Update: April 16, 2022

Tomorrow is Easter.

Easter, like Christmas, Thanksgiving, and Mother's day is one of the worst days of the year. A day that celebrates children and motherhood. On November 14, 2013, while I was 8 month pregnant, and putting bags on the back seat of my car, three still unidentified attackers, brought golf clubs down on my back, breaking my spine and murdering my baby. I am legally blind and almost deaf, so I neither heard nor saw them coming. I read lips, so you must be facing me for me to hear you. Bring legally blind, you also must be less than 3 feet in front of me for me to see your lips, to know you are talking. Because of this it was very easy for them to sneak up behind me while I leaned into my car, putting bags on the seat.

They broke 3 vertebrae in my spine, the shattered bones severing my spinal column, permanently damaging many nerves. Because of this nerve damage I have limited use of my left arm and hand, difficulty breathing, my bladder and intestines no longer function properly requiring adult diapers, massive tremors in both hands prevent me from being able to do basic things like brush my hair or hold a spoon to eat. These are just things from the nerve damage. 

Additionally they broke my pelvis, my hips, and my knees.

I was paralyzed for 5 months. It took me 18 months to relearn to walk. Today I can walk on a very limited basis, aided by a cane, but every step is seeking pain, like lightning bolts going through my leg, across my pelvis and up my spine.

Because of this I was bedridden from 2013 to 2015. And all of that time I had no use of my hands, so I was not online either. And thus was unaware that during that time, a group of locals set to social media to build up massive slanderous rumors about me. They created a huge fairy tale meme of me being an Erotica author, a porn star, a transvestite, a male to female transgender, gay, and an alien abductee. I am none of those things but they spent 3 years, on hundreds of accounts on Facebook and Twitter, many of them fake "Eelkat" accounts where they were pretending to be me, building up this massive slanderous web of lies about me, and I had no idea they were doing it, until October 2021, 9 years after they started doing it.

April 10, 2015 a group of 74 locals, many of them wearing ku klux klan white hooded robes, arrived at my farm. 14 of them held me, Ben, my mother, and one of my 3 younger brothers down on the ice and snow while holding guns to our heads, while the others used cinder block bricks and a metal pole device with wire loops on the end, to beat and behead, 10 of my 12 foster children, then nail their heads to my door. The youngest was 4 years old. The oldest was 16 years old. They chanted "too gay for the family friendly town of old Orchard Beach" while accusing me, my pink Volvo, my pink motor home, and Ben of being gay, transgender, transvestite, and citing that guys were not allowed in Maine.

THIS is what gay haters in Maine do to people they THINK, might maybe, be gay, even though they are not.

No man, woman or child is safe in Maine, so long as these murders walk free. They will kill anything they determine to be gay, even if it is not, as can be seen my the murder of my children.

They also had hundreds of paperback copies of my books, burning them in a huge bonfire on my lawn while calling them gay Erotica and calling mean Erotica author and porn star. (I'm an author, I write a travel blog style series about a homeless man who backpacks his way across Maine, there is no sex in the series. I'm a Mormon, I've never written a sex scene.)

My family was murdered and I am crippled for the rest of my life, because of this group who has been slandering me on social media. But, at the time of these two attacks (November 14, 2013 and April 10,2015) me and my family were unaware of these slanderous rumors the locals of Old Orchard Beach and Biddeford, Maine were spreading not only on Facebook and Twitter, but by word of mouth around town as well.

May 2021, I started walking around town again, for the first time since being paralyzed 9 years ago on November 14, 2013, and it quickly became apparent something was seriously wrong with the locals.

I was unable to walk my dog on Main Street, Bradbury Street, Harvey Street, or Cutts Street Biddeford, where I have lived since becoming paralyzed, but not before gone outside, because of being paralyzed and bedridden and unable to walk until now…

I was unable to walk my dog on Main Street, Bradbury Street, Harvey Street, or Cutts Street Biddeford without being attacked, pushed off the sidewalk by random strangers running up to me and grabbing my cane and using it to push me in the road in front of cars while accusing me of being gay, transgender, or transvestite. Screaming "transvestite freak" while throwing rocks at me. Group of women joggers stopping to surround me and harass me while saying guys aren't allowed on their street. 

October 2021, my Volvo returned to my driveway after 3 years of being completely rebuilt, after the February 2019 attack on it with baseball bats completely destroyed it. Within 5 minutes of starting to repaint it, 2 men showed up in my driveway yelling about aliens and demons and Etoile and because of this I stopped painting fish on the door, painted over the fish and painted a portrait of Etiole instead. 

November 19, 2021 the red haired American woman from the 2016 High Street attack on my navy blue pick up truck, showed up on the porch here on Main Street. 

The location is 409 Main Street, the big white farmhouse Victorian on the 3way corner of Harvey Lane and Cutts street, right at the train tracks. It has 2 driveways one on Main Street and one on Harvey. There are multiple porches. It's the porch on the Main street side, that goes up the driveway alongside the abortive cedar tree hedge, where I park my painted Volvo. That porch is the one this woman shows up on. 

It's an elderly couple and mother in law who live there at that porch.  When they leave for work, this woman shows up when they are not home and stands on the porch bellowing like a fog horn screaming death threats at me, yelling crazy demon and alien slander about Etiole, making the claim of putting a bomb in the tail pipe of my car, screaming about suicide demons and evil eye curses, and yelling about someone named Todd Murphy (I don't know who that is, I get the impression he's a relative or boyfriend or ex of hers or something, but I don't any one by that name, so I don't know who he is. I don't know who she is either.) She looks to be maybe 30s to 40s aged. 

She was here again yesterday. She was bragging that she got a fight started with my mother and the Atwaters on Facebook, laughing about how easy it is to get my mother and her ex fighting and the old woman was giving her hell and telling her to get off the Atwaters Facebook and leave them alone. 

This happened less then an hour after my mother made the claim that a woman of the same short haired blond description, assaulted her and my father at an ATM machine, the blond woman claiming to my mother to be my father's girlfriend, my father claiming he never saw her before. 

All this happened on April 10, 2022, the 7 year anniversary of the murder of my foster children, and the blond woman who was here in my driveway after the ATM attack was bragging the anniversary is why she is instigating the fighting between my parents. 

I did not see the ATM attack, so, I do not know what happened other then what my mother and father are saying. 

I did however see her here in my driveway.

She does not live here. She's shows up in a silver pick-up truck driven by a small skinny blonde man. No one here at this building knows who she is.

There is another blonde woman, older sometimes with her. I do recognize the older woman. She's one of the November 14, 2013 golf club attackers. The one the others who were with her called "Claire". She looks to be in her 60s. Usually wears a blue denim button down man's worksheet as a coat. She sometimes drives a gold Volvo suv around 2004vintage, sometimes a silver Subaru suv, sometimes a mega sized white Nissan 4 door white pick-up truck, and sometimes a pine dark green pick up truck. She frequently has another older woman with her, who calls herself "Kendra" and has very, very long natural red curly hair, sometimes she wears big Janis Joplin glasses and sometimes cyberpunk cyclops lime green glasses, she frequently carries a small white poodle dog. The dog is often wearing either a purple dragon or a black skeleton costume. These 2 older women and a younger bald man are the 2013 golf club attackers who murdered my baby. This new younger blond woman and the 5 who are often with her, appear to be their relatives. The FBI believes they are part of a drug gang from Connecticut that call themselves "The Cyr Clan". According to the FBI the Cyr Clan was a gang that my uncle Bruce was involved with back in the 1960s in Boston before I was born. The FBI believes Bruce pissed them off in the early 2000s and that's what brought them up here to Maine.

The FBI believes they were after either one of Bruce's daughters or one of Bruce's sisters with both the November 2013 and April 2015 attacks.

One of Bruce's daughters also lives on Portland Ave in Old Orchard Beach and she also has a pink motor home. So there are TWO pink motor homes on the same street. This particular daughter of Bruce IS in fact a porn star. She's a pole dancer for a top less bar.

In 2016, there was another large scale attack, near duplicate to the April 10, 2015 attack. I never talk about it because it didn't happen to me. It happened to Bruce's daughter across the street from me. The attack on her family was bigger, bolder, and bloodier, than the attack on my family the previous year.

In 2017, a third similar attack happened in Biddeford to one of Bruce's sisters. Again I don't talk about it because it didn't happen to me.

Like I've said before there is A LOT MORE going on, then what you hear me talking about. I don't talk about what has happened to several of my cousins and their families both the Atwater cousins and the Murphey cousins- because it is not my place to do so. That's why you ONLY hear me talking about what directly happened to me personally and never mentioning the rest.

And I've not said everything that happened to me. A lot more has happened to me then you hear about because the FBI has specifically requested I don't talk about specific aspects of what happened to me and my children, because a lot was never released to the public, because they want to see who knows what. Certain things no one in the public should know about and knowing those things marks you as involved. This new young blonde woman KNOWS several of those things that were not released to the public and yells those things. Which means she is VERY INVOLVED with the murder of my children. 

Like I said until summer and fall of 2021 when started walking again for the first time in 9 years, I was unaware of the local gossip that was falsely accusing me of being gay, falsely accusing me of being transgender, falsely accusing me of being transvestite, falsely accusing me of being a porn star, falsely accusing me of being an Erotica author, or falsely accusing me of being an alien abduttee. 

I have lived here since 1975. You people know me. You people knew my murdered children. You people know I'm a cis female. You people know I'm not gay. I have published 138 novels and more then 2,000 short stories since 1978, and I  have sold 27k copies of every one of them to you people who come to my house and buy them in person, so you've read my books and know they are not Erotica. You people know I've been a devoted orthodox LDS Mormon my whole life, and that I've been with Ben for 37 years, so you know I'm not a porn star. 

What is wrong with you people? My family was murdered and I have spent 9 years recovering from medical hell, and I go outside for the first time in 9 years and find you people who know me have all devolved into gay hating, sex spewing, gibberish slandering gossips spreading vile, evil, malicious rumors and lies that you yourselves know to be untrue?

No wonder not a single one of you have helped my family through any of this. No wonder not a one of you ever once visited me at the hospital or my home after I got out of the hospital and couldn't go outside because I couldn't walk. 

You don't see me for 9 years because I'm bedridden and you're all to cold hearted to stop by and check in on me, and you spend that 9 years spinning wild, crazy transphobic, gay hating, sex filled lies about me?

What is wrong with you people?

You all let some stranger, who very likely IS the murderer, convince you of crazy ass slandering lies, that you people know to be untrue. 

You all ought to be ashamed of yourselves. 

Every resident of Old Orchard Beach and Biddeford, Maine,  you all ought to be ashamed of what you have spent the last 9 years doing.

This new younger blonde woman, she's the one who keeps saying my car has a suicide demon in it and yelling about Todd, saying my car caused him to die.

I don't know who she is, but she's the same one who used to show up at 27 High st, also Biddeford and scream "nasty bitch" at me and acuse me of being an Erotica author and porn star. (Which she did during several Witcher 3 livestreams on Twitch, you can see her doing it if you go back and watch my VOD). I am neither an Erotica author or a Porn star, and she had throughout 2016 to 2019 arrived at High st with 5 others, one a blond man with a silver pick-up truck, one a black man with a yellow Mitsubishi with new York plates, one a very obese woman with blond Shirley Temple sausage curls, and the other two hooded men with a navy blue Buick sedan. If you remember the Christmas Eve 2016 livestream when the gang attacked my high st apartment and screaming "transvestite freak" that's them. This that same woman who also slanders me by calling me transvestite and transgender, which I am neither. I am a cis female, I've had 7 miscarriages, and the 1 baby that made it full term was murdered November 14, 2013 by 3 people with golf clubs, who are suspected to be, these same people. 

One day when I went downstairs to get the mail on high st, a mailbox that was in the lobby and you had to go through 2 sets of doors and foyers to get to, she had her hand in the mailbox and when I came out the door she yelled "I wasn't stealing your mail" threw our mail on the ground and ran off.

She knows the Martals, (Aunt Barbara ex, uncle Paul Martal,  the one in prison for building the Boston Marathon bomb in 2013, Mike's father, those Martals) she was staying with them for a few months in 2016. Is somehow connected to Barbara (the one who wrote all those emails in 1997 pretending to be me, when I did not yet have email or internet or a computer at the time, and I had not yet heard of email and didn't even know what email was, back when Barbara wrote all those alien abduction emails about Etiole and pretending I wrote them.)

She has short straight blond hair and sometimes dyes it dark red or purple. I know she follows both me and my mom and most of the Atwaters and my 3 younger brothers (though not my 2 older brothers as the oldest is in prison and the 2nd oldest is dead) on Facebook because she keeps saying that "I read on Facebook…" when she's in my driveway.

She shows up at Walmart to yell at me sometimes, and sometimes shows up while I'm walking Mickey. She talks about Etiole and White Monkey a lot when yelling, which is strange because that's stuff Brucie and Daddy used to write in their letters to Bishop Morgan back in Cape Elizabeth in 1990s. 

I'm not the one who calls him Etiole that's always been Bruce and Barbara who did that. I know his real name and use his real name.. They don't know his real name. And my father is only one who uses the term White Monkey. The white monkey was Helen Pearlys pet back in 1970s, it had nothing to do with Etoile, I don't know why he keeps saying it does.. My father is the only one who ever makes that connection. I've never called Etiole a demon or alien, again that has always been my father, Barbara and Brucie who said the alien and demon stuff. I don't believe in aliens or demons, but they do. (Etiole if you don't know is a local elderly homeless man who has backpacked around New England since 1953, and since 1978 I let him camp on my farm in Old Orchard Beach when he's in the area. He's covered with scars from WW2 and they call him an alien and demon because of his scars. They refuse to believe he is a human, which just goes to show how absolutely stupid they are.)

In November an elderly man came over and started asking me why I was emailing him about Etiole and I'm not, I don't use email. He said he was getting over 300 emails a day about Etiole all claiming to be from me. He said there are hundreds of email addresses getting copies of this email. You remember when Barbara and Brucie used to send emails back in 1997 claiming they were from me but we didn't have computer or internet back then? I think it might be Barbara sending those emails again like she did back then. I can't think of who else could be doing it.

This sometimes blond, sometimes red hair, sometimes purple hair woman, also mentions these emails when she is in my driveway yelling at my Volvo at 409 Main street. 

FBI agent Andy Drewer has found and shut down, so far 27 Facebook accounts, all pretending to be me. He said all of them were owed by Brucie. These fake "Eelkat" accounts appear to be the source of a lot of what this blond woman says and is suspected that she may be one of the people behind writing them.

Keep in mind, Brucie is dead. He may have started those Facebook accounts, but he ain't the one writing them. He died 3years ago.

Mervin Bruce Atwater died from Covid19 on November 24, 2019.

The fact remains you ARE impeding an FBI investigation into the murder of my family, and only someone involved would have any reason to do that. ONLY someone connected to the murderer would have a motive to try to stop the FBIs investigation. That makes you an accessory to murder. You make yourself look VERY GUILTY of being involved every time you spread slanders about me, my car, or Etiole. 

Do consider that the source of your slander in all likelihood is the murderer, please tell FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322 at the Portland FBI office on Middle street, the name of the person who is telling you to slander me.

And now tomorrow is Easter. 

A day when mothers take their children on Easter egg hunts.

My children are dead.

My children were murdered. 

And you people have spent the last 9 years making fun of that.

Think about THAT tomorrow when you are out on Easter egg hunts with your babies.

Think about how YOU would feel if it was YOU. How would YOU feel if it had been your baby who was murdered and this entire town was spreading bullying slanderous lies about YOU.

If you know who this blond woman is, please tell FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322 at the Portland FBI office on Middle street. She is wanted for questioning about her connection to the November 14, 2013 murder of my baby and attempted murder of me, and the April 10, 2015 murder of my foster children and the September 26, 2016 hit and run attack on my car and the February 2019 vandalism to 27 High st apartment building, and the November 2021 attack on my Volvo and the March 10, 2022 attack on my Volvo and the April 10, 2022 ATM attack on my parents. 



Update April 11, 2022: Do you know who this woman is?

This woman that my mother is talking about, have any of you ever seen her? Does anyone know who she is?

It isn't that woman who keeps coming on the porch and yelling at my car is it? Do any of you know who the woman attacking my car is?

The location is 409 Main Street, the big white farmhouse Victorian on the 3way corner of Harvey Lane and Cutts street, right at the train tracks. It has 2 driveways one on Main Street and one on Harvey. There are multiple porches. It's the porch on the Main street side, that goes up the driveway alongside the abortive cedar tree hedge, where I park my painted Volvo. That porch is the one this woman shows up on. 

It's an elderly couple and mother in law who live there at that porch.  When they leave for work, this woman shows up when they are not home and stands on the porch bellowing like a fog horn screaming death threats at me, yelling crazy demon and alien slander about Etiole, making the claim of putting a bomb in the tail pipe of my car, screaming about suicide demons and evil eye curses, and yelling about someone named Todd Murphy (I don't know who that is, I get the impression he's a relative or boyfriend or ex of hers or something, but I don't any one by that name, so I don't know who he is. I don't know who she is either.) She looks to be maybe 30s to 40s aged. 

She was here again yesterday. She was bragging that she got a fight started with my mother and the Atwaters on Facebook, laughing about how easy it is to get my mother and her ex fighting and the old woman was giving her hell and telling her to get off the Atwaters Facebook and leave them alone. 

This happened less then an hour after my mother made the claim that a woman of the same short haired blond description, assaulted her and my father at an ATM machine, the blond woman claiming to my mother to be my father's girlfriend, my father claiming he never saw her before. 

All this happened on April 10, 2022, the 7 year anniversary of the murder of my foster children, and the blond woman who was here in my driveway after the ATM attack was bragging the anniversary is why she is instigating the fighting between my parents. 

I did not see the ATM attack, so, I do not know what happened other then what my mother and father are saying. 

I did however see her here in my driveway.

She's the one who keeps saying my car has a suicide demon in it and yelling about Todd, saying my car caused him to die.

I don't know who she is, but she's the same one who used to show up at 27 High st, also Biddeford and scream "nasty bitch" at me and accuses me of being an Erotica author and porn star. (Which she did during several Witcher 3 livestreams on Twitch, you can see her doing it if you go back and watch my VOD). I am neither an Erotica author or a Porn star, and she had throughout 2016 to 2019 arrived at High st with 5 others, one a blond man with a silver pick-up truck, one a black man with a yellow Mitsubishi with new York plates, one a very obese woman with blond Shirley Temple sausage curls, and the other two hooded men with a navy blue Buick sedan. If you remember the Christmas Eve 2016 livestream when the gang attacked my high st apartment and screaming "transvestite freak" that's them. This that same woman who also slanders me by calling me transvestite and transgender, which I am neither. I am a cis female, I've had 7 miscarriages, and the 1 baby that made it full term was murdered November 14, 2013 by 3 people with golf clubs, who are suspected to be, these same people. 

One day when I went downstairs to get the mail on high st, a mailbox that was in the lobby and you had to go through 2 sets of doors and foyers to get to, she had her hand in the mailbox and when I came out the door she yelled "I wasn't stealing your mail" threw our mail on the ground and ran off.

She knows the Martals, (Barbara ex, uncle Paul Martal,  the one in prison for building the Boston Marathon bomb in 2013, Mike's father, those Martals) she was staying with them for a few months in 2016. Is somehow connected to Barbara (the one who wrote all those emails in 1997 pretending to be me, when I did not yet have email or internet or a computer at the time, and I had not yet heard of email and didn't even know what email was, back when Barbara wrote all those alien abduction emails about Etiole and pretending I wrote them.)

She has short straight blond hair and sometimes dyes it dark red or purple. I know she follows both me and my mom and most of the Atwaters and my 3 younger brothers (though not my 2 older brothers as the oldest is in prison and the 2nd oldest is dead) on Facebook because she keeps saying that "I read on Facebook…" when she's in my driveway.

She shows up at Walmart to yell at me sometimes, and sometimes shows up while I'm walking Mickey. She talks about Etiole and White Monkey a lot when yelling, which is strange because that's stuff Brucie and Daddy used to write in their letters to Bishop Morgan back in Cape Elizabeth in 1990s. 

I'm not the one who calls him Etiole that's always been Bruce and Barbara who did that. I know his real name and use his real name.. They don't know his real name. And my father is only one who uses the term White Monkey. The white monkey was Helen Pearlys pet back in 1970s, it had nothing to do with Etoile, I don't know why he keeps saying it does.. My father is the only one who ever makes that connection. I've never called Etiole a demon or alien, again that has always been my father, Barbara and Brucie who said the alien and demon stuff. I don't believe in aliens or demons, but they do.

(Etiole if you don't know is a local elderly homeless man who has backpacked around New England since 1953, and since 1978 I let him camp on my farm in Old Orchard Beach when he's in the area. He's covered with scars from WW2 and they call him an alien and demon because of his scars. They refuse to believe he is a human, which just goes to show how absolutely stupid they are.)

In November an elderly man came over and started asking me why I was emailing him about Etiole and I'm not, I don't use email. He said he was getting over 300 emails a day about Etiole all claiming to be from me. He said there are hundreds of email addresses getting copies of this email. You remember when Barbara and Brucie used to send emails back in 1997 claiming they were from me but we didn't have computer or internet back then? I think it might be Barbara sending those emails again like she did back then. I can't think of who else could be doing it.

This sometimes blond, sometimes red hair, sometimes purple hair woman, also mentions these emails when she is in my driveway yelling at my Volvo at 409 Main street. 

FBI agent Andy Drewer has found and shut down, so far 27 Facebook accounts, all pretending to be me. He said all of them were owed by Brucie. These fake "Eelkat" accounts appear to be the source of a lot of what this blond woman says and is suspected that she may be one of the people behind writing them.

Due to the incident yesterday it is now also believed that she is the mystery blond woman who pretends to be my father's girlfriend and harassed my mother for no reason other then to get a laugh on watching my mother fight with my father (something they do quite violently in public places, in stores, just everywhere.)

If you know who this blond woman is, please tell FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322 at the Portland FBI office on Middle street. She is wanted for questioning about her connection to the November 14, 2013 murder of my baby and attempted murder of me, and the April 10, 2015 murder of my foster children and the September 26, 2016 hit and run attack on my car and the February 2019 vandalism to 27 High st apartment building, and the November 2021 attack on my Volvo and the March 10, 2022 attack on my Volvo and the April 10, 2022 ATM attack on my parents. 



Update: April 10, 2022, big violent attack, as police and FBI expected.

Today is the 7th anniversary of the murder of my family. Remember I said to watch who does what today?... My father just beat the hell out of my mother, tried to kill her. She is right now refusing to call the police. My mother claims she caught my father with a girlfriend he's had for several years now. But near as I can tell, all he did was stop to tell some random stranger how to use the ATM machine. Note, they got divorced in 1994, my mother left my father for another man, left the other man for another man after that, and left the next man for Wayne. She's been with 2 other men (possibly more) since Wayne. She has not been a part of my father's life for 30 years, but feels the need to control his life and harass him on extreme violent levels. If he does have a girlfriend, so what? She left him 30 years ago.

Wayne died during the cat court case, the 2nd one, when he sued my mother for stealing his cats and putting them in my motorhome. Wayne's father, 8 of his cats, and then Wayne himself each died a few weeks apart all from rat poison. Wayne's daughter sued my mother claiming my mother put rat poison in their food.

The fbi believes my mother did kill Wayne and his cats and believes that's why she put his cats in my motorhome. Fbi believes my mother was one who called police April 10, 2015, expecting them to arrest me, take the motorhome, and return the cats to her. She did not expect police to take cats. All the harassment and vandalism of my mom's cars is believed by fbi to be Wayne's daughter friends and relatives and family.

My family, my children were murdered in 2 attacks, one on November 14, 2013 and one on April 10, 2015, both attacks are believed by the FBI to have been attacks that were intended on my mother and the people hired mixed me and her up.

April 10, is my mother's father's birthday by the way, David Henry Atwater, it's WHY she does everything she does, all her wild crazy vandalisms to people on April 10 every year since the 1950s.


April 6, 2022 update, as the attacks on my family and property continue and now more people are in the hospital

Daddy has sepsis and they keeping him in hospital for a few days.

Sepsis is very bad.

That's what I had.

You can die a few hours after it sets in if not treated.

When I was in the hospital in 2014.

That's why I was in the hospital.

I had surgery for it in march 2015.

That was the surgery on my arm.

Sepsis was in a major artery in left arm to heart. 

Side effect from when I was in hospital November 2013 when I was in wheelchair and February 2014 when I was on crutches relearning how to walk. Doctors was focused on my hip and not my spine. They didn't find the source of infection until until the mri in June 2016. 

Sepsis is why I can't walk without cane and why my lungs are messed up and why I have tremors and can't use my hands good anymore. Sepsis infection was so back it damaged my nerves. I was scheduled for spinal column surgery September 2016, they sent me to a neurosurgeon who was supposed to be top brain surgeon in New England and he did more mri and then canceled surgery because damage to my vertebrae (from golf club attack November 2013, which is what caused all of this, including the Sepsis and is the attack that brought the fbi here they think Mark wife did it but college had no security cameras at the bug light parking lot, they investigating Mark family, Barbara family,  and Brucie family. Charges of murdering my baby and attempted murder of me) is so bad. Shattered vertebrae bone fragments are severed into my spinal column nerve bundle at the sacroiliac joint where the hip and pelvis connect to spine. Neurosurgeon said he can't operate because of how nerve damage is, said if he removed bone fragments I would be paralyzed from neck down. But that is also when the source of Sepsis infection was found to be in my spine and not my hip, and that is when it finally went away because they were able to target the correct place to fix the infection.

Mark’s wife is the #1 suspect the FBI is watching, because, according to the FBI, this mysterious Mark guy, whom I have never met, never heard of prior to this, have never talked to, and have never seen, so I have no clue who he or his wife are… according to the FBI, he is friends with my mother, but only via her FaceBook account, where she hired him to put in a septic system, then gave him MY address in Old Orchard, while making the claim that SHE owned both MY land and MY motorhome, and when he asked for a picture of her so he would know who she was, she gave him a picture of ME, not herself.

According to FBI agent Andy Drewer THIS is the reason why the backhoe was driven over my house August 8, 2013 and why the golf club attackers attacked me on November 14, 2013.

According to the FBI, my mother was trying to get my land so she could sell it to use the money for a down payment on a house in Kennebunk and she used this Mark guy as her pawn to do it, by fighting with him on social media using “fake EelKat” accounts to convince him that he was dealing with me, even though I had never heard of him before.

According to the FBI, my mother started sending his family death threats, in the same way she is currently sending Todd Murphey’s family death threats, and that this is why Mark’s wife attacked with the golf clubs, murdering my baby and crippling my spine. According to the FBI, Mark’s wife thought she was attacking my mother and was unaware that both my mother, her sister Barbara, and her brother Bruce’s wife Doris were all impersonating me, using 27 different “fake EelKat” FaceBook accounts to scam Mark’s family about a septic system.

This was confirmed by the Old Orchard Beach police in October 2016, when Mark attacked my mother in person and was arrested by OOB police, that day. He made the claim, that she, my mother, was me, but the officers in question, Robin and Will, both know me and my mother and informed Mark that this was not me that he was fighting with, it was my mother, to which he said this was the woman he had been dealing with since June 2001 who had called herself EelKat in every correspondence. The police showed Mark pictures of me and he said he had never seen me before and had no clue who I was.

This event October 2016, is when both the police and FBI started expanding their investigation, now looking for people who were friends of my mother, her sister Barbara, and her brother Bruce, and that is when they found the identity of long time stalker and bomb builder Kendra Silvermander who turned out to be a FaceBook friend of all 3 of them.

After Mark’s gang found out October 2016 that I was NOT the person they had been fighting with online, but rather it had been my mother impersonating me, the attacks on my family stopped but the attacks on my mother’s family started February 2017 when a road grader drove 75 feet up her driveway and flattened her car. Since then this event was repeated with 3 more cars.

In August 2021, My mother and her sister began impersonating me on FaceBook and with emails, yet again, and as they had done in the past, used my friend Etiole to do it. Once again, calling him a demon and an alien and a cryptid, and once again pretending to be me, they wrote a lot of emails and started mass spam sending them to every Maine email address they could find, at a rate of sending them to several thousand people a day.

I found out about this in November 2021, after Etiole was shot, gunned down by 6 people at Rotary Park in Biddeford, Maine on November 21, 2021, by people who claimed to be from Scarborough, Maine and claimed to be the mother and in laws of some guy named Todd Murphey.

I still have no clue who Todd Murphey is, but apparently he used to work with my mother and commit suicide recently and my mother and her sister took advantage of his suicide to yet again pretend to be me, and this time, calling Etiole a suicide demon, started harassing this Todd guy’s ex wife, son, and mother on FaceBook and via emails while pretending to be me. Which caused these people to show up at my 409 Main Street/Harvey/Cutts street Biddeford apartment to vandalize my car and cut all the wires off the apartment building, not once, but twice: on Thanksgiving day 2021 and again on March 10, 2022, because these friends and family of this Todd guy are 100% convinced the nut they are dealing with on FaceBook is me, when in fact, the one they are dealing with is no me, but rather my mother yet again pretending to be me.

This is also what led to the December 2021 and January 2022 FBI raids in the Cutts Street are of Biddeford, just a few weeks ago, which led to the arrests of 8 people.

Back to sepsis…

On December 24, 2021, my mother arrived here at 409 Main street and stole my father’s 14 medications that he takes for his triple by pass, his kidney dialysis, his diabetes… and then, she took him in her car, drove to his doctor, and told his doctor, he’s not allowed to have medicine, because he has to do what she says.

He has not taken his medicine since December 24, 2021, it is today April 6, 2022, and he is struggling to stay alive.

All of this is because she is hell bent on a house in Kennebunk and doesn’t give a shit that she has caused my baby to be murdered November 14, 2013, my foster children to be murdered April 10, 2015, me to be going through a decade long medical nightmare after being crippled November 14, 2013, 5 of my cars to be destroyed including The real Cristine The World’s Most Haunted Car that Stephen King based his Cristine off of, my house -the one that was in the Thinner movie- to be driven over by a back hoe, and now my father dying in the hospital.

Death and destruction at every turn, and she doesn’t give a shit because, as she puts it: “What are we going to do about Wendy? She can’t keep that land, I need a house in Kennebunk!”

Her obsession with getting a house is utter ludicrous insanity, that needs to be stopped before anyone else dies at the hands of her fucking retarded FaceBook friends who blinding attack, vandalize, and beat up anyone and everyone on her command.

I am so fed up with her blind devotion to a fairy tale house she thinks she has to have, at the expense of the lives of everyone around her.



March 30, 2022, update on yet another attack on my family and land

Police take notice. 


Scam artists have been bringing real estate agents onto my property in attempt to illegally sell my land. They have no right or permission to be here. My land is NOT for sale. If you see them doing it, please arrest them.

These are the Scottish Travellers. They arrive here every summer, harassing my family for four decades now. They are the same ones who drove a backhoe over my house August 8, 2013. The same ones who crippled me and murdered my baby November 14, 2013 with golf clubs, leaveing me paralized with a broken spine ever since. I am cripled with a shattered spinal column since the golf club attack and am bedridden weeks to a time unable to sit up or get out of bed. I have rebuilt my house 5 times in the past 9 years, and their attempts to steal my land and sell it have been barbaric and violent, and icluded a bomb that blew up my house October 18, 2006, and most of my family is now dead, murdered at their hands. These are the same people who cut my 1964 Dodge 330 in half May 10, 2010. They arrived back here September 19, 2020 and illegally cut down most of the trees across my lawn, and arrived again November 19, 2021 and for the last 20 years they arrive every summer with a green dump truck and dump garbage on my lawn. In 2014 they left a pile of garbage 175 feet long, 30 feet wide and 12 feet tall and it cost me $12,000 to have it removed. I am crippled and elderly and there is no one to help me against their harassment.

There should NEVER be anyone other than me EelKat Wendy C Allen (with the painted Volvo) or my partner Benjamin Wildes (with the blue Honda) in my yard at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, where the ink motorhome is parked. If you see ANYONE ELSE or any other car in my yard, please call the police immediately. There is no one else who has permission to be on my land.

My land is NOT for sale, if you see real estate agents, please inform them they are being scammed and the people trying to sell my land are NOT the legal land owners.

The FBI are on the look out for them as are the local police. If you see them in my yard, please notify both the Old Orchard Beach Police Department at 207-934-4911 and FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322 at the Portland FBI office on Middle street.





March 10, 2022 update on the most recent vandalism of my car

This is a copy of the letter that has been forwarded to the police departments involved. For this online edition some parts have been removed (so if you get to a place that seems like the topic changed abruptly, that is why) and the names are removed from the online version, but the version the police have, includes all the full names and contact info of all the people in question. And for those who have asked: yes, the police and FBI have talked to Etiole, they are fully aware of him, his health, his homelessness, etc.

Dear Sirs,

I feel I need to tell you what has been happening as it has gotten very much out of control the past few weeks. It's been slowly escalating for a few years and, if you look at my police record for both Old Orchard Beach and Biddeford, you will see dozens of reports for vandalism of my 1992 Volvo 240 (the painted one) at now 3 apartments in Biddeford, and vandalism of my land in Old Orchard Beach. In the past 6 months, a hyper escalation started with has become very out of control the past couple of weeks.

Last night, my car was vandalized again.  

As these events are taking place in both Old Orchard Beach and Biddeford, I'm giving this same letter to both departments, so events from both towns are listed.

I am Wendy Christine Allen of 146 Portland Ave Old Orchard Beach, Maine and 409 Main Street apartment 101 Biddeford, Maine.

There appears to be someone fairly local impersonating me online, and is raising hell with a lot of local people, inciting them to do very violent physical attacks on me, my Biddeford apartment, my Old Orchard land, and my car.

It's reached the point where I can not go to the store without having my car towed home, because it gets vandalized so bad while I'm n the store shopping. EVERY TIME I go to the store. I've been at a loss to understand why this is happening. I don't know who these people are or why they are attacking. On Thanksgiving day they cut all the wires off the Biddeford apartment building so we had no internet or heat or anything for a while. There is a "redhaired" woman who shows up on the front porch to cream at my car, every time the family who lives in that apartment goes to work. She stopped a few weeks ago, because the man who lives there fell on the ice, broke his shoulder and has not gone to work since. It appears she knows that family who lives there and does not want them knowing she does this while they are not home.

A few weeks ago an old man walked up to me, asked if I was EelKat and then asked me why I kept emailing him, and I said I don't email anyone cause I don't use email. He said some days he gets over 300 emails a day from someone claiming to be EelKat.

 

We are Gypsies, and though I've lived in America my whole life, I know very little of American habits and laws or what specifically to do in this situation. We are the Gypsies who were in Stephen King's Thinner movie and my 146 Portland Ave land was one of the filming locations of the movie and, the cars in the opening scenes were our cars, one of which I still have. I mention this, because, there are two Gypsy clans, The Atwaters (Scottish Travellers) and the Cyrs (Irish Travellers) fighting over my land and the fight centres largely around the fact that it was the filming location of Stephen King's the Thinner movie.

I own the land. From the 1940s it was owned by my grandmother Helen Ricker Allen. She left it to me in her will in 1983. Unknown to me, at some point after 1983, the Atwaters had the land illegally transferred into their names -they steal land this way as a full time career and many of them have illegally deed swapped land in all 50 states in America.

In 2014, I found out they are done an illegal deed swap, when an auction group showed up on my land to sell it. Upon discovery I had been living on the land since 1975 and paying taxes on it since 1983, but my name was not on the deed, the auctioneer (and member of the OOB town hall) cancelled the auction and ordered a town hall meeting to review the situation. Upon investigation it was discovered that when the land went from my grandmother to me, my father signed as "joint witness" and then a year later, went back to the town hall to have my name removed from the deed and his put on it, even though he had no legal write to do so. After that, the record shows that every 3 to 5 years, he and my mother swapped names on the deed, sometimes his name, sometimes her name. The land changed ownership names more then 30 times between 1983 and 2013. 

Because I have severe agoraphobia, I had not set foot off of my land since the 1970s. When it came time to pay the taxes, I gave my father the money and he delivered it to the town hall, or so I thought. In 2014, I learned that in spite of my paying my taxes like clockwork, since 2006, the town hall had no record of receiving any money. It is unclear where the money went. On one hand it looks like my father spent the money and never paid the taxes. On the other hand it looks like he sometimes did pay the taxes but instead of going to the tax office he gave the money to Kathy BR in the permits office and she gave the money to a guy called JB who went to prison for embezzling $3million in OOB tax money from the town hall. JB did not work for the town hall, he was a software designers who built the online banking security for the town hall to direct deposit money to the bank, and according to the FBI the money was going to his bank account not the town hall bank account, but he was only found with $30k not $3million. I don't know the full details, I only know this part, because when we tried to find out why my land was being auctioned this is the info we were given.

In any case, at some point my dad stole my land via just walking into the town hall and asking the desk clerk to remove my name from the deed and put his name on it instead. The whole thing was done illegally and without my knowledge or permission.

There were 3 lands originally. 144, 146, and 146a. My father stole all 3 of them. 144 was auctioned off to the Collard family in 2007, even though I was still living there until 2015 without any knowledge of the auction happening. No one informed me. I've since spoken with the Collards and they were unaware of the situation. They actually bought the land legally even though it was stolen land they had bought, they were unaware the land had been stolen. Everything has been straightened out between me and the Collards, they are not part of the current problem.

My mother owns 146a, but she owns it illegally. She claims it's rightfully hers because my father gave it to her, but, he stole it from me via illegally rewriting the deed, so he had no right to give it to her.

In 2014 and 2015, all the court and legal work was done to restore 146 back to me.

The current situation is my parents are in an active attempt to remove my name off the deed again, like they had done back in 1983.

On a daily basis my mother shows up and first words out of her mouth every day is: "What are we going to do about Wendy? She can't keep that land. I need a house in Kennebunk." to my father.  She started doing this in August, originally bragging that she was going to take my land out of retaliation for my refusal to cast death curses on Chris at work. I don't know who "Chris at work" is. It was one of the names on her list of people she wants me to kill via death spell curses. I was live streaming on Twitch the day she came in yelling about "Chris at work" and my need to kill him for her, so a lot of people online heard her saying these things. I'm a YouTube gamer, I have a livestream going almost daily for 12+ hours a day, so when she comes in, #1 it's breaking and entering because I didn't let her in, and #2 she is interrupting my live streams quite regular so I have hundreds of video footage clips of her saying these things and making these threats. The day she and my father cut the cable/internet wires off my apartment building - I have that on livestream footage as well. My father cut the wires off the house while my mother was ordering him to do it. In November 2021 and again 2 days ago March 9, 2022.

They both make the claim I don't need internet, because I am as they put it "being a bad daughter" because I "won't sell your land and give me the money for a down payment, I need a down payment, you are supposed to give me the down payment money for a house, I'm your mother!"'

As for what happened to my car March 9, 2022 - my father, my father vandalized my car and tried to make it look like my brother  did it. My father stuffed the tailpipe full of McDonald's ketchup packets that he stole from the Biddeford McDonald's where my brother works, which is what caused the fuel line to blow up. I could have died. My car is now being repaired again, for the exact same thing I had to have it repaired for in November 2021. My father tried to kill me and make it look like my brother who works at McDonald's did it so my brother would be blamed. Twice. Once in November 2021 and again 2 days ago.

My father did the same thing in November, because of some guy named Todd who I supposedly convinced to kill himself via may painting a "suicide demon" on my car. There is a picture of Etiole on my car, that is what they are calling "a suicide demon"

I don't know who Todd is, but I assume the Biddeford police know as they did spend a week scrapping the thousands of exploded parts of him off all the houses around Cutts st and South st, after he jumped in front of a train November 19, 2021 at 6:27PM. I was walking my dog and saw him, he was gibbering a lot of wild nonsense stuff like: "fibbery-gibbit-beebydi-booop-bop-boop-bop-booop-beeeeeeeep!" I amused he was either very drunk or very high on drugs or both and was attempting to make train sounds while he ran up and down the train tracks. I thought nothing of it, as he did this on a daily basis all summer long, he was a homeless man who lived in the ravine by the train tressal bridge over the river, the one the police kept chasing out of the black grain building turned storage units. There were 4 people on bicycles, driving circles around him bullying him, teasing him, taunting him daily around 3AM every morning. I saw them while I was walking my dog. It appeared to be his girlfriend and her friends based on the stuff she was yelling at him. Stuff like "You run off with that whore will you! WW I showed you! I killed your dog! Hahahahahaha! I killed your cat! Hahahahaha! And you ain't never gonna see your baby again! Hahahahaha!" I know every one says he commit suicide, but I think he was just running to get away from the harassers on the bikes and was too drunk to see the train. That's certainly what it looked like to me.

THAT was not a suicide, not what I saw happen. That was a man being bullied and chased down by four harassers riding bicycles up the tracks, driving him head on into a train on purpose to try to kill him so they could laugh about it. I wouldn't call THAT a suicide.

Anyways, I didn't know his name or that my mother was best friends with him. Though I had told her about the homeless man being bullied and her response was "Why should I care? It's just a homeless man!" She changed her tune quite a lot after he got hit by the train, and found out his name. The police contacted her or something, when they were trying to find his family. I guess she knew his family on FaceBook or something.

Since his death, me, my car, and my apartment have been attacked on a near daily basis from people who are making the claim that I am online spreading rumours and lies about Todd. I kept asking them who Todd was (because at that point I did not yet know they were talking about the homeless man hit by the train - though I saw him daily for about 4 months, ever since the police kicked him out of the storage until he'd been living in and he lived under the train bridge and in Rotary Park instead - he only ever spoke to me a few times - once to pet my dog and say "they took my dog" and saying "hi" as we passed on the sidewalk. So I never knew his name. He lived in a yellow pup-tent beside the tracks for a while, but one day it was laying out there cut to ribbons by a knife or scissors.)

Even though I only knew him from saying "hi" each night as we passed each other on the sidewalk and I never knew his name until after his death, more then a dozen people have arrived in my driveway (both the Biddeford and Old Orchard addresses) to accuse me and my friend Etiole and the words painted on my Volvo of being the cause of this Todd guy's train death.

They are focusing heavily on the words on my car, which say: "Have information about the murder of my family? Call FBI @ 207-774-9322"

There is a sign in my Old Orchard driveway which says: "Have information about the murder of my children? Call FBI @ 207-774-9322"

On November 14, 2013, at Southern Maine Community College, while I was 8 months pregnant, I was attacked by 3 people with golf clubs. A man and 2 women.

There is no reason for anyone who is NOT involved in the murder of my baby, to be upset about either the sign in my yard or the sign on my car, both of which are nothing more then the FBI phone number with the request for anyone who has information to call.

I don't understand why me asking for people to help find my baby's killer, is seen by my parents as such a huge threat. The only person who who feel threatened by that would be the person who hired the golf club people - Claire, Kendra, and the bald man - who have still not yet been found/caught/identified to this day 9 years later.

Both my mother and my father keep saying and I quote "take that shit off your car, you are only trying to start trouble!" and "get that sign out of your yard, you are only trying to stir stuff up". I'm trying to find the people who murdered my baby and left me crippled for the rest of my life. I'm not doing anything wrong. I'm not trying to cause trouble. How is me asking people to help identify the murderer, me trying to start trouble?

I was paralyzed for 5 months. I had to relearn to walk. I crippled the rest of my life, and my baby is dead. No one should have to live through this type of agony. And no one who commits crimes like this should be allowed to walk free. Would you stand back and do nothing, say nothing, while a criminal like that walked free? How is my asking people to come forward with any information they know, me trying to start trouble? You tell me that!

