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November 14, 2023 was the 10 year anniversary of the November 14, 2013 murder of my 8 month old infant son, at BugLight Lighthouse Art Studio of Southern Maine Community College in South Portland, Maine. If you have any information about who his killer is, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

NEVER FORGET:

My Son Was Murdered, The Killer Walks Free, Your Child Could Be Next!

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FAQ: What are the most visited pages on this website and how many visits do they get?

Several years ago, I wrote an article on how to write different types of magic uses, or rather how I personally write various types of magic users within the context of my Quaraun books. Today that page is one of my top ten most visited articles. It gets 50 to 500 views/reads/hits/visits per day depending on the time of the years and has had over 200k visits total since it was published.

Amphibious Aliens: Debunking The Atwater Family's Alien Abduction Hoax with more then 30MILLION reads since 2007 and The GoldenEagle: Debunking Stephen King's World's Most Haunted Car Hoax with over tenMILLION reads since 2007 still rank as the two most visited articles on my website, but, neither of those are writing related.

Writing Medieval Servants is my most visited writing related article with over 7MILLION reads.

The most requested, but apparently not so easy to find writing article is EelKat's Park Bench Method To Writing (you have to scroll half way down the page to find it. It's after the list of writing prompts). The name of the page is NOT "EelKat's Park Bench Method of Writing" which is why you guys have so much trouble finding it, LOL!)

This website was started in 1996 and has 1 to 3 new articles (all written by me, I am the only writer on this site) published almost daily. In 2017 we crossed ten thousand articles published. As of 2023, EACH article gets MINIMUM 10 to 70 reads PER DAY, with the high traffic articles getting 500+ reads per day.

And since December 2019, my website now gets three hundred thousand to 7 million reads per month - well over ONE HUNDRED MILLION PAGE READS PER YEAR, making it not only the single most trafficked site in the State of Maine, but also one of the most visited websites in ALL OF NEW ENGLAND!

{{{HUGS}}} Thank you to all my readers for making this possible!

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 TRIGGERED! I'm a Straight Cis Woman, but I am deemed Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach, Are you too gay for the bigoted, minority harassing, white power, gay hating psychos of The Old Orchard Beach Town Hall Too? 

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Writing Medieval Servants
in Historical Fiction

Writing Medieval Servants: Their jobs and their place in historical fiction.

October 14, 2013

What do you want to become? 
What did you do today to step closer to that goal?
Whatever you do, be your best at it!
And remember to have yourself a great and wonderfully glorious day!

~EK
EelKat.com
pinterest.com/eelkat/

By EelKat Wendy C Allen

If you ever made fun of or had any part in the destruction of my farm, and the illegal selling of half of my land to Colliard, you shall lose your land.

If you ever made fun of or had any part in my being homeless since 2006 - YES, I AM still homeless in 2023, you shall become homeless.

If you ever made fun of or had any part in the backhoe driving over my house, you shall lose your house.

If you ever made fun of or had any part in my car being cut in half, you shall lose your car.

If you ever made fun of or had any part in my becoming crippled, you shall lose your health.

If you ever made fun of or had any part in the murder of my son, your child shall die an equally horrible death. If you haven't got a child to lose, it will be a brother or sister or parents or spouse or whomever you love the most, and that you should know it was this curse which you brought upon yourself that killed them, they will die on exactly the 7 year anniversary of the very first time, you mocked the death of my child.

Evil men go out of their way to try to drive a person to suicide.

Are you an evil man?

Are you sure you're not?

How many people have YOUR hate filled words killed?

Next time you go to do a mean thing to a fellow human, stop and really think about the consequences of your actions.

Did you ever notice how every one has a story to tell about me, yet not one of them ever speaks the truth?

What lies has YOUR gossiping tongue spread about me?

Did you know...

October 16, 2006, bomb blew up my house because of YOUR lies.

August 8, 2013, the house which replaced the one the bomb blew up, was driven over by a backhoe.

November 14, 2013, my 8 month old infant son was murdered because of your lies.

November 14, 2013, I was beaten up, paralized for 5 months, spent 18 weeks relearning to walk, I'm now crippled for the rest of my life, because of YOUR lies.

Are you proud of what you have done?

Enjoy your eternity in Hell. You earned it. You've certainly worked hard for it.

~EelKat

If you have any information about any of these events, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

Update: November 12, 2023

Two days is the 10 year anniversary of the murder of my 8 month old son. The killer has not been found yet. Old Orchard Beach, Maine Police at 207-935-4911 and Portland Maine FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322 are investigating the murder of my son so, if you have any information, please give it to them. https://www.eelkat.com/Never-Forget.html

UPDATE to add answer to question:

No. I am legally blind. I have been since I was 4 years old. I can not see what she looks like. I go by sound of voice and body smell to identify people. For what someone looks like I have to go by what others tell me. Like I said, I've never seen the woman who attacks, as she clearly knows I am legally blind and stays over 4 feet away from me. 

A person has to be closer than four feet from me in order for me to even make out the blur outline of their body shape/height/weight. But in order for ne to see their face they must have their face closer the EIGHT INCHES.

It's why I CAN identify the Claire woman and the Kendra woman who murdered my son, if anyone ever finds them and gets them in a line-up, I would be able to pick them out, but why I can not identify this weird crazy woman who shows up at the Biddeford apartment and stand yelling on the front porch and killed my dog Mickey in June 2023, and tried to kill me by poisoning my pizza at Round 1, while running around the restaurant screaming the same way she does here.

I can identify her voice and her laugh and her smell, its a very "Minnie Mouse type" high pitch shrieking with a megaphone style booming cackle laugh. And she smells really strong of alcohol drinks but I don't know what type as I am a Mormon and I don't know them. She also has a weird "rotting cat pee mixed with burned cotton candy smell" to her, which I am told by police, sounds like I am trying to describe a mix of "crack and weed" which the police said is some type of drug, but again, I'm a Mormon so I do not know those things. According to witnesses she is very fat, According to both my mother and my father she is well over 300lbs. Around twenty different people said she has "Shirley Temple Sausage curls" hair, while nearly a dozen other people said she has red curly hair, and several more people described her with straight purple hair, while some described her as wearing a "pulp fiction uma thurman wig".

In total well over a hundred people have come forward citing that she shows up on their porch and starts yell at them, and always starts out with some kind of "I got to warn you about EelKat and her demons" rant. They always describe her as "fat", "morbidly obeses", some say "200lbs" others say "300lbs". Some say she is in her 30s others say she is in her 40s. None of them know who she is, they all say she is a total stranger to them and they also all say, they had no idea who I was either.

They come to my apartment, they said, to tell me what she is doing, each of them saying they found out where I was because she told them my address, and they came over to tell me that she was doxxing my family. These people are always citing that they live in the Cutt St/Main street/May St/South St area, all of them saying they live within 3 or 4 blocks of me and that she walks to their buildings, they never see a car. My Biddeford apartment is 409 Main Street and she has shown up here daily from November 21, 2021 (the same day Etiole was shot; he says by her) until May 17, 2022. After May 2022, she showed up every holiday and every weekend, but no longer every day. 

Today is the 12th of November 2023 and she has already been here 4 times this month. At the same time, people around the Portland Ave and Cascade area of Old Orchard, are also arriving saying the same things, but about a man. They cite a white haired man, very skinny, rather short, around 5'6", around 70, is going driveway to driveway, parking a big Power Wagon sized Dodge Ram pickup truck across their driveway, then getting out, waving a rifle over his head, and yell up at their house ALSO saying he is there to "warn you about EelKat and her aliens". 

The two are believed to be grandfather/granddaughter, and FBI suspects they are the husband and granddaughter of the mystery "Claire" woman who murdered my son. They believe, that the homeless man who was murdered November 19, 2021, DID in fact know who the "Claire" woman who murdered my son was, and they believe this white haired man and woman who screams from porches are the ones who killed the homeless man, seeing how, he showed up on the 7 year anniversary of my son's murder, asking for the FBI phone number, claiming he knew who the woman who murdered my son was, but 5 days later he was murdered before he got a chance to talk to the FBI (the federal building in Portland was closed for the holiday week and the homeless man died before they reopened).

These 2, the white haired man and younger woman both showed up November 21, 2021, 2 days after the November 19, 2021 murder of the homeless man, who was murdered in the backyard of my Biddeford apartment, by the way, that week our building was yellow taped and crawling with police, that's why they were picking up the hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of chopped up pieces of the homeless man, which took them 3 days to find all of him. The FBI believes the homeless man was killed by someone who did not want him to identify my son's murderer... this homeless man's death is WHY my son's cold case, was reopened and the FBI once again here asking all the neighbors for leads. 

The FBI believes that the reason these two are hyper going from house to house all around me (I have 2 addresses: 409 Main Street Biddeford and 146 Portland Ave, Old Orcharch; and they are going up and down both streets and all side streets off of both streets), trying to spread slanderous rumors about me, most of the rumors involving some gibberish about demons, aliens, haunted cats, kidnapped cats, schizophrenia, and tons of other similar outright gibbering insanity.

The FBI believes they are spreading their wild gibbering slander in a weird attempt to get witness to NOT come forward with information about my son's murder. This in turn has led the FBI to believe that SOMEONE NEAR BY IS a witness to my son's murder and is scared of these two people. It is believed that this weird smear slander campaign these two are doing, is a direct fear tactic aimed at terrorizing someone they know to be a witness. 

These two are bullying and harassing my family on extreme and outlandish levels. The whole thing is very bizarre, and if this woman had NOT started running her gossiping, busy body, slandering mout h off on every front porch in the area, my son's murder investigation would NOT have been reopened. 

The thing is, for 7 years, from 2013 to 2021, there were ZERO leads. 

The mystery homeless man who showed up on the 7 year anniversary, was the first time anyone came forward claiming to know who the murderer was, but he was murdered 5 days later, and 2 days after that these 2 showed up with their wild tales of demons, aliens, haunted cars, etc.  

