Happy 2026!
It is our 30th anniversary here at Space Dock 13!
On the web since 1996!
You have encountered an extremely old website that continues to exist in old web ways, the same way it has done for now three decades.
In spite of being now 30 years old this year, started in 1996, it is still heavily active and old pages updated daily, new pages added daily, still now in 2026. All hand written, all hand coded (no AI), all by me, same as it ever was.
We Still Exist: The Old Web Did Not Go Away, You Just Forgot How To Find Us
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This site was NOT designed for mobile devices (as they had not been invented yet when I created it) thus this site looks best on a computer, at 1280x768 or above. |
This is a very old website created in 1996, so, yes, javascript is needed for the site to work as it should. If things don't function, you may need to update javascript drivers on your device |
This site tries to be mobile friendly but it's been online since 1996, so old pages may not load right on mobile devices, and as this site has had pages added near daily for 30 years there are now over 20k pages here. |
Having started out in life as a GeoCities site, this site contains glitter, bright colours, blinkies, moving gifs, and other things the old web was known for. |
If you are an FBI agent or a police officer or a reporter looking for password/login access to the 10,000+ daily blog posts, photos, and video footage that detail all information about my son's murder and the harassment of my family: contact FBI Agent Andy Drewer for the original documents, files, and evidence, he will let you know what you can and can not have access to.
Once a signed and notarized letter handwritten by FBI Agent Andy Drewer has been given to you, and he has confirmed he gave it to you to give to me, and after which you give me said letter, I will give you the passwords to the pages, photos, and videos he says you are allowed to access.
Note that there are over TEN THOUSAND password protected blog posts, and over FIFTEEN THOUSAND password protected video files, and they EACH have a different password, so you will have to get a list of WHICH SPECIFIC pages and video footages the FBI has said you are allowed to have access to. I can not give you one, one-size-fits-all password.
And yes, you will have to do all of this face to face in person, as I do not have either a phone or email and there is no way for you to contact me other then directly offline.
Yes, I have a FB and Twitter. No, I do not answer DMs from those, and all messages sent that way are auto forwarded to FBI agent Andy Drewer UNREAD BY ME.
Yes, he monitors my FaceBook and Twitter, yes, if you have done ANYTHING with/to/at my FaceBook or Twitter since 2016, yes, the FBI DOES have copies of ALL you did - yes, even those reporting attacks October 2023 to December 2023 - YES, that DOES mean I know EXACTLY who did it.
YES, this website, my Reddit account, and ALL my social medias are on what conspiracy theorists call "an FBI watchlist" and YES, if you have interacted with ANY of them, you are far, far, arfromy sourdered and the FBI is ACTIVELY tracking EVERYTHING and EVERYONE who has contact with me in ANY MANNER, to trace any and all leads back to my son's murderer. No, VPNs do not hide you or your location, YES, I HAVE tracking cookies on this site that the FBI accesses,
YES, it HAS been noticed that whenever there is unusual visitor activity on my website, it is always the same zip code: 04064-1520 and it's often attempted to be hidden behind VPNs.
The FBI believes THAT PERSON to be either the murderer or a relative of the murderer, so DO pay close attention to anyone at that location, which is: Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine the addresses from 120 to 160.
Someone at zip-code 04064-1520 is daily, trying VERY DESPERATELY to access the password protected pages, videos, and images. The things I can see them doing via the tracking cookies, makes it appear that they are in some sort of hyper panic over it.
You know, when my site was hacked in November 2013 and September 2015 - both times while I was in the hospital having surgery, that's the same zip code that did the hacking. Whoever it is who lives at 04064-1520, they really, really, REALLY have some sort of vendetta on my website, one that has lasted for over a decade now.
This current, daily hyper panic attempts of the 04064-1520 zip code to access the password protected pages started on December 23, 2023 (same day this image went up on FaceBook)

...and is still going on daily now on February 7, 2024
Add on top of trying to access the password protected pages about my son's murder, they are also trying to access this image to remove it's file from my site:

Apparently, this picture of the Claire woman who murdered my son and crippled me on November 14, 2013, has really struck a nerve big time with someone living at zip code 04064-1520.
Public access information about my son's murder can be found here.
If you HAVE information important to the investigation of my son's murder or any of the harassment, vandalism, and hate crimes done to my family since 1997, give that information to FBI Agent Andy Drewer.
You can call him at:
FBI Agent
Andy Drewer at
207-774-9322
Or you get go into his office and talk to him in person at 1 Middle Street Portland, 4thh floor (its the big building right behind the Portland Police parking garage, just past the Federal Court House. Yes, The Federal Building. Obviously.
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If you want some stories to get you started in The Pink Necromancer series, reading these first will give you a good introduction to the 3 main characters:
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My Elves Are JellyFish...and I asked Google AI and ChatGPT 5.6 what they thought of this.
As requested, my daily writing prompt series is now available print paperback editions on Amazon.
There are 20 volumes of this writing prompt series currently planned and in varying stages of finishing, hopefully all 20 will be published by the end of 2026. I likely will do a 2nd series of writing prompt books in 2027.
The first of the Visual Novels/Video Games for The Adventures of Quaraun the Inane/The Pink Necromancer series is published and available on Itch.io, there are 3 more planned for release in 2026, 6 more planned for release in 2027, and the big 60-hour 80k word 150 page one (Quaraun Goes To the Fair) is planned for a 2028 release.
There is a Pink Necromancer card game and a Pink Necromancer board game, as well as a Pink Necromancer table top RPG supliment for Dungeons and Dragons, all in the works, and to be released over the next couple of years as well.
