IMPORTANT UPDATE:

Due to the murder of my family and the resulting court cases, police investigations, and FBI investigations, I no longer have time to daily update this website.

Likewise ALL novel, short story, and article writing projects are on hiatus.

All book releases, book signings, workshops, and convention appearances for 2015 (and unknown amount of time after) are on hold while the murder investigation of my family is ongoing.

Writing advice for the worldbuilding, character creation, and other writing how to articles are on hold.

From now on, the bulk of updates here will be about the investigation into the murder of my family.

No, NOT just THIS author website, not JUST the EelKat pename, not just self published books: ALL 15 (fifteen) of my penames are on hiatus, that includes traditional published books as well, newspaper reporting jobs, editing jobs, my work for Harlequin Romance Novels, my work for Disney... EVERYTHING is on hiatus. Every publishing house I work for, every series I write, every penname I write under: they are ALL on hiatus, ALL projects.

There is NOTHING being published under ANY penname, not for ANY series, not for ANY publisher, from 2015 onward. EVERYTHING is on hold due to the murder of my family. I do not know when or even if, any of the projects will be restarted or finished.

Yes, BOTH the magazines I owned are indefinitely shut down because of this as well, with no plans for either magazine to return. The publishing house I own is also closed to submissions from now on, we will no longer be publishing anything. It is unlikely we will reopen the publishing house either.

All book signing tours, workshops, letures, PAX events, ComicCon events, carnival/festival/state fair/car show events are also canceled. I will not be attending ANY of them. If a venue still has my name listed as a guest/speaker/etc it is because they've not yet removed it. I WILL NOT be there, no matter where it is! 

EVERYTHING, EVERYWHERE, IS CANCELED!

The ONLY thing continuing from this point on, is THIS website, where I'll post updates on the murder investigation, hopefully every week, but, you know how it is when 10 members of your family are beheaded, it's kind of difficult to have a schedule for anything anymore.

Writing Native Dialects or Kendra Silvermander on Reddit: Let's take a look at my stalker's posts on Reddit


By EelKat Wendy C Allen

She's back. And this time, Kendra Silvermander aka Tom Addams is on Reddit, using the id name: mike_m_ekim .

Here, have a read ...

What is Kendra talking about this time?

She's referencing this:

I would recommend you go to Amazon and look for self-published books on the art of Hoodoo, Rootwork, Creole Voodoo, and New Orleans Voodoo. Books written by two-headed conjuremen, rootdoctors, mambos, borkars, and houngans. Buy and read as many as possible.

Most of these are written in the Creole dialect; many are written by "mountain folk" authors who have little to no schooling and wrote the books phonetically. I know this because I am a Voodoo Priestess rank of Medsen Fey Marija Loa to Damballah Weddo. I make a habit of supporting my fellow hoodooers in their work by buying their books, thus I have read several dozen books that are written in the actual Creole language.

Reading how your language is written, when written by people for whom it is their native tongue, perhaps would help you to compare the differences in how it is written, with how American English is written.

I am Scottish and write my books in the native tongue of my people. Scotts English is very similar to Creole, because it was French Canadian Scotsmen who were teaching many of the slave to speak English. I have no trouble reading the Creole dialect because it is so similar to Scots English that there is very little difference at all.

As to if you should dumb down your native dialect to make the book more readable to the masses, it depends on where you market your book. I do not try to dumb it down for the America readers, if they can not understand it, well, that's their problem, not mine. Most of the world speaks 3 languages minimum and has no trouble with bi-lingual dialects. It's only Americans who speak 1 language and are baffled at how to read multi-lingual dialects. And Scottish English is a TYPE of English. It's not THAT different from American English. Imagine the trouble Americans would have with French or Latin - standard languages MOST of Europe knows.

American got high horse chips on their houlders - big ones. They hate everything and every one that is not them and they are not afraid to pull out their guns and brutally, violently, and bloodily attack you for something as petty as spelling colour with a "u" instead of color without a "u" they way they do. They are vicious, brutal, blood thirsty hate mongers, the Americans, just look at the posts you see written on Reddit. You can always tell an American from a non=American, by their levels of bitter troll fest snark filled hate. Americans can't even be friendly of act civilized on a forum. A complete lack of dignity or manners. They are rude, crude, and and very, very violent.