Interestingly, at the same time, YouTube got flooded with HUNDREDS of deep fake "Golden Eagle Haunted Car" AI generated videos, alongside TENS OF THOUSANDS of weird "anti-EelKat" Reddit posts spread across well over a hundred Reddit accounts. Which in turn caused my website to have a MEGA massive increase in traffic - with now over a million users per month, searching Google for the term "EelKat golden Eagle Ghost Car Wendy Allen Demon Car" (the keyword that Google Analytics says has sent the most traffic to my website since November 2021). In their weird slander attempt, and in making all these weird deep fake videos, and in posting all those weird Reddit posts, they have had an unexpected side effect of RAISING AWARENESS to my son's murder, by sending millions of people to my website. 

I don't do any marketing or promoting of my website, there is the URL painted on my car and the link from my FaceBook profile, together those each around two thousand people. 

This weird smear campaign these 2 have done since November 2021, has had a HUGE impact on traffic to my website. HUGE. With my site going from 10k average monthly visitors to over SEVEN MILLION average monthly visitors. 

This woman and the white haired man, in their mega hyper attempts to slander men, inadvertently caused people to start direct typing the word "EelKat" into Google search engine, which of course cause Google to give them eelkat.com as a search result. In their attempt to BURY all thoughts of my son's murder, by trying to spread crazy rumors about me, they instead caused the page about my son's murder to receive an average of over ONE MILLION NEW USERS visiting it, EACH MONTH since they stated yelling from porches around Biddeford in November 2021. 

Which in turn has also lead to more than one thousand people calling the police and FBI giving tips about my son's murder. 

So, in their attempt to make me look crazy, all they did was make themselves look very, very, VERY guilty, while spreading awareness about my son's murder to people who, before these two arrived on porched in Biddeford and Old Orchard, were unaware of my son's murder. 

But no, back to your question, I've never seen either of these two. I'm blind, remember? Blind since I was 4 years old. Blind from being beaten in the face with a limb from a pine tree. I have been blind for five decades.

And no, I've never spoken with either of them. I'm mute, remember? My jaw was fused shut, from the bone growing back wrong, after being beaten in the face with a cinder block brick, when I was 14 years old. I have been mute for four decades. I was 42 years old when doctors discovered I was not born mute, but was forcable made mute by "medical augmentation" aka torture. In June 2016, I had surgery to allow me to open my jaw properly for the first time in 40 years, but four decades mute, meant my vocal cords never grew properly, never received conditioning, and now today, I still can not speak properly, my voice is barely a whisper, IF I can even form vocalizations at all, which usually I can not. Because of this I have no physical ability to raise my voice at all, I can not scream or yell at all, I am physically, medically incapable of getting my voice to be anything other then a whisper, and even that causes searing pain, resulting in I don't bother trying to speak.

And no, I've not had contact with anyone. From 1983 until 2006 I was locked in a rusted racoon trap cage in a wood shed "room", and there were only 7 people who ever checked in on me that entire time, and they only did that once a week. Needless to say I never went to school. I had a typewriter, and my grandmother brought paper each week. I became very good at typing, because for 27 years, I had nothing else to do. 

October 2006 a bomb blew up that house. I almost died. Someone put the bomb in that "room" while I was asleep. From 2006 to 2015, I lived under a 8x9 tarp at the back of that wood shed.

Out of the entire of my more then five decades of life, I have only had contact with Humans for three years. From October 2010 to November 2013.

In October 2010 I went to the Old Orchard Beach High School and got my GED after 3 weeks of night classes. I got a ride to the DMV and got my driver's permit. Then I enrolled in two colleges York County Community College and Southern Maine Community College, taking five classes per semester. I could not enroll as a degree student because I do not know how to count or tell time or read clocks or calendars or do maths.

At SMCC, three professors (Andrew Parker, Robert Vettes, and Chris M) attempted to teach me how to speak. The SMCC student counselor brought in social workers and a state psychologist who diagnosed me as "a feral child" and stated I had no social skills on any level whatsoever due to what they termed "the most horrific case of child abuse and neglect ever seen in Maine history". They found my not knowing about things like eating utensils, bathing, or communicating verbally to be the worst case of "feral childism" in modern history.

A team of psychiatrists were brought to the college, over a dozen of the world's top child behavior specialists from countries all over the world: to do a study on the "training of a feral child" and to make "attempts to intergrade a feral child into modern American society". They called me an anomaly and a "once in a hundred years chance of a lifetime study subject".

Four of them predicted I would: never drive a car, never learn to talk, never make a single friend, never learn to interact with Humans, never learn to eat with a fork, and never learn  math. 

I became the "test subject" of more then a dozen "feral child studied" which lasted my entire time at college, and ended abruptly November 14, 2013, when a mystery woman who identified herself as "Claire" attacked with a golf club, murdering my baby and leaving me with a broken spine and paralyzed legs.

Even before I became bedridden in 2013, I could not walk unaided. My hip was stabbed with a foundation rod, that was driven through my right hip and out my left thigh. My Uncle Bruce did that when I was 4 years old. I've struggled to even stand, let alone walk, since I was FOUR years old. So being crippled, unable to walk, was not new. But my whole life, it was my hips, and now it is my spine, and a severed nerve bundle in my spinal column.

Since November 2013 I have been bedridden, and the ONLY way you can talk to me or see me is to visit me, visit my bed.

I can not see.

I can not talk.

I can not walk.

Since 2013 I am out of bed fewer then 2 hours a day. 

And NO ONE... not ONE SINGLE PERSON, ever visited me since 2013, or before.

The ONLY people who arrive are the ones who stand in the driveway and on the porch and yell obscenities and hate slurs from the street... and they are too far away for me to see them, and they are too far away for them to hear my whisper if I tried to talk, which I don't. Plus, I can not sit up, it takes well over an hour for me to sit up in my bed, so by the time I am sitting up, they are gone.

So, anyone telling you I have seen them, spoken with them, yelled at them, interacted with them, at ANY point prior to 1983... when I was locked in that cage ... is lying to you. Because since 1983, NO ONE but my husband Benjamin Kitchle Wildes, my grandmother Eva Viola Atwater, and my uncles Bruce, Dickie, & David, and my aunt Barbara has EVER underreacted with me at all. And the only interactions from Brice, David, Dickie, and Barbara was to electrocute me for the fun of watching me pass out, stabbing me with broken glass again for th e fun of it, and beating me with cinder block bricks because breaking the bones of children is funny according to them.

From October 2010 to November 2013, ar the ONLY three years of my life where I ever went outside and had interaction with Humans, and I was seen as so UN-human that 90% of my Human interactions was with psychiatrists who were giddy piss pants excited to have "a real live feral child oh boy!" to study.

So ANYONE telling you they have ever had ANY form of interactions with me EVER in my ENTIRE LIFE, if lying to you, because those interactions I just listed are the ONLY ones that have EVER happened. PERIOD.

You ask how I can remember everything everyone has ever done and said? Easy? Because so FEW people have ever done or said ANYTHING AT ALL, that it makes it each to remember EVERY ONE of them, for the very simple fact that there is literally not one other thing in my life to remember.

More then 99% of the hours of my life have been spent ALONE, in total darkness, in a cage, or alone, bed ridden in a bed, with no one saying ANYTHING to me, no one EVER interacting with me at all... and with fewer then two hundred total interactions with a Human in my ENTIRE LIFE, I am easily able to remember every single one of them.

Two days is the 10 year anniversary of the murder of my 8 month old son. The killer has not been found yet. Old Orchard Beach, Maine Police at 207-935-4911 and Portland Maine FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322 are investigating the murder of my son so, if you have any information, please give it to them. https://www.eelkat.com/Never-Forget.html 

If you ever made fun of or had any part in the murder of my son, your child shall die an equally horrible death. If you haven't got a child to lose, it will be a brother or sister or parents or spouse or whomever you love the most, and that you should know it was this curse which you brought upon yourself that killed them, they will die on exactly the 7 year anniversary of the very first time, you mocked the death of my child.

Where wee you on your 10th birthday?
I was here:

I was looked in this "room" in Old Orchard Beach, Maine for 27 years. From the time I was 8 years old, until I was 31... I escaped in 2010. That's why in 2013 these same people murdered my 8 month old son and crippled me, and drove a backhoe over my house. To punish me for escaping this room.

Where wee you on your 20th birthday?
I was here:

Where wee you on your 30th birthday?
I was here:

I was looked in this "room" in Old Orchard Beach, Maine for 27 years. From the time I was 8 years old, until I was 31... I escaped in 2010. That's why in 2013 these same people murdered my 8 month old son and crippled me, and drove a backhoe over my house. To punish me for escaping this room.

You never saw the room Ben and my mother kept me locked in for 27 years from the time I was 8 years old, the one Etiole used to break me out of? Well here you go, photos of it from the 2007 FBI and police reports, THIS is the "room", my mother designed it, my father built it, Bruce hired the priests of the Cape Elizabeth, Saco, and Sanford ward Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints to rape me in it... from the time i was 8 until 12, when Ben aka the High Priest came along and declared I was his and from the time i was 12 until 31 Ben kept me in this room only allowing me out on Sundays to attend church. still wonder why I hate the Atwaters? When I was 37 years old the FBI showed up and started the investigation into the trafficking ring the Atwaters ran out of 37 Smithwheel Road and 144 Portland Ave, Maine, this room was a pivotal piece of evidence that was roped off and no one allowed in it because of the FBI investigation... that's why the backhoe that ran over this room August 8, 2013 is such a very big importance... THIS room is what the backhoe was trying to hide. Look close at the floor, you can see the bones of the children who didn't survive.

I'm a survivor of adults who thought selling children to priests was a good income and this room was the biggest piece of evidence the FBI had until the backhoe drove over the house and carried off the remained, doing the biggest tampering of evidence of a fucking murder investigation ... that's WHY the backhoe drove over the house, because the Atwaters were desperate to hide the evidence of this rooms existence, and that's WHY they started the alien abduction hoax about me and Etiole because they thought if they destroyed the room and gaslighted me by spread alien abduction rumors, they thought they could convince everyone i was crazy for saying i was locked in this room for 27 years... but they didn't know before they did that, that the FBI had already been in the room and has HUNDREDS of photos of every inch of it. It was not the only place like this. These Atwater run child trafficking "rooms" have been found in twenty-one states. The FBI has shut down 14 of these child trafficking rings run by the Atwaters. If you support the Atwaters in any way, THIS is what you are supporting. When you send money to an Atwater run fund raiser, you funding building more rooms like this one. That's what they do with your hard earned money. Rooms like this, where small children, are raped and starved. And because the children have no birth records, no ID, they live and die without a paper trail. They exist to be raped daily, until they have their first period and risk getting pregnant, and they the room is locked not to be opened again, until they starve to death. Most die before their 12th birthday.

