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Homepage for the Fantasy series:
The Adventures of The Pink Necromancer, Quaraun The Insane
-- ten MILLION copies sold and counting!
Founded in 1996, we are Maine's Oldest, Largest, & Most Trafficked Website.
Home to more than 10,000 articles aimed at helping young authors worldbuild, create characters, write novellas, edit manuscripts, design book covers, and self publish their work.
November 14, 2023 will be the 10 year anniversary of the November 14, 2013 murder of my 8 month old infant son, at BugLight Lighthouse Art Studio of Southern Maine Community College in South Portland, Maine. If you have any information about who his killer is, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322
My Son Was Murdered, The Killer Walks Free, Your Child Could Be Next!
FAQ: What are the most visited pages on this website and how many visits do they get?
Several years ago, I wrote an article on how to write different types of magic uses, or rather how I personally write various types of magic users within the context of my Quaraun books. Today that page is one of my top ten most visited articles. It gets 50 to 500 views/reads/hits/visits per day depending on the time of the years and has had over 200k visits total since it was published.
Amphibious Aliens: Debunking The Atwater Family's Alien Abduction Hoax with more then 30MILLION reads since 2007 and The GoldenEagle: Debunking Stephen King's World's Most Haunted Car Hoax with over tenMILLION reads since 2007 still rank as the two most visited articles on my website, but, neither of those are writing related.
Writing Medieval Servants is my most visited writing related article with over 7MILLION reads.
This website was started in 1996 and has 1 to 3 new articles (all written by me, I am the only writer on this site) published almost daily. In 2017 we crossed ten thousand articles published. As of 2023, EACH article gets MINIMUM 10 to 70 reads PER DAY, with the high traffic articles getting 500+ reads per day.
And since December 2019, my website now gets three hundred thousand to 7 million reads per month - well over ONE HUNDRED MILLION PAGE READS PER YEAR, making it not only the single most trafficked site in the State of Maine, but also one of the most visited websites in ALL OF NEW ENGLAND!
{{{HUGS}}} Thank you to all my readers for making this possible!
The Summoner of Darkness:
The Return of ZooLock
(yaoi free to read online)
Author of Cozy & Gothic Fantasy, Sweet/Fluffy M/M Furry Romance, Cosmic Horror, Space Opera, & Literary SoL genres. I write Elves, Fae, Unicorns, & Demons.
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The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane
Volume 11 of 130
The Summoner of Darkness:
Chapter 7
The Return of ZooLock
(yaoi free to read online)
Please Note: The Quaraun Series Is Rated M18+ and you must be 18 or older to buy it.
Most pages on EelKat.com are about writing Yaoi, and thus probably is NSFW; reader discretion is advised.
Why is the Quaraun Series Rated M18+?
The Summoner of Darkness is
an Epic Length Novel of more than 300,000 words
(500+ paperback pages)
This chapter is...
Word count: 4,249
or
13 paperback pages.
The Space Dock 13 WebRing
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Whatever you do, be your best at it!
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~EK
EelKat.com
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If you ever made fun of or had any part in the destruction of my farm, and the illegal selling of half of my land to Colliard, you shall lose your land.
If you ever made fun of or had any part in my being homeless since 2006 - YES, I AM still homeless in 2023, you shall become homeless.
If you ever made fun of or had any part in the backhoe driving over my house, you shall lose your house.
If you ever made fun of or had any part in my car being cut in half, you shall lose your car.
If you ever made fun of or had any part in my becoming crippled, you shall lose your health.
If you ever made fun of or had any part in the murder of my son, your child shall die an equally horrible death. If you haven't got a child to lose, it will be a brother or sister or parents or spouse or whomever you love the most, and that you should know it was this curse which you brought upon yourself that killed them, they will die on exactly the 7 year anniversary of the very first time, you mocked the death of my child.Evil men go out of their way to try to drive a person to suicide.
Are you an evil man?
Are you sure you're not?
How many people have YOUR hate filled words killed?
Next time you go to do a mean thing to a fellow human, stop and really think about the consequences of your actions.
Did you ever notice how every one has a story to tell about me, yet not one of them ever speaks the truth?
What lies has YOUR gossiping tongue spread about me?
Did you know...
October 16, 2006, bomb blew up my house because of YOUR lies.
August 8, 2013, the house which replaced the one the bomb blew up, was driven over by a backhoe.
November 14, 2013, my 8 month old infant son was murdered because of your lies.
November 14, 2013, I was beaten up, paralized for 5 months, spent 18 weeks relearning to walk, I'm now crippled for the rest of my life, because of YOUR lies.
Are you proud of what you have done?
Enjoy your eternity in Hell. You earned it. You've certainly worked hard for it.
~EelKat
If you have any information about any of these events, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322
The Summoner of Darkness:
The Return of ZooLock
(yaoi free to read online)
<<< Previous Chapter: HellBorne and The Missing Sacrificial Sheep
~o0o~ Chapter 7 ~o0o~
"Will you stop touching me!" Quaraun yelled at Unicorn.
"No. I refuses to."
Quaraun had just finished brushing his twelve foot long hair, an endeavour that took several hours, and was attempting to fold and pin it back up into the more manageable four foot length style he usually kept it in.
Unicorn, a little black furred trickster Faerie pony with a gleaming silver horn on his head, had decided it would be great fun to mess the Elf's hair back up. He had run up behind the Elf and twirled Quaraun's Rapunzel locks around his horn, but when he tried to run off afterwards, somehow got his horn stuck in Quaraun's impossibly long hair, which Quaraun was now trying to untangle.
