 she arrived at Southern Maine Community College and crippled me with a golf club and murdered my son. One June 24, 2016, days after my first attempts to walk again, she attacked me with a shopping cart at Scarborough, Walmart, reinjuring the Nov 14, 2013 injury.

She crippled me when I was 8 months pregnant, a woman with a golf club, severed my spine and bashed my baby's head in, I spent 9 years relearning to walk, and the FBI is 13 years into the murder investigation and not yet id-ed the attacker who crippled me and killed my baby, both violently with a golf club.

Complete details of EVERYTHING she did is on this page here.

The golf club woman who called herself Clair as she looked November 14, 2013. Her hair is a weird chin leangth pageboy (very Medival style cut) platinum blonde with wide brown/black dyed stripes in it (like a reverse of Lily Munster, but the stripes are several, almost like a zebra). I am 5'6" and she was a LOT taller then me, like closer to the height of a man; she had thin lips like a man, and large nose like a man... she COULD have been a man disguised as a woman, given the ease with which she severed my spine....she's is a LOT stronger then is typical for a woman). She was wearing a chambre blue denim "blazer jacket over shirt" and a button up mens shirt (possibly flannel) and blue jeans. The bulk of her yelling was focused on accusing me of being transgender, even while ripping my baby out of my 8 month pregnant belly and bashing his head in with a golf club.

The Claire woman as she looked during her shoping cart attack at Scarborough WalMart June 2016, the attack with left me paralyzed and in a wheelchair. Her hair was dyed dark red, and she drove away in a gold Volvo 240 Station Wagon of a late 1980s/early1990s model, with a "458" on the lisnce plate.... If you have any information about the woman who crippled me with a golf club, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

@eelkat part 9 of 10 #dogwalk around the block (Maine st, Elm st, South street, Bradbury st) #Biddeford #Maine #night #fbiinvestigation #truecrimetiktok ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

If you have any information about the woman who crippled me with a golf club, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

Good god! We just found out about yet another slanderous rumour this woman has been spreading? When does it end? How many more of these things are out there?

Video explains what else she's done ...

If you have any information about the woman who crippled me with a golf club, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

If you encounter anyone claiming my car is haunted, demon possessed, or somehow connected to Stephen King please give the information of who, when, where/location to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office. @eelkat part 7 of 10 #dogwalk around the block (Maine st, Elm st, St Mary's, Dunkin, South street, Bradbury st) #Biddeford #Maine #night #plannedparenthood ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author If you encounter anyone claiming I believe in aliens or was an alien abducttee, please give the information of who, when, where/location to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

@eelkat part 4 of 10 #dogwalk around the block (Maine st, Elm st, St Mary's, Dunkin, South street, Bradbury st) #Biddeford #Maine #night #library ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author If you know who drove this backhoe over my house at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine 04064-1520 on August 8, 2013 please give the information of who it is to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office. If you know who drove this backhoe over my house at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine 04064-1520 on August 8, 2013 please give the information of who it is to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

I am sick and tired of people not giving a shit that my son was murdered!

I am sick and tired of jackasses making up rumours and lies about me and my car, calling me an alien abductee and my car haunted, just to try to cover up my son's murder!

Writing Dialogue, Monologuing Characters, Yelling Characters,  Preposition Abuse, and Other thoughts on writing character's speaking.

Writing Dialogue, Monologuing Characters, Yelling Characters,  Preposition Abuse, and Other thoughts on writing character's speaking.

>>>(HELP!) Capitalization in dialogue? Exclamation points? Neither?

>>>I'm writing an intense scene currently where someone is screaming. First, I typed it with exclamation points in the dialogue, but it looked wrong. It also didn't seem to capture how intense the screaming was. So I replaced it so that it was all in capitalization, but that seemed *worse* somehow. It looked cheesy.

>>>Any advice on what I should do, or if I should avoid capitalization/exclamation points in dialogue?

I’m going to show you HOW to use all caps CORRECTLY, in writing. Pay attention to how I write this post. SEE if you can pick up on what the CORRECT use of all cap words is.

Grammar rules specify you use an exclamation mark to show shock or surprise and NOT yelling or screaming. It is used ONLY with the exclamation tag. The first word after is capitalized as an exclamation point ends the dialogue like a period or question mark.

For example, THIS is correct:

• * “Oh my god!” She exclaimed when she saw the mess they had made.

Meaning THESE are incorrect:

• * “Oh my god!” She screamed...

• * “Oh my god!” She yelled...

• * “Oh my god!” She shouted...

Also, never use multiple exclamation points.

Thus THIS is incorrect:

• * “Oh my god!!!!” She screamed...

And ALWAYS spell out the entire word. NEVER use acronyms or text speech when writing dialogue.

THIS is incorrect, even though the use of the exclamation point IS correct:

• * “OMG!” She exclaimed...

All caps in literature are utilized to emphasize 4 or fewer words in a sentence to show that word is more important that the rest. (See my examples above throughout this post). In dialogue it is used to show that the character ACCENTED a word while speaking. Similar to how a comma is used, to show that they paused briefly while speaking BECAUSE they wanted the other character to pay attention to that one word. It tells the reader to pause and focus on the word, but to not pause as long as one would for a comma. All caps are never used to show the character as shouting, screaming, or otherwise raising their voice.

For example, THIS is correct:

• * “Pay attention to THIS word here,” the teacher said to her student as she pointed to the misspelled word in their essay. “What is wrong with it?”

The use of all caps to indicating yelling was invented by Yahoo for their Yahoo Messenger chat rooms in 1997. It did not exist in published media prior to this. If you submit a manuscript to a publisher with this type of grammar errors, they will probably toss your manuscript in the trash. Not even bother sending you a rejection letter.

Publishers, as a general rule, don’t like to waste their time on writers who can be bothered to learn basic grammar rules. So, if you plan to pro publish, do be sure to edit things like that out.

The correct way to show that a character screamed is simply to use the appropriate tag and put it before the dialogue so that the reader knows ahead of time to think of the character yelling.

For example:

•  * She saw the mess then yelled: “What did you two do, while I was gone?”

•  * The child ran towards the street. Her mother screamed to her: “Get back here.”

Buy a high school textbook for “English Grammar & Composition” class, any grade 7 to 12 will do. After 7th grade most are close enough to the same that it doesn’t matter which grade level the book says it is. They contain the basic rules of grammar. Each chapter has exercises you can do to practice the grammar rules.

Best way to learn how to write, really is to buy high school Grammar & Composition text books. Do the exercises. 

It’s what I do. I do them daily. I go through 10 or 12 high school textbooks a year. Plus, I take classic literature (Poe, Wells, Dickens, etc.) and diagram 100 sentences a day from them. Been doing it for 40+ years. It keeps the grammar rules always fresh in my head. Keeps me constantly honing my skill. Practising my craft even when I’m not writing something to publish, so that I never get rusty.

I never went to school.

No child does in Gypsy culture. Something I’ve been trying to convince parents to change.

They just don’t see any reason to learn to read or write or do Maths or tell time or dates/calendars. They aren’t things we use in everyday life. They are horse, sheep, and poultry farmers. Grow all their own food. Make all their own cloths. No one has electricity or plumbing. Most don’t even have houses, just live in tents.

So, I was an adult before I learned the basics of grammar. I had to teach myself by buying high school textbooks.

When I started out, I drove to a local high school, told them I wanted to learn to read and write, but was too old for school. Asked them, did they have any old textbooks they were going to throw away that I could have?

They took me into the school library. They had a huge section of free books.

They said: “Bring your car up to that door over there, we’ll load it up, you can take them all. Students already took what they wanted.” They gave me over 300 textbooks for every topic and every grade imaginable and lots of novels. They told me they had adult education classes at night, they were free, come sign up. I did.

I got my GED a few months later. I was 37 years old.

Ever since, I made it a goal to buy a new grammar text book every month and complete the whole thing. I’ve done it ever since. Today, I’m not only one of the few Gypsies who can read and write, I’m one of the few to ever be published. But I wouldn’t be, if I hadn’t had the dedication to devote myself to learning grammar.

I think a lot of people, who grew up being able to go to school, take for granted, what a gift it is to not only be able to read and write but also to know good grammar. Devote yourself to learning and practising grammar rules. You’ll become a far better writer than you thought possible.

So, I was over on Reddit, you like I often am, and found this question. And answered it, like I do. However, the answer I initially gave was a simple generic answer. If you want to read my original answer unaltered, simply click on Reddit's embed feature links which Reddit provides for webmasters to be able to post their answers on their websites, while linking back to the original thread on Reddit (if you didn't know Reddit offered and encouraged the use of this feature, look for it in the "share" features underneath every post, comment, and reply on Reddit).

I am answering random questions today about world building, over on Reddit and decided to take my answers from there and expand upon them even further over here. So that's what this page is. Me rambling on about various aspects of world building techniques I use when writing the Quaraun series. The questions I am answering are embedded here. Clicking the link in the embedded question will take you to the original Reddit page where you can see the original answer along with other people's answers. If you wish to comment, you can do so on the Reddit page where a place to do so is provided.

In any case, as with all of my Reddit answers found on my site here, my original post on Reddit is much shorter then the article here.

Writing Dialogue, Monologuing Characters, & Preposition Abuse

I have a rather opinionated and long answer, but hopefully it'll help. I have a degree in Teaching High School English Literature & Grammar. I'm seeing some grammar issues in your posts here, which, probably are happening in your novel writing, and may be what is causing your character dialogue issues.

Question: Are you still in high school? If so, please focus on your grammar classes. If not, what grade did you get at graduation and is there a local community center, adult ed classes, GED center, where you can take grammar classes? You, do need them. You don't talk like a high schooler. Your vocabulary, you talk like someone in their 30s or 40s but you have grammar issues common with high schools. You have the vocabulary of someone very well read, someone who probably has a college degree in Maths or Sciences, but struggles with Grammar rules. If that makes sense.

And could I ask: Is it possible your native language is French? You're making a HUGE amount of grammar errors, but one is standing out. It's commonly referred to as "back handed double talk", and it's some VERY common with French speakers who have recently learned English. It involves a lot of subject-verb reversal, and putting words in the wrong order to such an extreme that the sentences become almost completely unreadable. And you don't appear to be aware that you are doing it.

For the most part, your grammar is good, but the parts that are in error, are unusual errors for native English speakers to make, but are very common from French to English speakers to make. Over explaining a thing is common in French to English speakers, because they are uncertain if they said the correct word, so they say the word, then describe what the word meant. It results in insanity loooooooooong sentences. 30 words. 40 words. 50 words. You haven't yet typed a 70 word sentence here at least.

For example:

This seems to be especially true for my experience due to the nature of the science fiction setting and plot as well as the type of characters and their levels of involvement being somewhat direct at times.

37 words to say:

"In my experience sci-fi characters can be quite direct."

9 words.

I get the impression based on your phraseology, grammar usage, and writing style, that you are quite well read in the classics, like Edgar Allan Poe, Robert Louis Stevenson, Charles Dickens, Benjamin Franklin, but don't read modern literature much. It almost looks like you originally spoke French and taught yourself English by reading classic literature.

Your OP is written in monologue format. A very outdated style that has not been seen in published novels since the mid-1800s. Seeing how most people write the same way they talk in conversations, I'm guessing you are someone who in a conversation, talks a lot, talks very fast, and is too focused on what you are saying to notice when or if the other person is talking. The thing that cues me into this is all the compound, run-on sentence, and a near complete lack of any use of punctuation. This is a typical speech and writing pattern of men who are tuned into Science. Men who like to analyze and study things and tend towards a very scientific outlook to everything in life. This makes them very good in Science, Math, and Technology, but often they struggle with Grammar.

When a person is prone to scientific thinking patterns, they tend to talk very fast, very long, and over other people, and they have a tendency to write exactly the same way they talk, so in their writing, often do not use periods or commas, because they only stop the writing in place where they stop talking, but because their brain is going very fast, they don't naturally stop talking here a period should be, thus they both talk and write in very long run-on sentences.

I think this is what you are doing.

And I think... this is the issue you are seeing in your dialogue in your novel.