I'm a survivor, and I survived because of Etiole, because while HUNDREDS of people in Old Orchard Beach, Maine knew of this room, used this room, he was the only person with the moral decency to be horrified by this room and try to stand up to the Atwaters, and try the help the children. He used to break in and try to rescue me. Took me out into the swamps of the Ross Forest. But the Atwaters always found me and took me back.

To discredit me, when I was 14 years old, and escaped to the local police and tried to get help, the Atwaters made up a terrible story: they lied to the police. They told the police, there was no room, and Etiole was a figment of my imagination, they called him a demon at first, and later they called him an alien. The Atwaters spread a horrific lie, telling people that I was an alien abductee. And depending on WHICH Atwater you talked to the story changed wildly: sometimes Etiole was a evil spirit, other times a cryptid, other times a demon, but most often "The Amphibious Alien". 

We had a neighbor back in the 1970s, his name was Stephen King, he wrote about us. My Gypsy family, my car, me, and Etiole. He filmed two movies on our farm, but never once tried to help the children he wrote about. He never tried to help us children, even though his books and movies today exist as evidence that he was well aware of this room and Etiole. Instead, he profited off of our pain and suffering, while 120 of those children were saw up and their bones dumped in the Goosefare Broke Ravine in the Reclaim Blueberry Plains of the Ross Forest of Old Orchard Beach, Maine... bones confiscated by the FBI in June 2016, which led to the arrest of many of the child traffickers at 37 Smithwheel Rod, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, that same year. 

Meanwhile The Atwaters continued to spread their lies about me and Etile, contacting hundreds of alien and UFO and cryptid organizations telling them I was abducted by aliens and Etiole was that alien. Only I have no clue what they were doing and I had never heard of the concept of aliens or cryptids or UFOs, and so I had no clue what MUFON and the UFO nuts were talking about, when they showed up on my farm to interview me and try to catch Etiole, calling him an EBE.

There are no aliens.

There are no demons.

There are no evil spirits.

There are no haunted cars.

There was just this room, and the children raped by Mormon priests... Mormon Priests, known as The Atwaters... Mormon Priests who invented the urban myth of a haunted car and a child abducted by aliens, for one reason, and one reason only: to make the children crazy, if those children ever dared tell people about this room.

Rooms like the one at 144 Portland Ave, 146 Portland Ave, and 37 Smithwheel Road, exist all over the State of Maine, and the 3 the FBI shut down in Old Orchard Beach, ran from the 1950s until 2016. I was put in this room in 1983. That's why I have no knowledge of any world event, any movie, and TV show, and books, anything that occurred between 1983 and 2010.

ALL of the children who survived these rooms, ALL of them, have been slandered the same way the Atwaters slandered me and Etiole. Each with stories of aliens and demons. Thirty-one of those survivors, have commit suicide, all who escaped, killed themselves within 3 years because of the alien abduction lies the Atwaters spread about them, alien abduction lies that are no different then the alien abduction lies the Atwaters spread about me and Etiole.

Yes, I am EelKat, Etiole’s friend, but I don’t know why you call me that, because it’s the other way around. He was my friend. He was my ONLY friend. He was the only person in this godforsaken town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine, who did not value money or sex over the lives of children.

There are ONE group of people who call me an alien abductee. The Atwaters and their evil, child raping church group. They call me an alien abductee, simple as a gaslighting method, of trying to make me sound crazy, so you won’t look at what they are doing to children. They try to make all the children they torture look crazy, so that no one will believe the child when child tells an adult about the rooms or the rape. Trust NO ONE who calls me an alien abductee, because THEY are involved in a very big child trafficking ring.

I am not an alien abductee and I never claimed to be, and if anyone ever told you I was, you should look at them with suspicion and ask what they did, that they are trying to make you look somewhere else, to not see what they are doing.

There are ONE group of people who call Etiole an alien. The Atwaters and their evil, child raping church group. They call him an alien, simple as a gaslighting method, of trying to make me sound crazy, when I was 8 years old said an old man broke into the room and took me into the swamps; they call him an alien so you won’t look at what they are doing to children. They try to make all the children they torture look crazy, so that no one will believe the child when child tells an adult about the rooms or the rape. Trust NO ONE who calls Etiole an alien, because THEY are involved in a very big child trafficking ring.

Etiole is not an alien and I never said he was, and if anyone ever told you he was, you should look at them with suspicion and ask what they did, that they are trying to make you look somewhere else, to not see what they are doing.

He is a local homeless French Jewish man, whom I let sleep in my car on rainy nights so that he can stay dry. Retarded locals think he is a demon or alien or whatever else they call him, because he is covered in scars and burns and Kabalic tattoos and number tattoos from being a concentration camp survivor from WW2.

You can see video footage of his living conditions:

HERE

and HERE

and HERE. These videos where filmed in 2022

As you can see from the videos, this homeless man whom my sick jackass Uncle Bruce has spent DECADES harassing, has NOTHING, he LITERALLY is living in a hole he dug with his fingernails, in the sand under a fallen tree, and you can see from these videos WHY I let him sleep in my car, and WHY the shit heads of Old Orchard Beach and Biddeford Maine who are harassing this homeless man, calling him a cryptid, calling him an alien, calling him an evil spirit, are scumbag pieces of shit who don't deserve the life god gave them.

The Atwaters and their church group are evil, and if you believe their lies about me or Etiole, then you've fallen for their scam, just like they wanted you to do.

There is right now, in October of 2023, a group of people actively going to houses, store, bars, and restaurants throughout Biddeford and Old Orchard Beach, randomly approaching total strangers and and saying "Have you heard about EelKat?" And then going on some spiel involving wild radical tales of demons, aliens, haunted cars, cats, about 40 people near as we can tell, led by an elderly white haired man who drives a dark green pick up truck and a very fat, extremely morbidly obese blond woman about late 30s/early 40s, who people in the area have dubbed "porch bitch" because she goes from porch to porch all over Biddeford screaming from strangers' porches to walkers on the sidewalk, always screaming "Have you head about EelKat?" usually referencing also my Volvo. The FBI believes these two to be the husband and daughter of the woman who murdered my son. If you know who the white haired man or "porch bitch" are, the FBI is actively seeking information about their identity.

I am legally blind, I have never seen either of these people, so I do not know what they look like, I only know what witnesses are telling me they looked like when they showed up at their homes. I also have Kannar's Syndrome, real and actual (non-verbal, low functioning) Autism (not to be confused with high functioning Aspergers; I am only able to communicate by typing, and so here I am, typing, so I am unable to verbally respond to what these people are telling me. I have agoraphobia so, it is often months between me setting foot outside, but I am crippled with a broken spine from the November 14, 2013 attack of the golf club woman who crippled me when she murdered me son and thus I also can not get out of bed or stand up unaided. I do not know who either porch bitch or the white haired man these people are telling me is approaching them are. My son's murderer whom also crippled me, she I can identify if she ever got close enough again, but these two people whom are suspected of being her husband and daughter, I have not seen and can not identify. When you come to me and tell me they have approached you, you do nothing useful or helpful. I can not take YOUR testimony to the police or FBI, because it is YOUR testimony, not mine. YOU have to tell the POLICE and FBI what these people did. Do not come to me and tell me, because other then post this message here, there is nothing else I can do with the information you have provided.

There is some speculation that porch bitch may in fact live in my apartment building here at 409 Main Street in Biddeford, but I have lived here since February 2019, and of the 9 other families here, only one of them has lived here longer than me. Between the 9 families in our building, there are more then people living in this building and to date, I have met none of them.

Initially I had tried to introduce myself to each family in this building however, they are white and I am not, they are Christians and I am Moron/Voodoo, and this Maine where hatred of all things not white and not Christian are at their worst in the entire country.

White hatred for us Gypsies is very bad here in Maine and many in my family have been beaten, tortured, and murdered by the white Christians of Maine.

Does porch bitch live in our building? I do not know. But many witnesses are now saying they have seen her going in and out of the building, so she either lives here or knows someone who does.

With the extreme anti-Gypsy animosity and anti-Pagan animosity the 9 families who live at 409 Main Street have shown my family since we moved in here on February 2019, I would not be at all surprised if porch bitch not only lived here but the others know it, know what she is doing to my family and are not reporting it to the police simply because, that's what white people do to us non-whites.

Interestingly, witnesses are saying they believe the white haired man with the big green Dodge Ram pickup truck, lives on Portland Ave, very near my farm.

It is deeply disturbing, if this is true, because that means porch bitch and the white haired man are doing very severe levels of stalking, because my family has lived at 146 Portland Ave Old Orchard Beach since the 1530s, we settled and founded the town, and in 2019 when I moved into this apartment in Biddeford, no one else lived in this building, other then the gay couple who are still here and the only ones here longer than me. And also in 2019, there was no white haired man living near me on Portland Ave. 

This means, the man suspected of being "Clair's husband and the woman suspected of being "Claire's" daughter, Claire being the name the woman who murdered my son, called herself, have moved in next door to BOTH of my addresses within the last 3 years.

Claire used a golf club to beat my 8 month old son's head in with. If you are protecting Claire, know that THAT is the sort of child murdering bitch you are defending.

Claire's identity is the one we want. We want to know who she is. In 2021 a homeless man showed up in my driveway, claiming he knew who Claire was... 2 days later he was dead on the train tracks and splattered across the back of my house, and 2 days after that, this porch bitch woman showed up. We don't know who any of these people are, not the homeless man, not porch bitch, not Claire. We only got the name Claire, because that's what the bald man with her,November 14, 2013, the day she murdered my son, that's what he called her, and she answered him to that name, like it was her real name.

