---

November 14, 2023 will be the 10 year anniversary of the November 14, 2013 murder of my 8 month old infant son, at BugLight Lighthouse Art Studio of Southern Maine Community College in South Portland, Maine. If you have any information about who his killer is, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

NEVER FORGET:

My Son Was Murdered, The Killer Walks Free, Your Child Could Be Next!

---

FAQ: What are the most visited pages on this website and how many visits do they get?

Several years ago, I wrote an article on how to write different types of magic uses, or rather how I personally write various types of magic users within the context of my Quaraun books. Today that page is one of my top ten most visited articles. It gets 50 to 500 views/reads/hits/visits per day depending on the time of the years and has had over 200k visits total since it was published.

Amphibious Aliens: Debunking The Atwater Family's Alien Abduction Hoax with more then 30MILLION reads since 2007 and The GoldenEagle: Debunking Stephen King's World's Most Haunted Car Hoax with over tenMILLION reads since 2007 still rank as the two most visited articles on my website, but, neither of those are writing related.

Writing Medieval Servants is my most visited writing related article with over 7MILLION reads.

This website was started in 1996 and has 1 to 3 new articles (all written by me, I am the only writer on this site) published almost daily. In 2017 we crossed ten thousand articles published. As of 2023, EACH article gets MINIMUM 10 to 70 reads PER DAY, with the high traffic articles getting 500+ reads per day.

And since December 2019, my website now gets three hundred thousand to 7 million reads per month - well over ONE HUNDRED MILLION PAGE READS PER YEAR, making it not only the single most trafficked site in the State of Maine, but also one of the most visited websites in ALL OF NEW ENGLAND!

{{{HUGS}}} Thank you to all my readers for making this possible!

---

---

 TRIGGERED! I'm a Straight Cis Woman, but I am deemed Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach, Are you too gay for the bigoted, minority harassing, white power, gay hating psychos of The Old Orchard Beach Town Hall Too? 

---

---

---

---

---

---

---

---

The Journey Begins:

Chapter ??

The Enchanted Map

(Bizarro Dark Fantasy Yaoi free sample chapter to read online)

(No clue what chapter it is, it's anyone's guess; I did not chapter this novel, yet. You are seeing the pre-publication draft edition of it here, which is not yet edited. The published print edition may be different.)

---

---

The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane
Volume 4 of 130

The Journey Begins:

Chapter ??

The Enchanted Map

(Bizarro Dark Fantasy Yaoi free sample chapter to read online)

(No clue what chapter it is, it's anyone's guess; I did not chapter this novel, yet. You are seeing the pre-publication draft edition of it here, which is not yet fully edited. The published print edition may be different.)

---

Please Note: The Quaraun Series Is Rated M18+ and you must be 18 or older to buy it.

Why is the Quaraun Series Rated M18+?

---

You can Find out more about the main characters here:

• Quaraun the Insane
• BoomFuzzy the Unicorn
• GhoulSpawn the Crazed

---

Please note, this site is the Home Site for The Adventures of The Pink Necromancer aka The Quaraun Series.

The Quaraun series is a set of 130 Fantasy novels about a suicidal, drug addicted, serial killing, transvestite wizard.

Due to the content of the books, you must be 18 or older to buy them and they are sold under M18+ ratings in countries that require book ratings on the cover.

Most pages on EelKat.com are either sample chapters from these Dark Fantasy Yaoi novels or how-to advice and Q&As about writing Dark Fantasy Bizarro Yaoi, and thus many pages feature mention of suicide, drug use, cutting, depression, BDSM fetishes especially CBT, schizophrenia, ritual murder, and thus many pages are probably NSFW.

Reader discretion is advised.

---

---

---

---

---

---

---

---

---

---

---

---

The Journey Begins:

Chapter ??

The Enchanted Map


(Bizarro Dark Fantasy Yaoi free sample chapter to read online)

(No clue what chapter it is, it's anyone's guess; I did not chapter this novel, yet. You are seeing the pre-publication draft edition of it here, which is not yet fully edited. The published print edition may be different.)