I'm not allowed to ask for help in finding the psychopath who murdered my baby and left me crippled for the rest of my life? What kind of logic is that?

Someone out there knows the names of these people. The older blond woman they called Claire, the younger blond woman with the Shirley Temple sausage curls, the red haired woman they call Kendra, the white haired man with the green pick up truck, the bald man with the 4door white pickup truck, the new redhaired women who screams on the front porch. These people, this group, they are the ones who were wielding golf clubs and murdered my baby. They are being allowed to get away wit murder and I'll spend the rest of my life demanding justice if I have to. You tell me, how is my asking if you know who they are, don't let them kill again, tell the FBI everything you know, by painting that request on my car and a sign in my yard, me looking to start trouble? My mother's priorities are fucked up. All she cares about is money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money! 

I'm the bed ridden, crippled by multiple attacks. The November 14, 2013 golf club attack, I was almost healed from, but the June 2016 shopping cart attack at my workplace at Scarborough WalMart re opened the 2013 injury and doctors can't operate this time because of the bone shards severing my spinal column. I'm crippled for the rest of my life and no one in this family ever cared. 

Both attacks the FBI wanted to talk to my parents and they refused to talk to him both times. My baby was murdered in the first attack. I was 8 months pregnant and all any of them would do was gibberish about "rosemary baby" and say there was no baby because it was a demon because it was Etiole's. My parents and the Atwaters hate Etiole that much, that they shun the existence of my baby and act like it was never there. That's how much they hate me. That's how cruel and hate filled they are towards me. They spent the last 50 years calling me demon possessed and them saying that is WHY local people attack me and killed my baby and left me crippled for the rest of my life. 

I am in bed 15 or more hours a day, I can barely sit up, I can barely stand up long enough to cook, I have to wear adult diapers since 2013 because half my organs don't work any more because the nerves from those organs to my spine are cut off. My hands shake so bad that it takes me hours to eat a single meal. I can't go back to college, I can't go back to work. But do they care? No. Not my mother. Not my father. Neither of them give a shit. They are both too damned selfish thinking about their own greed to ever once lift a finger to help me. Daddy treats me like a fucking slave and my mother is so far out of my life shunning me because bishop kenning in Saco ward told her too that she hasn't got a clue how bad things are.

I'm not doing a damned thing to any of them. I mind my own business. I write my novels. I don't contact them. I don't talk to them. I don't talk about them.  Someone is clearly pretending to be me online and is slandering me and getting sick of it. My mother flips out about everything thing under the sun and I never have a clue what she's talking about, because I never did or said any of the things she accuses me of. And my father and the Atwaters do the same thing. Some one is out there pretending to be me to get them worked into a frenzy just to sit back and laugh while watching my mother, my father, and the Atwaters be too damned stupid to think. My mother and my father and the Atwaters are all filled with so much pure hatred for me that it takes nothing to convince them to attack me. And whoever it is posting online pretending to be me, knows that and is taking advantage of it. 

They are obsessed with my land, because my mother's father used to tell people there was $7million in gold buried on my land. Several times over the years the Atwaters have invaded bringing with them shovels, pickaxes, and construction equipment, to illegally dig up my land. They've ripped up flowers, dug up bushes, cut down trees... usually they do it while I'm gone to the store, so I come back to find my property ripped to shreds. They've been doing this on an almost yearly basis since Grammy Helen died in 1983. According to what David Henry Atwater claimed, pirates buried treasure on my land in the 1500s. There is ZERO evidence that pirates ever buried anything on my land. Later he changed the story and said that the gold plates of the Book of Mormon Part 2 were buried on my land, this time he claimed an angel from god told him. So the Atwaters have multiple excuses for why they arrive to dig everything up, but it's always that they are gold crazy and have gold fever and are convinced if they dig long enough they'll find gold on my land.

The other obsession they have with my land is a homeless man they call "Etiole". They sometimes claim he is a demon, they other times claim he is an alien, for a few years they called him a cryptid, they often say he's the Mememegwasi spirit of the Saco River Curse, a few of them say he's a watcher/fallen angel, some say he's a ghost of an Indian chief, some say he's the ghost of a French solider, some have called him a Faerie/Leprechaun/FarDarrig ... and a whole slew of other claims. Regardless of what they call him, they all adimintly refuse to believe that he is just an ordinary human, an elderly homeless man who keeps to himself and desperately wants them to leave him alone. That's all he is. He's just a homeless man who lives in the woods and wants them to leave him alone.

The Atwaters are obsessed with Etiole on severe levels and have gone to alarming levels of monstrous harassment of him through the past 50 years. Part of their obsession with him, is caused by their previously mentioned gold fever. You see, Etiole travels all over Maine, I never know where he is at any given time, but when he's in the local area, I let him camp out on my land. I've let him stay with me like this for over 40 years. In the 1980s, one of the times they arrived to dig up my land, Etiole was sleeping in my 1964 Dodge 330, and according to them, he jumped out of the car and "threw blue lighten bolts" at them causing a tornado to destroy their construction equipment. They claimed he turned into a black serpent with red eyes and 6 blue wings that was hundreds of feet long, surrounded them and killed several of them by summoning lightning bolts. . . . uhm . . . yeah. I wasn't home so I didn't see this event, of Etiole supposedly attacking them. But it's pretty clear they had some sort of massive LSD hallucination, given many of them heavily used LSD back in the 1970s and 1980s when this event happened. According to Etiole, he just jumped out of the car and ran into the swamp to hide, he didn't see any of the stuff they described.

After that they got it into their heads that I had summoned a demon (and that Etiole was said demon) to protect my secret cache of pirate gold, and their battle cry of "kill the demon" is what caused them to blow up my house with a bomb October 18, 2006, drive over my house with a backhoe August 8, 2013, beat me up with golf clubs and murder my baby November 14, 2013, cut my 1964 Dodge 330 in half May 10, 2010. All those things you have all those police reports about.

They are convinced Etiole is in my yard to keep them from my gold. The only problem is, there is no gold on my land. Etiole is not a demon, and their extreme levels of harassment are utterly insane! 

But then, when they get caught on my camera, because I'm a daily vlogger, so the camera is running all the time, them they accuse me of harassing them, because their faces showed up on my livestream. Uhm... I'm on y own land, in my own bedroom, usually a few hours into my daily livestream when they get caught in the background trespassing. That's NOT me harassing them. That's them trespassing and vandalizing, and breaking and entering while not realizing I was home and them getting caught in the act of vandalizing and trespassing.

Then they run to FaceBook and make all kinds of wild claims about me stalking them. I'm crippled. I can't even get out of bed. Every time I have them on camera, it's because they were trespassing and breaking and entering. I'm in my bedroom livestream a game on my computer and they'll be smashing out windows and get mad that it happened to be the window in line with my livestream webcam on my computer. That's NOT be stalking them. That's me laying in bed playing Witcher 3 and them breaking in.

I'm too damned sick and crippled to even attempt to do half the crazy shit my mother and my father are accusing me of. And what's worse, my father is right here in the same apartment with me. He sees me every day, he knows how bad off my health is. 

Look how much I'm bleeding all over the house every day. Massive nose bleeds that last for hours to a time, not bleeding from my nose. Just coming out of my nose. I'm so dizzy I can't sit up for weeks to a time. I faint and blackout when I try to get up to go to the bathroom. The pain in my hip and pelvis and knee and spine is so bad I can't even move my fingers to type my novels. 

And look at what they do. Do they really think I'm physically capable of doing the things they accuse me of? They are so damned self centred and paranoid. It's all I can do just to sit up and eat something, how the hell do they think I can do the stuff they accuse me of? My day is spent focusing on trying to get my leg to move so I can make a meal, I don't even have time to think about them. 

It looks more and like my mother and my father are doing this stuff on purpose to try to kill me. My father knows how bad off my heart and lungs are and how difficult it is for me to breath after just a couple of steps. His mother left that land to me in her will in 1983. He stole it, had it put into his name illegally. He's been pissed ever since her death, because she gave everything to me not him. That's been a big problem for him for the last 40 years. He raves about it alongside his ravings about going to Utah taking him off the fire department. He hates my mother because of Utah, blames her every day for losing his fire department pension. He raves about it all night long every single night. He blames me for his mother disinheriting him. He raves about that all the time too. I was only grandchild That's why she left everything to me. Including the land that he stole and put in his name. That land is rightfully mine, his mother gave it to me, and he can't stand it. He's needling my mother about the land just to spite his mother.

He's only trying to get the land away from me because he is mad that the town didn't take it. His mother wanted it to stay in the family. It had been in her family since 1530. Her family was the original settlement family of Old Orchard and my land is that spot that the first house in Old Orchard was built.  My father stopped paying taxes to spite his mother and lose the land. He said so many times. He was angry when I bought the land back from the town. He still is. He wants it out of the family because his mother wanted it in the family. That's why he's trying to turn my mother against me over the land. Because he gates his own mother that much.

Keep in mind the 4 door white truck showed up at my workplace daily. Even though I never knew ahead of time what store I would be working at. I was a retail merchandiser and stocked shelves at dozens of stores all over the state. Walmart's every where, CVS, khols, sometimes local, sometimes as far as Freeport and once in Vermont and once in Massachusetts.  I got the notice of which store to be at 15 minutes before I left. So the only person who ever knew where I was going was my father. 

And yet the 4 door white truck would also arrive ahead of me and be waiting. They didn't follow me, they got their first.

And the police caught the truck and the driver in 2017. Kathy BR owned the truck. Her son was the driver.

The smith's are my parents friends. My mother's visiting and home teachers for years.

Kathy was the district emergency dispatch for all the towns in the area, not just old Orchard. That's why none of the 911 calls went through during the attacks by the 4 door white truck. He only attacked while she was on duty. She never forwarded any of the calls so officers never were told to come help me.

That includes the November 14, 2013 golf club attack in South Portland. But the college security officer made a report even though the police never arrived. That big black officer who was head of security was on duty and him and 2 student officers from the police academy made the report.

And FBI found the data from the calls, that never got forwarded to police, that's why Kathy BR lost her job. Because she's the one who tampered with the 911 call files.

Tim and Kathy BR both, not together, individually, arriving separately, both arrived at my tent multiple times throughout the entire year of 2013, saying they were coming to speak to me on behalf of someone who wanted to remain anonymous. So I never knew who sent them. Each time they arrived all they would say was that I had to tear down "the little yellow house" as they called the shop. 

August 8, 2013 the backhoe drove over the shop while I was at work on the food truck down by the pier.

I never saw Tim or Kathy again after that. Not once. And these were people who stopped by to visit my parents daily for over 40 years. Since August 8, 2013 and the backhoe attack on my house, Kathy and Tim have gone to alarming extreme levels to avoid running into me. They just down the street, on one of the private drives, so it's difficult to avoid running into me, and we used to see them a few times a week at local grocery stores. They both, if they see me in a store, literally throw whatever they are carrying across the store and run out of the store like they have a pack of rabid wolves on their heels. It's pretty fascinating thing to see.

My cousin and next door neighbour Tim Murphy was murdered that same week, a few days before the backhoe. His body was left at the cascade Ross road crossroad. 14 days later his head was left at the Portland Ave Ross road crossroad road. His mother put up the big white cross a month later. 

Note that there were THREE 4-door white trucks, a smaller one, a larger one, and a mega-sized giant one -like a Dodge Power Wagon type only it was not a Dodge Power Wagon it was one of the look alike brands, possibly a Nissan. The owner and driver of the big-big-super sized one is still unidentified. The other 2 were both caught in 2017, Kathy BR's truck being the larger of the 2. The 3 trucks often showed up together and drive circles around me, on Rout 1/Portland Rd, while I was driving. They would slam my car from back and sides and push me off the road. Several times they did damage to the frame of my car with had to be repaired multiple times. They've done several tens of thousands in damages to my Volvo over the years. You already have a lot of the smashed up car photos on file, at both Biddeford and Old Orchard police departments, you each have more then a dozen reports for attacks on my car -though the FBI has said someone attempted to destroy several of the records with my name, at the Old Orchard police department. FBI said they arrested the officers who did that. I don't know which files were damaged or how. 

For several years/decades now, I have had multiple people trying to buy my land. The same people over and over again. Only buying my land is not what they are asking for. Rather, they claim my land is cursed and I have to sell it to break the curse. Crazy, I know, but that's what they say. The crazier part is they say that after I sell my land I have to hand the money over to them so they can use it as a down payment on a house they want to buy in Kennebunk. The people in question are my parents and they've been doing this for well over 20 years now. I've always said "no, I'm not selling my land" and left it at that.

My mother (she changes her last name often, I'm not sure which she currently uses) and my father my father both have become extreme hostile and violent the past 2 weeks, and I'm not sure what set them off, but they are hyper infuriated on my refusal to sell my land and give them the money for a down payment of a house in Kennebunk. 

I did not suspect them, all these years, because always been other people showing up and say they were contacting me on behalf of someone who wanted to remain anonymous, but now they are directly doing it themselves.

Starting in June 2001, lots of harassment started and at first, I did not suspect them, or think there was a connection. But now they are outright bragging to my face, that they are the ones behind the vandalism. Like I said, check the police records for 144, 146, 148 Portland Ave from June 2001 til current date. There have been dozens of attacks, including drive by shootings, the bombing of my house, the backhoe driving over my next house, me being beat up with golf clubs which is why I am crippled now for the rest of my life and how my baby died.

The FBI is involved. If you need more information beyond what I've written here,  FBI Agent Andy Drewer can be reached at 207-774-9322 he is at the Portland Office on Middle Street, he is in charge of the investigation, of several events, namely the 2013 Boston Marathon bombing, which my uncle Paul Martel went to prison for building the bomb and selling it to ISIS. The 2006 bombing of the house at 144 Portland Ave Old Orchard Beach, Maine. My baby was murdered November 14, 2013, a backhoe drove over my house at 146 Portland August 8, 2013 that's why I'm at the Biddeford apartment right now, because we can't get Kathy BR at the town hall to get a building permit, even though she's not the one in charge of that, she takes over our application and won't let it be approved, because she claims I shouldn't be allowed to live in Old Orchard, due to my having left the Mormon church to become a Voodoo Priestess, she says that makes me a witch and I'm not allowed to apply for a house building permit on those grounds, so, it's been 9 years and I'm still without a house on my land in Old Orchard and still stuck in a Biddeford apartment.

It is a long list of a lot of things happening. I'll try to organize it all in order:

At it's start, the whole thing goes back to a homeless man who wishes to remain anonymous, so I'm not using his real name here, nor have I ever used his real name anywhere online or offline or with any conversation with any one.

He, didn't do anything wrong. Quite the contrary, all he's ever done is live in the Ross Forest and surrounding swamps and marshes along the Saco River in Pine Point, OOB, Saco, Biddeford, and probably other areas, he moves around a lot rotating where he sets up camp, something he's done since 1953. I know quite a few people have seen him and talked to him, I don't know if any police officers have ever encountered him or not. Because he is elderly and in frail health, I often let him stay on my land. He's the ONLY person who has permission to be there. Herein lays the problem: he's deformed from acid burn scars covering most of his body. Churches around the area have spent decades accusing him of being a cryptid, alien, demon, watcher, fallen angel, you name it, someone has called him some weird conspiracy. According to him, himself, he was a Jewish WW2 concentration camp survivor, who arrived in OOB with a bunch of other refugees in 1953. Because he's so deformed by his scars, he was bullied by the locals who refused to believe him a human, and that's why he fled into the forest and never set foot in society again. The problem is, the people harassing me have made up this wild conspiracy that he's a demon and I'm protecting him, and they claim they need to get me off my land in order to get to him.

This all started in 1978.

My parents (my father and my mother), uncles (12), aunts (12+), and cousins (64 at the 1970s/1980s time - more then 400 today), teased and bullied me throughout my childhood about him, but they teased and bullied everyone about everything, so I didn't think that much of their bullying back in the 1970s and 1980s when it first started happening. It was just them being the toxic bullies that they are to everyone.

It wasn't until the 1990s and 2000s that it started to become a problem. And 207 is when I first realized how big of a problem it really was.

In 1996 and 1997 Aunt aunt B sent out lots of emails to the family claiming the emails had been written by me. I did not have email, internet, or even a computer yet. She got Dickie (Richard Merlin Atwater) and David (Atwater) and Joey (Atwater -the one who lives in Australia and is wanted by the FBI for kidnapping and selling babies back in the 1980s- FBI can't arrest him until he leaves Australia -I'm not sure why- so he became a citizen. I don't know the details of what he's wanted for.) in raving warpath over it. All three of them showed up in OOB -even Joey from Australia-though I didn't know he was wanted by the FBI back than. But they arrived here in OOB to yell at me in person, because aunt B made the claim that the emails were from me, so they were all mad at me for having written them, but I never did know the contents of the emails because I didn't write them.

I did not see the emails. I didn't have access to a computer back then ad I didn't have internet until 2007 a full 11 years later. Dickie had several of them printed out and waving them around, but I never got a chance to read what they said. One of the emails was 64 pages long, and according to Dickie was all about aliens. I know nothing about aliens, so most of what he said was just gibberish nonsense to me. This was in 1996, shortly before Heaven's Gate killed 39 people in California and at the time, all 3 of those uncles, plus a few other uncles were members of Heaven's Gate, and one uncle -Mervin Bruce Atwater-made the claim to be "the leader of the Maine division of Heaven's Gate"- I don't know if he actually was a Heaven's Gate leader or not, but he maintained that he was right up until 2019, and in April 2019 he was making the claim to be following Comet Wormwood because HaleBop was the wrong one. Like I said, they were coming up with some pretty wild alien and UFO claims and I'm not sure how much of what they claimed was true.

Well, this was the first time I heard the word "Etiole" which was the nickname they had given to the homeless man who sometimes camped out on my yard. Etiole is not his name, it's always been just the word the Atwaters call him (they say it means man from the stars or alien and that it's a French word. I don't know French, aunt B is the one who knows French, so I never would have given him a French name.) Somewhere in the emails, aunt B had called the homeless man "Etiole" and "amphibious alien" and made the claim that he was an "alien grey" who had abducted me to some mother-ship.  

I have never been abducted by aliens and never made such a claim. I never heard such foolishness. But, that this point, I wasn't fully aware of what they were talking about, so I didn't yet realize they were saying that I was making the claim to have been abducted by aliens.

That's the summer they all showed up talking about Etiole and amphibious aliens and alien abduction. aunt B was the one who started all of that stuff about Etiole, who I never called Etiole. But that was how it got started...all this stuff that is happening now with the vandalism and threats going on this week March 2022.

Bruce and Dickie went to a bunch on MUFON forums from 1996 to 2007 spreading lies about me and Etiole calling him a demon and alien and claiming I was an alien abducted. I found out about what they were doing in 2007 after they'd already been doing it for 11 years. 

I don't think aunt B has ever stopped sending out emails about Etiole while pretended to be me, I think she is still doing it. I think this, because in December 2021, I was at the Biddeford library when an elderly man came over to me, asked if I was EelKat and asked me why I was sending him hundreds of emails about Etiole, and who was Etiole? I told the man I don't use email, I've never emailed anyone, I don't know what he's talking about. He says he gets over 300 emails a day about Etiole from someone claiming to be EelKat. But here's the thing: EelKat is not something I call myself. I'll explain that in a bit.

First, let's go back to 1994. Before aunt B started sending the emails out, while claiming they were written by me. My father (my father) was the one who told the Atwaters about Etiole. My father and Dickie both called him "the white monkey". 

In 1994 and 1996 Bishop Paul Morgan asked me to his office and showed me a bunch of letters, all of them signed "The White Monkey, OST". He said the letters were written to sound like I had written them but he said he'd seen my handwriting before and knew I hadn't written these. The Bishop wanted to know if I recognized the handwriting. Some had been written by my father. Others had been written by Dickie. One was written by my mom's father David Henry Atwater who died several years ago now. This was the Mormon bishop in Cape Elizabeth. This bishop had more then one hundred letters laying on his desk, and he had several boxes more around his desk. He said he received no fewer then 5 letter every day for several months, and was quite concerned for my safety as he felt the letter writers may be "mentally unhinged" and "highly dangerous" based on what he called "several homicidal rants" contained in the letters. He said he was giving the letters to Paul Peterson, at Pine Land Centre Mental Health Institute in New Gloucester, because he felt my father and my uncle Dickie should be committed due to the contents of the letters.

The letters looked physically bizarre. Each one started like a normal letter, straight across sentences, line by line, but upon reaching the end of the page, the words spiralled around the outer edge and into a circle around the page, then upside down bottom to top between the first rows.

Each letter contained codes and cryptographers, and large portions of the letters were unreadable unless you cracked the "secret code" that was included with them.

Both my father and my uncle Dickie frequently wrote in that weird spiral and zigzag of lines fashion. My father's letters were the ones that included the cryptography and hidden codes. Dickies letters were just weird spiralling but no codes to solve.

I did not read any of the letters, but the Bishop was deeply upset by them, and stated that he used to be Catholic before becoming Mormon and said that if he was still Catholic he'd recommend my father had an excorsim down, because as the Bishop put it "the white monkey letters are the closet thing I've ever seen to demon possession".

Later that same year Paul Peterson from Pine Land Centre arrived at church and asked to talk to me. He had with him, some of the White Monkey letters and like the Bishop asked me to id the handwriting.

Stake President Earnshaw (of the same church) later called me in to his office for similar letters he had also received and again the white monkey letters were written by mostly daddy and some Dickie all pretending to be me, trying to make it look like I was pretending to be Etiole. 

In total 16 Bishops and 2 stake presidents had contacted me over the years about white monkey letters, all citing they were receiving them daily. Some said members were receiving them. When I stopped attending the Mormon church, my mother's minister's at the 15 churches she was attending at the time, all started getting the letters. (At the time my mom had a belief that she had to be in church as close to 24 hours a day as possible, so she was attending week day church services at every church that had them, even though she was not a member of most of those churches. She became an atheist last I had heard and attends no churches at all anymore as far as I know.) 

My father was in and out of the hospital a lot during this time period (1991 to 1996-ish), due to the violent fights between him and my mother which included him twice being hospitalized due to blood gushing head injuries from a brick, which also included OOB police arresting my mother for beating him said brick. The psychiatrist from Pine Land Centre felt that my dad suffered serious brain damage from one of the brick beating attacks, and wanted him to press charges against my mother, but he refused. The psychiatrist said he felt that my dad's White Monkey letters was a side effect of the multiple head injuries he was hospitalized for. 

The white monkey letters stopped in 2007 when the psychiatrist at Biddeford hospital diagnosed my father as having schizophrenia and put him on psychiatric medicine. The Biddeford police have this arrest on record. We were living at Water st at the time and my father had tried to kill me and my brother Joshua and also himself. The police arrested him. He was in the psych ward for around a week, and released because of the drastic change in his personality that was caused by the medication. He was only released on the condition that he maintained the meds.

Since 2007 no one has mentioned Etiole or the white monkey, until November 19, 2021, when things (the vandalism and harassment and threats) started escalating, the week Todd Murphy died when people started showing up in Biddeford driveway yelling about Etiole and calling him a suicide demon, claiming my Volvo was demon possessed, and accusing me of driving my car around town to drive people to suicide. I don't know who these people were. The one doing most of the yelling has very unique and very identifiable hair: it's a "high fashion" stick straight bob, like what you see in Italy Runways, super stiff as a board, stick straight, like she uses a few jars of jell to get it so straight. And a weird dark-purple tinted red. Very anime cartoon looking hair. You can't mistake it. She always wears big dark glasses, and usually has a little skinny blond man with her, who appears to be her husband or boyfriend. She frequently is beating him over the head with a baby car seat, while yelling at me and my car, while standing on the front porch of our building. They don't live here, I don't know who they re or where they come from. She did it almost every day of December, and most of the last week of November 2021.

This is the first time anyone has mentioned Etiole in years.

They call him Etiole sometimes, White Monkey other times. 

I should tell you where the term "white monkey" come from.

There was a white monkey, in OOB in the 1970s. It belonged to Helen Pearly of Pine Point and was part of her "White Animal Farm" zoo that she ran, which was a little petting zoo of all albino animals. I think it shut down in the early 1980s. Most older folks of the area remember Helen Pearly and her albino zoo animals - which included an elephant, and other such animals. Well, one day the white monkey escaped and Helen Pearly was a friend of my grandmother's (Helen Ricker Allen) and Helen Pearly showed up at 146 Portland Ave (than 862 because the road was renumbers in 1982) to tell my Grammy Helen the monkey had been seen nearby and to let her know if we saw it. Well, after that me and the other neighbour kids started going out into the swamps looking for the white monkey because Helen Pearly was offering a reward for it being returned. And one day we saw it, and tried to catch it and we followed it into the swamps and we found a homeless man out there. He was sick and starving to death. 

The white monkey belonged to Helen Pearly and has nothing to do with Etiole at all. In 1978 Helen Pearly had a pet white monkey that got lost. Me and Atwater cousin Micheal and my Murphy cousin Timmy (the one whose white cross is on the Ross rd he died in 2013) saw it in the woods out back and tried to catch it. We found Etiole the same day. Etiole is a homeless man who lives behind my land in the woods. Me and Micheal and Timmy took him food. And to this day, we still do, except Michael moved away and Timmy died in 2013 so that left just me taking care of Etiole today. Etiole is very old, probably 80s or 90s today. He's very small, not much bigger than a child, maybe around 5'1"-ish. He's covered with acid burns, scars, and tattoos. He has extreme PTSD and is terrified of the sight of people. He's very skittish, almost mute, speaks mostly with his hands, and run terrified from any people who try to get near him. The only reason he didn't run the day we found him, was because he was very sick, probably pneumonia or something like that. Had we children not found him and taken him food for the next several weeks, he probably would have died that same summer. He must have been in his 50s or 60s back then in 1978.

We told the adults about him, and they went to find him, but, they found some plants instead out there in the swamp, and my mom called the police, and the OOB police called the state police, and the state police called the FBI and the entire rest of the week was lots of police digging up lots of plants. Adam and the Babe, were 2 police officers who were left to stand watch over us children while every one else hauled out the plants. News reporters showed up and the news stations called it "Maine's largest drug raid". I don't know what drug plants look like so I don't know what kind of drugs they were. According the the FBI agents who talked to use kids (we were all 5 to 10 years old at the time) a "bad name named Bryan Cyr put those bad plants in the swamp". The FBI agents said they had been looking for Bryan Cyr and his Cyr Clan from Connecticut for several years and wanted to know had we seen him.  We had not, though we did see him about a year later when the big shoot out happened at 142 Portland Ave in front of the Dome house - the day the dome house blue up because Anne Cyr set fire to the meth lab inside- I saw her poured 3 gas cans on the house then throw several matches. Bryan fled in a robin egg blue micro-mini pick up truck, screaming that the meth lab was gonna blow. The whole house went up like a mushroom cloud. It's the only time I ever saw the Cyr Clan.) 

Adam and the Babe went with us kids to look for the sick homeless man/Etiole as he's now called by locals, but he was gone by then, because it had been 5 or 6 or more hours since the adults found the plants. The 2 police officers looked all over the forest for him, and stopped when they found a human leg bone in the Bachelder Brooke and took that with them and left to join the other officers. (144, 146, and 148 Portland Ave and the swamps and forest behind it is a massive Native American grave - there are at least 500 graves, that back in the 1970s all still had markers, most of the dates are 1400s to 1500, but in the mid 1980s someone stole most all of the slate grave markers, so they are unmarked today. I assume the leg bone was from one of those graves - human bones wash up out of the ground all the time on these sections of land because there are just so many Native American graves all over the place here, on my land and the lands abutting me. It's why the Powder Horn campground can't expand any closer to my land - they hit Native American graves last time they expanded the campground.)

So, because they got sidetracked by all the drug plants and all the police everywhere for the rest of the week, the adults never saw the homeless man or the white monkey as both had been scared off by the huge crowd of drug raid crews.

For some reason because we found him while looking for Helen Pearly white monkey my father and the Atwaters got it in their heads that Etiole was a demon alien shape shifter who turned into a white monkey to lure me and Micheal into the woods. And that's how their stupid ass alien and demon rumours got started.

I should point out, her family, The Atwaters, are the Scottish Traveller Gypsies, aka as The Scottish Mafia by several white Americans, her brothers Bruce and David and several of Davids adult children, grandchildren, and great grand children call themselves Scottish Mafia  and act every bit fitting on that title, which is both why the FBI is investigating and why I have nothing to do with them.

Right after the June attack on her car, a large group of Irish Travellers showed up from the Carilinas and Tennessee and were setting up squatting camps all around the area, The had set up a large camp on BB street behind my Main st/Cutts St apartment in Biddeford, setting up in the big chain link fenced yard on the corner (which is why the owners have since roped the land off.) I didn't think anything of it at first, because the Irish Travellers show up in Southern Maine every year for decades now, so there's nothing unusual about seeing them setting up camps on any space they can find, you see it every year. Usually they camp on the cow farms in Dayton/Buxton/North Saco area, so seeing them in Biddeford was a bit strange.

I point this out because the week they arrived on BB, my mother and her Atwater siblings and their families flipped out big time. They put heavy focus on "the brown house on the corner and the chain link fence yard across the street" and laid out to harassing the landlords of those two locations. They had a list of around 100 addresses in Biddeford, Cape Elizabeth, and many other places included Rhode Island and Connecticut. I saw the list because my mother showed up at my yard waving it around and demanding I help her and the Atwaters stage an attack on the Irish Travellers, whom she claimed was family of the man in the green truck with the 2x4 attack on her car.

A war between the Scottish Travellers/Scottish Mafia/The Atwaters and the Irish Travellers -which include The Cry Clan drug gang from Connecticut - the one the FBI is here looking for-, is the last thing I want to get involved in. Those same two clans are the ones who did the 4-5-8 shoot out back in the 1970s/1980s, when they blew up the dome house at 142 Portland Ave. They were armed to the teeth with truck loads and school bus loads of illegal military guns back in the 4-5-8 shoot out and I don't want to see what kind of weaponry that same group lugs around now 40 years later.

I am a Voodoo Priestess. Voodoo is also known as Folk Catholicism. It is a branch of the Catholic Church. Voodoo is a Christian religion, that focuses on reverence the ancestors. Hollywood Horror movies have slandered our religion to such an extent that the average person thinks Voodoo is dark magic, death spells, curses, and voodoo dolls. Those are all things that exist only in Hollywood and do not exist in real world Voodoo. The problem is made worse, when teens and young adults, not knowing the actual religion, call themselves Voodoo while practising things they see in movies.  While the older generations of Gypsies and Travellers know the difference, younger generation have fallen far from the old traditions, especially the old religion, and sadly, even among Gypsies and Travellers today, many in the age group of 60 years old and younger, only know Voodoo from Horror movies and not from their grandmother's actual practice.

I say this because my mother and her Atwaters wanted me to join then as a "figure head" for their cause. They specifically demanding I summon demons, make voodoo dolls, cast curses, and use magic to kill the list of people living at the addresses on the list they had. In short they attempted to hire me to be a quasi-hit-man for them.

When I explained to them that this is not what Voodoo is about, Voodoo is peaceful, non-violent, we shun weapons and hurtful acts of all types, they lashed out at Etiole -who was not here, it was just me they were yelling at, yelling about him. My mother called Etiole a demon, said he was my familiar, said "I know you work with demons, you can't lie to me" and "you cast death curses on people all the time you lying little bitch, you just won't do it for me because you want to spite your mother, after all I do for you!

I made a Twitch livestream video that same day, telling what was going on and what I feared was about to happen, because I have seen these same two Gypsy clans go to war with each other before.

Well, I have too much to deal with with my health. I'm bedridden 15+ hours a day, so I do nothing but play video games and write novels and edit novels, ALL of which I do on livestream - yes, I livestream for 12 to 15, sometimes 19 hours each and every single day, and I have 92TB of hard drive full of that video footage all the way back to 2015 - I have every minute of every day of my life not only live streamed on Twitch, but I have ALL the video footage files, which mean I have footage of all the attacks, all the yelling at my car, all the demanding I cast death spells, all the trying to hire me as a hit man - all of it. I have over 15k hours of video footage. And because most of the attacks happened during a livestream, there are also hundreds of witness online who saw and heard the attacks and threats already, seeing and hearing them as they were happening.

Going back to the suspecting someone is impersonating me... My mother makes the claim that it is her right to cut the wires off my Biddeford apartment building, because she claims I've put her name, address, and where she goes online. I've never put her address or name or where she goes on the internet. Don't know what she's talking about. I gave her the FBI contact info and told her that if she actually is seeing "me" posting this stuff she claims I'm posting online, then she needs to forward that stuff to the FBI because it's someone impersonating me, and that was one of the things the FBI has suspected was happening so they are actively looking for that kind of stuff. They are trying to get to the bottom of who it is spreading these wild, crazy ass rumours and lies, both doing it in my name and doing it about me.

They've already located a shut down a few dozen impersonation of me, social network accounts, and so far, to date, all of them have belonged to just one person: my mother's brother Mervin Bruce Atwater. Well, it makes sense that HE would know her home address and where she goes, seeing how, for the past decade they were kind of joined at the hip and did everything together. Yeah, of course he knows where she lives and what car she drives and where she goes. 

Also, I never went to school, she did not allow it, There were several legal/court battles between my mom and the OOB school and the state of Maine ad the department of education throughout the 1980s, over the fact that she was actively refusing to allow me to attend school. So I never learned to do math or numbers. I don't know how to count or do money or any stuff like that. And numbers don't register in my head for some reason. People will tell me a phone number or home address and 5 seconds later my mind is blank on the numbers. I can't remember them. That's why when something like an attack happens I write down the tie and date immediately and keep it on a chart - I have a list, day by day, all times and dates of every attack since June 2001. I wouldn't be able to remember what happened when if I didn't keep a list like that.

Well, my mother knows all of this, so she knows even if she had told me her address, which she didn't, I wouldn't have remembered it long enough to even write it down.

In June 2021, I found out she moved, because I was walking my dog -we walk 3 to 4 miles a day, all over Biddeford, Old Orchard, and Scarborough, because I am trying to rebuild my leg muscles after having been bedridden since 2013, with only minimal movement- Doctors said I would never walk again and I aim to prove them wrong and well I have, because I am at least walking enough to walk my dog each day, but it is very difficult, and every step I take feels like a sword stabbing up my right leg and into my spine, because of the nerve damage. It is why I walk so slow and limp so bad, because it hurts terrible to step down.

Well, one day I was walking my dog and all of a sudden, there's my mother, telling me that I'm standing in front of her house and I was surprised, because last I knew she lived several miles away. I had no clue she lived 2 streets over from me and that she had done so for 3 years!

I don't know how she expects me to even know where she goes considering I've had no contact with her in almost a decade now, not since the stunt she pulled April 10, 2015 when she broke into my motorhome, filled it with feces, and then locked her 13 cats in it to frame me for animal abuse. She did not expect the Old Orchard Beach police to arrive and confiscate her cats and then not give them back to her and she has been in a social media battle with several animal shelters, veterinarians, animal control officers, and police officers ever since. Most of her harassment of these people has been targeted at former OOB town hall worker DF  and OOB police officer WW , both of whom she has been harassing on FaceBook for the past 7 years. You can ask DF  and WW  and their family and friends on FaceBook, how bad it has gotten. In recent months she added a new person to her FaceBook harassment, I don't know their name, just that it's the ex-wife and 15 year old son of someone named Todd Murphy who recently died from being hit by a train in front of my Biddeford apartment on Nov 19, 2021. Sometimes she says his death was a suicide, other times she says he was murdered and thrown in front of the train. I don't know which it is, I didn't know him, and only have her word for any of it.

In her mind, the way the whole thing was supposed to happen was: you police were supposed to confiscate my motorhome and she would take her cats and go home. 

What actually happened was: you police confiscated her cats, and I kept my motorhome.

She has spent the last 7 years harassing every pet shelter and rescue in New England, trying to find the cats.

In answer to questions about the cats from April 2015—those were cats belonging to Wayne Whitten of Biddeford, Maine. I was never able to talk about it because of the court case going on between Wayne's family and the Atwaters.

To make matters even worse, the cats were not hers, either. Rather, they belonged to Wayne Whitten and his daughter. My mother had stolen the cats from Wayne, in an act of retaliation, after Wayne refused to hand over to her, his father, William's land.

If you do not know, there are several polygamists in my family, all on the Atwater side. My mother is one of them. Wayne Whitten is one of her many Husbands, and therefore Wayne Whitten is also my stepfather.

In May 2010, my mother took a chainsaw to my 1964 Dodge 330. But it was not the ONLY car she attacked that week. Two days earlier, she took a chainsaw to Wayne's black 1970s vintage Dodge. AFTER, she locked her Old English sheepdog in the trunk and left it there for 6 months, and then tried to say that Wayne killed her dog, when in fact, she had.

Many people in Biddeford, Maine knew Wayne Whitten and his father William Whitten, and both men were known for the wild tales of Wayne's 5th wife, Jeannie, who daily beat him, gathered her older brothers to beat him, and hospitalized him several times, multiple times nearly killing him. That wife is also my mother.

Unfortunately for Wayne Whitten, no one would believe him about how violent and psychotically deranged his wife was and in the space of only a few weeks, his father, then his cats, and then Wayne himself all died. Because of the violent nature of Wayne's death, details were withheld from the public.

Three cats—the white cat Old Lady, and the 2 tabby's Trouble and Sassy, were already dead before the police arrived, and all three were diagnosed as having been force-fed rat poison. This is why, even though my mother put 13 cats in my motorhome, the police only took 10 cats.

Wayne's father, William, owned the cape house next door to Ben's Flooring in Biddeford, behind Walmart. In his 90s, with his health failing, my mother arrived demanding William sell his house and give her the money for a down payment on a mansion in Kennebunk. The exact same demands she is now making at me, these 7 years later. She did this to William Whitten in 2015, and Wayne's daughter to this day maintains that my mother's threats, demands, and harassment were the major contributing factors of William's death.

My mother took the Whitten cats, intending to hold them hostage, until William sold his house and gave her the money. This was why she hid the cats in my motorhome. This is also why when the police showed up asking about the cats, I had no clue what they were talking about and let them search the motorhome telling them there were no cats in it. My mother broke into my motorhome and hid the cats in there, apparently 3 days earlier, and I was unaware she had done this so was unaware the cats were there.

This is also why, when police officer Will Watson asked how many cats there were and what their names were, why I did not know how many cats there were and only knew the names of a couple of the cats that I had heard Wayne talk about.

William Whitten died while the cat fiasco was going on.

Wayne, realizing what my mother had done to his cats, tried to get them back, but he died a few weeks later.

Wayne, his father, and his cats all died a few weeks apart from each other.

My mother went around triumphantly bragging that she had gotten Wayne's father's land, via being Wayne's wife, and set about to the process of buying the house in Kennebunk. And got slapped with a reality check when the two wills got read and both William and Wayne had left everything they had to Wayne's daughter.

In raging inferno, my mom lashed out at Wayne's daughter, and a lawsuit happened, with Wayne's daughter charging my mother with kidnapping the cats, and using rat poison to slowly poison Wayne. A massive Facebook war happened between the Whittens and the Atwaters as my mother got her Atwater thugs involved, and the Whitten's fled in terror once they realized the rumours that my mother was part of the Scottish Mafia, was in fact, very, very, very true.

To this day, the remains of Wayne Whitten's surviving family live in mortal terror, daily vandalism, and barbaric levels of harassment at the hands of my mother, and her brothers Bruce and David and David's sons and grandsons.

More details of what happened can be found here: Amphibious Aliens: https://www.eelkat.com/AmphibiousAliens.html

And no, for the people who are confused, Amphibious Aliens has nothing to do with aliens. It is about a homeless man whom my mother and her brother Bruce, over hyper focused on, and together my mother and Bruce created an elaborate alien abduction and demon possession hoax, so they could try to scam several dozen locals out of their houses.

This cat stealing, house stealing scam is something they have been doing to people all over Southern Maine since BEFORE I was even born. The earliest known attempt at this house stealing scam dates back to their father David Henry Atwater and a house he stole in the 1930s in Rumford Maine. At the time, my grandfather used the hoax of an angel from heaven coming down and telling him to take the Rumford farm. And at the time, my grandfather was a transport driver for Honey Fizt's ACTUAL Boston Mafia, which is WHY, the Atwaters make the claim to be the Scottish Mafia. Their claim is that because they are Scottish, and their father worked for Honey Fitz that they are Mafia. But the Atwaters are neither Scottish nor Mafia, both claims are outright lies that are nothing more than part of the scam they run.

As can be seen with BOTH what she has spent the past 5 decades doing to Etiole and what she is currently doing to Todd Murphy's family on and off FaceBook, you can see how much my mother hyper focuses on homeless people and abusing their friends and relatives and using the homeless person's homelessness as excuses for the scams she runs.

That she spent decades running a land stealing scam in Etiole's name, and now is running another land stealing scam in Todd Murphey's name is utterly deplorable.

And you people who wonder WHY I've not had contact with my mother in 30 years, WHY I shun her. WHY I hate her and her Atwater thugs so much... you are right now witnessing it live as they do it all over again, this time taking advantage of the pain and suffering of Todd Murphy's family to try to steal land from people in the name of a homeless man who was killed by a train.

I am thoroughly and utterly disgusted with my mother's vile abuse of the Murphy family and what she is doing in the name of a dead man.

I've said it thousands of times before and I'll say it again: The Atwaters are scum.

The Atwaters devote their lives to abusing homeless people and the families of those homeless people, just so they can run their filthy scams, and I’m fucking sick of the Atwaters and their filth.


She has had several retaliation attacks happen to her, done by family and friends of the people she's harassing on FaceBook. the retaliation attacks included a Biddeford Public Works road grader being driven into her yard and over her car in 2017. Two additional attacks on her next car, the following year. And in June 2021 a man driving a green pick up truck drove into her yard and beat her car with a 2by4. (Note, I did not witness any of these attacks on her cars and only have her word on what happened.)

All of these people she is fighting with on FaceBook, I don't know, they are people she knows and they are not on my FaceBook and I blocked her and all the Atwaters from my FaceBook back in May 2015, when her and her nieces and nephews and siblings were posting death threats on my FB profile. One cousin cousin name, posted pictures of herself carrying a machine gun (not automatic rifle - but a machine gun - the big type you put on a tripod and have a belt full of hundreds of bullets slung over your shoulder- similar to a gatland gun but not as big, though she had pictures of her gatland gun too that she was also posting on my FB) She'd write under the pictures "This is the gun I'm going to shoot you with"... her husband was one of the guys arrested after the Jan 6 attack, by the way - the guy in Florida with the Nancy something's ( forget her last name, I think it began with a P? I don't know American politics, I find it all confusing so I'm not sure who the Nancy woman was). He stole her pulpit and  he was posting pictures of him stealing on FB. Her mom is aunt L, and she and he were among the 23 cousins that the FBI has been trying to find because they supplied a lot of the guns for the Jan 6th attack, according to posts they made on FB. I don't know, I never saw any such posts because I have them all blocked n FB since 2015. Her brother cousin name was also posting pictures of him carrying guns and writing death threats underneath on my FB wall. His messages said: "I'm an ordained Aaronic Priest and god has given me permission to blow your brains out with this gun". cousin name and cousin name are 2 of David and aunt L's 15 adult kids -all are 40 to 60+ years old. David is my mom's oldest brother, he's in his 80s. He is very violent, there has never been an occasion of him arriving on my land in Old Orchard, that did not involve his trying to kill me, usually by strangling me. He is the most violent of all the uncles. Several times while he's been here he beat up his adult kids by hitting them in the face with weights off of dumbells. 