The Claire who murdered my son, she's who we are looking for... and apparently we got really close in 2021, because that's when porch bitch showed up with her wild alien/demon/cat slander, and she's working over time spreading her slander as far and as wide as she can, making it damn clear, she's scared shitless of us finding out who Claire is.

So, NOW, the FBI is not just asking for information about Claire's identity, they now want the identity of both Biddeford's porch bitch and Old Orchard Beach's white haired elderly man driving the mega, big 2ton dark green Dodge Ram pick up.

These 2 people closing in on my family, DAYS after a witness came forward saying he knew who Claire was, a witness who died 2 days later, before the FBI agents had a chance to talk to him... this is terrifying for my family, and it's deeply disturbing.

Porch bitch and her friends are terrorizing my family. And less then a month ago they killed my dog Mickey. There is something wrong with these people. These are NOT good people.

This is very, very deeply disturbing.

This makes them, in addition to everything else: stalkers.

Keep in mind too, porch bitch is the woman who poisoned and killed my dog Mickey only a few weeks ago. And one week before she poisoned and killed my dog, Mickey, she showed up at PortCon 2023, with a gang of about 12 others, at Round 1 in the Maine Mall, and tried to kill me, by peeling back the cheese on my pizza and loading it up with onions, something I am deadly allergic to. I would have been dead within 15 minutes had I eaten it. Porch bitch is dangerous. And she wants me dead. And she thinks nothing of killing my pets. She's proven that much.

There are HUNDREDS of people throughout Biddeford and Old Orchard Beach contacting me, both online and in person offline, telling me that these people approached them at random. They appear to be hellbent on approaching every single person to set foot in either town, so if you are in Biddeford or Old Orchard Beach you'll likely encounter them sooner or later if you haven't already. They appear to have been doing this since around May 2021, but so far no one knows who they are.

One detail though: porch bitch, has been saying some very specific information about the murder that was NEVER made public, and is not in the police public access report, it's only in the FBI's classified report. The ONLY person who knows this detail is the murderer herself, and porch bitch is too young to be the murderer. The blond golf club woman who attacked me November 14, 2013, was in her late 60s to early 70s, she'd be in her late 70s or early 80s today. Porch bitch is young enough to be her daughter or granddaughter. But porch bitch has been saying information that ONLY the murderer would know, so porch bitch DOES have personal contact with my son's murderer and is probably dangerous herself.

She has information that was never released to the public. Information the police and fbi kept out of public access reports. Information that was kept classified so it could be used to identify the murderer. Information she could only get, from the murderer. She is using 27 Facebook accounts and over 100 Reddit accounts to post that information as far and wide as possible, while gathering up a large group from the Sanford ward church to go around Biddeford and Old Orchard Beach also spreading that classified information, while at the same time spreading the rumors and lies that I am an alien Abducted and Etiole is an alien, while also spreading rumors of my cars being haunted, while also making hundreds of deep fake videos on YouTube about me and my cars and Etiole. She is orchestrating a huge defamation slander smear campaign, which you have seen some of the videos about me and my car. Fbi believes she is the daughter of the golf club bitch who murdered my baby and is doing this because Tod Murphy told the FBI his mother was bragging to be the golf club woman. Porch bitch showed up same time Tod Murphy did, in fall of 2021. The Sanford ward people joined her around May 2022. Fbi is currently investigating every one connected to the Sandford ward, and they now believe the golf club woman to have been a member in 2013. You don't have full details of what porch bitch is doing, who is helping her, and how alarmingly large scale what she is doing is, simply because I can not give you full details. There is a lot of information about porch bitch and her crew that I've not said, things the FBI and police are aware of, and you the general public, don't need to be aware of.

These people are actively and deliberately making a massive attempt to compromise an FBI murder investigation, alongside huge levels of victim shaming.

Porch bitch clearly knows who the murderer is, and the FBI is looking for ANY information you have that leads to identifying porch bitch, because arresting porch bitch, is right now, the #1 best chance of also finding and arresting my son's killer.

If you have any information about any of these events, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

Never forget: my son was murdered. That's what they want you to forget. They make up crazy rumors and lies because they want you to think about something, anything OTHER then my son's murder. And the ONLY person with THAT motive, is the golf club wielding blond woman, and anyone who is trying to cover up her crimes.

They want you to forget my son was murdered.

Clearly porch bitch is scared shitless that the killer, someone she knows, will be arrested soon, or she wouldn't be so hyper vigilant in her mega extreme slander campaign going on in Biddeford, Maine right now.

Beware of ANYONE who calls Etiole an alien, for he is not an alien and they are lying to you about him, as a slight of hand means of misdirection, to turn you away from seeing their own crimes.

Beware of anyone who tells you I believe in aliens, for I do not, and they are lying to you in a gaslighting technique meant to keep you from noticing the crimes they commited.

Trust no one who tells you I cast curses or consort with demons, for I do neither, and they say these things to you out of malicious motives, to make you look at anything other than themselves. They don't want you to see the sins they do, so they spread wild and bizarre rumors about me and an elderly homeless veteran, in a magicians pallor trick of misdirection. They use me and Etiole as their smoke and mirrors, so that you are looking the other way, while they get away with heinous crimes.

Beware of anyone who calls me a witch, for I am a Mormon, 5th generation, and we Mormons do not believe in witchcraft.

I need not tell you their names, for by their own actions, they will reveal themselves to you.

Pay very close attention to anyone who approaches you to "warn you" about EelKat... because remember too, my name is not EelKat. My name is Wendy Christine Allen. EelKat is a fictional character, a talking back fairy cat, from a Space Fantasy novel. Miss Citten The Eel Kat is Empress of Planet Ptarmagin and she travels to distant galaxies in a star ship, collecting deep space eels from other planets, her name is unpronounceable, so people call her "The Eel Kat" because she is the cat who has pet eels. The book was titled "Friends Are Forever" and it was published in 1978. You have to be severely mentally disabled in order to think that a talking space cat from a Fantasy novel is real, let alone be crazy enough to think that the author is that character. The very fact alone that porch bitch refers to ME as EelKat, that alone tells you the deeply disturbed fantasy prone mental case we are dealing with her. Her inability to discern fiction from reality, and he belief that I, a real person, an EelKat, a fictional space cat from a novel, or her belief that a local homeless veteran, is an alien, or her belief that my Dodge or my Volvo are demon possessed, that alone tells you what type of incredibly dangerous psychopath porch bitch really is. 

You can see video footage of his living conditions:

HERE

and HERE

and HERE.

THAT is the homeless veteran, this woman is calling an alien or a demon, depending on which delusion she is babble that day. THAT is Etoile. THAT is how he lives. THAT is who this deplorable woman is harassing.

Pay very close attention to anyone who approaches you to "warn you" about EelKat or otherwise tries to convince you I have anything to do with aliens, demons, curses, or witches, for they are deceiving you, and they do so, to draw your attention away from themselves. 

Never forget, my son was murdered on November 14, 2013, and the killer still walks free, and anyone telling you anything about aliens, demons, curses, or witches, has one goal and one goal only: a flagrant attempt to discredit me, and protect my son's murderer.

They ONLY want you to think about aliens to make you forget my son was murdered.

The FBI is looking for my son's killer AND the identity of the people who are trying to hinder their investigation.

If anyone approaches you and tells you Etiole is an alien CALL FBI Agent Andy Drewer and tell him who they are. They ONLY want you to think about aliens to make you forget my son was murdered.

Never forget, November 14, 2023 will be the 10 year anniversary of the November 14, 2013 murder of my 8 month old infant son, at BugLight Lighthouse Art Studio of Southern Maine Community College in South Portland, Maine. If you have any information about who his killer is, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322 

If anyone approaches you and tells you that I believe in aliens CALL FBI Agent Andy Drewer and tell him who they are. They ONLY want you to think about aliens to make you forget my son was murdered. 

Never forget, November 14, 2023 will be the 10 year anniversary of the November 14, 2013 murder of my 8 month old infant son, at BugLight Lighthouse Art Studio of Southern Maine Community College in South Portland, Maine. If you have any information about who his killer is, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

If anyone approaches you and tells you Etiole is a demon CALL FBI Agent Andy Drewer and tell him who they are. They ONLY want you to think about demons to make you forget my son was murdered. 

Never forget, November 14, 2023 will be the 10 year anniversary of the November 14, 2013 murder of my 8 month old infant son, at BugLight Lighthouse Art Studio of Southern Maine Community College in South Portland, Maine. If you have any information about who his killer is, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322 

If anyone approaches you and tells you that I believe in demons CALL FBI Agent Andy Drewer and tell him who they are. They ONLY want you to think about demons to make you forget my son was murdered.

Never forget, November 14, 2023 will be the 10 year anniversary of the November 14, 2013 murder of my 8 month old infant son, at BugLight Lighthouse Art Studio of Southern Maine Community College in South Portland, Maine. If you have any information about who his killer is, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

If anyone approaches you and tells you that I cast curses CALL FBI Agent Andy Drewer and tell him who they are. They ONLY want you to think about curses to make you forget my son was murdered. 

Never forget, November 14, 2023 will be the 10 year anniversary of the November 14, 2013 murder of my 8 month old infant son, at BugLight Lighthouse Art Studio of Southern Maine Community College in South Portland, Maine. If you have any information about who his killer is, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

If anyone approaches you and tells you that I am a witch CALL FBI Agent Andy Drewer and tell him who they are. They ONLY want you to think about witches to make you forget my son was murdered. 

Never forget, November 14, 2023 will be the 10 year anniversary of the November 14, 2013 murder of my 8 month old infant son, at BugLight Lighthouse Art Studio of Southern Maine Community College in South Portland, Maine. If you have any information about who his killer is, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

They are going out of their way to try to make you forget my son died, by coming up with ludicrous tales of aliens and demons. And the ONLY person with ANY motive to do that, is the blond woman who murdered my son.

They want you to forget my son was murdered.

NEVER FORGET!