_{<<< Previous Chapter:}

~o0o~ Chapter  ~o0o~

The trio had been walking most of the day. Quaraun, having walked more or less around the entire globe and back several times now, was used to endless walking, but he new companions, never having taken up life on the road before, were finding it difficult to keep up with the High Elf's steady pace. The first few weeks of travel, he had slowed down so they could keep up, but now he was lost in his head, thinking his usual dark and morbid thoughts of death, dying, and suicide and was no more paying attention to his companions, thus Quaraun once again had picked up his usually brisk pace and BeaLuna and Bullgaar found themselves falling behind.

"Quaraun!" BeaLuna called ot. "Wait up! Quaraun!"

"He's not listening," Bullgaar said.

"I can see that," the Gnome said. "QUARAUN!" She yelled even louder.

Quaraun stop walking, pricked up his foot long ears and listened to the air.

"Finally!" BeaLuna said as she ran to catch up with the Moon Elf. "I've been trying to get your attention for the last half hour. Do you have any idea..."

"Shut up," Quaraun snapped. "I'm trying to listen."

"Listen? To what? You certainly ain't been listening to me, that's for sure. I've never seen any one so damned self-absorbed..."

"I'm an Elf. I don't have time for your emotional pitter patter...."

"Emotional pitter patter? Quaraun, you are the most arrogant, self-righteous, unemotional..."

"I'm an Elf. Get used to it. Now shut up!"

"I most certainly will not shut up! Just because you're an Elf doesn't give you the right..."

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

BeaLuna immediately stopped talking. She and Quaraun had grown up together, but it had been many years since they had last seen each other. As a child, he had been a shy, quiet, timid little boy who never raised his voice to any one. Even as a young adult he had been that way. But that was 300 years ago. Quaraun was a much older, middle aged Elf now, no longer the little Elfling she had been used to. He'd never yelled at her before. She had never heard him yell at any one before. She had not imagined he even could yell. So she was quite taken by by it now that he had yelled at her.

"You've changed," she said quietly.

"The whole world has changed, BeaLuna, or haven't you noticed?"

"You've become bitter. Angry. You didn't used to be like this."

"I used to have a family."

"I know. I'm sorry."

"It's getting late. We need to find a place to set up camp."

Quaraun began walking again. BeaLuna and Bullgaar followed, but remained silent now.

"Quaraun?" BeaLuna asked timidly.

"What?"

"Have you been alone this whole time?"

"Yes."

"But it's been 300 years."

"So?"

"That's a long time to be alone."

"It's not like any one cared."

"I did. I still do. I would have gone with you. But I didn't know where you went. You just ran off after... after... your wife, and your children, and your father, and the king, and the whole village. Everyone was dead and you... you ran off into the woods and... I couldn't find you."

"Did you try to?"

"Yeah. I did."

"From what I saw last week, it looked like you never left the village. You were still there when I came back after all. And you're a Gnome. How did you stay alive for 300 years?"

"I don't know."

"You haven't aged a day since I last saw you. Can you explain that."

"No."

"BeaLuna, you were standing in the exact same place, you were standing, the day everyone died."

"So?"

Quaraun stared down at the tiny Flower Gnome.

"So? I'm prone to hallucinations, and I haven't seen anything to indicate to me that you are anything other than a figment of my imagination."

"Bullgaar too?"

"Bullgaar too."

"So people have called you insane so often now that you've started to believe it?"

"I'm an outcast Elf. Do you even know what that means?"

"You've been cut out the hive mind. You can't mentally communicate with other Elves any more."

"I'm alone inside my body, the same way a Human is now and I hate it. I've been cut out of Elf society and no one cares."

"I care."

"You've yet to convince me you're real."

"And you've yet to convince me you're evil."

"I'm a Necromancer."

"Who's dressed like a pink prostitute."

"Will you stop complaining about my clothes."

"The only thing I've ever seen you resurrect are roses."

"I like roses."

"Yeah. You always did."

"Well you stop following me."

"No."

"Why?"

"I haven't seen you in 300 years. We used to be best friends. You used to tak to me."

"I'm talking to right now aren't I?"

"This is not the same, Quaraun, and you know it. You used to tell me everything."

"And you used to tell my father everything I said."

BeaLuna stepped back. Quaraun's anger was flaring, and grew worse at the mention of his father.

Quaraun stomped off angrily, but once again stopped abruptly, twitching his ears and listening.

"What do you keep hearing?"

"I don't know."

Quaraun looked back behind them, staring down the road. Then looked ahead of them.

"I feel like someone is following us."