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Update Sept 3, 2026:
I am able to get around enough to take Koko to dog park... today is 29 days since getting out of hospital. My diet is still mostly liquid, but im eating some solid food again, but its like rice or soft mushy baby food type stuff because I still can not chew yet, though I can swallow again. My jaw is still not functioning good so im having trouble talking still. So there's been slight improvement to my mouth, throat, and jaw, but, zero improvement to my eye, which is a major concern, be Im almost fully blind right now. im legally blind since birth in my left eye, so I have no ability to fall back on using my left eye. My right eye is the one injured and my vision in it is "40% decreased" according to my doctor, but it wasn't good vision to begin with, and right now my right eye is not much different from my legally blind left eye. Which I why I have to have someone drive my car for me instead of me driving my car myself right now, which is very frustrating, because, being a female, I had to fight for over twenty years to be allowed to drive. I started sneaking out at age 31 and dressing as a man to go to Old Orchard Beach high school to get a ged, because us females are not allowed to go to school. And i was 37 years old when snuck out to the DMV and got a driver's permit and started going to college. I was 42 and 8 months pregnant when my family found out I was going to college and thats when I was punished by the backhoe driving over my house and my spine broken with a golf club and my baby born right then and killed with same golf club. So it's very frustrating now, so soon after finally being able to drive , to now not be able to drive because of an eye injury, especially after 14 years of being paralyzed from the golf club and not being allowed to have a wheelchair, again, because i am female and we females are simply not allowed to do anything. I hate the culture I was born into. I wish I had the freedom to go to school and drive a car the way American women do. I wish having my spine broken with a golf club and my baby killed with a golf club and a backhoe driven over my house was not how men in my family punishment women in my family for learning to read and write. Its so frustrating not being able to to drive again, so soon after 14 years being paralyzed, and being paralyzed by the golf club was the punishment for getting a driver's license back in 2013 after 30 years of men not letting me have one. I hate my family's culture and how they treat us women.
I get so sick of Americans telling me how they wish they could be a Gypsy… they are either misogynist woman hating pigs, or delusional idiots who haven't got a clue how shittily we Gypsy women are treated by Gypsy men, because no one in their righ mind who knows anything about Gypsy culture would ever want to be part of it. I hate that I was born a Gypsy.
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update sept 7, 2026
"You would not make a good teacher"... what does that mean, and why are there so many people on Railroad Ave and Western Ave and Cutts St why walk up to me and say that to me?
I find it very confusing. I have low functioning Autism (the Rain Man type) and so i have very little understanding of words beyond the basic ones, and i never went to to school, so I never learned maths or sciences, and I only had remedial classes at Southern Maine Community College, because I did not have an education to enroll with regular, I was there taking every reading and writing class they had to learn how to read and write, and also took speaking classes to learn how to talk (i spoke Shetland Scottish language because that was language my grandmother spoke but she died when I was 8 so I only knew that language to speak and write, and I was 37 when I went to college and 42 when I learned English speaking and I still cant speak English good yet), all the other classes I took were art painting and cooking.
So the phrase "You would not make a good teacher" makes no sense to me because it seems to imply that I am trying to be a teacher, but I don't have anything close to the education ti be a teacher, and im not trying to be a teacher. So I don't know why people keep saying this phrase to me and I assume it must have some sort of a slang meaning, but I can't figure out what it could be of why do these people keep saying it to me.
see video below for more information:
@eelkat "You would not make a good teacher"... what does that mean, and why are there so many people on Railroad Ave and Western Ave and Cutts St why walk up to me and say that to me? I find it very confusing. I have low functioning Autism (the Rain Man type) and so i have very little understanding of words beyond the basic ones, and i never went to to school, so I never learned maths or sciences, and I only had remedial classes at Southern Maine Community College, because I did not have an education to enroll with regular, I was there taking every reading and writing class they had to learn how to read and write, and also took speaking classes to learn how to talk (i spoke Shetland Scottish language because that was language my grandmother spoke but she died when I was 8 so I only knew that language to speak and write, and I was 37 when I went to college and 42 when I learned English speaking and I still cant speak English good yet), all the other classes I took were art painting and cooking. So the phrase "You would not make a good teacher" makes no sense to me because it seems to imply that I am trying to be a teacher, but I don't have anything close to the education ti be a teacher, and im not trying to be a teacher. So I don't know why people keep saying this phrase to me and I assume it must have some sort of a slang meaning, but I can't figure out what it could be of why do these people keep saying it to me. #mainelife #biddefordmaine #maine #disabilitytiktok #Biddeford ♬ original sound Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author
update Sept 15, 2026:
I have some slight movement in some my fingers again again after over a decade being paralyzed
you remember how I used to be a professional doll making, pattern designer, and embroiderer, back before I became paralized and before my son was murdered and being the backhoe drove over my house?
all my equipment, sewing machines, ect were all destroyed by the backhoe driving over my house, and I have been quardepelegic for over a decade because of it so could not use my hands to sew or draw or embroider, and so only continued to do my writing of novels since then because I could do that with dragon dictation software,
well, since 2016, I been playing Witcher 3 and don't starve video games on twitch livestream, one hand two fingers, as part of my therapy to regain nerve and muscle use of my fingers, and now after 10 years of that, I have somewhat more movement in my fingers and im thinking maybe I can try to do embroidery and doll making again, but not sure, anyways, now im rebuying all of my sewing and embroidery equipment that the backhoe destroyed when it drove over my house, and hopefully I can use my hand enough to embroider again.
waiting for stuff to arrive in mail, so soon I should find out if ten years of twitch gaming has given me enough muscle strength to use my fingers to embroider again.
update to the previous video, answering viewer question about lack of hospital vs broken spine
Wheelchair Fundraiser... I need to upgrade to a power wheelchair, the manual one just isn't enough anymore. But the power wheelchair is $25k. Yes, twenty five thousand dollars. Wtf? I can get a car for a quarter that price, why are wheelchairs so damned expensive? That's more money then I make in five years, so I need to start a fundraiser for it.
Well, it's October again and, yep, she's back, the s.s NaNoWriMo ML is in my inbox for the 9th year in a row, this time I'm sucking ideas out of her head 10 years before she gets them...what? Good god, this has got to be her craziest accusation yet! LOL!
So, I was going through my email today (October 25, 2013) and discover one of those "odd" email, that is not a question, but rather a rant. Normally I don't reply to them, because most of them are just strangers blowing off steam. They needed someone to scream at and I was an easy click away. Why scream obscenities at someone you know and destroy your marriage when you can yell at a complete stranger from behind your computer right? Something like that I suppose. There sure are a lot of folks who do it at least.
Like I said normally I skim through the rant, add their email to my blocked list, delete the message, and move on. Once in a while however, one will show up that I feel does warrant a response, or at least, it requires I write an article about it. As you know, I never reply directly via email to any email I receive. I simply DO NOT send emails, and anyone contacting me via email knows to look for an article response if I respond at all. And so here is my response. The email is very long and I will not post it here, only excerpts from it. The basic topic of the email was:
"You Stole My Idea - I was going to write a book, but you already wrote it 10 years ago!"
I received another email from the woman I shall henceforth term "that nut-job author" - you know that one whom 2 weeks ago had that strange confusing outburst of how angry she was at me because I "steal her thunder" and how I'd better not take part in NaNoWriMo this year because now its her "time to shine".