Never forget, November 14, 2023 will be the 10 year anniversary of the November 14, 2013 murder of my 8 month old infant son, at BugLight Lighthouse Art Studio of Southern Maine Community College in South Portland, Maine. If you have any information about who his killer is, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

They are going out of their way to try to make you forget my son died, by coming up with ludicrous tales of aliens and demons. And the ONLY person with ANY motive to do that, is the blond woman who murdered my son.

NEVER FORGET!

My Answer:
On the topic of writing Medieval Servants:
Their jobs and their place in historical fiction.

Oh my! Medieval history. One of my favourite subjects! This is a great question.

My first question to is is going to be this:

Are you SURE you mean Medieval?

Are you sure you do not mean Baroque?

MOST times when someone says "Medieval princess" or "Medieval castle" or "Medieval fantasy" what they ACTUALLY have in mind is "Baroque princess" or "Baroque castle" or "Baroque fantasy."

Now, because you SAID Medieval, I'm going to answer you with ACTUAL Medieval history facts.

However, should you realize while reading this that Medieval is nothing close to what you ACTUALLY had in mind, then I highly recommend you try researching Baroque and possibly Rococo history, as, more likely then not, what you had in mind was a Baroque or Rococo princess, living in a Baroque or Rococo castle.

The difference is over 1,000 years, with your Medieval princess, a 10 year child old being chained in the cow shed outside of the stone hut (castle) in the 600s were she is fucked multiple times a day by her father to ensure she gives him a son and will be flogged is she dares commit the sin of giving birth to her sister instead of her brother, while the Baroque princess a pampered pouty teenager, has a bevee of servants powdering her nose in her glamorous fairy tale princess style tower palace in the 1600s.

The average person today, if they had to live even a few hours in Medieval lifestyle would not survive. Medieval lifestyle, especially for a princess, was harsh, disgusting, degrading, and brutal.

There are several things to consider, the biggest of them being: When you say Medieval, do you actually mean real historically accurate Medieval? Or the quasi-fantasy Medieval as told in Robin Hood, King Arthur and his knights of the round table in Camelot, and Lord of the Rings? I ask this because there is a difference, a big difference, a huge difference. Very little of Robin Hood, King Arthur, or LOTR has any basis in reality, keeping in mind that the oldest of these books was written in the 1700s, nearly a 1,000 years after Medieval times had ended. Keep in mind too, that the movies based on these books are even less historically accurate than the books are. These stories are of the genre known as Medieval Fantasy. Note the word “fantasy” after “Medieval”. Medieval Fantasy is not based on anything even close to Medieval fact.

Also, what most people think of as "Medieval princess" is often based off of Disney's Cinderella, which is the Baroque or Rococo Period of the 1700s and is a far cry from being Medieval.

In nearly every case I've ever encountered of a "Medieval princess" in a "Medieval castle" in a novel, it's almost always the Baroque (1650 to 1700) or Rococo (1700 to 1780) time period that they are actually referring to, which is well over a 1,000 years AFTER the Medieval time period ended.

In Medieval fantasy you see servant dressing the princess daily, helping her change clothes for every meal. Real Medieval princesses did not change their clothes morning, noon, and night like you see in the movies, they didn’t even change their clothes daily, heck, they were not likely to have even changed their clothes weekly. In real Medieval times people had: a summer outfit, a winter outfit, and a church services outfit.

People did not change clothes daily, slept in their cloths, and wore many, many, many layers.

Let's think about bread for a minute.

Bread is a good way to show medieval life for what it was.

1. White bread was invented by the Wonder Bread company in the 1950s. At no point before the 1950s will anyone see white bread.
2. Long skinny rectangular loaves of sliced bread also did not exist before the 1950s.
3. Bread was a ball shape, baked on a board, not in a pan.
4. Slices of bread used in making sandwiches, were 3 or 4 inches thick each slice.
5. Sandwiches are a Victorian invention. They did not exist prior to the 1830s.
6. They did not put butter on their bread in medieval times. 
7. Butter was still rare in Victorian times. 
8. Prior to the 1970s and the invention of Parkey, only the super wealthy had access to butter.
9. Lard (bacon fat drippings) is what was spread on bread slices, often an inch or more thick.
10. Bread was eaten with cheese and wine, not butter and juice or water.
11. Cheese was not slices. It was large chunks and wedges.
12. To eat bread and cheese, you put one very large hunk of bread in one hand and one very large wedge of cheese in the other, then alternated taking bites out of each.
13. Wine was drunk by everyone, every meal, even by children, because wine was safer to drink then water.
14. Juice was almost never drunk at all, because refrigeration did not exist until the 1920s and juice will start to ferment (turn into wine) with-in an hour of being made if it is not refrigerated.
15. Flour to make bread was large grained and chunky. Thus bread was tough, chewy, and full of whole grains. A loaf was very heavy, like a brick and weighed several pounds.
16. Before the 1950s, bread did not resemble the light, fluffy, airy item we think of as bread today.
17. Because the average person did not have access to eating meat, it was common place to collect maggots, caterpillars, beetles, and grub (beetle larvae) to add to bread dough and cook into your bread. 
18. Because hunger and malnutrition was common place, children often fought over who got the slice of bread that contained the most bugs, as this was the slice that provided the best meal.
19. Meat was a very rare luxury, eaten only on Holy Days such as Easter and Christmas, in medieval times.
20. The price of chicken (dead to cook) in medieval times, was the equivalent of buying a new car today.
21. A man had to save money for as long as a year, to be able to afford to by a leg of lamb for his family for Easter dinner.
22. Meat livestock was very rare.
23. No farmer killed sheep for food, because wool was too valuable.
24. No farmer killed chicken for food, because eggs were too valuable.
25. No farmer killed cows or goats for food, because milk was too valuable.
26. If they had meat on the table it was rats, rabbits, mice, crows, blackbirds, sparrows, squirrels, ermine, mink, turtles, and fish.
27. Only Pagans ate pigs. Christians, Jews, and Muslims did not because they believed God would send them to Hell if they did.
28. The Bible says not to eat pigs. Medieval people strictly adhered to Bible laws.
29. If by chance a cow, sheep, goose, or chicken died, the family did not eat the meat, but sold it to nobels, as a single chicken averaged 300 silver coins (10 years income).
30. The only parts of the animal the family kept to eat was the brain, tongue, and intestines  which were ground together to make sausage (aka haggis)
31. The bulk of the medieval diet was bread, cheese, and root crops (potatoes, carrots, beets, turnips, and onions.)
32. How often in "medieval" novels and movies do you see people drinking apple cider?
33. Apples were not discovered until the 1640s.
34. How often in "medieval" novels and movies do you see people coking with, picking, or throwing tomatoes?
35. How often are tomatoes described as "Italian" and Italian medieval people show making tomato sauce for pasta?
36. Tomatoes were not discovered until the 1640s. Tomato sauce was invented in New York in the 1930s as a result of the invention of canned food.
37. Ever seen medieval travellers in Fantasy roasting their corn or making cornbread on their open camp fire?
38. How often do medieval travelers in Fantasy toss things like green string beans or peas into their stew?
39. They did not have tomatoes, apples, corn, green string beans, or squash in Europe at all, as these were all items native to America which was still 500 years from being discovered.
40. Ever seen a mediaval traveller in fantasy novel eating his baked beans?
41. Baked beans were invented in Colonial Boston, around the time of the Boston Tea Party (late 1700s, just before 1776)
42. Medieval times started at the year 1.A.D. with the birth of Jesus the Christ.
43. Medieval times ended in the 1300s.
44. What "Historical Fiction" and "Medieval Fantasy" novelists inaccurately call "medieval times" is nearly always the 1600s to 1700s. Once in a rare while they might use things from as early as the 1500s.
45. How often are medieval people on ships? Big pirate ships? In Fantasy novels?
46. Did you know in 1492, long after medieval times were over, that Chris Columbus had the largest sailing ship ever built and it was 21 feet long?
47. Did you also know that the 1959 Cadillac is 23 feet long? 
48. Or that The World's Most Haunted Car is 21 feet long, the exact same size as the Nina, the Pinta, and the Santa Maria?
49. Did you know that Dutchman, the type of boat that is favored by pirates of pirate movies, was not invented until the 1740s?
50. Boy did we get a long way from bread...

Male servants were often well paid. A female servant was usually nothing more than a lesser wife who was set charge over taking care of the favorite wives. The princess was likely a favorite wife of the king, even though the king was also her father, otherwise she would be a servant in the house and not a princess. The job of the queen and princesses were to have as many babies as possible in hopes that a male heir would survive to adulthood. (Keeping in mind that 9 out of every 10 babies died before they reached the age of 3 and babies were not named until after they had reached their 3rd birthday and proved they were hardy stock.) The primary job of a princess’ personal servant was to hold her down while the king raped her. Most princess’ died in childbirth before they reached the age of 14, most would have had 4 or 5 pregnancies by the time they reached 14. This is the way it was done in actual Medieval times.

In any case, from what you said in your question, it is unlikely that you are looking for historically accurate information on either your princess or her servants.

What if she's a princess and doesn't have much in the way of a kingdom/palace/wealth/etc? She doesn't want her people to know so she keeps up appearance by having a servant still, even though she can't really afford one, thus the servant, being the only servant, has to do EVERYTHING. As a general rule the more wealth they had the more servants they had, and a single personal servant would be highly unusual in Medieval times, which is why I suggested this.

Medieval servants were often indebted slaves, so they were working off a debt they owed, and often were poorly treated, because they were basically seen as deadbeats who couldn't be trusted to pay off a loan. Often, being a servant to a noble in Medieval times was not a good thing to be.

Not all servants were indebted slaves. In wealthy families servants were more likely to be paid staff, however you did not ask about wealthy families, you asked about a princess, specifically, and in a royal family there would have been a higher rate of indebted slaves than paid servants. Indebted servants would have been placed in the harder jobs however: tending the farms and washing clothing. House servants, especially those being asked to cook the meals or care for family members one-on-one would have been paid staff who were loyal and well trusted. So the servants working one-on-one with the princess would likely have been with the family many years, and be well paid.

