Romance Authors and How to Act Like One

By Wendy C Allen

Wendy Christine Allen, 2019, able to sit up in a chair for the first time in years, and able to raise up my arm and wiggle fingers. This was when I started playing Witcher 3 on Twitch as part of my physical therapy to regain finger movement. Playing Witcher 3 daily from 2016 to 2019, is how I regained the use of my thumb and two for fingers on my right hand... it is also why I stopped playing Witcher 3 in 2019, once I had strengthen my two forefingers enough to start typing again. Wendy Christine Allen, Old Orchard Beach's Autistic Author, Artist, Illustrator, & Art Car Designer Counting Down to the September 23, 2028 50th Anniversary of my first published book (September 23, 1978) If you are here looking for The Twighlight Manor series, The Crystonite Wars series, The Wild Years series, The White Rock Asylum for the Criminally Insane series, The Twisted Tales series, the Captured By a MerMan series, The Space Dock 13 series, The Kats of Planet Ptarmagin series, the stories about Miss Citten the Eel-Kat, or the stories about Etiole... ALL of those series were combined and consolidated into The Adventures of Quaraun the Insane Pink Necromancer series in 2014, so ALL the different series, are now under one series title. List of the published titles still in print: The Index of over three thousand stories in The Pink Necromancer series What the series is about, for those new here: The introduction to The Pink Necromancer Series.

If you want some stories to get you started in The Pink Necromancer series, reading these first will give you a good introduction to the 3 main characters: BoomFuzzy's Chowder Dilemma If your ass ain’t freezing or your brains ain’t scrambled, you’re ain’t really trying A Very Important Clump of Grass The Washer Woman & The Fae Absinthe Slushies: An Ode to Frozen Green Fairy Wine Bone Dice Excited For The New Baby Zwodder: A Drowsy Stupid State of Mind Pink Sheep, Cheesy Burritos, and The Grim Reality of Zombies Open Grave The Phooka's Dragon School The Moon Goddess Laughs From The Rooftops The Jar of Pickled Toes The Book Burning Maggots, a You Can't Spell Hatred Without Red Hats A Day In The Life of a Bumbling Necromancer The Three-Seventeen Pee Expedition

My Elves Are JellyFish...and I asked Google AI and ChatGPT 5.6 what they thought of this.

As requested, my daily writing prompt series is now available print paperback editions on Amazon.

365 Cozy Writing Prompts For Fantasy Writers Vol.1: Daily Writing Prompts Series For Writers of Serial Pulp Fiction

365 Cozy Writing Prompts For Fantasy Writers Vol.2: Daily Writing Prompts Series For Writers of Serial Pulp Fiction

365 Cozy Writing Prompts For Fantasy Writers Vol.3: Daily Writing Prompts Series For Writers of Serial Pulp Fiction

365 Cozy Writing Prompts For Fantasy Writers Vol.4: Daily Writing Prompts Series For Writers of Serial Pulp Fiction

365 Cozy Writing Prompts For Fantasy Writers Vol.5: Daily Writing Prompts Series For Writers of Serial Pulp Fiction

There are 20 volumes of this writing prompt series currently planned and in varying stages of finishing, hopefully all 20 will be published by the end of 2026. I likely will do a 2nd series of writing prompt books in 2027.

The first of the Visual Novels/Video Games for The Adventures of Quaraun the Inane/The Pink Necromancer series is published and available on Itch.io, there are 3 more planned for release in 2026, 6 more planned for release in 2027, and the big 60-hour 80k word 150 page one (Quaraun Goes To the Fair) is planned for a 2028 release.

There is a Pink Necromancer card game and a Pink Necromancer board game, as well as a Pink Necromancer table top RPG supliment for Dungeons and Dragons, all in the works, and to be released over the next couple of years as well.

Health update: August 4, 2026 - in recovery for 6 months+ (at least until mid-January 2027...all book and video game releases are pushed back at least 6 months) see video below for why...

@eelkat health update #maine #disabilityawareness #wheelchairlife #wheelchairvlogger #multiplesclerosis ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

@eelkat The man who built the grease fryer bomb that blew up my house October 16, 2006, gets out of prison in 4 years. :( #thishapped #fbiinvestigation #mainelife #oldorchardbeach #Maine ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

@eelkat Answering #questions about my #multiplesclerosis specific #vocic #z51 #wheelchair ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

@eelkat #wheelchair #artcar #cairnterrier #doglife #mainetok ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

@eelkat Health update: #chickenpox #bellspalsy #RamsayHuntsyndrome #paralysis #recovery ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

@eelkat I seem to have had another stroke (during the night while I was asleep?) #stroke #paralysis ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

Update Sept 3, 2026:

I am able to get around enough to take Koko to dog park... today is 29 days since getting out of hospital. My diet is still mostly liquid, but im eating some solid food again, but its like rice or soft mushy baby food type stuff because I still can not chew yet, though I can swallow again. My jaw is still not functioning good so im having trouble talking still. So there's been slight improvement to my mouth, throat, and jaw, but, zero improvement to my eye, which is a major concern, be Im almost fully blind right now. im legally blind since birth in my left eye, so I have no ability to fall back on using my left eye. My right eye is the one injured and my vision in it is "40% decreased" according to my doctor, but it wasn't good vision to begin with, and right now my right eye is not much different from my legally blind left eye. Which I why I have to have someone drive my car for me instead of me driving my car myself right now, which is very frustrating, because, being a female, I had to fight for over twenty years to be allowed to drive. I started sneaking out at age 31 and dressing as a man to go to Old Orchard Beach high school to get a ged, because us females are not allowed to go to school. And i was 37 years old when snuck out to the DMV and got a driver's permit and started going to college. I was 42 and 8 months pregnant when my family found out I was going to college and thats when I was punished by the backhoe driving over my house and my spine broken with a golf club and my baby born right then and killed with same golf club. So it's very frustrating now, so soon after finally being able to drive , to now not be able to drive because of an eye injury, especially after 14 years of being paralyzed from the golf club and not being allowed to have a wheelchair, again, because i am female and we females are simply not allowed to do anything. I hate the culture I was born into. I wish I had the freedom to go to school and drive a car the way American women do. I wish having my spine broken with a golf club and my baby killed with a golf club and a backhoe driven over my house was not how men in my family punishment women in my family for learning to read and write. Its so frustrating not being able to to drive again, so soon after 14 years being paralyzed, and being paralyzed by the golf club was the punishment for getting a driver's license back in 2013 after 30 years of men not letting me have one. I hate my family's culture and how they treat us women.

I get so sick of Americans telling me how they wish they could be a Gypsy… they are either misogynist woman hating pigs, or delusional idiots who haven't got a clue how shittily we Gypsy women are treated by Gypsy men, because no one in their righ mind who knows anything about Gypsy culture would ever want to be part of it. I hate that I was born a Gypsy. 

update sept 7, 2026

"You would not make a good teacher"... what does that mean, and why are there so many people on Railroad Ave and Western Ave and Cutts St why walk up to me and say that to me?

I find it very confusing. I have low functioning Autism (the Rain Man type) and so i have very little understanding of words beyond the basic ones, and i never went to to school, so I never learned maths or sciences, and I only had remedial classes at Southern Maine Community College, because I did not have an education to enroll with regular, I was there taking every reading and writing class they had to learn how to read and write, and also took speaking classes to learn how to talk (i spoke Shetland Scottish language because that was language my grandmother spoke but she died when I was 8 so I only knew that language to speak and write, and I was 37 when I went to college and 42 when I learned English speaking and I still cant speak English good yet), all the other classes I took were art painting and cooking.