Yeah, still no clue what she's talking about in that email, but anyways, so another email from her, like before she introduces herself as "an unpublished writer of middle grade children's novels", explains how she "knows" me from the NaNoWriMo forums, tells me she also lives in Maine (in a town 2 counties north of me, waay up in the boonies of Northern Maine), and we met once at a writer's meeting at Panera in 2009, do I possibly remember her (Yes, I do I remember her - she's the woman who went screaming out of the cafe saying "I'm not going to attend any meetings EelKat attends! You let her join this group and you'll never see me here again! It's me or her!" - and true to her word she never came back, of course I run these meetings so, it's kind of hard for me to not be there, you know. How could I forget her?) and after this introduction she than goes into her email...
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This one starts out telling me how she was getting ready for NaNoWriMo and had this great idea for a middle grade children's book set in FunTown here in Saco, Maine, and how it'll be a murder mystery with the kids finding a dead body in the roller coaster. |
Rollercoaster in... Panoramic Images... Buy This at Allposters.com |
I'm thinking, sounds
pretty cool, way to go.
But than I keep reading her email and it
takes a turn of hysterical raving and ranting again, starting with the
line... "I was already to write this for NaNoWriMo until I found out you
stole my idea!!!!!".... uhm...wait...what?
Than she raves and
rants, same as the last email, more accusations of stealing her thunder
and stepping on her toes, yet another rant about how she has never been
able to publish anything because I'm always two steps ahead of her,
blah, blah, blah, just like in her other email...
I'm thinking What the...? Where is all this coming from? Good God honey you need help.
I keep reading. It turns out, for whatever reason, she feels she has to compare her writings to mine, and in going through a list of stories I've written, she came across my old "Bloodfall in PlayLand", a story I wrote about 10 years ago.
"Bloodfall in Playland" is set in Old Orchard Beach's Palace PlayLand.
It's about these kids who get stuck on the top of the Palace Playland
ferris wheel, just as a space ship loaded brain sucking alien zombies
lands on the beach.
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While these kids are trapped on the top of the ferris wheel zombie aliens rip everybody apart and eat them. Zombies from space massacre pretty much everyone in the amusement park except for the kids who were safely stuck on top of the ferris wheel, where the zombies can not reach them. |
She spent several pages worth of typing ranting about how I'm the reason
she is nearing 50 years old and still unpublished, and will probably
never be published and it's all my fault because she just can't compete
with someone like me.
I'm reading this and thinking, who is this
woman and why does she feel the need to compete with me at all? I don't
get it. Why is she hung up on comparing her works to mine like this? Why
can't she just get off her lazy ass and do what I do and you know, just
actively publish stuff?
I mean well gee wiz, if I sat around comparing
myself to other writers I'd never have time to get my own works
published either! *sheesh*
Than she goes off on a rant of "I was
all set to write this for NaNoWriMo in 5 days, but now I find out you
wrote a story about a murder in Palace Playland, and now I can't write
my story about a murder at FunTown. I'll never get published now and
it's all your fault. I wanted to write this, but can I? No! You won't
let me will you? You had to go and write a story about Palace Playland
didn't you?"
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Uhm, wait, you lost me there. I wrote something 10 years ago and it's like an idea you got now, so you can't write you new idea because I wrote something similar years ago??? ??? 0.o |
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Wait she is telling me that because I wrote this M-rated Gorn horror short story 10 years ago about alien zombies eating tourists in a Southern Maine amusement park, therefor I have stolen her idea for a children's novel she was planning to write next month about kids who solve a murder is a different Southern Maine amusement park, ten years before she came up with her idea?
"BloodFall in Playland" was about 15 pages long near as I can remember, I'll have to look it up. (This whole thing was inspired by a Sci-Fi Network horror movie, btw.)
There was nothing remotely children's story, chapter book, murder mystery, or middle grade novel about it. It was set on a ferris wheel, not a roller coaster, and it takes place at Palace Playland in Old Orchard Beach, 4 miles away from FunTown in Saco.
Other than there is a "murder" in a park in Maine, I can see no connection between the two at all.
And than there is the fact that I wrote it 10 years ago.
Yet here she is accusing my of stealing her idea? Telling me she can't write her book now, because I already wrote one like it?
Let me go over this one more time, see if I got this right. She can't write a story set in an amusement park in Maine, no where's near where she lives, because 10 years ago I wrote a story set in an amusement park, that I happen to live across the street from and use frequently in many of my stories, because I often walk across the street set myself down under one of the rides and write while I watch the tourists spinning through the air?
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So, because I write stories frequently using Palace Playland as a backdrop, because, I don't know, I live a few feet from the front entrance gate of the park (see - there's me, standing at the front gate, right in this picture --->), ...you're telling me that no one else on the planet is allowed to write stories set in Maine amusement parks, because I write stories set in Maine amusement parks? Am I the only one who thinks this woman hasn't got her head screwed on right? |
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And this is the same woman who 2 weeks ago, emailed me, to threaten me and tell me not to enter NaNoWriMo this year because as she worded it, it's her turn to shine.
If you want to shine, Honey, why don't you just get off your ass and shine? Ain't no one here trying to get in your way or stop you, so I don't know what you are talking about, Okay? (And I forwarded that email to the police btw, because, whether you know it or not, you are a cyber bully creep, and I don't take to lightly to be threatened, not after ANOTHER stalker threatened me before and I didn't take him seriously until after he built a bomb out of a grease fryer and burned my house down. [yes, you heard me - I'm calling YOU a stalker too, this is the 3rd time you've contacted me throwing threats in my face for no reason at all, other than the fact that you feel shitty over not publishing your books so you have to take it out on someone who does publish their books as a way to make yourself feel better by belittling someone else, which is exactly why I am making an example of you, and chose to answer your email - consider yourself lucky I didn't post your email, complete with your name and email address, because I could have you know, and you contact me with a 4th psychotic email I will, because because 3 strikes you're out Honey, the police already have your other emails.])
I do not appreciate your weekly emails spouting off your hissy fits of how great big and important you think you are, nor do I like being told by some whining spoiled brat prick that I'm not allowed to join NaNoWriMo for my 10 year, simply because you feel inferior. I'm not doing NaNoWriMo to show up your prissy face, nor am I going to drop out and not do it just to please your snotty nosed stuck up ass.
You got some serious control issues woman.
You know what? I don't give a frigging rat's ass what you do in NaNoWriMo. It doesn't matter to me what you do or do not write. I don't care. I'm never going to read it, and if you keep spouting off your babyfaced insanity in other author's inboxes, guess what? No one is ever going to read anything you write, because you are just too busy worrying about what other people are doing to take the time to focus on your own work.