None of this is a bad thing, it just means you have a very scientifically creative brain, which is a good thing and helps you envision your novel before you write it. But it can trip you up when writing, resulting in a higher than normal need for editing later on.

Here's what I think is happening and how I would go about fixing it. I think you are someone with a very active brain, that is always thinking, always pushing forward, sometimes so fast that you can't keep up. Before you've finished typing one sentence your brain is already thinking 3 sentences ahead, so you have to write fast to keep up. Without realizing it, you inadvertently start writing in a quai-shorthand fashion, where you stop using articles, periods, and commas. And you write an entire paragraph as though it were one 50 word long sentence. (Count the words of each sentence in your post and you'll see what I mean.) What should be 10 sentences, suddenly is one long monologued mess. And while you are in the flow of writing, you don't realize it is happening.

But then, when you go back to read what you wrote, then you see it. Then you realize: "Something ain't right here. How do I fix this?"

When I was in college a writing teacher (who was also a bestselling novelist) gave a bit of advice that I found helps, and perhaps will help you with this issue. What he said was this:

"When writing novels always follow the rule of 7. Have no more than 7 words per sentence. No more than 7 sentences per paragraph. No more than 7 paragraph per scene. No more than 7 scenes per chapter."

He said: "If your sentence has more than 7 words, you are using too many adverbs, adjectives, conjunctions, and prepositions."

This sentence for example has 41 words in it:

Many characters can either be explaining or reasoning with each other at length resulting in what on paper seems like a monologue or court argument but in reality they can be speaking as plainly or exaggerated as I to you.

If your characters in your novel, talk like ^THIS, it's easy to fix. Here, I'll fix it:

Many characters reason with each other at length. The text looks like a monologue or court argument. They are speaking as plainly as I am.

Sentence 1 = 8 words

Sentence 2 = 8 words

Sentence 3 = 8 words

You now have 3 sentences instead of 1, and a word count of 24 instead of 41. Simply by changing passive voice to active voice and correcting the grammar errors. And it can be cleaned up more.

As an example: One chapter I have found great difficulty with involves a non-criminal related closed door committee of people and the description of an event that occurred and why it happened. The details discussed provide some world building and character development as one disagrees with involvement while the another has hidden proof but does not wish to implicate the other publicly as it would potentially slow down their objectives. They do however need to convince the committee that the event occurred and could have been prevented so they can help push support for preventing future related events. In this case writing dialog last may have been difficult?

You are writing in what is known as "backhanded double talk", I'm not sure if you realize that. If your characters are doing the same thing, again, simply correcting the grammar errors will completely fix the problem. I'll fix this post and show you what I mean:

• As an example 
• Should be: For example (3 words becomes 2)
• One chapter I have found great difficulty with involves a non-criminal related closed door committee of people and the description of an event that occurred and why it happened. 
• Should be: I have difficulty with one chapter. It involves a non-criminal, closed-door committee. (30 words in 1 sentence becomes 12 words in 2 sentences.)
• The details discussed provide some world building and character development as one disagrees with involvement while the another has hidden proof but does not wish to implicate the other publicly as it would potentially slow down their objectives. 
• Should be: Worldbuilding and character development occur during the discussion. (38 words becomes 8 words.)
• They do however need to convince the committee that the event occurred and could have been prevented so they can help push support for preventing future related events. 
• Should be: 28 words completely removed.
• In this case writing dialog last may have been difficult? 
• Should be: ??? This sentence causes me to ask if English is your first language? I could translate it into proper Grammar, if I could figure out what it was you meant to say. It's like you put this sentence from your native language into Google translate, changed it to something, not English, then translated it to English from that. It's gibberish. It's literally words thrown at a dartboard and arranged however they landed, with no subject or verb and just does not convey any clear message at all.

On the other hand, part of me thinks your brain is just thinking so damn fast, that your hands can't keep up, and so, some of your sentences come out like this, because your brain has sped off ahead and your fingers in their rush to catch up, just typed whatever and kept on going. Again, this is VERY common with someone who has a Scientific mind you probably have a very high IQ, actually. This sort of writing error is common with high IQ people. It's fairly common for someone with an IQ over 135 to make these sorts of writing errors and very simply caused by their brain thinking too many thoughts at once and their fingers getting confused and typing bits and pieces of each thought at once.

I've seen this sort of error before. There's a guy I work with, everybody thinks he's kind of crazy, he's very eccentric, but OMG! You start tossing Math and Science equations at him and you can't keep up. His brain just goes woooosh, past you. He's been trying for years to become a police officer. So, he gets to the point of taking the State police exam, and they tell him, well, you gotta take an IQ test. He scores 148 on the IQ test and they tell him: "You're a frigging genius, we can't higher you." He's like: "What? Why?" And they explain to him, that because of the way his brain works, he wouldn't make a good cop, because he over thinks things, analyzes everything, and likely suffers from writing issues. They tell him, a lot of the job is writing up police reports, and people with a mind like his, can't sit down and write a 3 page report because over alizes the situation and end up turning in a 300 page essay instead of a 3 page report, because they over explain everything. Well, this guy, I've seen his writing. He writes a piece of a sentence, and ends it with the piece of another sentence... and there should have been 2 or 3 sentences in between that never got written, because his finger couldn't keep up with his brain.

Anyways, that's what the last sentence there reminded me of. I'm getting the impression you are like this guy. High IQ, Scientific, and thinks a lot.

End result 5 sentences totalling 109 words, is now 3 sentences totaling 22 words without changing the meaning.

This:

As an example: One chapter I have found great difficulty with involves a non-criminal related closed door committee of people and the description of an event that occurred and why it happened. The details discussed provide some world building and character development as one disagrees with involvement while the another has hidden proof but does not wish to implicate the other publicly as it would potentially slow down their objectives. They do however need to convince the committee that the event occurred and could have been prevented so they can help push support for preventing future related events. In this case writing dialog last may have been difficult?

Is now this:

For example: I have difficulty with one chapter. It involves a non-criminal, closed-door committee. Worldbuilding and character development occur during the discussion.

Can you see what I did?

If not, here's what I did:

• All unnecessary exposition and irrelevant explanations have been removed.
• Rarely is more than one preposition needed per sentence. I removed all unnecessary prepositional phrases.
• A preposition must have an object. I removed all free standing, objectless prepositions.
• Pre-position means place before. I removed all reversed prepositional phrases that ended instead of began, with a preposition.
• I removed all back handed double talk.
• to, the preposition and to, the infinitive are not the same; I've removed those as well.
• A preposition is followed by a "noun". It is NEVER followed by a verb. I've removed these as well.
• I added punctuation. Commas where you need to remind your brain to slow down and pause. Periods in places where you need to tell your brain to come to a full stop and take a deep breath. People who talk fast, often forget to pause or stop in their conversations and then do the same thing in their writing. A lot of grammar teachers calling "the New York conversation" because New Yorkers talk this way and often write this way.

Your biggest problem is you have absolutely no clue how, when, or where to use a preposition. You are literally tossing words on the page with no regards to where they should be. And it's killing your writing. It makes your writing style VERY difficult to read.

I think, if you were to brush up on how, when, and where to use prepositions, and simply just start using commas and periods, I think you'll find your writing dialogue is going to improve immensely.

These should help get you started, but definitely invest in a Grammar textbook (college) preferably one with a heavy use of diagramming sentences.

THIS is what a diagramed sentance looks like if you've never seen one:

http://www.k12reader.com/worksheet/sentence-diagramming-guide/view/

it's something you would have been taught in 5th grade, but most 5th graders think it is boring so ignore it, and then as adults wonder why they have trouble with grammar rules.

Instructions for how to diagram a sentence:

https://www.thoughtco.com/how-to-diagram-a-sentence-1856964 .

I HIGHLY recommend, you take the chapter that is causing you trouble, and diagram EVERY SINGLE sentence of it. If's what your editor is gonna do if you plan to publish. By the end of the day, I guarantee your characters will have stopped monologuing and will be speaking more clearly. Nothing cures writing problems, like digraming your entire novel as part of the editing process.

This app (free), may help you fix you character dialogue issues: https://www.microsoft.com/en-us/store/p/sentence-diagrammer/9nblggh10hzs

But here's some help with prepositions, that should fix a lot of your characters' dialogue issues:

http://www.grammarbook.com/grammar/probPrep.asp

http://www.grammar-monster.com/lessons/prepositions.htm

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Category:English_prepositional_phrases

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Category:English_phrasal_prepositions

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_English_prepositions

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Preposition_and_postposition

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Category:English_prepositions

https://www.englishclub.com/grammar/prepositions-rule.htm

https://www.englishclub.com/grammar/prepositions-rules.htm

http://grammar.yourdictionary.com/parts-of-speech/prepositions/rules-for-prepositions.html

Yep. May be excessive.

You took 48 words to say: "My writing may be excessive." (5 words.)

And yes, I am aware of the fact that my post here, is ironic, as it is itself, excessive. But, hey, it takes one to know one, eh?

I have a problem being long winded and wordy in my writing (you've probably noticed). My drafts are a nightmare. They require so much editing. So much re-writing. So much removing excessive wordiness.

I completely understand when you say:

although my reddit style is of the slightly absurd variety, I can say that my normal writing style is not

I feel your pain.

Now...

Let's take something else into consideration.

All of what I have just said up to this point, are changes you would make if you wanted your novel writing in perfect English Grammar.

The question now becomes... but do you want it written in perfect English Grammar?

No one can answer that but you.

There is a market for long winded prose. And you are clearly very good at writing this style. It's a Literary market, so it's not as big as a genre fiction market. But it's out there, and it does like reading long winded fiction.

Anyone who is a fan of Edgar Allan Poe, LOVES 13 pages long sentences. That's not a joke. The Fall of House of Usher, contains a 13 page long sentence. Several hundred words in one single sentence.

Have you considered the possibility that, you don't NEED to change anything about your writing style?

I mean, I listed the things that need changing, because, well, you asked. But does changing your novel out of the style you wrote it in, and into perfect English Grammar actually improve the story or not?

If you have a character who monologues and rambles on, filling pages with text... well, that kind of says a lot about that character's personality. Their thought process. And you yourself said, the long monologue was important to character development.

The details discussed provide some world building and character development as one disagrees with involvement while the another has hidden proof but does not wish to implicate the other publicly as it would potentially slow down their objectives.

What I wished to accomplish was world building in a more interactive means involving the main characters instead of getting it from the narrator that just feeds background information. It is information expected to come from dialog within this setting and actually helps push the importance of what the event involved. I don't want to just say that a character described this and that. If the character has passion for or against what he/she is saying then they should do so right?

Here's a thought... have you considered reading stage play scripts?

A stage play has a paragraph of scene description on the first page, followed by dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, dialogue, and oh look, more dialogue.

Before I wrote novels, I started out writing stage play scripts. I LOVE live theatre, so that's where I started out. And it shows. A lot. When you read my published novels. The fact that I started out in theatre before novels sticks out like a sore thumb.

You want to know something about my novels? They are almost entirely dialogue. There is no narrator, because there are no descriptions. None outside of dialogue at least. Even when the dialogue stops, and some non-dialogue shows up, the non-dialogue is nothing but the internal thoughts of the character who just stopped talking. It's called "head hopping" and boy am I ever good at writing it.

If you start looking for it, you'll quickly find that most authors freak out and preach the evils of "head hopping" and say, no, no, no, no, no, don't EVER do that! No! Shame on any one who does! But does that stop me from writing it? Nope. Why? Because it fits the main character. He's a drug addict and he often is uncertain if he is in his own head or not. It's an unusual writing style, yes, and perhaps it should be avoided in most novels, but for the series in question, it works. It fits with the theme of the story, to have a non-traditional writing style going on.

The point is, it sounds to me, like you are writing in a very non-traditional style, and it also sounds like, you are only considering changing it because you are comparing what your text looks like when compared to other novels, right?

What I wished to accomplish was world building in a more interactive means involving the main characters instead of getting it from the narrator that just feeds background information. It is information expected to come from dialog within this setting and actually helps push the importance of what the event involved. I don't want to just say that a character described this and that. If the character has passion for or against what he/she is saying then they should do so right?