So the phrase "You would not make a good teacher" makes no sense to me because it seems to imply that I am trying to be a teacher, but I don't have anything close to the education ti be a teacher, and im not trying to be a teacher. So I don't know why people keep saying this phrase to me and I assume it must have some sort of a slang meaning, but I can't figure out what it could be of why do these people keep saying it to me.

see video below for more information: 

@eelkat "You would not make a good teacher"... what does that mean, and why are there so many people on Railroad Ave and Western Ave and Cutts St why walk up to me and say that to me? I find it very confusing. I have low functioning Autism (the Rain Man type) and so i have very little understanding of words beyond the basic ones, and i never went to to school, so I never learned maths or sciences, and I only had remedial classes at Southern Maine Community College, because I did not have an education to enroll with regular, I was there taking every reading and writing class they had to learn how to read and write, and also took speaking classes to learn how to talk (i spoke Shetland Scottish language because that was language my grandmother spoke but she died when I was 8 so I only knew that language to speak and write, and I was 37 when I went to college and 42 when I learned English speaking and I still cant speak English good yet), all the other classes I took were art painting and cooking. So the phrase "You would not make a good teacher" makes no sense to me because it seems to imply that I am trying to be a teacher, but I don't have anything close to the education ti be a teacher, and im not trying to be a teacher. So I don't know why people keep saying this phrase to me and I assume it must have some sort of a slang meaning, but I can't figure out what it could be of why do these people keep saying it to me. #mainelife #biddefordmaine #maine #disabilitytiktok #Biddeford ♬ original sound Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

update Sept 15, 2026:

I have some slight movement in some my fingers again again after over a decade being paralyzed

you remember how I used to be a professional doll making, pattern designer, and embroiderer, back before I became paralized and before my son was murdered and being the backhoe drove over my house?

all my equipment, sewing machines, ect were all destroyed by the backhoe driving over my house, and I have been quardepelegic for over a decade because of it so could not use my hands to sew or draw or embroider, and so only continued to do my writing of novels since then because I could do that with dragon dictation software,

well, since 2016, I been playing Witcher 3 and don't starve video games on twitch livestream, one hand two fingers, as part of my therapy to regain nerve and muscle use of my fingers, and now after 10 years of that, I have somewhat more movement in my fingers and im thinking maybe I can try to do embroidery and doll making again, but not sure, anyways, now im rebuying all of my sewing and embroidery equipment that the backhoe destroyed when it drove over my house, and hopefully I can use my hand enough to embroider again.

waiting for stuff to arrive in mail, so soon I should find out if ten years of twitch gaming has given me enough muscle strength to use my fingers to embroider again.

update to the previous video, answering viewer question about lack of hospital vs broken spine

Wheelchair Fundraiser... I need to upgrade to a power wheelchair, the manual one just isn't enough anymore. But the power wheelchair is $25k. Yes, twenty five thousand dollars. Wtf? I can get a car for a quarter that price, why are wheelchairs so damned expensive? That's more money then I make in five years, so I need to start a fundraiser for it.

May 10, 2012

Got an interesting question emailed to me here. Let's answer it...

Yes - this is what I have always noticed. Almost every time I see folks saying they get a ton of downloads, it's nearly always romance, with paranormal and historical romance getting the highest downloads. Other genres just don't seem to get the high download rates romance does. And sadly sci-fi (my favorite genre) gets the worst sales of all the genres.

Likewise romance authors tend to network with other romance authors and "share" fans, so you'll see Author A has 2,000 fans on FaceBook and Author B has a different 2,000 fans, the two authors will start recommending each others books and next thing you know they both now have 4,000 fans. 

Romance authors are like that.

It's really common for romance authors to read romance and then tell their fans: 

• "Hey, this author is great too, if you like me, read them."

Interestingly only big house published Romance authors seem to do this. Harlequin and Avon authors are constantly shouting out to other authors.

But the self-pubbed Romance authors... not so much.

And while Romance authors are in the habit of promoting each other, I actually never see authors of other genres doing this, in fact, I've seen many self-pubbed authors (even Romance ones) doing the opposite, and looking at fellow authors as competition and ratting them out.

I can't even begin to count how many times I've read 1 star (Amazon and GoodReads) reviews that were clearly written by an author who was angry that a competitor was getting higher sales. You can tell, because they are never a review of the book, are never made by a verified purchase, and all say things like:

• "This author is a piece of shit don't buy from her." 
• "Nothing but a stupid retard."
• "This book is about gayz."
• "Burn in hell you bitch."
• "I live next door to this bitch and just found out she's an author. Don't buy from her."

And other such "reviews".

Amazon is plagued with "reviews" that are spam as well:

• "I'm an author too. Buy my book. LINK."
• "Hey, if you like this book, you'll love my book! LINK."
• "Why read this book, when you could be reading my book. LINK."
• "My book is way better. LINK."

It's reached the point that I no longer read book reviews on Amazon (or Goodreads) any more before buying a book, because I have to sift through hundreds of fake "reviews" to find any actual costumers who actually read the book.

I make a hobby out of reading 1 star reviews, even on books I've no intention of buying, because I find I learn a lot about editing from them (reviewers love to write very long and detailed reviews when they are angry! LOL!)

I see nearly every genre being hit by angry self pubbers lashing out at fellow better selling self pubbers, in a mentality that seems to be:

 "If you out sell me, than I'm going to create 20 fake accounts and stop your sales buy giving you 20 1star reviews, so readers will start reading me instead of you, let’s see how you like that! So there!"

It's very childish, extremely unprofessional, and if they had any dreams of being picked up by a big house publisher, they chucked it out the window.

Yet in the romance genre you rarely ever see this sort of self pubber 1 star attacks on each other, instead it's tweets reading:

"OMG I love this book, she writes even better than I do, check her out!"

and FaceBook posts with lots of links to OTHER authors books, but almost never a single post linking to one of their own books.

It reminds me of Miracle on 34th Street when Macy's Santa was sending customers to Gimbels, and suddenly Macy's got more sales because of it.

Sort of a reverse psychology thing, where if you promote someone else, suddenly you're seen as the better person so folks buy yours too.

And that's another thing I've noticed: romance authors tend to hang out on Twitter and FaceBook and bounce happy thoughts and encouragement off each other.

While other genre authors hang out on Goodreads and troll each other with 1 star review feuds. Has anyone else ever noticed this?

I've been doing NaNoWriMo since 2004 and I see the same thing over there on their forums as well. Romance authors gather in joyful hoards, patting each other on the back, exchanging ideas, often throwing out a single idea which they all then write a book about, for example, one author may say: 

"Hey, let's write a story about a Highlander who kidnapped a witch from the enemy clan, planning to kill her, but falls in love with her instead?"

Next thing you know there are 50 romance authors writing a story based on that idea, at least 2 of which will get picked up by Harlequin, another by Avon, and the rest will be self pubbed.

Within a year all 50 books ON THE EXACT SAME STORY IDEA will come out and instead of kicking 1 stars at each other and screaming "You stole my idea" you'll see all 50 authors gathering on Twitter and FaceBook and posting links to all 50 books, and shouting out:

"Hey cool, check out this book, it's just like mine, you'll love it too!"

The readers end up buying all 50 books, because romance readers who like Highlanders kidnapping witches, want every single one of them (because the more Highlanders they can moon over the better) and will buy every single one of them, even if they never heard of the author before.

And believe me - as the proud owner of more than 2,000 paperback historical romance novels, a large majority of them about Highlanders kidnapping witches - I know it's true when folks tell you, romance readers can read the same story over and over again - there are only just so many times a Highlander can kidnap a witch and fall in love with her, but heck, does that stop me from buying every single dozen or so yearly new releases on that theme?

Nope.

Interestingly, go on the NaNoWriMo fantasy forum and try this, and OMG! watch out!

Within a week the mods will be on the forum breaking up the "you stole my idea you fuck faced son of a bitch creep, I’m gonna hunt you down, I know where you live, you fucking bastard out of hell!" fights, that start breaking out.

The sci-fi authors are screaming "I created that race, don't you dare use them! You bastard I’m gonna kill you, that was my idea!"

Others are saying "Well just you wait and see, you dare publish that and I'll 1star you to hell and back and make sure you don't ever get a sale, the world's gonna know you stole my idea, just you wait and see! I'm warning ya! I’m warning ya! You fucking cunt sucking cock lover! I'm gonna kill you you bastard if you ever dare publish a book before I do. Don’t think I’m joking! I’m warning ya! You'll see"

It's why I've not posted on the NaNoWriMo forums since 2010. There's some seriously mentally deranged psychos over there.

And you really want to see the fur start flying?

Head over the Absolute Write’s Water Cooler forums and check out the “I’m a REAL author, I’m TRADE PUBLISHED, you get the hell off our forums you self published piece of shit! I know who you are. I know what books you wrote. You get your no good self published ass off our forum or we’ll all gang up on you every damned one of us is going to give you a 1 star review. You’ll have a 100 1stars before nightfall, just you watch and see. We only want REAL authors here.”

And those are just the posts you see from the mods, wait till you starting reading things actual members say! Yowsa!

I don't get it, I really don't get it, but I see it happening on every single writer forum, every single year, all year long. It's like in every genre, the authors are viewing each other as the enemy and feel the need to compete and put each other down, and make sure they use GoodReads and 1star reviews as a weapon against each other. It's just so weird to see this sort of kill or be killed mentality among writers (myself being a romance writer I'm used to the whole banding together like a big happy family and sharing ideas.)

It seems to me that romance authors have this “we are all in this together so let’s help each other” outlook.

While other genres have high rates of authors who feel they are “loners” with the need to “fight tooth and claw to sink or swim” and make sure they trample as many others on their way to the top as possible.

I think the thing with romance is, readers are used to Harlequin and it's habit of sending out 4 new books every month to it's subscribers, all from new authors, (and just about every reader of romance has at least 2 or 3 different Harlequin subscriptions).

So romance readers get used to reading stories based on a theme as opposed to stories written by an author.

This seems to be the main difference.

Therefore, the reader who subscribes to romantic suspense, reads every romantic suspense.