BeaLuna also looked up and down the road, but the road of fairly straight and quite a long distance of absolutly no one on the road, could be seen in either direction.

"I don't see anyone."

"Niether do I. But I heard someone."

"Well, you got ears like a rabbit. You can hear stuff from a few miles away, can't you?"

"Yes. But I can also tell distance and... it was close. Very close." 

Quaraun looked out into the forest. Blueberry fields, scattered with young pines and oaks, lay to the West. To the East was a cliff that tumbled down into a ravine, before ambling off into the ocean not far away.

"Could be a bear," BeaLuna said. "Right time of year for it. Bear like blueberries."

"Yes. Could be a bear," Quaraun agreed.

The Elf started walking again and his two companions followed him. Quaraun once again pulled his map out of his bag and began reading it while he walked.

"Does that thing really change to tell us where we are?" BeaLuna asked.

"It's supposed to, but it's not working right now."

"What's it doing?"

He stopped and showed it to her. The enchanted map was an ancient brown scrap of crumbling paper. The map itself was drawn out in what looked to be crayons, and was very childish, as though drawn by a toddler. A long road spanned ahead and behind, exactly as was the road on which they stood. Cerulean blue crayon waves scribbled their way back and forth across the East side of the map, water splashing up out of the paper, as each wave drew itself anew. To the West big cartoon blueberry stick men ran back and forth, while yelling: "Eat me!" 

"Uhm... the blueberries are talking," BeaLuna said.

"Yes, whenever food shows up, it starts yelling 'Eat me!' to let us know we are near food. The Elf Eater liked food and he designed the map to show him whenever food was nearby. He almost starved to death one winter, as a child, and he became obsessed with food as a result. He's quite a good chef actually."

"You, sound like you know him."

"I did know him. I like him. Quite a lot actually. I rather wish he was here."

"Quaraun, don't go making wishes, again."

"Did I wish for something?"

"Yes you did."

"Oh dear. Why do I keep doing that."

"I don't know. Anybody else says 'I wish' and nothing happened. You say it and all hell breaks loose."

"I'm a DiJinn. It comes with the job. It's not just my wishes. It happens whenever I hear any one wish for something too."

"Can't you control it?"

"No. I don't even know how it is I do it. It just happens."

"It wouldn't be so bad if you got the wishes right for once."

"It's not like I try to make bad things happen. You don't know what it's like being a wish granting wizard and never knowing what's gonna happen when you grant someone's wish. Why do you think I avoid living around people. 'I wish' comes out of people's mouths all day long. Force of habit. And they never mean it."

"Well, why do you do it then."

"Do what?"

"You keep saying 'I wish' at the beginning of all your sentences and YOU of all people should know better then to do it!"

"I don't know. What did I wish for this time?"

"You wished for The Elf Eater of pepper Valley to be here."

"Did I? Oh dear."

"I mean, what is wrong with you? Why the Elf Eater of Pepper Valley of all people? He's a mass murdering bastard! Serial killing war lord. Serial rapist pervert. He kills people for the fun of it."

"Well, I guess it's a good thing he's dead," Bullgaar said.

"Bullgaar," BeaLuna chidded. "You don't understand. He's a Necromancer. If he wishes for a dead person to be here, they're gonna rise up from the grave and be here."

"That true?" Bullgaar asked Quaraun.

"Yeah."

Quaraun recalled that he had earlier wished the talk to BeaLuna, and she had suddenly showed up, exactly where it was he had last seen her, not looking a day older then the day... the day he had killed every one in his village. He tried to remember if she had been ome that day. She had lived next door. He couldn't remember. Hadn't BeaLuna died with everyone else?

And what about Bullgaar? Quaraun thought sure he had killed Bullgaar that night in the tavern, yet, here he was. Silent as a grave most of the time, but following Quaraun every where anyways.

Where they both dead? Had he somehow wished them back to life? 

Quaraun didn't know what to think.

BeaLuna went back to examining the map while Quaraun ran these thoughts through his head.

"So," BeaLuna finally said. "What's wrong with it? I mean, it looks like it is showing us exactly where it is we are."

"Look closer," Quaraun said, pointing to the place on the road that marked their position on the map.

BeaLuna looked at the enchanted map for a moment, at first not seeing what Quaraun meant, but then she saw it...