“I canna move,” Unicorn whimpered mournfully, now regretting having messed with the Elf's hair.
“You shouldn't have stuck your horn in my hair.”
Unicorn shook his dreadlocked mane, trying to get his horn out of Quaraun's hair, but just made the tangled mess worse.
“Stop moving,” Quaraun snarled.
“Just grab some scissors and cut it.”
“I'm not cutting my hair! My father cut my hair. I'm never cutting my hair again.”
“Ya Daddy issues is becoming problem.”
“Shut up.”
“What ya gonna do in a few years when ya needs servants to carry ya hair?”
“It won't get that long.”
“No? It already long enough that ya always tripping on it. And ya canna sit down any more without making a fuss over where to puts ya hair otherwise ya can'na move iffy ya sits on it.”
Quaraun's pink pupiled blue eyes flashed with anger, as he continued, now silently to unwrap his hair from the pony's spiralled horn.
“Ya too easy for enemies to catch now. Ya wants to run away, all dey has to do is grab ya hair un then ya canna move.”
“I'm not cutting my hair.”
“Ya does nae have to cut it short. Just cut two or t'ree feet off of it.”
Unicorn wiggled again.
“Stop moving. You're making it worse.”
“Dis were bad idea.”
“Obviously.”
“Why did I do dis?”
“Because you're a nut.”
“I wants to run free. Galloping through the fields,” Unicorn moaned sadly.
“You could be if you hadn't been trying to annoy me.”
“It fun to annoys ya. Makes me horny unicorny.”
“Stop moving.”
“I can nots.”
"Stop it!"
"No."
"I'm gonna push you off a cliff," the pink Necromancer snarled.
"Oooooooooh!" the undead pony whinnied excitedly. "Go ahead. I ain't died by cliff death yet. Might be fun to die cliff death. Shatter me guts all over de rocks, let the birds feast on me entrails. Heck, let me know the next cliff ya sees un I'll save ya the trouble un go jump off it meself. Goody, goody, goody, goody. A new way to die!"
Quaraun glared at the Unicorn, who right now was purple and had a mouthful of Quaraun's long white hair gripped firmly in his teeth, chewing on it as though it were hay.
It had been a few hours since their hair entanglement debacle and Quaraun and Unicorn had now continued onward for another couple of miles before Quaraun decided he was completely and thoroughly lost. He stopped to sit on a log and looked at his map.
The map was a blank scroll, which drew itself every time you looked at it. No matter where you were, it drew a map of the area. If you were in a new town, it drew all the streets for you.
With the Elf Eater's enchanted map, one could never get lost.
King Gwallmattic, Elf Eater of Pepper Valley, had been the world's most powerful wizard for most of the 2,000 years of his life. But he could not read or write and so his spell scrolls were drawn out in pictures and symbols, which he understood, but no other wizard could decypher. Like every other spell he had written, his map looked like it had been drawn by a 2 year old.
When a non-wizard looked at the map, all they saw was a row of purple stick figure puppies, scribbled out trees, a house, and a great big red X in the middle. Like a child's treasure map to no where, it looked like it was not a real map at all.
However, in the hands of a wizard, the crayon drawing came to 3-D life and began running across the page, rearranging themselves to match the area around the wizard holding it.
Quaraun looked at the map. Right now, purple cartoon stick puppies drawn in crayon were dancing around the edges yipping excitedly, wagging their tails, happy to see him looking at them. Blinking arrows were pointing in every direction, each one yelling at him:
“Pick me!” screaming one puppy. "I know where to go!"
“No! Not him. I'm knowing a better place! Pick me!”
“Look at me, I'm not purple. I'm pink. Pick me.”
It was an enchanted map. It had been created by an insane wizard. A purple unicorn, who didn't know how to read or write and draw everything in purple crayons. A purple unicorn that right now, was chewing on his hair and burping loudly. The pony suddenly pricked up his fuzzy ears, and then galloped madly into the field, to trample a nodding daisy.
Quaraun turned the map around several times, trying to figure out which way was up and which way was down. Where North was, and which road on the map, was the road he was standing on. It never told him any information he wanted to know. He didn't know why he kept expecting it to tell him anything useful.
The tiny purple unicorn was galloping though a nearby field chasing butterflies and eating them. When he got bored with that he skewered several butterflies on his horn and trotted back to sit beside the old Elf.
Quaraun looked over at Unicorn.
"Why are their butterflies on your horn?"
"Why not?"
Quaraun shook his head and went back to staring at the map.
"Ya put ribbons in yar hair. I put butterflies on me horn."
Unicorned turned back into his Human form and ran screaming into the forest on the other side of the road. Quaraun looked up and watched him. A few minutes later he came screaming back and sat down beside the wizard. Quaraun continued to stare at him.
"What?" Unicorn asked.
"What the hell is wrong with you?"
"I is be restless."
"I can see that. Why are you running around screaming?"
"I had to get it out of me system."
"Do all Faeries act like you?"
"Aye."
Quaraun shook his head and went back to trying to translate the Elf eater's enchanted map.
Unicorn came up behind the Elf and read the map over his shoulder. Unicorn couldn't read or write. When he wanted to write spells on scrolls his did so with crayons and drawings of stick figures. Though extremely effective in the hands of any one who could read his childish scribbles, his spell scrolls were nearly impossible for other wizards to interpret and cast.
"Is we dair yet?" Unicorn asked.
"No."
"How come for."
"Because I don't know."
“Why not?”
“I don't know. How many times do I have to say it?”