Vampire romance subscribers read every vampire romance regardless of author. No reader cares which author wrote which book. All they care about is getting as many vampire stories on their to be read list as possible. They just gotta catch them all.

Woman obsessed with Texas rangers read every book with a cowboy on the cover without ever once thinking about who the author is. Who cares who wrote it as long as a the cover features a half naked guy with a coyboy hat and jeans?

Romance readers obsessively collect up hoards of Romance books from every possible author out there, so Romance authors do not feel the need to compete with each other because they know fans of their genre will by their book, even if they are not a big name author.

Other genres aren't this way.

Sci-Fi readers have 1 or 2 authors they read and they refuse to even consider a 3rd author, so Sci-Fi authors feel the need to attack other Sci-Fi authors, out of a desperate attempt to get the reader to notice them.

Horror readers are probably the worst for the snooty "I only read Stephen King and no one else. If you aren't Stephen King, I'm not gonna read you."

While loyalty to one author is fine, it alienated you from ever finding the vast assortment of other authors who are just as good and maybe better then the one you are devoted to.

There are no Sci-Fi book subscriptions, so no jolly, hi-hos to each other. There are no Horror book subscriber book clubs, so Horror authors have to sink or swim on their own, and most sink fast.

And this is where you see the bitter author duking it out on forums (and yes, Amazon reviews is a forum too).

In romance, readers do not form author loyalties, instead they form, hero type loyalties, and romance authors are used to this type of fanship, so they go out of their way to actively promote each other, thus you see fan crossovers in places like Twitter and FaceBook, and the end result is, romance authors end up getting higher download rates, simply because of the comradery among romance authors, with everybody promoting everybody else, and because readers of romance are conditioned to give new authors a try. Likewise romance authors are often also the biggest romance readers, so while they are writing a new book a month they are also buying a few new books each week.

Whereas other genres, there isn't that same sort of genre loyalty among readers, so authors feel the need to push above the competition, because their readers are more picky about WHO they read, with readers forming tighter author loyalties. Authors than have a bigger need to promote themselves, rather than promoting their book's hero.

I write romance, horror, and sci-fi, and I have seen a marked difference in sales, fans, and fellow authors in each of these genres. Romance way out sells horror, which way out sells sci-fi.

In romance, I can literally take the same story and republish it with new character names and it will sell every time - try that with horror or sci-fi, nope, nadda.

Did you know, that the majority of Romance authors only ever write 3 novels, then simply republish it over and over again?

It's called "Formula Writing"

Barbara Cartland

I heard of an author who did this:

She wrote one story, than every year, she'd edit it to have new place names (say the original was set in Scotland and the new one was set in Texas), new character names, and reword the love scenes, than publish it with a new title.

She started doing this every month, then every week.

In the end she wrote 881 romance novels this way.

Her name was Barbara Cartland, perhaps you heard of her: she's in the Guinness Book of World Records under 350 different entries, including the top selling author of all time, and the highest paid author in history.

She was the inventor of "formula writing" in the 1940s, and is the reason romance subscriptions like Harlequin exist today, and is the reason why romance readers got into the habit of reading the same story, over and over again and not caring that the only thing that changed was the character names.

Even today, 20 years after her death, her books are still selling like hotcakes, and the trend in formula romance writing is still going strong.

Yeah, basically, at least from what I've personally seen, if you are writing romance, you are going to get higher sales/downloads than every other genre, and every other genre is going to be really hard to get high sales rates, simply because romance readers have been conditioned by 50 years of Harlequin's "read every romance author under the sun" promotion style mentality, while other genre readers are conditioned to "devote all you energy to your 1 or 2 fave authors and ignore the rest" mentality.

What other genres need is a subscription group like Harlequin to condition readers to read every author in the genre rather than sticking with just a few faves.

The other times I see high downloads are with non-fiction/self help books on the topics of "finding love", "getting rich", and "power of positive thinking". It also seems like non-fiction in general, gets more sales/downloads than fiction.

No idea if anything I just said could be proven as actual trends or not, it’s just stuff I have noticed in my 31 years as a writer and self publisher. I’m sure others have noticed other trends, and my view is skewed by the fact that I hang out in romance reader/author circles, but this is how it seems to work from what I’ve seen, at least.

Well, so that's my comment to your comment. I'm not sure, were you asking a question here or just making a statement?

No.

Why?

Because, as I just explained... Romance readers read Romance. If you write 1 Romance and then hope for them to read your other books... you're living a pipe dream.

They will read your Romance book, never pay attention to your name, never pay attention to your other books, and move from your Romance book to the next newest release Romance book without ever giving your other books another thought.

A week after reading your book, if someone mentions your name they'll be:

"Who?"

The other person will have to say: "That book that had the hot guy wearing the black hat on the cover."

"Oh, that one. Yeah, I read that a week ago. I was SOOOOOO into WAAAAAAY back then, but it's old news now, look I'm reading this one today..."

If romance is not your thing, don't write it. I can tell you that much. Romance readers know good romance writers are good romance readers who know romance well, and if you don't know romance well, you won't write it well either.

And 1 Romance book won't cut it. You'll have to be releasing 1 a month MINIMUM, 1 a week recommended, to keep on top of the fickle nature of Romance readers.

Stick with genres you have a passion for writing.

And sci-fi, yeah, sales rates in sci-fi suck, basically you have to write a lot of books and settle for fewer sales each. You can't be a one-hit-wonder in sci-fi and expect to put food on the table.

Do a little research into your genre. Reader's reading patterns. Sales rates. What other authors do for a full time job to pay the bills after they realize they can't live off their writing career... it'll be quite eye opening once you start looking into the reality of being an author.

Publish a new book every 3 months if you write sci-fi. And hope you become someone's favourite author. 

It's the only way you'll make a living at it.

This page was written by Wendy Christine Allen of 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine.

All Rights Reserved.

While there are around 20k pages on this website, most of them are blocked from search engines, with only around 800 of them available for appearing in Google/Bing/etc search results. The remainder can only be accessed via the various links found throughout this site. This was done deliberately on my part, and I did it because the bulk of the pages on this website are chapters from 138 novels and 423 novellas, so only the first page of each novel and novella indexed by search engines, and the remainder are linked in order, one page at a time, via clicking "next page" at the end of each. So if you are looking for a specific page from a specific novel, Google can't help you.

Thank you for stopping by and have a nice day! ꧁✨🌸🔮🦄🔮🌸✨꧂ And if it’s your birthday today: ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐꧁ᴴᵃᵖᵖʸ☆ᵇⁱʳᵗʰᵈᵃʸ꧂🤍🎀🧸🌷🍭 Wendy Christine Allen 🌸💖🦄 aka EelKat 🧿💛🔮👻

Wheelchair Fundraiser

@eelkat i just found out there is yet another bizarre rumour going around. where are these wild rumours coming from? who is starting them? and why? ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

@eelkat since I've been flooded with hundreds of messages the past two weeks asking if I still own "the world's most haunted car", yes, and here it is, filmed today May 18, 2026… but my son Xavier is dead, i am crippled and given that people are AGAIN showing up calling my Dodge "haunted", calling my friend "an alien", calling me "transgender", and spreading wild defamation slander connecting me to Stephen King, I think I need to start taking down the contact information of every blogger, podcaster, youtuber, and social media account spreading these rumors, and sue every single one of them for CAUSING my car to be cut in half May 10, 2010, for CAUSING the backhoe that drove over my house August 8, 2013, for CAUSING my son's murder November 14, 2013, for CAUSING me to be crippled and in a wheelchair November 14, 2013, and for CONTINUING to CAUSE harassers to show up in person to harass me near daily, STILL now in 2026. EVERYONE telling you my car is haunted, telling you my friend is an alien, calling my car "the goldeneagle", calling my friend "Etiole", or trying to connect me or my car to Stephen King, is lying to you. They crippled me when I was 8 months pregnant, and a woman with a golf club, severed my spine and bashed my baby's head in, I spent 9 years relearning to walk, and the FBI is 13 years into the murder investigation and not yet identified the attacker who crippled me and killed my baby, both violently with a golf club and the FBI believes that it is friends and family of the woman who did it, are the ones who started and spread the rumors saying my car is haunted, saying I'm an alien abductee, saying all kinds of similar bs about aliens, ufos, ghosts, witchcraft, demons, and Stephen King connections, even though I don't believe in ghosts, aliens, ufos, demons, and had never heard of Stephen King before 30k of his fans showed up in my yard trying to find my car! FBI believes the backhoe driver and the murderer are the same person and it is a developer who wanted my land and so started the Stephen King, ghost, and alien rumors all in an attempt to drive me off my land, and when it didn't work they drove a backhoe over my house, and when that didn't work they crippled me and killed my son. Why are they doing this? How do I get them to stop? ♬ original sound - Wendy C Allen | 📚 Author

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Do you know who drove this backhoe over my house at 146 Portland Avenue, Old Orchard Beach, Maine on August 8, 2013? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

My house at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, July 4, 2013, photo taken because we had just finished building a baby room on the back. vs My house August 8, 2013, when the same group of people (yes group, the golf club woman was not alone when she attacked November 14, 2013, nor was she alone with her second attack July 2016.) who murdered my son on November 14, 2013 at Southern Maine Community College and crippled me July 26, 2016 at scarborough WalMart,... they arrived the first time with a backhoe on August 8, 2013, that they used to drive over my house, during a time of day that I normally was home asleep... I had to work a different shift at the Waffle Cone Pizza Food Truck at George's Parking Lot by Bill's Pizza at the OBB Peir, that day, otherwise, I too would be at the bottom of a landfill, along with my house and everything I owned that was also in the house. I was 5 months pregnant at the time and have been homeless for just under 14 years, homeless ever since....