Charles Dickens once wrote a character who had a passion for watching ripples in the water...and then spent 24 pages of none stop one character dialogue as that character stood on a bridge and described every ripple in the water below.

Charles Dickens is considered one of the great classic writers whom all writers should strive to write like. This logic tells us that we should therefore all write characters who self-dialogue on their favourite things for 24 pages without interruption. Why then does no one do this? Because it's as boring to read someone gushing over a passion as it is to listen to a real life person doing it.

Thus you have long boring, dull blocks of dialogue like this:

If one character in your novel is doing it, then this is a good opportunity to show this character as dry, dull, and boring. Having other character interrupt him saying "It's getting late" trying to drop hints, but him just continuing to talk and talk and talk and talk...

Can you see how boring it would be if I just let him done on and one describing every shape and colour of every item he mentioned? Because this character is hell bent of world building and describing everything, this character is seen by the reader as a dull bore. So this is an example of how sometimes you WANT a character monologuing and describing things, because you want to show that the character is annoying.

Normally in most novels, your dialogue should be quick and snappy and look like this:

Can you see how instead of it being one long droning passage by one character, I've now broken it up onto a quick, snappy exchange of conversation between 3 characters?

If you go through the dialogue of your novel, you shouldn't see any blocks of text, but rather should see lots of tiny snappy sentences going back and forth between characters.

In real life conversation, people jump in and it's rare anyone gets to the end of a sentence before someone else starts to speak.

All of your dialogue passages should bounce back and forth between characters very quickly, with each character saying only about 7 words before the next character starts talking.

If you have any passages of dialogue that contain more then 20 words before changing character, you need to find ways to re-write those blocks of text to create more realistic and easier to read dialogue exchanges.

In real life, people do not talk in long uninterrupted speeches. And when a person does do that, they are self absorbed, not paying attention to the people around them, and are usually coming off as a "know it all jerk who won't let anyone else speak"... and in your novel, a character who says more then 20 words before the dialogue changes characters, is going to be seen by your readers as a "know it all jerk who won't let anyone else speak". Thus the only time you would have a character monologuing is if you want to convey to your readers that he is a "know it all jerk who won't let anyone else speak".

My own dialogue in my novels, tends to be super short, very quick and snappy, with the back forth moving very quickly. He's a scene to show you what I mean by that:

"Never understood that. An Elf attracted to a Phooka. That just ain't done.”

“My father didn't like BoomFuzzy.”

“And that be why ya was with him? To spite ya faddah?”

“Yeah. At first. He'd cut my hair. I met BoomFuzzy later that same day.”

“Ya was pissed about ya hair. I remember that. It were all ya talkit of for weeks.”

“I knew he was a Faerie as soon as I saw him. I knew he was lying to me about the genie bottles. I knew the way he wanted them built was only used for Liches' phylacteries. I knew having a male lover was forbidden. And I knew if I did all those things, it would really annoy my father. It took 25 years to get my hair this long and he just cut it. Beat me unconscious and cut my hair while I couldn't do anything to stop him.”

“Ya was playing BoomFuzzy as much as he were playing ya.”

“At first, yes. But I did love him. I don't know when I started loving him.”

"Ya loved him quite a lot."

"I did."

"Ya bound ya soul to him."

"I did."

"Why did ya do that?"

"Elves have a psychic connection. A hive mind, the Humans call it. If one Elf hurts, every Elf in the clan can feel it. When one Elf is happy, all the Elves in the clan feel the same joy. I knew BoomFuzzy wasn't an Elf, because he wasn't connected to the clan. For an Elf there is no worse thing then to be outed by your clan, to be cut off, alone. You live with every mind as one, you feel everything. It is why we show no outward emotion. We have no need too, we can send our feelings to each other through the mental bond we share. Elves are not physically or mentally suited for solitude. An Elf alone is an Elf destined to go insane. BoomFuzzy was not connected. He couldn't feel the love I felt for him. I wanted him to feel that."

“Ya had compassion on him.”

“He was alone. I couldn't stand the thought of anyone being alone. Separated from a clan. There is no worse feeling then to not feel loved, to feel unwelcomed. Unwanted. Alone. I know.”

“Was ya outed by ya clan?”

“Yes.”

“The day they hung ya the tree?”

“Yes.”

“I is sorry.”

Quaraun’s kimono had continued to fall open, his right side now exposed, revealing scars, that had BoomFuzzy had never seen before.

“Is that the day ya got the scars?”

Quaraun snapped out of his trance, realizing his for the first time his dress had fallen open, and quickly clutched it closed.

“Ya did’ne have those before.

“BoomFuzzy and I… we weren’t together again… after that. I wasn’t fully healed yet when he died. He never saw the scars. I didn’t have them yet.”

“Why is ya scarred?”

“They stabbed me with swords. Over and over again. While I was hanging upside down in a tree.”

“I knows what they did to ya. I was there. I saw it. I stopped it. I killed ya attackers. I saved ya life. But that not what I asked. Ya is a full blooded Elf. Ya can heal yarself. Elves heal without scars. Tis horrorific scars. Why did the wounds not heal?”

Quaraun began trembling. Tears were streaming down his face.

“BoomFuzzy died.”

The Phooka sat silent for a moment, trying to understand what had happened.

“Ya poor Elf. Ya needed to go into a meditative state to heal yarself, but BoomFuzzy died right after ya was injured, ya was so upset over BoomFuzzy’s death, that ya could no meditate to heal yarself, yes?”

Quaraun nodded.

“I has seen a lot of Elves. I never saw one with scars before.”

“I left him. I was going back. But he thought I left forever. When they tortured me, they broke my bond with other Elves. I was alone inside. Every Elf on the planet knows the thoughts of every other Elf. We have no need to show outward emotions, because we are all connected and we always know what each other feels. And they cut me out of that. It's why I left BoomFuzzy and went back to the village. The broken bond from my clan was tearing me apart. I wanted the connection back with my people, but not at the cost losing BoomFuzzy. He did a few days later, while I was gone. He was the last connection I had and I lost that too.”

Unicorn watched silently as the Elf fell into a hysterical crying meltdown.

 “Some of them did accept me back again, years later, after BoomFuzzy was dead, but it wasn't the same. Most of them hated me and being connected to just one who didn't hate me, I could still feel the hate the others had through them. They hated BoomFuzzy so much that they made the day of his death a holiday.”

“Holiday?” 

“A day of feasting and celebration. They spent weeks preparing for a huge feast to celebrate the 100th year of his death, and I couldn't take their rejoicing at his suffering any more, so the night before the feast, I poisoned the food. I needed to end my connection with the clan. I could not bear to feel their hatred any more and while they lay dying, parasitized by the same poison that had taken BoomFuzzy's life, I slit their throats and cut out their hearts.”

“The same poison?”

“They hated me so much that they never saw it coming. An Elf can not sneak up on another Elf from his clan, because of the hive mind, we are all of one mind.”

“Quaraun, ya said the same poison.” 

This troubled the Phooka greatly.

“While they sent their thoughts of hate to me, they blocked any feeling of anything from me, to shield themselves from the pain they knew they were making me feel and did not want to feel themselves.”

"Quaraun? The same poison?" 

"Yes."

"Quaraun, that was a Lich making potion."

"I know."

Quaraun reached into his bag and pulled out an elaborately carved wooden chest, filled with hundreds of tiny glass vials. 

"They will never again laugh at BoomFuzzy's suffering."

"Quaraun? What did ya do?"

The pink Necromancer pulled a glass vial from the box and held it up to the light.

"I have in my command, an entire army of Liches. And I keep them prisoners, each in their own bottles, cut off and alone, with no connection to the others. Each Elf alone, just as they wanted me to be."

"Then the rumours of ya be true. Ya has gone mad."

"Yes. That is what loneliness does to an Elf. We are not solitary creatures."

“I think I should be afeared of ya.”

“The Di'Jinn said I was the most powerful creature on the planet.”

“They did.”

“More powerful then them.”

Quaraun pulled out a different bottle.

“I killed them too. The Di'Jinn are dead.”

“I know. I saw ya kill them. It were why I followed ya bak to the Moon Elf village. It were why I created BoomFuzzy.”

“I loved BoomFuzzy.”

“I know ya did.”

“And they hated him.”

"Is that what was in the bottle the pixie took?"

"Kelim? No. That bottle was special. The Elf Eater of Pepper Valley had a dragon."

"The black dragon of Fire Mountain."

"I killed her."

"Ya killed a dragon?"

"Yes. And then I brought her back."

Quaraun put the bottle away, and pulled out a small green bottle, made of heart shaped cut glass.

"She is my DracoLich. She eats my enemies."

"Ya has a DracoLich is ya pocket?"

"Yes."

“Quaraun? How is ya captured here?”

“You are a Phooka.”

“And ya be far more powerful then I is.”

“I know.”

“Ya knows?”

“Yes.”

“How be it I has captured ya?”

“I'm tired and weak. I need to rest. I can't think clearly. My mind is in a muddle.”

“Aye. Ya was looking for a place to rest.”

Both men fell silent as the Phooka pondered the danger of having so powerful a mentally deranged wizard in his lair. Quaraun seemed to know he was undefeatable and yet was too timid to fight and thus allowed himself to get captured. It bothered the Phooka too, that he was a Lich and this was a Lich Hunter and Quaraun had walked into his trap so easily. 

You can also see how VERY LITTEL narrative or description I use in my novels.

I don't like like the world building fluff that most authors use in Fantasy genres. I care about the characters, not your planet.

If I open a book and see long blocks of description or narrative text, I won't buy the book.

As a read, and a writer, I want the story to be MINIMUM 70% dialogue, and NEVER have a section of description or narrative that lasts more then 2 or 3 pages.

I'm not a fan of plot driven stories. I want character driven stories, that allow me to get to know the characters through their own actions, thoughts, and conversations.

But again, as before, all of the Grammar rules are subjective, and can be ignored if you are going for some kind of Avant Garde literary style and effect.

In any case, hopefully this all helps you out.

Good luck with it.

>>>Is it professional writing to capitalize a word to show someone yelling loudly? Or would that be italics for emphasis?

5th grade Grammar rules will help here: capitalize a word ONLY to show emphasis on, and draw attention to, important words

Here is an example of capitalization of words, used correctly:

Capitalization of a word to show a PERSON shouting was invented in 2005 by Yahoo Messenger for use in message boards, chat rooms, and forums, and was NEVER been used in published media, such as newspapers or novels.

In the trade publishing industry capital letters to show shouting is considered bad form and will land you manuscript in the trash bin, because publishing houses don't waste their time one writers who can't be bothered to learn basic grammar rules.

Prior to 2013 capital letters to show shouting was rarely seen in self published works, because prior to 2013, most self published authors strove to prove they could put out better quality, better editing work than trade published. 

Since 2013, self publishing has seen amass influx of authors who don't give a fuck about grammar rules, and say so, as often as they can, usually with some rant about how they "gotta stick it to the man" and "won't be gate keepered by the big 5". And with this trend, we also saw the rise of capital letters to show shouting in character dialogue.

So I suppose it depends on your intended target audience as well as what market you want to be see as a part of.

If you are aiming to be trade published, than disobeying ANY grammar rule is a big no-no and to be avoided at all costs.

If you are aiming to self publish, but want to compete with trade published works, than you need to use trade published methods and stick with using proper grammar rules.

If you are aiming to self-publish, but are part of the flipping the bird at the gate keepers movement, that, it doesn't matter wat you do. You don't even need to spell correctly, punctuate, or edit at all, ad knowing grammar rules i optional.

This page was written by Wendy Christine Allen of 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine.

All Rights Reserved.

Note: there are likely spelling errors on this site, and I am unlikely to see the ... I fix them when I find them, but, there are many issues here...

Note: English is not my first language, Shetlean Scottish is my native language, there are likly spelling and grammar errors, as I do not know American English and am attempting to write it by sounding words out.