News Flash: If you think your opinion of me has any effect - Honey let me assure you that none of my self worth is wrapped up in what you think of me, and by the way you are bossing me around and telling me what I can or can not do, it sounds like you think you have some sort of control over me.
I just do not understand the point of why you contacted me in the first place. Can I ask, who died and made you God?
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Tell me how many hours did you spend
writing that email to me? Three? Four? Five? It was long enough that I
bet you spent a good half a day typing it up. Uhm...yeah, so... ...do you take sugar and cream with your crazy or do you just randomly contact every Maine author you can find and write these weird emails for the fun of it? Think about it Honey,
really stop and think about it. |
You put in a good 6 hours writing a shitty, hate filled email to me. And than 2 weeks later, you did it again.
That's 12 hours you could have spent writing your story.
That's 12 hours you could have been editing your manuscript.
That's 12 hours you could have been researching publishers.
That's 12 hours you could have been actively working on forwarding your writing career.
And tell me, what did you get out of those 12 hours typing hate filled nonsence to me?
Nothing! Not one thing. It didn't do you one bit of good at all.
Twelve hours down the drain.
Twelve hours wasted.
And don't write back and say: "Well how many hours did you spend typing this answer?" I'll tell you.
It took me 6 hours to write, edit, format, find matching affiliate links, and publish. And that was not 6 hours wasted, because now that it is published, it will bring in anywhere from $1 a day to $300 or more each month for the rest of my life. So while you got nothing out of your hate filled email, me, I'm getting paid at minimum $365 a year for this 1 single solitary article written in answer to you. See, unlike you, I don't waste my time writing stuff that I don't get paid for.
That's why I don't answer ANY email, via an email, and ONLY answer emails, live online, via these articles on my website. See, there has to be something in it for me, otherwise I don't answer reader emails. It's gotta be a win-win, or I don't answer back. There's no win-lose, give-take with me. It's win-win, give-give or I ain't buying it.
People write questions to me because they need answers. They are truly looking for help, and if I know the answer, I tell them what I know. They don't pay for the answers, no, but I never write an answer that I don't get paid to write either.
And can you see NOW why I say you are wasting your time with these stupid hate-feast emails to me? You are complaining that you can't get nothing published, and yet you just wasted 12 valuable hours to tell me that, hours that you could have spent writing something publishable instead. And what did you get out of it?
Let me tell you what you got out of it. Knots in your stomach, a headache, heartburn, a sick feeling in the pit of your belly, and probably some serious bought of constipation followed by massive diarrhea, because you are so uptight and high strung that you stressed your bowels out of whack, and if you keep raving and ranting and bellyaching at people the way you just did at me, I wouldn't be at all surprised if you ended up working yourself into a state of being hospitalized. It's not good for your health to be a brown nosed busy body who gets worked up over things that really don't even effect you or your life at all.
And what good did it do you? You got yourself all worked up and sick over nothing. You complained because you can't get published, you complained because you didn't want me writing in NaNoWriMo and ending up with more stuff to publish, you complained because I have published way more than any person needs to, you complained because I'm leaving all you slow pokes in the dust, you wanted me to publish less to give you time to catch up, and all you did was give me yet another article to add to my long list of things I have published in my life time, putting me another step ahead of you, in this weird little competition you've drummed up in your own twisted little mind.
Honey, I don't know why you see me as competition, because there is no competition between us, okay? I don't know you from Adam. You are a complete stranger to me. Get it through your head: I don't know you and you mean nothing to me.
You want to ask me for help, I'll gladly help you, but to send me this accusatory nonsense and falsely accusing me of of writing 250,000 words each November just to out-shine you? Think about what you are saying here, Honey: I don't know you, you are a stranger to me, how in the heck can you possibly believe that I write 250,000 words during NaNoWriMo to try to outshine you? I have my own personal reasons for joining NaNoWriMo and they certainly do not involve you! What is wrong with you? Seriously, what the hell is wrong with you? Who the hell do you think you are?
Telling me you can't get anything published and it's all my fault? How the hell is it my fault? I'm not your agent, it's not my job to get your work published. It's your job to get your own work published. It's mu job to get my work published, and I'm doing that. It's not my fault if you are too lazy to do the work it takes to be a published author. I don't know where you think you get off with these wild idea of yours.
My advice to you? Breath. Relax. Meditate. Take a vacation. Unwind. De-stress. Hug a purple dragon. And mind your own business for once. It'll do you a world of good.
So for the 3rd time I am confused by this woman and her strange rational. Oh well. To each his own, I suppose. But I do gotta wonder, I mean this is the third time this exact same woman has flipped out and gone screaming nut case on me, and I haven't even got a clue who she is. She's a total stranger to me. Which bring up many questions in my mind, about, if she acts like this in her correspondence to fellow authors who are total strangers, what must she say to editors and publishers when sending them her manuscripts to be published?
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Can anybody say: Jealousy? The only logic I can see behind these ludicrise emails this woman feels compelled to write is, quite simply that she is a a bitter person with anger management issues and a serious inability to keep her insane jealousy under control. She feels that life owes her something, and I for what ever reason, also own her something, simply because I am a writer who is published and she is a writer who is not. It seems near as I can tell, that reading between the lines, she has been trying to get her books published for quite some time and has acquired a lifetime of rejection slips and is now frustrated by the fact that I've published 30+ books and 200+ short stories, and thus in a jealous rage is venting her anger out at me because I am published and she is not. |
Ah! Jealous Amongst the Jealous! Theodore Jacques... Buy This at Allposters.com |
But tell me, what reason is this to rain down brimstone and hell fire on a fellow writer?
If she was civil and had thought to ask my advice rather than rant obscenities, I could easily have helped her figure out why her stuff wasn't being published, and could have advised her on what she could do to get published.
And at the same time I wonder why doesn't she just self-publish her books like every other author who can't get published elsewhere does? And I wonder too if she is even aware of the fact that 95% of my published works were technically self-published seeing how I own the publishing house that published them? I wonder if she is looking at my books and seeing the publisher's imprint on them, and thinking I am not self-published?
Could this perhaps be the root of these strange emails she sees fit to send me? I think perhaps she has a warped view of who and what I am, I think she is seeing me as far more famous and far more popular than I really am.
My books are far from best sellers, my income from my fiction writing in minimum at best. I am famous yes, but I am famous because I was the 12 year old kid who was all over the media way, way back when I took on Proctor and Gamble head to head.