... which means it is now only a few weeks from the 14th anniversary of my son's murder. I was 8 month pregnant November 14, 2013, and a student ay SMCC, and coming out of the Buglight Lighthouse art studio after art class, when a still unidentifiedwoman wielding a golf club attacked me, severed my spine, while I was 8 months pregnant, triggered early labour, then killed my son minutes after he was born.

While accusing me of being transgender, screaming "transvestite freak" and "look at that thing, that's Ken's son in a dress"... while I was 8 months pregnant.

My house at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, July 4, 2013, photo taken because we had just finished building a baby room on the back. vs My house August 8, 2013, when the same group of people (yes group, the golf club woman was not alone when she attacked November 14, 2013, nor was she alone with her second attack July 2016.) who murdered my son and crippled me, arrived the first time with a backhoe that they used to drive over my house, during a time of day that I normally was home asleep... I had to work a different shift at the Waffle Cone Pizza Food Truck at George's Parking Lot by Bill's Pizza at the OBB Peir, that day, otherwise, I too would be at the bottom of a landfill, along with my house and everything I owned that was also in the house. I was 5 months pregnant at the time and have been homeless for just under 14 years, homeless ever since.

The backhoe driver returned November 14, 2013, armed with a golf club, used it to break my spine and smash my baby's brains out on the ground

On November 14, 2013, my son was murdered. I was 8 months pregnant, leaving my college classroom, and just getting into my car, when 3 strangers, a man and two women, armed with golf clubs leapt out from behind my car screaming "kill or be killed, kill the transvestite freaks, kill them all before they kill us! look at that thing! That is Ken's son, look at how it's dressed! kill the transvestite freaks! kill or be killed"... while the bald man and the red haired woman chanted this over and over, the blonde woman, lunged with the golf club.

She severed my spine, I am now a quadriplegic, and been paralyzed arms and legs, and in a wheelchair for 13 years now. She broke my hips, my knees, my legs, ruptured most of my discs, and shattered three of my vertebrae so bad that the shards of bone acted like glass and embedded themselves into my spinal column nerve bundle.

The attack also triggered labour.

My son was born in that parking lot, and he lived only a couple of minutes, before the deranged blonde woman, beat his head in and smashed his brains out, with the same golfclub she had just used to sever my spine and leave me crippled for the rest of my life.

Realizing that I was not transgender, and they'd just murdered a baby, the man grabbed the 2 women and forcibly dragged them away to a 4 door white pickup truck, and they left me there to die.

The FBI told me later, that a few weeks before this attack, and transwoman, had murdered a cis woman, in a parking lot, abou 20 miles away from where I was attacked. The FBI, believes that my attackers, had somehow found out I wrote transgender fiction, connecting my real name to my penname, (my father's name is in fact "Ken", and I do have a brother) and believed that I wrote transgender fiction, because I was myself transgender, even though I'm not transgender. The FBI, believes the attackers, thought I was my brother, pretending to be a woman.

The FBI investigation, into my son's murder, has dragged on for 13 years, and still now in 2026, continues on, with the FBI, still not having yet identified my attackers, and only guessing at what their motive was.

Thus we come to 2014, and the full swing change of the series I write. WHY my series, went from just a transman main character living life, to the full blown Mpreg genre series that it now is today.

Before the attack, I had a chance of having a baby. I don't know. And because I'm in America, I'm too old to adopt. You have to be under 45 years old to adopt a baby. That is the law in America. I was informed this, when we tried to adopt, now that my injuries leave me unable to get pregnant a 9th time.

Thus began my obsessively writing, my transman main character, pregnant. Always pregnant now. Every time. Every story. Stories that now fully focus on pregnancy, labour, miscarriages, babies dying, babies living, raising babies... the whole series, since 2014 has devolved into an outright baby obsession.

Meanwhile, reborn baby dolls were suggested to me by my therapist, and have also become a deeply obsessive part of my life. Because 13 years ago my son was murdered minutes after he was born, because a transphobic bigot mistook me for being transgender, I'm STILL in a wheelchair, struggling to relearn to use my arms and legs, now 13 years later, and I'm still DAILY dealing with police officers and FBI agents who while they are trying to find my son's killer, they are also daily reminding me... oh, yeah, my son was murdered, literally ripped out of my belly, by a transphobe. Who still has not been located and walks free to kill again.

The golfclub woman as she looked during the golf club attack at Southern Maine community college November 14, 2013. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026. If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

The golfclub woman as she looked during the shopping cart attack at Scarborough WalMart July 26, 2016. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026. If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

The 2nd woman as she looked at both attacks, her hair goes all the way down to her knees. She is about 20 to 30 years older then me and would be around 75 to 85 years old now in 2026. If you have any information about the identity of this child murderer's accomplice, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322

Do you know who these two woman who crippled me and murdered my baby, at Southern Maine Community College at 10PM on November 14, 2013, are, and what their connection to the backhoe that drove over my house is? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

I am a legally blind quadriplegic, and low verbal, I have also published 138 novels in the last 48 years. It's not as impossible as people think. The problem being blind and quadriplegic, medically have different meanings then how those two words are used medically.

Fewer than 3% of all blind people see nothing. While 97% people who are classified as fully blind are able to see up to two feet in front of them. Legally blind means I can see more then two feet in front of me but not far enough to see twenty feet in front of me. In my case I can see about eight feet.

Quadriplegic, has varying levels, it means having a damaged nerve bundle in the spinal column causing limited mobility of all 4 limbs, (in my case this was done by a women wielding a golf club, who also beat my 8 month infant's head to pulp on the parking lot tarmak, at the same time she severed my spine with the same golf club; both on November 14, 2013; the FBI investigation into my son's murder and my being crippled has gone on now for 13 years, a few weeks away from 14 years now, and the FBI has still not identified the killer or her motive). Contrary to popular misconception, quadriplegic does NOT mean ZERO movement, it means means limited movement, specifically in means unable to lift arms over head, unable to grip fingers around objects to pick them up, and unable to stand for more then 5 minutes to a time. Because there are so many thousands of nerves in each limb it is actually very rare for there to be 100% no movement, but how much, and to what extent varies by patent depending upon the specific point of injury to the spinal column.

Meaning typing is still possible for over 60% of all quadriplegics.

In my case, it was the lower spine that was severed, cutting off completly my ability to move my right leg, leaving limited feeling in my left leg, and an ability to stand but not walk, with crutches, for the first 9 years. I regained enough nerve growth in my legs by the 9th year to be able to take ten or twelve steps allowing me to get out of bed for the first time since the golf club attack; This in turn lead to me being able to start using a wheelchair, as I was able to sit upright for the first time as well.

Because the shattered vertebrae bone fragments are broken off completly and embedded into the nerve bundle just above my tailbone, doctors were saying I would never walk again, but now at 13 years, I am able to push mu wheelchair like a walker, a distance of almost a thousand steps a day. Though doctors are still doubtful I will ever walk "normally" again, I have proven them wrong, when their said 13 years ago, that I would never walk again at all.

But because of the placement of the damage to my spine, regaining hand use, was always thought possible, it was just a matter of waiting long enough for nerve regrowth, along side daily finger exercises. I was able to continue writing, after becoming quadriplegic, because I still have use of my right thumb, and 2 fore figures of my right hand. And can type 90 words per minute with those 3 fingers.

I however have no wrist strength, elbow strength, or shoulder strength, so I am not able to form a fist, or lift objects, or brush my hair, or my teeth, all thing I have to have my caretaker do. But, those things are not needed for typing. Unfortunately, my pinky and ring fingers are "nerve dead" and drag over the keyboard, and cause horrific spelling errors and typos, which are incredibly frustrating to deal with.

Unfortunately trying to edit errors myself, just makes the errors worse, because those same two fingers drag over the keyboard yet again. Prior to the golf club attack, I rarely had spelling errors; now I got more spelling errors then someone is learning English as second language. Editing is a challenge, that I've had to accept, I simply can not do myself, and I have to hire several editors to help with that.