There would be few historically accurate cases of a princess having a single servant doing her bidding. Perhaps if she is traveling and can only take one servant with her, again, the one servant must do everything.

You seem to be referring to a footman, who was a man hired to wait on the princess hand and foot and do whatever she asked, whenever she asked, all day and night. He would never leave her side, from the time she was born until the day she died, and if he outlived her he would tend her grave until he died. He would also be a Eunuch: a castrated male who dresses as a woman. This was done to ensure 2 things: #1 he'd never rape her or otherwise be tempted to take sexual advantage of her, and #2 being a male he'd never feel the need to compete with her (female servants had a history of being snooty and disobedient when placed on 24 hour duty for a princess). Thus when you see nurses like the one Maid Marion has in Robin Hood, in real life that nurse would have been a castrated man cross-dressing as a woman and not an actual woman. Again, do not trust the movies - in the movies Maid Marion's nurse is always played by a female actor, while a historically accurate movie would have had a male actor play the nurse.

In Medieval times no one washed floors. Of course most people did not have floors to wash, either. Not even a king's castle is going to have boards covering the dirt, though they might lay down hay and put tapestries and carpets over the hay, but this would likely only be done in bed chambers, and the bed chamber in most cases, was not a separate room, but rather a corner in the kitchen that was divided off by a curtain. In fact, it was unlikely the castle would have more then one big giant room.

And if you are thinking: But it's a castle. It'll be 5 stoeies tall, with 500 rooms, and with torrents and towers....

Wait... are you sure you know what the MEDIEVAL times are? They rarely had floorboards in a Medieval castle, because they were only small single story stone huts. No towers. No torrents. If there was a tower, it'd have been one of those wooden types that is basically a pole with a plank on top. Medieval times had a FEW big buildings, but they were owned by the Catholic church, not kings. The Templar Knights had mega sized mansion style castles. The Popes and Cardinals and Bishops had mega sized Castles.

Kings? 

Kings had no power save the power the Pope gave him. Kings rarely had a house any bigger than anyone else in his tribe. Keeping in mind that a city rarely had more the 10 or 12 families, unless it was a metropolis like Rome or Bethlehem. 10 or 12 families could often exceed 200 people as well, with each wife having 10 or more children and each man making sure each of his 10 or 12 daughters gave birth to 10 or 12 more children, and why stop with hi daughters? He'll be fucking his grand daughters soon as they are 10 years old to. Such is the life of a Medieval princess, whose only job was to give the king as many babies as possible in hopes a son would reach adulthood to take his place when he died at the ancient old age of 30.

For "civilized" folk, Medieval men were rather savage. And the Era was called the "Dark Ages" by folks looking back at them, because they were pretty dark.

Now every day family men were often not like this, but you asked about a royal family. Royal families were obsessed with remaining the royal family. Thus the obsession with kings fucking as many of his daughters as possible, as often as possible, in his obsessive panic to make sure he had a son and the family didn't lose it's title.

The common folk, didn't have sur names. Only royalty had those. So common folk were not doing the rape you daughter as often as possible thing. Thu it was not common practice for EVERYONE, just common practice among the aristocrats who were overly obsessed with their pure blue blood.

What was we last saying? 

Floor boards, and lack thereof...yes...

Yes, big castles and floor boards existed in Medieval times, but they were rare and not many kings had one. They were reserved to church men not noble men, in Medieval times. Renaissance times is when you saw kings with big castles.

You got to remember, in Medieval time, the belief was that the Pope "was God on Earth", and thus required a castle to live in, so God could live in the Pope on Earth, without being contaminated by vile disgusting Humans. It took a lot of slave several decades to build the mega sized castles that housed God's conduit on Earth.

Yes, these castles were BIG... the biggest one, was so big that the building itself was declared a city. We know that mega sized castle today as "The Vatigan". It's the current Pope's house. Yes, His house is so big, it was declared a city.

So yes, Medieval castles could be monstrous, but any king who dared have a castle bigger then the local church leader, risked being beheaded by said church leader so said church leader could confiscate his house.

As a general rule, Medieval kings were nothing but puppets of the Church and had no say in law making, no rights, no freedom, and were simply expected to collect taxes from the people to give to the Church.

Do not confuse Medieval with Renaissance. Most so called “Medieval” movie settings are actually Renaissance settings. Most “Medieval” castles and manor houses seen in movies are actually Renaissance castles and manor houses.

A common thing in Medieval times was to lay down reeds or hay or grass on the floor, and change that every few days as needed. As needed often meaning, when it began to stink from the goats or dogs having peed in it too many times. Goats and dogs often being kept in the house.

Servants would be changing slop buckets (pans of piss and poo that sat beside the bed), and this job often meant simple dumping the bucket out the bedroom window onto the ground below (this is why moats were built - a moat was trench around the building which caught rain water and washed the sewerage away from the building.) Any house could have a moat, it didn't have to be the king's castle to have a moat, of course most kings didn't have castles either, most just had the biggest hut in the village - often with walls made of stones instead of sticks, and a thicker straw roof to keep out rain better than in the other huts.

Poorer families, who did not have a moat, had to carry their slop buckets out of the house and to the town/city slop pile, which often could be smelt from the house, even if they did not live in sight of it and had to walk some distance to get to it.

Castles were rarely as big as what you see in movies. One only has to visit a few castles in Ireland and Scotland today, to realize that the average castle was only 20 feet to 30 feet square. Most bedrooms in today's houses are larger then the entire footprint of a castle. The only reason a castle was "a castle" was because of how it was built. Castles were made of stone and had 2 walls... basically a stone wall around a stone house. Anyone could have a castle. It did not require being a king. It simply required living on land with enough stones and owning enough slaves to do the labor. Freemen, Lords, Dukes, Chiefs, Bishops, Merchants, and other men of some importance or wealth could easily afford to buy/rent/etc land and build a castle. Bondsmen, Knights, etc, could also do so granted their Lord's permission.

Heck, a poor family in an especially rocky area, off the beaten path, out of sight of the ruling lords, could build themselves a small castle. A man and 2 or 3 sons could build one in under a month's time. Depending on where they lived (country, region, and time period) they could do so without ever getting caught or get caught and end up facing huge penalties for doing so without permission if the Lord of the region discovered them there or be granted to stay in exchange for service and taxes. A mean Lord might send them to prison for "stealing" his land. It depends on the ruler himself and the region he's in. Different places had different ways of dealing with it.

Typically stone houses (castles) were reserved for the most important families in the region, the one who it was deemed being most worthy of being in need of protecting should enemies invade.

In any case, castles were not reserved only for kings and rarely was a castle any bigger then the average 2 bedroom house of today's time period. Few had towers. Few housed more then one family. Few were more then 1 storey. Few were more then 30 feet square.

What type of house she lives in depends on what type, place, and time with-in the vast Medieval era you are thinking about. But washing floors would be a no-no because pouring water of dirt = mud and who wants to walk in that all day? They wouldn't be sweeping floors either, because a broom + dirt = dust in the air and as most Medieval houses did not have ventilation, you'd be coughing all day if you tried to sweep the floor.

Keep in mind that what most movies show as "Medieval" times is often actually the Renaissance. Medieval is pre-1300, and basic architecture hadn't even been invented yet. There were no such thing as glass windows, chimneys, or floor boards yet, not outside of a Catholic Church at least. Rooms were dark, musty, and cold.

Don’t have your chambermaids or scullery maids going room to room lighting fireplaces either. Why? Well, if they didn’t have chimney’s can you guess why they didn’t have chimneys? Yep. It would be because they didn’t have fireplaces for chimney’s to be sprouting up out of!

They didn't often bake their own food. There existed bakers who did that. Servants in Medieval times would go to the market to buy food each day. Most people did not have their own cows, goats, or chickens, and bought those already cooked from the local butcher. 

If they had a stove at all, it was a big walk in brick "pizza oven fireplace" style affair off the side of the house/castle so that it didn't let smoke in the building. Or it was a giant abode style "kiln" like thing that resembled a house sized bee hive in the courtyard.

While there existed fireplaces in some houses, they did not have chimneys and instead were just a round pile of stones sitting in the center of a room, with a hole cut in the ceiling, in the vague hopes that the smoke, might, possibly, maybe, go up and out instead of filling up the house. You would have seen these in poorer serf and peasant homes.

Those castle with the big brick fireplaces, seen in movies? Those are almost always a French Rococo or Baroque castle that the film crew thought would look better in the movie then an actually  Medieval castle that was nothing more then 1 room dingy they couldn't even stand up straight in.

For the invention of both cast iron stoves and chimneys as we know them today, you want to head to the 1700s. They were both invented by Benjamin Franklin, in America.

Keep in mind too the height of most rooms in Medieval times. They had no indoor heat. Heat rises. Most ceilings were under 6 feet tall. Most doors were under 4 feet tall. If you want to describe a man entering a Medieval house/castle, it would be correct to say "he stooped to enter", which explains too the name of the board around the door, which is of course "the stoop".

More often then not the front door was a large skin (deer or bear) hung over the opening. Wooden doors were not yet common place. If your princess is in Scotland it would be a large woolen blanket known as a kilt. (No, the kilt was NOT a type of skirt in Medieval times, and the kilt skirt is also NOT Scottish. It was a British invention made in the 1800s by British fox hunters traveling to Scotland. The actual Scottish people never wore such a garment. The Kilt skirt was based off the Great Kilt, which was a 8 yard blanket, worn like a cape, and tied at the waist to keep it from falling off.)

(There was a section here, in the original draft, that got deleted from the published edition. You can read that HERE.)

Are you looking at Lord of the Rings as inspiration for Medieval life? Most authors use LOTR as their inspiration, but let me tell you something about LOTR: It is set in the Middle Ages, a time period AFTER Medieval and BEFORE Renaissance.

Middle Ages are not Medieval, nor were Dark Ages. You want a movie that ACCURATELY portrays a Medieval setting? Try Conan the Barbarian. Conan the Barbarian is set in Medieval times, as is Xena Warrior Princess, Ben Hur, and King of Kings. Medieval starts at the crucifixion of Christ in the Bible. This is something to think about when it comes to writing a Medieval setting.