"Where is we be off to?"
"I don't know."
"Why does ya no know?"
"Unicorn."
"What?"
"Stop."
"Why?"
"I can't concentrate."
"Why?"
"Because you won't shut up."
"Why?"
"How the hell should I know why you won't stop?"
"What fot I needing shut up?"
“Because I'm trying to think.”
“About what?”
“About where we are. And where we are supposed to be. And why we are not there. And why are there purple puppies running back and forth across the map so I can't see what the map says?”
“Is we lost?”
“Yes.”
“Does ya even know where we is going to?”
“No, I don't know where we're going.”
“Will ya knows where we is going after we gets there?”
“No.”
“Does ya knows when we will be getting to this place ya does nae knows we going to?”
“No, I don't know when we'll get there. Because I don't know where we are going, this damn map won't tell me a damned thing."
"Then why are we going anywhere?"
"Because the pumpkins told me to."
"What pumpkins?"
"The ones we meet last night."
"We meet pumpkins last night?"
"Yes."
"Canst thou wit what the day shall bring. "
“What?
“Ya is talking to pumpkins?”
“Yes.”
“Me Necromancer, high on all that poppy milk we harvested earlier, is now talking to de pumpkins dat ain't no there.“
"I am not high on poppies."
"No?"
"No. Not right now."
"Meaning ya twere last night un ya will be again later."
"Unicorn. Please. Stop. You're being as annoying as a Golden Retriever."
There was a poof of purple smoke and suddenly a purple Golden Retriever was running circles around Quaraun, yipping excitedly.
Quaraun sighed and leaned forward resting his head on his arms, crossed on his lap.
“Why me?” he moaned. “The things poppies show me aren't half as strange as the things you do.”
Unicorn didn't answer. His was too busy getting dizzy, running in circled with his tail in his mouth.
"UNICORN! STOP IT!"
The Phooka turned back into his Human form and sa down beside the Elf. Quaraun went back to trying to translate what the map was telling him. Unicorn started poking the Elf's 12 inch long pointed ear.
“Stop it,” Quaraun said swatting the Faerie's hand away.
Unicorn poked him again.
“I said stop it.”
Unicorn poked him again. This time Quaraun swung around and punched him. The Faerie fell off the log, turned back into a purple puppy and began bouncing and barking excitedly.
“STOOOOP!” Quaraun screamed.
Seeing that he was risking pushing the wizard's temper too far, Unicorn turned back into his Humanoid form and sat quietly on the ground in front of the Necromancer. He was too fidgety to sit for more then a few seconds.
"I is bored."
"I can see that!"
"Need boredom to end."
"So turning into a dog and chasing your tail is gonna help?"
"Aye."
"Why don't you do something useful?"
"Like what?"
"Like teaching me how to translate this damn map."
"There is no t'ing to translate. Map take ya where evers ya need be."
"Right now all it's doing is pointing at you."
"Aye. It lead Elves to me sos I can eat dem."
"Is this thing taking us back t the Screaming Unicorn?"
Unicorn looked around.
"Look that way?"
"Do you know where we are?"
"Nope. But dis definitely coast road I been being on before. I think we is few days from me inn. Week from here. Maybes two."
"So it's taking you home?"
"Aye."
"Is that where it's supposed to take us?"
Unicorn shrugged.
"It take us where ever it is we does need being. If we need place to sleep, it show us place to set up camp or tavern for night or whatever is near by."
"I know that's what it is supposed to do. That's why I can't figure out why it lead us here. There's nothing here. You got an open field over there and dense forest over there, and a decimated town over there. None of them safe places to set up camp for the night."
"So why we stop here?"
"Because the map stopped here."
Quaraun held up the map.
"Look! There's nothing else on it. All it is showing me now is that city right there, that isn't there anymore."
Unicorn looked at the razed town ahead of them.
"It not been razed lang. Still smell smoke. Happen only week gone by."
"Which means there is a Human army within a week of here, meaning this is not a safe area, meaning this map is not working."
"Maybe map say we supposed to spend night in ruins?"
"Spend a night in ruins?"
"Aye."
"Let's keep walking," Quaraun said as he stood up, and went back to the road.
Unicorn followed him.
"Why for not stay in ruins?"
"Fresh ruins. With soot and ash..."
"Aye. Me forgetsing, me Elf can'na get dust on him perfectly pristine self."
“Why did you make this map?”
“Sos I never gets lost.”
“It never tells us anything useful.”
“Than why ya uses it?”
“I don't know, I...” Quaraun suddenly stopped walking.
Unicorn slammed into him.
"I wish ya would no stops like dat. Give me some warning before ya does dat."
"I heard something," Quaraun said nervously.
The Elf's eyes grew wide with fear, his long pointed ears pricked high and alert.
"Ya always hearing t'ings. Ya can hear a mile away wid those rabbit ears o'yars."
"No. I heard something."
"Dair ain't no t'ing out dair."
"There's always something out there."
"Aye. Frogs in trees. Birds in water. Fish in sky. Dair always be t'ings out dair. We does no have to panic over every one of dem, eh?"
"Yes we do."
"No we do'na."
"There's dangers around every corner."
"Aye. Un scared rabbity eared Elves waiting to runs from every one of dems."
Quaraun's long ears laid back fearfully.
"What was that?" He whispered.
"What were what?"
"Shut up."
Quaraun clamped his hand over Unicorn's mouth and perked up his long pointed ears to listen.
"I heard something."