She looked up the road ahead of them. Then looked back behind them. Then looked back down at the map again. 

"It shows 4 people standing in the road."

"Yes."

"But there's only 3 of us."

"Exactly."

"Bullgaar look at this." 

BeaLuna handed the map to the half-Dwarf-half-Hill Giant.

After a bit of explaining, because because Bullgaar had not been listening, BeaLuna quickly got the Hill Giant Dwarf back up to speed.

"So, you're saying the map says someone is following us, but we can't see them?" Bullgaar asked.

"Yes," Quaraun answered. "That's exactly what the map is telling us."

"So, why can't we see them?"

BeaLuna didn't give Quaraun a chance to answer.

"Faeries," BeaLuna said, fear dripping from her voice. "Quaraun, are we in a Fae Forest?"

"Possibly."

Quaraun looked around at the not very tall trees. "Though it doesn't look like it. Fae like big trees. Old growth pines. Hundreds of feet tall. There's nothing like that around here. Can't be a tree over 30 feet tall for as far as I can see."

As Quaraun said this, a giant pine tree drew itself onto the map, but as no one was looking at the map just then, no one noticed.

"There's one," Bullgaar said, pointing to the road ahead.

Quaraun turned and looked to see what Bullgaar was pointing to. There not 20 yards ahead of them, stood a massive ancient pine tree, well over a hundred feet tall.

"That wasn't there a minute ago," Quaraun said.

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. I'm an Elf. I would have noticed a tree like that. How curious."

_{<<< Previous Chapter:}

_{Next Chapter:  >>>}

Volume 4: The Journey Begins

Picking up immediately where The Night of The Screaming Unicorn ends... Quaraun continues on his way to Inuvik, intending to kill himself once he arrives home, only to find that in his 300 year absence, a Human village has been built up over the remains of the decimated Moon Elf village.

Quaraun's sanity wavers more than ever, as he questions the reality of his two traveling companions, both of whom he is certain he murdered years ago. Quaraun decides to head back to the coast in search of the Unicorn, but can't shake the feeling he's being followed. 

BeLuna the Gnome, oddly still alive these 300 years after the destruction of the Moon Elf Village and still sitting in the exact same spot where Quaraun had left her 300 years ago, joins the Elf in his search for the Unicorn.

Annoyingly for Quaraun, BeLuna disappears whenever any one else is around and is nowhere to be found when he crosses paths with a gang of Elf hating drunk Dwarves and again when Orcs show up.

Wandering aimlessly through the forest, lost and now accompanied by a disappearing Gnome and a silent Dwarf, Quaraun is at a loss to explain who his companions are or why they are following him. Rumors that the serial killing Pink Necromancer is now travelling the countryside building an army of Gnomish Ghosts and Dwarven Zombies doesn't help matters any.

Things are not right with Quaraun's two new companions, and it takes an Undead Unicorn to show the Necromancer there are some things no one else can see.

---

TRIGGER WARNING:

This volume contains heavy use of suicide, cutting, and depression  references, including graphic on page descriptions of cutting and suicide attempts.

If you suffer from depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, or are easily upset by such things, it is highly recommended that you avoid reading any of this novel.

(Some of these free to read online sample chapters are NSFW)

---

The Journey Begins, is Part 2 of The Night of The Screaming Unicorn:

List of the currently available free to read online chapters:

---

Home Again

---

The Gnome That Refused To Stay Dead

---

Raped By The Mountain Dwarf

---

Alone Again

---

Bullgaar the Vulgar (NSFW)

---

The Dwarf's Wife

---

A Dwarf In The Night

---

Gnomes and Dwarves That Are Not There

---

The Enchanted Map

---

The Black Jaguar/The Phooka

---

The Elf Eater of Pepper Valley/That Bastard Murdered Me! Wait? Why Aren't I Dead?

---

The Double Dicked Unicorn

---

How To Properly Fuck an Elf

---

Humans For Dinner

---

Another Day, Another Town

---

Ooloff The Stupid

---

Oolong The Wise

---

Waiter, There's a Head In My Soup

---

The Orcs and The Necromancer (NSFW)

---

---

---

---

---

---

---

What do you want to become? 
What did you do today to step closer to that goal?
Whatever you do, be your best at it!
And remember to have yourself a great and wonderfully glorious day!