Most of the Atwater men are retired Marines, and all of them are over 6'2" the tallest, is 7'3". These guys are HUGE and are all weightlifters. You don't want to cross one of the Atwater uncles, they are former Marines trained in weaponless combat. David runs a compound in Palmyra.. . and you might have just seen his crew in the news - they were doing a squatter's rights takeover of that big mansion next door to Stephen King in Bangor and somehow the place caught fire. The news reports didn't mention Stephen King and went out of their way to get camera angles that kept King's house out of the news, but I'm as familiar with Bangor streets as I am Old Orchard and Biddeford streets, so I recognized which house it was on the news, that got attacked by the squatters doing a take over war. 

My uncle and his kids are trying to confiscate the land all around Stephen King - they say they have the right to because no one was ever paid any money for being in The Thinner movie. That happened about 2 weeks ago, the news did not list the squatters name, but like I said, it's my uncle and his crew, they been focusing on the 20 or so houses around King's big red Victorian, for over a decade now. They tried to get me to help them do it, that's how I found out. They made the claim that because I'm an author I should be able to reason with Stephen King and convince him to hand over his red Victorian house in exchange for his never paying them for being in The Thinner. I told them to get lost and burn in hell. Just because I'm an author and King's film crew filmed a part of Thinner on my land in Old Orchard doesn't mean I know King himself, I never even met him, and them being obsessed with stealing land from people is just out of control. 

The whole Atwater clan does this. They don't see anything wrong with moving in, setting up camp, and driving the rightful land owners off their land at gunpoint.

They act like it's a family tradition to steal land from people, via squatting, harassment, corrosion, death threats, and outright just forging deeds and switching the files, like they did with my land.

And that's the issue we have going on right now. My mother has gone on a psych crazed warpath vendetta of taking my land or else, and or else so far has included her twice now having my father shove things up the tailpipe of my car, both times doing lots of damage t the car when I started the engine and everything inside blew up because of the fuel line blocked. And twice now - each time the same day as attacking my Volvo cutting the wires off the Biddeford apartment as well, in the same driveway where the car was parked.

Both times they admitted to doing it and both times used the justification that I deserved it because I was refusing to sell my land and give my mother the money to buy a house in Kennebunk. She says she has to move to Kennebunk to "get away from the niggars invading Maine, Kennebunk is all white they don't allow no niggars". She's very crude and vulgar and has an extreme hatred for black people and hangs around online with some group that calls itself "the workers of iniquity" which claims to be "a branch of the Ku Klux Klan because the original Ku Klux Klan is not strict enough".

Throughout 2016 people wearing KKK-like white robes and hood showed up in Old Orchard to make threats about my land. Back then I was unaware that my mother was friends with such a group. The robes are NOT KKK robes, the KKK robes are very distinctive, covered with fancy bead work and embroidery, and are not white, but are usually green or red or blue or yellow. It's a Hollywood myth that the KKK wears white, and that's how you can tell REAL KKK from fake wannabe's pretending to be KKK. Real KKK is not wearing white sheets and white pillowcases. The real KKK is a church that is organized similar to Catholic church and all their robes mean specific ranks, also they don't wear hood, they wear mitre hats like the pope does, and have a veil mask over their eyes. So its pretty easy to identify real KKK from fakers in white sheets, and the people showing up in my yard were not real KKK, they were fakers literally wrapped in white bed sheets with pillow cases over their heads. 

Well, various white-power groups show up in the area, that's nothing unusual. Neo-Nazi, Sovereign Citizens, ect. They've always been around Maine, so much so that there are KKK and white power history museums in Maine -one is in Saco. So, I didn't think much of the white hood idiots in my yard. We are Gypsies, white hooded idiots are a part of our non-white life.

Well, here's the thing: we are not white. My mother's mother was not a Gypsy. Eva Viola Little John Dyer Atwater was half Kickapoo Native American and half black. He mother was 100% Native America. Her father 100% black. My mom is 1/4 black, 1/4 Native American, and 1/2 Gypsy of Roumania/Arabian/Middle Eastern descent. There is not one drop of white blood in her. Which is why I was surprised to hear her say: "I gotta move to Kennebunk to get away from the niggars invading Maine, Kennebunk is all white they don't allow no niggars". Yes, Kennebunk is all white, and look at the news, the black school teach who lives in Old Orchard Beach and worked at Kennebunk schools is daily bombarded with swastika painted on her car while she's teaching class. I can't drive my Volvo down main street Kennebunk with out getting pelted with rocks and crowds running off the sidewalks screaming "death to Gypsy scum!" It's dangerous t drive through Kennebunk and not be white -they pull us coloured folks out of cars if we get stopped at a red light. Kennebunk is legendary for being the most white power town in the state of Maine.

One has only to look up the international news reports of the 10 year old school children dragging their black teacher into the streets and almost beating her to death -in 2020. That happened barely a year ago. Kennebunk is the most hostile anti-black town in America and they are proud of it, brag about it, and since the BLM stuff of 2020, Kennebunk has gotten ten times worse. And, she's been seeing all that in the news and wants to live there, and I'm not sure why, because like I said,  my mom is 1/4 black, 1/4 Native American, and 1/2 Gypsy of Roumania/Arabian/Middle Eastern descent and if she tries to buy a house there, and they find out she has black blood, they'll kill her. But she's all hyped up on a white power kick and wants to join Kennebunk's anti-black movement, and... I... I just don't understand it and I'm sure if that's actual why she wants to go thee or not.

There was a court case about the cats (3 different ones because the town hall dropped the case after evidence proved the cats were not mine and my mother had snuck them in my motorhome a few days earlier to try to frame me and then some MB guy crawled out of the woodwork to reopen the case a month later), which, for some reason was in my name, not her name, because the motorhome was mine, even though the cats were hers. Weirdly, half way through the court case the town hall dropped the case and some guy named MB Bureau took over it instead. Thing is, I don't know who this MB guy is. He's not anyone I have ever even met before and he was not at the court so I didn't meet him there either. He came in with lots of wild accusations about me harassing him, even though I had no clue who he was and had never heard of him before. MB's lawyer took photo copies of a conversation on Twitter between me and JB (the guy the FBI arrested for embezzling $30k out of the OOB town hall bank account - $3million in OOB tax money went missing, the rest was never found as far as I know. The Twitter conversation was this JB sending me death threats because he had just been released from prison, and he was claiming I had put him there, even though I didn't know him or that he'd been in prison or that he had stolen money from OOB town hall. According to FBI, JB was a church friend of my mother's and he and town manager Jim Thomas, had been Bishopric counsellors to Mormon Church Bishop DK and the 3 of them and several others from the Saco LDS church had taken over the OOB town hall in around 2010 and embezzled $3million in town taxes. Apparently my Uncle Mervin Bruce Atwater, Richard Merlin Atwater, and aunt B had been involved, been involved and they had used fake social media accounts in my name to contact JB so he thought I knew him, that's why he contacted me on my real account after getting out of prison. I don't know the details I only know the small bit of info the FBI told me to let me know why this JB guy was contacting me.) For some reason, this MB guy, said the Twitter conversation with this Joel guy was about him. 

And apparently according to the FBI, this MB guy owns the old abandoned logging road across the street from me, which is numbered as 139 Portland Ave. I don't know, that road has been abandoned at least since the 1970s, I had no idea any one lived down there, but FBI says this MB guy does. I've been at 146 since 1975, and I've never see any one live there. FBI says there is another driveway on a different side that they probably use. Any ways, for some odd reason this MB guy took over the court case with the cats, only he suddenly said it was about me being transgender (but I'm not transgender, so I don't know why he said I was) His lawyer came into court saying I was a man pretending to be a woman, and here's where it got really weird, the lawyer copied what he SAID was an "About Me" page off of my website (eelkat.com) only what he copied was the about page for the main character of the novel series I write (I'm the author of 138 published novels). The series is about a male Elf who is possessed by a female parasitic alien jellyfish. So it's a female jellyfish wearing the body of a dead male Elf like a coat and passing herself off as him.

Well, this lawyer (Gene Libby) for this MB guy is waving THAT fictional character profile around in court, saying it was my personal about me page, and making the claim that I was a male to female transvestite who believed I was an Elf... and here's the kicker... his whole spiel was trying to convince the judge that I was insane so this MB guy could confiscate my land at 146 Portland Ave! It was the most bizarre thing, and the judge thought so too, because the judge tossed the whole thing out of court because the charges this MB guy had against me were so oddball off the wall nut job ridiculous. But the thing was, again, it was someone making wild claims that I had to hand them over my land, which is what keeps happening with every one of these weird attacks. And always, like both these 2 guys: JB and MB Bureau they are creepy ass strangers who crawl out of the woodwork, people I've never heard of before, making claims to being my friend (JB made the claim he was my best friend and said we talked all the time on FaceBook, but he wasn't on my FB and I'd never heard of him before. While MB Bureau in his court papers made the claim to be one of my uncles -he is not-and)

aunt B and aunt L of Bangor used to be putting stuff online about me and my brothers and JB would get it from aunt B and aunt L and forward it every where. This was in 2010 era, but I did not see the posts, because none of them is a FaceBook friend of me. The FBI however said they saw a lot of the posts, these people made, including several death threats. Seems likely something like that is happening again given the way people keep showing up here at the Biddeford apartment when no one even knew I was here.

I met aunt L about 3 times during my childhood, it's been 30+ years since I last saw her, and I've never spoken with her online or offline not once in my entire life.

aunt B I meet 10 or 12 times during my childhood, and likewise it's been 30+ years since I last saw her, except for 2 times. One in 2013 she showed up at my Biddeford apartment on Water St, with some medical scam idea she had that she wanted me to help her with. She said she was working at Blue Cross/Blue Shield and had found a way to get people's insurance money because a lot of people didn't file claims; she said she was also an EMT, and she could take the records from one job to cross with the other job, to have people's insurance money forwarded to a POBox she owned. I told her I wanted nothing to do with it and to get lost. I don't know how true any of the stuff she said was. I don't know if she worked at those places or could do the scam she was claiming or not.

aunt B showed up again in 2016, at the Gazebo Park (might be named Mechanic's Park?) on the Saco River by the water treatment plant. I was there walking my dog, and my mother showed up with an uncle Peter (now deceased) who was visiting from Utah. They were having a picnic. aunt B and Bruce showed up to trash everything, steal the food, and then leave. They were yelling and screaming the whole time. They acted drunk, except I didn't think they drank. I don't know. Mormons don't drink, not usually.

So I don't know aunt B and aunt L otherwise. I know nothing about them. Have never had contact with them, have never spoken with them online or offline. So, I'm puzzled as to why they were posting things online about me in 2010, or why they were acting like they knew me, when neither of them has ever been a part of my life or know anything about me.

But, they make claims that I say and do various things that I don't say or do. The list of things they've accused me of is massive and kind of crazy and include the claims that I am a prostitute, and that I am a Mafia gang leader ... like I said, it's just wild and also very slanderous and I'm sick of it.

Back in 2019 when my mother got her car, she had it over a month before I even knew she had gotten a car. I found out she had it when she flipped out saying I was online telling people she bought a car. And it turned out is was aunt B and Brucie online telling everyone she got a car, but I had told them,  even thought I had never talked to either of them since 2013 when FBI told me cut off all contact with them

aunt B and Bruce and aunt L all 3 are constantly telling people I said things, that I never said. 

I told you people been showing up talking about Todd and claiming I said things online about him, but I don't even know who he is or what they are talking about. It almost looks like someone is online impersonating me.

A few weeks ago an old man walked up to me, asked if I was EelKat and then asked me why I kept emailing him, and I said I don't email anyone cause I don't use email. He said some days he gets over 300 emails a day from someone claiming to be EelKat 

Last time my car had this problem was same day my father cut the internet on my mom's orders. Suspicious my car has same problem again, same day internet goes off again. It went off while my mother was here

aunt B showed up at water st day after golf club attack, but I never knew how she found out , I never told anyone online about it . Her and Bruce knew about it some how before any one else.  They wanted me to use my injury to help them run a medical scam and they were pissed when I refused to. They started spreading lies about me online because of that. That was Nov 2013

aunt B and Bruce knew about the cats and DAY BEFORE it happened. aunt B posted on my FaceBook wall "the next head nailed to the door will be yours" the day before any heads were nailed to door

I think it's aunt B online saying stuff about me and my mom, because she did it before and because FBI was here asking about her going down to Washington Jan 6 attack, but I didn't yet know the Jan 6 attack had even happened. They said aunt B aunt L and 23 cousins had been down there and they FBI was trying to find them. 

Old Orchard police and Biddeford police and a detective have all shown up asking about aunt B and aunt L and 23 cousins as well. But again I don't know anything because I not had contact with them. But FBI, 2 police departments and a detective are all saying aunt B and aunt L and 23 cousins are making claims about me, in connection to bombs and ISIS .

That's how I found out Paul Martel was in prison. According to FBI agents, Paul Martel built the bombs for the 2013 Boston marathon and the 2013 bomb at South Maine Community College and put the college bomb in my class to make it look like I made the Boston bomb. That's why the FBI showed up to begin with. They were at the college investigating both bombs that happened the same day

FBI said they believed the whole thing was aunt B and Bruce idea, but Paul martial was the one who actually built the bomb and sold it to ISIS, and put the second bomb in my class at college so Paul Martel was the only one they could arrest. FBI is trying to arrest aunt B because they think she's the one behind it. They said the whole thing seems to have started because Scott went to prison for selling drugs at Scarborough downs and for some reason aunt B thinks I'm the one who turned him in, even though I've not seen or heard from Scott since he was 8 years old

FBI thinks the attack on the cats was aunt B retaliating because Paul Martel got arrested. 

When Dickie died also in 2013, after the bomb in Boston but before the golf club attackers aunt B was with him taking charge of his medicine and his official cause of death was an overdose of his medicine, with a not saying unable to determine if accident or suicide. I found out this 2 days after he died when Jacksonville County state police from Florida showed up here in Maine to interview me about where I was the day Dickie died  because when he died aunt B called 911 and told the police I had killed him. 

The FBI thinks the golf club attack was aunt B retaliating because police didn't arrest me for murdering Dickie like she had demanded they do

FBI is full focused on arresting aunt B and Bruce. There's no evidence Bruce is dead. All evidence points to him being in New Zealand. 

FBI believes Bruce faked death because FBI was moving in to close and he didn't want to take the fall for what aunt B is doing 

In 1996 and 1997 aunt B sent out lots of emails to the family claiming the emails had been written by me. I did not have email, internet, or even a computer yet. She got Dickie and David and Joey in raving warpath over it. That's the summer they all showed up talking about Etiole and amphibious aliens and alien abduction. aunt B was the one who started all of that stuff about Etiole, who I never called Etiole. Etiole is not his name, it's always been the word the Atwaters used to describe him (it means man from the stars or alien it's a French word. I don't know French, aunt B is the one who knows French, so I never would have given him a French name) Bruce and Dickie went to a bunch on MUFON forums from 1996 to 2007 spreading lies about me and Etiole calling him a demon and alien and claiming I was an alien abducted. I found out about it in 2007 after they'd already been doing it for 11 years. I don't think aunt B has ever stopped sending out emails about Etiole while pretended to be me, I think she is still doing it.

My father was the one who told the Atwaters about Etiole. My father and Dickie both called him the white monkey. In 1994 and 1996 Bishop Morgan asked me to his office and showed me a bunch of letters, all of them signed "The White Monkey, OST". He said the letters were written to sound like I had written them but he said he'd seen my handwriting before and knew I hadn't written these. He wanted to know if I recognized the handwriting. Some had been written by daddy. Others had been written by Dickie. President Earnshaw later called me in for similar letters he had received and again the white monkey letters were written by mostly daddy and some Dickie all pretending to be me, trying to make it look like I was pretending to be Etiole. In total 16 Bishops and 2 stake presidents had contacted me over the years about white monkey letters

The white monkey letters stopped in 2007 when the psychiatrist at Biddeford hospital diagnosed daddy as having schizophrenia and put him on psychiatric medicine. Since 2007 no one has mentioned Etiole or white monkey, until the week Todd died when people started showing up in Biddeford driveway yelling about Etiole and calling him a suicide demon

The white monkey belonged to Helen pearly and has nothing to do with Etiole at all. In 1978 Helen pearly had a pet white monkey that got lost. Me and cousin Micheal saw it in the woods out back and tried to catch it. We found Etiole the same day. Etiole is a homeless man who lives behind my land in the woods. Me and Micheal took him food. For some reason because we found him while looking for Helen pearly white monkey my father and the Atwaters got it in their heads that Etiole was a demon alien shape shifter who turned into a white monkey to lure me and Micheal into the woods. And that's how their stupid ass alien and demon rumours got started.

I used to let him sleep in the Dodge at night, that's why people started saying the car was haunted. They said Etiole was a demon and the car was demon possessed. My father and Bruce used to stay up all night debating what kind of demon Etiole must be and kept calling me a demon child and a witch and saying I was demon possessed and they called Etiole my familiar and said I summoned him to cast curses and death spells. Bruce believed all that stuff as actual fact and after Bruce left for the night my dad would joke about how gullible Bruce was and how easy it was to convince him demons lived in my car. From there the rumours ended up on the internet through the Heaven's Gate group, that Bruce was a member of at the time. They were a group of around 200 people who went from one UFO forum to the next spreading rumours about me and Etiole. They did that for 11 years before I found out Bruce and his UFO friends were doing it. 

I found out when people started showing up in Old Orchard with beeping equipment claiming they were here the capture Etiole while calling him an amphibious alien and EBE and calling me "EelKat Etiole's friend" I did not use the username EelKat online and none of my books about EelKat (the black bobcat) had ever been published so there was no reason for internet people to know either the name EelKat or Etiole.  I was using the username xavychup online not EelKat, that's why my email address is xavychup not EelKat. EelKat is something Grammy called me back in the 1970s because she said eels and cats were my spirit animals. I never called myself EelKat online or offline so only the Atwaters had ever heard that word before and yet in 2007, I spent the entire summer with endless people showing up in my yard at my tent and all calling me EelKat and all looking for Etiole. 

Because I was living under the tarp I had no access to internet yet so had no clue what was going on online. I went to the library and searched Etiole and EelKat to see what came up and I found tens of thousands of forum posts and interviews and articles all written by Bruce and Dickie, including interviews with Buddy Hopkins, David Mack, and David Icke. All the stuff they said was how they had this demon possessed niece who had been abducted by aliens and has brought an alien back from the mother ship with her and was now protecting him. Every one of the forum posts. Interviews and articles had my full name, my old Orchard address, my email, and my old Orchard phone number listed. That was why so many people were showing up at the tent. In 2006 to 2009. The whole thing of people calling me a Witch and saying about curses and death spells and aliens and demons was started by daddy saying that stuff to Bruce and then Bruce and Dickie spreading it online for 11 years from 1996 to 2007

I started using the name EelKat online BECAUSE my uncles had spent 11 years calling me that on MUFON forums, and when I found out about it and started contacting all the forum admins, I had to tell every one:

"I'm Wendy Christine Allen. I'm the one you all call EelKat, Etiole's friend, the REAL EelKat, friend of the REAL Etiole,  and I'm here to slap every damned one of you with protection from harassment orders. I'm tired of the slander and lies you people are spreading about me of fucking UFO websites. I'm not an alien abductee, I've never claimed to be, until this morning I didn't even know what an alien abductee was. Etiole is not an alien. Etiole is not a demon. He's a local homeless man who has a skin deformity, so he hides in the forest because people are scared of him because of what he looks like, and they beat him up and bully him. The people telling you he's an alien are my uncles, who the ring leaders behind beating him up and bullying him, and I'm quite upset to find out they've been doing it online for quite some time and I'm only just finding out about it now, because earlier this week, I had 30,000 people in my driveway, trying to catch him while screaming that he was an amphibious alien and EBE. You UFO crazies are insane, and I want you people out of my yard. My uncles are lying to you about me and Etiole and you'll idiots for believing them."

I created an EelKat username EVERYWHERE just so I could post that message to every place my uncles had posted that fucking ass alien abduction shit about me and Etiole. THAT, is why you saw me start to use the EelKat username in 2007, when I was always xavychup everywhere before that.

And that is also why I do NOT have an EelKat email.  I've had the xavychup email since 1994, I still have it. And anyone using an eelkat email to contact you isn't me, because I don't have an eelkat email. It always has been and still is xavychup.

Last I knew aunt B and Bruce and aunt L and Bruce's daughters and David's kids and grandchildren were all still continuing to spread demon and alien lies about me and Etiole and were still putting my real name and address on everything. In 2019 they were putting my old Orchard address my high street address and also my water st address even though I was no longer at water street on thousands of forum posts and Facebook posts. In 2019 they were making several hundred posts daily across all there accounts and I found 27 fake EelKat accounts owned just by Bruce himself alone. They were all things like eeelkat, ee1kat, 33lkat, etc. Slightly spell different to look like it was me, yo someone looking quick and not paying attention.  They are likely still doing it and I assume they are doing the same to my mother as well. 

Also I don't even know what mothers address is. How could I put it anywhere? I didn't even know she moved until last summer and apparently she moved a few years ago. No one ever told me she had moved. 

Just like the saying about me saying she got a car. I didn't know about the white car until she came over in it to see Mickey last may and apparently she had a few cars in between. Last car I knew was the black one. I didn't even know she had a new car, let alone more than one.

No one ever told me those things, not her or any one else so it's utterly stupid for her to think I could put her address or cars online. Only people who knew about her address and cars could put them online.

Don't forget she never even told me when Dickie or Bruce died. Both times I found out from the FBI showing up to investigate accusations that I had murdered them

I'm the bed ridden, crippled by multiple attacks. The November 14, 2013 golf club attack, I was almost healed from, but the June 2016 shopping cart attack re opened the 2013 injury and doctors can't operate this time because of the bone shards severing my spinal column. I'm crippled for the rest of my life and no one in this family ever cared. 

Both attacks the FBI wanted to talk to my parents and they refused to talk to him both times. My baby was murdered in the first attack. I was 8 months pregnant and all any of them would do was gibberish about "rosemary baby" and say there was no baby because it was a demon because it was Etiole's. My parents and the Atwaters hate Etiole that much, that they shun the existence of my baby and act like it was never there. That's how much they hate me. That's how cruel and hate filled they are towards me. They spent the last 50 years calling me demon possessed and them saying that is WHY local people attack me and killed my baby and left me crippled for the rest of my life. 

I am in bed 15 or more hours a day, I can barely sit up, I can barely stand up long enough to cook, I have to wear adult diapers since 2013 because half my organs don't work any more because the nerves from those organs to my spine are cut off. My hands shake so bad that it takes me hours to eat a single meal. I can't go back to college, I can't go back to work. But do they care? No. Not my mother. Not my father. Neither of them give a shit. They are both too damned selfish thinking about their own greed to ever once lift a finger to help me. Daddy treats me like a fucking slave and my mother is so far out of my life shunning me because bishop kenning in Saco ward told her too that she hasn't got a clue how bad things are.

I'm not doing a damned thing to any of them. I mind my own business. I write my novels. I don't contact them. I don't talk to them. I don't talk about them.  Someone is clearly pretending to be me online and is slandering me and getting sick of it. My mother flips out about everything thing under the sun and I never have a clue what she's talking about, because I never did or said any of the things she accuses me of. And my father and the Atwaters do the same thing. Some one is out there pretending to be me to get them worked into a frenzy just to sit back and laugh while watching my mother, my father, and the Atwaters be too damned stupid to think. My mother and my father and the Atwaters are all filled with so much pure hatred for me that it takes nothing to convince them to attack me. And whoever it is posting online pretending to be me, knows that and is taking advantage of it. 

I'm too damned sick and crippled to even attempt to do half the crazy shit my mother and my father are accusing me of. And what's worse, my father is right here in the same apartment with me. He sees me every day, he knows how bad off my health is. 

Look how much I'm bleeding all over the house every day. Massive nose bleeds that last for hours to a time, not bleeding from my nose. Just coming out of my nose. I'm so dizzy I can't sit up for weeks to a time. I faint and blackout when I try to get up to go to the bathroom. The pain in my hip and pelvis and knee and spine is so bad I can't even move my fingers to type my novels. 

And look at what they do. Do they really think I'm physically capable of doing the things they accuse me of? They are so damned self centred and paranoid. It's all I can do just to sit up and eat something, how the hell do they think I can do the stuff they accuse me of? My day is spent focusing on trying to get my leg to move so I can make a meal, I don't even have time to think about them. 

It looks more and like my mother and my father are doing this stuff on purpose to try to kill me. My father knows how bad off my heart and lungs are and how difficult it is for me to breath after just a couple of steps. His mother left that land to me in her will in 1983. He stole it, had it put into his name illegally. He's been pissed ever since her death, because she gave everything to me not him. That's been a big problem for him for the last 40 years. He raves about it alongside his ravings about going to Utah taking him off the fire department. He hates my mother because of Utah, blames her every day for losing his fire department pension. He raves about it all night long every single night. He blames me for his mother disinheriting him. He raves about that all the time too. I was only grandchild That's why she left everything to me. Including the land that he stole and put in his name. That land is rightfully mine, his mother gave it to me, and he can't stand it. He's needling my mother about the land just to spite his mother.

He's only trying to get the land away from me because he is mad that the town didn't take it. His mother wanted it to stay in the family. It had been in her family since 1530. Her family was the original settlement family of old Orchard and my land is that spot that the first house in Old Orchard was built.  My father stopped paying taxes to spite his mother and lose the land. He said so many times. He was angry when I bought the land back from the town. He still is. He wants it out of the family because his mother wanted it in the family. That's why he's trying to turn my mother against me over the land. Because he gates his own mother that much.

Keep in mind the 4 door white truck showed up at my workplace daily. Even though I never knew ahead of time what store I would be working at. I was a retail merchandiser and stocked shelves at dozens of stores all over the state. Walmart's every where, CVS, khols, sometimes local, sometimes as far as Freeport and once in Vermont and once in Massachusetts.  I got the notice of which store to be at 15 minutes before I left. So the only person who ever knew where I was going was my father. 

And yet the 4 door white truck would also arrive ahead of me and be waiting. They didn't follow me, they got their first.

And the police caught the truck and the driver in 2017. Kathy BR owned the truck. Her son was the driver.

The smith's are my parents friends. My mother's visiting and home teachers for years.

Kathy was the district emergency dispatch for all the towns in the area, not just old Orchard. That's why none of the 911 calls went through during the attacks by the 4 door white truck. He only attacked while she was on duty. She never forwarded any of the calls so officers never were told to come help me.

That includes the November 14, 2013 golf club attack in South Portland. But the college security officer made a report even though the police never arrived. That big black officer who was head of security was on duty and him and 2 student officers from the police academy made the report.

And FBI found the data from the calls, that never got forwarded to police, that's why Kathy BR lost her job. Because she's the one who tampered with the 911 call files.

Tim and Kathy BR both, not together, individually, arriving separately, both arrived at my tent multiple times throughout the entire year of 2013, saying they were coming to speak to me on behalf of someone who wanted to remain anonymous. So I never knew who sent them. Each time they arrived all they would say was that I had to tear down "the little yellow house" as they called the shop. 

August 8, 2013 the backhoe drove over the shop while I was at work on the food truck down by the pier.

I never saw Tim or Kathy again after that. Not once. And these were people who stopped by to visit my parents daily for over 40 years. Since August 8, 2013 and the backhoe attack on my house, Kathy and Tim have gone to alarming extreme levels to avoid running into me. They just down the street, on one of the private drives, so it's difficult to avoid running into me, and we used to see them a few times a week at local grocery stores. They both, if they see me in a store, literally throw whatever they are carrying across the store and run out of the store like they have a pack of rabid wolves on their heels. It's pretty fascinating thing to see.

My cousin and next door neighbour Tim Murphy was murdered that same week, a few days before the backhoe. His body was left at the cascade Ross road crossroad. 14 days later his head was left at the Portland Ave Ross road crossroad road. His mother put up the big white cross a month later. 

The 4 door white truck showed up a few days later. 

Tim Murphy had an identical truck. The police and FBI initially thought it was his, but his truck was later found.

Tim Murphy owned Etiole's swamp and was the one buying most of the food and supplies for Etiole. 

Tim Murphy was with me and Micheal the day we tried to catch Helen pearly white monkey and found Etiole. 

The FBI believes that Tim Murphy was killed by someone trying to frame Etiole and believes the murder was a retaliation over Tim Murphy refusing to sell the swamp land behind me. 

At the time the FBI was looking at DF Feeney as a suspect but DF Feeney's family was killed in a murder suicide and he too is now seen as someone who was being framed.

The swamp, sandpit, and pond behind me, the Murphys own that, and 3 people in their family have now died horrifically violent deaths because they, like me were protecting Etiole from the people who would kill him because they believed Bruce's demon and alien lies about Etiole. 

Look at what is being done to me. They drove a backhoe over my house and they murdered my baby and they crippled me, all days apart.

Look at what is being done to the Murphys. And they're massacring the Murphy family. Tim's death the same time as the attack on me.

And look at who screams the loudest hate for Etiole. Look WHO calls him a demon.

And look at WHO the FBI's number one suspect in all of this is.

My family laughs and jokes about this whole thing like they think it's a fucking game. People are dying and the FBI is not laughing. 

Look at WHO keeps attacking my car. Look at WHO keeps cutting the wires off the apartment. Vandalism. Harassment. Bullying. Threats. Evil people Evil things. By their fruits yea shall no them, for no good thing springs from dead wood. Those are small petty crimes, but they are still crimes. But it's far beyond petty crimes. The list of people who have been murdered is quite long now. 13 died just at the Boston marathon bombing. I'm crippled for the rest of my life, and so far, I'm the only person who was attacked who lived through an attack. Every one else they've attacked is dead. Most of them beheaded or killed in a bomb. 7 different bombs, including one in my classroom at college in 2013, two in my workplace in 2015 and 2016, the house in Old Orchard in 2006, and my doctor on Saco Ave in 2003 where the doctor the nurses and 21 patients were killed. And the FBI was on site for every one of them, and my family thinks it's funny to laugh and make jokes about all of it. Because that's they do since the day me and Micheal and Tim Murphy found Etiole

Do you realize for all the shit my parents have pulled,  they've never once apologized for anything. And you know why? Because they aren't sorry. They feel no guilt. They feel no shame. They feel no remorse. Why? Because they hate me. They always have. From the time I was old enough to walk both of them reminded me daily that I was supposed to be a boy to replace the baby boy that was born before me. That's why Grammy Helen was the one who was always with me until I was 8. And after that it was Grammy Eva. And then BW. 

Do you know how I found out Santa wasn't real? Grammy Helen died when I was 8. That year for Christmas there were no Christmas presents. There was just my parents arguing over which one of them should have lowered themselves to buy a gift for the mistake that committed the sin of not being born a boy. I remember that Christmas better than any other. Because that's when found out exactly how much my parents hated me and thought I was worthless because I was a girl.

Look at my MRI scans at the damage the foundation nail through my hip did. The mutilated bones that were shattered when I was 6 years old and no one took me to the hospital. I've walked on a broken leg for almost 50 years. 

Look at the jaw surgery I had to have when I was 42 to repair an injury done to me with a brick when I was 14. 

Look at the Gremlin, 1974 orange, obliterated by a sledgehammer. 

Look at what happened when I was awarded phi theta kappa. No one went to the award ceremony. My mother said it was stupid. My father spent the day raving calling me an educated damned fool. BW was at the temple with Rick. And people with golf clubs were waiting at my car.

Do you realize if just one single person had cared enough to be at the phi theta kappa awards my baby might not have been murdered and I might not be crippled now. 

Grammy Helen would beat my dad's ass for the shit he does to me. And Grammy Eva would be ashamed of the stuff my mother does. Neither Helen or Eva would have let them get away with the constant abuse and harassment.

As for what happened to my car March 9, 2022 - KRA vandalized my car and tried to make it look like my brother did it. KRA stuffed the tailpipe full of McDonald's ketchup packets, which is what caused the fuel line to blow up. I could have died. He tried to kill me and make it look like my brother who works at McDonald's did it so my brother would be blamed.

KRA did the same thing in November, because of some guy named Todd who I supposedly convinced to kill himself via may painting a "suicide demon" on my car. There is a picture of Etiole on my car, that is what they are calling "a suicide demon"



UPDATE: February 27, 2022:

Do not underestimate either my willingness or how far I will go to protect my murdered son's grave from being destroyed by the bastards who are the @FBI s number one suspects in having killed him. The ONLY reason that bitch is hell bent on digging up my farm is because she wants to destroy the evidence of my baby having been murdered by golf clubs.

I'm sick of my mother and my mothers shit head Atwater relatives. They won't stop focusing on the cats. They are lost in a delusional refusal to face reality and that is impeding the fbi investigation of the murder of my baby and the crippling of my spine, because all either of them will do is say there was no baby and tell everyone lies about me and I don't like it. My baby is dead and that has nothing to do with the cats and I'm sick of my mother and her filthy Atwater thugs both ignoring what happened at the college 2 years before the cat event happened AND daily arriving to bully me and say it was “RoseMary’s Baby” and not a real baby because it was a demon, because Etiole was a from.

 

Etiole is not a demon, my baby with him was not a demon, you murdered my fucking baby because you are retarded religion crazed jackasses. Get the fuck out of my life and go burn were evil people like you belong!

 

I'm tired of every time I mention the baby that was murdered November 14, 2013 at Southern Maine Community College,  they wave their hand in my face and say, "no you're just upset about the cats". The cats happened May 14, 2015 and those cats were not mine, they were my mother's cats, that she hid in my motorhome because her landlord Nick didn’t know she had 13 cats in her Birch St apartment. And he evicted her a year later when he found out the cats were hers.

That's why SHE is the one making a fuss about them, not me. I'm not the one running around yapping about the cats constantly,  she is. I'm talking about my son. 

 

My baby boy that was murdered by 3 attackers wielding golf clubs in the SMCC parking lot. A blond woman whom the redhaired woman called Claire, a redhaired woman who the blond woman called Kendra, both in their 60sish, and a bald man in his 30ish.

 

I'm not talking about my mother's cats, I'm talking about my child. What the fuck is wrong with these people? 

 

As for my car … did you all forget when and why I painted it? May 12, 2014. Mother's day. The first mother day after my baby was murdered. I painted my Volo on mother's day to divert my mind from killing myself. That's why I painted my car 9 years ago and you all know that, I've said as much hundreds of times.

Ty Mother and the Atwaters are refusing to acknowledge the baby because also refuse to acknowledge Etiole, a local homeless Jewish man who is the baby's father. 

My Mother and the Atwaters are so damned bigoted and religion crazed that all they’ve ever done is call Etiole a demon or an alien, since the first day they ever saw him: September 23, 1978.

It’s been almost 50fucking years that they’ve harassed him because of what he looks like and harassed me because I won’t let them beat him to death. 

They fully 100% believe he is not human and they run around slandering him every chance they can get and they’ve been doing it for 50 fucking years now. 

And THAT is the ONLY reason, they are doing what they are doing right now. 

 

They have NO RIGHT to be on my land. They are fucking trespassing.

Because they are so damned brainwashed by their fucking religions, that they can’t stop believing anyone who is physically deformed MUST be a Demon.

 

And they’ve spent the last 9 years daily hounding me and whooping and cheering joyous celebration over “killing the demon” as they refer to my baby.

 

In you hadn’t watched the local news - January 2022 - there was a massive FBI raid on Main Street and Cutts Street Biddeford, Maine. 8 of the men who have been roaming Southern Maine beating up pregnant women with golf clubs, were arrested and are now in jail where they belong, soon to be moved to federal prison.

And THAT is what has got the Atwaters in a frenzy now, digging up my land in Old Orchard Beach. They are desperately trying to find my dead baby’s unmarked grave, because they know his gold club shattered skull is very damning evidence for them, now that the FBI made a move and started arresting a bunch of their thugs.

 

And those arrested that just happened, they happened because the FBI phone number was painted on my car and locals in Biddeford, came forward with witness testimony of the attacks.

 

What my mother and the Atwaters are doing is cruel and evil and hateful, and I’m sick of it.

They don’t care about or my life, and my baby or his life. As can be seen by the fact of how he died.

The FBI is still trying to ID the bond Claire woman and the redhaired Kendra woman. They caught the bald man with the 4 door white pick up truck, we now know who he is - the son of the Old Orchard Beach police dispatch woman, the woman who would never let any 911 calls begging for help while these attacks were happening, go through.

Don't be surprised if you see the signs - all 144 of them - go back up in my driveway. Because I'm fucking sick of being harassed, and the agreement to keep the signs down, specified that EVERYONE in Old Orchard Beach - ALL RESIDENTS would NEVER HARASS ME again. You people have broken your agreement. I'm painting new signs as we speak.

EVERYONE - includes real estate agents, developers, contractors, construction workers, and any Atwater bitch who thinks they have the right to daily show up at my Biddeford apartment to say: "What are we going to do about Wendy, she can't keep that land, I need a downpayment on a house, she is going to sell her land and give me the money or else!"

Burn in hell you fucking bitch, and take all your fucking Atwater shitheads with you.

There are more then 500 graves on my farm - more than half of them Native American, some of them buried as far back as the 1400s. I WILL NOT let you touch those graves. I take my job as the guardian of these graves VERY SERIOUSLY. And you WILL have an all out war on your hands if you dare touch them.

Now she's threatening to dig up the graves on my land.

My dead baby means a hell of a lot more to me, then her fucking house. She never gave a damn when my baby died, but look at what she did when the cats died. Her priorities are fucked up.

My dead baby means a hell of a lot more to me, then her fucking house. She never gave a damn when my baby was murdered. But look at what she did when the murderers returned and killed the cats!

Look at what she is STILL doing about the fucking cats!

That's all she cares about. Those damned dead cats and her glut lust to have a mansion in KennebunkPort.

Her priorities are fucked up.

She doesn't give a damn about Human life.

And you know what's worse, the FBI thinks she, her sister Barbara, her brother Bruce, and their friends Claire and Kendra, where the people wearing the fake KuKluxKlan robes and hoods on November 14, 2013, when they used golf clubs to beat my baby to death and break my spine leaving me crippled for the rest of my life. 

Her, Barbara, Bruce, Claire, and Kendra - those are the FBI’s #1 suspects in the murder of my baby, November 14, 2013.

And what the hell is with people mixing up me and my mother? 

I'm NOT the one hell bent on a house. I have been willfully homeless for decades I have no desire for the confines of a house. The one running around yapping hysterics about a house IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one talking about cats. The one running around yapping hysterics about cats IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one talking about Todd, I don't even know who Todd is! I don't know any one named Todd! The one running around yapping hysterics about Todd IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one talking about Mark and Dan and Watson, I don't even know who Mark and Dan and Watson are! I don't know anyone named Mark or Watson and the only Dan I know is my cousin and it's clearly not him she's talking about. The one running around yapping hysterics about Mark and Dan and Watson IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one putting curses on people. I don't believe in curses. The one running around yapping hysterics about curses and claiming she's casting death spells on people IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one talking about demons. I don't believe in demons. The one running around yapping hysterics about demons and calling Etiole a demon IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one calling Etiole a demons. I don't believe in demons. Etiole is a local homeless man and Etiole isn't even his name, I don't use his real name online to protect his identity. I'm not the one who calls him Etiole either. Etiole is the name the Atwaters call him. The one running around yapping hysterics about demons and calling Etiole a demon IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one talking about aliens or UFOs or alien abduction. I don't believe in aliens or UFOs or alien abduction. The one running around yapping hysterics about aliens or UFOs or alien abduction IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one calling Etiole an alien. I don't believe in aliens and besides that, Etiole is a local homeless man. The one running around yapping hysterics and calling Etiole an alien IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

I'm NOT the one talking about Voodoo dolls and Voodoo curses. Voodoo has nothing to do with Voodoo dolls and curses. Voodoo dolls and curses are mumbo-jumbo made up by Hollywood movies and have nothing to do with the Voodoo religion at all. Voodoo is a branch of the Catholic Church. Look it up. Voodoo is a Christian religion. A Voodoo Priest is a type of Catholic Monk. A Voodoo Priestess is a type of Catholic Nun. Voodoo does not cast curses or use voodoo dolls. The one running around yapping hysterics about Voodoo dolls and Voodoo curses IS MY MOTHER NOT ME!

Open your eyes people. Me and my mother don't look that much alike. You should be able to tell the difference between me and her.

Stop showing up in my yard to to attack me because of some fucking shit you argued with my mother about.

If you've got a problem with my mother, take it up with her not me.

Her, Barbara, Bruce, Claire, and Kendra - those are the FBI’s #1 suspects in the murder of my baby, November 14, 2013.

No, I have no updates on Etiole.

He was shot, by a local lunatic.

No, he's not okay.

And I am getting sick of this fucking ass rumour of Etiole being an alien or a demon.

The fact of Etiole being an alien is a stupid urban myth started by some crazy ass locals.

The fact of Etiole being a demon is a stupid urban legend created by some religion crazed nuts.

Etiole is an old man covered with acid burns. His skin is white and face disfigured from acid burns. He's not an alien and he's not a demon. And you people who call him an alien and call him a demon, you're all fucking crazy. 

Etiole is a homeless Jewish man who has no skin because he was tortured in a Nazi concentration camp in France during WW2. He came to Maine in 1953 with a bunch of other refugees, He has post traumatic stress disorder really bad and he's terrified of people. He can't function in normal society, so hides in the forests. He's not an alien, he's not a demon, he's not a cryptid. He's a disfigured old man, now in late 90s. He barely get around. He doesn't you people harassing him like this. Why can't you people leave him alone? Why are you all so damned desperate to believe in aliens or demons that you have to harass a helpless old man? Leave him alone. Why can't you leave him alone? What is wrong with you people?

Read The Amphibious Aliens article, https://www.eelkat.com/AmphibiousAliens.html where way back in 2007, I DEBUNKED every one of you stupid ass alien, cryptic, demon, and haunted car rumours. Amphibious Aliens The Story of Etiole and The World's Most Haunted Car, goes over every event from the 1970s, that started the fucking rumour, and lists off how every alien, demon, and haunted car rumour was proven to be nothing but a hoax started by my mother's brother  Mervin Bruce Atwater. Every single one of those rumours was started by that one man, and were proven to ALL be hoaxes he perpetrated to try to get money out of Dr Larochelle, the man who hit Mervin's younger sister with a car. They tried to convince the old doctor his car had a demon living in it and they scammed the doctor out of $20,000 back in the 1970s. THAT is how and why the demon car rumour got started. I bought the car in 1975. Etiole started living in it in 1978. And that is how me and Etiole got dragged into the fucking ass rumours about a demon car.

The article Amphibious Aliens The Story of Etiole and The World's Most Haunted Car DEBUNKS ALL of the alien, cryptid, demon, and haunted car rumours. Every last one of them.

The car is not haunted and Etiole is not a demon.

You people who believe my car is haunted or think that Etiole is a demon, you are all fucking retarded.

You are slandering me!

You are slandering Etiole!

You are slandering my cars!

I'm sick of it!

Grow up and go get a damned fucking brain!

I'm sick of you people harassing me and Etiole over stupid shit started by brain dead idiots.

If you are having problems with my mother, tell FBI agent Andy Drewer about it not me. Have information, call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

Have information about the murder of my baby, call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

Have information about any of the attacks on my family, call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

Have information about the people who shot Etiole, call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

If you have information about anything, call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322 and give it to him, not me.

https://www.eelkat.com/AmphibiousAliens.html





UPDATE March 8, 2022

One sign is back up. 

How many more go up, is dependent upon YOU.

From now on, every time one of you Old Orchard Beach, Pine Point, or Biddeford shitheads decides to harass me, I'm going to put up another sign.

If you want no more, then you better make dammed sure you keep your friends and family and neighbors out of my yard and out of my life. I'm not selling my land, and I'll not let you dig up those graves.