Quaraun climbed up onto a log and continued to listen. His thin, pointed foot long ears twitched, nervously causing the chains connected back to his nose to shake and tinkle.
"Someone's hurt."
"Eh?"
"That way."
Quaraun pointed, then ran off in the direction he had pointed to. Unicorn turned into a tiny black Shetland pony with a silver horn and galloped along behind the Moon Elf. They soon came upon the city ruins.
The razed village was not as big as it had appeared from the hill. It was only a small village that had been built on top of ancient ruins. Trees had grown over the crumbled walls of buildings fallen over decades ago. There appeared to be no sign of life anywhere.
Quaraun stopped and listened again.
"I don't hear it any more," he said. "I was certain I heard someone, but now I hear nothing."
Unicorn transformed back into his Human form and sniffed the air. Faeries had keen sense of smell, especially when it came to sniffing out blood. He could smell fresh blood near by.
"Over dair," Unicorn said, pointing to a pile of rubble, freshly tumbled over. "It a Thullid."
"A Thullid?" Quaraun stopped. "Out here?"
Quaraun cautiously moved forward. Thullids were not to be trusted. They were dangerous. He saw something laying in the rubble. As he approached he could see that it was indeed a Thullid. The squid headed beast was old, it's purple tentacles faded to a dull, dusty mauve. It wore the robes of a DiJinn priest with a distinct pink and orange swirling pattern. The purple tentacle beast was trapped beneath a stone wall that had fallen on top of it. The elderly squid was too weak to lift the stones off himself.
"Can I eat it?" Unicorn asked.
"No."
Quaraun approached the wounded Thullid.
"Are you alright?"
In case you didn't know, I'm a costume designer with a degree in theatrical dressmaking and fashion design. As such, the costumes you see me making for my CosPlays of the Quaraun series characters are fully designed from the ground up by me. Meaning, not only do I design and make the patterns, but I also design and have custom made fabrics.
Below is the fabric I designed for CosPlaying ZooLock...
"They abandoned me," the Thullid whimpered, not opening his eyes. He was a Demon in a world that was quick to slaughter Demons and he was at the mercy of whomever had just found him and so he hoped his death would be quick and painless.
"Who did?"
"My people. We were on our way to meet the Summoner and stopped here to rest among the ruins until it was safe to travel at nightfall again. But alas this wall fell on me just before we set out the travel again, and they just left me here to die. I am too old. Too weak. Too unimportant. Now I will never lay eyes on my Lady again. Kill me quickly that I may swim in the oceans of the eternities."
"Hmmmm, a very Thullid thing to do," Quaraun said as he began rummaging through his tiny, pink, beaded, heart shaped bag of holding, which was far bigger on the inside.
"Whatch ya looking for?" Unicorn asked.
"Chains."
"Chains?"
“Yes.”
“Why?”
"We're taking him with us," Quaraun said.
"We is?" Unicorn asked.
"You are?" The Thullid asked, opening his large squid eyes and looking up at the Elf for the first time.
"YOU!" The Thullid gasped.
"Hello, ZooLock," Quaraun said as he pulled iron shackles and chains from his bag.
The Thullid suddenly began to flail and thrash and try desperately to escape, but the wall remained firmly on top of him. Quaraun clamped the shackles on ZooLock's arms.
"Lift the wall off him," Quaraun said to Unicorn.
Unicorn did as he was asked, while Quaraun locked the remaining shackles on the Thullid's legs.
“Oh saints be praised! Glixtiill shines blessing upon me!”
One of the many pink fabrics I designed for Quaraun...
"That's greeeaat. Just wonderful. Exactly what I didn't want to hear. Can you stand on your own?" Quaraun asked the old squid headed alien.
ZooLock attempted to stand and found he was only mildly bruised.
"Yes, I can walk," he said cheerfully. "I no longer need your help, my blessed saviour."
"I'm not here to help you, ZooLock."
"Oh. No! Of course not. One as great as you has many more important things to do then rescue a lowly priest as me."
ZooLock fell face first to the ground and began kissing the Elf's pink satin shoes.
“I brother.” Quaraun shook his head. "I'd forgotten how annoying ZooLock could be."
“By the glories of Xillithual, we are reunited at last!”
Quaraun turned and walked out of the ruins, not giving the Thullid time to stand up, and so instead dragged him on the ground. Unicorn watched as the Elf, normally a dainty, delicate creature who never hurt anyone, bruscky dragged the Thullid making sure to hit him on every rock he could.
"Me t'inks one does not like de Thullid," Unicorn said wehen he caught up to Quaraun.
"Really, how could you tell?"
"Ya knows him than?"
Quaraun stopped walking.
"ZooLock, this is King Gwallmaiic, the Elf Eater of Pepper Valley, otherwise known as BoomFuzzy the Unicorn. Unicorn, meet ZooLock. Last of the Di'Jinn priests, and my prison guard for some thousand or so years. He kept me imprisoned in a glass goldfish bowl."
The fabric I designed for Unicorn's Kimono and Hakama...
"Ah! Dat would be de Jelly Fish talking, yes?"
"Yes."
Quaraun continued on. He walked back to the road, dragging ZooLock along behind him. The old Thullid didn't seem to mind and allowed himself to be dragged through the mud as he continued his outbursts of praises to various Demonic deities.
“So, I take it ya knows him?” Unicorn asked.
“Yes. Unfortunately. And he's a raving lunatic.”
“Why would him no be? Every one else ya knows is.”
"I never thanked you for the map, ZooLock."
"You are most welcome..."
Quaraun glared at the squid beast, who was laying face down on the ground, being dragged along behind the Elf with no complaint.