I became an author after I
was already famous and many of my fans and followers are not even aware
of the fact that I am an author! I don't think she is considering these
facts at all, and so she is looking at all these books I have, not
realizing that they are actually self-published or that I was a "local
celebrity" long before I wrote them.
I can't help but feel sorry
for this poor woman, because she seems so full of anger and bitterness
and is hell bent on seeking someone to blame for the reason why she's
having trouble getting published.
She seems to think of the publishing industry as a competition where writers compete against each other fighting fang and claw to be published before the next guy.
I also believe, I don't have to justify myself, my writings, or my reasons for joining NaNoWriMo, to this arrogant woman or anyone else and I have the best defender possible on my side (God) and feel sorry for anyone who chooses to mess with Him, whether they believe in Him or not. My guardian angel always protects me or hadn't you noticed?
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It is very sad that she sees the writing career in this light because with her bad attitude, she will never get far as a writer. One thing writers are known for is their comradery and helping each other out. There is no real sink or swim mentality in the publishing industry because published authors are always tossing life boats out to newbies and trying to help them succeed. And yet there has been a rise in the past 5 or 10 years of new writers, who like this woman, are hell bent on fighting their way to the top, even though there is no one out their trying to push them down. It is sad when you run across writers so bitter that they are like the lobstermen shooting at the other lobstermen across the bay, in a kill or be killed I have be the only winner attitude. Until she changes her attitude she will never get far in the publishing industry. Poor thing. |
New England- Go... Buy This at Allposters.com |
I would hope that this could serve as a lesson for future unpublished writers. We writers now published were once unpublished writers, just like you. We know how hard and frustrating it is to struggle in the goal of becoming published. We are not your enemies. We want to see you succeed. We want you to get published. We write these author websites and author blogs, filled with articles and posts on how we got to were we are, not to brag or boast, but rather to get you a helping hand and show you that if we can do this, you can too, and here we'll help you out by telling you how we did it so you can repeat our steps.
Did you know that the suicide rate of authors is higher than ANY other profession? Did you know that 9 out of every 10 published authors suffers from clinical depression and 7 out of every 10 has schizophrenia, and that the very act of prolific writing is not a talent but rather a symptom of serious lack of a will to live? Writers write for a reason and often that reason is because they literally can not do anything else.
There are people who try to write and feel like a failure, and than there are writers who suffer from not being able to stop writing. Writing has been classified by psychiatrists as a symptom of depression and a type of schizophrenia, and a warning sign that the person is suicidal can be seen by how much they write. Writers who write a lot are teetering on the edge. Published authors are rarely happy people, and people who try to write and think they have issues because they can't write, need to stop and ask themselves: Could it be that I am too sane, too healthy, too normal, too happy to be able to write?
That's why I say there is no such thing as Writer's Block. Either you have Schizophrenia and Depression and are thus compelled to write all day and all night because you feel it is the only thing that will keep you alive, or you are a normal healthy person who doesn't have a reason to write and therefor your brain doesn't give you ideas. It's as simple as that, and psychology has done studies on the mental state of writers vs people with writers block, to prove it.
So to all you unpublished writers out there everywhere: stop and think BEFORE you send that hate filled email.
Did you ever stop to think that the person you are sending your hate to may be on suicide watch and that your email could very well be the thing that pushes them over the edge? Could you really live with yourself if you found out it was your hate filled jealous range email that caused another person's death? Think about it.
Next time you feel compelled to write a hate filled email to some one, anyone, friend, family, stranger, whoever, stop and ask yourself: What price will your email charge? Is it worth someone's life? Is getting your anger off your chest it REALLY worth it?
And so in closing, would you like to know EXACTLY what I think of you?
I think you are a controlling creep who is so frustrated with your own life and lack of doing anything meaningful with it, that you spend your time looking for successful people who are doing the things you wish you were doing. Once you find these people you rail out mindless rants of hate to them, in hopes of hurting their feelings and making them feel as miserable as you feel, to justify your own feelings by bringing others down to your level, in an attempt to make yourself feel like "the big man". You are like the cave man who beat a helpless mouse over the head with a bi stick and is now pounding your fists on your chest to show others how great and wonderful you are for being a bully.
You feel justified in your hate because you think your opinion matters to me. You fail to realize that if reader opinions mattered to me than I would be writing novels with mass reader appeal, rather than a niche genre that no one ever heard of.
The fact remains, I write what I write not for my readers but for myself, and I don't care if anyone reads it or not, and I don't need your approval or permission to write. .
Likewise I do not join NaNoWriMo for any reason but for myself, and I don't care if you think I should be there or not, and I don't need your approval or permission to write 50,000 or more words in 30 days.
I don't know who died and made you God, but someday, someone is going to knock you off your high horse and it won't be pretty, so you best climb down off it and learn to live with all us 8billion peasants that exist in the world, because it's going to get awful lonely up there all by yourself on you golden throne in the clouds. Newsflash Honey: YOU ARE NOT GOD! You do not control the heavens and earth and I do not bend or bow to you.
So, all I have to say to you in answer to your email is this: I have no power over you that you don't give me, nor have you any power over me that I don't give you. If you obsess over what people think of you all the time it will keep you from doing the things you want to do.
No one is limiting you, but you.
No one is preventing you from shining in NaNoWriMo but you, if you took a look down at your feet, you'd see that it was you who is stepping on your own toes, and guess what Sugar Plum? No one is stopping you from writing that children's middle grade novel about a murder in FunTown, either.
You are building your own walls around yourself, you are putting up your own roadblocks, you are the only one stopping yourself from doing anything, and until you grow up and own up to the fact that you are ultimately the only one in control of your own destiny, than you will never get anywhere you want to be in life and being published will remain forever out of your reach.You need to stop worrying about other people and start worrying about yourself for a change.
There will always be people like you who hate those who are doing well, or at least those who you perceive to be doing better off than yourself. The best revenge is, of course, is for me to continue to do well. I can not help but wonder, Muffin, if you think I am so much better off then you, how terrible your life must be. I know there are folks out there who had worst experiences than I have, but it is so rare that I ever meet or encounter them. You poor thing, if you really think my life is so much better than yours, than your life must be absolute hell. I'm so sorry for whatever has happened to you, to make you feel I have it so well, but Honey, taking it out on me or anyone else isn't the answer.