Also common error seen in Medieval fiction is to have servants drawing baths for the princess/lady/queen. In European Medieval times, servants wouldn't be "drawing baths", people didn't bathe. It was believed to be a sin to bathe and there were laws that made bathing punishable by death, because it was believed that only witches bathed. So depends on how historically accurate you want to be. Once a year people would gather at ponds/lakes/rivers and bathe fully clothed, while a priest would oversee it and be walking around pouring oil on people's heads and blessing them (to ensure that no water demons entered their bodied devoured their souls and turned them into witches.).

Sometimes royalty believed it was okay to bathe if they did not bathe in water, so they would bathe in milk instead, but milk was hard to get in large amounts and fairly expensive to buy, so only nobility did this, and they would only have done it once or twice a year..

Peasant families often didn't care about the witch superstition and would bath at night in secret a few times a year, rarely more often than once every 3 or 4 months.

Keep in mind too, that daily baths were an invention of 1970s medical research, so at no time period before the 1970s should you ever have a character taking baths more than once a week. Weekly baths were not seen prior to the early 1800s when folks began to believe it a sin to enter church unclean and thus entire families would bath together every Saturday night, in order to be clean on Sunday. Prior to this baths were seen as a seasonal thing, something you did in the fall after harvest. In the late 1700s through the 1800s servants would have been drawing baths for a princess, but not at any time period before 1750s would this be used believably in a historical novel.

This is only European culture though. Native American, Asian, and Mediterranean cultures bathed frequently even in Medieval times, and it was their constant weekly baths that caused many Europeans to label them as "primitive savage heathen pagans". Which is rather ironic when you think about it.

This is something to keep in mind if you want your story believable in historical accuracy. I once read a book, set in the 1600s where the main character was a woman who took daily baths and bathed her baby boy daily as well. As I was reading it I couldn't stop laughing. It was so ridiculous! Daily baths in the 1600s! That is so funny. Boy the author of that book, must be a lot younger than me, because I am old enough to remember when daily baths was considered not exactly a good thing.

I remember watching Saturday morning cartoons in the 1970s and there used to be those "public service awareness ads" on, you know when some famous actor like Vincent Price or a famous singer like Johnny Cash, would come on and tell kids not to get in a car with strangers, or to avoid eating eggs because people died from eating eggs (anyone remember THAT ad?) and there was one ad that frequently played which told kids of the "recent scientific discovery" that we should take a bath AS OFTEN AS ONCE PER WEEK!

In the 1970s it had just been discovered that it was OKAY and safe to bath weekly, not daily - weekly. Did you know, that if you tried to take a bath DAILY in the 1970s, you were considered weird, mentally ill, sent to a psychiatrists, and diagnosed as having "EXTREME OCD".

1970s.

Not 1870s, not a hundred years ago, but less than 40 years ago science was discovering the benefits of washing WEEKLY, not daily - weekly - got it?

In the 1970s so few people bathed more than once a month that ads were being played on TV on Saturday mornings to teach kids they should remember to bath at least as often as once a week! And you were sent to a psychiatrist if you were crazy enough to bath daily.

Have you ever watched shows of the 1950s, like I love Lucy or George Burns and Gracie Allen? Pay attention to episodes when women take about washing their hair. Common are phrases like: "I'm due to wash my hair next week." In the 1950s, women bathed more often then men, and usually women only bathes once per month. Thus phrases like that were typical in 1950s TV shows.

Daily baths were not commonplace in the 1970s and weekly baths were so uncommon that kids had to be reminded by TV actors to take a weekly bath and to make sure they told their parents about the benefits of weekly bathing too. And then here I was reading this book which was supposed to be the genre of Historical Fiction and the main character is taking daily baths in the 1600s. Daily baths in the 1600s - in a historical fiction novel? WOW that author didn't even use common sense let alone do any historical research!

But yeah, I say this because if you are leaning in a historical accuracy slant, than don't have your princess demanding her servant be drawing baths, without the townsfolks pointing the finger of witchcraft at her.

Of course if it's fantasy, sci-fi, or other alternate world, than none of this matters and you could easily have your princess bathing daily no problems. So it's all a matter of how far outside of historical accuracy you want to take it, whether or not you decide to include a servant drawing baths in a Medieval (or any other pre-1800) setting.

So by this time you are wondering, well what did a Medieval servant do? Everything. Literally, absolutely everything. Till the land (by hand, with a hook ended stick or a stick with a flat stone or clam shell tied to it’s end, no shovels were not invented yet, these clams on sticks would lead to shovels being invented though and no, don’t try to say they had horses plowing their fields, horse or ox drawn plows were not common use prior to the 1800s), plant the seeds (which they had harvested and dried by hand last harvest), tend the crops, chased out crows/blackbirds, harvested crops, hunted for game and flesh (the word meat was not yet being used to mean food), sewed clothes, repaired worn clothes, washed cloths (by boiling them in caustic lye, which often resulted in the deaths of many servants and was a job reserved only for servant you really hated and didn't care if they dropped dead), cooking food was an all day core: involving stoking the fire, grinding the grain into flour, mixing the flour with other foodstuffs, boiling the water, and then carefully stirring and turning and turning and stirring for 5 or 6 hours over a fire pit (only those few nobles wealthy enough for a big castle had a stone oven).

If they lived in an "advanced" town (which were relatively rare before the 1500s, unless it was a super sized place like Rome), there might be a mill to send the grain to be ground, or if they had no mill but another town did they might send the servant there to have the grain ground (and it was often several days travel between towns) or if they were wealthy enough and had no near by mill to go to, when the merchant from the nearest port was in town they might give him the grain to take with him on his next trip, to have ground and brought back 8 or 9 months later. If they had no mill or no access to a mill, the servant ground the grain by hand, or did not grind it at all and thus cooked nothing using flour. It all depends on the location and wealth of the town whether or not your princess gets her daily bread.

Most towns were 1 to 2 days walk apart. Which meant about 10 to 15 miles from each other, separated by either mountains, fields, desert, or forest, depending on the region in question.

Each region would have many towns and one larger town that may or may not have been a city. The larger town could be 2 or 3 months travel to get to (200 to 300 miles away), or it could be just the next town 1 day away, depending on which town you lived in.

Also keep in mind that white bread was not invented til the 1950s, and in Medieval times people would fight over who got to have the bread that was filled with the most weevils (bugs). Frying maggots and adding bugs, maggots, flies, cockroaches, caterpillars, worms, etc to the cooking pot was common place, and eating bugs was something people in Medieval times looked forward to and enjoyed. So keep that in mind when you are tempted to have your princess squeamishly going "eeeew gross! there's a bug in my bread!" (a sad and common error authors write in pre-1700 historic fiction). They also eat frogs, slugs, snails, turtles, song birds, cats, dogs, horses, rats, mice, bats, and other things people today would not consider eating.

Medieval castles with elephant tusks and lion skins on the walls, were not just wasted decorations from poaching - the flesh of those animals would have been eaten. Medieval hunters were far less wasteful than hunters of other time periods, because much of the world was plagued with a serious lack of rain, thus a serious lack of food. Starvation was a widespread global problem in Medieval times and that is why you see diets including bugs and maggots, cats and dogs.

And a side note: all those portraits you see of women holding dogs in their laps? They were NOT pets! It was common practice in Medieval times for ladies to carry around stuffed (dead) dogs, thus why they were called "toy dogs" - they literally were toys and it had nothing to do with their size.

Also servants had “odd” jobs in Medieval times, jobs modern folk don’t often think of, like being a wet nurse. There were superstitions that caused wealthy women to believe that breast feeding their babies was wicked or sinful, and so they would hire peasant women to do it for them. Every queen or princess would have a wet nurse for each of their children. (Keep in mind too that all children were breastfed at least until they were 4 or 5 years old and often until they were 8, 9, or 10 years old, in Medieval times.)

Another “odd job” in Medieval times is a servant would have "plucked the princess". It was the fashion in Medieval times for nobility to be seen as totally hairless - so every hair: arms, legs, eyebrows, eyelashes, underarms, chin, and about the first 2 to 4 inches of hair line would be plucked clean (the wealthier the woman, the farther back the hairline would be plucked, and a queen or princess would likely be totally bald), the goal would have been to remove them by the roots so they wouldn't grow back either. Men would often have their entire head plucks, and so did some women.

Movies that show actors sporting beards and long hair are HUGELY inaccurate for Medieval times. You want accuracy in this, look to paintings and tapestries to get an idea of what people looked like 900 to 1300s - unless they were peasants, they were usually bald and lacking eyebrows and eyelashes. To be historically accurate her servant would be checking her daily to ensure no new hairs had grown. This was done as a way to show they did not have lice or fleas. IF she had any hair remaining on the top of her head (which was unlikely for a princess) it would be covered with a veil.

Lice was a HUGE issue in medieval times and plucking every hair off every inch of your body was the only way to get rid of lice and the only way to prevent lice.

Peasants who could not afford to have a servant pluck them, either coated their bodies with honey than after it hardened scraped it (and their hair) off with a knife or razor. Generally peasants would only shave their legs under the theory that they would not get lice if there was no hair on their legs to attract lice to crawl up them. Saving their legs was a way to say "Hey! I don't have lice!" (this is why women of the modern era shave their legs - because men got used to seeing hairless and liceless legs)

Did you know that shaving your legs is proof "I don't have lice!" and that's why women did it? 

Shaving your legs meant either you had lice and shaved your legs to get rid of them, or you are paranoid of getting lice so shave your legs to prevent them.

Now this is by no means an exhaustive list. There are plenty of more medieval servants jobs, and there is certainly a lot more detail for each one then what I've mentioned here. This list is not intended as a full history, but rather to give you a jumping off point to help you with your research, by listing a few of the more common servant jobs in medieval times. There is not a lot of information on the internet about castle servants in medieval times, but if you do your digging you can find enough to help you with your novel. You might have to go a few hundred pages deep into Google search results to find what you are after though, as Google tends to promote he who sells the most products over he who has the most content.