Burn in hell.

No means no.

And I'm tired of saying no.

Just like rapist, you refuse to take no for an answer.

No. I'm not selling my land and giving you the money so you can buy a house in Kennebunk.

I've said no to you every single week since August 2021. And your current threats to dig up the graves on my land and move them to your land, is why the signs are going back up.

I'm tired of you bullying me.

I'm tired of your threats.

I'm tired of your gaslighting.

I'm tired of your lies.

You keep saying "After all I've done for you!" What have you done for me? When I was 8 years old you locked me in a racoon trap and left me there for 27 years, only letting me out on Sundays so you could parade me around in the Cape Elizabeth and Saco Ward Mormon churches to pedophile priests who paid you so they could rape me. That's why you never had a job until 5 years ago, because you made plenty selling your pre-teen daughter for sex to dirty old men.

You drove a foundation nail through my hip when I was 6 years old.

From the tie I was 14 until I was 42 years old I was near mute, because you broke my jaw with a brick. I was 42 when I had surgery to rebuild my jaw, that's why I can talk today.

You never allowed me or my bothers to go to school or doctors.

YOU took a sledge hammer to my 1974 AMC Gremlin, my 1976 AMC Gremlin, my 1976 AMC Hornet, my Olds station wagon, and you took a chain saw to my 1964 Dodge 330 the worlds most haunted car, the real Christine. YOU did that.

Since 1978 you have harassed me and me boyfriend, the one you call Etiole, because YOU believe he's a demon because of his skin deformities. You and your sister and your brothers contacted MUFON and told them lies about me and Etiole both. You called him the amphibious alien and claimed he had abducted me. Your alien abduction hoax, almost got him killed in 1997 and again in 2007 when ufo crazies arrived in my yard calling him an EBE and trying to shoot him "for science". An elderly man, a French, Jewish Nazis concentration camp survivor who lives in the forest because his PTSD and fear of people is so bad. A man who is scarred with acid burns from being tortured in WW2 and is neither a demon nor an alien and who deeply traumatized by YOUR endless harassment.

It was YOUR friends who drove a backhoe over my house August 8, 2013 because YOU paid them $600 to do so. Because you thought without a house I would sell my land. But I wasn't the one living in that house. My dad lived there. All you did was put him in a Biddeford apartment. I was already living in the tent since May 9, 2006, and I had the Biddeford apartment since February 13, 2007. 

It was YOUR friends who attacked me with golf clubs at Southern Maine Community College, November 14, 2013, while I was 8 months pregnant with Etiole's baby. That they murdered, on YOUR orders, because as YOU put it "It's RoseMary's Baby" while you gibbered about some horror movie about demon babies.

That was YOUR own grandchild that YOU hired those people to kill.

April 10, 2015, YOU broke into my motorhome, put YOUR 13 cats in it, them then brought YOUR friends to attack my family.

We now know the owner of the 4-door white truck, was YOUR visiting teach, Kathy, the driver who tried to kill me, was her son, and the reason the 911 calls didn't go through during each attack, was because she was the 911 dispatcher and her son, driving her 4door white pick up truck, only attacked me she was on duty. They were YOUR friends from the Saco Ward church, YOUR church, attacking YOUR daughter on YOUR orders.

Since August 2021, you arrive at my apartment 3 times a week, to tell me I need to put curses on people at your workplace, citing that I have to, because you're my mother and I'm demon possessed and I should be putting my demons to good use by helping you kill three people you don't like at work.

I'm sick of you calling me demon possessed.

I'm sick of you demanding curses.

You have a severe mental problem and you need psychiatric help.

I'm sick of you spreading slanderous lies about me telling every one around town I cast curses and death spells, when I've never done either.

November 19, 2021, YOU friend Todd commit suicide and YOU told YOUR friends, that me and Etiole used suicide demons to drive him in front of a train.

YOUR friend Todd, who I did NOT know and had never heard of until 6 of YOUR friends showed up at Rotary Park November 21, 2021 to gun down Etiole while screaming that they were "killing the suicide demon", while we were walking my dog.

Something YOU now brag that YOU tricked YOUR friends into do, because you needed to get Etiole off my land in order to convince me to sell it and give YOU the money for a down payment on a house in Kennebunk.

Christmas Eve 2021, you arrived at MY apartment in Biddeford, STOLE my father's psychiatric medicine, medicine he needs to keep him NOT violent, because he has extremely violent schizophrenia and one hell of a criminal record that requires him to never be in the same room with a gun, let alone never have one. He was committed to a mental ward in 2007, and they ONLY let him out because he came to Biddeford to live with ME in MY apartment, and I was monitoring his meds.

After YOU stole his medicine, you took him with you daily to Kennebunk, to a mansion by Bush's house, to daily tell him, you would give him that house if he forced me to sell my land and give you the money from my land to buy that Kennebunk house.

Tell, me, what of THOSE things, is YOU doing anything FOR me?

No, means, no.

I'm done saying NO to you.

You are nothing but a land rapist.

Just like a rapist you refuse to accept No for an answer.

Every week since August 2021, I've said no to you.

No, I will not sell my land and hand you the money so you can buy a house in Kennebunk.

No, means no.

And no, I'm not happy with the fact that because I won't sell my land and give you the money, you are now threatening to dig up the graves on my land and move them to your land.

No, I'm not happy with you saying "You don't need the land, you don't use it, I need a house in Kennebunk, you ought to want to sell your land and give me the money!"

Yes, I do use my land.

Yes, I did see the car YOU dumped behind my motorhome. You have till the end of summer to get it off my land or the police are taking it.

What I do with my land is none of your damned business.

And for your information, my land is where I write my novels. I sit on the hill, and I write every day, all summer long. The only reason I didn't in 2021 is because I had Covid for 3 months.

No, telling me that my grandmother's evil spirit is haunting my land. also does not inspire me to want to sell it.

YOU are an evil, hate fill, mean, cruel, sadistic, child abusing, vindictive sociopath.

Get psychiatric help.

You need it.

What you are doing is wrong and you know it. You won't be so upset about what is painted on my car, if you didn't know it.

You can't hide from the truth forever. 

You can't hide your sins, your crimes, your cruelties forever.

Good things will never come to you, until you stop doing evil things to those around you.


Don't forget, my camera runs 24/7 and it's a simple matter of my uploading the video footage of you doing and saying things thing. Plus a lot of it, you said and did while I was livestreaming so people online have already seen and heard you say and do these things.

Yes, I even have video footage of the 4 bicycle brats who chased the homeless man into the train November 2021.

EVERYTHING, I have said here I have video footage of. That is WHY the FBI have been able to arrest so many people these past few months, in Biddeford.

Cutting the wires off our house November 2021 - you did on a livestream. People saw you do it WHILE you were doing it. 

All 2 of the FedEx workers you demanded death curses for - you did on a livestream.

Stealing my dad's meds - you did on a livestream.

Saying "What are we going to do about Wendy, she can't keep that land, I need a house" - you did on a livestream.

Threatening to dig up the graves on my land - you did on a livestream.

All that n-word stuff you said about the black men at your workplace - you did on a livestream.

People been seeing and hearing you live. They've already seen and heard a lot.

How do you plan to explain away all the hundreds of hours of video footage I have of you breaking into my bedroom during a live stream to threaten me, my family, my land?












To the people who asked about weird emails that you claim you got from someone claiming to be me, here are a few things to consider:

#1: I DO NOT use email and I NEVER have. if you get a letter from me it is going to be written in ink on paper, and in a stamped envelope the mail truck delivered to your mailbox at the end of your driveway. Since 1997 my aunt Barbara has been sending emails out to people CLAIMING they were from me, so in all likelihood whatever you got was actually from her. Her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater did the same thing throughout the early 2000s. And 57 of their children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren have done it at well. No, I’m not special. They do this to THOUSANDS of people. They run a medical scam and pretend to be LOTS of big name famous authors, hoping you’ll click whatever link they put in the email, because the link is going to open a .exe phishing program to steal your credit card data and medical records. The FBI is currently investigating their medical fraud, email fraud, scam operation, so if you ARE getting emails claiming to be from me, PLEASE print up the email ad take it to the FBI office on Middle Street in Portland, Maine. FBI Agent Andy Drewer is in charge of not only the investigation of the 2015 murder of my family, but he is also in charge of the email impersonation fraud, and the stalker doing the email fraud.

#2: As you have stated, the topic of the emails is Etiole... do know that I have NEVER talked about Etiole, with ANYONE, online or offline. Unlike my mother, and her sister, my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater, I happen to respect people’s privacy. As I have said before: Etiole is a Jewish, French, Nazi concentration camp refugee who came to Maine in 1953 with a boatload of about 300 other concentration camp survivors. He is covered with acid burns, so his skin looks ghastly white and horrifically disfigured, which is why he lives in the swamps around the Saco River. he is now in his 90s and is still as homeless as he was in the 1950s. He has severe posttraumatic stress disorder, can not speak/is mute, does not have the mental capacity to function in normal society on any level what so ever, and me and a few others have been taking care of him, giving him food and clothing and supplies and medical attention since 1978. There is nothing else you need to know. You do not need to know where he is or how to find him. If you want to see him, go to y livestream/video archive and watch the VOD where I visited him on livestream so you could see what he looked liked and how crippling his metal condition really is.

#3: I feel I shouldn’t have to say this, but apparently I do NEED to say this: Etiole is NOT an alien, nor is he a demon. The article Amphibious Aliens is free to read online. It goes over all the details of both the alien rumours and the demon rumours and debunks them all, while proving all the proof, including medical records and documentation of the people behind the rumour.

#4: The ONLY person who ever claimed I was abducted by aliens was my uncle Mervin Bruce Atwater, who was the leader of the Mane division of Heaven’s Gate for over 40 years. Heaven’s Gate if you do not know, was the UFO suicide cult who murdered 39 people with poisoned Kool-Aid in California in 1997, because Comet HaleBop flew over that night.

#5: I found out about my so-called alien abduction in 2007, when a MUFON tour group showed up in my yard asking to interview me. They carried with them more than a dozen books by various UFO/alien experts and over 100 newspaper articles, all featuring interviews with my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater, interviews all from the 1970s, 1980s, and 1990s, all of them telling of how I was supposedly a demon possessed child, whose best friend was an alien named Etiole. It was 2007, and it was the first time I had ever heard the term “alien abduction” I didn’t even know what it was. The MUFON group - a group of 30,000 people - standing in my driveway 2007 all wanted to interview me as they pointed out NONE of the 30+ years of several hundred interviews with my aunts and uncles, not ONE of the interviews was WITH ME. This was the source of the April 2007 article titled Amphibious Aliens, where I shocked the MUFON world with the revelation that I was NOT an alien abductee, nor had I ever claimed to be one. It also infuriated me to find out that my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater had been running around telling people about Etiole, as I had never told ANYONE - NOT EVEN THEM - about Etiole. It turns out my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater go their alien and demon stories about Etiole from my mother and THIS is WHY I disowned my mother, shun her, and have had nothing to do with her, or her sister my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater, since 2007. The slanderous alien and demon, gossip, rumours, and lies my mother and her sister my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater spread about me and Etiole are deplorable and I HATE my mother and her sister my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater, and I hope they burn in hell for the alien and demon shit they pulled on me and my homeless boyfriend.

#6: That same Amphibious Aliens article ALSO debunks the stupid ass haunted car rumours. My 1964 Dodge 330 is NOT haunted and we fucking proved that. And AGAIN, the haunted car rumour, is sourced to my aunt Barbara and her brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater. That car ran over my aunt Barbara when she was 2 years old. At the time, the car belonged to Dr. Larochelle of Ocean Ave Old Orchard Beach, Maine. My than 2-year-old aunt Barbara almost died and her older brothers Richard Merlin Atwater and Mervin Bruce Atwater and David Atwater, came up with a haunted car/demon possession hoax to scam that elderly doctor out of $20,000, which my grandmother Eva Viola Atwater spent on a 3 year trip to Hawaii in 1973. The Atwaters scammed and terrorized the doctor so badly, that he sold the car to me in 1975 for $5 because he was convinced it was attacking people. The car became famous in 1983 when my then neighbour Stephen King used the demon possession story of my car as the basis for his book Christine. He named the car Christine because Christine is my real name and I owned the actual car. Stephen King returned 10 years later in 1994 to film the Thinner movie in my yard, because I’m the real world “Gypsy Witch” (priestess) that he based his fictional Gypsy Witch in Thinner off of. The movies Christine and Thinner are what in turn made ME famous, and started locals accusing me of being a witch with a demon car.

And as for the fucking Thinner movie - those bastards were trespassers. They just showed up unannounced, barged in, set up filming, without permits or licenses or contracts or permission or even telling us ahead of time that they were coming. No one in Stephen King’s crew acted legally, we are not in that movie willingly, they were not on our farm legally, no one ever received a penny for any of it, and to make things worse, Steven King had no right or permission to go o late night television and tell people my home address and tel his fucking fans to “go visit the Thinner Gypsies of Saco Maine”. They had no right to be on my farm, they had no right to be filming my family. They just dropped in one day. We had no clue who they were or why they were there and it took us fucking 5 hours to chase those trespassing bastards and their film crew off our farm.

In short: I don’t use email, so you NEVER got an email from me. I’m not a witch. My car isn’t haunted. Etiole is not a demon. Etiole is also not an alien. And I was never abducted by aliens.

Also, I don’t know what you are talking about with the house stuff. I’m NOT trying to build a house, I’ve NEVER tried to build a house, I have never applied for a house permit, I’ve never been denied for a house permit because I’ve never even tried to get one. You clearly have me mixed up with someone else.

I’m at 146 Portland Ave. I have 2 neighbours who are building a house: 144 Portland Ave next door to me and 139 Portland Ave across the street from me. I think you mean one of them. My neighbour at 144, has been trying to build a house for 17 years and the town hall has been giving them the runaround. I think SHE at 144 Portland Ave is the one you mean, not me at 146. You seem to have us mixed up somehow.

SHE at 144 is the one putting in a septic system, not me at 146. I’m the one with the pink motorhome and the 35-year-old black Volvo. she’s the one with the brand new big black car and the log cabin house.

You have seriously mixed the two of us up big time.

Understandable considering it was HER family at 144 fighting with the Cyr Clan over a septic tank in 2014, and the Cyr Clan hired a hitman who accidentally murdered MY children, ten of them and nailed their heads to my motorhome door, at 146 than the white-haired man with the green pick-up truck has spent the last 7 years TELLING YOU via running up the street knocking on doors, tell you that it was EelKat trying to build a house, ONLY telling you that to try to cover his ass for mixing up my children at 146 when it was my neighbours children at 144 that was the ACTUAL target.

This is not speculation, the FBI have 100% positive proof that she and her children, not me and my children were the intended target because her family was having a fight with some Connecticut based heroin drug gang that calls itself the Cyr Clan over the septic tank. The hit men the Cyr Clan hire got the wrong house when they murdered my family. And now the Cyr Clan’s trying to convince you that I was the one building a house. I have no interest in a house. Why would I? I’m a Gypsy, I’ve never lived in a house. I’ve always lived in cars and tents my whole life. I have no interest in a house on any level whatsoever. I don’t NEED one, I never have. And you local people should know that. When my health is bad, I rent apartments in Biddeford. I’ve done this for 50 years now. You know that. You ALL know that. I’ve owned 146 Portland Ave since 1975. You people know me. Why are you pretending you don’t?

I’m the feral child who lived in a cage in a woodshed from the time I was 8 until I was 31. Did you all forget that? Etiole was the local homeless man who used to break into the woodshed and break the lock off the cage and take me out into the swamp to hide me from my bastard uncles. Did you forget that too? The ONLY reason any of you spread your fucking rumours and lies about me and Etiole, calling me a witch and Etiole a demon or alien, and spreading lies about me building houses, is because my Uncle Bruce and his Heaven’s Gate friends, told you those lies.

Did you forget what Heaven’s Gate is, what they fucking did? They are an UFO Alien Cult, who murdered 39 people with poisoned koolaid, because they comet Hale Bop was God’s fucking mother ship. They see fucking aliens EVERYWHERE. In everything. And THEY are the ones who started the stupid ass rumour of Etiole being an alien.

Look at the SOURCE of the alien abduction rumour. My Uncle Mervin Bruce Atwater. One of George Applewhite’s thugs. George Applewhite, a follower of Jim Jones, that’s WHY they killed everyone with kool-aid, because they were fans of Jim Jones, and they wanted to jump onboard God’s mothership like Jonestown did! Did you forget that? THAT fucking lunatic, a fan of Jim Jones, who worked for George Applewhite, called Etiole an alien, because Bruce CALLED EVERYONE aliens.

Bruce locked me in a cage, and Etiole broke me out of it and hide me in the swamps, and THAT is what Bruce called an alien abduction. But Etiole is no alien. He’s just a local homeless man. Etiole’s not even his name. I don’t tell anyone his name to protect him from you fucking jackasses who are too stupid to believe he’s just a normal man. My uncle Buce is a fucking lunatic who spends 24 hours a day gibbering madness and nonsense about aliens and demons.

As for the garbage that keeps being dumped on my land… you have all SEEN the big green dump truck with the black and silver striped nose, that illegally trespasses on my land and dumps that fucking garbage.

Open your eyes and look around. You can SEE the truth. The house being built is at 144 Portland Ave NOT 146. You can SEE that, now that the house is up.

Like I’ve been saying right along, it is NOT me building a house. It NEVER has been. I don’t know why you let that idiot try to gaslight you with lies about me building a house, when you can SEE the house is NOT going up on MY land. It’s going up on my NEIGHBOUR’S land.

I know you people are NOT THAT stupid. The white-haired man with the green pickup truck is LYING to you, and you can SEE that for yourselves, just by looking at WHICH property the house is being built on.

Look around... does it LOOK like there is a house being built at 146 Portland Ave where the pink motorhome is? Use your brain and open your eyes. See the truth. The truth will set you free.

Now look next door to 144, you CAN SEE that THEY NOT ME are the one building a house, now that it’s almost finished.

I’d say the white-haired man in the green pickup truck has a lot of explaining to do, like explaining WHY h’s hell bent on trying to convince the town I’m the one putting up a house, when I’ve never even applied for a building permit. Building permits are public record. Go look at the town hall for yourself.

Also, please explain to me HOW the white-haired man with the green pick truck has such very detailed info about the murder of my family, when the records are sealed, not public access, and about 90% of the details were withheld from the public and are know ONLY to myself, the murderer, the police, and FBI? There is ZERO public access to the stuff h is saying happened on April 10, 2015... you know that, right? So HOW did he get the info he has? Explain THAT.

please report any future such emails you receive to FBI agent Andy Drewer 207-774-9322

>>>I’m just more cowardly than they are and I’m afraid of the truth and criticism. In your opinion, what makes someone mean?

When I think of mean, I think of my uncles. 3 in particular. My mother had 12 older brothers and 3 of them all claimed to be “king” (we are Gypsies, Gypsy Kings are a thing). And they fought over it badly. They ended up jointly ruling over the clan, each competing with each other to out-king the other, each doing progressively meaner things to the clan members, especially the female children.

Things they did, just to me, included:

When I was 4 Uncle Bruce stabbed me with a foundation nail - an iron rod over 2 feet long - he drove into my hip, through my pelvis and out my other thigh. I have been crippled and walked with a cane since I was a toddler, because of it. His reason? I was unable to memorize the entirety of chapter 1 of the book of Genesis.

When I was 8 years old, same uncle locked me in a cage that was made for trapping raccoons. He gave me 1 salted herring fish to eat once every 12 days. He let me out only on Sundays to go to church. I lived in that cage for 27 years, until the Heaven’s Gate FBI raid shut down Heaven’s Gate in 1997, after they killed 39 people with Kool-aid. Yes, I am THAT EelKat, the child who lived in a cage, the feral child you see pictures of in almost every college Psychology book. I am the child who survived Heaven’s Gate because I was locked in a cage in a woodshed when they drank their kool aid under the shadow of comet HaleBop. I was 31 years old when the FBI raid rescued me from that cage.

When I was 14 years old, because I was unable to recite from memory the entire book, all chapters of Ecclesiastes, that same uncle beat me in the face with a cinder block brick, breaking my jaw, and cause me to be “mute” until had surgery to fix my jaw when I was 42 years old. From the time I was 14 until 42, I was unable to speak due to the damage of my jaw.

In those 27 years from age 8 to age 31, I was let out of the cage every Sunday to be taken to church and sold or $12k to the priests, who raped me repeatedly, weekly, for 27 years.

While my uncle helped Applewhite to run Heaven’s Gate, he fled the night of Hale Bop. He did not kill himself with everyone else.

Social workers took me after the FBI raid. It took them years to teach me how to not be terrified by the sight of Humans. They say I suffer from having no outward sign of emotions, and that it was caused by my never having experienced a single good event in my early life.

At the time of the FBI raid at 144, 146, and 148 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, I was one of more than 120 girls the FBI rescued out of cages. All of whom had been raped hundreds of times by priests from Cape Elizabeth, Saco, and Sanford wards of the LDS/Mormon church. Including 16 bishops, an OOB town manager, and several OOB motel owners, all of whom were in the habit of paying $12k to rape girls under the age of 10 years old.

The man with the green truck, who likes to spread rumours about me and Etiole and my house, was one of Bruce’s top customers. He had a thing for numbers and raped 7-year-olds, 14-year-olds, and 21-year-olds because he was obsessed with doing everything in 7s.

After years of social workers teaching me how to live with normal, not abusive Humans. I was 37 when I got my GED and while I was at the high school doing that, those uncles built a grease fryer bomb burned my house down to punish me for getting a GED.

2 years later, while I was in college taking classes to learn grammar and writing, three of them, that same uncle and 2 women I had never seen before, arrived at the college armed with golf clubs and attacked me when I was coming out of the college. I was 8 months pregnant at the time. They killed my baby, broke my spine, broke my hip, broke my pelvis, broke my knees. I was paralyzed for 5 months. It took me 18 months to get out of the wheelchair and relearn to walk, and to this day I am still crippled.

That’s the price I paid to learn how to read and write, in a culture that believes it is okay to execute women who commit the sin of learning how to write.

August 8, 2013, that same uncle paid a local construction worker $600 to drive a backhoe over my house.

April 10, 2015, that same uncle and a group of 74 members of the new reorganized Heaven’s Gate, attacked my farm. 14 men held me down with guns to my head, while the others used hand band saws to kill and behead 10 of my 12 children and then nailed their heads to my door.

And it’s very easy to Google the news reports and photos of all of it.

That is what I think of when I hear the word “mean”. My uncle Bruce was a very mean person.

My uncle Bruce Mervin Atwater is a monster. And he calls EVERYONE an alien abductee or a demon. Did you fucking forget that?

No, I have no updates on Etiole.

He was shot by a local lunatic.

No, he’s not okay.

And I am getting sick of this fucking ass rumour of Etiole being an alien or a demon.

The fact of Etiole being an alien is a stupid urban myth started by some crazy ass locals.

The fact of Etiole being a demon is a stupid urban legend created by some religion crazed nuts.

Etiole is an old man covered with acid burns. His skin is white and face disfigured from acid burns. He’s not an alien, and he’s not a demon. And you people who call him an alien and call him a demon, you’re all fucking crazy.

Etiole is a homeless Jewish man who has no skin because they tortured him in a Nazi concentration camp in France during WW2. He came to Maine in 1953 with a bunch of other refugees. He has posttraumatic stress disorder really bad and he’s terrified of people. He can’t function in normal society, so hides in the forests. He’s not an alien, he’s not a demon, he’s not a cryptid. He’s a disfigured old man, now in late 90s. He barely get around. He doesn’t you people harassing him like this. Why can’t you people leave him alone? Why are you all so damned desperate to believe in aliens or demons that you have to harass a helpless old man? Leave him alone. Why can’t you leave him alone? What is wrong with you people?

Read The Amphibious Aliens article, where back in 2007, I DEBUNKED every one of you stupid ass alien, cryptic, demon, and haunted car rumours. Amphibious Aliens The Story of Etiole and The World’s Most Haunted Car, goes over every even from the 1970s, that started the fucking rumour, and lists off how every alien, demon, and haunted car rumour was proven to be nothing but a hoax started by Mervin Bruce Atwater. Every single one of those rumours was started by that one man, and were proven to ALL be hoaxes he perpetrated to try to get money out of Dr Larochelle, the man who hit Mervin’s younger sister with a car. They tried to convince the old doctor his car had a demon living in it and they scammed the doctor out of $20,000 back in the 1970s. THAT is how and why the demon car rumour got started. I bought the car in 1975. Etiole started living in it in 1978. And that is how me and Etiole got dragged into the fucking ass rumours about a demon car.

The article Amphibious Aliens The Story of Etiole and The World’s Most Haunted Car DEBUNKS ALL of the alien, cryptid, demon, and haunted car rumours. Every last one of them.

The car is not haunted and Etiole is not a demon.

You people who believe my car is haunted or think that Etiole is a demon, you are all fucking retarded.

You are slandering me!

You are slandering Etiole!

You are slandering my cars!

I’m sick of it!

Grow up and go get a damned fucking brain!

I’m sick of you people harassing me and Etiole over stupid shit started by brain dead idiots.

And the same goes for the so-called World’s Most Haunted Car. That rumour was started by the same person. That car was proved years ago, to have a mechanical issue that caused it to start and drive ahead until it hit something. No one ever thought to look at the starter. I’m the 3rd owner of the car. I changed the malfunctioning starter and a so called ‘haunted” stuff the car did, went away. It was a problem with the starter, only that and nothing more.

And these people in Biddeford right now, getting you all worked up - if you hadn’t noticed they ARE Mervin Bruce Atwater’s family.

So it’s STILL the same one fucking person running around getting things stirred up. The Atwaters. My fucking uncles. Like usual.

Yesterday at Rotary Park, Biddeford, Maine, a group of people armed with rifles, went down the track team trail behind the soccer field and started shooting... scared the crap out of the 50 or so children and their 100+ parents, got the 30+ dogs in the dog park howling... the sky filled with thousands of Canadian geese, and the park goers assumed the group was hunting geese and started commenting on the fact that hunting was not allowed in Rotary Park.

A few minutes later, a grey/white haired, bearded man, who looks a lot like Kenny Rogers, but not as fat, with a black dog of a German Shepard-Lab mix look, and a woman with pageboy greyish-blond hair, both about late 60s, marched up to me in the park, bragged they had killed Etiole, stating that he has caused their son whom they called “Todd” to jump in front of a train 3 days earlier.

You know what, I knew that homeless man and HE never mentioned it.

You people are just looking for someone to blame, and think because I’m not white, I wear a hijab, and I have a mural painting on my car, you think you are justified on pointing blame at me for something I had no part in.

That homeless man was obsessed with the fact that his dog and son had been taken away from him.

It’s NOT the evil eye as they called it. It’s The eye of The Grigori Archangels aka The Watchers, from the Apocrypha in the Bible. It’s the blue wings of the Seraphim Archangels aka The Watchers. The Watchers are my Guardian angels. I paint them on everything, I sew it on tapestries, it’s on my car, my motorhome, I embroider it on pillows and clothes, paint it on mirrors, paint canvases art for art galleries with it. It’s the blue eyes wings of the archangels as described in the Bible. I’m not sure why they were calling it the Evil Eye.

It’s the Eye of God, the hamsa. A Jewish protection symbol. Etiole’s Jewish, he draws it on everything, so that’s why I do as well.

I’m sick of you jackasses spreading you wild ass rumours about me.

You’re nothing but a bunch of trouble making busy bodies who can’t mind your own fucking business.

I’m not bothering a single damned one of you, so why the fuck are you bothering me?

Why can’t you stupid ass people leave me alone?

There is no reason for a damned one of you to be in my yard.

There is no reason for a damned one of you to be chasing down Etiole.

There is no reason for a damned one of you to be having psychotic meltdowns over my car!

What is wrong with you people?

Fucking brain dead herd mentality that’s all this is.

One of you ran around screaming like a lunatic and rest of you all decided to join in.

But I also ask... WHY would you be scared of me or Etiole? It makes me ask who has been feeding you lies about me? Who has been feeding you lies about Etiole?

I am a crippled elderly woman. I can barely stand up. I’ve been paralyzed and bedridden since the golf club attack November 14, 2013. I’m only just now in 2021 just starting to walk again, and I can barely do that. I have no grip strength so I struggle to even hold me cane. The golf clubs damaged my spine, my nerves, most of my organs don’t function because of the nerve damage to my spine. I struggle to even breath, just sitting up in bed is enough to collapse my lungs. I have no bladder or bowel movement control, I have to wear diapers. What exactly is it you think I can even do?

And Etiole? The old hermit Nazi concentration camp survivor? He’s over 100 years old now, he hasn’t been able to walk, or sit up, or eat on his own, in almost 20 years. He’s dying. What exactly are you expecting him to do?

Etiole is NOT an alien.

Etiole is not a demon.

I am not a witch.

None of my cars are haunted.

I’ve been saying it for years. Why won’t you listen to me?

You are slandering me!

You are slandering Etiole!

You are slandering my cars!

I’m sick of it!

Grow up and go get a damned fucking brain!

I’m sick of you calling Etiole a demon.

I’m sick of you calling Etiole an alien.

I’m sick of you calling me a witch.

I’m sick of you saying one car after another is haunted.

This whole thing boils down to your fucking white privilege. You know that right?

Your white ass can’t stand the fact that we non-white Gypsies live here, so you have to make up stupid ass supernatural spooky shit about us.

You don’t like that I wear the traditional dress of my people instead of dressing like an American, so you feel justified in calling me a witch and making up spook occult lies about me.

I wear hijab and veils and caftan and silk and it bother’s you that I’m not scum diving in trashy t shirts and jeans like the rest of you.

I paint my cars, same as we painted our wagons and vardos for centuries, and it bothers you because it looks different.

Etiole is a Jew, and your anti-Semite white privilege kicks in to hate him for being born Jewish.

Etiole has scars, so you’re scared of him

I’m different.

Etiole’s different.

My cars are different.

And when you get right down to it, that’s ALL any of this is about.

Me, Etiole, and my cars don’t fit in with your fucking ass white privileged ideas of “normal” and that makes you uncomfortable and you try to make the uncomfortable go away by dehumanizing us with your stupid ass rumours.

There are no witches.

There are no aliens.

There are no demons.

There are just a bunch of whinny ass white privileged brats running around making trouble for anyone who’s not white enough for them.

Grow the fuck up!

Developing Better Writing Skills
or answering the question:
"Why do people see fictional style as being illiterate?"

Developing Better Writing Skills
or answering the question:
"Why do people see fictional style as being illiterate?"



Uhm... I don’t even know where to begin.

We are going to use a strange email as an example of what you should NOT write and hopefully everyone who reads this will see how they can take this email and use it to become better writers and develop better writing skills.

Perhaps, someday even the person who wrote this email, will stumble across this page and realize WHY a TOR editor called them illiterate.

It is fairly obvious that this email was intended to be sent to someone else and somehow got sent to me by mistake, so at first I was going to just toss it aside. But than I got to thinking, the grammar of this email is so bad, maybe I can use it as a writing lesson to help other improve their own writing. 

And so, here we are. I'm going to post this email, than I'm gong to answer it. Hopefully my answer will show you what they did wrong and help you to avoid making the same mistakes.

I think the person who wrote this email may be drunk or high or off their meds or... something. 

Also, I’m wondering if they sent the email to the incorrect person? Parts of it appears to be written as though they were replying to something, but this is no one I’ve ever heard of before. Perhaps they mistyped the email address and mine was 1 letter or number off from the person they were sending this too?

I don’t know.

In trying to translate the mindless, gibbering, rambling, I think, it sounds like they got rejected by TOR, sort of, It sounds like TOR liked their manuscript and asked them to make some grammar changes to make it sound less illiterate, and rather than jump on the rare opportunity to get published by one of the biggest of the Big 5, they got drunk and wrote this email and for some reason sent it to me. 

That’s what it looks like at least. Near as I can tell.

All I can say with any assuredness is that the subject title of the email, certainly matches the body contents of the email.

The subject/title is: “Why do people see fictional style as being illiterate?” and the contents of the body are certainly illiterate, that’s for sure.

On some levels I’m wondering if it’s someone’s idea of a joke, given that the subject was: “Why do people see fictional style as being illiterate?” and then the contents of the body is the most utterly illiterate tripe of gibberish I’ve ever read.

This person claims to be an editor and yet, it’s clear they don’t have even a basic 3rd grade level grasp on the English language. The grammar is barely legible. And the train of thought jumps topics mid sentence, and has clearly skipped major thought points in between the jumps leaving it impossible to figure out what they are talking about at all.

The email starts out okay, but quickly devolves into gibberish.

But rather than try to describe it to you, I’m just going to copy and paste the entire email and let you read it for yourself.

I’m not sure what to think of this email. I’ll try to answer it, seeing how they sent it to me. But damn, this is an email you have to see to believe, so here it is in it’s entity ... read it and see what you think about this wild gibbering illiterate mess of unedited train of thought:

.................

The email:

Why do people see fictional style as being illiterate?

I feel, just talking about my work and knowing I've completed it and it's one piece of the 10+ books in my world, gives me some form of excitement about it all. It shows that I still have a lot to improve and that's exciting too. Some people read my work and it's so cool to discuss my characters like they're actual characters, even if I haven't published yet, and I definitely want to polish it more.

I don't know what it is. Maybe it's an accumulation of everything I'm facing in life as once but it was really passionate about this work. I wrote the novel in 5 months and then proofread it. And began pitching it but so far only rejections (I don't think they go to me as I can still feel excited and I want to improved) but I just don't feel the love I did back then. I'm going over it again and even have ideas on how to improve it, but I don't feel the same energy.

I help people as an editor, and I think I'm good at at it. I know a lot about story as a whole, and it's easy for me to help writers in multiple ways.

But for my own stories... It just feels like they keep growing in my head, and I keep getting cool ideas I want to write about, but I can't seem to get to work. It's a weird feeling because I was able to have the discipline to finish my novel in 5 months and it was my third attempt at a novel too. Some part of me thinks the writing sucks how because I've grown and look back at it, but then I'm like I'm over thinking it because most people won't be so critical about it as I am - people usually do end up what I write (not sure why though haha).

Another issue is that since I have a lot of ideas, I wrote this first novel to introduce my world. It was a standalone piece with sequel potential, but I didn't really write it to have a sequel. But now I'm getting some ideas for that too.

I've been writing another story in the same universe, shorter than my main idea for the world but still much larger than my existing novel and it just seems so hard to juggle 10s of characters because I want each to feel fulfilling in every aspect. And also, what if I write something weird or wrong now, and ruin the foreshadowing/logic of things to come later. I want it all to make sense and the more the ideas keep growing, especially as I have characters I want to continue in different books so I don't want to lose a feeling of continuity...

But then again, even published and professional books and shows make these kinda mistakes and I'm probably overthinking it. But I just want that passion for writing back where life and the ropes of recognition didn't bind me. I'm not sure how to find that again.

I've talked about this a lot. With myself and others. But it's been months of not writing and I tell myself I want to write everyday but then I either I procrastinate or life gets in the way... Like I shouldn't even be writing this post.

I just wonder how I had the discipline to work on my craft before, and now I feel burnt out for months.

So much that it irks me, not that I'm in that situation, but more so that that's just how things work. Which is very normal, but it does make me question why people like simpler prose, when a lot of depth in writing actually comes from an author's way of words.

For me, I would normally opt a visual story over a book just because how simple a book is. So usually, it's the way something is written which draws me in. I can see the effort put into the words. And that shows quality over quantity.

Nothing is stopping me. I was just having a thought at how critical some on social media can take a comment/post and judge someone's whole life or career over it. Just a thought.

But people who don't understand this... I just don't understand what's so hard about it.

It's not that everyone doubts or misunderstands my work, but some do.

Which makes this process quite weird and way more subjective than something similar in a visual medium.

But if you do something even remotely off the path in fiction writing, oh my look at you, you don't even know English grammar.

But the same logic can be applied to simple styles with no defining identity.

I won't be naming anyone, obviously, but they exist for sure. And it really makes me question how some authors are published.

Essentially, that "good" is subjective.

And also that people are way more picky about petty stuff when it comes to writing compared to other art.

I mean I had an editor at Tor read it and I think he read it cuz he liked it. But then he gave me some points. But now I thinking and thought of how to integrate those points but I also don't want to lose my own vision... But it's Tor too...

It scares me even more because he didn't talk about publishing but he did read it and his response was professional. He only gave me one vague line that he liked it but that seemed the most appropriate way to go about feedback. I doubt he would have requested full MS if he didn't like what he read.

Firstly, never once did I say I was better. I don't know how that came to be. I just noticed some errors and style differences. I've noticed errors in writing I enjoyed. I've had experienced readers say to me, who enjoy Sanderson, that his prose isn't strong. No one is perfect, and popularity doesn't indicate quality. It's so easy to throw out a famous name as an example of prestige when there are many factors that go into it.

Secondly, I understand. It's easier to work on first drafts or guide others, but I can't see my work from fesh eyes and so I was just wondering how others self edit their work.

A lot of the times I think my work just sucks so it's a very weird situstion for me to be in. I'm just trying to understand my own writing because I've had people say my work is good, in fact if I'm being honest, it's all I ever hear which raises even more questions but I don't think they're saying it to be nice at all because of the context of are talks.

I know what I do, but sometimes it's easy to lose track of it or get lost in the work. I just came here for suggestions and perspectives, not to be told how the industry by a certain someone who thinks they know better when I've been in contact with professionals before...

A) I do doubt my work, regardless. B) Even after feedback, it makes me doubt my work more. I just don't under why an editor at Tor would read my work for no reason at all. It's left me very confused. As he's been nice to me and I want to send it again, but I'm so unsure about it now. C) Yes. I've lost interest in this work currently. But I do like writing as a whole. But this whole industry seeking thing has made it hard. It was so much easier to write before I tried seeking publishing.

I've studied Psychology. I don't need your feedback when you know nothing about me.

Thank you.

And yes, just send me a chat message and we can do something about the sample. I think I need to have confidence in myself, but I by no means think I'm better than everyone, especially when art is subjective.

I don't have to prove anything to anyone. But some part of me is glad you did it, now I know. I think it's better to just stop asking social media...

And the thing about people's point is that people would form a judgement before reading the work, then one after reading the work, then another after reading my other styles. The outcomes is usually positive.

How easy it is for people to flip flop and assume things when they have almost no context (and the downvotes I get, just for expressing my views, show that).

I like criticism as it allows me ample perspective into my world, and how I can apply it to make it even better. And I have been applying it, and it feels good to be able to think about the work.

So when someone recommended books and authors, I was appreciative of their comment. I even said thanks but even that was downvoted lmao.

But people giving me general advice I already know, doesn't add much. And when I try to give my view, it's like I'm automatically wrong. And no, I'm not taking social media seriously. And I write both for myself and others, so I'm always trying to reach a balance that's best for us, but I also don't want to lose the reason I write.

I was just wondering how others express their style. But so far, I've seen people struggle with their works and then give critique like they're perfect, it's just a sad situation. People don't even know my background.

I think it came out well. My writing experience has been very different.

But anything can be improved.

I truly believed it was in a good state overall, from a story perspective. But now since time has passed and from the feedback I've gotten, I've ideas to make it better but that's only natural.

Also, I got into writing pretty past, and wrote it fast, and submitted it. I never knew about a lot of stuff. It all hit me like a train. And honestly, I'm happy for it. I see so many people stuck in stuff and questioning that do they have to follow this rule or that... I was free of it all.

And maybe I've attained a bit of that curse now, but overall writing is free and that's how it should be.

.............

Well, there it is.

What do you think of it?

Where you able to understand it? Because I certainly wasn’t.

It’s 91,755 words long, nearly as long as the answers you find here on my website.

I’m not sure if I should do one of my usual line by line answers or not, because if I do that, damn, this page is going to be super, mega long.

Should we do a line by line response to this bizarre email?

I think we have to, just because of how much it jumps topic.

Well, let’s have a go at it...


>>>Why do people see fictional style as being illiterate?

Do they?

In nearly 5 decades of writing, publishing, running an advice column for writers, being the editor in chief of 2 literary magazines, and dealing with literally tens of thousands of writers, publishers, reviewers, editors, and critics, I’ve NEVER heard anyone call the fiction format “illiterate”.

I'm wondering if you even know what illiterate means.

It means a person who doesn’t have a clear grasp on grammar and is incapable of communicating with others because they can’t speak or write in proper grammar.

And... you most certainly ARE illiterate. Your email is a glaring testimony of that.

Being illiterate in itself is not a bad thing, but if you plan to be a writer who seeks publication, you DO NEED to have at minimum a working knowledge of high school grammar, and you don’t have that. Please go back and read the email you sent to me and you’ll see what I mean.

You ARE in desperate need of taking English grammar Remedial Adult Ed classes.

Your grammar is absolutely, utterly atrocious. A grade school child would have trouble reading it. Yes your grammar is that bad.

If your manuscript is written in even a quarter of the horrendously atrociously bad grammar you used in this email, you’ll never get published.

Being fiction isn’t why they called your work illiterate.

They called your work illiterate because, you most certainly ARE illiterate, and you need to accept that and work on fixing it. Until you learn how to use grammar correctly, you have no hope of ever being published.

And you mentioned that a TOR editor liked your story, but wanted you to fix the illiterate grammar.

And rather than fix the bad grammar and resubmit the manuscript again, you write this gibbering bull shit to other authors?

Damn.

You arrogant little fool. Do you have any idea what type of publishing contract you just threw away?

TOR makes movie deals. Chances are very high that if you get published with TOR, you’ll get made into a movie as well.

You are so arrogant, so self righteous, so unwilling to improve your flaws, that you’d throw away a TOR contract?

WOW!

Not only are you illiterate, you are also the biggest fool of an idiot I’ve ever encountered in the publishing industry.

Why don’t you just higher an editor to improve your draft, take some remedial Grammar classes, and spend a few months rewriting the draft, than send it in to that TOR editor again?

Clearly he liked it and wants to publish it.

TOR doesn’t take first time authors and they don’t read anything unless an agent sent it. I don’t know how you got your manuscript in the hands of one of their editors, but damn, your story must be VERY good for them to consider a first time author without and agent.

You’ve got a really good deal on your hands here.

Don’t throw this opportunity away.

Get off you ass and learn to write pristine, correct, proper grammar, fix the manuscript and send it back to him.

If you want to get better at something, you have to practice and writing is no exception. Editing your grammar is a part of the writing process. Learn hw to do it. Than practice, practice, practice.

You have a big house editor who thinks your story is good, but thinks your grammar is illiterate and has asked you to fix your grammar.

Get a book on grammar and use it to edit your story. 

>>>I feel, just talking about my work and knowing I've completed it and it's one piece of the 10+ books in my world, gives me some form of excitement about it all. It shows that I still have a lot to improve and that's exciting too. Some people read my work and it's so cool to discuss my characters like they're actual characters, even if I haven't published yet, and I definitely want to polish it more.

10+ books and you sound like you've burned out before even finishing the first one? That's not a good sign.

This line sounds like you are still ready to go at it, but the rest of your email sounds like you've lost interest and given up on the idea.

You won't get far in this career if you get so badly deflated after one editor rejects your manuscript.

Sorry, but you need a reality check here. The average writer will get 130 rejection slips before they publish their first novel.

Get a backbone, grow some balls, edit your manuscript, and try sending it out again.

It's what writers do.

Here you admit you have a lot to improve. Later you bitch about how great it is and doesn't need fixing. Than you go back to saying it does need fixing and talk about giving up on the project because there is no excitement in editing.

Writing is hard work.