I think more likely you are a troll, which is why I have not posted your email, because giving you the attention you don't deserve is, well, pointless. I write this article because this is the 3rd time this month you have emailed me, and if previous NaNoWriMos are any indicator, you are only just getting started and before long you will be on the NaNoWriMo, Maine Forums doing what you do EVERY YEAR since 2005, starting threads telling people to "stay away from EelKat" (and yes, I did notice that you already created one on the public forum 3 days after NaNoWriMo went into relaunch.), and Honey, here's a tidbit I bet you didn't know I knew:
#1) Because I am a Script Frenzy Municipal Liason, I do have access to reading the "private" moderator forums of the Maine, NaNoWriMo Forums and I AM aware of the fact that EVERY YEAR since 2005 you post dozens of hate filled ranting threads about me. I have access to these threads because like you, I too am a Maine ML. I do not respond to them, because you are nothing but a whining cry baby troll. And yes I can see that you have already created 3 such threads in the private ML only Maine Forums.
#2) Because I have a large family with more than 300 people in it (Mormons, remember?) I have more than a dozen relatives on the Maine, NaNoWriMo forums and guess what? Every time you abuse your NaNoWriMo ML privileges to mass NaNoMail Maine members (carefully remembering to delete my NaNoMail off the list) EVERY YEAR since 2005, they (my personal friends and family who you've been sending these private messages to) forward to me your hate filled NaNoMails about me. And I think it's pretty shitty of you to abuse your NaNoWriMo ML privileges to be slandering me behind my back and telling the lies you tell about me in these "secret messages" you've been sending via NaNoMail to other members of the Maine forums. I do not appreciate you telling other people the lies you said about me.
See, you are not as anonymous as you thought you were. You did not know that like yourself, I too am a Maine Municipal Liaison and have been reading your posts in the "private" ML forums right along. Like I said, I rarely post on the Maine public forums and I never post on the private ones, but that does not mean, I was in the dark on the things you have been saying on them. I have been simply choosing to ignore your trolling, but now you are emailing me directly which means your level of hate has risen, and thus your likelihood of showing up on my doorstep with a bomb (like another cyber stalker did in 2006) has just showed it's ugly head, and after 8 years, it is time for me to stop ignoring you and report you to the authorities.
I have ignored your petty whining and running your lying ass all over the NaNoWriMo forums for 8 years now, because I know you simply want me to hurt as much as you seem to think I need to hurt and you just want to see me telling in public I'm hurt by you because you think it validates your own false sense of superiority. But the thing is, you are nothing but a no body to me and I don't care what you think of me, therefore nothing you say hurts me in anyway.
Apparently this is frustrating you very deeply which is why you are becoming more persistent this year than in the past. Fact remains, Sugar Dumpling, you are only hurting yourself and making yourself look bad, and now you are also on file with local police for cyber stalking and if it doesn't stop, you'll soon have an FBI record as well, which could land you in prison.
I have been ignoring you because I did not see you as a threat, however it has become very clear in your last hysterical email, that your frustration levels at my not acknowledging or validating your petty need for 15 minutes of fame have reached a danger point where you feel the need to as you put it "do something about it" to get my attention.
And that is why I am writing this article, to let you know that, yes, I have been reading your steady, endless hysteria every October and November since 2005, and yes, I have been ignoring you because I did not think you worthy of comment and yes, you now have the attention you wanted, but it's it's not my attention you are getting now, it's the cops.
I don't know what this stupid petty vendetta you have is, but know this, this morning I have taken everything you sent and forwarded it to the police, and if you contact me or my family again, the FBI is next, because you are a cyber bully, and I've had it with your stupid, childish games.
You are nothing but a sick, twisted creep not worth the saliva it would take to spit on you. I don't know what your problem is, but no one can help you out here Honey, it's a road you gotta walk on your own two feet. It is between you and God and no one else. Take it up with him and leave me alone.
I'll leave you with a cute YouTube video that examines why commenters like yourself REALLY leave comments like the ones you persist in emailing to me.
Thank you and have a nice life.
October 25, 2013
Well, for the TENTH October in a row, psycho crazy nut-job unpublished author wanna be is on the war path and at it again. She really pulled a big one this year. If you don't know what happened, read the two links below about the hacking of my KBoards account and the 1-star fake book review onslaught.
And, as I'm reading this...I can't help but ask myself, this isn't the same s.s NaNoWriMo ML and the Purple Dragon (the Westbrook Panera incident of October 2009) duo from Northern Maine again is it? Good god, it certainly is starting to look like she's back. Do you guys remember her? LOL! OMG!
She hasn't contacted me since October/November 2013...wait...
Before than she did this in October/November 2012 as well.
Hhmmm. And the last time she contacted me before that was, oh look: October/November 2011
My god! Kenrda...is that you! Are you the creepazoid who hacked my KBoards account? It did happen in October didn't it and you have stated a pretty nasty often violent cyber and offline attack on me (and my car) EVERY October since 2006.
Good god. Kendra, did you forget I know your name and can send the police right to your house. I don't know why it never occurred to me that the Kboards incident happened in October. Kendra - your buddy J.B. and J.T. (<- links to the news reports) already went to prison. Do you really want to join them?
s.s NaNoWriMo ML, if it turns out you were the one behind the KBoards incident - you ARE going to prison, because this isn't your first offence and he went to prison for attempted murder, if you recall, he on October 18, 2006 built a bomb and blew up my house...because YOU said on the NaNoWriMo forum in October 2006...oh, look at that: "I wish somebody would kill that Gypsy scumbag".
s.s NaNoWriMo ML: YOU ARE ALREADY AN ACCESSORY TO ATTEMPTED MURDER! DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KEEP ADDING CRIMES TO YOUR ALREADY LONG LIST?
For those who don't know s.s NaNoWriMo ML works for NaNoWriMo. She lives here in Maine about 75 miles from me. She was friends with J.B. who built the bomb that blew up my house, and she is...oh...you people are gonna love this: She a Romany "Gypsy" and she (falsely) claims her father owns FunTown (the family that owns FunTown lives down the street from me, that's why I know she's lying about that because I know the people who ACTUALLY do own FunTown SplashTown USA), and her clan has been feuding with and attacking other Gypsy/Roma/Traveller clans in Maine for close to 60 years...which WOULD in fact explain the anti-Gypy hate propaganda that flooded KBoards and my books in...wow look at that date: October 2014.
October
AGAIN
s.s NaNoWriMo ML has staged one of these cyber AND OFFLINE attacks EVERY October since she started working for NaNoWriMo in 2005. I don't know why it took me so long to make the connection between s.s NaNoWriMo ML and KBoards incident.