Many times that Americans think a word on my site is misspelled, often it is not misspelled, it is just I mixed up languages and wrote it in Scottish without realizing I mixed the Scottish in with the English. Also our grammar is somewhat reversed from English grammar so words that are seeming in the wrong order for American English, is usually because they are in the correct order for Scottish and I either put English words in Scottish order by mistake or was unaware English put them in a different order then Scottish does.

For those unaware, Scottish Shetlean looks like this:

American English to Scottish:

a bit (piece) = a party --- EXAMPLE: "And some know a bit of Latin " > "And somme kan of latyn a party "

a long distance from = A piece fae

a piece of = the bit --- EXAMPLE: "The duck ate a piece of bread " > "The deuk ett the bit breid "

about the banks (on the shore/at the beach) = aboot da banks

accomplishments = kunnandi

After = Back o --- EXAMPLE: " After Halloween" > "Back o Hallomas "

alive (living) = kvikr

Always on the move = Never aff o da go

am I not = amn't I --- EXAMPLE: "Am I not invited? " > "I amn't invited? or Amn't I invited?"

are = is --- EXAMPLE: "Are you going soon?" > "Is ya to be going soon?"

autumn = dah haihst

belong to = fylgja

best = bettah moost

betray (verb) = svíkja

bewildered = villhyggjandi

building = biggin up --- EXAMPLE: "building confidence in everyday use " > " biggin up confidence in ivvryday øs "

built = builded --- EXAMPLE: "He built a new porch." > "Hims builded a new porch."

cast a spell = hoodooed

cat = kat (sounds like "caught") --- EXAMPLE: "Is it an orange cat?" > "Be he a o'jinn kat?"

child = bairn

church = kirk

color = colour

danger = hœttr

daren't = darena

daring = djarfr

dark = dökk

dark elf = Dökkálfr

dark-elves = Døkkálfar

darker = dökká

do you agree = ,eh? --- EXAMPLE: "That's a fine looking woman, do you agree?" > "Dair's ah right bonnie lass, eh?"

do you want to come too = ,eh? --- EXAMPLE: "I'm going to the store, do you want to come with me?" > "Me go to shope, eh?"

each = eche --- EXAMPLE: "Which each person can understand " > "That kan eche man understonde "

educated = lered --- EXAMPLE: "Both among the educated and the uneducated " > "As wel among lered as lewed "

elf = Alfr

Elf = Álfr

Elf Home = Álfheimr

Elf World = Álfheimr

elf-advice = Ælfred

elf-beautiful = ælfscyne

elf-friend = Ælfwine

elf-guardian (female) = Ælfwaru

elf-guardian (male) = Ælfweard

elf-powerful = Ælfric

everyday = ivvryday

eyelids = eye ledes --- EXAMPLE: "He closed his eyelids." > "Hims did shut hims eye ledes"

fair = faire --- EXAMPLE: "Going to the fair." > "Done gone went to the faire."

feild = felde --- EXAMPLE: "Standing in the feild." > "Stoodt in thems felde."

further = ferther --- EXAMPLE: "I looked further." > "I dids lokid ferther."

green = grene --- EXAMPLE: "Look at the green hedges and woods." > "Look see at thems heigges and holtz so grene."

handsome = braw --- EXAMPLE: "He is very handsome " > "Him wicked braw "

have faith = trúa

Have no doubts about our doing it = Nae faer o wis

Have no liking for this. = Hae nae brou o this.

have not = ain't

He knows how many beans make five. = He kens the laid frae the croun o the causey.

He knows which side his bread is buttered on. = He kens whilk side his bannock's buttert on.

Head for = Mak wye for

head rope in fishing nets and lines = baak

head to head = Be at the knag and the widdie

horse fly = klegsie

I = Me

I Think = Me thinks --- EXAMPLE: "I think we're late. " > "Me thinks that we is late. "

I wish you well for the future = Lang may yer lum reek (translation: Long may your chimney smoke)

idiot = eejit --- EXAMPLE: "You idiot." > "Ya eejit."

idiot = numpty

if = iffy or yif--- EXAMPLE: "If you don't mind..." > "Iffy yas does no care mind...."; "If you'll stay with me long enough = "Yif ye so longe with me wil dwelle". "

I'll be even with you = A'll see day aboot wi ye

know = ken

looked = lokid

looked = lokid --- EXAMPLE: "I looked up." > "I lifte up me eye ledes and lokid ferther."

magic = hoodoo

naked = nøkkviðr

needle = bodkin

neither = nouther --- EXAMPLE: "Who know neither Latin nor French " > "That kan nouther latyn ne frensch "

No = Nay --- EXAMPLE: "No, I don't think so. " > "Nay, me thinks not. "

Nobody knew = not-knew nobody

Noontide = Da heicht o da day

NOTE: Extra words are often added. --- EXAMPLE: "Did you meet the new family next door?" > "Dids ya gets a chance to stop by and meets with thems new folk that move-ed in down yawn there next doors to ya, eh?"

NOTE: Extra words are often added. --- EXAMPLE: "He went to Rite-Aid to pick up his prescription" > "Hims did go to that yawn there new fangled store the new folks call that Rite Aid place, to gets himself some of thems there pills what the doctor gone and tells him to take each morning, a-yep, hims did."

old = olde --- EXAMPLE: "But educated and uneducated, old and young " > "Bot lered and lewed olde and yonge "

orange = o'jinn

out = oot --- EXAMPLE: "The cat wants to go out." > "The kat he do wants oot."

outside = oot dair

people = fokk --- EXAMPLE: "the people of Shetland " > "Shetland fokk "

people = folke --- EXAMPLE: "Look at all those people." > "Lookie at all thems folke."

poorly = febelly --- EXAMPLE: "Who know French very poorly " > "That kan frensch ful febelly "

Recognising = Recognisin --- EXAMPLE: "Recognising the bilingual nature of Shaetlan speakers " > "Recognisin da wye at Shaetlan spaekers is bilingual "

shield = skjoldr

Since = For --- EXAMPLE: "Since that is your native language " > "For that is youre kynde langage "

tell = telle --- EXAMPLE: "I'll tell you in English " > "In englysch tonge I schal you telle "

the = da, de, or is not used at all --- EXAMPLE: "I went to the store" > "Me goes to da shoppe" or "Me goes to da shoppe" or "Me goes to shoppe"

them = dem, dem dair --- EXAMPLE: "I went with them" > "Me goes wit dem dair"

there = dair --- EXAMPLE: "I want those potatoes" > "Me be wanting dem dair tatetas."

they = dey

To where = whither --- EXAMPLE: ""Where you go, I will go." " > ""Whither thou goest, I'll go."

understand = understonde

understand = understonden --- EXAMPLE: "Some understand English " > "And somme understonden englysch "

very = wicked --- EXAMPLE: "very good" > "wicked good"; "very bad" > "wicked bad"; "very cold" > "wicked cold"

Where = Whither --- EXAMPLE: "Where is the restroom? " > "Whither is the privy?"

Yes = Yea or Aye --- EXAMPLE: "Yes, I think so. " > "Yea, me thinks so. " or "Aye, me thinks so. "

For anyone actually interested in learning my native language, the Scottish government has THIS listed as the official dictionary of our people:  https://static1.squarespace.com/static/61d7352954b7fd1c9dbdfef4/t/65ddb2749d5e0541a01009c0/1709027964496/Spaektionary_2024feb.pdf  

The Scottish government provides this document to show our language in use: https://www.shetland.uhi.ac.uk/t4-media/one-web/uhi-shetland-images-and-documents/documents-/shaetlan/Shaetlan-Language-Plan-2022-Shaetlan.pdf 

More information about our language can be found on this website:  https://www.iheardee.com  which is written in my native language.

However, there is also other reasons why words might be misspelled, or why I might not understand someone when they speak to me.

My grandmother Helen Ricker Allen, was from Unst, Shetland, Scotland, and she the one who raised me. She taught me to read and write, but it was Shetlain that she taught me. She died when I was 8 years old, and I was locked in a woodshed after her furneral, I escaped the woodshed 27 years later at age 31, and have been trying to learn how to speak and write English since then.

It is a very great struggle.

At age 37 I took remidial reading and speaking classes at Southern Maine Community College, but we are Gypsies and Gypsy men do not allow us Gypsy women to have education, and so, while at college, on November 14, 2013, I was beaten with a golf club, while I was 8 months pregnet, breaking my spine, hips, and knees, killing my baby and leaving me quardepaleic since.

Now my primary focus these past 13 years has been on relearning to use my hand so I could type... as of 2023, I have regained the use of my right thumb, and first two right fingers, and after 10 years offline, I am back online due to I can use three finguers.

I never went to school, so I do not know maths and numbers and sciences, and I do not know what else would have been taught to me in school. We are Scottish Gypsies and Gypsy culture does not allow females to go to school. Being born female was already a great sin, but my grandmother took great risk in teaching me reading and writing. At 4 years old I was punished by my Uncle Bruce for knowing how to read, by being beaten in the face with a cinder block brick, that broke my right jaw and left me with garbaled near-mute spoken words ever since.

Because no one ever spoke words to be face to face from he time I was 8 years old until I was 37 years old (I escaped the room at age 27, but did not start college until 37), I have no training in how to vocally sound out or speak the words I write or read. I can read words, but I do not know how to sound out or say those words. I can write words, but I do not know how to match the written word against the spoken word. I struggle to associate spoken words at all, or make them match up with writen words.

Esentially, written words and spoken words are two completly seperate languages in my brain, and I have difficulty understanding spoken words.

If you say a sentance to me with your mouth, chances are very high I will have ZERO understanding of what you said and I will not be able to ander you.

However, if you WRITE down that exact same sentabnce, I can understand you and can type a written responce to you.

My doctors tell me this is a side effect of extreme isolation and neglect and lack of human contact during my toddler, childhood, teen, and young adult years, and that my brain never deveoloped to comprehend spoken vocal words due to no one ever speaking to me in over three decades of the first half of my life.

While I can read and write, American English (somewhat) I do no know how words are sounded out, what they are supposed to sound like. I readand write by shape recognition, not by sound/vocal recognition, so when reading and writing I do no "hear the words in my head" as I am told most people do when they read and write. In other words... I see "c a t" and think "c-a-t" I do not think "cat" nor do I "see" an image of a cat, no do I "hear" the word cat spoken. I'm told that this is very rare and that most people read and write by sounding out the words and linking them to visual mind images, while hearing the sound of the word in their head. I neiher hear words in my head no see images of things in my head. I'm told this is what makes me both a speed reader and speed writer, because I'm not tripped up by hear sounds or seeing images in my head like nomal people would be doing... however, I'm also told this is why my spelling and grammar are very poor, because my brain is not hear the sounds of the words or seeing visual images of the objects the words represent, so my mind also does not register spelling and grammer errors at all.

As I was only let out of the woodshed on Sundays to go to the Cape Elezabeth Ward Church of the August Stake of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, I was never allowed to go to school or hospital either. No adults ever talked to me because I was evil for comitted the sin of being born female, so I never learned how to speak properly and do not know how to sound out words to say them.

I was 42 years old, in 2016 when, while having an MRI for my spine, the doctors found out my speak issue was caused by a broken jaw as a toddler that was healed wrong because not being allowed to go to doctors. I had surgury to fix that, and since 2016 have been trying to learn how to use my jaw and touge so I can speak vocal words now.

Since 2023 my primary focus shifted to relearning to walk. I can now, in 2026, sit up for 2 or 3 hours a day, and can sand with a cane for a few minutes, and can walk for around five thousand feet in 2 to 3 segments a day, with the help of pushing my wheelchair like a walker.

As of 2026, with a slight return to using my fingers and legs, I am once again focused on trying to learn the American English, but I live in mortal fear of my uncles and male cousins, as they are so hateful of allowing me to have education.

have no one to help me to know if I am doing words correctly, and as such, I have no way of knowing if there are spelling and grammar errors, but I asume there are, and I fix them when I learn them, but I do not know what I do not know and spelling American words is a thing I do bnot know.

I have Low Fucntioning Kanner's Syndrom, also known as "RainMan Type of Autism" aka REAL and ACTUAL Autism, not to be confused with Aspergers, High Functioning Autism, or and of thr 861 illnesses on the Autism Spectrum. An Autism Spectrum Disorder is an illness that has symptoms similar to Autism but IS NOT Autism. If you have an Autism Spectrum Disorder, it LITERALLY MEANS you do NOT have Autism.