Yes, it's fun. But it's not fun 24/7.

There is a lot of long, boring, grinding, hard work, and if you ONLY want to stick around for the fun parts and shirk off the hard stuff, than this career is not for you.

>>>I don't know what it is. Maybe it's an accumulation of everything I'm facing in life as once but it was really passionate about this work. I wrote the novel in 5 months and then proofread it. And began pitching it but so far only rejections (I don't think they go to me as I can still feel excited and I want to improved) but I just don't feel the love I did back then. I'm going over it again and even have ideas on how to improve it, but I don't feel the same energy.

It's called the Newlywed Effect. It means the honeymoon is over and reality is starting to set it.

Fun and games are done, goofing off and lazing around are over. It's time to buckle up, knuckle down and start grinding away at the whet stone until you've polished that manuscript into crisp, clean, perfection.

>>>I help people as an editor, and I think I'm good at at it. I know a lot about story as a whole, and it's easy for me to help writers in multiple ways.

Uhm... honey, given how utterly atrocious your grammar is, I think you need to find a new line of work. If you can't be bothered to edit your own email correctly, than I sure as hell wouldn't recommend you as an editor to a newbie writer.

It's painfully clear you are one of those know-nothing FIVVER editors who can't tell his own ass from a hole in the ground, and not a real, actual, professional editor working for a publishing house.

You aren't even writing at a 3rd grade level.

That means an 8 year old can edit better than you can.

That's truly terrifying.

With how bad your grammar is, how extremely illiterate you grammar is, you have no business trying to edit other people's writing.

You are simply not qualified on any level at all.

Work on learning how to edit your own emails before you try to edit other people.

>>>But for my own stories... It just feels like they keep growing in my head, and I keep getting cool ideas I want to write about, but I can't seem to get to work. It's a weird feeling because I was able to have the discipline to finish my novel in 5 months and it was my third attempt at a novel too. Some part of me thinks the writing sucks how because I've grown and look back at it, but then I'm like I'm over thinking it because most people won't be so critical about it as I am - people usually do end up what I write (not sure why though haha).

Ideas are everywhere.

Ideas are easy to get.

Ideas are a dime a dozen.

Ideas are meaningless and will never become novels.

You need characters.

No one cares about an idea.

Readers care about characters.

Either you are using the word ideas very, seriously wrong here and you haven't got a clue what you are talking about, which given how bad your grammar is, I feel if highly likely, or, you simply have no clue how a novel is put together.

In fact, your email reads like you are someone who has never read a novel in their life and wouldn't know a novel if it hit you in the face.

People who read a lot, usually have a good grasp on grammar and can write at very professional levels.

You are writing borderline gibberish that is disturbingly illiterate and you don't seem to be aware of how really, really, really bad your grammar really is.

>>>Another issue is that since I have a lot of ideas, I wrote this first novel to introduce my world. It was a standalone piece with sequel potential, but I didn't really write it to have a sequel. But now I'm getting some ideas for that too.

Uhm... do you even know what a novel is?

Have you ever even read a novel?

Novels aren't about worlds. Novels are about people.

Novels tell the story of a snippet of a character's life.

You're writing a novel, not a travel guide. You know that, right?

Are you sure what you are writing is not a world building guide for Dungeons and Dragons or Pathfinder?

Sadly I see this often.

People who never read a novel before, but have played a lot of DnD, build huge massive worlds, than bitch and moan that they have lots of ideas but can't make anything form a novel.

Try reading an actual novel. 

If you want to see an example of a series well written: try reading Harry Potter. 8 novels. A well built world. But the story follows the life of one character. Each novel spans the space of 1 year. The series follows 8 years of his life.

Read that. All 8 novels.

Than you'll see what I mean.

Volume 1 should NOT be about introducing your world. Readers don't care about your world. Readers care about your characters.

>>>I've been writing another story in the same universe, shorter than my main idea for the world but still much larger than my existing novel and it just seems so hard to juggle 10s of characters because I want each to feel fulfilling in every aspect. And also, what if I write something weird or wrong now, and ruin the foreshadowing/logic of things to come later. I want it all to make sense and the more the ideas keep growing, especially as I have characters I want to continue in different books so I don't want to lose a feeling of continuity...

Again, it feels like you have no clue how novels work.

You should NOT have 10s of characters.

You need ONE main character (often a hero, but doesn't have to be), one character who acts as a foil (often a villain, but doesn't have to be), a 2 or 3 other characters for them to interact with. Five characters tops. They can meet background or crowd characters, but those should never have more than 2 or 3 pages at the most.

If you have a lot of characters and you want to show case each of them, perhaps you could try doing what I did. It worked for me and it might work for you.

I started The Twighlight Manor series in 1978. It started out as a random one-off story that I wrote in a single day. There was no plan on publishing it, no plan on more stories. Nothing. I was a child. I knew nothing of publishing. An adult in my life, read it and sent it in to some contest, and it won and got published and gained fans who asked for more. So I wrote another story about the house, and a different character living in it.

As time went by I developed a massive database in 3 ring binders of 755 characters, all for 10+ pages each of character sheets, history, etc.

The house stood for 500 years and these characters were the people who had lived in it over that time. And I wanted to write a story about each character. And I did. But not novels. The result was 2,431 short stories, most 12 to 50 pages long, each set in the manor house, but each about a different character.

The main character, the one who built the house and later haunted it, was Quaraun, the main character of the 138 novels, which became known as The Quaraun series, while the 2,431 short stories were known as The Twighlight Manor series, and each featured a different main character from a different time period, but always set in the same manor house.

My suggestion to you is to write the novels of your series about the main character ONLY, and than, take each of your 10s of other characters and write a separate short story for each one. That way you can write about all of them, without them being in a jumble. Each gets to stand out in their own story, while the main character can move on n the novels.

>>>But then again, even published and professional books and shows make these kinda mistakes and I'm probably overthinking it. But I just want that passion for writing back where life and the ropes of recognition didn't bind me. I'm not sure how to find that again.

Not everything has to be a novel.

From everything you are saying, it sounds like your series is better suited to being lots and lots and lots of short stories.

It sounds like you have lots of plots and lots of characters and are trying to force them to fit in a novel and are getting burned out and overwhelmed because they just don't all fit together.

It sounds like you have the makings of a large series of short stories, not the makings of a 10 volume set of novels.

I would suggest you rethink formatting, and try writing lots of short stories instead of a few novels and see if tat doesn't work out better for you.

You sound like you love your world but are frustrated with there being too much to fit in one story.

>>>I've talked about this a lot. With myself and others. But it's been months of not writing and I tell myself I want to write everyday but then I either I procrastinate or life gets in the way... Like I shouldn't even be writing this post.

Perhaps you just need a break.

Nothing wrong with that.

Writing is a lot of mental energy. It wears you down. And it stresses you out, because you feel every emotion your characters feel.

Writing is very draining.

And writing every day is quite bad advice.

Federal laws do not allow employees to let workers work more than 5 days a week for a reason. The law REQUIRES you to take off 2 days a week to rest.

You'll burn out and be no good at your job if you over work yourself, that's why you get weekends off and are given vacation time.

Writing is the same way.

Treat writing like a job.

Take lunch breaks, only do it for 4 hours a day.

Take weekends off.

Take summer vacations.

Writing every day causes burn out.

And what you are describing is burn out.

Don't be afraid to take a weekend off, or a week, or a month, or even a whole year.

There's nothing wrong with that.

Think of your health first.

>>>I just wonder how I had the discipline to work on my craft before, and now I feel burnt out for months.

I received this email May 11, 2021.

Months of no writing means that you got stressed out by 2020.

Perfectly understandable.

Every one did.

Life went to shit for the entire planet.

2020 was hell. Take a year off. Rest. Relax. You probably need it. Everyone else certainly does.

Worry about getting back into writing later. Just rest now. The desire to write will return. You'll see.

>>>So much that it irks me, not that I'm in that situation, but more so that that's just how things work. Which is very normal, but it does make me question why people like simpler prose, when a lot of depth in writing actually comes from an author's way of words.

Uhm...what?

Okay this is where your email starts to swirl down the toilet drain.

The drink or drugs seemed to have kicked in at this point and went total illiteracy from here on out.

>>>For me, I would normally opt a visual story over a book just because how simple a book is. So usually, it's the way something is written which draws me in. I can see the effort put into the words. And that shows quality over quantity.

Ah! Yes. You mean you read comic books and not novels.

That was pretty obvious straight from the beginning.

>>>Nothing is stopping me. 

You are correct. Nothing is stopping you. So WHY are you writing this to me? Why do you just work on your series.

You do realize that all this time you wasted writing this email, could have been spent working on your series.

>>>I was just having a thought at how critical some on social media can take a comment/post and judge someone's whole life or career over it. Just a thought.

Uhm... what?

You changed topics again.

But yes, I agree. Social media is very critical. More so since the mass influx of millions of school bullies took to the internet in 2020 when schools shut down and they found themselves with no one to bully, so they rushed to the internet and now massive hoards of toxic cyberbullies bully everyone on social media.

You sound very immature.

The fact that you were unaware that social media will judge someone's whole life or career over a single comment, tells me that you've never been on the internet until recently.

I've been online since 1996

I stopped reading social media posts and comments in 2010, when the SARS Virus shut down half the planet and trolls took the internet by storm.

Since 2010 social media has been making a mass downward spiral into trolldom. But in 2020 when the SARS virus mutated into Covid-19 and 10 years of government doing nothing about SARS caused the mass world shut down of 2020, we saw the largest influx of trolls the internet has ever seen.

You are very young if you didn't know about the 2010 troll attack. You are even younger if you only joined social media in 2020.

First impressions are important.

How you represent yourself determines how people view you. And I got to say, my first impression of you is not very good.

Your email tells me that you are a lazy ass drunk.

Drunks are nothing but gutter scum piece of trash.

Soooo... my first impression of you is that, you are a lazy ass gutter scum piece of trash.

The massive amount of grammar errors, the childish whining, and the inability to finish a complete thought from one sentence to the next, tells me you are immature, illiterate, and suffer from several very serious mental disorders that are not being properly medicated.

Much of what you say implies you are a wealthy, pampered, spoiled brat who grew up with a silver spoon shoved up your ass and have never had anyone say no to you before.

And yet, I don't know you.

Outside of this one email I know nothing about you.

You may not be a drunk, lazy ass gutter scum piece of trash.

You may not be an illiterate, spoiled, rich brat.

But guess what?

There is NOTHING in you email that says you are NOT a drunk, lazy ass gutter scum piece of trash.

There is NOTHING in you email that says you are NOT an illiterate, spoiled, rich brat.

In fact EVERYTHING about this email SCREAMS that you ARE an illiterate, spoiled, drunk, lazy ass gutter scum piece of trash rich brat.

And if you did not want me to think that about you, than maybe you should have done a better job at editing your own writing and ensuring that you used correct and proper grammar, ensuring that you didn't ramble mindless drivel like the town drunk, ensuring that you presented yourself in a professional manner.

>>>I was just having a thought at how critical some on social media can take a comment/post and judge someone's whole life or career over it. Just a thought.

If your social media comments and posts are the drunk laced, illiterate, mindless drivel you spewed out in this email, well than, I can see why people are judging you.

It is so painfully obvious that you have no education, no manners, no etiquette, and no level of any ability to present yourself in a professional manor on any level what so ever.

Yes, people on social media will judge you harshly. They do this to every one. But the fact remains, if your social media posts are anything like this email, well, you are doing a damned good job at feeding the trolls and giving them reasons to judge you. You are making it worse for yourself.


>>>But people who don't understand this... I just don't understand what's so hard about it.

You put this after your complaint about social media. Which in correct, literate, proper grammar, means you are still talking about social media.

However, given you mish-mash, broken grammar and utterly illiterate style of writing, it appears that you are back to talking about your manuscript again? I think this because the next thing you say is...

>>>It's not that everyone doubts or misunderstands my work, but some do.

So what?

Some one criticized your work.

So what?

Get over it.

You sound like Kendra Silvermander.

She writes her emails n this same weird, rambling, nonsensical, illiterate mish mash.

Do you remember Kendra Silvermander?

If you are emailing me, you SHOULD.

There once was an author jealous of my “success”. Success in this situation being that my novel had been published. Self-published. It sold only 12 copies in over a year. So no “success” here. Especially not given that she was calling me a “millionaire” because of it. Turns out we had been in the same writing group in college a few years earlier apparently, I don’t know, I don’t remember her there. There were only 5 people, all of them at least 40 years younger than her, so… yeah. But she claims she was. I published 4 novels in each of the years since, 12 total, and she had not yet published anything and was resentful because of that, even though there was hardly any sales to be jealous of. She created 52 Amazon accounts so she could leave 52 one star reviews on the book. Than in the comments under each of the 52 one star reviews, she had a huge conversation with each of her 52 accounts.

I didn’t know about it until one of my friends on Facebook sent me a message asking if I had seen the wild 1 star review spam that was plastering one of my books. They knew I never read reviews on my books, so they realized I had not seen it.

It was a fascinating popcorn worthy read, with the following line, being copy and pasted over 500 times:

“A retarded story, about a retarded character, written by a retarded author.”

Every post ended with:

“I’m Kendra Silvermander! It’s my turn to shine! You won’t step on my toes no more!”

I was somewhere into the thousandth comment when abruptly they all vanished.

I was rather disappointed that they had been deleted. It was some of the funniest shit I’ve ever read. I wish Amazon had not deleted them. Even though they were 1 star neg reviews, they were utterly hilarious to read. It was painfully obvious they were written by a jealous author who was just trying to make me and books look bad, but ended up making herself look bad.

A few hours later Amazon sent me an email explaining that a self-published author had made 52 fake accounts to spam my books with 1 star reviews. They banned her from making new accounts, deleted her author account so she couldn’t publish with Kindle, and deleted the reviews.

That’s how she and all of her 52 accounts got banned by Amazon. Kendra Silvermander’s not allowed to publish books on Amazon now because of this. Something I found out more about afterward, because she started sending me dozens of emails a day, enraged that I had gotten her banned from Amazon. She thought I had reported her reviews, but I had not. I don’t think anyone reported them at all. I think Amazon’s algorithm noticed all 52 accounts had the same ispn. I had to get a restraining order because she started showing up at my house and sending death threats. Total psycho, so it made sense later why she thought nothing of creating 52 accounts to spam neg reviews with.

It was the only time I’ve ever read any review on any of my books, so I don’t know if I’ve ever had others removed or not.

My thought is this:

Reviews are there to help readers decide what to buy. You are the author, you don’t need to buy your own book, you already wrote it, so you have no business bothering to read reviews. Reviews are NOT there for you! No reputable book reviewer writes a review expecting the author to read it. Book reviews are intended to help readers decide if the book is something they might like. The only people who write reviews expecting the author to read it, are small minded self published authors who think reviews are an excuse to hurt the competition. Authors like that never last long. You want READERS not authors reviewing your work. ALL book reviews written by authors are pointless and should never be read. All all reviews written by readers are meant to be read by other readers, not the author, so no need to read those either.

In the end, I've never read any reviews before or since and I've published 138 novels (and mean NOVEL not current lazy trend of calling 50k word short stories a novel - I published 138 novels that are 200k word novels - and over 2,000 short stories - using the ORIGINAL 1830s definition of a short story: works under 75k words - not the 1,000 word flash people call shorts these days. People often ask how I'm able to publish so much, and I'm quick to tell them, I spend my time writing not worrying about what other people think of my work. Writers who spend all their time obsessing over reviews quit writing after the neg reviews start rolling in. Others refuse to write their next book until they receive a good review to motivate them first. Me? I don't read reviews at all and can just write, publish, write, publish, write, publish, instead or read, worry, read, worry, read, worry, read, worry.

So if other reviews were deleted, I have no way of knowing, because I don't even know how many reviews I have to begin with. I find it utterly pointless to waste time reading reviews, worrying about reviews, and fussing over reviews. I don't need others to tell me if my writing is good or not. Some will like it. Some will not. That's the way this career is. No reason to waste time worrying about what others think. I like what I write, I'm excited to write the next one, that's all that matters. I think far too many writers these days spend far too much time worrying about things that don't matter - like reviews. What did we authors do before 1994? Amazon didn't exist back than, and we had no reviews to worry about. Of course it was a lot harder to self publish back than too, but we did. I published my first novel in 1978. I've seen the industry change a lot n the past 5 decades. Fussing about review rose up in 2010 and I've seen it destroy the careers of many who simply gave up writing after reading a bad review. It's a dog eat dog career and if one bad review will stop you from writing, you shouldn't be writing.

I wish more writers today would spend time worrying about issues that mattered: like the shitty ass lack of grammar skills that is a plague the past 5 years, instead of focusing on things that don't matter, like reviews.

It appears to me, that you have never received a manuscript rejection before.

And your story has never been criticized before.

And like Kendra Silvermander, you are having a teddy bear meltdown because you don't know how to deal with anything rationally.

Here's a tip: GROW UP!

>>>Which makes this process quite weird and way more subjective than something similar in a visual medium.

You are aware that actual, real, professional writers, spend their time writing, right?

We who are multi published authors with dozens of published novels, don't have time to obsessively worry and fuss over what people think of our work, because we are too busy writing the next novel.

>>>But if you do something even remotely off the path in fiction writing, oh my look at you, you don't even know English grammar.

Uhm... if this email is any example of your work, than, you, what they are saying is true... YOU DON'T KNOW ENGLISH GRAMMAR!

It has nothing to do with fiction at all.

It has everything to do with putting nouns and verb in their proper places.

If you had said English was not your native tongue, I'd be more understanding of your plight. But honey, you are waving the you have good grammar flag very high and, you don't have good grammar, not even close, and I've seen hundreds of ESL students who gained a better grasp on grammar in 2 months, than you have after a lifetime of it as your native language.

>>>But the same logic can be applied to simple styles with no defining identity.

Style, is poet e.e.cummings never using a capital letter in protest, for the sake of making a point and trying to make a stand against school not allowing black students to learn to read.

Illiterate is not knowing how to use conjunctions, adverbs, prepositions, diphthongs, or or adjectives.

Style is Ernest Hemingway, never putting a "said" tag or a name after any line of dialogue, but making each character's dialogue so distinctive that you know who is talking and what emotion they are using without the use of names or said tags.

Illiterate is not knowing how to use periods, sentences, paragraphs, or comas.

Style is Lewis Carrol's Jabberwock poem, printed in reverse so you have to read it by holding the book to a mirror, and the phrases being lined up to form the shape of a dragon when centered on the printed page.

Illiterate is throwing mindless drivel on the page and calling it art.

>>>I won't be naming anyone, obviously, but they exist for sure. And it really makes me question how some authors are published.

Uhm... Who? What?

What are you even talking about?

Is this line even connected to anything else you wrote?

How drunk are you right now?

You seem to be referring to a thought which you thought in your head and forgot to type in the email.

Who exists?

What is making you question how some authors get published?

What the hell kind of illiterate crap are you writing here?

Are you really this illiterate or are you going out of you way to TRY to write as illiterate as possible to prove a point to whomever it was that called you illiterate?

And if that's what you are doing, why did you send the email to me and not to them?

They won't get your point if you don't send your email to the correct person.

Perhaps you should spend less time drinking and more time paying attention to what you type and who you send it to?

Had you paid attention to me, you'd have known hat I publish the emails I receive when I answer them. You'd also know that I never answer an email privately, and if you want an answer from me, that answer will be posted here on my website.

I wonder hw many people will read this before you realize you sent your email to me by mistake?

>>>Essentially, that "good" is subjective.

Uhm... again... what?

What "good" are you referring to?

Again, you seem to be referring to a thought which you thought in your head and forgot to type in the email.

Are you suggesting that good is subjective in connection to grammar skills?

No.

No. You either know how to use grammar correctly or you do not.

The story, the plot, the characters, yes that is all subjective, but being too lazy to use grammar isn't subjective, it's just you being lazy.

>>>And also that people are way more picky about petty stuff when it comes to writing compared to other art.

Again, you are rambling about grammar and illiteracy why comparing writing to art.

Yes, creating worlds, bringing life to characters, sending them off on adventures, or even writing male ego female hating speculative art fiction like The Brass Door, is subjective of being good only in the eye of the beholder.

But even wild, crazed, manic male ego glorifying, unabashed woman hating art pieces like The Brass Door or psychedelic pointlessness of The Unicorn in the Garden, even as none standard art pieces of extremes, they still both used correct and proper grammar to bring fort their very art piece stories.

Your use of grammar throughout this email is none standard and a bit confusing, so I’m having difficulty understanding what exactly you are trying to convey, and this definitely could be contributing to the bad reviews.

People who read, tend to be college graduates and have a full working knowledge of advantaged college level English grammar and are not going to be very forgiven of an author who is too incompetent to at least try to use correct grammar.

If your grammar is this messed up in just a simple emailed question, I’d hate to see how messed up it is in your books.

Know-nothing teens who can’t tell a comma from a period will not notice the lack of good grammar and will gush love for your story, but adults will struggle to get past a single page if your grammar is bad.

You should definitely consider taking some remedial Adult Ed classes in English Grammar, or even consider getting a degree in English Literature, Creative Writing, Journalism, Grammar, Teaching High School Literature, or something similar.

Gaining a good working grasp on the English language is a REQUIREMENT to have a successful writing career.

Sure you can sell a few books here and a few books there without any education at all, but if you have your heart set on successful sales and a high rate of good reviews, which is what you’ve said you want, than you MUST have the best, most pristine use of grammar possible. You NEED to get at LEAST an Associates Degree in English Literature, Creative Writing, Journalism, Grammar, Teaching High School Literature, or something similar.

The better the degree, the better your ability to write on a “successful” level.

Remember the more you study and practice your art, the better you will get at it.


* An Associates Degree is 2 years of studying English grammar.

* A Bachelors Degree is 4 years of studying English grammar.

* A Masters Degree is 8 years of studying English grammar.

* A PhD is 12 years of studying English grammar.


Think about it.

A 10 year old boy can play football and be the best on his team, but he won’t win the Super Bowl until he goes to college and trains for years and years and years and years and just keeps practising and practising and improving.

Now sure, he COULD train on his own and be the best football player in his town, but, without a coach he won’t see his own flaws and he’ll keep making those same mistakes over and over.

Sure all that practice in the back yard has made him good, but it has also made him blind to seeing his flaws as well.

When he goes to college and trains with others, he has his coach and team mates there to point out his errors and help him fix those mistakes so that he STOPS MAKING ERRORS and starts to play the CORRECTLY in the PROPER manner.

Once he sees his errors and follows his coach’s instructions to fix them, he becomes even better at his craft, and starts winning the big college games, and soon he’s playing in the pros, and before long he’s playing at the Super Bowl.

But he never would have made it to the Super Bowl if he continued practising on his own in the back yard.

Writing and publishing is just like football.

Sure you can do it on your own, self publish, do your own editing, make your own covers.

Nothing wrong with that. Lots of writers do it. I do it myself. It’s great. It’s fun. BUT... if you want to be “successful” you need to train.

Yes, practice makes perfect, but if you practice by yourself, you won’t ever see your own flaws and you’ll just keep practising the same mistakes and instead of becoming a better writer, you’ll just become very good at repeating the same mistakes you always made.

In order to become a big time successful writer, you NEED to go to college and train with others. Have a writing coach (professor) who can see your flaws, point them out to you, and show you how to fix them.

And when you learn to write clean copy in pristine perfect correct and proper grammar, you’ll suddenly see yourself go from selling 100 copies a month to 1,000 copies a day, and instead of receiving mostly bad reviews, you’ll start receiving mostly good reviews.


>>>I mean I had an editor at Tor read it and I think he read it cuz he liked it. But then he gave me some points. But now I thinking and thought of how to integrate those points but I also don't want to lose my own vision... But it's Tor too...

And there it is.

Finally we get to the point of all this raving and ranting.

You were rejected by TOR.

I notice that your grammar is so bad, so poor, so illiterate, that you can't even be bothered to spell TOR correctly.

Gee... I wonder why a TOR editor called you illiterate?

>>>It scares me even more because he didn't talk about publishing but he did read it and his response was professional. He only gave me one vague line that he liked it but that seemed the most appropriate way to go about feedback. I doubt he would have requested full MS if he didn't like what he read.

His response was professional ... unlike this illiterate email you have sent me, bitching about how you've been accused of being illiterate.

If he told you your grammar was illiterate, WHY do you think he would talk about publishing?

He told you to improve your writing.

So, here's an idea... why don't you take his advice and improve your writing?

Sending drunk crazed illiterate emails to random authors online isn't going to improve your writing. It really isn't.

>>>Firstly, never once did I say I was better. I don't know how that came to be. I just noticed some errors and style differences. I've noticed errors in writing I enjoyed. I've had experienced readers say to me, who enjoy Sanderson, that his prose isn't strong. No one is perfect, and popularity doesn't indicate quality. It's so easy to throw out a famous name as an example of prestige when there are many factors that go into it.

Uhm... what?

Can you stop changing topics from one sentence to the next?

Good god!

What the hell is wrong with you?

Did you even make an attempt to READ what you write before you clicked the send email button?

Are you saying that the TOR (not Tor) editor said you said you were better than him?

And what do you mean you noticed errors and style differences?

Are you saying you actually wrote to a TOR editor about a book he edited to tell him he missed some errors?

OMG! How the fuck arrogant are you?

Who died and made you god?

Also, who is Sanderson? Never heard of him.

>>>No one is perfect, and popularity doesn't indicate quality. 

True.

True.

Very true.

But who cares?

What does it matter to you?

Again, you are sounding like Kendra Silvermander here. A legendary, now very famous unpublished author, famous for her jealous rampages and screaming mindless illiteracy, sending emails not unlike this one, arriving at author homes wielding golf clubs, all because she saw an author self-publish 4 novels in 1 year, and she couldn't stop writing hate filled emails to finish her novel and get it published, so she had a jealous crazed meltdown, built a bomb, and murdered an entire family. For what? She could have spent that time finishing a novel. Now she's spending time in prison.

How much like Kendra Silvermander are you?

Will YOU be in prison soon too, because you also could not mind your own business?

Think how much you could get written of your series if you was not being a stupid ass nosey bastard.

Think how much work you could get done if you weren't drinking and writing these emails?

Think how much work you could have done, in the time you spent emailing a TOR editor telling him he couldn't edit a novel good enough.

You are a busy body who spends too much time worrying about what others are doing.

Why don't you try minding your own business and stop sticking your arrogant know it all nose in places it don't belong? Did you ever think of that?

>>>Secondly, I understand. It's easier to work on first drafts or guide others, but I can't see my work from fesh eyes and so I was just wondering how others self edit their work.

Are you asking me for advice?

Is there finally a point to this email and why I received it from you?

My editing process is already posted online. Go read it.

You didn't have to send me this crazy ass email to get that advice. It's already available online.

>>>A lot of the times I think my work just sucks so it's a very weird situstion for me to be in. I'm just trying to understand my own writing because I've had people say my work is good, in fact if I'm being honest, it's all I ever hear which raises even more questions but I don't think they're saying it to be nice at all because of the context of are talks.

Is this the good is subjective part you were talking about earlier?

A lot of people are going to say your work is good, just because they either don't want to hurt your feelings or because they don't want to admit they never read it at all.

In the end, it never matters if someone thinks your work good or bad. All that matters is that YOU enjoy reading your work.

Yes.

Read what you wrote.

Far too often I see unpublished writers complaining online that they can't read what they wrote, citing that their writing is "too cringe to read".

Uhm...

If the author loves the character, the reader will love him too.

If the author cried during the scene, the reader will cry too.

If the author can't read it because it's too cringy, the reader won't be able to read it either, and THAT is why so many remain unpublished.

If you can't bare to read your own work, how the hell do you expect the reader to want to read it?

Did you know that The Night of the Screaming Unicorn is one of my all time favourite novels, to the point that I reread it at least once or twice a month. I love reading and rereading that novel. Yes. I wrote that novel. And I not only enjoyed writing it, but I also fully enjoy reading it.

BoomFuzzy is another novel that I read and reread over and over because I love it so much. And yes, I wrote that novel too.

If you try to please everyone, you’ll end up pleasing no one.

You simply can not please every one, so you might as well please yourself.

Write what you are most passionate about, the story you have the most desire and drive to write. And when you are finished with that story, move on to writing the next story which fills your heart with the burning desire to write it.

This is what I believe in. And it is more than what I preach, it is also what I practice.

So with this in mind, you can see that I do not feel there is such a thing as writing the “wrong” story.

I believe that whatever story your heart desires to write, that is the best story for you to write at that moment.

>>>I know what I do, but sometimes it's easy to lose track of it or get lost in the work. I just came here for suggestions and perspectives, not to be told how the industry by a certain someone who thinks they know better when I've been in contact with professionals before...

Again, all of this just reads like a whinny, spoilt brat, who never had any one say no to them before.

So a TOR editor rejected you. So what?

It's not his job to give you suggestions or perspectives.

And yes, an editor at a publishing house DOES know better than you.

So you've been in contact with professionals. Well, whoop-dee-do. So the hell what.

Contacting a professional is a hell of a lot different than being a professional.

And you my friend are proving many times over that you have no level of professionalism in you at all.

Newsflash: professionals don't write emails like this.

You will NOT become a better writer by emailing editors and authors raving and ranting because an editor at TOR called you illiterate.

In fact, this email, will likely kill your chances of not only NEVER being published by TOR, but will also blacklist you from being published by ANY big house publisher.

You do know editors work at multiple publishing houses, using pennames, the same way authors do, right?

And you are also aware that the publishing industry is a rather small industry where every one knows every one and so you email one, they'll forward your email to all the rest.

And you do know I'm the editor in chief of 2 literary magazines and am friends with lots of editors at lots of big and small publishing houses so, it isn't going to be difficult for me to figure out which TOR editor you are raving about.

Did you think about any of that before writing this email?

No?

Perhaps you should have.

Because guess what? No one likes back stabbing bastards like you and no one is going to want to work with you, now that you've been dragging TOR's name through the mud.

TOR has their reputation to think about and writers like you are high risk.

Every publisher has their reputation to think about.

No publisher will work with writers like you who run around bad mouthing the editor who rejected you.

You have a brain, maybe you should try using it.

Brains are dreadfully useful items ad they are required for anyone seeking to become a better writer.

Tell me this: WHICH writing skills did you develop while writing this email?

>>>A) I do doubt my work, regardless. B) Even after feedback, it makes me doubt my work more. I just don't under why an editor at Tor would read my work for no reason at all. It's left me very confused. As he's been nice to me and I want to send it again, but I'm so unsure about it now. C) Yes. I've lost interest in this work currently. But I do like writing as a whole. But this whole industry seeking thing has made it hard. It was so much easier to write before I tried seeking publishing.

Oh boo-hoo. Give up writing than. Clearly you don't have the balls for this career, if one rejection causes you to want to give up.

I’ve never been inspired by bowing to the will of others.

And what MOST people classify as success, I classify as you being castrated, stripped of your balls and your dignity, forced to grovel in hopes of favor from another.

What are you?

A man?

Or a dog?

I find myself utterly disgusted by what most people think of as motivation to write, and by what you clearly see as motivation to write.

Why do you need the approval of others to move forward?

Because you have no self worth.

You lack confidence in yourself so you rely on others to pat you on the back.

Is that REALLY success?

To me, that’s nothing but failure on the truest and purest of levels.

You fail at existing, because you can not exist on your own.

You need a crutch.

You need someone to lead you along and show you the way.

You are too much of a weak willed pussy to be able to stand up on your own two feet. And because of this, I see you as a failure.

You are a failure.

You are a failure because you are incapable of making your own decisions.

You are a failure because you are incapable of making your own choices.

You are a failure because you can only move forward if others pander to your selfish ego.

You are a failure because you are willing to give up when not enough people like you.

I'm not here to teach you writing skills. That's your college professor's job.

I'll tell you how I got to where I am, and you can decide if that path is right for you too or not.

My advice?

Give up writing.

This career is not for you.

You’ll NEVER succeed, because there will always be haters. There will always be rejections. There will always be negative 1 star reviews. There will always be critics.

You pick yourself up and you move forward or you give up and rot in the gutter. It's your choice.

You can’t please everyone, and if you don’t even have the ability to please yourself, than give up now, because there is no point in you even trying to go forward.

You don’t have the mental strength, the emotional stamina, or the self worth for this business.

Millions dip their toes into the writing career, but rare is the person with the mental and emotional strength to succeed.

You MUST be able to stand on your own to succeed in this career.

You MUST be able to write what YOU want to write, without bending to the whims and wills of the market.

If you change what you write every time you get a bad review, you are doomed to fail before you even get started.

I want you to succeed, but I’m not sure you can. Just go back and re-read your question. Read it carefully. Perhaps you will than understand why I can not see any publishing success in your future.

If you are to succeed at this, or anything else in life, you NEED to change your attitude.

You NEED to have a strong self worth.

I can’t help you with that.

No one can.

That’s something you have to build up on your own.

And I say this because of your next part...

>>>I've studied Psychology. I don't need your feedback when you know nothing about me.

Thank you.

Psychology is a REQUIRMENT for entry into EVERY college. You MUST take it your first semester no matter what degree, no matter what college, so, you ain't saying anything special here.

Psychology is a sub-par, standard course.

Try getting a Master's Degree in Forensic Psychology/Abnormal Psychology of the Criminal Mind, than come back when you are educated enough in Psychology to talk to me on my level of Psychology education.

Are you aware I am qualified to open a practice and treat patients?

Are you?

Did you know I'm qualified to work as an FBI Forensic Psychologist?

Are you?

I write about a serial killer. My main character Quaraun, is the villain of the series, but it's told from his perspective, so he's also the protagonist. I got a degree in Forensic Psychology/Abnormal Psychology of the Criminal Mind not to get a job with the FBI, which is the ONLY job you can get with that degree, but rather, I got it to study, real world research, into real world serial killers and how they think, so that I could wrote Quaraun more accurately.

How many people do you know who would devote 8 years of college study, just to write a more accurate fictional character?

Are you willing to do that?

I think not.

You aren't even willing to improve your grammar skills.

But all of this means nothing.

What I've studied, what classes/courses I've taken, what degrees I have, all of that is irrelevant to you and your email.

And can you see why I pointed it out?

I point out what I've studied, what classes/courses I've taken, what degrees I have, so show you EXACTLY how irrelevant it is to this conversation, and show you how utterly irrelevant it was for YOU to say:

>>>I've studied Psychology. I don't need your feedback when you know nothing about me.

Thank you.

Why did you say this?

You just spouted it out at random.

>>>I've studied Psychology. I don't need your feedback when you know nothing about me.

Thank you.

It seems so utterly pointless.

You're right. 

You don't need my feedback, so why than did you email me?

You are also correct in that I know nothing about you... outside of what you said in this email.

I've never heard of you before.

Why are you emailing me?

And this line, it looks like a reply.

What are you replying too?

Again, it looks like you were too drunk to know what you were writing and also too drunk to send this email to the correct person.

I feel like you were sending this email to someone else, someone you were already talking to.

But since you said it, let's address it.

>>>I've studied Psychology. I don't need your feedback when you know nothing about me.

Thank you.

Okay. So how does this help you become a better writer?

You can study something, sure, but unless you apply it to your every day life, your studies are for naught. 

I know a guy who has over 200 college degrees. Yes, 200+ college degrees. He lives in an oil barrel. No, not a big one. It's barely big enough for him to crawl into.

He has active TB and is highly contagious. He's infected dozens of college students. He doesn't have a job. He started going to college to dodge the draft during the Vietnam War, and never stopped.

He's 83 years old now in 2021. He has spent more than 60 years of his life, endlessly in college, out of fear of more drafts, and he lives 100% off of financial aid, study grants, and scholarships.

ALL of his degrees are in liberal studies and psychology, mostly focused on religion.

You'd think someone with so many degrees, he'd be pretty smart.

But he believes god is an alien living on Kolob, and he thinks the American president is a shape shifting reptilian. He can barely string a full sentence together when he talks, and he talks like a wild crazed madman. You'd never suspect him of having any degrees let alone more than 200, including more than 30 PhDs.

But... chances are high you know him, you've seen him, the whole world saw him January 6, 2021 when he was one of the people livestreaming himself breaking into the capital and smashing up things inside.

My uncle David is living proof, that studying something does not make one smart.

You CAN have hundreds of degrees and dozens of PhDs and still be illiterate, still be a deranged conspiracy theorist, still be a criminal, still be a child abuser, still be a spouse beater, still be an animal abuser, still be Colorado's most wanted for shooting 14 police officers, and still be wanted by the FBI. My uncle David is ALL of the above.

Education is good.

But education can also be pointless.

And in this case, I feel education is pointless.

What have you done with you Psychology studies?

Clearly you've never written any Psychology essays to be published in peer based Psychology Journals, that can be seen by you not knowing eve the most basic of grammar skills.

So, what EXACTLY was your Psychology studies?

You seem to be using Psychology studies as though you think it's a threat... but saying such only makes you look silly, and further makes you look even MORE illiterate than you were already looking.

Me, I have used my Psychology studies to improve my writing. But you, how exactly does saying you've studies Psychology improve your writing skills.

>>>I've studied Psychology. I don't need your feedback when you know nothing about me.

Thank you.

A common mistake beginner writers make and one you are making a lot of in this email, is writing overly complex sentences in an attempt to sound more authoritative. Just stop trying to sound authoritative. Be yourself. Waving your Psychology studies around like a threat just makes you look like an idiot. It doesn't give you any sense of authority. It just proves that you are scared of psychiatrists and using your own fear to try to scare others. You fear doctors looking into your mind, so you are trying to scare your critics by using your fears against them.

Newsflash, intelligent people aren't scared of psychiatrists. Actual studies in actual Psychology journals have proven that fear of psychiatrists exists almost exclusively among the uneducated, poor, and welfare bums... the same groups prone to conspiracy theories and believing in aliens or demons.

People who ACTUALLY KNOW Psychology studies, also know that only uneducated welfare bums who devote their lives to conspiracy theories, use things like "I studied Psychology" as a threat.

Sorry, but by saying this, you've made yourself look EVEN MORE ILLITERATE and EVEN MORE UNEDUCATED, than had already looked BEFORE you said this.

You ain't winning any prizes for making yourself look educated.

>>>And yes, just send me a chat message and we can do something about the sample. I think I need to have confidence in myself, but I by no means think I'm better than everyone, especially when art is subjective.

Sample?

What sample?

Did you send a sample of your work to someone and they gave you feedback and this answer is you responding to them but you sent it to the wrong person?

You act like you think I've read your manuscript, but, you never sent one to me.

And if you had, I would have burned it.

I'm NOT a manuscript reading service.

And not writer worth publishing uses a manuscript reading service either. Nor do they use beta readers or alpha readers.

Beta readers, alpha readers, book reviewers, and manuscript reading services exist for one reason and one reason only: to scam authors out of their money.

The ONLY people who advice writers to use beta readers, alpha readers, book reviewers, and manuscript reading services are the beta readers, alpha readers, book reviewers, and manuscript reading services THEMSELVES.

Every article, every blog post, every forum post, everything that tells a writer they MUST have a  beta readers, alpha readers, book reviewers, and manuscript reading services is written by  beta readers, alpha readers, book reviewers, and manuscript reading services trying to convince authors they need these things when they don't.

Beta readers, alpha readers, book reviewers, and manuscript reading services WILL NOT help you get published, nor will they help you develop better writing skills.

If you REALLY want to develop better writing skills, you don't ask some know nothing teenaged brat on FIVVER to beta read your manuscript. Do you REALLY think they know grammar or good writing, when they are barely old enough to be out of diapers?

Grow up and stop falling for scams. 

If you REALLY want to develop better writing skills, you do what professional do: you go to college and you get a degree in English Grammar.

You can run you ass around online, getting thousands of kids to read your work, but all they will do it fan or ego or dish out hate. They will not help you become a better writer, They will not help you improve your grammar. They will not help you get published.

The only thing they do is get paid by you to read your book for free, and that is their motive.

They don't care about helping you.

No.

They just want to get paid to read books for free.

They don't want to be bothered with paying $10 to buy a book, when they can charge stupid, brain dead, desperate wannabe authors $50 to to send them a free copy.

Use your brain.

In the publishing industry, if someone is charging you, chances are high they are scamming you.

Money goes TO the author, not away from the author.

And chat message?

Do you even have any clue who you have sent this email too?

I don't chat with anyone on any platform. Especially not strangers like you.

Art is subjective, yes. Grammar is not.

>>>I don't have to prove anything to anyone. But some part of me is glad you did it, now I know. I think it's better to just stop asking social media...


No, you don't have to prove yourself to anyone. This is true.

But I didn't ask you to prove anything, nor would I. It's not in my nature to talk that way. This email is unsolicited. You are a random stranger who sent it to me out of the blue. And you act like I asked you to send it.

I find myself very confused by your email in general and lines like this in particular.

Asking someone to prove something is a childish, immature thing to do. Adults don't do that. Cry babies do that.

Asking someone to prove something, is you very simply accusing that person of lying.

In my experience, the only people who say "so prove it" are people who are themselves chronic liars and are incapable of believing anything any one says because nothing they themselves say is true.

I also live in Maine, a region that punishes lies by cutting out tongues.

No one in their right mind would dare tell a lie around here. And therefore, you never hear any one here ask someone else to prove anything.

It sounds like you were talking to an American.

Americans have a culture of endless lies, to the point that they constantly say "And I ain't lying" or "Honestly" or "Not gonna lie" every time they tell the truth. Telling the truth is such a rare phenomena in America, that they never believe anything, because they know they can't trust an American to tell the truth.

I'm not an American so stop talking to me like I'm one of the degraded, lying ass pieces of shit.

But, what is it you are glad I did?

Again, you aren't making any sense and you sound drunk, and again, I think you've sent this email to the wrong person.

>>>And the thing about people's point is that people would form a judgement before reading the work, then one after reading the work, then another after reading my other styles. The outcomes is usually positive.

Yet again you have jumped topics.

Please stop thinking half of your thoughts in your head and only writing the next half down. It's impossible to understand what you are talking about when you don't say everything you are thinking.

>>>How easy it is for people to flip flop and assume things when they have almost no context (and the downvotes I get, just for expressing my views, show that).

Downvotes? 

Did you make a YouTube video and it got more dislikes than likes? What are you talking about?

I can see why that editor called you illiterate.

Damn!

And speaking of flip flopping... what exactly do you call what you are doing in this email?

You say you want to develop better writing skills, but than you flip flop back and forth between saying you are the best and saying you never said that, right after you say that.

You say you want to develop better writing skills, but than you flip flop back and forth between saying you are not illiterate while writing in the most amount of illiteracy you can muster.

You say you want to develop better writing skills, but than you flip flop back and forth between saying your story is art and doesn't need changing, to saying you want advice on how to change it.

You talk about flip flopping, but YOU are the one doing the flip flopping.

Try looking in the mirror.

Can you see what the problem is yet?

The problem is you.

Yes, you ARE the problem.

You ask for advice, than when people give you advice, you bite their hand and say they were being mean to you, when all they were trying to do was help you.

YOU are shitty person with a shitty personality and I pity any fool who takes it upon themselves to try to teach a shit bag like you how to do anything, but you are the type of person who is completely unteachable.

Your novel, is NOT the problem. And I can say that without having seen it, without knowing anything about it, because it's clear through your email that the problem is you.

You in arrogance, you are asking for help with your novel, but did it ever occur to you, that you spent so much time bitching about a TOR editor calling you illiterate that you FORGOT to send the manuscript you are asking for help with?

Sorry, but I can read your manuscript ad give you pointers on where to improve it, when you never even sent it to me.