For decade my books have sold in Europe and Asia with no problem. No bitterness. No hate. No violence. My books went to the American mass market in September 2014. October 2014 I had 7 dump trucks arrive in my yard and dump mountains of garbage on my crops. A pile of garbage 175 feet long, 30 feet wide and 12 feet tall. THAT is what Americans do to authors who do not write in American English.

I've never had an Asian or European reader complain they had trouble reading my books. 80% of my sales are to Japan and Germany and France. On the other hand, 97% of all books sold to Americans, has been returned and I've gotten several hundred hate emails from American readers who do complain about the dialect of the Scottish Gypsy characters in my books....

ETA:

You can see one here on Reddit for yourself if you want to see the kind of hate emails I recieve on a daily basis: https://www.reddit.com/r/writing/comments/84p9fr/with_writing_advice_mention_whether_you_simply/

(Yes, to the people who have commented and asked what the OP was talking about, s/he was referencing one of my replies on Reddit last week, which mentioned using Scots English to write my books instead of translating my books to American; they are "spoofing" rewriting into gibberish, a post I wrote last week.) Waves to may stalker, glad to see your gibberish hasn't changed and you now have a Reddit account to harass me with.

- note -

  • she has 52 Amazon accounts and does this same thing in the reviews of my books on Amazon. 
  • She likewise posts these same gibberish posts on Kboards and NaNoWriMo forums. 
  • On Kboards she hacked my account and rewrote all 1,371 of my forum posts into that gibberish madness you see in that Reddit post there. 
  • She works overtime to write insanity like that. She's sent me 21,000 emails like that so far. 
  • She also built a bomb and blew up my house (2006), 
  • cut my car in half (2010), 
  • filled my motorhome with thousands of gallons of feces (2015), 
  • and cut my cats heads off and nailed them to my front door (2015). 

I'm not surprised to see her posting her usually raving mockery madness, making fun of my language and my people here on Reddit, she's already done it everywhere else. One might call her obsessed with me, though I'm not sure why.

If you know who this OP is, please call the FBI agent in charge of the attempted murder investigation:

Agent Andy Drewer @ 207-774-9322,

she's wanted for:

  • 20+ years of online stalking, 
  • offline stalking, 
  • building the bomb that blew up my house (2006), 
  • the bomb that was left in classroom at college (2013), 
  • the bomb that killed my doctor when it blew up his office on a day I was supposed to be there but am only alive because I got stuck in traffic and was 10 minutes late (2003), 
  • building the bombs that were put in my department where I work at WalMart (2016 & 2015), 
  • and cutting the head off my cousin. (2013) 
  • I've actually met her in person and know what she looks like, she attacked me at work with a shopping cart and ruptured 3 discs in my spine, left me paralyzed for 5 months and 18 months relearning to walk, and she talks in person EXACTLY the same raving madness she writes in these weird posts of her's. 

She's wanted by the FBI if you know who she is please turn her over because I have no idea who this woman is or why she is doing this.


Book publishing hiatus: November 14, 2013 I was beaten up by a woman who claimed to be a unpublished author. I was paralyzed for 5 months and am still 4 years later relearning to use my legs & arms. While I was cripple, offline, and recovering these past 4 years, she next proceeded to hack my website and most all of my forum and social network accounts.

April 2015 she returned, filled my motorhome with 1,000s of gallons of feces/raw sewage and cut my cats heads off nailing them to my door. 10 cats are currently still missing. 

October 2006 she blew up my house with a bomb, in May 2013 put a bomb in my classroom at college, November 2015 put a bomb in my department where I work at Walmart, and June 2016 put yet another bomb in WalMart. The FBI is trying to identity of this woman. More info about these terrorist attacks on my family can be found here: https://www.eelkat.com/1667Words.html

If you have any information about this woman, please contact the FBI agent in charge of the case, his contact info is on that page.


Have Information?

Call

FBI Agent

Andy Drewer

@ (207) 774-9322

So, if you want to write your native dialect, just know ahead of time that what is written in that Reddit post is the type of email you'll get from American readers. I get on average, 2,000 such emails EVERY DAY.