I am medically diagnosed as "kanner's syndrome, actual autism, the rainman type, profoundly retarded autistic savant, with a general IQ of 73, and an writing IQ of 221" but they added that they did not know how to properly diagnose me as I am "technically a feral child" and they don't know "how much is the autism, and how much is simple horrific levels of abuse and neglect induced post traumatic stress disorder that will go away with proper socilization".

It means I know how to write, I can write a lot, and it is next to impossible for you to teach me how to do literally anythig else because my brain only knows how to write and doesn;t know how to do anything else..
There's a reason, when I do book signings, people are quick to say: "Okay, what's the joke? why is this stupid retard here? where's the real author? I know this retard isn't the author. where are you hiding the author, why is this fucking retard here"

The end result is, I have near zero social interaction... my 3 years in college was the ONLY face to face interaction I have ever had with humans in my entire life, and I struggle deeply to understand MOST words used by MOST people when they ask me question. And so I suffer from a huge lack of understanding many words people say to me, how to translate those words into spelling, and how to translate what it is that has been said.

The fact remains hat until there exists a human on this planet who is willing to sit down and teach me what words spoken line up with and match what words written, this deficent is unlily to improve. But the fact also remains, that I am simply far too profoundly retarded for anyone to even try to make any attempt at all even to speak a friendly "hgelloe" or "good morning" when passing me on the street, so I have lost all hope of anyone ever either being my friend, being willing to teach me how to match spoken words to written words, or how to speak to other humans.

While there are around 20k pages on this website, most of them are blocked from search engines, with only around 800 of them available for appearing in Google/Bing/etc search results. The remainder can only be accessed via the various links found throughout this site. This was done deliberately on my part, and I did it because the bulk of the pages on this website are chapters from 138 novels and 423 novellas, so only the first page of each novel and novella indexed by search engines, and the remainder are linked in order, one page at a time, via clicking "next page" at the end of each. So if you are looking for a specific page from a specific novel, Google can't help you.

Thank you for stopping by and have a nice day! ꧁✨🌸🔮🦄🔮🌸✨꧂ And if it’s your birthday today: ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐꧁ᴴᵃᵖᵖʸ☆ᵇⁱʳᵗʰᵈᵃʸ꧂🤍🎀🧸🌷🍭 Wendy Christine Allen 🌸💖🦄 aka EelKat 🧿💛🔮👻

Wheelchair Fundraiser

@eelkat i just found out there is yet another bizarre rumour going around. where are these wild rumours coming from? who is starting them? and why? ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

@eelkat since I've been flooded with hundreds of messages the past two weeks asking if I still own "the world's most haunted car", yes, and here it is, filmed today May 18, 2026… but my son Xavier is dead, i am crippled and given that people are AGAIN showing up calling my Dodge "haunted", calling my friend "an alien", calling me "transgender", and spreading wild defamation slander connecting me to Stephen King, I think I need to start taking down the contact information of every blogger, podcaster, youtuber, and social media account spreading these rumors, and sue every single one of them for CAUSING my car to be cut in half May 10, 2010, for CAUSING the backhoe that drove over my house August 8, 2013, for CAUSING my son's murder November 14, 2013, for CAUSING me to be crippled and in a wheelchair November 14, 2013, and for CONTINUING to CAUSE harassers to show up in person to harass me near daily, STILL now in 2026. EVERYONE telling you my car is haunted, telling you my friend is an alien, calling my car "the goldeneagle", calling my friend "Etiole", or trying to connect me or my car to Stephen King, is lying to you. They crippled me when I was 8 months pregnant, and a woman with a golf club, severed my spine and bashed my baby's head in, I spent 9 years relearning to walk, and the FBI is 13 years into the murder investigation and not yet identified the attacker who crippled me and killed my baby, both violently with a golf club and the FBI believes that it is friends and family of the woman who did it, are the ones who started and spread the rumors saying my car is haunted, saying I'm an alien abductee, saying all kinds of similar bs about aliens, ufos, ghosts, witchcraft, demons, and Stephen King connections, even though I don't believe in ghosts, aliens, ufos, demons, and had never heard of Stephen King before 30k of his fans showed up in my yard trying to find my car! FBI believes the backhoe driver and the murderer are the same person and it is a developer who wanted my land and so started the Stephen King, ghost, and alien rumors all in an attempt to drive me off my land, and when it didn't work they drove a backhoe over my house, and when that didn't work they crippled me and killed my son. Why are they doing this? How do I get them to stop? ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

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Do you know who drove this backhoe over my house at 146 Portland Avenue, Old Orchard Beach, Maine on August 8, 2013? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

My house at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, July 4, 2013, photo taken because we had just finished building a baby room on the back. vs My house August 8, 2013, when the same group of people (yes group, the golf club woman was not alone when she attacked November 14, 2013, nor was she alone with her second attack July 2016.) who murdered my son on November 14, 2013 at Southern Maine Community College and crippled me July 26, 2016 at scarborough WalMart,... they arrived the first time with a backhoe on August 8, 2013, that they used to drive over my house, during a time of day that I normally was home asleep... I had to work a different shift at the Waffle Cone Pizza Food Truck at George's Parking Lot by Bill's Pizza at the OBB Peir, that day, otherwise, I too would be at the bottom of a landfill, along with my house and everything I owned that was also in the house. I was 5 months pregnant at the time and have been homeless for just under 14 years, homeless ever since....

... which means it is now only a few weeks from the 14th anniversary of my son's murder. I was 8 month pregnant November 14, 2013, and a student ay SMCC, and coming out of the Buglight Lighthouse art studio after art class, when a still unidentifiedwoman wielding a golf club attacked me, severed my spine, while I was 8 months pregnant, triggered early labour, then killed my son minutes after he was born.

While accusing me of being transgender, screaming "transvestite freak" and "look at that thing, that's Ken's son in a dress"... while I was 8 months pregnant.

My house at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, July 4, 2013, photo taken because we had just finished building a baby room on the back. vs My house August 8, 2013, when the same group of people (yes group, the golf club woman was not alone when she attacked November 14, 2013, nor was she alone with her second attack July 2016.) who murdered my son and crippled me, arrived the first time with a backhoe that they used to drive over my house, during a time of day that I normally was home asleep... I had to work a different shift at the Waffle Cone Pizza Food Truck at George's Parking Lot by Bill's Pizza at the OBB Peir, that day, otherwise, I too would be at the bottom of a landfill, along with my house and everything I owned that was also in the house. I was 5 months pregnant at the time and have been homeless for just under 14 years, homeless ever since.

The backhoe driver returned November 14, 2013, armed with a golf club, used it to break my spine and smash my baby's brains out on the ground

On November 14, 2013, my son was murdered. I was 8 months pregnant, leaving my college classroom, and just getting into my car, when 3 strangers, a man and two women, armed with golf clubs leapt out from behind my car screaming "kill or be killed, kill the transvestite freaks, kill them all before they kill us! look at that thing! That is Ken's son, look at how it's dressed! kill the transvestite freaks! kill or be killed"... while the bald man and the red haired woman chanted this over and over, the blonde woman, lunged with the golf club.

She severed my spine, I am now a quadriplegic, and been paralyzed arms and legs, and in a wheelchair for 13 years now. She broke my hips, my knees, my legs, ruptured most of my discs, and shattered three of my vertebrae so bad that the shards of bone acted like glass and embedded themselves into my spinal column nerve bundle.

The attack also triggered labour.

My son was born in that parking lot, and he lived only a couple of minutes, before the deranged blonde woman, beat his head in and smashed his brains out, with the same golfclub she had just used to sever my spine and leave me crippled for the rest of my life.

Realizing that I was not transgender, and they'd just murdered a baby, the man grabbed the 2 women and forcibly dragged them away to a 4 door white pickup truck, and they left me there to die.

The FBI told me later, that a few weeks before this attack, and transwoman, had murdered a cis woman, in a parking lot, abou 20 miles away from where I was attacked. The FBI, believes that my attackers, had somehow found out I wrote transgender fiction, connecting my real name to my penname, (my father's name is in fact "Ken", and I do have a brother) and believed that I wrote transgender fiction, because I was myself transgender, even though I'm not transgender. The FBI, believes the attackers, thought I was my brother, pretending to be a woman.

The FBI investigation, into my son's murder, has dragged on for 13 years, and still now in 2026, continues on, with the FBI, still not having yet identified my attackers, and only guessing at what their motive was.

Thus we come to 2014, and the full swing change of the series I write. WHY my series, went from just a transman main character living life, to the full blown Mpreg genre series that it now is today.

Before the attack, I had a chance of having a baby. I don't know. And because I'm in America, I'm too old to adopt. You have to be under 45 years old to adopt a baby. That is the law in America. I was informed this, when we tried to adopt, now that my injuries leave me unable to get pregnant a 9th time.

Thus began my obsessively writing, my transman main character, pregnant. Always pregnant now. Every time. Every story. Stories that now fully focus on pregnancy, labour, miscarriages, babies dying, babies living, raising babies... the whole series, since 2014 has devolved into an outright baby obsession.

Meanwhile, reborn baby dolls were suggested to me by my therapist, and have also become a deeply obsessive part of my life. Because 13 years ago my son was murdered minutes after he was born, because a transphobic bigot mistook me for being transgender, I'm STILL in a wheelchair, struggling to relearn to use my arms and legs, now 13 years later, and I'm still DAILY dealing with police officers and FBI agents who while they are trying to find my son's killer, they are also daily reminding me... oh, yeah, my son was murdered, literally ripped out of my belly, by a transphobe. Who still has not been located and walks free to kill again.

The golfclub woman as she looked during the golf club attack at Southern Maine community college November 14, 2013. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026. If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

The golfclub woman as she looked during the shopping cart attack at Scarborough WalMart July 26, 2016. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026. If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

The 2nd woman as she looked at both attacks, her hair goes all the way down to her knees. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026. If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer's accomplice, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

Do you know who these two woman who crippled me and murdered my baby, at Southern Maine Community College at 10PM on November 14, 2013, are, and what their connection to the backhoe that drove over my house is? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

I am a legally blind quadriplegic, and low verbal, I have also published 138 novels in the last 48 years. It's not as impossible as people think. The problem being blind and quadriplegic, medically have different meanings then how those two words are used medically.

Fewer than 3% of all blind people see nothing. While 97% people who are classified as fully blind are able to see up to two feet in front of them. Legally blind means I can see more then two feet in front of me but not far enough to see twenty feet in front of me. In my case I can see about eight feet.

Quadriplegic, has varying levels, it means having a damaged nerve bundle in the spinal column causing limited mobility of all 4 limbs, (in my case this was done by a women wielding a golf club, who also beat my 8 month infant's head to pulp on the parking lot tarmak, at the same time she severed my spine with the same golf club; both on November 14, 2013; the FBI investigation into my son's murder and my being crippled has gone on now for 13 years, a few weeks away from 14 years now, and the FBI has still not identified the killer or her motive). Contrary to popular misconception, quadriplegic does NOT mean ZERO movement, it means means limited movement, specifically in means unable to lift arms over head, unable to grip fingers around objects to pick them up, and unable to stand for more then 5 minutes to a time. Because there are so many thousands of nerves in each limb it is actually very rare for there to be 100% no movement, but how much, and to what extent varies by patent depending upon the specific point of injury to the spinal column.

Meaning typing is still possible for over 60% of all quadriplegics.

In my case, it was the lower spine that was severed, cutting off completly my ability to move my right leg, leaving limited feeling in my left leg, and an ability to stand but not walk, with crutches, for the first 9 years. I regained enough nerve growth in my legs by the 9th year to be able to take ten or twelve steps allowing me to get out of bed for the first time since the golf club attack; This in turn lead to me being able to start using a wheelchair, as I was able to sit upright for the first time as well.