“ZooLock...”
“Yes?” The squid looked up at the Elf's angry eyes. "Oh... you were being sarcastic. My apologies my Lady. Has the a whip that I might lash myself for my indiscretions?"
"This is map guy?" Unicorn asked.
"Yes. Unicorn. This is ZooLock. The lunatic that sold me the map. This map!"
Quaraun waved the map in the air.
"This damned map! ZooLock, meet Unicorn. The lunatic who made the map."
"He is a Phooka," ZooLock replied.
"He is King Gwallmaiic."
"The Elf Eater of Pepper Valley?!"
"The same."
"Then you found him!"
"Obviously."
“Oh glorious days! Love blooms again. My lord has found his long lost love. I shall toss a dozen babies into the pits of Fire Mountain in celebration of this glorious day.”
“You'll do no such thing!” Quaraun yelled.
The Elf stomped angrily down the road, once again dragging the Thullid priest behind him, who continued to make no attempt at standing up and walking.
“I am so fed up with these psychopathic cultists worshipping me,” Quaraun grumbled as he walked. “It is so frustratingly annoying that everywhere I turn, there's another group of lunatics sacrificing innocents in my name. What do they think I am? I'm just an Elf. What is wrong with these people. Now they are sacrificing babies to volcanoes in my name? What next? What next!"
"You do approve of sacrificing babies to you?"
"You dare sacrifice a baby in my name, I won't just feed you to my Unicorn, I'll eat you myself!"
"Ah! Very good. I shall make note of this. No more sacrificing of babies in Her Ladyship's holy name."
"Why do you insist on worshiping me?"
"You are the Sacred Pink Jelly Fiish."
"I was before you stuffed me inside of this damned Elf!"
"Is the Moon Elf's body not to your liking? We can move you to another body more to your liking."
"No. I like this, Elf. But I would rather have been set free to live the ocean again instead."
"Sadly that is not possible, my Lady. As you well know the oceans of this planet are poison to you. I tried to put you in the ocean? Do you not remember? It burned your jelly flesh. You were so badly damaged. I no choice but to implant you immediately to save your life. The soft flesh of the Elf's brain healed you and kept you alive and now you have his body. You are no longer traped in a bowl. Now you can walk any where you please."
"Un walk him does," Unicorn said. "We walks all way from one side of planet to ot'er. Up coast. Down coast. Is dat why him walking so much? Make up for so many much years of no freedom to move?"
"I hate, having these damned cultists around," Quaraun said.
"Then why have you put me in chains?"ZooLock asked.
Quaraun stopped walking and turned to glare down at the old squid headed priest.
"You imprisoned me in this Elf. And get up you idiot. Stop making me drag you. You have feet, you can walk.”
“Yes my Lord.”
“Stop calling me that!”
“Yes my Ladyship.”
“Stop it!”
Unicorn giggled.
“Don't you dare start,” Quaraun snarled at Unicorn.
“I said nothing.”
“I shall build altars at every town we pass...” ZooLock started to say.
“Don't you dare!”
Quaraun turned from ZooLock, pricking his ears up once again, listening.
"Ya hears somet'ing again," Unicorn stated.
Quaraun scanned the area but saw nothing.
"I feel like someone's following us."
"Does ya?"
"I heard that sound before, back on the road."
"What sound?"
"Wings flapping."
"Dat would be de birds, Quaraun. We out in wild nature. Dair be birdypoos every which way."
"It's not a bird."
"How ya know that?"
"I know the sound of birds and this doesn't sound like a bird."
"What it sound like?"
"I don't know. Not a bird. It's been following us for a few days now. It keeps it's distance. But it got close this time."
"Yis certain we is being followed?"
Unicorn looked around. Not that he could see any thing. He was almost blind and could barely see a foot in front of his nose.
"Yes."
"By a t'ing wid wings?"
"Yes."
"Ya sure it wings?"
"Demon wings."
"Demon wings?"
"Leathery fleshy wings without any feathers."
"Like a dragon?"
"Too small to be a dragon."
"A baby dragon?"
"Too stealthy to be an infant."
"So a Demon."
"With soft padded paws."
"Padded paws?"
"Like a rabbit."
"We is being followed by a Demon winged rabbit?"
"You know he's insane, right?" ZooLock asked Unicorn.
"Aye. un iffy yar is one what put Jelly in him head then yis one what did it to him."
"It doesn't hop like a rabbit," Quaraun continued.
"Does nae hop like a... Eh?"
"No. And it's definitely not a pumpkin."
"Eh? What? Pumpkin?"
"The pumpkins have been following us for a few days now."
"Have t'ey?"
"Yes."
"Quaraun? I trust ya rabbit ears to pick up every sound in the area, I just does nae trust ya conspiracy filled Jelly brain ta translate those sounds correctly."
A pair of blue eyes watched from the ruins as Quaraun shrugged and continued walking, his newly captured squid in tow and the little black unicorn prancing along behind. Purple wings fluttered, lifting white paws off the ground and to the trees.
<<< Previous Chapter: HellBorne and The Missing Sacrificial Sheep
Next Chapter: Highwaymen >>>
The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane
Volume 11 of 130
The Summoner of Darkness
Full Chapter Index -
About The Novel:
Volume 11: The Summoner of Darkness
Back from the dead, once again with Unicorn in tow, and now with the Thullid priest ZooLock his prisoner shackled in chains, Quaraun is headed back to The Screaming Unicorn Tavern in Old Orchard Beach, but finds himself cursed with endless bad luck, as one thing after another drops out of the sky in his path.