If you are only looking to add bits of flavour to your story, what limited info I've put here about castle servants in medieval times may suit your needs. If you are looking to get into some really big details of historical accuracy with     then your best bet is not the internet, but rather inter-library loan. Head to your local college library and start looking for reference manuals and textbooks on Medieval history. You'll get charts and maps, dates and names, and will end up with far better research than anything you'll ever find online. Life in medieval times is a fascinating subject to study, life in a medieval castle, which is very, very, drastically different then what the average person thinks it is.

Castles in medieval times were far smaller then people expect as most people thing of something built in the 1500's when they think of a castle, whereas the Medieval castles were built in the 800s nearly a 1,000 years before the mega sized "fairy tale princess" style castles began to be built. And most of the "typical" fairy tale princess style castles were actually built in the 1700s.

Interestingly, what most people think of as "Medieval princess" is often based off of Disney's Cinderella, which is the Baroque or Rococo Period of the 1700s and is a far cry from being Medieval.

In nearly every case I've ever encountered of a "Medieval princess" in a "Medieval castle" in a novel, it's almost always the Baroque (1650 to 1700) or Rococo (1700 to 1780) time period that they are actually referring to, which is well over a 1,000 years AFTER the Medieval time period ended.

And if you think life in the Medieval castle is interesting, you might want to look into life in a medieval peasant house as well, which is often times far more fascinating. Medieval times history in general is an amazing thing to research. I love doing so, and I don't know, people do seem to ask me questions about life in Medieval times more often then other topics, probably because I tend to write about Fantasy about wizards in a quasi-Medieval setting, which features more historically accurate details than is typically normal in a Fantasy world. Perhaps I should expand this page into a series of pages about Medieval life? It's certainly something to think about.

One topic I'm thinking of doing is food in medieval times, because so many people write a medieval setting and then show a group of travellers stopping for the night and eating stew and bread! LOL! It takes 3 to 4 days(48 or more hours) of slow simmering to make a stew, and fresh bread without modern day preservatives lasts 2 or 3 days at best before it turns into penicillin.

No. If you got Medieval travellers, they'll be eating jerky, apples, hard tac, and hard cheese, along side whatever rabbits, squirrels, fish, birds, beetles, dragonflies, worms, or caterpillars they caught along side the campsite.

Well, in any case, this page has gotten very, very long. I should end this here. I'll probably write another one to go with it sooner or later.

Much of the information you just read here was used in writing the Quaraun series.

The Quaraun series is neither Medieval or Historically accurate. It is time travel Fantasy largely set in the 1400s, but frequently tosses characters into the 1970s, and once in a while into dates of 2,000B.C. to 2525. So, you definitely wouldn't read the Quaraun series looking for any sort of "Medieval History", however, vast amounts of research does in fact go into the creation of every element of the series, thus how I came to be researching Medieval, Middle Ages, and Renaissance.

In 1996, I graduated with a 2 year degree in Theatrical Fashion Design, Dressmaking, and History, and had focused my time period of choice on the study of the 1300s to the 1600s, thus much of my books end up set in this era, with people dressing and acting typical of that period.

I simply love history, love cloths, and am utterly fascinated by the overall fashion history of pretty much every place, time, and culture.

I grew up in the 1970s, thus why you see many of my books set in the 1970s, rather then current era.

In any case, I love finding all sorts of weird little known facts about history, like the ones I've listed on this page here and I hope you've enjoyed reading this as much as I've enjoyed writing it for you.

Thank you for sending me this absolutely wonderful question. It has been by far one of my favorites of all time to sit down and write the answer too. Hopefully I have been able to answer your question. Good luck with you story and have a wonderful day!

More articles like this one, and more then 300 video interviews on writing, can be found in the following links to other articles in this series:

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On Writing The Quaraun Series

The Complete Index To Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About Moon Elf Society, But Was Afraid To Ask;

or

The Zaharam-Chapelle-Parunas  Ethnographical World Building Questionnaire

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World-Building In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi

1. Creating a 1400's Fantasy World For Time Traveling Wizards
2. How Your Degree Affects Your World Building
3. How would you explain your Fantasy world to a stranger?
4. In what order do you create your world?
5. Writing Maine: How To Write About Maine Life Accurately
6. The Cover Art Gallery 

Weird-Building In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi

1. Why is there a kitchen sink in my pocket?
2. Twerking Dragons - The Joys Of Writing with A Voice Recorder
3. The Saco River Curse
4. What The Ocean Gives Me (How Things In Your Life Affect Your Writing)

Building A Magic System In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi

1. Wizards vs Witches vs Sorcerers: How are they different?
2. Magic Systems and How to Build Them
   
3. Necromancy: How will resurrection affect society as a whole?
4. Spell-casting Side Effects of Magic
5. Necromancy FAQ - A Real Necromancer Compares Fantasy Necromancy With The Reality
6. Colour Magic - Gypsy Style
7. Beware of White Men In Gypsy Clothing: Fake Psychic Scams
8. Child Sacrifice in Fantasy Novels

Plotting & Writing Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi

1. Ernest Hemingway Style of Writing Literary Fiction Used In Epic Fantasy Novels
2. Do you write a novel start-to-finish?
3. Ideas, Ideas, Ideas (Where Do You Get Them?)
4. Should I plan for ending or just keep writing?
5. NaNoWriMo Overachievers: How did you do it?
6. How Long is 50,000 Words?
7. Why Write 50,000 Words In 30 Days?
8. How long does it take to hit 1667 words?
9. Average Typing Speed

Character Creation In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi

1. What exactly makes an Elf an Elf? 
2. Phookas
3. Writing Medieval Servants: Their jobs
4. Writing Albinos With Medical Accuracy
5. FAQs About Quaraun
6. Transgender, Transsexual, Transvestite, or Intersex

Writing Sex In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi

1. How To Write Hot Sex?
2. The Amazon Adult Dungeon
3. Why Quaraun Is Not Erotica (2015 Answer)
4. Why Quaraun Is Not Erotica (2017 Answer)
5. Suicide, Rape, & Abuse 

Disabled Characters In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi

1. On being a handicapped CosPlayer at PortCon Maine 2017
2. Quaraun & Autism In Fantasy Novels
3. On Writing A Clinically Insane Character Accurately, While Avoiding The Psychopath Stereotype
4. Autistics Have Feelings Too & Diverse Books Rant

Drug Use In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi

1. Psychedelics In A 'High' High Fantasy World (High Elves Getting High)
2. High, High Elves: Elves on Opium | Drug Use 

Horror In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi

1. Why do Lovecraftian beings come to earth?
2. Writing Horror That Features Violence Against Children 
3. Writing Stuff That Churns Your Gut
4. Twighilight Not Twilight

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The Quaraun Series On Amazon:

I am wondering why has Amazon moved the Quaraun books to the category "Transgender Romance" and also "Gay Erotica"? The base story is a deeply depressed, suicidal, drug addict Elf who's lover commit suicide and he's trying not to do the same. It's an old Elf in a tavern, monologuing a lot of flashbacks and back story scenes of his youth. These stories are dark, bloody, angsty, full of drug use, murder, rape, Medieval torture, mental/physical/emotional abuse, and references to depression and suicide - no romance in it, unless you count the occasional (and usually brutally violent) rape scenes that show up in nearly every volume - sorry - no clue what Amazon is thinking or why they moved these to Romance and Erotica, but these books are NOT even close to being Romance or Erotica on any level at all. When I published these books I put them in "Dark Fantasy" and "Yaoi". If they show up in any category other then "Dark Fantasy" and "Yaoi", it's because Amazon put them there without my authorization or approval.

~EelKat

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Author Interviews
On Writing The Quaraun Series:

1. Question Everything Before Putting It In Your World 

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Author Interviews
On CosPlaying The Quaraun Characters:

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Author Interviews
Reacting To Old Orchard Beach's
White Power Gay Hating Over Reaction Ban
Of The Quaraun Series:

1. Question Everything Before Putting It In Your World 

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The 4 door white truck continues to sit at the end of my drive way (146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine) near every night around sunset, reeving it's engine and squealing it's tires, with the driver yelling anti-gay threats and obscenities out the window. He continues to do the same thing at my dad's apartment building (Biddeford Maine) a few times a week, usually in mid to late afternoon time. He continues to follow me to shopping to various stores in various towns throughout the states.

Phrases he yells from the truck include:

"Kill or be killed remember Saco Shaws all transsexuals are alike"

"I keep a gun under the seat of my truck, I'm gonna use it to shoot you in the head, you transvestite freak"

if cars are going by he yells to them: "that thing is Ken's son, look at how's it's dressed; it's insane, it has autism, we can't allow that thing and it's gay cars in our family friend town of Old Orchard Beach"

He often babbles deranged ramblings about something he calls "the gay-pocalypse", raving lunacy about how "all the gays are gathering" on his doorstep. He raves some crazy nonsense about how Armageddon is coming and the war to end all wars will be "the gays against the Christians" and Christians have to be ready to "kill the gays"

My car is the Autism Awareness Car and had 2.5million marbles glued to it (I have Autism - savant - Kanner's syndrome) he claims tat my car "is gay" because of what it looks like. My car has been vandalized several dozen times, including to have the tires slashed 7 times in 6 months.

After dark often around 10PM, he stands at the end of the logging road across the street from me and shoots at my motohome (in February 2014 he shot holes in my neighbour's barn while doing this). I have video footage of 3 of his shootings at me here:  https://youtu.be/NUebzJ9sz9U and here: https://youtu.be/C4dZbgG-Smw

This has gone on since August 2013 now, in addition to all the vandalism, hate crimes, pet beheadings, etc that has happened, including the bomb that blew up our house in 2006.

As you know, that whole time I had not been able to get a plate number on the truck. He as just here again, and I just realized why I could not get a plate number... there are no plates on the truck, either on the front or on the back. However, as he was driving away today... I noticed, there is a plate, stuck up in the back window of the truck, where it can barely be seen, deliberately obscured from view behind a silver tool box.

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If You Like The Quaraun Series You Might Also Like:

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Writing Resources I Use When Writing The Quaraun Books:

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