~EK
EelKat.com
pinterest.com/eelkat/

By EelKat Wendy C Allen

If you ever made fun of or had any part in the destruction of my farm, and the illegal selling of half of my land to Colliard, you shall lose your land.

If you ever made fun of or had any part in my being homeless since 2006 - YES, I AM still homeless in 2023, you shall become homeless.

If you ever made fun of or had any part in the backhoe driving over my house, you shall lose your house.

If you ever made fun of or had any part in my car being cut in half, you shall lose your car.

If you ever made fun of or had any part in my becoming crippled, you shall lose your health.

If you ever made fun of or had any part in the murder of my son, your child shall die an equally horrible death. If you haven't got a child to lose, it will be a brother or sister or parents or spouse or whomever you love the most, and that you should know it was this curse which you brought upon yourself that killed them, they will die on exactly the 7 year anniversary of the very first time, you mocked the death of my child.

Evil men go out of their way to try to drive a person to suicide.

Are you an evil man?

Are you sure you're not?

How many people have YOUR hate filled words killed?

Next time you go to do a mean thing to a fellow human, stop and really think about the consequences of your actions.

Did you ever notice how every one has a story to tell about me, yet not one of them ever speaks the truth?

What lies has YOUR gossiping tongue spread about me?

Did you know...

October 16, 2006, bomb blew up my house because of YOUR lies.

August 8, 2013, the house which replaced the one the bomb blew up, was driven over by a backhoe.

November 14, 2013, my 8 month old infant son was murdered because of your lies.

November 14, 2013, I was beaten up, paralized for 5 months, spent 18 weeks relearning to walk, I'm now crippled for the rest of my life, because of YOUR lies.

Are you proud of what you have done?

Enjoy your eternity in Hell. You earned it. You've certainly worked hard for it.

~EelKat

If you have any information about any of these events, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

Please note, this site is the Home Site for The Adventures of The Pink Necromancer aka The Quaraun Series.

The Quaraun series is a set of 2,000 short stories and 130 Fantasy novels about a suicidal, drug addicted, serial killing, transvestite wizard.

Due to the content of the books, you must be 18 or older to buy them and they are sold under M18+ ratings in countries that require book ratings on the cover.

These morbid novels do not have happy endings, and main character Quaraun's depression, suicidal nature, and drug use gets worse as the series progresses. If you are looking for cheerful, happy stories, these novels are not for you.

Most pages on EelKat.com are either sample chapters from these Dark Fantasy Yaoi novels or how-to advice and Q&As about writing Dark Fantasy Bizarro Yaoi, and thus many pages feature mention of suicide, drug use, cutting, depression, BDSM fetishes especially CBT, schizophrenia, ritual murder, and thus many pages are probably NSFW.

Please be aware that this site is considered an "Adult Entertainment" website and by viewing it you agree that you are over the age of 18 years old.

Reader discretion of both the Quaraun novels and the pages of this website is advised.

The Quaraun Series 

Meet The Characters:

Quaraun the Insane

BoomFuzzy the Unicorn

GhoulSpawn the Crazed

ZooLock the Great

Quaraun's World:

Characters: Transgender, Transexual, Transvestite, or Intersex? What is Quaraun? Writing Demisexual Characters Advice On Writing A Bisexual Character  Writing Genderfluid Characters Writing Transgender Characters Giving Your Characters Flaws and Goals How long does it take for your characters to fall in love with each other? What makes a strong male lead? Fantasy Names From Real World Cultures The Reader Impact of Minor Character Deaths How to Write a Sleazy Male (Villain/Bad Guy)  Need help writing characters of color | EelKat on racist white readers

Culture: What Makes An Elf, An Elf? Phookas Marriage In Elf Society What would happen if an Elf adopted a Human baby? One volume of the series has a 97% return rate? Here's why... Albino Races - Moon Elves In The Quaraun Series Need advice on how to write diverse characters. Suicide, Rape, and Abuse In The Quaraun Series Accents in Dialogue How to Handle Writing Fantasy-Horror That Features Violence Against Children The Banshee Sisters: Bean-Nighe and Ben-Neeyah An Elf Gone Mad: The Rise of The Pink Necromancer