Low verbal means sounds can still be made, sounds that software programs like Dragon can be trained to recognize and translate, and type into full words. More then half my novels were typed with this method.

I still have a long ways to go before I am anything close to being able to do the things I could do before the golf club woman beat my baby's brains out and shattered my spine. And you know what's more frustrating then how slow mu medical progression has been? The fact that it's been 13 years and the police and FBI are still coming up at dead ends as to who the woman who murdered my baby was, or why she even did it.

My son's 14th birthday is only a few weeks away, but he didn't even get to live long enough to celebrate his 1st birthday, I don't even know why. And I can't wait to regain my ability to walk again, because regaining my ability to walk, means gaining the ability to go outside and start looking for my son's murderer myself instead of sitting at home trapped in a wheelchair waiting for the police and FBI to to find her. So, writing isn't a big priority for me anymore. I only write now, as a way to exercise my hands, in between relearning to walk.

Never let a disability stop you. Plenty of writers, artists, athletes, do not let either blindness, speech impediments, or limited mobility hold then back from perusing their careers.

Do you know who these two woman who crippled me and murdered my baby, at Southern Maine Community College at 10PM on November 14, 2013, are, and what their connection to the backhoe that drove over my house is? If you have any information, please give it to FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207–774–9322 of the Portland, Maine FBI office.

More information about the backhoe attack, my son's murder, my becoming crippled, my becoming homeless, and the FBI investigation around all of it, can be found here.

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All the writing prompts found here on my website, are also available in printed paperback editions, on Amazon.

There are no ebook editions as they are already available digitally here on my website.