And that again, shows you are the problem, because again, this email sounds as though it is the follow up to you having already set the manuscript to someone and them already replying to you, and you replying back to them, but you also being so damned drunk out of your mind that you couldn't be bothered to check that you sent it to the right person.

Talk about being unprofessional.

If you keep going at this rate, you'll find yourself being blacklisted by every publisher and editor on the planet.

>>>I like criticism as it allows me ample perspective into my world, and how I can apply it to make it even better. And I have been applying it, and it feels good to be able to think about the work.


Wow, how bi-polar are you?

Yes, taking critics words and improving your work is a good thing. So why don't you do it? Why are you writing this crap feast email when you could be working on developing better writing skills?

>>>So when someone recommended books and authors, I was appreciative of their comment. I even said thanks but even that was downvoted lmao.

Uhm... okay?

Did someone recommend books and authors to you?

It wasn't me, so again, I'm thinking you've made a fool of yourself here, sending this email to me instead of whom you wanted to read it.

lmao is a very unprofessional thing to put in an email to a professional, when you are looking for professional advice on getting your foot into a professional career.

>>>But people giving me general advice I already know, doesn't add much. And when I try to give my view, it's like I'm automatically wrong. And no, I'm not taking social media seriously. And I write both for myself and others, so I'm always trying to reach a balance that's best for us, but I also don't want to lose the reason I write.

Uhm... okay?

Again, I've given you no advice, so this email seems miss-mailed. But now that you've sent me this email, I will give you advice.

My advice?

You're a whinny, annoying brat. Grow up.

General advice you already know, doesn't add much?

Okay.

I don't know what general advice you were given, but, honey, chances are high that you NEEDED that advice, that's WHY it was given to you.

Just because you already know something, doesn't make the advice bad when someone tells you what you already know.

Why?

Because the general advice you already know is often the advice you need the most, because it's probably the thing you are not doing, simply because you think you are too good for the basics.

I've seen many do this. Basic grammar skills are tossed aside and than they wonder why their manuscript was rejected. Than people online read the manuscript to offer advice, and every one tells him that the story is great but the grammar sucks and is borderline illiterate, and the manuscript only needs to have basic grammar fixed. But he goes psycho meltdown saying his grammar is perfect, he won't fix it, he's not illiterate, fuck everyone, the basic advice to fix his grammar is not helpful, so he says, as he pouts away, refusing to fix his basic errors, so he goes the rest of his life unpublished because he is too arrogant to fix basic errors.

I've not seen your manuscript, but I've seen your email, and your grammar IS illiterate and you ARE making very basic errors, so I'm not surprised people are giving you general advice.

Have you not considered that the REASON so many people are giving you general advice may possibly be because you NEED that advice?

Just because you know something, doesn't mean you are putting it into practice.

>>>I was just wondering how others express their style. But so far, I've seen people struggle with their works and then give critique like they're perfect, it's just a sad situation. People don't even know my background.

Uhm... okay?

What does your background got to do with anything you've said in this email?

If you want people to know your background, than tell them.

It's on you if they don't know. You've no one to blame but yourself if you didn't tell them.

>>>I was just wondering how others express their style. 

I said the before, but I'm gonna ask again: Have you ever once read a novel in your entire life? It really sounds like you haven't.

You'd KNOW how others express their style if you were reading novels.

Every author has a unique style and they express it quite well. And this is simple basic knowledge that is known by EVERYONE who reads novels.

It sounds to me like you don't like to read novels, yet you want to write a novel. 

While you CAN get published having not read novels, you'll find it rather difficult to achieve.

If you were constantly reading novels, you would know what's been done before and how others have done it, you would know the standards readers of each genre expect to see, and you would know WHY stepping outside of those standards is not the best road to take.

I know you don't want to hear general basic advice, but, the best way to developing better writing skills, really is to just read, read, read, read, read, and read some more. 

Read new releases. Read obscure out of print books from the 1950s to 1970s. Read smutt. Read the classics. Read trash with bad reviews. Read bestsellers with glowing reviews. Read every genre: Fantasy, Sci-Fi, Romance, Woman's Fiction, ChickLit, Gothics, Bizarro, Horror, Westerns, Adventure, Mysteries, and more. If you don't want to read novels, than read short stories, they come in all the same flavours as novels do.

Read EVERYTHING. Read the good. Read the bad. Read the ugly.

And take notes.

Why did you like this one and not that one?

What was it that made you not finish this one here? What was it that made you not able to put that on there down?

The best writers out there are also the biggest readers out there.

If you ain't reading, you WILL struggle with your writing.

Believe me, it SHOWS in your writing, if you are well read or not, and your writing tells me that you don't read. You'd have way better grammar if you did. If you were well read, you'd know how incredibly illiterate your writing really is.

Here have a few...

>>>I was just wondering how others express their style. But so far, I've seen people struggle with their works and then give critique like they're perfect, it's just a sad situation. 

You ARE aware that not many published authors are online critiquing new writers, right?

People struggling with their works, are generally people like you, who are too arrogant to take advice, scuff at advice they think is beneath them, and... wait... didn't you say you like to edit the work of others but you are yourself struggling to get published.

>>> I've seen people struggle with their works and then give critique like they're perfect, it's just a sad situation.

Look in the mirror much?

Yes, it IS a sad situation, especially when you can see it in others but you can't see it in yourself.

You are doing the very thing you are complaining about others doing.

Did you not notice that?

>>>I think it came out well. My writing experience has been very different.

Why? How?

You say it is different, but is it.

I can guarantee MINE is different. But are YOU, really so different than you think. You say nothing to support this, and I'm left to wonder, why you feel different, when chances are high you are not.

I'm the founder of the Proctor and Gamble Boycott. Did you know that?

Did you also know I was completely unaware I had founded it until nearly 30 years after I had done so?

I am EelKat, the one and only, Voice of the Voiceless.

Did you not research me BEFORE you contacted me?

You should have.

You REALLY should have.

Let's talk about recent events on Twitch. About a vile woman who discovered how different I really was and thought it was a funny thing to make jokes about.

And how I came to be the founder of The Proctor and Gamble Boycott.

I'm the author of a series that spans 130 novels, celebrates it's 42 anniversary this year, and feature an Elf Wizard main character. I have a 4 decade long love affair with Elven Wizards no matter where I find them.

And people wonder what the hell? Why did you get so crazy obsessed over Avallac'h?

* I love Elves.

* I love wizards.

* I hate torture.

* I have an actual medical diagnosis of having a Florence Nightingale Personality Disorder

*  I have an actual medical diagnosis of having Kanner's Syndrome

*  I have an actual medical diagnosis of having Severe Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

* I'm the founder of The Procter & Gamble Boycott, meaning vivisection is a pet peeve of mine that I fought 27 years of my life to eradicate

* I really hate torture in all forms but vivisection is the worst of all because it's how P&G killed my 2 dogs.


And the game Witcher 3 decided to drop a dying, vivisected, comatose Elf wizard, strapped to a torture table in my path.

I really, really, really HATE vivisection, and well, you can see the end result of the game giving me a vivisected Elf wizard.

Florence Nightingale Personality Disorder: someone suffering from an innate mental and emotional need to rescue victims and heal the sick; prone to developing a strong emotional, romantic, or erotic connection toward the patient being cared for

Vivisection torture: slicing open someone's veins without anesthetics for the purpose of injecting toxins into their bloodstream.

aka

The Draize Eye Test: pouring Draino, Tide, Windex, Mr. Clean, Duracell battery fluid, and other toxic household items into the eyes of cats and dogs then counting the seconds/minutes it takes for the cleaning product to burn their eyes out of their head; on beloved family pets, lost cats and dogs, bought by Procter and Gamble from your local animal shelters. 

In the 1970s and 1980s P&G had no less than 3 animal test labs in each of all 50 states and advertised the Draize Eye Test as a way to put unwanted shelter animals to good medical use.  

I found out about it when 2 of my dogs got lost, and we traced them to an animal shelter, but it took a week for us to raise the money to buy them back and by that time P&G had already bought and killed them. 

I spent 27 years spreading the word of this and April 2013 P&G shut down all of their animal test labs and today are a animal-friendly company.

In a time long before the internet or social networking existed, I gathered together the support and backing of some of the world's largest corporations, politicians, including American presidents, and demanded an all out full stop on the sales of every product made by P&G, until they shut down their animal test labs. 

I hand wrote and mailed out 21,000 letters that first year. Then took secretarial typing, trained to reach a typing speed of 175 words per minute and increased my output by typing those letters.

No, not a class. I never went to school. I was caged since I was 8. My grandmother gave me a textbook on secretarial typing and typewriter, so I could increase my output of letters that she mailed... though I never knew where she mailed them.

Over the course of 27 years I typed up millions of letters, and gained a following of 300 million (three hundred million) people to type up letters with me. Though I did not know it at the time. I was alone. No access to news, TV, none of those things. Grammy Eva mailed the letters. She was the source of the addresses of politicians and businesses... not me. I only wrote the letters. Only this and nothing more.

I was 31 years old before I had the world outside of the clan. So I had no idea, for all those years, just how big of an impact all my hundreds of thousands of letters had, had on the world, on society. 

Unlike the Social Justice warriors of today, whose only real goal is 15 minutes of fame and their face on TV.... I had only one motive: for someone to please, please, please let me out this cage.

They called me "The Voice of the Voiceless" and said I spoke through the eyes of the animals. They didn't know how wrong they were.

When I found out that hundreds of millions of people read my P&G letters over the course of those 27 years I spent locked in a cage... it was heart breaking for me to see, what they THOUGHT those letters were, verse what those letters ACTUALLY were.

They thought the letters were fictional. They thought I was pretending to be a rat, locked in a cage, in an animal test lab, begging to be let out.

Nothing could have been further from the truth. And it horrified people when they found the truth.... that those letters, was not someone pretending to be an animal in a cage.... rather, those letters were written by a real, live, little girl, locked in a cage, only let on Sunday to go to church with the clan, then back in the cage, to wait for the endless line of men, who paid uncles money to rape children.

So many millions of people read my P&G letters, and mistakenly thought I was demanding animals be released from cages, when in fact, I was begging for someone to release me from a cage.

It speaks volumes.... how far, so many millions of people twisted my words, and used my words.... animal test labs were shut down in the name of EelKat Voice of the Voiceless, but not one of them, ever thought to locate the child behind the letters and find out, why she wrote so many millions of letters all begging for one thing: Please help me! Please let me out of this cage.

I wrote those letters for 27 years and no one ever helped me.

The FBI raid wasn't there for the children. They didn't even know we existed They found us while they were there. The FBI raid was for Heaven's Gate. The religious group my uncles belonged to. 39 people died in California, so many miles away from Maine. But the FBI raides every one of the Heaven's Gate Compounds trying to find out who know about the 39 murders in California... and that's how they found us children, now adults.... and world found out how wrong they were, in thinking the P&G letters was someone writing, the letters as though they were written by animals in cages. The discovery that the author of the P&G letters WAS in fact locked in a cage.... was the shock wave, that brought down the P&G Boycott and made people step back and look at how far, they had mistranslated my letters.

A child, locked in a cage, tortured, starved, and vivisected, was writing letters BEGGING FOR HELP... letters always signs "EelKat"... and the world, was so in furry, to rescue animals, they hundreds of millions of people were able to read those letters, and incorrectly assume, they were written by an adult, pretending to be an animal locked in a cage.

And those tens of millions of people, were so driven to rescue animals, that the child writing those letters, never received help and was never let out of the cage, until 27 years later, when her uncles who kept her prisoner, finally got involved with something big enough to bring in the FBI: Heaven's Gate and the murder of 39 people.

And so while, I eventually gained my freedom.... it wasn't because someone ever gave enough of a shit about me to want to help me. It was because, I happened to be found, while the FBI was looking for something else.

So no one ever did try to help me. Why? Because they were too busy with their own agendas.

Too busy rescuing animals to rescue a child.

I inaccurately get branded as an animal rights activist because of those letters I wrote.

Why?

Because people could see past their own thoughts to think that I might not have been what they thought I was.

#YOU<<<thinking about animals in cages when I was asking to be let out of a cage DOES NOT mean I was asking you to rescue animals from cages!

#I SAY WHAT I MEAN, AND MEAN EXACTLY WHAT I SAY!

#THERE ARE NO HIDDEN MEANING IN MY WORDS! 

#THERE NEVER HAS BEEN! 

#AND THERE NEVER WILL BE!

There is no slang, no hidden meanings, no memes, no jokes, no riddles, no pretending .... I have Kanner's Syndrome ACTUAL AUTISM.... not Aspergers. Look it up.

People had it in their heads already that they wanted to rescue animals... they just used my letters as an excuse to take action.

BUT NOT A DAMNED ONE OF THEM TOOK THE ACTION THE LETTERS ASKED FOR: 

#LET ME OUT OF MY CAGE! 

#STOP THEM FROM SLICING MY ARMS AND POURING DRAINO INTO ME!

#LOOK AT THE SCARS ON MY ARMS! LOOK WHAT THEY DID TO ME! DAILY FOR YEARS!

#NO BODY KNOWS THE PAIN OF VIVISECTION TORTURE BETTER THEN I DO!

#AND NO ONE EVER THOUGHT TO HELP ME BECAUSE THEY WERE TOO BUSY USING MY LETTER TO SHUT DOWN ANIMAL TEST LABS!

My most radical followers went to extremes blocking delivery trucks from entering store parking lots, taking ice picks to any product on store shelves with P&G on the label, slapping stickers with pictures of cats and dogs still alive with their eyes burned out on the bottles of Draino, and throwing buckets of blood on customers coming out of stores with P&G products in their shopping carts. 

I found out about those things happening years later as I was 31 years old before I ever went outside. Going outside wasn't allowed and my hatred for the animals in cages was more my own cry to be let out of cage then anything else. I only wrote the letters. My grandmother snuck paper in for me to write and mailed the letters. The uncles didn't know. They would have beaten her and moved me to a smaller cage if they had. It shocked people after the FBI raid, when they found out, the girl who wrote the P&G letters, did so while locked in a cage, smaller and less sanitary than the cages the lab animals were in.

I hate cages. I hate them alot. It comes from 27 years locked in one.

I hate vivisection torture... a HUGE LOT... and I've got the scars on my arms and legs, to show you why.

People mistake me for an animal rights activist because of all the P&G letters. They are wrong. I wasn't screaming to let those animals out in those letters.... I I was screaming to be let myself.... and the FBI raid, the P&G letters to a back burner to shutting down every other child prostitution ring my uncles ran, and letting all the girls out of their cages. THAT was my main focus of the P&G letters. But few remember that... they mostly remember that a 12 year old girl went head to head with the largest monopoly in America, and won... and did it all while locked in a cage, sleeping in feces, going 12 days between being thrown food.... my letters went down in history, people calling me "The Voice of the Voiceless" because they said I wrote those letters as though I was one of those animals being tortured in a cage.... and after the FBI raid, they found out how damned true that was.

And still fight the bastards of the world to this day, because children don't belong in cages any more then animals do. Human trafficking takes center stage in my fight for justice today, but the P&G Boycott is the fuel that started that fire in me.

Branded as radical EcoTerrorists, The P&G Boycott was the first animal rights boycott of its kind, people rising up in mass hoards, and reached alarming levels when millions of followers rose up in every country on the planet, targeting not only P&G but EVERY company with any level of animal cruelty.  And they thought they were doing it, because they thought, letting animals out of cages, was what EelKat, Voice of the Voiceless wanted.... when all she wanted was to be let out of a cage herself.

The offline social networking of the 1970s made today's online social networking of the internet, look merger at best.

The P&G Boycott spread like a plague across the planet throughout the 1970s and 1980s.

The P&G Boycott shut down the animal test labs of P&G, Estee Lauder, and Avon, while getting the words "not tested on animals" on products in the stores, and spawning it's even more radical spin off organization PETA.

The P&G Boycott was both the first and the largest Social Justice Warrior movement in history and is why we have SJWs today.

I was dubbed by my tens of millions of followers as "The Voice of The Voiceless" and since the FBI raid that finally let me out of my cage... I went on to found dozens of other boycotts, including to get the law passed that allowed LGBTQA+ citizens in America the right to own businesses.

Today we (now elderly, but still going) P&G Boycotters are currently fighting for the rights of transgender citizens and that is why I own The Transgender Awareness Tour Bus, that is what you see me going to conventions in.

And it all started with the vivisection murder of 2 dogs. An Irish Setter named Sarge and a Springer Spaniel named Bridget. The first letter I wrote.... That one went to Proctor & Gamble. It was the only one that went to them. And all it said:

*Why did you kill my dogs? They were the only friends I had. I had no one else to talk to from my cage.*

They sent me back a $10 package of coupons. A lot of good that did me.

I devoted 27 years of my life to eradicating vivisection torture from the planet... mostly because I just wanted it to stop being done to me.

Nothing is going to light a fire under my ass faster than vivisecting someone.

So... seeing Avallac'h vivisected in the Trial of Grasses, REALLY hit a nerve with me, big time, resulting in, the Avallac'h obsession you see today.

Do you have any idea how much vivisection hurts?

I do.

I lived through it for years.

I hate torture.

You can't even begin to imagine how very, very, very much I hate torture. I was tortured for decades, by monstrous uncles. And I can't stand to see any one tortured.

I've seen other torture scenes in other games, but not vivisection. They vivisected Avallac'h. Vivisection is something I know far too well.

That why I hate things like BDSM and bondage fetishes and dominatrixes so much.

Those things are people play acting torture.... but I guarantee, if they were ever really tortured, they'd never play act it again. They'd run screaming from it. Horrified.

Torture is not a game. BDSM and bondage fetishes and dominatrixes - those things shouldn't exist, because those things inspire vile perverted men to torture children.

I can't even begin to imagine, how horrible a person you would have to be, to like something BDSM and bondage fetishes and dominatrixes. Why would anyone want to take part in pretend torture? Do they not know, how much real torture hurts? 

The mere mention of torture sends nightmares through my brain, bringing back old memories of the torture I went through at the hands of my uncles.

The Ugly Baby quest. It's a torture scene. And it triggered my Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, really bad.

Had they not been vivisecting him in this scene.... I probably would have finished the game, and moved on to our next scheduled game: American Truck Simulator, followed by Skyrim, and FallOut4.

The vivisection scene is why, when we got to the end, instead of playing the next game as scheduled, we replayed Witcher 3, to go back and pay closer attention to this quest (Ugly Baby)... and at the same time we did that, there was a kidnapping and murder in my family, and for some reason, somehow, my brain focused on healing Avallac'h as a way to cope with the murder trial, lawyers, and court dates that became my daily offline life from May 2015 to October 2016.

June 2016, the 3, still unidentified attackers who broke my spine and hip November 2013, (and who are suspected of also being the kidnappers and murderers) returned and did it again, this time damaging my spinal column and doctors can't operate, they say it's too dangerous. Leaving me bedridden.

When the murder trial ended at a stand still because the murderer is not yet identified.... and family members I normally would have played games with weren't there because their heads had been nailed to my door... I just replayed Witcher 3 a third time instead of doing anything else.

Avallac'h had not yet taken center stage...

...and had I not been beaten, crippled, and bedridden just before reading the novels, he probably wouldn't have.

I read the novels near the end of my 3rd playthrough and, the rape scene on page 179 of Lady of the Lake, the scene that leaves Avallac'h brutally beaten, and crippled the rest of his life... with injuries nearly identical to my own... hit yet another nerve with me.... and this time a much bigger nerve then the vivisecting scene had hit.

There were other things too. The baby was another big one. I know what it is to want a baby. To lose a baby. Several parts of chapter 5 of Lady of the Lake, were hitting way too close to home with real life events of my life, each one of them drawing me to empathize with Avallac'h even more.

The vivisection started it is, the baby kept it going, and page 179 really drove the nail home.

Had he not been vivisected in the game, had his desire for baby not been so strong, and had he not been beaten and crippled in the novels... you probably wouldn't be seeing my Avallac'h Playthrough today, because those  events are what inspired me to make the Avallac'h Mod and play the game the way you see me playing it today.

The problem here is... there's been any one I could identify with. How many people do you know who were locked in a cage for 27 years and continually vivisected? I don't have anyone I can talk to about it, because no one understands what it is like, because no one else ever went through it and lived. Worst Child Abuse Case in American History, that what people called it.  It's a thing so rare, that the only person I can find, who knows what it's like to go through it.... isn't even real. He's a fictional character.... Do you know what that's like?

And then people like ThingyChan come along and think it's fun to take the abuse and torture I went through and make jokes and memes about it. Calling me a BDSM Dominatrix with fetishes.... doing that behind my back, while pretending to be my friend, for the full 2 years she did it.

And what happened because of what she did? She had so many people convinced that I was a deviated sex freak, that a big streamer took to raiding my Twitch channel with the raid message "deserve to be raped".

And if that wasn't bad enough, she had people so convinced that I was the BDSM dominatrix she was lying and telling I was, that 5 men showed up at my house to gang rape me. Wasn't that nice of her?

ThingyChan, OutsideLane, Zutrix, and NivanaRavenBum  making 200+ VODs and posting 2,000+ Discord posts calling me a dominatrix, saying I was into bondage, BDSM, and foot fetishes, resulted in some incredibly perverted, immoral, deviated men showing up at my house expecting to have sex with me, expecting to find me willing to throw myself on them, expecting they could do anything they wanted to me. 

Do you know why my family moved February 2019? 

At the time I was staying with my dad on his 3rd floor apartment, in a building that had 28 families in it.

To get in the building you have to go through a front entry hall, go through 2 separate sets of doors, and then find your way through the halls and stairways to find which apartment you are looking for.

Because a group of 5 men showed up at 2AM one night. They broke BOTH the 2 front doors off and threw them out into the street. 

They made their way up the stairs, punched the glass and screens out of every window they passed on their way.

With baseball bats they smashed up all o the posts on the stair railings, broke the railings off the stairs and threw them out a window onto one o the resident's cars below.

The ripped the front door off the apartment next door to mine, went into that apartment and gang raped the 2 young mothers (sisters) who lived there with their 2 and 4 year old babies.

After that they went back outside, smashing the walls on their way down, pulling out electrical wiring and plumbing pipes as they went.

Once outside they proceeded to trash the 3 cars parked in the driveway, one of them being my Dazzling Razzberry. They used their bats to smash out the glass, and smash up the metal.

 They did more then $230,000 in damages to our landlord's building, put 2 women in the hospital, put my 82 year old dad in the hospital with a ruptured kidney,  left 28 families homeless, and totaled 3 cars, including my car which they did $30,000 in damages to.

They told the police officers who arrested them, that they were told they could find a "BDSM Gang Bang Dominatrix" living in this building. They said they found posts on Discord that claimed I had an open invitation for men to do this. At the time, I didn't know they were talking about ThingyChan's Discord.

EVERYBODY in the building had to move because the damages were so bad that the city condemned the building.

Go watch the fucking VOD... I was streaming when they showed up. We got the damned thing recorded on camera.

We had half the police in the state of Maine show up because so many of my viewers were calling the police from all over the damned fucking planet.

#I live Maine, USA. After the arrest, the police department said they had calls coming in from Finland, Germany, and Australia, reporting a massive gang attack happening live on stream!

#Yeah... that damn attack happened while I was streaming Witcher 3 and my viewers all saw it happen.

#THAT IS THE SIDE EFFECTS OF THE SEX LIES THINGYCHAN WAS SPREADING ABOUT ME ON TWITCH AND DISCORD LYING ABOUT ME SAYING I WAS A BDSM DOMINATRIX AND TELLING PEOPLE I WAS INTO BONDANG AND BDSM AND THAT IT WAS FUCKING OKAY TO COME TO MY HOUSE LOOKING FOR GANG BANGS!!!!!!

Discord and Twitch BOTH have ToS policies stating you may not make videos or posts that...

*is threatening, abusive, harassing, defamatory, libelous, deceptive, fraudulent, invasive of another’s privacy, tortious, offensive, profane, pornographic or obscene, or promotes hate or incites violence; or misrepresents the source, identity* 

ThingyChan, OutsideLane, Zutrix, and Niv did a hell of a lot of all of the above in their 200+ Twitch VODs and 2,000+ Discord posts about me, defaming my character, slandering my name, making pornographic and obscene statements about me, misrepresenting me and my identify, causing an invasion of my privacy by inciting hate crimes and violence.

I am deeply distressed by this. 

And why did they do this?

I do not know.

Asking them why they did it, I got no answers other than they were "just having some fun" and "we was just fooling around, can't you take a joke?"

A joke?

You seriously... you call raping 2 young mothers, crippling an 82 year old man, killing a small boy, trashing 3 cars, and doing $230,000 in damages to a medical apartment building leaving 28 families homeless... A FUCKING JOKE!!!!!

What the hell is wrong with you people!

This is harassment on extreme levels of insanity!

Harassment is NOT a joke!

Rape is NOT a joke!

Vandalism is NOT a joke!

You people sure have a sick sense of what a "joke" is!

I'm asexual, a minister, have PTSD from having been been raped before... I'm bedridden and crippled from a gang of 3 strangers attacking me with baseball bats in a WalMart parking lot... the last thing I want is anything to do with sex, BDSM, or bondage. What the fuck is wrong with her spreading those malicious gossiping slanderous rumors and lies about me?

And she fucking sent those bastards to my house!

You're annoyed by my playthrough? Well, I'm annoyed by the daily dozens of emails telling me how pissed off you are.

And for those wondering: 

#How many people have contacted me? How many Ciri fans have reached out to say how pissed off they are?

The number is astounding, and way higher then the total amount of views my channel has (62, 000).

Here on Twitch, since May 13, 2018, I have received hate filled chat comments and whisper messages from 7,000+ different Twitch usernames. Many of those being death threats, included 712 Death Threats being posted in my chat, just in a single month (September 2018)

However, you can find screenshots from the Avallac'h Playthrough on nearly every social media platform out there: FaceBook, Twitter, Tumblr, Pinterest, Reddit, Nexus, Instagram, MySpace, LinkedIn, Blogger, WordPress, LiveJournal, and more.... in total 3.4 million usernames follow me in these places.

And though those social networks, I recieve well over 1,000 hate messages from enraged Ciri fans EVERY MONTH.... in total more than 21,000 enraged Ciri fans have contacted me through the social networks.

My website, where you can find the very NSFW nude screenshots from the sex quests that never streamed on Twitch... each image of nude Ciri with nude Avallac'h gets 50,000 to 70,000 views each month. And to contact me from there, you contact via email.

The images they are referring too, I can not post here on Twitch to show you. But I can tell you I have mods that both Ciri and Avallac'h functioning - FUNCTIONING - genitals. And it's THOSE pictures that result in the biggest, longest, most ernage, most infuriated,most hate filled emails of all.... more than 20,000 of them EVERY MONTH.

#In total, since May 13, 2018 I have received hate messages, hate comments, and hate emails from an astounding more than 300,000 different email addresses.

Ask me again why I had to turn chat off here on Twitch?

One thing The Avallac'h Playthrough has taught me is that the bulk of Ciri's fans (not Witcher fans in general - JUST fans of Ciri herself) are obnoxious, deranged, psychotic, violent, hostile men in their 30s, who can not tell the difference between fantasy and reality, believe Ciri is the ACTUAL REAL WORLD wife, and are very vocal about how much they really, really, really hate Avallac'h a lot *(usually for "touching my wife/waifu" as they put it)* and want to kill me, for posting pictures of Ciri and Avallac'h as a couple.

With the level of hostility these men use in contacting me *(a bedridden, crippled, elderly woman)*, I'd hate to see what would happen if you tossed a few of these men in the same room together.... they would most definitely kill each other, because they clearly can't tolerate any "competition for Ciri's affections" (as they term it.

I think the most frightening part of all, is that these men are so deranged, so mentally unstable, that they are unaware Ciri IS A FICTIONAL CHARACTER. Some of them have gone so far as to talk of things they do with Ciri with take her on dates, and how enranged they are to learn that she's been sneaking off with Avallac'h, behind their backs.

Yeah. A surprisingly large amount of the emails, read like that: these are not normal fans. These are clearly mentally disturbed people who are not taking their meds and desperately need to.

And my guess, quite a few of them are former mental institution patients who are walking free only because the hospital they used to be straight jacketed in got shut from lack of government funding.

But damn.... it's not a few.... more then 300,000 of these enraged, hate filled men who believe Ciri is real and is their wife, have contacted me with their vehement hatred for not only Avallac'h, but also for me, for putting Ciri with Avallac'h in the pictures I post online.

That's a REALLY BIG number.

And the bulk of them include the phrase "I'm so pissed off" alongside "poor Ciri". While more than half of them include various death threats.

I don't get it. Is there some sort of internet meme going around, I don't know about, that says if you are talking about Ciri, you have to start every post, comment, email, etc you write with the phrase: "I'm so pissed off"?

That alongside what Claudia did, sending those men to my house, it's very difficult to even want to go on. Especially with the destruction of my car. It took me 4 years to build that car. I wasn't crippled then. My muscles had not started deteriorating yet. I could stand there for hours painting and gluing marbles. I did. It took me 4 years working 8 hours a day, to glue those 2.5 million marbles to that car.

And all that work gone, destroyed by hate mongers. Why did Claudia send those men to my house?

I don't understand what was going through her mind.

Why would you do something like that?

She told them I was a BDSM Dominatrix looking for a gangbang rape and sent them to my house. She thought it would make for a funny joke. Raping 2 women, the attempted murder of an elderly man, totalling 3 cars, and 28 families becoming homeless because the city condemned the apartment building because of the $230,000 in damages.... that's a hell of a BIG "joke". I'm not laughing am I? I see what Claudia did as funny at all.

A lot of people got hurt. How is that funny?

Three people almost died. Tell me how that is funny?

Twenty-eight families were made homeless. Why do you think that is funny?

Because it's something Ciri would do? Yeah, you're right. It IS something Ciri would do. But Ciri's not real. Ciri is a fictional character. 

And Avallac'h, who you hate so much, he's not real either. 

But those people who got hurt at 27 High Street in Biddeford, Maine.... those people who almost died... those people who lost their cars... those people who lost their home... They were real. They are real. 

Those 2 women that got BDSM gang raped by the men Claudia sent to our house... they were young girls in their 20s, sisters sharing an apartment, both with a baby, one 2 years old the other 4 years old. Military wives. Their husbands overseas.

Those 28 families... one was an elderly couple in their 80s taking care of their quadriplegic son. 

Another was a couple, whose wife was bedridden and on oxygen life support.

Another was a couple with 5 children, struggling to make ends meet... one of their sons has Leukemia... or he did... he's dead now.

And you know what? He might still be alive if his family hadn't been homeless for 2 weeks without access to proper care for him

Think about THAt.... especially you Claudia, because you are the one who told those 5 men they could come to my house and find me a BDSM dominatrix waiting for them. Proud of sex lies about me now? A little boy DIED because of you. You know that makes you? A child murderer by proxy. Can you live with yourself, knowing a little boy died because you spread lies about a crippled elderly woman telling men to go to her house to get BDSM bondage sex?

Have you noticed a trend?

It was a medical building. An apartment just outside of the hospital, that house critically crippled patents and their families.

I'm crippled. I need the help of nurse to take a bath, use the toilet, and to get out of bed and sit up here at the computer to stream. Yeah, it's that bad. That's why I lived there.

Children dying from cancer, housed next door to the hospital so their families could be with them during their long months of chemo. They lived there too.

You made them homeless.

Crippled elderly and crippled children. 

You beat them up, raped them, destroyed their cars, and destroyed the building they lived in.

Real, live, crippled elderly and crippled children, beaten, raped, and made homeless, because you want to fuck Ciri's fictional ass.

Are you proud of what you did?

Your little "joke", your little Avallac'h hating, Ciri glorifying, let's rape every body and smash and trash their house.... Do you know how sick that makes you?

And you sent them to my house, telling them that I was a BDSM dominatrix.

Do you even know WHO THE HELL I AM?

I am an ordained Marija Loa!

It's a type of CATHOLIC NUN!

Marija Loa.... it means married to god.

I am an ordained minister, a priestess, my rank and title being Medsen Fey Marija Loa to Damballah Weddo, in service to Erzulie Freda and Erzulie Dantor.

I was ordained a Medsen Fey in 2003 and I'm one of only 3 nuns in the United States to become Marija Loa, which happened in 2013.

It's a fucking rank in the Catholic Church!

Voodoo is a branch of the Catholic Church. 

To be ordained a minister in the Voodoo religion you are ordained by Catholic priests.

Hungans, Mambos, Medsen Fey, Marija Loa - they are Haitian words meaning Priest, Nun, Father Superior, Mother superior.

You are spreading sex rumors and sex lies about a damned nun!

Think about THAT.

Marija Loa.

A type of NUN!

Do you know what a nun is? 

A nun is a woman who is married to God. Yes, as in there is an actual wedding, with wedding dress and marriage vows. She remains celibate. Sex is not a part of her life. No men are allowed to touch her. 

Are you starting to see, how damn EVIL you are Claudia for spreading lies that someone like me was a BDSM dominatrix!

You sent gang bang rapists to the home of a Catholic Nun telling them that she was a BDSM Dominatrix!

Do you know ow many levels of HELL there are for you Claudia!

The absence of the car vlogs is worse than you know. I can't walk anymore, but I could drive. My car was my only ability to get outside, my only contact with people at all outside of Twitch. And with chat having to be shut off due to the hate... I have no one to talk to at all now.

The enraged Ciri fans are not just attacking online. A group of them showed up at my house. They nearly killed 2 of my neighbours, my 82 year old dad, they totaled 3 cars including mine, and left 28 families homeless after doing $230,000 in damages to the apartment building we was living in then. 

Why?

Because you are so delusional, that you believe Ciri is you REAL, ACTUAL wife, cheating on you with Avallac'h, because I have pictures of them together on my FaceBook?

What is wrong with you people?

Ciri is NOT your wife. And not she's not cheating on you with Avallac'h. And do you know why?

Because Ciri and Avallac'h are NOT real.

It's just a game and these are fictional characters. Don't you know that?

Why are you people doing this?

I've never done anything to hurt any of you.

What is wrong with you?

You all ought to be ashamed of yourselves.

Not just the 5 of you who showed up at my house, not just the 712 who were chanting "deserve to be raped in my Twitch chat", but every single damned one of you. All 300,000+ of you who have sent me emails telling me how pissed off you are, and poor Ciri this and poor Ciri that, all your death threats, and all you stupid jackassery.

Every damned one of you ought to be ashamed of yourselves.

Have you really got nothing better to do with your lives then send hate mail to a crippled, bedridden elderly woman?

Would you do to your grandmother what you do to me?

You call me obsessed with Avallac'h? Yes, that is true.... but what are you? You are far more obsessed with Ciri, than I am with Avallac'h, and while all I'm doing is playing a video game to alleviate the boredom of being bedridden and crippled, you are actually hurting people. Think about that.

Am I'm not the only one you sickos are doing this too. I'm just the only one speaking out against it.

I didn't used to be the only Witcher exclusive channel on Twitch. I didn't used to have the only heavily modded Witcher playthrough on Twitch. There were dozens of others, just a year ago. And you did the same damned thing to every one of them.

The guy who was playing the game as Radovid, the one who taught me how to build The Avallac'h mod.... the hate you sent him for doing a similar playthrough, playing as Radovid, with Lodge as travel companions, putting Phillipa as the sex quest girls... you fucking chased him off Twitch. That playthrough was amazing. Yeah, Radovid is a jackass and I can't stand hm, but hell that playthrough was awesome!

The girl playing the game as Yennefer and turning Triss into the sex girls, doing a full lesbian romance run of Yen and Triss saying fuck off to Geralt and travel the countryside together... you hate mongered her off Twitch!

Heck, the woman who was doing the Ciri run, playing the game as Ciri, using the fucking Shjall mod - the mod that turns every killable character into Avallac'h... the streamer who posts on Tumblr all those pictures of Ciri murdering Avallac'h... you even harassed her off Twitch! You ought to like her, she had Ciri killing Avallac'h every damned day! It was hysterical. I loved her streams. she found so many ways to kill Avallac'h, it was damed awesome, and now it's gone.

All the guys who were playing the game with WEE and Ghost Mode.... you hate mongered them away too.

The Legolas guy.... playing the game as Legolas; the guy playing the game as Batman, the guy playing the game as FF Cloud, the guy with Henry Cavill Geralt mods,... you chased all of them out too!

What the hell is wrong with you people?

You ain't fans of the Witcher series.

You ain't Ciri fans.

You're just a bunch of hate mongering trolls looking to destroy the Witcher modding community.

The Witcher 3 section of Nexus had 7,000+ mods in December 2018.... it has barely 2,000 mods now in 2020..... because you hate mongered the mod makers on Nexus so bad they deleted their accounts and pulled theirs mods off of Nexus.

You are hurting HUNDREDS of people.

Twitch streamers and Nexus mod makers alike.

And do you ever once step back and stop to think about who these people are, that you are attacking and hurting?

Did you ever once stop and think that you are hurting REAL people?

I can't tell you who the others you are bullying are, but I can tell you who I am:

I am an crippled, bedridden, elderly woman with no one to talk to. Alone 24 hours a day, for weeks to a time, sometimes going months between a 5 minute visit from family or friends. I have no one. And I can't get out of bed to do anything about it. It's why I play this game. 

And after playing the game several times, I started making mods for it.

And because I am crippled, bedridden, elderly woman with no one to talk to. Alone 24 hours a day, for weeks to a time, sometimes going months between a 5 minute visit from family or friends. I have no one. And I can't get out of bed to do anything about it. ... I have 24 hours a day to focus on making mods for this game and in the past 3 years I've made more than 4,000 mods for it. 

I don't have anything else in my life.

I don't have anyone in my life.

I'm alone in bed all day, all night, day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year, since I was attacked in a WalMart parking lot November 14, 2013, by 3 strangers with baseball bats who broke my spine, my hips, my knees, and left me crippled.

Did you think about that before clicking send on your hate? Or before getting in your car and driving all the way to my house, to lash out your hate in person?

I may be obsessed with my love for Avallac'h, but it pales in comparison to your obsession with your illogical and unwarranted hated for me, for Avallac'h, and for other mod makers in the Witcher community. 

I'm not nearly as obsessed with Avallac'h, as you are obsessed with me.

Think about that.

I'm just playing a video game.

You are destroying lives.

I'm just here playing a video game, minding my own business, not bothering anybody.

You are running around like a rabid dog looking for something to kill.

I am a gamer.

You are bully.

Maybe you ought to take a good long look in the mirror - see yourself, the way I see you: for your are pure evil.

The extreme amount of hate and the excess levels of the hate I get from this, something that I do love very much, is depressing, terrifying, and discouraging, to say the least, especially, there is never any good or kind comments and emails to offset the hate, and when there is at the same time not one single person out there who is also a fan of Avallac'h for me to talk to at all.

#The exponential increase of hate mails since the release of the Netflix series, alongside my daily worsening health is why streams are no longer daily and no longer 12 hours. 

My muscles are deteriorating, the pain in my joints is excruciating, and it is increasingly difficult for me to sit up at all, let alone get out of bed, and with the amount of hate I get thrown at me, it gets ever harder to even want try to fight against the pain in my muscles to try to stream at all, when there is little joy in streaming any more.

ThingyChan, OutsideLane, Zutrix, and Niv making 200+ VODs and posting 2,000+ Discord posts calling me a dominatrix, saying I was into bondage, BDSM, and foot fetishes, was incredibly damaging to my reputation, my career, and put my life in extreme danger.

Not only that, but what they did put 3 people in the hospital, made 28 families homeless, totaled 3 cars, and a the landlord and his family without a job. And ThingyChan, not only refused to apologize, she doesn't give a shit "because it's fun!" Well, excuse me if I don't see what is fun about being a dick and hurting people.

What the hell is with people like her? How do people get like that? 

Wasn't my life enough hell without pieces of shit like her adding more hell to it?

She's no different from my uncles. stabbing me with forks, slicing my arms with shards of a broken plate... and pouring Draino into the wounds, to watch my blood bubble and foam. 

Bastards out of hell every one of them.... my uncles and the jackes online who think it's funny to make jokes about what those bastards did to me.

Why do I like Avallac'h so damned much? Because I don't have anyone else and he was tortured with vivisection too.

And that picture here, of Avallac'h strapped down to the torture table, slipping into a coma from being vivisected while Vesimire says Avallac'h's nerves are damaged resulting in trembling fingers and frozen pupils... that's the scene that set me on the path that lead to the creation of The Avallac'h Mod.

I really, really, really hate vivisection and can't stand to see it done to someone, because it was done to me and I know how the hell much that hurts.

Yes, I am the REAL EelKat... since 1997 I make the laws for my people, pass judgments, and oversee punishments and executions.

Most famous for having taken down 13 Clan Kings of New England's infamous "Scottish Mafia" and rising up as the strictest, least lenient leader The Scottish Gypsies of New England have had since the 1530s.

Working alongside FBI agent Andy Drewer, I've sent 14 of The Scottish Mafia's worst drug lords and child prostitution ring leaders in prison since 2015.

I'm taking down every last man who tortured me. Every last man who locked me in a cage. Every last man who electrocuted me. Every last man who raped me. Every last man who beat me.

I was locked in a cage when I was 8 years old, left 10 to 12 days between meals, sleeping in feces, only let out when an American showed up with $20,000 to rape a child... and I wasn't let out until I was 31 years old when an FBI raid rescued me, and the 140+ others who had had the same thing done to them.

I took over the clan as its leader less then a year after the FBI raid and I've made sure to eliminate every last child abuser, every last drug maker, every last spouse abuser, every last drug dealer, every last rapist, and every last bastard who ever murdered a child.

No more children beaten to death, sawed up and buried in the backyard.

Never again, will they sell a 5 year old for sex.

Never again will a child starve to death while locked in a cat carrier.

Never again will they saw up a teenager and cook them in stew, feed them to the other children, then toss their bones in the swamp.

I'm taking down every last child abusing, child raping, child torturing, child murdering, cannibalistic, drug dealing, bastard among them....

...along with everyone who helped them, and everyone who thinks what they did was a good funny thing to make jokes and memes about.

And I don't stop with the bastards who tortured us children... I won't let anyone use what happened to us to make stupid ass sex memes or jokes online either.

If you ever once thought about making fun of the abuse we children went through, I will find out, I will hunt you down, and I will destroy your life.

I don't take shit from my own people so I also won't take shit from mindless, ingrate pieces of shit who try to be toxic bastards in my Twitch chat. If you want to talk to me, you better make damned sure you are worthy to even grace my presence at all... 

The smartass little stunt ThingyChan pulled is the last fucking straw. 

I can't think of anything more evil, more vile, than what ThingyChan did when she took the torture my uncles did to me and my cousins, rapists, murdered, and cannibals... they raised us like we were food!

You think that's funny!

You think something to make BDSM sex memes jokes about!

ThingyChan, you filthy piece of shit! You're as bad as they are!

Did you ever once stop and think about the shit we went through! They raised us as food, and sold our bodies to be raped by strangers while they waited for us to be tender enough to slaughter and cook!

We spent our entire childhoods, teen years, and young adult years in cages too small to fit in!

Did you know not one of us knew how to speak in human languages, but were fluent in cat and chicken, our ability to "speak" limited to hissing and clucking?

Did you know 140+ of us were classified as "feral children" and after being rescued during the FBI raid, spend more than a decade learning how to do basic things like using toilets, brushing teeth, eating with forks, and bathing?

And you think that kind of long term abuse and torture is fucking funny?

You think that's something to make jokes about!

How much did my aunt Barbie Jean pay you to make those memes? Yes, I saw her in your Discord and Twitch chat.... don't think I didn't. Along side of bastard Shem and Yvonne. You picked the wrong damned people to have your ha-ha's with... Barbie Jean, Shem, and Yvonne were front running in abusing us children, Shem is a fucking cannibal who butchered his own sisters and ate them. The FBI is actively hunting the 3 of them down right now, and your "cute little sex memes" and befriending them in your Discord, has branded you an accessory to their crimes.