Because the shattered vertebrae bone fragments are broken off completly and embedded into the nerve bundle just above my tailbone, doctors were saying I would never walk again, but now at 13 years, I am able to push mu wheelchair like a walker, a distance of almost a thousand steps a day. Though doctors are still doubtful I will ever walk "normally" again, I have proven them wrong, when their said 13 years ago, that I would never walk again at all.

But because of the placement of the damage to my spine, regaining hand use, was always thought possible, it was just a matter of waiting long enough for nerve regrowth, along side daily finger exercises. I was able to continue writing, after becoming quadriplegic, because I still have use of my right thumb, and 2 fore figures of my right hand. And can type 90 words per minute with those 3 fingers.

I however have no wrist strength, elbow strength, or shoulder strength, so I am not able to form a fist, or lift objects, or brush my hair, or my teeth, all thing I have to have my caretaker do. But, those things are not needed for typing. Unfortunately, my pinky and ring fingers are "nerve dead" and drag over the keyboard, and cause horrific spelling errors and typos, which are incredibly frustrating to deal with.

Unfortunately trying to edit errors myself, just makes the errors worse, because those same two fingers drag over the keyboard yet again. Prior to the golf club attack, I rarely had spelling errors; now I got more spelling errors then someone is learning English as second language. Editing is a challenge, that I've had to accept, I simply can not do myself, and I have to hire several editors to help with that.

Low verbal means sounds can still be made, sounds that software programs like Dragon can be trained to recognize and translate, and type into full words. More then half my novels were typed with this method.

I still have a long ways to go before I am anything close to being able to do the things I could do before the golf club woman beat my baby's brains out and shattered my spine. And you know what's more frustrating then how slow mu medical progression has been? The fact that it's been 13 years and the police and FBI are still coming up at dead ends as to who the woman who murdered my baby was, or why she even did it.

My son's 14th birthday is only a few weeks away, but he didn't even get to live long enough to celebrate his 1st birthday, I don't even know why. And I can't wait to regain my ability to walk again, because regaining my ability to walk, means gaining the ability to go outside and start looking for my son's murderer myself instead of sitting at home trapped in a wheelchair waiting for the police and FBI to to find her. So, writing isn't a big priority for me anymore. I only write now, as a way to exercise my hands, in between relearning to walk.

Never let a disability stop you. Plenty of writers, artists, athletes, do not let either blindness, speech impediments, or limited mobility hold then back from perusing their careers.

Do you know who these two woman who crippled me and murdered my baby, at Southern Maine Community College at 10PM on November 14, 2013, are, and what their connection to the backhoe that drove over my house is? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

More information about the backhoe attack, my son's murder, my becoming crippled, my becoming homeless, and the FBI investigation around all of it, can be found here.

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All the writing prompts found here on my website, are also available in printed paperback editions, on Amazon.

There are no ebook editions as they are already available digitally here on my website.

The Park Bench Method of Writing 100+ Cozy Fantasy Writing Prompts for NaNoWriMo & NovNov 2025 Finding Your Character’s Goal Through Mundane Moments (Character Creation & Development - NaNoWriMo & NovNov 2025) --with 500+ Writing Prompts! 30 Cozy Fantasy Writing Prompts - June 2025 - 30 Day Edition 30 Cozy Fantasy Writing Prompts, Queer Throuples/Polycules Slice of Life Edition 30 "TRUE COZY" Cozy Fantasy Writing Prompts 🫖 30 More Cozy Fantasy Writing Prompts - June 2025 Writing Character Driven Flash Fiction for NaNoWriMo & NovNov 2025 -with 90 Cozy Fantasy Slice of Life Writing Prompts A shit ton load of daily writing prompts and writing dares to use for National Novel Writing Month, 2025 edition! For the people who had been asking where to find them, the Print Paperback editions of the writing prompts found on my website are available HERE. What's New (Newly Published or Recently Updated or Edited) NaNoWriMo (Now NovNov) Annual October Prep - 2026 Edition (22 years!) Oct 23, 26 03:51 PM NaNoWriMo (Now NovNov) Annual October Prep - 2026 Edition (22 years!) Read More Currency in a zombie apocalypse or The economy of Vesonta Oct 23, 26 12:03 PM Currency in a zombie apocalypse or How does the economy of Vesonta work? or Do the UnSeelie Court use money? Read More What makes a wizard a wizard? Oct 22, 26 04:42 PM What makes a wizard a wizard? Character Creation and Worldbuilding lore Read More Vampires - a look at Vampirism in The Adventures of Quaraun the Insane Oct 21, 26 11:50 AM Vampires - a look at Vampirism in The Adventures of Quaraun the Insane/The Pink Necromancer series Read More Is Quaraun gay? | Quaraun FAQs Oct 14, 26 02:59 PM Is Quaraun gay? Is The Pink Necromancer transgender? | Answering readers FAQs about Quaraun the Insane Read More Wendy C Allen: Old Orchard Beach & Biddeford Maine Dark Fantasy Author Oct 10, 26 05:58 AM Official Home Page Of Wendy C Allen: Old Orchard Beach & Biddeford, Maine's Autistic Artist, Doll Designer, Art Car Builder, and Dark Fantasy MPreg Author Read More How Did The FBI Get Involved? Oct 05, 26 10:46 PM How Did The FBI Get Involved? Read More But is it Omega Verse? Sep 30, 26 11:11 PM Readers have suggested my Quaraun series is Omegaverse... let's find out if it is or not Read More Who is Tod Murphy? (updated for Christmas Eve attack 2025) Sep 27, 26 10:49 PM Who is Tod Murphy? (updated for Christmas Eve attack 2025) Read More Phookas Sep 25, 26 02:46 PM Everything you could ever want to know about phookas Read More ChatGPT Command Prompts For Fantasy Writers Sep 16, 26 04:27 PM Asking ChatGPT To Create Its Own Command Prompts For Fantasy Writers Read More The Egg Question: A Pink Necromancer Short Story Aug 06, 26 08:42 PM After a long day of killing Humans, The UnSeelie Court's pregnant mage contemplates why having sex with the Dragon King does not result in laying Dragon Eggs. Read More Fish, Eels, Storyland, Autism, Becoming a Published Author, Art Cars Jul 30, 26 09:16 AM Fish, Eels, Storyland, Autism, Becoming a Published Author, and Art Cars; a long and varied conversation with ChatGPT5.6 Read More The Cat at the Sea Cave Jul 29, 26 10:02 AM A Pink Necromancer story poem Read More My Elves Are JellyFish Jul 13, 26 01:38 PM My Elves Are JellyFish, and I asked for thoughts from Google vs ChatGPT Read More The Three-Seventeen Pee Expedition Jun 16, 26 02:33 PM The Three-Seventeen Pee Expedition: A Pink Necromancer Short Story Read More Why I Write (Some Thoughts on Living With Autism) Jun 10, 26 10:45 AM Why I Write (Some Thoughts on Living With Autism) and a look at the history of 144 and 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine Read More How Much Money Do Self-Published Authors Make Jun 08, 26 08:26 PM A Look at How Much Money A Million Books Sold Is Equal To - How Much Money Do Self-Published Authors Make Read More 146 Portland Ave Old Orchard Beach, Maine, FBI Murder Investigation Jun 08, 26 08:20 PM 146 Portland Ave Old Orchard Beach, Maine, FBI Murder Investigation; How Did The FBI Get Involved? Read More The Quaraun Series Prologue May 20, 26 03:11 PM The Quaraun Series Prologue Read More An Introduction to The Pink Necromancer Series May 17, 26 04:47 PM An Introduction to The Pink Necromancer Series: The Adventures of Quaraun the Insane Read More No, Disabled People Do Not Exist To Inspire You May 14, 26 11:01 PM Yes, it is offensive to write disabled characters to act as inspiration to others. or how to write disabled characters accurately Read More Murder Investigation Updates, Old Orchard Beach, Maine May 11, 26 12:25 PM Murder Investigation Updates, Old Orchard Beach, Maine Read More The FBI murder investigation 144 & 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach May 06, 26 07:05 PM The FBI murder investigation of 144 & 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine - Everything we are allowed to publically release Read More Thoughts on Reborn Therapy Dolls After My Son's Murder Apr 15, 26 06:29 AM My 8 month old son was murdered; Thoughts on Reborn Therapy Dolls After My Son's Murder Read More Addressing victim blaming in murder investigations Mar 13, 26 09:40 PM Addressing victim blaming in murder investigations Read More The Tussah Day Serenade Feb 16, 26 07:44 AM The Tussah Day Serenade, a fiction short story poem - LGBTQAI+ FICTION | The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane | TransMan MC | Read More Ghosts Beneath the Pink Silk Tent Feb 11, 26 05:11 AM Ghosts Beneath the Pink Silk Tent Read More An Existential Crisis Feb 11, 26 05:09 AM An Existential Crisis 🌸{A Pink Necromancer Triple Drabble} 🦄🌸 Read More The Moon Goddess Laughs From The Rooftops Feb 11, 26 05:05 AM The Moon Goddess Laughs From The Rooftops Read More 10 Years of Injustice: Tackling Radical Church Extremism Feb 11, 26 04:29 AM 10 Years of Injustice: Tackling Radical Church Extremism Read More Don't Be A Stalker Feb 10, 26 09:14 PM Don't be a stalker Read More IMPORTANT NOTE: All the writing prompts found here on my website, are also available in printed paperback editions, on Amazon. There are no ebook editions as they are already available digitally here on my website. January February 2026 Updates If you are one of (as of December 2025, the now more than ten thousand) daily visitors, who arrive here daily in search of SEO advice, I made this page for you: My response to the alarming spike in traffic to my "SEO" pages. aka I am getting Weird Spike In Google Traffic For SEO & Content Writing & Marketing keywords and search terms even though this is a Yaoi and Gay Romance website that has absolutely nothing to do with SEO or Content Writing or Content Marketing What the fuck? The Park Bench Method of Writing Receiving death threats over a septic tank and a little brown log cabin, but I own neither a septic tank nor a little brown log cabin... what even are these thugs talking about? I am a mute/none verbal wheelchair user and I just had an encounter over my wheelchair, but being mute had no way to defend myself. Crazy Woman Just Attacked - No Clue Why or Who She Is (August 14, 2025) Articles For Writers on How To Write & Publish A Rapid Release  Series Want to write like I do? You want this page: Writing Mindset Shift & Lester Dent vs Kishotenketsu w/Thoughts on Being one of Dr. Lindstrom's 200 PenPal Students (NaNoWriMo & NovNov 2025) plus Polyamory Beyond Fetish: Writing Multi-Partner Relationships and Writing Blind Characters Plus Elves and Very High, High Elves  VS Unicorns and Phookas and Demons and also What exactly makes an Elf an Elf? (What is the definition of an Elf?) but Noses, Penis Piercings, And Rapunzel Hair and Need Help Defeating Overpowered Fantasy Wizards? + Wizards and More Wizards and Even More Wizards and Still More wizards and MAKE VILLAINS EVIL AGAIN: A WRITER’S BATTLE CRY TO RECLAIM THE DARK SIDE Have you ever considered: How Things In Your Life Affect Your Writing or Currency In Worldbuilding and The Dangers of World Travel or  Dragging a Body Through The Snow and Talking While Falling Asleep or Worldbuilding MoonQuakes and Disabled Characters for Fantasy Writers or I have everything but the kitchen sink... wait, how'd that kitchen sink get in my pocket? Writing Absurdist Fantasy Books but How long does it take to reach 1667 words? and 50k in one day - is it possible? plus What is the average typing speed? plus What (self-publishing) platform pays the most (for books)? My top 3 picks. Comparing my results from different places. and Knowing what to include when describing the surroundings of a scene also Validation Is a Cult and Open Strong, Stay Loud and  Where are the writers who love writing? plus Self-Publishing Success: Does Anyone Ever Succeed at Self-Publishing? and Where To Get Writing Ideas? and Writing What You Know Might Not Be What You Think It Is and Why I do not attend writing groups...are they all like this or just the ones in Maine? but also Don't Forget To Just Write  because Yes, You Can! Plus The Park Bench Method of Writing (with 10k writing prompt list) or The Park Bench Method of Writing (just the article) plus: How did you build your audience? Not online, that's for sure. aka How to sell ten million books aka How I sold ten million books. Need Writing Prompts? For Anyone Looking for: The "haunted car" people call The GoldenEagle & my response to Stephen King's illegally filming my family and farm in his movies? My response to MUFON's Amphibious Aliens? My response to Coast to Coast AMs Arrival in my yard? Back to the Home Page Wendy Christine Allen, Old Orchard Beach's Autistic Author, Artist, Illustrator, & Art Car Designer Counting Down to the 2028 50th Anniversary of my first published book (September 23, 1978) Yes, I am aware there are a lot of spelling errors on this site. No, I likely will not be fixing most of them. I have been quadriplegia/paralyzed arms and legs since November 14, 2013; As of 2026, I have regained use of two fully functional fingers on my right hand, and only stiff limited movement of all remained eight fingers. This causes most of the typos and spelling errors as my near-dead pinky and ring fingers tend to drag over the other letters on the keyboard. Attempts to correct errors, often causes more errors for the same reason. Much of my writing is also speech to text, but I have "profound low functioning, non-verbal kanner's syndrome aka autism aka the rainman type" (that is what the medical diagnosis called it), I have the medically diagnosed retarded type of autism, that medical doctors mean when they say "real and actual autism", I do not have the cool trend self diagnoses tiktok type of "autism". What this means is, in spite of five decades of trying, I have very limited vocal speaking abilities and a lower then average vocabulary, that leaves my speaking ability around the level of a 4 or 5 year old child; I do not know math or money or clocks and. I also, was raised by a Shetland Scottish Grandmother (Helen Ricker Allen) until her death when I was 8 years old, and she did not speak American, she spoke Shetland/Scottish, Shetlandic, which is a Nordic language, different from Scotts Language, not related to Gaelic which is what many Scottish speak, and while classified as a type of Scottish English is is considered "Olde medieval Norse" dialect of Scottish English and spoken by fewer then two thousand people as of 2026. It is the language of Scottish Travelling Gypsies, which is what we racial are. I was 31 years old first time I ever heard American English, and only started to learn American English at 42 years old. Right now in 2026 at 51 years old, I am able to speak American English on around the level of an 8 year old child, and greatly do not understand over 90% of American words, American slang, and American media references. What this means is, OFTEN words you think are spellt wrong (like color vs colour, or traveling vs travelling, are in fact NOT spelt wrong, because I use Scottish spellings) and often when I hear an American word, I spell it phonetically because I do not know the correct American spelling. Likewise we Scottish do not have words like my or your, and so say me and you, in places where Americans would say my and your.  I also use Scottish word meanings, not American word meanings, for example Unicorn means a blood thirsty flesheating shapeshifting sea creature that comes on land and pretends to be a wounded horse to lure in humans to eat, it can only be captured by a virgin. But when I say Unicorn, a word I frequently use, because I write Unicorn folkloric short stories... I find that most Americans connect Unicorns to children's cartoons, gay pride, or swinging sex lives... I struggle to understand who in their right mind thought the most bloodthirsty monster of Scotland folklore was good fodder for children's cartoons or "sex positive" mascots, me thinks Americans need to brush up on the lore of Unicorns using their horns as sword to stabbed people's eyes out, while gallopping through swamps with rows of bloody Human heads hanging from their backs via braids made of Human entrails... really, why did Americans thinks a monster like a Unicorn was fit for children's cartoons or sex positivity? Americans is weird. All this to say... speech to text software, struggles badly with my thick Shetland accent, my slurred Autism speech impediment, and causes additional misspellings and typos because it can not figure out what words I am trying to say. And while I could take the time time to run all of it through a spell checker, that does require better hand mobility then I have, to copy the text from one program to the next and manually click each word, with finger mobility that I simply do not have, but also, most of my time is spent in trying to relearn to walk, and if you are local, you've probably seen this as I'm a stubborn bitch who refused to accept the doctor disnosis that I will never walk again, so, I walk around the block every day pushing my wheelchair, refusing to sit in my wheelchair, and... ...it's taking me 13 years to do it, but, I'm not actually able to stand up and make it all the way around the block now, and my focus on trying to relearn to walk is far more important to me, then catering to your pampered arse by fixing spelling errors, when there are far bigger problems to worry about in life, the spelling errors made by a quadriplegic who is typing this with her only two functioning fingers. Also, in recent years, I've watched the internet devolve into a mindless clusterfuck of ChatGPT written everything. Everyone sounds the same online these days, because no writes their own work anymore. Every website out there has become a carbon copy of each other, because they are all be written by ChatGPT now. I think ChatGPT makes a funny thing to chat with in your spare time, so you can laugh at the hilarity of how inaccurate it's responses are... but I am horrified that people are using AI for serious writing, writing they publish and try to pass off as their own. We live in a society where people people are forgetting how write. Heck I can read and write cursive, calligraphy, italic, short hand, and editor's marks, also edit my books by hand diagraming every sentence, and that... start walking around your neighbourhood and ask anyone under 30 if they sentence diagraming IS, let alone how to do it. So yes, I CAN spell check, and no I don't, for anything but my novels and short story collections, I spell check when it matters... and this is a website, not a printed book... but also, I am just getting so damn fucking fed up with endless AI writing online, so, no, I'm not going to fix errors and typos on my website, and you can bitch about that all you want (yes, I do get your messages, I just don't answer anyone in private) but, honey, maybe instead of bitching over my spelling errors, be thankful is still at least one website on the internet that still being written by a Human now in 2026 when ChatGPT writes over 70% of all posts online.