The Park Bench Method of Writing 100+ Cozy Fantasy Writing Prompts for NaNoWriMo & NovNov 2025 Finding Your Character’s Goal Through Mundane Moments (Character Creation & Development - NaNoWriMo & NovNov 2025) --with 500+ Writing Prompts! 30 Cozy Fantasy Writing Prompts - June 2025 - 30 Day Edition 30 Cozy Fantasy Writing Prompts, Queer Throuples/Polycules Slice of Life Edition 30 "TRUE COZY" Cozy Fantasy Writing Prompts 🫖 30 More Cozy Fantasy Writing Prompts - June 2025 Writing Character Driven Flash Fiction for NaNoWriMo & NovNov 2025 -with 90 Cozy Fantasy Slice of Life Writing Prompts A shit ton load of daily writing prompts and writing dares to use for National Novel Writing Month, 2025 edition! For the people who had been asking where to find them, the Print Paperback editions of the writing prompts found on my website are available HERE. What's New (Newly Published or Recently Updated or Edited) Wendy C Allen: Old Orchard Beach & Biddeford Maine Dark Fantasy Author Sep 15, 26 12:15 AM Official Home Page Of Wendy C Allen: Old Orchard Beach & Biddeford, Maine's Autistic Artist, Doll Designer, Art Car Builder, and Dark Fantasy MPreg Author Read More Who is Tod Murphy? (updated for Christmas Eve attack 2025) Sep 04, 26 05:04 PM Who is Tod Murphy? (updated for Christmas Eve attack 2025) Read More Phookas Sep 04, 26 10:26 AM Everything you could ever want to know about phookas Read More But is it Omega Verse? Aug 22, 26 12:33 PM Readers have suggested my Quaraun series is Omegaverse... let's find out if it is or not Read More The Egg Question: A Pink Necromancer Short Story Aug 06, 26 08:42 PM After a long day of killing Humans, The UnSeelie Court's pregnant mage contemplates why having sex with the Dragon King does not result in laying Dragon Eggs. Read More Fish, Eels, Storyland, Autism, Becoming a Published Author, Art Cars Jul 30, 26 09:16 AM Fish, Eels, Storyland, Autism, Becoming a Published Author, and Art Cars; a long and varied conversation with ChatGPT5.6 Read More The Cat at the Sea Cave Jul 29, 26 10:02 AM A Pink Necromancer story poem Read More My Elves Are JellyFish Jul 13, 26 01:38 PM My Elves Are JellyFish, and I asked for thoughts from Google vs ChatGPT Read More Is Quaraun gay? | Quaraun FAQs Jun 24, 26 03:43 AM Is Quaraun gay? | Quaraun FAQs Read More The Three-Seventeen Pee Expedition Jun 16, 26 02:33 PM The Three-Seventeen Pee Expedition: A Pink Necromancer Short Story Read More Why I Write (Some Thoughts on Living With Autism) Jun 10, 26 10:45 AM Why I Write (Some Thoughts on Living With Autism) and a look at the history of 144 and 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine Read More How Much Money Do Self-Published Authors Make Jun 08, 26 08:26 PM A Look at How Much Money A Million Books Sold Is Equal To - How Much Money Do Self-Published Authors Make Read More 146 Portland Ave Old Orchard Beach, Maine, FBI Murder Investigation Jun 08, 26 08:20 PM 146 Portland Ave Old Orchard Beach, Maine, FBI Murder Investigation; How Did The FBI Get Involved? Read More The Quaraun Series Prologue May 20, 26 03:11 PM The Quaraun Series Prologue Read More An Introduction to The Pink Necromancer Series May 17, 26 04:47 PM An Introduction to The Pink Necromancer Series: The Adventures of Quaraun the Insane Read More No, Disabled People Do Not Exist To Inspire You May 14, 26 11:01 PM Yes, it is offensive to write disabled characters to act as inspiration to others. or how to write disabled characters accurately Read More Murder Investigation Updates, Old Orchard Beach, Maine May 11, 26 12:25 PM Murder Investigation Updates, Old Orchard Beach, Maine Read More The FBI murder investigation 144 & 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach May 06, 26 07:05 PM The FBI murder investigation of 144 & 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine - Everything we are allowed to publically release Read More Thoughts on Reborn Therapy Dolls After My Son's Murder Apr 15, 26 06:29 AM My 8 month old son was murdered; Thoughts on Reborn Therapy Dolls After My Son's Murder Read More Addressing victim blaming in murder investigations Mar 13, 26 09:40 PM Addressing victim blaming in murder investigations Read More The Tussah Day Serenade Feb 16, 26 07:44 AM The Tussah Day Serenade, a fiction short story poem - LGBTQAI+ FICTION | The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane | TransMan MC | Read More Ghosts Beneath the Pink Silk Tent Feb 11, 26 05:11 AM Ghosts Beneath the Pink Silk Tent Read More An Existential Crisis Feb 11, 26 05:09 AM An Existential Crisis 🌸{A Pink Necromancer Triple Drabble} 🦄🌸 Read More The Moon Goddess Laughs From The Rooftops Feb 11, 26 05:05 AM The Moon Goddess Laughs From The Rooftops Read More 10 Years of Injustice: Tackling Radical Church Extremism Feb 11, 26 04:29 AM 10 Years of Injustice: Tackling Radical Church Extremism Read More How Did The FBI Get Involved? Feb 10, 26 10:02 PM How Did The FBI Get Involved? Read More Don't Be A Stalker Feb 10, 26 09:14 PM Don't be a stalker Read More That Afternoon When Quaraun Got Stuck In a Crab Trap Feb 10, 26 03:46 AM That Afternoon When Quaraun Got Stuck In a Crab Trap : A Pink Necromancer Fiction Short - The Adventures of Quaraun the Insane Read More Springtime by the River Feb 10, 26 01:37 AM Springtime by the River Read More Gloom Blob of Doom: The Dreadful Dripping of the Doom Blob of Gloom Feb 10, 26 01:07 AM Gloom Blob of Doom: The Dreadful Dripping of the Doom Blob of Gloom, a fiction short Read More BoomFuzzy's Chowder Dilemma Feb 10, 26 01:03 AM A Pink Necromancer Dystopian Cozy Fantasy Culinary Fiction Short Read More Never Forget Feb 09, 26 04:46 PM Never Forget: My Son Was Murdered - The Killer Walks Free - Your Child Could Be Next Read More Writing Blind Characters Feb 09, 26 04:29 PM I am legally blind and I write a legally blind character, this is how I do it... Read More IMPORTANT NOTE: All the writing prompts found here on my website, are also available in printed paperback editions, on Amazon. There are no ebook editions as they are already available digitally here on my website. January February 2026 Updates If you are one of (as of December 2025, the now more than ten thousand) daily visitors, who arrive here daily in search of SEO advice, I made this page for you: My response to the alarming spike in traffic to my "SEO" pages. aka I am getting Weird Spike In Google Traffic For SEO & Content Writing & Marketing keywords and search terms even though this is a Yaoi and Gay Romance website that has absolutely nothing to do with SEO or Content Writing or Content Marketing What the fuck? The Park Bench Method of Writing Receiving death threats over a septic tank and a little brown log cabin, but I own neither a septic tank nor a little brown log cabin... what even are these thugs talking about? I am a mute/none verbal wheelchair user and I just had an encounter over my wheelchair, but being mute had no way to defend myself. Crazy Woman Just Attacked - No Clue Why or Who She Is (August 14, 2025) Articles For Writers on How To Write & Publish A Rapid Release  Series Want to write like I do? You want this page: Writing Mindset Shift & Lester Dent vs Kishotenketsu w/Thoughts on Being one of Dr. Lindstrom's 200 PenPal Students (NaNoWriMo & NovNov 2025) plus Polyamory Beyond Fetish: Writing Multi-Partner Relationships and Writing Blind Characters Plus Elves and Very High, High Elves  VS Unicorns and Phookas and Demons and also What exactly makes an Elf an Elf? (What is the definition of an Elf?) but Noses, Penis Piercings, And Rapunzel Hair and Need Help Defeating Overpowered Fantasy Wizards? + Wizards and More Wizards and Even More Wizards and Still More wizards and MAKE VILLAINS EVIL AGAIN: A WRITER’S BATTLE CRY TO RECLAIM THE DARK SIDE Have you ever considered: How Things In Your Life Affect Your Writing or Currency In Worldbuilding and The Dangers of World Travel or  Dragging a Body Through The Snow and Talking While Falling Asleep or Worldbuilding MoonQuakes and Disabled Characters for Fantasy Writers or I have everything but the kitchen sink... wait, how'd that kitchen sink get in my pocket? Writing Absurdist Fantasy Books but How long does it take to reach 1667 words? and 50k in one day - is it possible? plus What is the average typing speed? plus What (self-publishing) platform pays the most (for books)? My top 3 picks. Comparing my results from different places. and Knowing what to include when describing the surroundings of a scene also Validation Is a Cult and Open Strong, Stay Loud and  Where are the writers who love writing? plus Self-Publishing Success: Does Anyone Ever Succeed at Self-Publishing? and Where To Get Writing Ideas? and Writing What You Know Might Not Be What You Think It Is and Why I do not attend writing groups...are they all like this or just the ones in Maine? but also Don't Forget To Just Write  because Yes, You Can! Plus The Park Bench Method of Writing (with 10k writing prompt list) or The Park Bench Method of Writing (just the article) plus: How did you build your audience? Not online, that's for sure. aka How to sell ten million books aka How I sold ten million books. Need Writing Prompts? For Anyone Looking for: The "haunted car" people call The GoldenEagle & my response to Stephen King's illegally filming my family and farm in his movies? My response to MUFON's Amphibious Aliens? My response to Coast to Coast AMs Arrival in my yard? Back to the Home Page Wendy Christine Allen, Old Orchard Beach's Autistic Author, Artist, Illustrator, & Art Car Designer Counting Down to the 2028 50th Anniversary of my first published book (September 23, 1978) Yes, I am aware there are a lot of spelling errors on this site. No, I likely will not be fixing most of them. I have been quadriplegia/paralyzed arms and legs since November 14, 2013; As of 2026, I have regained use of two fully functional fingers on my right hand, and only stiff limited movement of all remained eight fingers. This causes most of the typos and spelling errors as my near-dead pinky and ring fingers tend to drag over the other letters on the keyboard. Attempts to correct errors, often causes more errors for the same reason. Much of my writing is also speech to text, but I have "profound low functioning, non-verbal kanner's syndrome aka autism aka the rainman type" (that is what the medical diagnosis called it), I have the medically diagnosed retarded type of autism, that medical doctors mean when they say "real and actual autism", I do not have the cool trend self diagnoses tiktok type of "autism". What this means is, in spite of five decades of trying, I have very limited vocal speaking abilities and a lower then average vocabulary, that leaves my speaking ability around the level of a 4 or 5 year old child; I do not know math or money or clocks and. I also, was raised by a Shetland Scottish Grandmother (Helen Ricker Allen) until her death when I was 8 years old, and she did not speak American, she spoke Shetland/Scottish, Shetlandic, which is a Nordic language, different from Scotts Language, not related to Gaelic which is what many Scottish speak, and while classified as a type of Scottish English is is considered "Olde medieval Norse" dialect of Scottish English and spoken by fewer then two thousand people as of 2026. It is the language of Scottish Travelling Gypsies, which is what we racial are. I was 31 years old first time I ever heard American English, and only started to learn American English at 42 years old. Right now in 2026 at 51 years old, I am able to speak American English on around the level of an 8 year old child, and greatly do not understand over 90% of American words, American slang, and American media references. What this means is, OFTEN words you think are spellt wrong (like color vs colour, or traveling vs travelling, are in fact NOT spelt wrong, because I use Scottish spellings) and often when I hear an American word, I spell it phonetically because I do not know the correct American spelling. Likewise we Scottish do not have words like my or your, and so say me and you, in places where Americans would say my and your.  I also use Scottish word meanings, not American word meanings, for example Unicorn means a blood thirsty flesheating shapeshifting sea creature that comes on land and pretends to be a wounded horse to lure in humans to eat, it can only be captured by a virgin. But when I say Unicorn, a word I frequently use, because I write Unicorn folkloric short stories... I find that most Americans connect Unicorns to children's cartoons, gay pride, or swinging sex lives... I struggle to understand who in their right mind thought the most bloodthirsty monster of Scotland folklore was good fodder for children's cartoons or "sex positive" mascots, me thinks Americans need to brush up on the lore of Unicorns using their horns as sword to stabbed people's eyes out, while gallopping through swamps with rows of bloody Human heads hanging from their backs via braids made of Human entrails... really, why did Americans thinks a monster like a Unicorn was fit for children's cartoons or sex positivity? Americans is weird. All this to say... speech to text software, struggles badly with my thick Shetland accent, my slurred Autism speech impediment, and causes additional misspellings and typos because it can not figure out what words I am trying to say. And while I could take the time time to run all of it through a spell checker, that does require better hand mobility then I have, to copy the text from one program to the next and manually click each word, with finger mobility that I simply do not have, but also, most of my time is spent in trying to relearn to walk, and if you are local, you've probably seen this as I'm a stubborn bitch who refused to accept the doctor disnosis that I will never walk again, so, I walk around the block every day pushing my wheelchair, refusing to sit in my wheelchair, and... ...it's taking me 13 years to do it, but, I'm not actually able to stand up and make it all the way around the block now, and my focus on trying to relearn to walk is far more important to me, then catering to your pampered arse by fixing spelling errors, when there are far bigger problems to worry about in life, the spelling errors made by a quadriplegic who is typing this with her only two functioning fingers. Also, in recent years, I've watched the internet devolve into a mindless clusterfuck of ChatGPT written everything. Everyone sounds the same online these days, because no writes their own work anymore. Every website out there has become a carbon copy of each other, because they are all be written by ChatGPT now. I think ChatGPT makes a funny thing to chat with in your spare time, so you can laugh at the hilarity of how inaccurate it's responses are... but I am horrified that people are using AI for serious writing, writing they publish and try to pass off as their own. We live in a society where people people are forgetting how write. Heck I can read and write cursive, calligraphy, italic, short hand, and editor's marks, also edit my books by hand diagraming every sentence, and that... start walking around your neighbourhood and ask anyone under 30 if they sentence diagraming IS, let alone how to do it. So yes, I CAN spell check, and no I don't, for anything but my novels and short story collections, I spell check when it matters... and this is a website, not a printed book... but also, I am just getting so damn fucking fed up with endless AI writing online, so, no, I'm not going to fix errors and typos on my website, and you can bitch about that all you want (yes, I do get your messages, I just don't answer anyone in private) but, honey, maybe instead of bitching over my spelling errors, be thankful is still at least one website on the internet that still being written by a Human now in 2026 when ChatGPT writes over 70% of all posts online.