Did you know Barbie Jean's husband Paul Martel went to prison for selling the bomb making parts to members of Isis, that killed dozens of people in the Boston Marathon?

Did you know Barbie Jean's son Scott Jurgen went to prison first for drug dealing at Scarborough Downs race track, and less then a year after being released, went back to prison for impersonating a police officer?

Did you know Shem Atwater and Yvonne Johnson are the founders of The Loyalist White Knights of the Ku Klux Klan - the single most violent branch of the KKK to ever exist?

Did you know that by having Barbie Jean, Shem, and Yevonne in your Discord and Twitch chat, you've branded yourself as a supporter of BOTH Isis AND the Ku Klux Klan?

You underhanded, two-faced, vile fucking piece of shit!

You were the first and only friend ever had in my entire life, and now I find out you were only pretending to be my friend so you could get inside information on what torture was like for your sick ass fucking BDSM torture fetish fan fiction about me!

How much did they pay you to fake being my friend for the entire of the 2 years you made those memes and spread them around the internet?

Oh and it keeps getting worse... in the weeks following the discovery of what ThingyChan was doing... more then 60 other Twitch streamers and viewers have now come forward to say, she did the same thing to them.... 

... she has been actively hunting down and seeking out victims of horrendous sexual child abuse, befriending them, while behind their backs making Twitch streams and posting Discord posts filled with sexual, BDSM, torture fetish lies about them.

... every one of the 60+ people who've contacted me between October 2019 and February 2020, describe Claudia as: 

* "a mean spirited bully", 

* "a self centered, bitch with no compassion, empathy, or concern for other people's feelings", 

* "a sociopath who takes sick delight in the suffering and pain of others", 

* "obsessed with sadism and bondage on horrifying levels"

More than 60 others have come forward to tell me horrifying nightmare stories of how they were sadistically and maliciously teased, bullied, belittled, and treated like shit by Claudia.

Every one of them tells nightmare stories of her vile obsession with their sex lives and building horribly slanderous lies about sexual fetishes that ThingyChan has been spreading about them.

Everyone of them said they used to be her subscribers and followers, one is even one of her chat mods... they all said they are too scared of her to dare confront her and ask her to stop harassing them. They said they felt harassed, bullied, and may to feel bad about themselves. Four of them said things she said to and about them, made them want to commit suicide. 

All of them say they were made to feel very uncomfortable by her obsession with sex, bondage, panties, and torture devices, especially giving her habit of making lewd, off colour jokes about their sex lives.

Each of them said they unfollowed, unsubscribed, and stopped viewer her channel after she lashed out at them, making up wild sexually perverted jokes about them, in some cases "pairing them up" with other members of her chat as "sex partners". 

37 of them said she had "paired them up" with me (EelKat), spreading lies about their sex lives, telling her viewers that they were among my sex partners!!!

More than a dozen of them said they felt "virtually raped" by her "endless lewd perverted sex jokes" about them.

Wow.

Just. wow.

Virtually raped.

That's exactly how I felt when I found out the sex lies she was spreading about me.

She is the worst type of online sexual predator. A person who's one goal is to run across the internet spreading fake news about other people's sex lives for the simple purpose of getting sick sadist glee in watching the relationships of couples being destroyed by her slanderous lies about their sex lives.

Virtual rape.

That is exactly what she is doing.

I thought I was the only one she was harassing, whom she had done this to and now I'm finding out she has a huge history of doing this.

She supposedly lives with her parents... my question is:

* do her parents know the type of sexually deviated shit she is doing online?

* does her mom or dad know they are paying the internet services for their daughter to be sexually harassing people online?

* would her mom and dad continue to let her live under their roof, if they knew their daughter was an online sex predator?

* and what is the contact information for her local government officials so I can report her for her predatory online sex offences?

ThingyChan is lucky she's not a citizen under my control, because the sex crimes she committed on her Twitch streams and Discord would have gotten her, her fingers cut off and tongue cut out. 

I am deeply saddened that this sexually deviated, perverted little piece of shit isn't one of my subjects and is protected from punishment by a vile government that allows online sex offenders like her to walk free without punishment.

Twitch is a place for people to come together as a community, sharing experiences, hopes, dreams, and hobbies.

Twitch is NOT a place for sex offenders to congregate and hunt down victims to virtually rape.

Twitch is NOT a place where deviated sex predators should be allowed to roam free, sexually harassing others.

Twitch is NOT a place where cyberbullies belong, especially not sexual bullies.

#TREAT PEOPLE THE WAY YOU WANT TO BE TREATED....

...you can be damned sure that however you treated me, I AM going to treat you EXACTLY the same, tenfold, seventy times seven EXACTLY like Jesus told us to do in the Bible.

Be good to me and I'll be golden to you.

Treat me like shit and I'll be your fucking damned worst nightmare.

Claudia is not the first piece of shit to try to deceive me and pretend to be my friend with no true goal of friendship and only self-centered desire to get something for nothing.

The first 31 years of my life was spent sleeping in feces, starving, locked in a cage.

My first experience with Americans was to be plastered by paparazzi all over every newspaper as a feral child who survived "the worst child abuse case in American history".

My 2nd experience with Americans was for Stephen King's film crew to show up, trespassing, unannounced, to film not one, but 2 movies on my farm, without my permission.

Since then I went on to published 130 novels, 30 nonfiction books, 2,000+ short stories, and 10,000+ non-fiction articles.

I founded The Procter & Gamble Boycott going on to spend 27 years shutting down the animal test labs of not only P&G but also Avon, Estee Lauder, and dozens of others.

All of those things has resulted in people flocking to me as fans, pissing their pants to meet me and get my autograph, but never once becoming a friend... they already have friend who they run back to screaming they shook my hand.

I've never had a friend.

Never.

Not one.

Ben is the closest thing I've ever had to a friend, and do you know who he is? He's the damned fucking high priest. Yeah, the child raping bastard who bought me for $13,000 when I was 12 years old, then spent the next 20+ years buying my mother new cars, paying my dad's tax bills, spending tens of thousands of dollars every month for decades, for the EXCLUSIVE right to be the ONLY pedophile allowed to rape me. Yeah, the sadistic man who dictated my living conditions, all those years. And he's only with me still today, because he's scared shitless that he'll get life in prison if I ever turn him in, like I did the rest of the jackass bastards I grew up with.

Ben's not a friend... he's a terrified pedophile covering his ass. An elderly man, regretting his past and trying to buy his way into heaven.

I tolerate his presence, because in spite of everything he did throughout my childhood... he's the only person I can depend on to help me now that I'm crippled. And he only does that because he's got FBI agents on his back watching his every move.

He doesn't love me. He never has. No one ever has.

My parents, my uncles, they only loved the money they could get from having an 8 year old child with 38DDD breasts.

I had my first "miscarriage" at age 14 when one of my uncles decided it was bad for business for me to be pregnant, so tossed me in a shower stall, and kicked my belly until I passed out. I woke up 3 days later, still in the shower stall, the entire bathroom a bloodbath.

ALL 7 so-called "miscarriages" have been that way. Outright murder.

Ben was the father of every murdered baby and he not only doesn't give a shit, he goes so far as to say, none of the babies were his, goes into wild, violent meltdowns accusing me of being "unrighteous and unfaithful", so he doesn't have to care... but when I was 12, he bought the exclusive rights to me, and I've not been with anyone else since.

Ben's cold, callous uncaring about the deaths, murders of his own children, at the hands of my uncles, is the number 1 primary reason why I like Avallac'h... 

Avallac'h loves babies and hates people who kill them. It's rare to find a man who wouldn't kill a baby, even their own. Real men hate babies. Avallac'h doesn't. Real men kill babies. Avallac'h kills baby killers. 

A man who doesn't kill babies is among the rarest thing there is. Real men are evil. All they care about is sex. They don't care about your health. They don't care about your safety. They only care about their dicks. And babies are in the way. Men massacre babies without batting an eye. 

Avallac'h's love for babies, alongside his fierce, violent protection of babies and their mothers, marks him as a rarity among men and a hero beyond any hero out there.

I was only one of the 140 nieces, my uncles regularly chained down, then jumped on their stomachs while they were pregnant. David was the worst. He was a 6'4" weight lighter, he'd tie the girls down, then beat their bellies with his 200lb weights.

That's the reality of child prostitution rings.

Go to my VOD list. Look for the VOD uploaded April 24, 2019, with the phrase "NSFW" in its title. The video includes footage of the sawed up bones, of 31 of those girls, being dug up on my farm.

Not everyone lived through their so-called "miscarriages". Nearly half died with their babies.

The FBI is still looking for more 200 girls between the ages of 4 and 12, who went missing in the 1970s and 1980s. I know where they are. August 16, 1991, uncle Mervin Bruce Atwater, alongside grandpa David Henry Atwater drove a caravan to Canton Lake, Canton Maine... I spent that 7 hour drive, tied up, gaged, and locked in the trunk of one of the several dozen cars involved in that caravan.

They Heaven's Gate murders happened just 5 years later and is what caused the FBI raid that rescued me and 140 others.

But the FBI first showed up at the farm in 1987.

The FBI started hanging around a lot in 1990.

And then, August 16, 1991, the entire clan gathered, from all over Canada, New England, Utah, Arizona, Colorado, Wyoming... thousands of them, in the biggest "family reunion" the Scottish Gypsies ever held... on Canton Lake.

Those 200+ missing girls... are at the bottom of Canton Lake. 

Lead by David Henry, Mervin Bruce, David, and Shem, the oldest of the grandchildren - men in their 30s and 40s - slit the throats of those girls, gutted them, sawed them up, boiled their meat off the bones, and then made a game, with the youngest children - boys all under the age of 12 - a contest to see who could throw bones the farthest, off a high cliff out into the lake...  in what they referred to as a "Moose poaching camp"... a huge hunting camp that they usually used for processing poached moose. ... a moose processing camp, owned, run, and operated by Barbie Jean.... 

The Atwaters are monsters!

They knew the FBI was coming down on them, so they decided to hide the evidence of the child prostitution ring.... thus they spent the night processing the meat of those 200+ young girls, and then, loaded the steaks into the backs of the door-to-door steak trucks that you see all over Maine, and sold them as "deer meat steaks".

That's what happened to the 200+ girls that went missing, and didn't get rescued with the 140 others, during the FBI raid that shut down the biggest child prostitution ring in America.

You see the constant police and backhoes digging up my farm at 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine - it's been going on since the first bodies were dug up by coyotes in 2016, ... if you're local, you've seen it, the hundreds of rusty oil barrels the FBI and police are digging up in my yard... the crowds of locals gathering around my farm, and police simply saying: "We are investigating cannibals" and giving no more details.

The oldest barrels they've excavated so far, date to the 1920s.... the bulk of them are from the 1950s to 1970s.... 

In those oil barrels are the bones of children. Little girls, 8, 9, 10, 12 years olds, who dared commit the sin of getting pregnant when white Americans paid $20,000 to rape them.

Americans like to spread all kinds of rumors about the group they call "The Scottish Mafia", but the reality of the so-called Scottish Mafia, is far worse then the stupid ass rumors.... a clan of cannibals, who raised little girls like they cattle, girls who spent their childhoods in cages, let out only long enough to be raped by American men willing to pay the highest prices, then slaughtered eaten as steaks when they turned 14 years old.... that's the REAL Scottish Mafia, a very big far cry from what you see portrayed as "Scottish Mafia" in TV and movies isn't it?

We females were seen as livestock.

Kept in cages, even puppy mills wouldn't dream of using.

Let out long enough to be raped by strangers.

Our rape babies beaten out of our bellies, on the orders of their fathers, who the uncles blackmailed more money out of. Pay money to beat the 8 year old child carrying your rape baby, ensure no one finds out what you do in your spare time.

Then slaughtered for food when you turn 14.

Your bones, sawed up, packed in oil barrels, and buried in the swamps.

They thought the swamps would rot the metal barrels, rot the bones.

They were wrong, weren't they?

The peat bog moss of the swamp preserved them. And now they are being dug up.

Go watch the VOD. See the bones being excavated out of my farm for yourself.

That is what I grew up with.

That is MY background.

That is MY experiances.

What are YOURS?

You say they are differant?

Are they?

My experiance is most Americans think their experiances are differant from each other, but in fact they are not, and not one of them comes even close to how different MY experiances are.

Daily being raped from the time I was 4 years old

When any of children got pregnant, our bellies were crushed.

And when we reached the age of 14, we were cut up into steaks and sold as fucking deer meat.

Have you noticed that in 2016, the door-to-door deer steak trucks all but vanished in Maine? Yeah. Now you know why. A lot of them are in prison now for selling human not deer steaks.

#If you have any information regarding this case, FBI Agent Andy Drewer out of the Portland, Maine FBI office is in charge of the investigation. He can be reached @ +1-(207)-774-9322

I'm one of the few who survived, because I had papers. When I was 12, a millionaire high priest from Austria, bought exclusive rights to me, and he also got me legal paperwork: American citizenship, a social security number, a birth certificate - things females in this clan were not allowed to have. Ben is the only reason I went on to become one of the few girls still alive today, and not sold as deer steaks when I turned 14.

A lot of people don't know WHY I got so damned mad at ThingyChan, when she took events from my childhood and made BDSM sex fetish memes about it... because unlike ThingyChan, a lot of people don't know the full details of what happened to me, what I saw happen to my cousins.

Half the time they weren't killed humanely... Anastasia... was only 4 years old, when on August 21, 1991, she had her leg pulled off her body.... the intestines came out with the bone .... her breakfast half digested spewed out all over the floor mingled with the blood... it took her 5 damned days to finally bleed to death. And they left her laying their, while the older male cousins, Shem leading them, kicked her, punched her, and raped her, over and over again.

#THEY FUCKING TORTURED HER TO DEATH!

Do you know what it feels like to have your head held down on a cement cinder block while a more traditional red brick is slammed into your face?

I do!

It was a common punishment.

I can even begin to count how many times my jaw was broken that way.

#Do you see now how incredibly VILE the sex joke memes ThingChan made about the torture I went through, is?

#HOW DISGUSTING THINGYCHAN IS FOR CALLING A 4 YEAR OLD BEING TIED DOWN, RAPED, AND JAW BROKEN WITH A BRICK, A BDSM SEX FETISH!!!!!

ThingyChan is a bad as the fucking men who did that to us!

How dare she call the torture we went through BDSM sex fetishes!

Over 300 little girls between the ages of 4 and 14 were MURDERED!

What kind of a sick bastard makes sex jokes about THAT?

#WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH HER!!!!!

There has never been a time in my life, when I wasn't suffering in pain from broken bones that never got set, ruptured organs that left me bleeding for weeks on end. Not once being allowed to go to the hospital.

My hip dysplasia was caused by having a 2 foot long foundation nail driven through my hip when I was 4 years old.  

I've heard people say sex was good, fun, happy... I've never had sex that wasn't forced, wasn't rape, wasn't brutal, and didn't leave me without broken bones or torn muscles. Sex is the worse, most evil, most horrible, vile, pain riddin form of torture there is. I can't even image how anyone could enjoy being beaten, having their bones broken, strangled, stabbed with knives, forks, and broken glass plates... sex the most awful thing there is, I can not understand how anyone would want it.

The only good thing about sex is the babies that come from it, but all of mine were murdered before they could be born. I was never allowed to raise any of my babies, and I nearly died after every beaten that killed my babies. 

The most recent one, they beat me with metal baseball bats and golf clubs, left me not only without my baby, but with my spine, hips, and knees broken, I'm crippled for the rest of my left and have spent the last 6 years relearning to walk.

No one has ever been kind to me.

No one has ever hugged me.

No one has ever kissed me.

No one has ever loved me.

There are only 2 things I've ever wanted: a baby and a friend.

America has laws, a woman my age can't adopt, you have to be under 45 in order to qualify for consideration to adopt a child in America; and the last beaten, left me unable to have children.

That leaves me with only one thing left to hope for in life: a friend, someone to talk to. I've never had that. Not once. More than half my life was spent locked in a cage, with no lights, no heat, total darkness, in a room with no windows, no nothing, just mold and fungus several inches thick on rotten walls, and a dirt ledge floor, bare ground, no floor boards. Alone for weeks on end, not knowing if or when I would ever see a person, if or when I would be given another burned saucepan to claw scrapings off of.

#When the FBI raid happened, I was

* 31 years old, 5'6" and weighed 87lbs. 

* my bones and muscles were (and still are) brittle and falling apart from 2 decades of extreme malnutrition. 

* I was nearly starved to death and the rescuers estimated I would have died with in the next few months had the raid not happened

* the room was filled with the bones of others who had died, been tossed in the room, their flesh eaten by the same rats that chewed on my arms and legs each night... they had all been beheaded, so no heads or skulls were ever found and the FBI continues to excavate the area and dredge local waters in search of the skulls, to this day

* It had been decades since I'd last eaten a meal, with as many as 2 weeks passing between being tossed a burned pan to scrap out. 

* I couldn't see in daylight because I'd spent so many years in total darkness. 

* And I didn't know how to speak human languages, was only able to speak cat and chicken, due to the only ones I had, had to talk to in that time, was the feral cats that snuck in through the cracks in the walls at night, and the chickens who were put in the room in the winter to protect them from the cold.

* I had no social skills, did not know how to communicate with others; was only able to communicate via writing; 

* because the only physical touch I had ever had from anyone was being raped or being beaten... I had (and still have) a massive phobia of humans getting near me and am prone to massive meltdowns of total hysteria if someone gets within 5 feet of me

* I had (and still have) a massive phobia of forks, seeing them as weapons, not food utensils, due to have been stabbed, scarred, and tortured with sharped forks by my uncle Mervin Bruce Atwater, so many dozens of times

* I was 37 years old before I found out I was a human, and not a demon, like I had been raised to believe

* I got my driving permit at age 34 and got my driver's license at age 35

* I started school at age 35 and got my GED at age 37

* many of the children who did not reach adulthood and died in those horrendous conditions, killed themselves before reaching the age of 16... I was the only one rescued who not only reached adulthood, but was in my 30s at the time of the raid

* when the team of psychologists, psychiatrists, and social workers assigned to me asked what kept me from killing myself like the bulk of the others had done... in those 27 years of hell, I held on to 2 memories: when I was 6 years old Grammy Eva had taken me to the Ice Capades, and when I was 7, in the weeks before Grammy Helen's death I had watched The Liberace Show with her every week.

* my 2 grammys - one who lived in Hawaii and wore Muumuu & kimono - the other who in her 80s drove a orange metal flake 3-wheel motorcycle and wore neon purple pantsuits; The Ice Capades, and The Liberace Show were my only memories of the outside world... bright, colourful, and happy... and are why I wear the bright coloured clothes I wear today

* I held onto the memories of my good, kind, loving, compassionate grammys, and that's the only thing that kept me alive, I thought that if I ever escaped, the outside world would be like them... but now that I've met the outside world, I know that my 2 grammys were flukes, and that I was locked up because I was a fluke like them, and humanity hates kindness, compassion, and goodness because the entirety of Humanity is EXACTLY like my uncles - cruel, evil, hateful, abusive, mean, incapable of love, compassionless, and not deserving of the life God gave them - In my years since the FBI, I've yet to met a single, solitary person, who was kind, good, compassionate, or loving

* the team of psychologists, psychiatrists, and social workers assigned to me, all agreed that they did not believe I would ever be able to assimilate into HUMAN society, due to my extreme hatred for and fear of HUMANS, and my total 100% belief that I was not a HUMAN, caused by my mother's extreme paranoid schizophrenia, and her having locked me in a cage in that isolation room on my 8th birthday because she believed faeries had stolen her real daughter and replaced her with me, a demon changeling

* the team of psychologists, psychiatrists, and social workers assigned to me, all agreed that I likely will never be able to feel any empathy for or towards HUMANS, due to 3 decades of being raised by violent mentally unstable humans who had severe untreated schizophrenia that they bounced off each other... with them glorifying the glories of them being HUMAN and us children being DEMONS unworthy of living in HUMAN presence

* the thing this group of 24 psychologists, psychiatrists, and social workers found to be the single most disturbing fact of all, was that ...

#my 3 decades of neglect, abuse, and isolation was so extreme that I possess no sympathy, empathy, compassion, pity, or ability to identify with Humans - the only emotion I feel towards humans is loathsome hatred and the unnerving desire to kill them all

* they said my total lack of any good feelings towards humans, combined with my extreme desire to kill all humans, alongside my having been raised to believe I was not human, marked me as an anomaly that they didn't know how to properly diagnosed because nothing like my case had ever been encountered before and there was no diagnosis for it

* among things included in my diagnosis, was the phrase: 

>>>"is a UFO suicide cult survivor"

and

>>>"was raised by radical fundamentalist extremists"

and

>>>"was raised to believe she was not human"

and

>>>"was raised to believe she was a demon"

and

>>>"in interviewing the adults who raised her, 52 of then maintain the belief that she is a demon channeling that they refer to as 'Her Grandmother's Evil Spirit'", "they claimed the real child ceased to exist after her grandmother's funeral", "they claimed that upon returning from the funeral, the real child was gone and this demon changeling was left in her place"

and

>>>"evidence suggests that her grandmother was murdered and she witnessed this event, resulting in the adults who murdered her grandmother creating the delusion that she was a demon, removing her from public school, and locking her in a cage in order to prevent her from telling anyone about the grandmother's murder"

and

>>>"they said they could not let her out of the cage because she refused to reveal where the faeries had taken the real child to"

and

>>>"they said they had no choice but to beat her daily because of her refusal to reveal the location of the real child she had replaced"

and

>>>"they likewise believe that both grandmothers were not human, cutting they too were demons"

and

>>>"they cited that the girl inherited 'Helen's evil spirit' upon Helen's death and 'Eva's evil spirit' upon Eva's death"

and

>>>"alarmingly every adult involved in her rearing displays severe schizophrenia, total belief in demons, and is fully convinced that this girl is a demon changeling; scarily their delusions fed on each other, giving rise to even more delusions" 

and

>>>"was removed from public school at the age of 8 years old a few hours following her grandmother's funeral; an investigation was made by the superintendent of schools, but social workers never followed up on the girl's sudden disappearance from public eye. These horrific events may never have happened had The Maine State Department of Human Services taken those initial reports from the her teacher, principal, superintendent, school nurse, and the child's pediatrician, all of whom files individual reports regarding concerns for the girl's safety after witnessing several signs of abuse during the weeks prior to her disappearance"

and

>>>"reports were made to the Old Orchard Beach Police Department regarding the girl's disappearance from school. No follow up was done. It has been discovered that members of the family worked in the police department and destroyed the department's record of these reports made by concerned school officials" 

and 

>>>"has never experienced kind, good, or loving relationships"

 and

 >>>"since infancy has never been hugged, held, cuddled, or touched in a good way by other humans" 

and

>>>"displays post traumatic stress disorder symptoms similar to WW2 concentration camp victims"

and

>>>"can not remember her name, answers to the names 'four eyed retard' and 'competition bitch' which appear to be the only names her mother called her since the age of 8 years old"

and 

>>>"has never been taught to view humans as equals" 

* in the weeks following the FBI raid, my mother and her 3 sisters and 8 brothers, were all diagnosed with schizophrenia... 

* the 12 siblings, their 50+ spouses, and 400+ adult children who ran the child prostitution ring, were all diagnosed with sociopathy, 5 were diagnosed with megalomania, more the 3 dozen (including my mother) were diagnosed with Munchausen syndrome by proxy

* the group was classified as the most radical of the compounds that called themselves members of Heaven's Gate - 4 of it's leaders killed themselves in the infamous HaleBop murder/suicide that killed 39 people in California and was what led to the FBI raid a few weeks later

* the FBI raid would result in dozens of Catholic, Mormon, Pentecostal, Baptist, Born Again Holy Roller, New Life, and non-Denominational churches throughout southern Maine and the Greater Boston tri-state area being closed in the weeks/months that followed, in the mid-late 1990s, as hundreds of pedophile priests were arrested for having paid money (often $millions in church funds) to rape the young girls

* wild rumors began to surface, as horrified Americans dubbed the clan leaders involved in the Scottish Gypsy child prostitution ring as "The Scottish Mafia"

* while American movie producers had a field day stereotyping "Scottish Mafia" to mean anything and everything, we 140 survivors, had to fight claw and fang against paparazzi, alongside trying to even learn what the hell an American even was

* the worst of them, Stephen King arrived at the compound, with a huge movie crew and set out to filming a movie "The Thinner" based off what he referred to as "the Gypsies of Saco, Maine, the most REAL Gypsy style Gypsies I have ever encountered"... he and his crew were trespassers, had no permits or permissions, and today are in a legal battle against our clan trying to get the rights to release Thinner on DVD, something we absolutely refuse to sign off on - we are abhorred that he tried to capitalize on our decades of torture, pain, and suffering

* and all of the 140 others like myself, were also raised to believe they were locked in cages because they were demons

* as of 2020, more than half of the 140 survivors rescued from that FBI raid have commit suicide, due to the pressures of trying to BECOME A HUMAN and to date none have been able to see themselves as HUMANS or successfully assimilate in HUMAN society and most are still 100% convinced they are DEMONS and are unable to identify as HUMAN or live among HUMANS

* while I was 31 at the time of the FBI raid; the eldest of my brothers was only 7 years old - yes, I am old enough to be the grandmother of every one of my brothers; one of them, was so badly traumatised by the abuse he received, he does not talk still to this day

* given the fact that my mother has multi-hundreds of medical records that all list her as infertile and unable to have children, after MY 16 YEAR OLD MOTHER - a brutal "miscarriage" (caused by an overdose of sleeping pills, then having her head cracked open with a brick b an unknown attacker while she was unconscious) she had 4 years after I was born, combined with the dates of the births of my brothers vs the dates of the so-called "miscarriage" beatings, some of the psychiatrists, psychologists, and social workers involved in the case, believe that chances are high that my brothers, may actually be my sons, stolen from me by my own mother, after being beaten unconscious by her brother Mervin Bruce.... this theory was further emphasized by the fact that one of my brothers is a blue eyed blond (everyone in the Atwater family has dark skin, black eyes, and black hair, due to being 3/4 Native American and 1/4 black African) and looks exactly like Ben (a blue eyed blond Austrian), the father of my babies

#and yes, my mother was a VERY SMALL CHILD when I was born - she and I are closer in age to each other then most sisters are, which is also why people often mistake us for twin sisters and have difficulty telling us apart

* my father was 39 when I was born, making the age difference between my parents one of the youngest in the clan and one of the few where the father was less than 30 years older then the mother... the biggest age difference between mother and father is 57 years

* at age 14 I hold the record of being the OLDEST female to get pregnant, and was nicknamed by the uncles "the old maid" due to my being "so very old" the first time getting pregnant

* I was 1 of only 2 females to reach the age of 14 with fewer than 4 pregnancies under my belt

* because only 4% of all babies reach the 3 years old, babies are not named until after their 3rd birthday and are given only bare necessity minimum contact (feeding time once every 4 hours and diaper changes twice a day), to avoid emotional attachments to them; this results in most of the parents and adults feeling no emotions at all then the 97% of babies born to the clan die - a rate of about 3 baby deaths per week

* feeding babies and diaper changes are the responsibility of the "non-Human, Demon slaves", some of whom are let out of their cages for the hour long baby feeding and diaper changing sessions

* mothers rarely, if ever, saw their babies - this made it easy to sell excess (male) babies for $20,000 each to infertial American couples through fly-by-night (not legal) "adoption clinics"

* male blue eyed blond newborn babies are highly sought after by infertial American couples and can sell for as high as $200,000; thus wealthy blue-eyed blond priests from Catholic, Mormon, Pentecostal, New Life, and Baptist churches were sought out with offers to pay money to rape little girls

* the child prostitution ring was in operation for 57 years, bringing in multiple millions of dollars per year to the so-called "motel owners of Old Orchard Beach" aka The Cyr Clan, who owned it, before the FBI raid shut most of it down in 1997

* while as of 2020 most of the Atwater Clan men involved with running & managing the child prostitution ring have been arrested, the actual owners of the child prostitution ring (The Cyr Clan) whom the Atwater Clan worked for, have yet to be arrested and are still at large

* I do not know the name of the man who owned it, he rarely showed up on the farm, but when he did show up, he ALWAYS drove a giant backhoe, with a German Shepherd Dog riding in the bucket/scoop; the man looked exactly like Bo Duke from the Dukes of Hazzard, appeared to be TRYING to look like Bo Duke; he wasn't very big; most of the Atwater uncles who ran the clan were over 6'2" the tallest being 6'7" and the man from the Cyr clan barely reached to their shoulders, so he was around 5'7" tall; he was also very skinny and was flighty and nervous acting and seemed to very paranoid, he was loud and demanding and yelled a lot; in spite of his tiny size, my giant brutal, spouse abusing, child torturing uncles were terrified of him, but I never knew why; he reminded me of a chihuahua - small, loud, barking constantly, but scared of his own shadow; he was in his 30s at the time and had taken over "the business" from his father; he'd be around 65 or 70 years old today in 2020; he always spoke of owning a hotel, and every autumn arrived at the farm to hire my uncles to saw the copper pipes off of "competitors' hotels" and to burn down other hotels; throughout the 1980s and into the 2000s, every single year, no fewer than 4 and as many as 20 hotels were stripped of copper pipes and/or burned to the ground by my uncle Mervin Bruce Atwater for the Cyr Clan man, between October and December, in Old Orchard Beach, Maine - Mervin Bruce Atwater was arrested  2016 and Old Orchard Beach has not had a motel stipped of pipes or burned to the ground since; 

* the child prostitution ring was able to operate for such a very long time for 2 reasons: ... 1: there is no limit to the extremes a wealthy infertial American couple will go through to get their hands on a blue-eyed blond male newborn baby.... 2: there is no shortage of wealthy blue-eyed blond American men willing to jump on the opportunity to rape a 10 year old girl and willing to pay tens of thousands to do so

* mothers who protested this, were declared "Demons" and put in cages with the rest of the "Demons"

* the "non-Human, Demon slaves" were let out of their cages once a week for 3 hours; every Sunday to go to church, where they received weekly exorcisms to try to cast out their "Demons" and turn them "back into Humans again"

* the girl with the most babies the youngest, had had 7 pregnancies, including 2 sets of twins, by the time she was 14, making her the mother of 9 by the time she reached her 14th birthday - today she holds the clan record of the mother with the most pregnancies to live, the most babies to reach the age of 3, and the most children to reach the age of 18... with a whopping 37 of her pregnancies not only being born alive, but reaching the age of 3, and then surviving to reach the age of 18; at the age of 40, she had 200 grandchildren and 37 great-grandchildren 

* my mother suddenly and mysteriously "became infertile again" after the FBI raid and her freak unexplained popping out new babies days after each of my so-called "miscarriages"  (each one caused by being beaten unconscious at around 8 months pregnant, and waking up with the baby gone, followed by my mother's miraculous "giving birth" to a slightly premature baby a few weeks later) suddenly ceased to happen

* I was 37 years old when a team of psychologists, psychiatrists, and social workers set out to training me how to do things like walk on my feet instead of crawl on all 4s like a cat

* while today in 2020, I've trained my mind to accept the fact that Humans eat daily, and not once a week, the 27 years of eating what most would consider less than a snack, one day every week or 2, I am today not physically able to eat a daily meal because my digestive track is not big enough or strong enough to hold what ... a side effect of 27 years of extreme malnutrition and starvation

* the extreme starvation went on for so long, that even today 20 years after the FBI raid, I look like I am 9 months pregnant, because of my permanently distended "starvation" abdomen, a side effect of 27 years of scraping burnings off of sauce pans once every 12 days, and never once having a full meal in that 27 year period... I was still only 8 years old when the bloated starvation belly formed...  because it is caused by extreme levels of starvation, no amount of dieting while remove the distended starvation belly, which can only be removed by reconstructive surgery of my entire digestive tract

* the distended starvation belly is the reason I never wear tight fitted clothes, can not wear pants or skirts, and can only wear big loose fitting caftans, muumuu, and kimono as "normal" clothes do not fit over my distended starvation belly, which is so big that even maternity pants don't stretch enough to fit

* I was also 37 years old when a team of psychologists, psychiatrists, and social workers set out to teaching me how to speak in human languages instead of in chicken clucks and cat growls and hisses

* during attempting to teach me to speak, they made an alarming discovery: I spoke via chicken clucks and cat growls and hisses, not because I didn't know human languages or lacked understanding as they originally thought, but rather, because I'd been hit in the face with a brick so many times in my lifetime, that I couldn't open my jaw wide enough to form words

* x-rays and trips to a dentist, revealed massive damage to my jaw bones, cheek bones, sinus region bones, and teeth, from years of being baten in the face with a brick

* at 41 years of age I had reconstructive surgery of my jaw, including 7 root canals... meaning my jawbone and 21 of my teeth are porcelain - not real bone or teeth, resulting in I am now able to eat solid foods for the first time in my life and also am now able to talk normally (before the surgery, the damage to my jawbone was so bad that I was classified as "near-mute" due to an extreme inability to open my jaw enough to be able to form words.

* all of my molars (back teeth) were crumbled shards, with raw pulp exposed

* my jaw was broken and healed improperly, in so many places that doctors could not determine how many times I had suffered a broken jaw in my lifetime

* the broken teeth and jaw bones were a result of having my head held down on a cement cinder block, while a regular red brick was used to smash my jaw - this was a recurring punishment I received a few times a month, from the time I was 8 years old until I was 31 years old

* I stopped talking when I was 14 years old and was classified as mute for the next 16 years - I "refused" to talk, because the searing pain in my jaw was so bad that I could not open my mouth far enough to form words

* the reconstructive surgery at age 41, resulted in my being able to speak normally, for the first time in my life

* I was 42 years old when I found out the concept of things like friends and people talking to other people existed; and my desire to have a friend, someone I could talk to set in

* July 1, 2001 a backhoe with the mural of a big red apple painted on it's side, drove over my house, while me and my brothers were gone to the movie theater... my mom's brother Joey bragged on Facebook that he had hired the man to do it

* February 14, 2003 - I was stuck in traffic and arrived to my doctor's appointment 10 minutes late.... lucky for me, as I arrived in time to see the mushroom cloud as a bomb in my doctor's office blew up First Care Health Clinic on Saco Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, killing my doctor and 3 nurses, and leaving 21 patients in critical condition

* October 16, 2006 a bomb blew up my house and an 8 foot tall Ku Klux Klan cross was left behind in the rubal (keeping in mind, several members of the Atwater family are members of the KKK)

* April 2007, the same backhoe returned to drive over my house yet again

* May 15, 2010, my car, the 1964 Dodge 330, was cut in half by a group of radical members of a local church known as The Saco Ward of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints; my mother's church; her friend Joel Bailey went to prison 7 months later

* May 2013 Southern Maine Community College was evacuated when a bomb was found in the back corner of the classroom I was in

* July 2013, while driving home from my job at the Maine Mall, I was pulled off the road to wait, while police closed off the crossroad at my street.... the body of my cousin Murphy was laid out in the middle of the road, minus his head... the police found his head a few miles away at a different crossroad... he was one of the children abused and survivors rescued

* August 8, 2013 the infamous backhoe returned to drive over my house yet again and this now being the 5th house this backhoe had driven over shortly after rebuilding from the previous attack, I gave up rebuilding houses to live under a tent instead

* August 13, 2013, on my birthday, my mom's brother Joey posted on my FaceBook wall "paying that construction worker to demolish your house for your birthday was the best $600 I ever spent, Americans are such boobs, they'll do anything for money"

* November 14, 2013, while in a parking lot putting bags of art supplies in the back of my car 3 unknown people attacked me from behind with 2 metal baseball bats and a metal golf club. This was the first time since the FBI raid of 1997, that I had been pregnant again, and for nw the 7th time, had a "miscarriage" caused by a brutal beaten; but for the first time a beaten by stranger, not one of my uncles or my mother

* 2 of them were women who looked to be about 65 and acted like sisters or best friends, one with long curly orange red hair and cyberpunk looking neon lime green cyclops-style glasses and a off the shoulder sweater of large black and white stripes and screaming "I'm Kendra Silvermander, it's my turn to shine"; the other a blond wearing a denim button front work-shirt; the 3rd a bald man who acted like either the blond woman's son or lover, and had a football player muscle build

* the FBI is still trying to identify these 3 attackers; alarmingly they discovered that the username "Kendra Silvermander" appears on the friend lists of 7 of my mother's social network accounts, including Twitter, FaceBook, and Pinterest, and they now suspect that this mysterious Kendra Silvermander, the blond woman, and the bald man, are relatives of my mother's, most likely connected to her brother David

* the November 14, 2013 attack broke my spine, hips, and knees leaving me paralyzed for 5 months and 18 months to relearn to walk 

* December 2013 through 2014 and into March 2015 Kendra Silvermander took over several of my accounts, most notably KBoards and Twitter... thinking I was dead, believing she had killed me, she hacked my online accounts, pretended to be me, and made fast work of re-writing 1,371 writing how to articles I had written for KBoards turning them into mindless sex crazed drival about Erotica - the genre she knew I did not write... and the bulk of the articles were changed to say simply "COCK, COKIT, COCK, COCK" over and over again thousands of times.... because I was paralyzed in the hospital, I had no idea this was happening online. Kendra Silvermander is the most evil person I have ever encountered. And it turns out, she was paid to do what she did... by my uncle David and Bruce, the same uncles who would later in 2018-2019-2020 pay ThingyChan to so a similar sex crazed take over of my accounts.

* I returned to work in 2015, but now with limited movement and requiring a cane

* November 2015 Scarborough WalMart evacuated when a bomb was found in the department I was stationed to work in

* March 2015 Barbie Jean's husband Paul Martel was arrested  by the FBI on a Boston Mass beach for selling bombs, bomb marking parts, automatic rifles, and machine guns to members of Isis; his bombs were identified both as the bombs that were used in the Boston Marathon attacks AND the bombs in my house, doctors' office, college, and work places; branding my mom's sister Barbie Jean as the FBi's number 1 suspect in ALL of the attacks prior

* March 2015 Barbie Jean's son Scott was arrested at Scarborough Downs Race Track for selling prescription bottles stolen from the Southern Maine Medical Center (aka The Barbara Bush Foundation Children's Hospital aka the Biddeford Hospital)

* April 10, 2015 - 12 members of my family were kidnapped

* April 12, 2015 - 2 escaped and returned home, both with their jaws broken and nearly all of their teeth knocked out

* May 15, 2015, the heads of 2 of them were returned (8 more heads would be returned in the weeks following)

* May 15, 2015 Barbie Jean posted a message on my FaceBook wall which read: "the next head nailed to a dor will be yours"... she posted it 5 hours before I discovered the heads nailed to my door

* June 2016  Scarborough WalMart evacuated a second time when a bomb was found yet again in the department I was stationed to work in

* July 2016 - Kendra Silvermander, the blond woman, and the bald man, this time in a gold Volvo suv, once again attacked me in a parking lot - this time at WalMart while I was putting groceries in my car... they attacked me from behind yet again, this tie with a shopping cart, while the redhead woman screamed yet again "I'm Kendra Silvermander it's my time to shine", while the blond woman screamed "that's EelKat she tried to kill my husband"

* since the July 2016 attack I have been bedridden with inoperable damage to my spinal column and unable walk unaided with the help of others

* though I have let's played games online since 2004 (on Myspace until moving to YouTube in 2008) it was a hobby I did only an hour or 2 a week. 

* because of my permanently crippled state for the rest of my life with no hope of ever walking normally again, I joined Twitch and set out to streaming 12 hours a day

... and then I met ThingyChan...

ThingyChan was the first time someone made an effort to be my friend, no strings attached, without some altaria selfish motive... or so I thought.

I didn't know until October 21, 2019, that she had spent 2 years pretending to be my friend, while behind my back spreading horrendous, sexually deviate, slanderous lies about me, claiming that my physical therapy to relearn to walk was what she termed "BDSM bondage fetish", in more than 200 multi-streams with someone named "Outsidelane" she made wild, lewd jokes referring to me as a "dominatrix", "bondage freak", and claiming I was into "foot fetishes".

On top of that, she took EVERYTHING that my vile, evil uncles did to me in my childhood, and started wild rumors that Avallac'h had done those things to Ciri AND said that I only liked him because he was what she called "a BDSM fetish freak dungeon master with torture devices and kept Ciri in cages while sexually abusing her".... something ANYONE WHO EVER READ THE NOVELS OR PLAYED THE GAMES KNOWS IS NOT TRUE!!!

But worst of all.... do you remember the "Deserve to be Raped" raids that happened in my Twitch Chat August 2018 and I had no clue who was sending these people to my channel - I only knew that they were coming from Discord and Reddit (or so Twitch Analytics said - but it didn't say WHICH Discord or WHICH subreddit)?

It turns out, that it was ThingyChan's Discord, where she built a massive fanfiction fantasy about me, spread across an astounding 2,000+ posts over a period of 2 years, telling people I was a "dominatrix" and spreading wild lies about what she termed my so-called "bondage freak fetishes".

:(

What Claudia did, HURT, a lot.

She pretended to be not only my best friend, but also my only friend, and the first friend, I've ever had in my entire life.... she pretended to be my friend the whole time she was doing that behind my back.

Her wild slanderous lies about me on he multi-streams, JackBox streams, and Discord posts, resulted in working 712 of her viewers into wild anti-erotica, anti-bdsm, anti-bondage, anti-Avallac'h, anti-EelKat frenzies, as their fundamentalist anti-sex Christian minds, believed every word of her lewd, perverted lies about me!

Me! Someone who is even more fundamentalist Christian, more anti-sex, then even they were!

But because they only knew me from Claudia's sex filled lies about me, they fully believed that I was the evil, sex crazed, deviant that ThingChan had told them I was!!!!

They likewise knew nothing about Avallac'h, having not read the novels or played the games, but fully believed him to be the "dungeon master with torture devices who kept Ciri locked in cages and sexually abused her" simply because Claudia told them that's what he was, while falsely claiming she had read the novels, when clearly the only thing she had read was the news reports about the abuse my uncles had done to me.

I am shocked and flabbergasted.

I can't understand why she did it.

She worked so many people into hate filled, rage fueled frenzies, that I had to turn my chat off.... 

.... and Claudia did that KNOWING that Twitch chat was my ONE AND ONLY connection to ANY ONE AT ALL now that I'm bedridden.

Claudia made a deliberate, malicious attack on my Twitch channel, clearly hoping I would leave Twitch. But I don't know why.

What Claudia did, HURT, a lot.

Especially considering SHE KNEW what had happened to me... she KNEW IN MORE DETAIL THAN ANYONE ELSE, because as soon as she found out about it, she questioned me up one side and down the other about every last detail, and I had no reason to not tell her, seeing I didn't know then that she was using it as research for the massive fanfiction BDSM fetish erotica mems she was creating about me behind my back.

I've never known a female who liked sex.

Men are obsessed with sex.

SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX...

Sex is the only thing men care about.

They stop thinking about sex only long enough to start thinking about money.

I'm stunned to find a female who has a sex crazed brain like a male. I seriously question if ThingyChan is ACTUALLY a female or is she one of those transgender people who just passes as a female?

I can't image there is an actual female, born with a vagina, who's brain is none stop SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX, SEX... the way ThingyChan's deviate slanderous lies about me on her Twitch streams and Discord were. There has to be a penis under her skirts for her to be that vile of an ingrate.

I thought I'd finally found a human being who wasn't a piece of shit.

I was wrong.

I'm tired of not one damned person ever wanting to ACTUALLY talk to me or ACTUALLY be my friend. 