Highwaymen, hellhounds, a turtle as big as a house, fire breathing butterflies, a train station from the 20th century, and a strange glow-in-the-dark demonic wizard with pockets full of sheep, who sits in a red armchair in poppy field in the 1400s reading 1980s spellbooks books by Gary Gaygax.
Quaraun goes head to head against The Gremlin, a time traveling wizard from the future who refuses to allow the Pink Necromancer back into Old Orchard Beach, where since his last visit, an evil Sorcerer named HellBorne has erected a giant cursed lighthouse known as The Black Tower.
ZooLock however has other plans, and while 4 rival wizards tear up the town in a wizard's duel, the Squid Headed Aliens From Neptune's Moon and their armies of JellyFish worshiping cultists arrive in town to preform a ritual that will unleash an Elder Brain Chaos Demon, known as The Sacred Pink JellyFish on the world. Too bad they didn't know she was already in town.
NOTE: Most of this novel will be available as free to read online.
Please Note: The Quaraun Series Is Rated M18+ and you must be 18 or older to buy it.
Most pages on EelKat.com are about writing Yaoi, and thus probably is NSFW; reader discretion is advised.
Why is the Quaraun Series Rated M18+?
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Quaraun is a character I play in Dungeons & Dragons. Like most every other novel in the series, this novel is based off the notes taken from an actual game play session. The Summoner of Darkness is based off the Dungeons & Dragons Campaign: The Murder of the Seven Points by Erik Yaple. If you are a Dungeon Master interested in running a game using this story, the game guide used is this one here --->>> |
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List Of Sample Chapters
Available To Read Online:
The Cultists and The Coming of The Darkness
EelKat and The Kats of Planet Ptarmagin
A Letter To Home
HellBorne and The Missing Sacrificial Sheep
Highwaymen
Another Letter To Home
Hellhounds
The Half-Elf Thief With Pockets Full of Sheep
"I am Very Concerned About Blueberries." - Back At The Blueberry Plains of The Screaming Unicorn Inn
A Field of Fire Breathing Butterflies
A Field of Poppies On The Road To Witch Pond
The Road To Witch Pond (Part 2)
The Road To Witch Pond (Part 3)
The Pumpkins Are Following Us
A Third Letter To Home
The Abandoned Cathedral
A Piano Fell From The Sky
The Glow-In-The-Dark Sun Elf Who Fell From The Sky
GhoulSpawn and Quaraun Trapped With A Phooka
Night Terrors
"Him not hurt. Him just cry baby."
The Pregnant Jelly Fish
The Banshee Sisters: Bean-Nighe and Ben-Neeyah In the Swamp of Death
A Fourth Letter To Home - The Masochistic Elf With Stockholm Syndrome
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Stay Wid Us Too Lang, Ya Go Crazy Wid Us The Black Lighthouse Strange Nightmares Pumpkins Again |
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The Strange Village or I Love The Smell Of Decomposing Bodies In The Morning
Food Fight In a Funeral Home
Shrimp Dinners
Corsets, Elves, and Undead Faeries.
Visiting The Scene of Murder #1 With An UnGelded Stallion
The Sixth Letter To Home
The Fetishes of Phookas
Back At The Tavern and Still No Shrimp
A Tavern Scene Part 1 - "Ever heard of a chastity cage?"
A Tavern Scene Part 2 - Drunk Elves, Shrimp Dinners, and Dungeon Masters From The Future
A Tavern Scene Part 3 - Quaraun, Unicorn, GhoulSpawn, - Time Travel, Chastity Cages, and Whores
He Kills People With Candy (The 7th Letter To Home)
ZooLock Again - Off To Talk to Merchants About Murder #2
Three Days, Three Murders, & Still No Shrimp Dinners
Tumbling Down Stairs With Slutty Elves and Angry Liches
The Missing Children Bean-Nighe and Ben-Neeyah Warned Of
Explosions From The Sea
A Hurricane Hits The Lighthouse
The Blind Phooka
You Always See The Pony?
Murder #4 & Questions About The Black Tower
Pumpkins, Blueberries, and Shrimp
The Thullids Arrive In Town
Investigating Murder #5
ZooLock's Thullid Cultists
Where Are You Hiding That Horse?
Murder #6 - The Red Herring Murder
Murder #6 - The Real Murder
The First Try At Entering Black Tower
The Black Tower's Garden of Death
The Hostess Twinkie Aisle of Biddeford Wal-Mart
Elves In Chandeliers
Aardsvorkus Muddsburge & The Crystal cave of Time and Necromancy
The Train Station
Back At The Tavern
Mallac and The Murder Weapon
Mallac And The Shambling Dead - No Spell Is Ever without A Price
Why is there an elephant in my bed?
"Kcuf! Kcuf! Kcuf! Kcuf! Kcuf! Kcid a kcus! Kcuf!"
Another Night, Another Murder (Murder #7)
HellBorne The Evil, Lord of Black Tower
Elwin
"My first thought was, where would a three year old put your bag of holding?"
The Oozing Plate Of Sugar Cookies Bludgeoned By The Courageous Alien Being Chased By A Bloodthirsty Crazed Celebrity Chef
Elwin and The Town Full of Dead Children
Glimmer Monks wear nothing underneath their robes...
Can Unicorns conceal themselves amongst normal horses and pick them off in secret?