Looking for my annual NaNoWriMo Prompts and Dares? I've been publishing these every year since 2004! Here's,for my 26th year, a shit ton load of daily writing prompts and writing dares to use for National Novel Writing Month, 2025 edition! The Park Bench Method of Writing The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane: Paperpacks & Hardcover Editions on Amazon: Not sure what the series is about?  Check out  The Quaraun Series Prologue and Faeries vs Elves (In The Quaraun Series) A Pink Necromancer World Lore Post and Worldbuilding MoonQuakes and Disabled Characters for Fantasy Writers and How well do I know Quaraun? - Let's find out! to find out more about the plot and lore of the series. Not sure which story to start with? These here are good places to start, to get a good introduction to the three main characters: Absinthe Slushies: An Ode to Frozen Green Fairy Wine Bone Dice BoomFuzzy's Chowder Dilemma The Cellar's Forgotten Treasure Chaos in The Lighthouse - Shattered Panes, Shattered Minds The Cliff-Side Temple Control or Protection? A Dark and Stormy Night Drying Herbs Excited For The New Baby Five Ways To Save Money in Las Vegas The Golden Dragon Keys Herons in the Dunes If your ass ain’t freezing or your brains ain’t scrambled, you’re ain’t really trying Kiss Me Fuckin' Arse - Just Another Day in the Ice-Laced Ruins of The GodForsaken City Lens and Light Maintenance Macaroni and Cheese: A Creamy Pasta Dish Drenched in Melted Cheese, Often Topped with Breadcrumbs- It's Never That Easy A Map Worth More Than Gold The Morning After a Night of Teaching Wizards To Gather Magic With Cards Necromancer of the Parched Sands in the Desert of Diona Necromancy-A Day in the Life of a Bumbling Necromancer-Again Nightmare Nook Paddlewheel Maintenance The Phooka's Dragon School The Red Hakama Springtime by the River Spirit-Walk Slippers Sticky Rice, Bare Fingers, and Slippery Chopsticks The Sweet and Sour of Lemons The Terror Bird 3 Perspectives on an Apple The Valuable Mystery of the Talking Saloon Door and How We Nearly Got Shot Over Stale Tacos Vendetta over Vittles A Very Important Clump of Grass Wagers and Wiles in the Godforsaken City The Washer Woman & The Fae Weather Forecasting Stones You Never Know What Info You Might Pick Up in the Afterlife aka Quaraun's Near Death Experience (A NDE Fiction) Or if after reading those, you still are looking for more free to read stories, there are over three thousand of them on this site, too many to list here, but here a few dozen to get you started... ...you can just jump in and try reading some of the free to read online stories first before committing to buying the books: Abyssal Addlepated: Stupid and Confused All the roads are gone Alone Ancient Coin Hoard Unearthed Angry Ocean Waves at Sunset The Arrival The Art of Destroying a Human Village for Fun and Profit At the High Priest's Altar Back At The Tavern and Still No Shrimp The Bandits and the Pink Necromancer The Banshee Sisters: Bean-Nighe and Ben-Neeyah In the Swamp of Death The Beacon Room at the Top of the Black Tower Lighthouse The Beauty of a Silk Moth Hatching The Beginning of the End Bellicose: Warlike! Aggressive! Hostile! Beneath a crimson sky, the silk weaver wove pink silk. Beneath Malevolent Stars The Black Sock, Again Blizzard The Boat Fiasco The Book Burning Maggots, a You Can't Spell Hatred Without Red Hats BoomFuzzy's Gingerbread House from Hell The Brownies & The Witch, or Why Faeries Don’t Wear Socks The Bumbling Pursuit of The Pink Necromancer Candied Nightmares The Candle Con in Ember Hollow The Candy Corn Unicorn Captured By The Lich Lord The Cast Iron Frying Pan Cattail Pollen Spaghetti with Wild "Oregano" A Chilly Light Drizzle Becomes Snowfall on the Shore Chocolate Bliss Chocolate in the Neon Shadows Christmas in 40th Century Dystopia Christmas With The Krampus Family The City of Death Clam Digging in the Rain The Clock Ticks Away Clotheslines, Games, and the Village Code Ghosts Comet Fall Snow Day Blitz Conundrum in the Bazaar Corsets, Elves, and Undead Faeries Crabapples in the Rain Cranberry Muffins The Crooked Dice The Crows Are Restless Crullers and Curses at Midnight The Curse of the Liquid Gold The Cursed Mirror Dangerous Tides {A Pink Necromancer Drabble Dozen, featuring Etiole} Dark Damp Basement A Day At Witch Pond & Fleeing To The Forest Deadly Shores of Noodle Beach The Demon Cultists and The Coming of The Darkness The Demonic Music Box Desolate Nostalgia on a Frozen Shoreline The Diamond Forest in the Bio Dome The Disbelief of Humans Discovering A Floating Castle Dismal Day at the Street Market The Doors' Dark Secret - A Wedding In A Zombie Apocalypse Dreams of Purple Pearls The Drunk Moon Elf Echoes of the Glass Forest Echoes of the Unseen An Eclipse in the Faerie Glen An Eclipse Looms Tonight An Eerie Discovery Eerie Symbols in the Snow The Egg That Was Not an Egg The Elf With Crippled Hands Ember Enable The Enchanted Map Encountering ghostly apparitions in the swamp Evil Eggplants Stalking Outside Evil McEvil of The Twirly Moustache Existential Crisis Perspectives - 3 Perspectives on an Existential Crisis Exploring the Swamp's Forgotten River A Fall in the River A Field of Poppies On The Road To Witch Pond 15 Drabbles About Being Transgender The First Flicker of Dawn Fishing in the Rain Five Ways To Save Money in Las Vegas Fizzy and Frigid A Flapdoodle Wizard’s Duel Fleeced for Fizz Fog & Peach Melba Toast After Last Night's Rain Footprints In The Sand Forest Kings and Their Antler Crowns The Fragrant Smoke of Flavoured Herbs Freshly Baked Sugar Cookies The Frilly Nest of Panic A Garden of Pink Chrysanthemums Get your hands off my dress! GhoulSpawn & The Cultists GhoulSpawn Said The Moon Don’t Laugh GhoulSpawn's Toasted Marshmallow Magic A Glass of Fresh Milk Gloom Blob of Doom: The Dreadful Dripping of the Doom Blob of Gloom Glumpish, Grumpy, Sullen, Gloomy Golden Field, Pink Glories The Golden Mask The Graveyard That Ate the Living The Great UnSeelie Court Swindlers He Always Comes Back Heirloom Tomatoes Help! He's trying to feed me! The Herd Approaches The Howl on Silent Moor How to Create a Literary Empire with Just Your Bum Poems How To Kill a Lich How to Hijack a Human Supply Train Without Getting Shot How to Overthrow an Entire Settlement Without So Much as Lifting a Finger I Need To Feel Safe Ignoramus — An Utterly Ignorant Crowd of Humans IkuTursu's Cursed Depths of the Swamp Where Pine Boughs Whisper Incandescent Shadows Over Driftwood Bay The Infected Survivor Inner Fortitude Insidious Love Invigorating Cool Air Iron Hooves and Burning Roads, Krampus on Wheels The Ivory Tower of Greed The Jar of Pickled Toes Jibber Jabber Ramblings by the Fire The Jolly Red Lich King Journey Through the Zombie-Infested Swamp on the Blue Monkey Judgement An Ode To The Lunatics Preaching The Rapture of September'25 Kelim and The Necromancer: Finding Finderu Kelim Meets Quaraun The Insane Lanterns Over the Faerie Glen Leaving Your Bed Messy Isn't Exactly the Apocalypse The Leprechaun of The Deep North A Lich's Lament For a Mortal Lover Growing Old A Lich's Reflections On Escaping The Swamp of Death The Lich's True Form Revealed The Lighthouse’s Glass-Eyed Horror The Lighthouse Keeper The Lighthouse That Leapt, Space Dock 13's First Jump Through Space The Long Road The Loot Tree Lord of the Hive Lost In The Forest of No Return-Trying To Find Directions The Lost Library and The Snowglobe The Lotus' Silent Prayer on the Sandy Shoreline Lover's Triangle Make tea and go for a rainy forest walk Maple Cotton Candy Served as a Topping on Vanilla Ice Cream A Market Day Disaster Market Day Weekend - Three Days In The Life of The Pink Necromancer Marsh Serenity Reflection Mayonnaise Meeting Mallac Melt, Ya Safe With Me The MerMan's Wrath Milkweed Meadow Mint, Madness, and Motor Parts The Mischief of the Purple Unicorn Misplaced Utensils and the Cascade of Confusion Monsters & Mayhem: How Black Tower Became Pink (8+ Parts) The Moon and The Drowned The Moon Goddess Laughs From The Rooftops The Moon That Hungers The Moon and The Mirror Morning Sickness at The Shattered Stein (TW: MPreg Yaoi) A Mysterious Door No Goldfish, Today? No Place for Birth The Noodle of Power Not Little Red Riding Hood Obsessive Love-Dangerous Love An Ode to My Shattered Sanity Ominous One River In Three Perspectives Open Grave An Ordinary Day A Path of Twisted Trees A Peaceful Night on the Tundra The Peaceful Shores of Noodle Beach Phantom Tides Pickling Perfection Pickles, Panic, & Permafrost The Picnic Pink Marabou Trimmed Rainbow Leg Warmers, a Purple Feathered Black Leather Codpiece, and an Emerald Green Overly Fluffy Scarf The Pink Necromancer's Deceitful Carpet Weave Pink Sheep, Cheesy Burritos, and The Grim Reality of Zombies Pliable Clay on the Potter's Wheel Pocket Lich Unleashed: Quaraun Murders Finderu Preparations for the Street Market of the GodForsaken City Psychotic Dead Things Quaraun's Beauty Makeovers Quaraun's Candle Business Quaraun's Irritable Day Quaraun and The Wandering Turtle City Quarreling Over the Last Slice of Pizza A Quiet Day on The Blue Monkey The Quiet Evening in the Pink Silk Tent A Quiet Evening In The Rain A Quiet Night on The River A Quiet Place To Sweep A Quiet, Relaxing Foot Rub The Rain-Drenched Alley Raining Cats & Dogs Readers vs Readers, What Really Makes a Reader, a Reader? Remove! The Return of ZooLock The River Boat Man-Woman The Sacred Pink Secret (TW: Mpreg Yaoi) Safety and Emergency System Activated. Please Being Calm Santa's Floating Dead Body Santa's Letter To Satan The Screaming Contest The Seagull Sea Slugs and Clam Chowder Bread Bowls Secret Meeting Hidden Behind Closed Doors Shadows on the Clam Flats Shipyard at Dusk The Silence of the Unseen Silks in the Snow The Singing Crabgrass Crabs — A Green Fairy Wine Tale A Sinister-Looking Stone Well Six Days Earlier The Snake's Prophecy of Doom Upon The Fractured Moon A Solitary Black Sock Spinning Dreams in Silk The Soul Eater Spacious Space Spooky Scary Skeletons - A Graveyard Waltz Stillness in the Garden's Chaos Stone Cakes for the Road Survival Preppers Of The Zombie Apocalypse The Swamp of Death The Tavern in the Faraway Town The Temple City of The Green Goddess, Where Every Street Has a Name The Terrifying Cliffs of Noodle Beach, featuring Etiole That Afternoon When Quaraun Got Stuck In a Crab Trap That Big Bad Darkness in His Heart A Threatening Letter Too Busy Cooking Lemon Tarts Toobe's Well-Prompted Apocalypse (A ChatBot Plans Global Domination) The Trade Caravan A Tumble In The River The Vacuous Tavern Fool Waiter, There's A Head In My Soup Wandering Merchant: The Trader’s Cryptic Goods (Part 2 of ShipYard At Dusk) What I Wish I Knew Before Not Becoming an Astrophysicist When a Government Tries to Cover Its Crimes Why the Sea is Salt A Winter Wizard Wishing For Lobster Rolls-Never Make Wishes In The Presence of Wizards WORMS! Wrath of the Sacred Pink JellyFish Yelling at the Snowstorm You've Only Known Our World Through The Eyes of a Madman You trust that nonsense over a map? Zombies Are Not the Worst Thing Here {TW: Love fucking wins} Zwodder: A Drowsy Stupid State of Mind Hmmm... soooo... I was making the above list to ALL the links to EVERY Quaraun story published on my website here, and adding it into the footer of my site, here as you can see, which loads on every page, and then I realized... wait... there are over two thousand Pink Necromancer stories up free to read on my website, I can't put two thousand links on every single page! Whoops! LOL! So, now I'm putting list to ALL the links to EVERY Quaraun story published on my website here on this page instead and just link that page to the footer instead. But also I'll just leave some of the links in the footer, as you can see above. FacebookXPinterestTumblrRedditWhatsApp ShareFacebookXPinterestTumblrRedditWhatsApp The Park Bench Method of Writing