Looking for my annual NaNoWriMo Prompts and Dares? I've been publishing these every year since 2004! Here's,for my 26th year, a shit ton load of daily writing prompts and writing dares to use for National Novel Writing Month, 2025 edition! The Park Bench Method of Writing The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane: Paperpacks & Hardcover Editions on Amazon: Not sure what the series is about?  Check out  The Quaraun Series Prologue and Faeries vs Elves (In The Quaraun Series) A Pink Necromancer World Lore Post and Worldbuilding MoonQuakes and Disabled Characters for Fantasy Writers and How well do I know Quaraun? - Let's find out! to find out more about the plot and lore of the series. Not sure which story to start with? These here are good places to start, to get a good introduction to the three main characters: Absinthe Slushies: An Ode to Frozen Green Fairy Wine Bone Dice BoomFuzzy's Chowder Dilemma The Cellar's Forgotten Treasure Chaos in The Lighthouse - Shattered Panes, Shattered Minds The Cliff-Side Temple Control or Protection? A Dark and Stormy Night Drying Herbs Excited For The New Baby Five Ways To Save Money in Las Vegas The Golden Dragon Keys Herons in the Dunes If your ass ain’t freezing or your brains ain’t scrambled, you’re ain’t really trying Kiss Me Fuckin' Arse - Just Another Day in the Ice-Laced Ruins of The GodForsaken City Lens and Light Maintenance Macaroni and Cheese: A Creamy Pasta Dish Drenched in Melted Cheese, Often Topped with Breadcrumbs- It's Never That Easy A Map Worth More Than Gold The Morning After a Night of Teaching Wizards To Gather Magic With Cards Necromancer of the Parched Sands in the Desert of Diona Necromancy-A Day in the Life of a Bumbling Necromancer-Again Nightmare Nook Paddlewheel Maintenance The Phooka's Dragon School The Red Hakama Springtime by the River Spirit-Walk Slippers Sticky Rice, Bare Fingers, and Slippery Chopsticks The Sweet and Sour of Lemons The Terror Bird 3 Perspectives on an Apple The Valuable Mystery of the Talking Saloon Door and How We Nearly Got Shot Over Stale Tacos Vendetta over Vittles A Very Important Clump of Grass Wagers and Wiles in the Godforsaken City The Washer Woman & The Fae Weather Forecasting Stones You Never Know What Info You Might Pick Up in the Afterlife aka Quaraun's Near Death Experience (A NDE Fiction) Or if after reading those, you still are looking for more free to read stories, there are over three thousand of them on this site, too many to list here, but here a few dozen to get you started... ...you can just jump in and try reading some of the free to read online stories first before committing to buying the books: Abyssal Addlepated: Stupid and Confused All the roads are gone Alone Ancient Coin Hoard Unearthed Angry Ocean Waves at Sunset The Arrival The Art of Destroying a Human Village for Fun and Profit At the High Priest's Altar Back At The Tavern and Still No Shrimp The Bandits and the Pink Necromancer The Banshee Sisters: Bean-Nighe and Ben-Neeyah In the Swamp of Death The Beacon Room at the Top of the Black Tower Lighthouse The Beauty of a Silk Moth Hatching The Beginning of the End Bellicose: Warlike! Aggressive! Hostile! Beneath a crimson sky, the silk weaver wove pink silk. Beneath Malevolent Stars The Black Sock, Again Blizzard The Boat Fiasco The Book Burning Maggots, a You Can't Spell Hatred Without Red Hats BoomFuzzy's Gingerbread House from Hell The Brownies & The Witch, or Why Faeries Don’t Wear Socks The Bumbling Pursuit of The Pink Necromancer Candied Nightmares The Candle Con in Ember Hollow The Candy Corn Unicorn Captured By The Lich Lord The Cast Iron Frying Pan Cattail Pollen Spaghetti with Wild "Oregano" A Chilly Light Drizzle Becomes Snowfall on the Shore Chocolate Bliss Chocolate in the Neon Shadows Christmas in 40th Century Dystopia Christmas With The Krampus Family The City of Death Clam Digging in the Rain The Clock Ticks Away Clotheslines, Games, and the Village Code Ghosts Comet Fall Snow Day Blitz Conundrum in the Bazaar Corsets, Elves, and Undead Faeries Crabapples in the Rain Cranberry Muffins The Crooked Dice The Crows Are Restless Crullers and Curses at Midnight The Curse of the Liquid Gold The Cursed Mirror Dangerous Tides {A Pink Necromancer Drabble Dozen, featuring Etiole} Dark Damp Basement A Day At Witch Pond & Fleeing To The Forest Deadly Shores of Noodle Beach The Demon Cultists and The Coming of The Darkness The Demonic Music Box Desolate Nostalgia on a Frozen Shoreline The Diamond Forest in the Bio Dome The Disbelief of Humans Discovering A Floating Castle Dismal Day at the Street Market The Doors' Dark Secret - A Wedding In A Zombie Apocalypse Dreams of Purple Pearls The Drunk Moon Elf Echoes of the Glass Forest Echoes of the Unseen An Eclipse in the Faerie Glen An Eclipse Looms Tonight An Eerie Discovery Eerie Symbols in the Snow The Egg That Was Not an Egg The Elf With Crippled Hands Ember Enable The Enchanted Map Encountering ghostly apparitions in the swamp Evil Eggplants Stalking Outside Evil McEvil of The Twirly Moustache Existential Crisis Perspectives - 3 Perspectives on an Existential Crisis Exploring the Swamp's Forgotten River A Fall in the River A Field of Poppies On The Road To Witch Pond 15 Drabbles About Being Transgender The First Flicker of Dawn Fishing in the Rain Five Ways To Save Money in Las Vegas Fizzy and Frigid A Flapdoodle Wizard’s Duel Fleeced for Fizz Fog & Peach Melba Toast After Last Night's Rain Footprints In The Sand Forest Kings and Their Antler Crowns The Fragrant Smoke of Flavoured Herbs Freshly Baked Sugar Cookies The Frilly Nest of Panic A Garden of Pink Chrysanthemums Get your hands off my dress! GhoulSpawn & The Cultists GhoulSpawn Said The Moon Don’t Laugh GhoulSpawn's Toasted Marshmallow Magic A Glass of Fresh Milk Gloom Blob of Doom: The Dreadful Dripping of the Doom Blob of Gloom Glumpish, Grumpy, Sullen, Gloomy Golden Field, Pink Glories The Golden Mask The Graveyard That Ate the Living The Great UnSeelie Court Swindlers He Always Comes Back Heirloom Tomatoes Help! He's trying to feed me! The Herd Approaches The Howl on Silent Moor How to Create a Literary Empire with Just Your Bum Poems How To Kill a Lich How to Hijack a Human Supply Train Without Getting Shot How to Overthrow an Entire Settlement Without So Much as Lifting a Finger I Need To Feel Safe Ignoramus — An Utterly Ignorant Crowd of Humans IkuTursu's Cursed Depths of the Swamp Where Pine Boughs Whisper Incandescent Shadows Over Driftwood Bay The Infected Survivor Inner Fortitude Insidious Love Invigorating Cool Air Iron Hooves and Burning Roads, Krampus on Wheels The Ivory Tower of Greed The Jar of Pickled Toes Jibber Jabber Ramblings by the Fire The Jolly Red Lich King Journey Through the Zombie-Infested Swamp on the Blue Monkey Judgement An Ode To The Lunatics Preaching The Rapture of September'25 Kelim and The Necromancer: Finding Finderu Kelim Meets Quaraun The Insane Lanterns Over the Faerie Glen Leaving Your Bed Messy Isn't Exactly the Apocalypse The Leprechaun of The Deep North A Lich's Lament For a Mortal Lover Growing Old A Lich's Reflections On Escaping The Swamp of Death The Lich's True Form Revealed The Lighthouse’s Glass-Eyed Horror The Lighthouse Keeper The Lighthouse That Leapt, Space Dock 13's First Jump Through Space The Long Road The Loot Tree Lord of the Hive Lost In The Forest of No Return-Trying To Find Directions The Lost Library and The Snowglobe The Lotus' Silent Prayer on the Sandy Shoreline Lover's Triangle Make tea and go for a rainy forest walk Maple Cotton Candy Served as a Topping on Vanilla Ice Cream A Market Day Disaster Market Day Weekend - Three Days In The Life of The Pink Necromancer Marsh Serenity Reflection Mayonnaise Meeting Mallac Melt, Ya Safe With Me The MerMan's Wrath Milkweed Meadow Mint, Madness, and Motor Parts The Mischief of the Purple Unicorn Misplaced Utensils and the Cascade of Confusion Monsters & Mayhem: How Black Tower Became Pink (8+ Parts) The Moon and The Drowned The Moon Goddess Laughs From The Rooftops The Moon That Hungers The Moon and The Mirror Morning Sickness at The Shattered Stein (TW: MPreg Yaoi) A Mysterious Door No Goldfish, Today? No Place for Birth The Noodle of Power Not Little Red Riding Hood Obsessive Love-Dangerous Love An Ode to My Shattered Sanity Ominous One River In Three Perspectives Open Grave An Ordinary Day A Path of Twisted Trees A Peaceful Night on the Tundra The Peaceful Shores of Noodle Beach Phantom Tides Pickling Perfection Pickles, Panic, & Permafrost The Picnic Pink Marabou Trimmed Rainbow Leg Warmers, a Purple Feathered Black Leather Codpiece, and an Emerald Green Overly Fluffy Scarf The Pink Necromancer's Deceitful Carpet Weave Pink Sheep, Cheesy Burritos, and The Grim Reality of Zombies Pliable Clay on the Potter's Wheel Pocket Lich Unleashed: Quaraun Murders Finderu Preparations for the Street Market of the GodForsaken City Psychotic Dead Things Quaraun's Beauty Makeovers Quaraun's Candle Business Quaraun's Irritable Day Quaraun and The Wandering Turtle City Quarreling Over the Last Slice of Pizza A Quiet Day on The Blue Monkey The Quiet Evening in the Pink Silk Tent A Quiet Evening In The Rain A Quiet Night on The River A Quiet Place To Sweep A Quiet, Relaxing Foot Rub The Rain-Drenched Alley Raining Cats & Dogs Readers vs Readers, What Really Makes a Reader, a Reader? Remove! The Return of ZooLock The River Boat Man-Woman The Sacred Pink Secret (TW: Mpreg Yaoi) Safety and Emergency System Activated. Please Being Calm Santa's Floating Dead Body Santa's Letter To Satan The Screaming Contest The Seagull Sea Slugs and Clam Chowder Bread Bowls Secret Meeting Hidden Behind Closed Doors Shadows on the Clam Flats Shipyard at Dusk The Silence of the Unseen Silks in the Snow The Singing Crabgrass Crabs — A Green Fairy Wine Tale A Sinister-Looking Stone Well Six Days Earlier The Snake's Prophecy of Doom Upon The Fractured Moon A Solitary Black Sock Spinning Dreams in Silk The Soul Eater Spacious Space Spooky Scary Skeletons - A Graveyard Waltz Stillness in the Garden's Chaos Stone Cakes for the Road Survival Preppers Of The Zombie Apocalypse The Swamp of Death The Tavern in the Faraway Town The Temple City of The Green Goddess, Where Every Street Has a Name The Terrifying Cliffs of Noodle Beach, featuring Etiole That Afternoon When Quaraun Got Stuck In a Crab Trap That Big Bad Darkness in His Heart A Threatening Letter Too Busy Cooking Lemon Tarts Toobe's Well-Prompted Apocalypse (A ChatBot Plans Global Domination) The Trade Caravan A Tumble In The River The Vacuous Tavern Fool Waiter, There's A Head In My Soup Wandering Merchant: The Trader’s Cryptic Goods (Part 2 of ShipYard At Dusk) What I Wish I Knew Before Not Becoming an Astrophysicist When a Government Tries to Cover Its Crimes Why the Sea is Salt A Winter Wizard Wishing For Lobster Rolls-Never Make Wishes In The Presence of Wizards WORMS! Wrath of the Sacred Pink JellyFish Yelling at the Snowstorm You've Only Known Our World Through The Eyes of a Madman You trust that nonsense over a map? Zombies Are Not the Worst Thing Here {TW: Love fucking wins} Zwodder: A Drowsy Stupid State of Mind Hmmm... soooo... I was making the above list to ALL the links to EVERY Quaraun story published on my website here, and adding it into the footer of my site, here as you can see, which loads on every page, and then I realized... wait... there are over two thousand Pink Necromancer stories up free to read on my website, I can't put two thousand links on every single page! Whoops! LOL! So, now I'm putting list to ALL the links to EVERY Quaraun story published on my website here on this page instead and just link that page to the footer instead. But also I'll just leave some of the links in the footer, as you can see above. FacebookXPinterestTumblrRedditWhatsApp ShareFacebookXPinterestTumblrRedditWhatsApp The Park Bench Method of Writing