Magic: Witches, Wizards,  Sorcerers, & How They Are Different Explaining Quaraun's 58 Piercings and Jewelry Obsessions  Bumbling Wizards and Their Spell Casting Side Effects High Elves Getting High Gypsy Colour Magic How to knock someone unconscious with magic? Necromancy: How will resurrection affect society as a whole? Child Sacrifice in Fantasy Novels Building a Magical System: A Questionnaire What is a God in Your Universe? Elves, Drugs, and Opium  Love Spell To Keep Your Boyfriend In Love With You

The World: What will a traveler encounter on the roads? Why is there a kitchen sink in my pocket? How To Write Slice-of-Life, Travelogue Style Literary Fantasy Books Writing Evil Unicorns Twerking Dragons Why do Lovecraftian beings come to earth? What number of continents are in your fantasy world? Did you know the town the series is set in is a real place you can visit? World-building In The Quaraun Series Calculating the weight of gold in AD&D Turning Scenes, Into Stories & Writing Travelogue Style Fantasy Books

The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane:  First draft/sample chapters from the  novels.

NOTE: The scenes and chapters featured here, are from the unedited first drafts, and NOT from the finished published novels. This was done because many readers had asked to see what the first drafts looked like to see how different they were from the finished product. Because these are from the unedited first drafts, they contain spelling and grammar errors, typos, and sections that are still unrevised. These errors are corrected in the final published editions.

More sample chapters can be found here: (note, while these chapters are linked in chronological order, they are not continuing one to the next, they are chapters spanning from Volume 1 all the way to volume 119, of a series that has 130 novels/volumes.)

Pink Links are pages on this site. Green links go to the pages found on my DeviantArt account.

Chapter 1: King Gwallmaiic & The Sacred Pink JellyFish (Chapter 1 of the entire series)

BoomFuzzy's Gingerbread House From Hell

The Dying Elf, Gibedon's Head, and King Gwallmaiic's Elf Eating Mansion

Santa Claus: Lich Of The North Pole

An Elf Gone Mad: The Rise of The Pink Necromancer

I Loved My Children, But I Loved BoomFuzzy More

Doe'Uan and The Lonely Elf

Finding Finderu 

Kelim Meets Quaraun The Insane

Pocket Lich Unleashed: Quaraun Murders Findaru

Captured By The Lich Lord 

An Elf and a Lich in the Gingerbread Pit

The Lich's True Form Revealed 

Bullgaar the Vulgar 

The Enchanted Map

Waiter, There's a Head In My Soup

The Orcs and The Necromancer 

The Valley of the Katopas (Part 1)

The Valley of the Katopas (Part 2)

The Beginning of the End

The Witch Massimara Of Mount Yenka

Psychotic Dead Things

Six Days Earlier

There is no Mournful Lamb Inn

The Swamp of Death

The Dungeon Master & The 1974 AMC Gremlin

Introducing GhoulSpawn

The Demon Cultists & The Coming of The Darkness

EelKat and The Kats of Planet Ptarmagin

The Moon Elves of Ivujivik

The Return of ZooLock The Great

The Gremlin's Warning

A Field of Poppies On The Road To Witch Pond

The Road To Witch Pond (Part 2)

The Road To Witch Pond (Part 3)

Santa's Dead Floating Body

Worms!

GhoulSpawn and Quaraun Trapped With A Phooka

The Banshee Sisters: Bean-Nighe and Ben-Neeyah In the Swamp of Death

A Fourth Letter To Home - The Masochistic Elf With Stockholm Syndrome

GhoulSpawn and Quaraun Trapped With A Phooka

The Strange Village or I Love The Smell Of Decomposing Bodies In The Morning

The Golden Rooster

Meeting Mallac

Serial Killer At Large

The Summoner of Darkness

Corsets, Elves, and Undead Faeries.

Visiting The Scene of Murder #1 With An UnGelded Stallion

I Never Wanted To Be a Wizard

Sheep Again

Back At The Tavern and Still No Shrimp

A Tavern Scene Part 3 - Quaraun, Unicorn, GhoulSpawn, - Time Travel, Chastity Cages, and Whores

Tumbling Down Stairs With Slutty Elves and Angry Liches

Where Are You Hiding That Horse?

The Hostess Twinkie Aisle of Biddeford WalMart

Quaraun Meets HellBorne The Evil

The Map of the Town

Quaraun Meets BatDude & Pigeon Poop Boy

Pepperell Square, Saco, Maine, In The Year 2525

No Goldfish, Today?