The Thullids Are Gathering Around The Golden Rooster
A Bag Full of Pickled Jellyfish
Back At Black Tower
The Bottomless Pit
I'm HellBorne The Evil, Lord of Black Tower, of The Castle of Blood and Death
Necromancers Don't Wear Pink
BoomFuzzy's Evil Army of Blood Thirsty Marshmallow Tutti-Frutti Fuzzy Wuzzy Fluffy Bunnies
The Cult of The Sacred Pink Jelly Fish
The Pregnant Jellyfish and The Murdered Half-Elf
The Wrath of The Pink Necromancer
Darkness Falls
Back To Black Tower Again
The Ptarmagin Kats of Space Dock 13
On Board The VISION-D8
Elwin Again (The End?)
Did You Know?
The Summoner of Darkness is the first time The Gremlin, EelKat, Lyxiana, Bela, and Spriggan (all characters from the original 1978 edition of Friends Are Forever, Volume 1 of The Twighlight Manor Series) make appearances in The Quaraun series.
While most of the Quaraun series is written with Quaraun as the only point of view character, EelKat, the primary point of view character of the Twighlight Manor series, alternates with Quaraun as a point of view character in Summoner of Darkness.
The novel tells 2 stories side by side, with all odd numbered chapters telling Quaraun's version of the story in the 1400s, and all even numbered chapters being written as letters from EelKat in the 1980s to her sister Lynxian.
EelKat is a 4th wall meta breaking narrator.
Answering Reader Questions:
GhoulSpawn's Sheep Explained
A staple in every story that features GhoulSpawn, is his glittering technicolour herd of sheep, that gather around him to listen as he reads Dungeon's & Dragons manuals, while sitting in a red armchair, in the middle of some field.
I own the red chair, btw, which you see me sitting in in my BookTube videos while I read. You can see it in this video here:
The 2 most common reader questions asked about GhoulSpawn are:
- What the hell is it with the sheep? They don't serve any plot point and seem to be there for no reason at all. What the hell?
- Does GhoulSpawn have sex with his sheep or not?
The first story to feature Gremlin as a main character was The Wild Years, published in 1987. In this story he is a member of PETA on a mission to shut down Procter & Gamble, after encountering a local sheep farm that supplies lambs for Iams dogfood. In the slaughterhouse on the farm is a conveyor belt, onto which baby lambs are herded, then dropped into a grinder where they are chopped up while still alive.
If you have a stomach strong enough to view such things, you can see BOTH the Proctor & Gamble animal by-product grinder and McDonald's hamburger making grinder in this video here, which shows it being used on baby chickens and baby cows.
(The chicken grinder shown in this video is P&G's Iams dog food processing plant and the cow grinder seen here are Mcdonald's hamburgers be made for you.)
Please be warned, this anti-war, human rights, and animal rights protest video shows EXTREMELY GRAPHIC real life footage of poachers, slaughterhouses, human trafficing, KKK attacks, beheaded ISIS victims, and children killed by landmines.
VIEWER DISCRETION IS STRONGLY ADVISED!
Back to GhoulSpawn, the series' resident uber extreme animal rights activist...
This was a very real farm and a very real machine which I had seen when I was 8 years old, and was the reason I became an animal rights activist and a vegetarian. This aspect of GhoulSpawn's character, his being a vegan animal rights activist with a vendetta against P&G is based off my own life. (If you did not know, I am the founder of the real world Procter & Gamble Boycott and many of the Twighlight Manor books were written specifically for the boycott, thus why a character like The Gremlin took centre stage.)
Readers came to know that if Gremlin was in the story, so too would be references to the evils of Procter & Gamble, Iams dogfood's horrific sheep grinding machine, and mysterious disappearing sheep, along with his random ramblings against McDonald's, Burger King, and other giants in the animal abuse industry.
Unfortunately for GhoulSpawn, he's often rambling on deaf ears, as Quaraun, Unicorn, and others from the 1400s, have no way to comprehend the future atrocities being described by the time traveller. The reactions of people from the 1400s varies from thinking GhoulSpawn is a raving lunatic (thus why he is dubbed "GhoulSpawn the Crazed") to people understanding that he has seen something which has horribly upset him and feeling pity for him, but not really being able to understand exactly what he is talking about.
And then, when he can't get people to listen to him, he starts pulling sheep out of his pockets, not realizing that back in the 1400s he's surrounded by superstitious people who view magic, Wizards, and such things as evil sorcery and people practicing them as witches to be burned and destroyed. As a teenager from the 1970s, GhoulSpawn has as much trouble comprehending the 1400s mind as they have comprehending him.
As no one but GhoulSpawn can get anything out of or even see anything in his pockets, he can safely stuff sheep in his pockets and then innocently stand there while people run around like mad trying to figure out where all the sheep are disappearing to. He'll stuff another sheep in his pockets every time no one is looking and will continue to do this until the entire herd is gone/in his pockets. At which point he'll then jump back in his 1974 AMC Gremlin, fly back to the 1400s and set the sheep loose in green pastures.
GhoulSpawn has a particular affinity for Cotswold sheep, and his habit of stealing/rescuing sheep and taking them to the past, is used as an explanation for why Cotswolds were so very overpopulated in Medieval times, yet today are considered an endangered species.
Over the years it became a running gag in the series for other characters to bully and tease Gremlin claiming he had a sex fetish for sheep. However, GhoulSpawn does not have sex with his sheep and often seen deeply upset over the accusation. Because most people in the 1400s do not believe GhoulSpawn is a time traveller from the future, they say that he made up his story of rescuing sheep from "the gambler" to cover up habits of beasillity. Quaraun and Unicorn remain two of the only people to believe GhoulSpawn's story as he has taken them to the future and they have seen the things he speaks of for themselves.