The Park Bench Method of Writing

IMPORTANT NOTE:

All the writing prompts found here on my website, are also available in printed paperback editions, on Amazon.

There are no ebook editions as they are already available digitally here on my website.

Want even more writing prompts?

If anyone contacts you saying 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, is for sale, know that they are lying to you... it is my land, and it has been in my family since 1531... and the ONLY person whom has EVER gone around saying it is for sale, is a woman who the FBI believes to be the same woman who murdered my son.

My son is buried here, and the FBI believes she is trying to buy my land in order to destroy his grave and destroy evidence of his murder.

Since my son's murder November 14, 2013, every year dozens of real estate agent show up all with a story of a female developer who is offering them MILLIONS of dollars for my lot of land that is only 1/4 of an acre and is not big enough to develop.

When shown police sketches of my son's murderer, the real estate agents say "Yes, that's the woman who hired me to buy 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine", but then the woman disappears and the real estate agents never hear from her again... all contact information she gave them turns out to be fake.

The woman who murdered my son, is DESPERATELY trying to buy 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine... this is the woman to watch out for... and this is what she did:

Looking to find out more about my son's murder, that information is on these pages:

• How did the FBI get involved?

• Never Forget my son was murdered

• Do you know who this woman is? And no 146 Portland Ave is not for sale.

• Thoughts on Reborn Therapy Dolls After My Son's Murder

Answering the questions:
Can you give me links to the news reports of your son's murder? 
and
Why can't I find any news reports about this?

Maine has well over a thousand murder cases that have never been in the news.

I found this out after my son was murdered November 2013, and a year later I found out it had never been in the news, even though I was hounded for weeks by news people. I went to each of the over a dozen TV stations and newspapers whom had showed up at the hospital and asked why they had never published any report after all the trouble they had gone through to (in some cases illegally) het into the hospital to interview me.

in every case they said some version of "well, it just wasn't news worthy, there was nothing we could use to get views". Really? These were big news stations, channel 13, 6, 8, Portland Press Herald, Bangor Daily...

What exactly was it they claimed was "not news worthy"?

I'll tell you.

On November 14, 2013, my son was murdered. At Southern Maine Community College in the parking lot of The Buglight Art Studio beside the Spring Point Lighthouse.

I was 8 months pregnant, leaving my college classroom, and just getting into my car, when 3 strangers, a man and two women, armed with golf clubs leapt out from behind my car screaming "kill or be killed, kill the transvestite freaks, kill them all before they kill us! look at that thing! That is Ken's son, look at how it's dressed! kill the transvestite freaks! kill or be killed"... while the bald man and the red haired woman chanted this over and over, the blonde woman, lunged with the golf club.

She severed my spine, I am now a quadriplegic, and been paralyzed arms and legs, and in a wheelchair for 13 years now. She broke my hips, my knees, my legs, ruptured most of my discs, and shattered three of my vertebrae so bad that the shards of bone acted like glass and embedded themselves into my spinal column nerve bundle.

The attack also triggered labour.

My son was born in that parking lot, and he lived only a couple of minutes, before the deranged blonde woman, beat his head in and smashed his brains out, with the same golfclub she had just used to sever my spine and leave me crippled for the rest of my life.

Realizing that I was not transgender, and they'd just murdered a baby, the man grabbed the 2 women and forcibly dragged them away to a 4 door white pickup truck, and they left me there to die.

The FBI told me later, that a few weeks before this attack, and transwoman, had murdered a cis woman, in a parking lot, abou 20 miles away from where I was attacked. The FBI, believes that my attackers, had somehow found out I wrote transgender fiction, connecting my real name to my penname, (my father's name is in fact "Ken", and I do have a brother) and believed that I wrote transgender fiction, because I was myself transgender, even though I'm not transgender. The FBI, believes the attackers, thought I was my brother, pretending to be a woman.

The FBI investigation, into my son's murder, has dragged on for 13 years, and still now in 2026, continues on, with the FBI, still not having yet identified my attackers, and only guessing at what their motive was.

Oh yeah, and I've been quadriplegic for 13 years.

oh yeah one more thing, same trio, they also found out where i lived in Old Orchard Beach and drove a backhoe over my house as well.

146 Portland Ave Old Orchard Beach, Maine... July 4, 2013 vs August 8, 2013

I have been homeless and quadriplegic for 13 years, and right now it's just a few weeks away from both my son's 14th birthday and the 14th anniversary of the day he was murdered, both of which happened the same day.

Explain to me what about any of that is "not newsworthy"?

I did find out WHY it was deemed not newsworthy. "it would negatively impact tourism" was their reason. The College at Fort Prebble is a tourist destination. The lighthouse at the college is a tourist destination. My house on Portland ave is situated on the primary road to the beach that is a tourist destination.

The news reporters explained to me that, they risked losing their jobs if they publicised "negative news" occurring in these sorts of tourist destination spots.

My son's murder wasn't in the news, because it might cause tourists to stop visiting that lighthouse. That was the reason the reporters gave me.

How often are there things not being reported on just so businesses don't lose tourist money?

How often does this happen? A lot, I've since found out. In trying to find other mothers of murdered children to interact with... I found five others JUST in Old Orchard Beach, whom the murders were not in the news, and all of them happened after my son's murder. I found 2 such mothers in Scarbourogh, their children's murders not in the news. I found over a dozen more in the Bar Harbore area, also all not in the news.

It's a very disturbing trend here in Maine, one that I never would have found out about had my own son not been murdered.

One thing's very clear: in Maine you can get away with murdering a child, if you do it in a big tourist location, because news stations REFUSE to report any crime occurring in tourist locations.

Fuck torists.

I don't give a shit about your precious tourist money.

My son was murdered and I want his killer found... and I am VERY displeased with the deplorable way news stations try to bury child murders in Maine, just to appease tourist funded businesses.

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