But yeah, hacking into my KBoards account, that is also s.s NaNoWriMo ML. Creating 52 fake accounts on Amazon? Oh yeah. That is so s.s NaNoWriMo ML
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I'll point out at this point, that Pine Land Center (the state mental health institute), shut down in 2005 and most of their patients have been without treatment ever since...yeah...that says a lot.
Kendra is a problem. A pretty big one. She has a long history of finding local (Maine) authors and lashing out at them in person at their homes in wild crazy fury. There are at least 7 other local authors (that I know of) that she has attacked, bullied, and harassed OFFLINE. She frequently shows up at libraries and cafes (most local authors don't dare to meet at the local Paneras anymore as a result of her frequent psychotic meltdowns in the cafe) and just lunges at anyone using a computer, because she suspects them of being writers and she has this weird little conspiracy that every author is out to get her.
She has a service dog, a white poodle that she dyes purple and the dog is, in theory, supposed to pull her out of crowds to prevent her from violently attacking people.
Most of the year no one hears from her, but every October, she goes off her meds as a way to "prepare" for NaNoWriMo. She claims she is unable to write when she's taking her psychiatric medications, so every October she stops taken them to prepare for NaNoWriMo in November and every October, she randomly shows up at the homes of various local authors to scream obscenities and threaten to kill them, if they dare write a book and publish it, before she does.
Most authors in the area try to ignore her psychotic meltdowns, but each year she seems to be getting more violent, and well, we do know that whoever hacked my KBoards account, did so from a public computer less then 5 miles from my home... which well...if the shoe fits...she is becoming increasingly more threatening and increasingly more violent and she did dramatically increase her cyber attacks in 2013, and oddly, I didn't hear from her October 2014, but then again, I did leave NaNoWriMo in 2013 because I'd just had it with her well...let me tell you what she did on the NaNoWriMo Forum in October 2013...she started a series of "Anti-EelKat" & "anti-Gypsy" threads and then, created a whole bunch of fake accounts to post on them in, and then, hacked my NaNoWriMo account and rewrote my posts....yeah...like I said, the KBoards incident was not the first time one of my forum accounts fell under heavy fire with with Gypsy hate and then was hacked.
Kendra is a fairly large problem every October/November. This woman has serious mental health issues, and good god, she incredibly violent in person. When she's on her meds, she fine. Acts normal and everything, but take her off her meds and god you better keep a gun away from her.
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This page was written by Wendy Christine Allen of 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine.
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While there are around 20k pages on this website, most of them are blocked from search engines, with only around 800 of them available for appearing in Google/Bing/etc search results. The remainder can only be accessed via the various links found throughout this site. This was done deliberately on my part, and I did it because the bulk of the pages on this website are chapters from 138 novels and 423 novellas, so only the first page of each novel and novella indexed by search engines, and the remainder are linked in order, one page at a time, via clicking "next page" at the end of each. So if you are looking for a specific page from a specific novel, Google can't help you.
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Do you know who drove this backhoe over my house at 146 Portland Avenue, Old Orchard Beach, Maine on August 8, 2013? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.
My house at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, July 4, 2013, photo taken because we had just finished building a baby room on the back. vs My house August 8, 2013, when the same group of people (yes group, the golf club woman was not alone when she attacked November 14, 2013, nor was she alone with her second attack July 2016.) who murdered my son on November 14, 2013 at Southern Maine Community College and crippled me July 26, 2016 at scarborough WalMart,... they arrived the first time with a backhoe on August 8, 2013, that they used to drive over my house, during a time of day that I normally was home asleep... I had to work a different shift at the Waffle Cone Pizza Food Truck at George's Parking Lot by Bill's Pizza at the OBB Peir, that day, otherwise, I too would be at the bottom of a landfill, along with my house and everything I owned that was also in the house. I was 5 months pregnant at the time and have been homeless for just under 14 years, homeless ever since....
... which means it is now only a few weeks from the 14th anniversary of my son's murder. I was 8 month pregnant November 14, 2013, and a student ay SMCC, and coming out of the Buglight Lighthouse art studio after art class, when a still unidentifiedwoman wielding a golf club attacked me, severed my spine, while I was 8 months pregnant, triggered early labour, then killed my son minutes after he was born.
While accusing me of being transgender, screaming "transvestite freak" and "look at that thing, that's Ken's son in a dress"... while I was 8 months pregnant.
My house at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, July 4, 2013, photo taken because we had just finished building a baby room on the back. vs My house August 8, 2013, when the same group of people (yes group, the golf club woman was not alone when she attacked November 14, 2013, nor was she alone with her second attack July 2016.) who murdered my son and crippled me, arrived the first time with a backhoe that they used to drive over my house, during a time of day that I normally was home asleep... I had to work a different shift at the Waffle Cone Pizza Food Truck at George's Parking Lot by Bill's Pizza at the OBB Peir, that day, otherwise, I too would be at the bottom of a landfill, along with my house and everything I owned that was also in the house. I was 5 months pregnant at the time and have been homeless for just under 14 years, homeless ever since. |
The backhoe driver returned November 14, 2013, armed with a golf club, used it to break my spine and smash my baby's brains out on the ground
On November 14, 2013, my son was murdered. I was 8 months pregnant, leaving my college classroom, and just getting into my car, when 3 strangers, a man and two women, armed with golf clubs leapt out from behind my car screaming "kill or be killed, kill the transvestite freaks, kill them all before they kill us! look at that thing! That is Ken's son, look at how it's dressed! kill the transvestite freaks! kill or be killed"... while the bald man and the red haired woman chanted this over and over, the blonde woman, lunged with the golf club.
She severed my spine, I am now a quadriplegic, and been paralyzed arms and legs, and in a wheelchair for 13 years now. She broke my hips, my knees, my legs, ruptured most of my discs, and shattered three of my vertebrae so bad that the shards of bone acted like glass and embedded themselves into my spinal column nerve bundle.
The attack also triggered labour.
My son was born in that parking lot, and he lived only a couple of minutes, before the deranged blonde woman, beat his head in and smashed his brains out, with the same golfclub she had just used to sever my spine and leave me crippled for the rest of my life.
Realizing that I was not transgender, and they'd just murdered a baby, the man grabbed the 2 women and forcibly dragged them away to a 4 door white pickup truck, and they left me there to die.