The reason for GhoulSpawn's obsession with sheep, is a secret he rarely reveals and is known only to his closet friends: while the series often bills him as a half-Elf, leaving people to assume in also half-Human, is is rather instead half-Demon, specifically he is an Uruisg, which is a Scottish Sheep Demon, a man with the upper body of a man and the lower body of a Cotswold sheep.
In keeping with the actual Irish, Welsh, and Scottish folklore about Uruisg, GhoulSpawn is somewhat of a trickster and causes chaos to ensure whenever he is around. Also like the actual folklore he is a notorious thief and pickpocket, compulsively unable to control his urge to simply pick up and take every shiny object he sees.
Who Is GhoulSpawn?
This is the first time GhoulSpawn appears using the name GhoulSpawn. In previous volumes he was using the name Glinta instead.
In the Twighlight Manor series he is known as The Gremlin.
Quaraun's teenaged lover GhoulSpawn is a "natural born" Sorcerer. He is a half-Elf/half Demon.
GhoulSpawn's father was an evil Demon who commanded an army of Ghouls. Because of this, he was known simply as "The Ghoul".
GhoulSpawn's mother was a Sun Elf whom had fallen in love with The Ghoul, but was forbidden by her family to have contact with him. She in turn ran away with her Demon lover, thus causing a war between Elves and Demons.
The Sun Elves tell a story of how their Princess was kidnapped and raped by the Ghoul, thus she gave birth to the Spawn of the Ghoul. Though his mother named him Glinta, she died while he was still very young, and his Elven kin, took to calling him GhoulSpawn as a way to brand him not one of them.
GhoulSpawn is an interdimensional time traveller, because he is unable to remain in any one time, place or dimension long, because he was born in the Hell Dimension, which exists outside of the realm of time and space as we know it. The Ghoul tried to escape the Sun Elves by going to the distant future (1974) and leaving his half-Elf son and the boy's mother there to live among a band of LSD addicted hippie Humans whom drove a 1974 AMC Gremlin.
The Sun-Elves eventually found their missing she-Elf and brought her back to the 1400s where she belonged, but she refused to leave her half-Demon son behind.
After his mother's death, GhoulSpawn was made a servant to his High Elf step-father and full blooded Elf step siblings, all of whom abused him and treated him like a slave. He grew up constantly being told he, because he was only a half-Elf, was unloved and unwanted and should have been killed at birth, resulting in the very low self esteem he has.
Neither Demons nor half-Elves are considered welcomed members of society, both being forced to live in small tribal groups on the outskirts of civilization. Both are often stoned to death or hung if they dare set foot in a city.
GhoulSpawn being both a Demon and a half-Elf is doubly mistreated by the majority of the world's population. He takes to travelling with Quaraun because Quaraun simply accepts GhoulSpawn as he is and is not bothered by being seen in the company of either a Demon or a half-Elf.
There are several instances when people try to bully GhoulSpawn and Quaraun (a high ranking full-blooded aristocratic High Elf) is quick to stand up for him, protecting and defending the half-Elf. Quaraun is often classified by other Elves as "insane" simply because he is willing to be friends with a half-Elf.
GhoulSpawn has a speech impediment which lessens when he is relaxed and grows worse the more nervous or frightened he becomes.
Around calm laid back characters like Quaraun, GhoulSpawn speaks without difficulty. However around domineering, headstrong, or bullying characters such as Unicorn or HellBorne, GhoulSpawn develops a stutter, making it difficult for him the get to the end of a sentence.
Because he is a Demon, GhoulSpawn was born with natural magical abilities, making him a rare "natural born wizard" or sorcerer.
GhoulSpawn is typical of a Sorcerer in the Quaraun series, in that he has Demon blood, was thus born with a Demon's natural ability to cast magic on some levels, has taking to self-teaching himself how to control the magic powers he was born with, is outcast from society because of his link to Demons, and is generally not well thought of, even though he is not in any way evil, and is in fact the only part of the cast who could be considered anything close to being a Hero.
Being a time traveller, there are times when Quaraun encounteres both GhoulSpawn and his future counterpart Gremlin in the same novel.
This is the first novel in the series to feature multiple versions of GhoulSpawn in a single novel.
GhoulSpawn remains one of the most hated and most loved characters in the series. People who dislike him, absolutely despise him and have gone so far as to request I remove his character from the series entirely. While people who love him, often cite him as their favourite character and often request I add him into more stories more often.
For the people who don't like him, I'm sorry, but he remains one of my favourite characters of the series and he's not going anywhere.
For the people who want to see more of him: there are plans to make changes to several stories in the series to include him in the future editions, more often.
You can find out more about GhoulSpawn here:
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Did You Know:
Summoner of Darkness
was written on location at the real Witch Pond?
Meet The Real Witch Hole Pond:
If You Want To Visit Witch Hole Pond For Yourself, Here Are The Directions To It:
(Address is: Witch Hole Pond, Carriage Road, Mt. Desert Island, Acadia National Park, Bar Harbour, Maine)
Interview With EelKat
While Walking On The Real Road To
Witch Hole Pond In Bar Harbour, Maine
A Real Turtle In Witch Hole Pond:
A Bald Eagle Bathing In Witch Hole Pond:
And the swamp just before the pond...
Driving Park Loop Road Around Witch Hole Pond...
And climbing Bubble Rock Mountain overlooking Witch Hole Pond...
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This novel was originally written in: 2014 - 2016
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