Chocolate Covered Elves 

Evil Elves 

How To Kill A Lich

The Lover's Triangle 

At Gremlin's House / Kill The Baby

I Am Not GhoulSpawn

Sheep

Santa's Letter to Satan 

Going North To Head South

Alone

In Black Tower

You've Only Known Our World Through The Eyes of a Madman

"Sold! To Zebulon, for two million dollars."

The Last of The Moon Elves

FarDarrig and The Baby That Never Should Have Been 

Answering Reader Question About The Quaraun Series:

Quaraun Free To Read Online Complete Chapter Index In Chronological Order

Fantasy World Building...Writing Fantasy Books  | World Building For Authors | My Answers To The Zaharam-Chapelle-Parunas  Ethnographical Questionnaire and More...

Answering Reader Questions About The Quaraun Series

Behind the Scenes:
A Look At How I Write The Quaraun Series...

Question Everything Before Putting It In Your World  The Quaraun series is a set of 130 Fantasy novels about a suicidal, drug addicted, serial killing, bi-sexual, polyamorous/polygamous, masochistic, time traveling transvestite Elf wizard, his sex crazed, sadistic, drug dealing unicorn, and their bloodthirsty sentient house.  The Quaraun series contains heavy use of the following: suicide drug use cutting depression polygamy BDSM sex fetishes CBT (cock and ball torture)  sounding knoting barbed penises and toothed vaginas  monsters eating Humans blood thirsty Faeries Elves eating Elves Faeries eating Elves squid headed aliens eating brains out of still alive victims medieval torture schizophrenia stockholm syndrome sadism masochism rape incest dub-con necromancy necrophillia ritual murder flaying (skinning a person alive) child sacrifice cannibalism bloodletting vampirism (the mental illness, not the mythical creature) crude language (including an excessive use of the words fuck, cock, dick, testicals, balls, scrotum, and penis)  interracial relationships M/m/m relationships gay men bisexual men transvestite men men who have sex with unicorns(horses) tentacle porn sex with squid headed aliens shape-shifter sex ménage à trois relationships double dicked men tripple dicked penitration gay sex scenes bananas, pickles, candy canes, unicorn horns, and glass wizard wands used as dildos main character Quaraun is a man with 4 wives (one of whom is also his sister, another of whom is also his daughter)   Quaraun has 2 male lovers Quaraun has 4 children by his sister Quaraun has 3 children by his daughter Quaraun has 1 child that is the result of him raping a woman Quaraun has 37 children by prostitutes the primary secondary character, Unicorn, is a chemist "candy maker" and detailed instruction of how he makes his drugs, including recipes to do so are included in the novels

The Quaraun series has been banned by the following: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints aka The Mormon Church  (1991) (Reason: too much sex) (Interestingly, there were no sex scenes in the series before 2014) The Arundel Christian Tabernacle, Biddeford-Arundel, Maine  (2001) (Reason: evil and influenced by Satan) New Life Church, Biddeford, Maine  (2003) (Reason: Too gay for the family friendly church) (Interestingly, there were no gay characters in the series before 2014) Fan-Fiction.net  (2012) (Reason: Too violent) Curtis Lake Church, Sanford, Maine  (2013) (Reason: Too gay for the family friendly church) (Interestingly, there were no gay characters in the series before 2014 and I added gay characters to the series BECAUSE of this false complaint) Old Orchard Beach Town Hall of the Town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine, a division of the United States of America Government  (January 4, 2016 via court order)(State of Maine, Biddeford District Court: Docket #BDDC-PA-2015-00574)  (Reason #1: Too gay for the family friendly town of Old Orchard Beach)(Reason #2: Contains transgender characters  depicted as living in Old Orchard Beach, in violation of the ordinance which states Old Orchard Beach is a "Family Friendly Town" by virtue of it's ban on LGBTQ+ residents) 27 volumes of the Quaraun novels were forced to be unpublished/removed from Amazon by the government issued court order that cited these books as "Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach" NOTE: As a result of this ban, and my discovery that OOB had an ordinance banning LGBTQ citizens from living in our town, an additional court case rose up, and on October 21, 2016, Alfred Superior Court overruled the ordinance banning LGBTQs in OOB, AND overturned the town hall's ban on the Quaraun series, citing that both the ordinace baning LGBTQ residents and the court order ordering the Quaraun books to be removed from Amazon.comto be "gross violations of civil rights".) Did you notice how 3 different places used the exact same phrase of "Too gay for the family friendly..." In each of these three cases the exact same minister was behind the ban.