The FBI told me later, that a few weeks before this attack, and transwoman, had murdered a cis woman, in a parking lot, abou 20 miles away from where I was attacked. The FBI, believes that my attackers, had somehow found out I wrote transgender fiction, connecting my real name to my penname, (my father's name is in fact "Ken", and I do have a brother) and believed that I wrote transgender fiction, because I was myself transgender, even though I'm not transgender. The FBI, believes the attackers, thought I was my brother, pretending to be a woman.
The FBI investigation, into my son's murder, has dragged on for 13 years, and still now in 2026, continues on, with the FBI, still not having yet identified my attackers, and only guessing at what their motive was.
Thus we come to 2014, and the full swing change of the series I write. WHY my series, went from just a transman main character living life, to the full blown Mpreg genre series that it now is today.
Before the attack, I had a chance of having a baby. I don't know. And because I'm in America, I'm too old to adopt. You have to be under 45 years old to adopt a baby. That is the law in America. I was informed this, when we tried to adopt, now that my injuries leave me unable to get pregnant a 9th time.
Thus began my obsessively writing, my transman main character, pregnant. Always pregnant now. Every time. Every story. Stories that now fully focus on pregnancy, labour, miscarriages, babies dying, babies living, raising babies... the whole series, since 2014 has devolved into an outright baby obsession.
Meanwhile, reborn baby dolls were suggested to me by my therapist, and have also become a deeply obsessive part of my life. Because 13 years ago my son was murdered minutes after he was born, because a transphobic bigot mistook me for being transgender, I'm STILL in a wheelchair, struggling to relearn to use my arms and legs, now 13 years later, and I'm still DAILY dealing with police officers and FBI agents who while they are trying to find my son's killer, they are also daily reminding me... oh, yeah, my son was murdered, literally ripped out of my belly, by a transphobe. Who still has not been located and walks free to kill again.
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The golfclub woman as she looked during the golf club attack at Southern Maine community college November 14, 2013. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026. If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 |
The golfclub woman as she looked during the shopping cart attack at Scarborough WalMart July 26, 2016. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026. If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 |
The 2nd woman as she looked at both attacks, her hair goes all the way down to her knees. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026. If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer's accomplice, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 |
Do you know who these two woman who crippled me and murdered my baby, at Southern Maine Community College at 10PM on November 14, 2013, are, and what their connection to the backhoe that drove over my house is? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.
I am a legally blind quadriplegic, and low verbal, I have also published 138 novels in the last 48 years. It's not as impossible as people think. The problem being blind and quadriplegic, medically have different meanings then how those two words are used medically.
Fewer than 3% of all blind people see nothing. While 97% people who are classified as fully blind are able to see up to two feet in front of them. Legally blind means I can see more then two feet in front of me but not far enough to see twenty feet in front of me. In my case I can see about eight feet.
Quadriplegic, has varying levels, it means having a damaged nerve bundle in the spinal column causing limited mobility of all 4 limbs, (in my case this was done by a women wielding a golf club, who also beat my 8 month infant's head to pulp on the parking lot tarmak, at the same time she severed my spine with the same golf club; both on November 14, 2013; the FBI investigation into my son's murder and my being crippled has gone on now for 13 years, a few weeks away from 14 years now, and the FBI has still not identified the killer or her motive). Contrary to popular misconception, quadriplegic does NOT mean ZERO movement, it means means limited movement, specifically in means unable to lift arms over head, unable to grip fingers around objects to pick them up, and unable to stand for more then 5 minutes to a time. Because there are so many thousands of nerves in each limb it is actually very rare for there to be 100% no movement, but how much, and to what extent varies by patent depending upon the specific point of injury to the spinal column.
Meaning typing is still possible for over 60% of all quadriplegics.
In my case, it was the lower spine that was severed, cutting off completly my ability to move my right leg, leaving limited feeling in my left leg, and an ability to stand but not walk, with crutches, for the first 9 years. I regained enough nerve growth in my legs by the 9th year to be able to take ten or twelve steps allowing me to get out of bed for the first time since the golf club attack; This in turn lead to me being able to start using a wheelchair, as I was able to sit upright for the first time as well.
Because the shattered vertebrae bone fragments are broken off completly and embedded into the nerve bundle just above my tailbone, doctors were saying I would never walk again, but now at 13 years, I am able to push mu wheelchair like a walker, a distance of almost a thousand steps a day. Though doctors are still doubtful I will ever walk "normally" again, I have proven them wrong, when their said 13 years ago, that I would never walk again at all.
But because of the placement of the damage to my spine, regaining hand use, was always thought possible, it was just a matter of waiting long enough for nerve regrowth, along side daily finger exercises. I was able to continue writing, after becoming quadriplegic, because I still have use of my right thumb, and 2 fore figures of my right hand. And can type 90 words per minute with those 3 fingers.
I however have no wrist strength, elbow strength, or shoulder strength, so I am not able to form a fist, or lift objects, or brush my hair, or my teeth, all thing I have to have my caretaker do. But, those things are not needed for typing. Unfortunately, my pinky and ring fingers are "nerve dead" and drag over the keyboard, and cause horrific spelling errors and typos, which are incredibly frustrating to deal with.
Unfortunately trying to edit errors myself, just makes the errors worse, because those same two fingers drag over the keyboard yet again. Prior to the golf club attack, I rarely had spelling errors; now I got more spelling errors then someone is learning English as second language. Editing is a challenge, that I've had to accept, I simply can not do myself, and I have to hire several editors to help with that.
Low verbal means sounds can still be made, sounds that software programs like Dragon can be trained to recognize and translate, and type into full words. More then half my novels were typed with this method.
I still have a long ways to go before I am anything close to being able to do the things I could do before the golf club woman beat my baby's brains out and shattered my spine. And you know what's more frustrating then how slow mu medical progression has been? The fact that it's been 13 years and the police and FBI are still coming up at dead ends as to who the woman who murdered my baby was, or why she even did it.
My son's 14th birthday is only a few weeks away, but he didn't even get to live long enough to celebrate his 1st birthday, I don't even know why. And I can't wait to regain my ability to walk again, because regaining my ability to walk, means gaining the ability to go outside and start looking for my son's murderer myself instead of sitting at home trapped in a wheelchair waiting for the police and FBI to to find her. So, writing isn't a big priority for me anymore. I only write now, as a way to exercise my hands, in between relearning to walk.
Never let a disability stop you. Plenty of writers, artists, athletes, do not let either blindness, speech impediments, or limited mobility hold then back from perusing their careers.
Do you know who these two woman who crippled me and murdered my baby, at Southern Maine Community College at 10PM on November 14, 2013, are, and what their connection to the backhoe that drove over my house is? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.
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