Just like THIS:

With writing advice, mention whether you simply want to give advice or want to receive comments on how you write advice. (self.writing)

submitted 5 hours ago by mike_m_ekim

You were inspired. You toiled away for countless hours, weaving fragments of plot with bits of character development. A story slowly grew in your mind and then on your laptop. You would have characters that seemed to no longer fill a purpose, when suddenly you had a plot element that needed a character. “That’s it laddie” you nearly shouted, fingers hovering half-curled over your keyboard. Thoughts raced as you felt the pieces fall in place. You imagined the same scenes over and over, making subtle changes with each iteration until they found consistency. “Now I know how they kill the English oppressors. And the old hags from the Highlands have a role to play in the climax. A role in the climax!”

Finally, plot assembled and characters grown, you began editing. The next morning you awoke to bagpipes sounding more melancholy than usual, and in your mind a character’s expression formed. The corners of her wee bonnie mouth pulled down, but also backward as if she were resisting the expression. It’s not exactly as if she wants to hide her sadness; it’s just that she’s with Frenchmen now (the Auld alliance!) and will wait to share her feelings when she’s with good equitable Scotts again.

But what if she was among the enemy? Would she try to force a smile first time, but fail and be mocked for it? Later, lesson learned, she will try the stone faced approach with better luck. In fact, she’ll be so good at it someone will accuse her of being heartless. And that’s good, she’s been unknowingly making tensions worse with the English oppressors, and the misunderstanding will fuel the fires of war. She’s a good lass, that one.

Later in the coffee shop you continue editing and you come upon a realization. You had been telling the reader she was sad, and later telling them that she was trying to hide her sadness. Now, after a bit of editing, you’re describing facial expressions and then describing how people react to her. In other words, you aren’t telling them how she feels and how she’s acting.

“You’re showing” the barista says after clearing her throat, cringing at your kilt. And she’s right.

You leer at her with a look that must surely reflect your newfound wisdom “Of course I’m showin yea. This way you figure out how she’s feeling on your own.”

As she wanders off in confusion you return to your laptop. Your story has to wait. It’s time to turn your newly enhanced writing talents to another job: writing some advice for the internet. With great power comes great responsibility, and it’s time your knowledge be meted. You craft a post somewhere between 2 and 20 paragraphs describing the importance of showing and not telling. Your post complete, you inhale while stretching in your chair. Yes, you’re definitely taller now.

But what did you want to accomplish from your post? Writing anything can be a good exercise. Writing an advice post is a good way to practice writing advice. But did you challenge yourself? Did you try to engage the reader, or inject some personality? You’re posting on a writing forum, so you might as well do something that possible on a writing forum full of people posting and reading advice: ask for comments on your advice. Perhaps not the nature of the advice itself, but how you wrote it.

As you are once again escorted from the coffee shop you see a puzzled young woman. You inquire, and she says she’s meeting friends at ‘Java and Journalists’ but they accidently got directions for ‘Essayists and Expressos’. She ask if you can tell them how to get there.

“I can do better than that” you say with a wise look in your eye. “Follow me. I can show you.”

And, like a Scotsman, you are true to his word.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I’m open to advice or criticism. Also, here’s a bit that I cut out of the middle. This bit of writing took me between 60 and 90 minutes to write (American time) and I didn’t take a lot of time to edit so hopefully it’s as coherent as I think.

Also, here’s a bit that I edited out to help with the flow:

You have reached the next level in your rise to world renowned author. First you overcame your fear of derivative writing. Then you learned to avoid changes between first and third person. You still struggle with passive voice but one day you’ll switch to a better word processor that will find them for you. None of that matters now. What matters is you’ve learned to show and not tell. It’s exactly like you read about on the internet but better, because now it’s real. It’s made you smarter, cleverer, and just a little taller than before.

With writing advice, mention whether you simply want to give advice or want to receive comments on how you write advice. (self.writing)

submitted 5 hours ago by mike_m_ekim

A year ago, you saw me make a vlog on this same subject, after she sent me an email titled: "Jesus Christ is Lord and Voodoo is Satanic". Here, go watch it for yourself...


THAT, is the type of email she sends me EVERY DAMNED DAY.

She's a raving lunatic, and now you've seen her madness for yourself.





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