The Park Bench Method of Writing

IMPORTANT NOTE:

All the writing prompts found here on my website, are also available in printed paperback editions, on Amazon.

There are no ebook editions as they are already available digitally here on my website.

Want even more writing prompts?

If anyone contacts you saying 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, is for sale, know that they are lying to you... it is my land, and it has been in my family since 1531... and the ONLY person whom has EVER gone around saying it is for sale, is a woman who the FBI believes to be the same woman who murdered my son.

My son is buried here, and the FBI believes she is trying to buy my land in order to destroy his grave and destroy evidence of his murder.

Since my son's murder November 14, 2013, every year dozens of real estate agent show up all with a story of a female developer who is offering them MILLIONS of dollars for my lot of land that is only 1/4 of an acre and is not big enough to develop.

When shown police sketches of my son's murderer, the real estate agents say "Yes, that's the woman who hired me to buy 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine", but then the woman disappears and the real estate agents never hear from her again... all contact information she gave them turns out to be fake.

The woman who murdered my son, is DESPERATELY trying to buy 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine... this is the woman to watch out for... and this is what she did:

Looking to find out more about my son's murder, that information is on these pages:

• How did the FBI get involved?

• Never Forget my son was murdered

• Do you know who this woman is? And no 146 Portland Ave is not for sale.

• Thoughts on Reborn Therapy Dolls After My Son's Murder

Answering the questions:
Can you give me links to the news reports of your son's murder? 
and
Why can't I find any news reports about this?

Maine has well over a thousand murder cases that have never been in the news.

I found this out after my son was murdered November 2013, and a year later I found out it had never been in the news, even though I was hounded for weeks by news people. I went to each of the over a dozen TV stations and newspapers whom had showed up at the hospital and asked why they had never published any report after all the trouble they had gone through to (in some cases illegally) het into the hospital to interview me.

in every case they said some version of "well, it just wasn't news worthy, there was nothing we could use to get views". Really? These were big news stations, channel 13, 6, 8, Portland Press Herald, Bangor Daily...

What exactly was it they claimed was "not news worthy"?

I'll tell you.

On November 14, 2013, my son was murdered. At Southern Maine Community College in the parking lot of The Buglight Art Studio beside the Spring Point Lighthouse.

I was 8 months pregnant, leaving my college classroom, and just getting into my car, when 3 strangers, a man and two women, armed with golf clubs leapt out from behind my car screaming "kill or be killed, kill the transvestite freaks, kill them all before they kill us! look at that thing! That is Ken's son, look at how it's dressed! kill the transvestite freaks! kill or be killed"... while the bald man and the red haired woman chanted this over and over, the blonde woman, lunged with the golf club.

She severed my spine, I am now a quadriplegic, and been paralyzed arms and legs, and in a wheelchair for 13 years now. She broke my hips, my knees, my legs, ruptured most of my discs, and shattered three of my vertebrae so bad that the shards of bone acted like glass and embedded themselves into my spinal column nerve bundle.

The attack also triggered labour.

My son was born in that parking lot, and he lived only a couple of minutes, before the deranged blonde woman, beat his head in and smashed his brains out, with the same golfclub she had just used to sever my spine and leave me crippled for the rest of my life.

Realizing that I was not transgender, and they'd just murdered a baby, the man grabbed the 2 women and forcibly dragged them away to a 4 door white pickup truck, and they left me there to die.

The FBI told me later, that a few weeks before this attack, and transwoman, had murdered a cis woman, in a parking lot, abou 20 miles away from where I was attacked. The FBI, believes that my attackers, had somehow found out I wrote transgender fiction, connecting my real name to my penname, (my father's name is in fact "Ken", and I do have a brother) and believed that I wrote transgender fiction, because I was myself transgender, even though I'm not transgender. The FBI, believes the attackers, thought I was my brother, pretending to be a woman.

The FBI investigation, into my son's murder, has dragged on for 13 years, and still now in 2026, continues on, with the FBI, still not having yet identified my attackers, and only guessing at what their motive was.

Oh yeah, and I've been quadriplegic for 13 years.

oh yeah one more thing, same trio, they also found out where i lived in Old Orchard Beach and drove a backhoe over my house as well.

146 Portland Ave Old Orchard Beach, Maine... July 4, 2013 vs August 8, 2013

I have been homeless and quadriplegic for 13 years, and right now it's just a few weeks away from both my son's 14th birthday and the 14th anniversary of the day he was murdered, both of which happened the same day.

Explain to me what about any of that is "not newsworthy"?

I did find out WHY it was deemed not newsworthy. "it would negatively impact tourism" was their reason. The College at Fort Prebble is a tourist destination. The lighthouse at the college is a tourist destination. My house on Portland ave is situated on the primary road to the beach that is a tourist destination.

The news reporters explained to me that, they risked losing their jobs if they publicised "negative news" occurring in these sorts of tourist destination spots.

My son's murder wasn't in the news, because it might cause tourists to stop visiting that lighthouse. That was the reason the reporters gave me.

How often are there things not being reported on just so businesses don't lose tourist money?

How often does this happen? A lot, I've since found out. In trying to find other mothers of murdered children to interact with... I found five others JUST in Old Orchard Beach, whom the murders were not in the news, and all of them happened after my son's murder. I found 2 such mothers in Scarbourogh, their children's murders not in the news. I found over a dozen more in the Bar Harbore area, also all not in the news.

It's a very disturbing trend here in Maine, one that I never would have found out about had my own son not been murdered.

One thing's very clear: in Maine you can get away with murdering a child, if you do it in a big tourist location, because news stations REFUSE to report any crime occurring in tourist locations.

Fuck torists.

I don't give a shit about your precious tourist money.

My son was murdered and I want his killer found... and I am VERY displeased with the deplorable way news stations try to bury child murders in Maine, just to appease tourist funded businesses.

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This website is a safe zone for LGBTQAI+, pagans, and BIOPIC communities.

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