I'm sick of people who are looking for handouts.

I'm fed up with people looking to get their 15 minutes of fame.

I've had it.

I've survived hell that most people can't even stomach hearing about.

I REFUSE to be treated like shit, by a vile piece of trash like ThingyChan who thinks taking the pain and suffering of others is good thing to make fucking BDSM fetish memes about.

Claudia is 24 years old, sitting behind her computer screen, laughing, joking, making sex memes about the suffering of others...

Do where I was when I was 24 years old?


Locked in a cage that a chihuahua wouldn't even fit in. Nearly starved to death.  Hips broken. Jaw broken. Pools of blood gushing from my rectum. The bloody, clotted remains of the six month old unborn baby that had just been beaten out of my belly covering the walls of the cage.


Where was YOU when YOU were 24 years old?

#HOW DARE YOU TRY TO TURN THAT INTO A BDSM SEX FETISH MEME, YOU VILE PERVERTED, FUCKED UP PIECE OF SHIT!

#ThingyChan, Outsidelane, Zutrix, Niv and the 712 bastards they sent to my channel have taught me that there is not one single, solitary person on the planet, who was kind, good, compassionate, or loving, and that, my uncles were not the flukes I thought they were, but rather the norm.... Humanity is evil.

#ThingyChan, Outsidelane, Zutrix, Niv and the 712 bastards they sent to my channel are just like my uncles... sadistic bastards who's only happiness in life is to hurt others and cause as much pain and suffering along the way, as they possibly can.

My whole life, after every blow, I've gotten back up and moved forward, fighting ever onward against all odds, because the hope for something better, the hope that somewhere out there, someone would love me, someone would want to spend time with me, someone would want to be my friend.

But it's been endless blow after blow for 60 straight years without a single break, not once, not even for a single week.

I'm too old, and my health is to poor, for me to keep getting back up and pushing forward any more.

I've nothing to look forward to in life, nothing left to hope for.

And I've no good or happy memories to look back on.

Not once.

Nothing.

Not one single day.

No one has ever loved me.

No has ever wanted me.

No one has ever been my friend.

There's no fight left in me.

I've no more will to even try.

I've reached a point, where I can no longer see a reason why I should even continue to live.

I don't have anything left to live for.

Right this game is the reason I have to live, and ThingyChan, Outsidelane, Zutrix, NivanRavenBum and their 712 friends, have made it so I barely want to do that anymore.

ThingyChan, Outsidelane, Zutrix, NivanRavenBum they pretended to be my friends just so they could get information, to use to make jokes and memes. They were not friends. They were just evil bastards doing what evil bastards do best: comit evil acts.

Playing this game, used to bring some level of joy, but now it's just constant dread... 

Who's going to be pissed off today? 

How many death threats are going to be sent to me this stream?

You have no idea how much it meant to me, that ThingyChan said she was my friend. Or how big of a blow her deceitful betrayal was.    

She was the first and only friend I've ever had.

I thought I had finally found someone who cared, and she turned out to be just as evil as my uncles.

I tried turning chat back on October 7, 2019... and within minutes Zutrix arrived with death threats, brings others with them and chanting "Kill EelKat".... They did that for 3 days, and I turned chat back off again Oct 10.

I can't take it any more.

It's bad enough there is not one single person on this planet who loves me or cares about me, but the endless hundreds of people daily chanting they wish I was dead is too much.

You want to talk to me? You want to be my friend? Then fucking PROVE IT! 

#STOP BEING A SELFISH FUCKING DICK!

ACTUALLY talk to me.

ACTUALLY be my friend.

Stop being a fucking jackass leech only hanging around because you want something from me.

#THAT IS WHY CHAT IS TURNED OFF.

...............................................

#UPDATED TO ANSWER VIEWER QUESTION: I just realized who you are. I remember the news reports. You're that poltergeist child aren't you? The one they called Etiole's Friend.

[Etiole](https://www.eelkat.com/AmphibiousAliens.html)

Yes.

Etiole's friend.

Etiole.

The one thing that team of psychologists, psychiatrists, and social workers could not explain, nor could agree on.

The thing that scares everyone.

My ability to call up a being made of blinding white light and send him anywhere, to find anyone, and kill them.

To date more 370 people have been killed by Etiole since the FBI raid in 1997... 

...40 have been killed since the kidnapping and murder of 10 members of my family on April 10, 2015.... including Dan Feeney's entire family.

Yep. EVERYONE in Dan Feeney's family is dead. All died the same day. Freak accident. House was hit by lightening. 9 times. Killed everyone inside. 

Who was it again, that kidnapped 12 members of my family and nailed the heads of 10 of them to my door?

...let me think... oh yeah... it was Dan Feeney.

Funny how the man who killed everyone in my family, saw his entire family die from a freak lightning strike.

What goes around comes around.

Do unto me as you want me to do until you.

Oh yeah... you remember that district attorney who got Dan Feeney off on a technicality? His heart exploded. He's dead too.

Karma's a bitch.

Especially when you are dealing with a Voodoo Priestess that happens to have a Grigori archangel as her pet familiar that she can just send out whenever, wherever, after whoever, and has no issues with casting death spells.

The others in that 40, ALL died from heart attacks, brain aneurysms, and being hit by lightning.

Including a certain backhoe driver, who had a massive heart attack, quintuple bypass surgery, now has a pacemaker, and is not expected to live another 2 years.... oh my... look at that... the 7 year anniversary of April 10, 2015, is just exactly 2 years away. Would've thunk?

Tsk. Tsk. Tsk.

Oh... me thinks, they maybe should have done their research a little bit better and Googled me before they attacked me or my family... or better yet, they should have Googled Etiole.

An Avenging Angel. They are the bloodiest, most brutal, and least forgiving of any type of angel out their.

The Grigori Angels.

Seraphim who lost their wings, were cast onto Earth, and are called Alfar by some, Daemons by others, Faeries elsewhere... the Bible calls them The watchers... creatures who branded themselves the protectors of women and children, and when called upon, enact vengeance for wrongdoing.

Etiole showed up in my life September 23, 1978, and he answers my call every time since. Killing everyone whom has ever hurt me.

And every one of them, dies on the 7th anniversary of the crime they committed.

No one mourns David Henry Atwater, Richard Merlin Atwater, Mervin Bruce Atwater, or no one especially mourns Dan Feeney

My grandmothers, both Voodoo Priestesses, taught me how to call up archangels when I was just 3 years old.

And the angel who answered my screams for help, was Etiole.

The psychologists, psychiatrists, and social workers, found themselves alarmed by the consistency of one thing found in every interview with all of the uncles, cousins, and my mother... more than 400 adults all swore they had seen with their own 2 eyes - Etiole.

They also all claimed he lived in a car: a 1964 Dodge 330.

Since 2007, 30,000+ psychologists, psychiatrists, social workers, pseudo-scientists, MUFON members, conspiracy theorists, college students, and researchers have come to my farm, to see the car, study the swamp, and attempt to photograph Etiole.

No one has a definitive answer for what he is, though to date, more than 7,000 of them claim to have seen him.

Some call him an EBE.

Most call him an Amphibious Alien.

Others call him a White Reptilian Draconian 

The Atwaters and Cyrs firmly believe he is a demon.

Most of the psychologists and psychologists call him a "true poltergeist: a physical manifestation of an abused child's psychokinetic energy that kills her abusers with a terrifying force"Etiole is the Jewish Archangel otherwise known as The Archangel Etreal an Avenging Angel, Protector of the Innocent. He appears in the Christian Bible in the story of Lot and is the Angel of Justice and Retribution who rained brimstone and fire on the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah. He is one of The Grigori.

Known as The Grigori aka The Fallen Angels, The Alfar are the archangels who had their wings cut off and were cast out of heaven forced to live on earth with the humans.

To further punish The Alfar, Archangels Michael, Uriel, and Gabriel chained to the Alfar to millstones then forced them to watch while their human wives and Nephilim children were tortured to death.

The Alfar branded themselves the protectors of humans, especial pregnant women and children.

However, some Alfar fell astray even father, mutating themselves into Daemons, they became obsessed with resurrecting their dead wives and Nephilim children, and took to abducting pregnant women at night, using them in blood rituals under the command of their leader Beelzebub.

The Alfar divided into 2 factions:

* Dökkálfar aka The Dark Elves - black skinned Elves who rode on red dragons

* Ljósálfar aka The Light Elves - White skinned Elves who rode on white unicorns.

In Scandinavian folklore the Archangel Etreal is known also as The Fox aka Avallac'h.

Yeah, Etiole and Avallac'h are representations of the same person. Sheds some light on why I like Avallac'h so much, doesn't it?

I told you Avallac'h was a character from ancient folklore who was very important to me for more than 50 years.

...............................................

#UPDATED TO ANSWER VIEWER QUESTION: Wait. I'm looking at the dates here and the similarities of the events. Did Andrj Sapkowski base Ciri off of you and Avallac'h off of your uncles? Is that why you like Avallac'h so much?

Yes.

He did.

I contacted him and asked him. He said he was inspired by the news reports of the Gypies' baby breeding program and child prostitution ring that was all over the new in the late 1980s and throughout the 1990s.

The FBI raids started in 1987. Many of the fake adoption clinics were shut down in those early raids. There were 3 dozen more FBI raids across the country in Maine, Arizona, Nevada, Illinois, Colorado, Florida, Connecticut, Utah, Oregon, Vermont, and Wyoming throughout the 1990s and into the 2000's. Most of the 1990s raids focused on rescuing child prostitutes who were between the ages of 4 and 12 years old. In the mid-1990s more then 100 churches in Maine & Massachusetts were shut down by the FBI for holding young girls in their basements and selling 15 minutes of sex-time to the men of the congregations; and 3 times as many priests, mostly Catholics & Mormons, were arrested for their involvement in the sexual abuse of the children.

In total, from the first FBI raid in 1987, to the current FBI raids that continue to go on in 2020, more than 400 girls were rescued, nearly as many boys were rescued, 300+ priests have gone to prison, 14 compounds (breeding farms) have been shut down across the country, 6 of the worst clan leaders are dead,  and a grand total of more then 4,000 wealthy pedophile American white men have been arrested for paying to rape and sexual abuse children.

Not all of the compounds have been shut down. There were more then 70 total run by the Atwater Clan and the Cyr Clan claimed to have double that, plus the operation is run by the Cyrs, not the Atwaters, and the Cyrs have other clans working for them besides the Atwaters. The Atwaters had at minimum 1 compound in each of all 50 states, as well as several more in Canada. In Utah they had one compound per country. In Maine there were 4 compounds at one point, all but 1 are not shut down. 

Each compound has at minimum a dozen girls, the largest compound had 120 girls. 

All the girls start being sold for sex at the age of 4 and most are outright sold into slavery before they reach the age of 14 (usually leaving the compound to live with their owner, but sometimes, like in my case, the man buys the girl and then pays a lease for her to continue to be housed on the compound - this is generally done by business men, priests, and married men who don't want their employees, church congregation, or families knowing they buy humans and keep them as slaves)

Girls are generally considered unsellable and past their prime once they reach the age of 16. If the girl turns 16 before a man buys her, chances are very high she will not live to see her 17th birthday.

Sadly, the slave trade industry (also called Human trafficking industry) in America is bigger today than it was during the Civil War error of the old South, with the FBI estimating that there are more than 40million slaves in the United States.... the Atwater clan's operation, being only one of the thousands of similar child sex slave businesses run in America.

And, the Atwater clan's child prostitution ring is considered to be one of the smallest of such businesses because they never had more then 500 girls in their care at any given time, total across the country in all compounds; whereas others are known to keep that many girls per compound.

Most of these child prostitution rings are owned, run, and operated by Americans, and because Americans like to pat themselves on the back while pushing their own shit under the rug, the child prostitution rings run by them, rarely make news headlines.

The only reason the one I grew up in made news headlines is because it was NOT run by Americans, but was rather run by Gypsies, and Americans had to plaster their hatred for all things not American on every TV screen and newspaper, to make sure you didn't see the shit they pulled as well....

,,,by that I mean, there were only 8 Gypsy men and 3 Gypsy women involved in running the child prostitution ring. Yep, just 11 people.

...and more then 4,000 American white men, mostly Catholic and Mormon priests, where arrested, while all 11 of the Gypsies running the operation WERE NOT ARRESTED.

Why?

Bureaucratic red tape vs rape kit DNA. It took so long to file the paperwork to press charges and get warrants, that the 11 Gypsies who ran the child prostitution ring, slipped through the cracks and fled the country to seek immunity in Australia. 

And while red tape and paperwork filing time allowed the 11 Gypsies running the compound to escape.... rape kits and DNA testing allowed 4,000+ white American priests to be arrested and put in prison almost all the day week.

The news reports focused on 3 things:  

* look, we told you all Gypsies are evil and 

* look, we told you all Catholics are evil, and 

* hey yay America aren't we the greatest for putting an end to this.

In spite of news reporters focusing on Catholic priests, only around 300 of the priests arrested were Catholic while over 3,000 of the priests arrested were Mormons.... the TV reporters decided it would be more sensational to just say all 4,000 of the priests were Catholic and completely ignore the fact that very few of the priests were Catholic.

Likewise, tv reporters branded ALL Gypsies as baby kidnappers... when in fact it was only one and only 11 Gypsies involved... and kidnapping was NOT even involved at all, as ALL of these children, were the children and grandchildren and great grandchildren of those 11 Gypsies.

The fact that more then 40million American children are still today in slavery situations in America, all of them in compounds owned by WHITE AMERICANS, and nearly twice as many American men are estimated to pay underground groups for sex with 5 year olds was completely ignored by the tv reporters and was never once mentioned by any of them at all.

The irony is that while it received way too much more media attention then it deserved

The tv reports blew the whole thing out of proportion, trying to lay all the blame on Gypsy cultures as a whole, when in fact, this one operation was very tiny, and the Gypsy men who started it, started it after taking a trip to Las Vegas and discovering that the largest industry in Las Vegas was not casinos, gambling, or strip clubs, but rather underground child prostitution rings.

The men who start the compounds did so on the logic of: "Well if Americans can make that much money selling their children for sex, we can do it too."

Child prostitution remains to this day the largest underground big business for white Americans... bringing in more money than drugs, guns, and more traditional adult prostitution combined.

Sadly, the news media narrow focused in on 11 Gypsies and blew the whole thing out of proportion, with very little accurate information being given to the general public.

I say sadly, because this has resulted in a huge boom in anti-Gypsy propaganda, when this sort of thing is not normally a part of Gypsy culture, and while the focus is fully on "look how bad Gypsies are", the tens of millions of children, still locked in cages owned by white Americans are being completely ignored because news media has to scream: 

#"Praise America, hey look, go attack the non-white guy that's doing a little crime, so you don't see the bigger shit we white Americans are shoving behind Oz's curtain"

While it's great that most of the Gypsy run child prostitution rings are now shut down, the way the media blew things out of proportion, has caused hundreds completely innocent Gypsy families across the ENTIRE PLANET NOT JUST IN AMERICA, to see their children confiscated by social services for no reason at all other then: "you are Gypsy, you have 12 children, therefore you must be selling them for sex"...

...while tens of millions of child sex slaves continue to go on being tortured by their American owners, who are getting away with it because they has white skin and they are American, so therefor they can do no evil.

And people like ThingyChan, who make vile memes and jokes about these child sex slaves, making them out to be willing participants of the hell they live in by calling them BDSM dominatrixes, are exactly why more people DON'T do anything to help rescue these children.

Vile women like her who can make sick sex jokes about that kind of shit are what's wrong with society today.

Until people STOP acting like ThingyChan, and STOP making memes and jokes about this horrendous child porn industry, we are never going to see enough people rise up to stop child porn once and for all.

#I don't know who is more vile: 

* the men who sell the children,

*  the men who buy the children, 

* or jackasses like ThingyChan who make fun of the children for the sake of getting views.

I am tired of people like ThingyChan who are drawn to other people's misfortune and think getting a laugh out of the pain and suffering of others is good fun.

Claudia is not the first sick ass, cold, heartless bully to do this, she's just the first one who pretended to be my friend while they did it....for 2 fucking years... laughing and joking with her friends Outsidelane, Zutrix, and Niv, while lying about me and telling them I was a dominatrix BDSM fetish freak! She took horrific sexual torture from my childhood and made filthy slanderous lies about my current sex life... and she did it on a daily basis for 2 damned fucking years, while pretending to be my friend the whole time and continually asking for more info about my childhood, I thought because she cared, and now I find out she was just gleaning for information she could use to make sex jokes and memes about, the fucking backstabbing bitch!

Be sure your sin will find you out. How long did she think she could hide what she was dong from me? Vile, disgusting backstabbing bitch from hell.

And she's so evil, she can't, won't, even apologize. That's how evil a bitch she is.

Can't apologize... that make her more vile, more evil, then a rapist and murderer combined.

Refuses to apologize. Well we all know what the Bible has to say about that. Her eternity in Hell will be greater then all the Hells of all the abusers, liars, rapists, and murders combined.

There is nothing Jesus hates more than someone who refuses to repeat of their sins and forgiveness.

Refusal to apologize. It's the worst sin of them all, according to Jesus.

Unapologetic. There is nothing more evil then that.

I am horrific that someone could be so cruel, so heartless, so cold, so unfeeling, so sadistic, that they would find the kind of hell I grew up with to be something they can make jokes about.

And then take that vile, evil, crue, cold hearted bastard and have them be so deviated, so twiisted, so sadistic, so mentally deranged, so sick in the head, that they seek out the person that was hurt, to pretend to befriend them, out of sick deviated pleasure to watch them be hurt even more by your own hands.

What kind of a psychopathic sociopath does something like that? Why would you do something like that? What the fuck is wrong with her?

I am so damned sick and tired of people taking vile, horrific events from my childhood and making fun of it like it was some fucking joke.

Tens of thousands of news reports about this supposedly "massive" Gypsy baby breeding/child prostitution (so called "Scottish Mafia Crime Family" as the media often call it) ring have been circulated around the world in the 3 decades since the FBI raids started, and Andrzej Sapkowski is not the first, nor will he be the last, person to take elements of my childhood and write a fictionalized version of it.

And while I'm known to be very vocal in my absolute total outrage against people capitalizing on the hellish abuse me and many other children lived through... Andrzej Sapkowski stands out as one of the rare few who I not only don't hate, but actually liked how he handled what he wrote.

Andrzej Sapkowski kept a lot of details of the real life events virtually unchanged. The bodies on the ravine for example. In real life there were 31 bodies The Goosefare Brooke Ravine, in The Reclaim Blueberry Plains, in The Ross Forest, of Old Orchard Beach, Maine, and in the novel Lady of the Lake he changed it to tens of thousands of bodies in the ravine.

Ciri was 12 when Avallac'h took over her life and started breeding her to other men.

I was 12 when Ben took over my life and bought exclusive rights to be my only breeder, not allowing other men access to me after that.

And then of course there's me, Etiole's friend, the poltergeist telekinetic and psychokinetic abilities that result in everyone being scared shitless of me and wanting to study me.

Verses Ciri the girl with telekinetic and psychokinetic abilities that result in everyone being scared shitless of me and wanting to study me.

The big, notable differences are primarily in the living conditions.

Avallac'h kept Ciri and the other girls in his care in a palace, made her Queen of Avalon, practically worshiped her while treating her like royalty. Avallac'h never hurt the girls and he killed anyone who did. He was very protective of them and took very good care of them.

In real life we "breeders" were locked in cages, went weeks between meals, slept in our own feces, many starved to death before they were 10 years old, others were beaten to death. 

Avallac'h was fierce in his protection of babies. He was brutal with anyone who dared hurt a baby. Abhorred abortion.

In real life, the uncles who ran the clan, thought nothing of beating a pregnant child until her belly popped and the splattered remains of the baby burst out. They thought it was funny. They'd laugh and joke about it and call us "pinatas" and gamble money to see who would be the one to burst our pregnant bellies open first.

Avallac'h actually wanted a baby. His Lara Dorren wife died when she was 8 months pregnant with another man's baby and he promised to raise the child, but lost it. His mind fell apart and he became obsessed with babies. Ciri looked like Lara to the point that he refused to believe she was not Lara and demanded she get pregnant by another man, so he pick up where he left off, raising the family he had lost: Lara and her illegitimate baby. Avallac'h loved Lara and he loved the baby. He was devastated by their lost and was trying desperately to bring them back.

In real life, the uncles didn't give a shit about the children or rape babies of those children. We just dollar signs, easily expandable when we were no longer useful for bringing in more cash.

Avallac'h was every bit as kind and loving to the girls in his care as the uncles were brutal and cruel to the girls in their care. 

Avallac'h wanted a family. The uncles wanted money. 

Ciri and the other girls lived in the lap of luxury in Avallac'h's palace harem. We starved to death in cages and fought rats for scraps of rotted maggot filled food.

Avallac'h loved Ciri and the other girls in his care. He never hurt them and he fiercely protected them. The uncles justified the torture, abuse, and outright murder of the girls in their care by dehumanizing us, stripping us of dignity, and convincing themselves what they did was okay because we were "not human" but rather "just demons".

Yes, Avallac'h's being heavily influenced by the real world events from my childhood, is why I like him, because he's what the uncles SHOULD have been.

The thing I don't like is how Andre Sapkowski handled writing ciri, portraying her as a sex crazed trashy whore, constantly ripping off her panties, masterbating for the reader every 5 pages, and shoving her naked ass in the face of every man she meets.

He wrote 12 year old Ciri as a horndog, lustful, sex crazed slut who was ready to jump in bed with everyone because she just plain wanted sex every 5 minutes of the day.

In reality, we REAL 12 year old girls fought the men every step of the way, biting, kicking, clawing, and often castrating, the men ho were raping us. Not one of us 12 year old girls WANTED sex. Every chance we got we would grab hold of knives and hack and slash you way through the men, then run hoping to escape.

His writing Ciri as a sex crazed 12 year old loving every minute of being a child prostitute in Avallac'h's baby breeding program, was HUGELY inaccurate to how real world 12 year olds act in REAL world baby breeding programs.

We see 8 different scenes of 12 year old Ciri, angry and enraged because her breeder, King Auberon, refused to have sex with her and wanted to wait until she was older. In each scene we see 12 year old Ciri, smashing furniture, breaking mirrors, stomping her feet, throwing herself on the flooring holding her breath, and screaming at the top of her lungs "AUBERON WON'T GIVE ME AN ORGASM".

In the rape scene on page 179, we see 12 year old Ciri at her sex crazed worst, when she viciously attacks Avallac'h raping and then castrating him, while screaming "MAKE ME PREGNANT RIGHT NOW!"

Real world 12 year old girls DO NOT ACT LIKE THIS in these situations.

I can't identify with Ciri, even though she lives through many near identical events that I lived through (including the beheading torture of my best friends, which happened when I was 14, vs Mistle's beheading which happened when Ciri was 12), which should make me be able to identify with her, because I have first hand experience with being tortured in exactly the same way Leo and Vilgizfort's tortured Ciri... but Ciri does not have realistic, relatable responses to these events.

Unfortunately, because of how he portrayed Ciri in the sex scenes with King Auberon, and he nullified, numb reactions to Mistle's beheading, alongside her steady, constant, non-stop demands for sex.... I feel that Andrzej Sapkowski, wanted to be one of the American men with enough money to pay to rape us girls. That's how the Witcher novels read.

Andrzej Sapkowski's writing, glamorizes, glorifies, sexualizes, and turned into child porn Erotica, some of the worst cases of real world child abuse in American history.

It is clear that Andrzej Sapkowski is drooling with lust for Ciri's 12 year old vagina, with every line he writes of her furiously masterbating for King Auberon.

It is clear that if Andrzej Sapkowski had lived in America and had had $20,000 to spend, he would have been first in line to rape a 12 year old Gypsy girl....

...and because of that... the Witcher novels horrify me.

Yes, I like the Witcher novels, but I don't recommend them. Why? You need to remember one thing: 

Not every priest involved in the child prostitution ring has been arrested.

You remember the high priest from Austria?

Yeah.

You see him in my streams, every week.

Ben.

The power of an apology.

You remember how I said ThingyChan was a worse piece of shit then my uncles were because SHE REFUSES TO APOLOGIZE for the crap she pulled?

Unlike the other priests, unlike my uncles, unlike the rest of the men... Ben was never arrested, nor will he be... because he said was sorry for what he did.

He apologized.

The power of an apology... that's what kept him out of prison, while 4,000 pedophile priests are now behind bars.

On top of that, Ben and I are now a couple and have been together for 32 years.

Officially, I am diagnosed with Stockholm Syndrome, because of my absolute refusal to turn Ben over, like I did the rest.

And he did buy me when I was 12, so technically, he stills owns me, and while my uncles were abusive, Ben wasn't. He's never hit me. I don't believe he would. He probably scare himself if he did.

Not many men are able to gain respect from their women. Too many men buy us because they just want sex and something to beat on when they get drunk. Ben's not like that. He's rather unique.

I'm quite lucky.

Not many women get bought by a man who is not abusive.

Compared to the other girls who grew up with what I did, I came to a fairly good end.

Most girls will get bought by a man who is going to beat them to death before they are 20 years old.

It' rare to see a female Gypsy over the age of 30 and that's why.

Unfortunatly, most men in Gypsy culture, see women as a type of livestock.

We get bought and sold all the time.

A lot of Gypsy women live in fear that the man who owns them, will get bored with them and sell them to a man even worse.

Others hope the man who owns them, will get bored with them and hopeful sell them to a man who is better.

A man like Avallac'h, one who doesn't beat his women, and treats them with kindness... most Gypsy women don't even dare dream of being owned by someone like that. Men like that are just so rare.

Yeah, I like the Witcher novels, because segments of them, the parts with Avallac'h, were based off of real world events from my childhood and I have Stockholm Syndrome.

I have an extreme obsession with shutting down, every last child prostitution ring in the clan, and hunting down every last man involved in it and putting them all in prison.

The last 30 years of my life have been fully 100% devoted to that goal.

And over the course of carrying out that goal, I started collecting every last bit of media about my childhood.

You see, I am utterly fascinated, with the fact that so many people are fascinated by my childhood.

And am left to wonder, why, when so many millions, upon millions, upon countless millions of people publicly, in newspapers, on TV news reports, in online forums, authors of novels, writers of movies... all CLAIM to to be horrified by my childhood, and many of them, hundreds of locals, all CLAIM, that any one of them would have come to our rescue... then why the hell, did not one of them, ever do so?

One of my brothers escaped, made it to a near by church, and begged the bishop for help, told the bishop what was happening... and Bishop Dan Kenning, took him back "home" and recommended to my parents and the uncles, that he be punish for "telling such a whopper"... oh he was punished alright... and he hasn't said a word in the 30 years since... yeah... my brother who doesn't talk.

In the 1980s we were let out once a week, for 3 hours to go to church. During that 8 year period, I reported what was happening to 16 bishops, 3 town managers, 32 town councilman, and 24 police officers, all of Old Orchard Beach, all of whom were members of that church. I even gave them the address 37 Smithwheel Rd as the location ... yeah IN FUCKING 1988!!!!! 

#THINK ABOUT THAT!

37 Smithwheel Rd, Old Orchard Beach, Maine.... in 1988: 24 police officers, 16 bishops, 3 town managers, 32 town councilman, HAD ALL BEEN GIVEN REPORTS that children were being bought and sold

24 police officers KNEW about 37 Smithwheel Rd in damned fucking 1988!

#SHOVE THAT UP YOUR DAMNED NEWS REPORTS!

Hundreds of locals, INCLUDING ALL 24 OF THOSE POLICE OFFICERS, all CLAIM, that any one of them would have come to our rescue... HAD THEY KNOWN WHAT WAS HAPPENING.... and yet, I know of more then 40 different children, who during those 3 hour Sunday services outside of our cages DID MAKE REPORTS OF WHAT WAS HAPPENING.... 

I am so damned sick of bastards who what to look good in public, but don't give a shit about doing good deeds... THEY FUCKING KNEW what was happening, 40+ children, begged them for help, half those children were DEAD YEARS before help came.... they claim they would have helped us? Well then why the hell, did not one of them, ever do so?

They only said for news cameras, that they would have helped had they'd known, because they wanted to make themselves look good to others, they didn't give a shit about helping us. 

They didn't care, they didn't even believe us.

And THAT'S why I like the Witcher novels.

Not for Geralt.

Not for Dandelion.

Not for Yennefer.

Not for Triss.

Not even for Ciri.

Just for 3 chapters. 32 pages. The 32 pages that were based off my childhood.

I am utterly fascinated, with the fact that so many people are fascinated by my childhood... and I collect EVERYTHING, that anyone writes about those events, be they news reports in the Boston Globe, or fiction in a Polish Fantasy fanzine magazine.

I can't stand Geralt or Dandelion.

Both of them are the type of men who'd be waving $20,000 in the air and fighting to be first in line to rape a 12 year old.

Geralt and Dandelion are vile, perverted men, who if they were real, would be in prison where men like them belong. I deeply dislike that so many millions of people glorify Geralt and Dandelion, because vile, perverted, pedophile, rapists should never be glorified.

It's terrifying to look at today's society, and the wild craze of Geralt and Dandelion fans who flock to these vile, sexually devated, immoral men who take sexual advantage of women.

I do like Yennefer and can see her as a hero. She's a strong woman who fought against some terrible odds that life dealt her, and she adopted Ciri, and raised her when no one else would.

Like Avallac'h, Yennefer was kind and gentle and loving to Ciri. I like Yennefer for the same reason I like Avallac'h.

Though I also think Yennefer is kind of stupid. Geralt uses and abuses her something fierce, He's mean to her all the time. He outright admits he doesn't give a shit about her feelings and is going to fuck every woman he sees wither she likes it or not. She can do better. She deserves better. But in spite of how big of a dick he is to her, she stands by him, her heart breaking, knowing he'll never love her, never care about her, and will quickly toss her out of bed the first sight of a brothel.

Triss. I loath. More than any other character. She's an absolute total whore. Deviated sex crazed bitch who's doesn't give a shit about Geralt, but hates Yennefer so will stop at nothing to shove her ass in Geralt's face as much as possible just to spite Yennefer. A piece of trash not worth the bullet it would take to shoot her and rid the world of her slutty ass.

Ciri.... I wanted to like Ciri. o much of her life was based off of real world events that happened to me in my childhood.... but, Ciri's slut assed whoness make Triss look like a sainted Vestal Virgin. And believe me... that is NOT how a real world 12 year old acts. Not even close.

Sadly Andrzej Sapkowski did what the bulk of people fascinated by my childhood do... fetishized it, sexualized horrific child abuse into child porn erotic sex fantasies.

It horrifies me that Andrzej Sapkowski had the opportunity to take these horrific real world events and show them through Ciri's eyes.... ad instead of showing the world how vile, evil, and horrible those events were, how traumatizing the real girls involved were by what happened to them.... instead, he showed Ciri as a female version of Dandelion, slobbering in sex crazed lust for every penis she saw. (I'm still wondering how readers call Ciri's penis lust crazed obsession "lesbianism").

:(

It saddens me to no end, to see Avallac'h tell Ciri she's to have sex with King Auberon, and Ciri's response is to light up in joyful glee and say "Oh boy! You mean I get to have sex with the Alder King?"

A REAL 12 year old is going to run screaming from that situation. Not sex crazed penis lusting 12 year old Ciri. She joyfully and giddily ran all yippie skippies to jump in bed with the King, only to be enraged when the King is horrified to find out she's still a child and refuses to have sex with her, in spite of Avallac'h's insistence that Ciri has perfectly ripe ovaries at 12 years old.

And, while Avallac'h is initially unfazed by the thought of 12 year old Ciri having sex with 400 year old King Auberon... he backs off, changes his mind and tells Ciri to spend a few years enjoying living with the Elves instead, have a baby later when you're an adult.... and that just enrages 12 year old Ciri who decides to brutally and violently rape Avallac'h while screaming: "MAKE ME PREGNANT RIGHT NOW!"

Yeah... how many 12 year old girls do you know who do that?

Like I said, I wanted to like Ciri.

Every other page of Ciri's life, is ripped right out of the news reports of my life, so you'd think I could identify with her.

The problem is, I know what it is like to be in those situations and I know how I felt, and my reactions to those exact same situations was completely the polar opposite of Ciri's reactions in those situations, making her reactions unbelievable and alien to me, resulting in  simply can not identify with her.

I don't like the Witcher novels for the story.

I like them, for Avallac'h and Avallac'h alone.

There isn't anything else in the Witcher novels that I like.

The bulk of the Witcher novels are just endless immorality, prevention, and sex, and I don't like any of that.

I don't like anything in the Witcher novels that involves Geralt.

While I liked Geralt in the game... I absolutely loathe Geralt in the novels. He is vile on levels of vileness I don't even want anything to do with. After finding out how revolting, immoral, sexully deviated, and disgusting he was in the novels, I couldn't remove him from the game fast enough.

And you do have to remember, that I ONLY READ THE WITCHER NOVELS BECAUSE I WAS CONTACTED BY SOMEONE FAMILIAR WITH THE FBI CASE AND THEY ASKED ME TO READ THE NOVELS BECAUSE THEY WERE AFRAID SOMEONE INSIDE THE CASE HAD LEAKED INFORMATION TO THE PUBLIC.....

Yeah.... I was asked to read the Witcher novels to see if I thought Andrzej Sapkowski was one of the men who had been raping the little girls BECAUSE HE HAD SO MANY DETAILS RIGHT about the FBI investigation.

I do not like Fantasy novels.

I do not read Fantasy novels.

I only read the Witcher novels because information in the novels matched information in a murder investigation and they wanted to know if I thought he could have gotten his details THAT ACCURATE from just reading news reports or could he have been one of the men involved.

I never would have read the Witcher novels otherwise as they are not the types of books I normally read.

I did not go into reading the Witcher novels looking to have a fun time reading Fantasy.

I went into the Witcher novels with a fine tooth comb looking for the supposed connections it had to the murder trail I was involved in, because the question had been brought up.... do we need to contact this author and bring him into this court trail over the fact that he used so many details from the lives of these real people from a currently active murder investigation?

I went into reading the Witcher novels as research for writing up court documents, to see did he just read the news reports or was their info that he used that was not released to the public.

And no, everything he used in the novels, can be found in news reports, no evidence was found that he had any connection to the case outside of seeing news reports and being inspired to add those details to his novels.

And yes, that is how I got so obsessed with playing the game as well.

While I had played all 3 games previously, it was not until lawyers started suggesting many aspects were based off on news reports of my childhood, that I began replaying the game over and over, searching through every last inch of it to find out, just how far they dug into those news reports and how much did they use.

I don't understand why so many people have such a hard time believing it, but Avallac'h really is the ONLY thing I like about the Witcher novels.

Which I know is odd, given he's supposed to be partly based off the real world men who abused me, but like I said... he's so very different from the real world men he was based on: my uncles.

We real girls starved to death in cages, sleeping in feces. There were no lights. Total darkness in that room 24 hours a day for weeks on end, in total solitary confinement. And once the weekly outings to church stopped.... it was sometimes 6 months or more, between going outside of the cage, outside of that room (which, if you can stomach it... there are picture of, lower down on my profile... most people tell me they can't even look at the pictures of that room as it turns their stomach to see what I lived in for 27 years). The door to the room opened once every other week - to toss food scraps at me - a handful of food once every 12 days. No light. No one else in the room. Total solitary confinement. That was my punishment for asking the bishop for help one Sunday, the last Sunday I was ever allowed in church. I was starving to death, in pitch blackness, sleeping in feces, going month between hearing another person's voice.... that's the reality of that room, and what it was like to be a child in a child prostitution ring, who dared fight back and tried to escape to get help.

Ciri grew fat on pastries and slept in a bed covered with red silk and mink furs, with Avallac'h while he sang to her.... had our REAL WORLD experience in a child prostitution breeding program been like THAT, I doubt any of us would have tried to escape. Avallac'h and how he treated Ciri was a HUGE far cry from how real men running such a place treated the REAL child prostitutes.

Though we at 5 years old did get to wear sequin pageant dresses that outshine prom dresses, we only got to bath and wear those if a man paid to let us out of the cages to be raped by him. That was a mixture of excitement and dread... excited to finally get to wear clothes and look pretty, followed by the dread of why we were being dressed up like little 5 year old Barbie dolls.

Had we had someone like Avallac'h raising us. A kind, gentle, loving man who actually cared about and took good care of the girls in his care, our lives would have been very different. 

We girls, we needed someone like Avallac'h. A man who didn't beat us, didn't starve us, didn't lock us in cages, didn't torture us. We didn't have the lap of luxury that Ciri had. We were unloved, unwanted, beaten, tortured, caged, abused, starved, our unborn babies murdered. 

At 8 years old, we lived in total dread of giving birth to a female baby, because that meant having our stomachs crushed, our bones broken, to punish us for the sin of not giving birth to blue eyed blond boys that could be sold to wealthy Americans.

And had I grown up in different circumstances, I doubt I'd like the Witcher novels at all. Yeah... I like Avallac'h because he represents what our childhoods could have been. And that's the single, solitary, ONLY reason I like the Witcher series. Because I wish we'd been raised by a kind, gentle man like Avallac'h, a man who would not have killed our babies or starved us or beaten us or caged us. We needed a man like him who cared about us and didn't just see us as a means of making money.

And yeah, I do hate Ciri because she's an ungrateful bitch. There isn't a one of us girls who wouldn't have killed to be owned by a man like Avallac'h.

The men who owned us treated us like shit. Ciri is an ungrateful little bitch. She don't know how good she had it.

Most girls grow up dreading the man who will own them.

We get bought and sold by abusive bastards all the time.

Men don't care about the girls they buy. They care even less about us once we are adults.

Do you have any idea how rare it is to be bought by a man who is NOT going to treat you like shit. Who is NOT going to beat you?

It rare. It's very, very, very RARE.

Men are mean.

Men are cruel.

It is every girl's dream to be bought by a man WHO WILL NOT BEAT HER.

It is every girl's dream to be bought by a man WHO WILL NOT KILL HER BABIES.

It is every girl's dream to be bought by a man WHO WILL NOT PUT HER IN A CAGE.

Do you know what it is like to dream about being owned by someone who actually cares about you?

Avallac'h not only cared about her... he let her go outside!

Do you know how rare it is to be bought by a man who will let you go outside?

Ciri is a vile piece of shit. She had what every single girl dreams of having, and she destroyed it.

That's why I don't like Ciri. I'd kill to have the type of freedom she had. And she threw it away.

I think that's why I am in such awe over what ThingyChan did... it looks like, sees 24 years old, and no one seems to own her.

I don't know what the culture she is like is from, but it's bizarre to see a female run wild with sex talk like she does. Clearly she has no father, brother, male cousins, uncles, or a husband to beat her in the face with a brick and teach her some manners and decency.

I never trust wild women. I didn't realize she was one. Though that does explain quite a lot.

Her ill manners.

Her refusal to apologize for being a vile piece of shit and spreading all those slanderous BDSM fetish sex lies about me.

Clearly she is desperately in need of a man to take a brick to her head and put her in lie. No woman in Gypsy culture would dare talk about the vile, perverted BDSM sex talk she was saying about me, that's for sure. No man would let them talk like that.

I don't know... Americans like to talk about giving women more rights, but if ThingyChan is any example of what women are like when they don't have a man to keep them in line, I'm not sure I would want women having more rights. 

She's hurting a lot of people, and if she does have a man who owns her, he's certainly not doing his job, that's for sure.  A man who can't keep his women in check is just as bad as a man who abuses his women.

After seeing what she did, I think of ThingyChan as being like a wild rabid dog. A dog with a good owner, knows manners and respect and doesn't jump all over people who visit. A dog with a bad owner, runs and hide. While a dog with no owner runs around pissing on every corner and biting everyone. ThingyChan is like the dog with no owner, running around pissing on the corners of Discord and biting everyone she meets because she has no man to teach her otherwise, no firm hand to reign her in and make her behave. And, like any wild woman with no owner, she will continue to run wild, hurting people until a man steps into her life and teaches her some manners and dignity.

It's rather sad, really, when you stop and think about it... at 24 years old and no one has bought her yet? She's an old maid with no hope of ever being bought. Men don't pay good money for a 24 year old dried old prune. What viability does she have of giving birth to healthy babies at that age! 

Perhaps that's why she's so mean? I've seen that before. Not getting picked. It's generally considered quite bad if you reach the age of 16 and no man's bought you yet. That's almost as bad as reaching 14 with anything fewer the 4 babies.

24 years old, no children, no man, unbought, unloved, unpicked, unwanted, 10 years past her prime. No wonder she's so mean.

I could almost feel sorry for her, if she hadn't launched a 2 year long attack on my reputation, maliciously spreading hateful, slanderous sex lies about me behind my back while pretending to be my best friend the entire time she did it.


>>>I think it came out well. My writing experience has been very different.

STILL think you're experiences are so vastly different from the norm?

NOW, what was it you said again?

>>>I think it came out well. My writing experience has been very different.

How?

You say it is different, but is it.

I can guarantee MINE is different. But are YOU, really so different than you think. You say nothing to support this, and I'm left to wonder, why you feel different, when chances are high you are not.

You might want to rethink how different your experiences are, because your talking to someone who has ACTUAL different experiences, and can PROVE it.

PROVE your experiences are different from the norm and that's you're not just a whinny, annoying, spoiled, teenaged brat.

>>>People don't even know my background.

Only because you didn't tell them your background.

But did you consider, that you also don't know THEIR backgrounds and YOU are in fact judging them, just as much as they judged you.

>>>People don't even know my background.

You know mine now.

It's in your hands now to tell me yours.

>>>But anything can be improved..

Yes it can.

Keep telling yourself that and you might just one day believe it enough to stop writing emails like this which prove you don't believe it to be true.

>>>I truly believed it was in a good state overall, from a story perspective. But now since time has passed and from the feedback I've gotten, I've ideas to make it better but that's only natural.

.

From what you've said others have said, it sounds like the story is NOT the problem, the grammar is the problem, and you are too dense, arrogant, and egomaniacal to actually LISTEN to what they are saying.

Just take their advice and fix the shitty ass illiterate grammar and your story will be publishable.

>>>Also, I got into writing pretty past, and wrote it fast, and submitted it. I never knew about a lot of stuff. It all hit me like a train. And honestly, I'm happy for it. I see so many people stuck in stuff and questioning that do they have to follow this rule or that... I was free of it all..

Have you ever seen someone hit by a train? I have. I think you might want to use a different example. You kind of make yourself look retarded when you say things like that, so again, it's no wonder a TOR editor called you illiterate. You kind of are.

>>> I see so many people stuck in stuff and questioning that do they have to follow this rule or that... I was free of it all..

You most certainly are. You can't write grammar worth shit and you'll never be published because of it. But you are free of rules, that's for sure, and you look like a retarded, self-righteous brat because of it, but you have fun with that.

The rest of us writers, we know rules exist for a reason and we will continue to publish dozens of novels and you will continue to roll around in your own grammarless filth, complaining that no one will publish you because you are too much of a genius to be understood.

Sooner or later you'll fall off that high horse and see yourself the way others do and you'll wonder why you wasted so much time being the village idiot.

>>>And maybe I've attained a bit of that curse now, but overall writing is free and that's how it should be..

You don't know what a curse is do you?

Have you really never read a dictionary?

It is so painfully obvious that you have no clue how to use words on even the most basic of levels, largely because there are so many words you don't know the meanings of.

You NEED an education, BADLY.

An uneducated mountain hillbillie from the Ozarks could write grammar better than you.

Stop sitting around bragging how great your art is and get an education.

There is a hell of a big difference between being a true artist, and being too lazy to learn even the basics.

>>>

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