Do you agree? #reading #quote pic.twitter.com/t3VjaM6UE7

— Janneke Jobsis-Brown (@JJobsisBrown) March 1, 2018

---

Sample Chapters of Many of the Novels Are Available To Read Online:

Vol.1 Night of the Screaming Unicorn | Read Online Chapter Index

Vol.2 Kelim and The Necromancer - Chapter Index Volume 5: The Vampire Leprechaun of Fire Mountain Vol.8 Quaraun and the Vampire Into The Swamp Of Death - Chapter Index Vol. 11 The Summoner of Darkness - Chapter Index

Vol. 3 BoomFuzzy | Free To Read Online Chapter Index Volume 6: The Obsidian Idol of The Elf Eater of Pepper Valley Volume 9: The City of The Screaming Statues Volume 12: Captain Quirk & The Pirate Ship Rent-A-Prize

Volume 4: The Journey Begins Volume 7: The Vulgar Alchemist's Inn Volume 10: The Last Katopa Volume 13: King Gwallmaiic, The Elf Eater of Pepper Valley

Volume 00: 000000

Volume 00: 000000 Volume 00: 000000 Volume 00: 000000 Volume 24: The Dread Chant of the Fan Boys

Volume 00: 000000 Volume 00: 000000 Vol. 22. GhoulSpawn & The Lich Lord's Lover - Chapter Index Volume 00: 000000

Volume 17: The Tower of The Shape Shifting Fuzzy Wuzzy Fluffy Bunnies Volume 00: 000000 Volume 23: The Return To Fire Mountain Volume 00: 000000

Volume 27: The Sorcerer's Tower of Cake

Volume 00: 000000 Volume 31: The Crystal Palace of Mt. Demontooth Volume 00: 000000 Vol. 37 Lost In a Space That Isn't There: Chapter Index

Volume 00: 000000 Volume 00: 000000 Vol. 35 The Jiggler & The G-String Teddy Bears - Chapter Index Volume 00: 000000

Volume 00: 000000 Vol. 33 GhoulSpawn The Crazed & The Rose Garden of the Pink Necromancer - Chapter Index Volume 00: 000000 Volume 00: 000000

Volume 48: A Baby For The Necromancer

Volume 00: 000000 Volume 58: Zebulon's Captive Volume 00: 000000 106: The Haunted Lighthouse

Volume 00: 000000 Vol. 59 The City of the Slushies Volume 00: 000000 Volume 107: The Battle of Ongadada

Volume 00: 000000 Volume 00: 000000 Volume 00: 000000 Volume 108: Friends Are Forever (Volume 1 of The Twighlight Manor series)

Volume 119: My Two Favorite People

---

Please Note: The Quaraun Series Is Rated M18+ and you must be 18 or older to buy it.

Most pages on EelKat.com are about writing, publishing, marketing, and CosPlaying Dark Fantasy, Bizarro, Gorn,  Monster Porn, Torture Porn, CBT, Psychedelic Literature, Weird Lovecraftian Horror, Pink Humour Satire, & BDSM Yaoi.

With this in mind, some pages may not be safe for work and are marked as: [NSFW].

Reader discretion is advised.

Why is the Quaraun Series Rated M18+?

---

Book publishing hiatus: November 14, 2013 I was beaten up by a woman who claimed to be a unpublished author. I was paralyzed for 5 months and am still 4 years later relearning to use my legs & arms. While I was cripple, offline, and recovering these past 4 years, she next proceeded to hack my website and most all of my forum and social network accounts.

April 2015 she returned, filled my motorhome with 1,000s of gallons of feces/raw sewage and cut my cats heads off nailing them to my door. 10 cats are currently still missing. 

October 2006 she blew up my house with a bomb, in May 2013 put a bomb in my classroom at college, November 2015 put a bomb in my department where I work at Walmart, and June 2016 put yet another bomb in WalMart. The FBI is trying to identity of this woman. More info about these terrorist attacks on my family can be found here: https://www.eelkat.com/1667Words.html

If you have any information about this woman, please contact the FBI agent in charge of the case, his contact info is on that page.