Do Black Lives REALLY Matter
to the BLM Rioters?
No.
If Black Lives REALLY Mattered,
to the BLM Protesters,
they would stop and think
about the consequences their actions have...
UPDATE: June 24, 2020: Much sadness, the painting of Erzulie Danta aka The Black Madonna, one of Vudo's Primary Loas was destroyed by BLM vandals :( , she along with her sister Erzulie Freda are my patron saints.
Much sadness, the painting of Erzulie Danta aka The Black Madonna, one of Vudo's Primary Loas was destroyed by BLM vandals :( only 2 days after the destruction of Erzulie Freda aka Immaculate Conception, she along with her sister Erzulie Freda are my patron saints.
Erzulie Danta & Erzulie Freda are 2 of the primary Loa of Voodoo.
They are the 2 wives of Damballah Weddo, The One God, The Great Serpent, The Creator of Life.
White slave owners, would not allow black slaves to worship the Loa. Slave owners brought in Catholic Priests and Nuns to convert the slaves. The slaves took the icons, prayer cards, and paintings the priests and nuns gave them, and gave the Loa, "Catholic names"
Thus Damballah Weddo began to be represented by images of Moses carrying a Brass Serpent, and his wives Erzulie Danta & Erzulie Freda began to be represented by The Black Madonna and The Lady of The Immaculate Conception.
All of the Loa, have Catholic Saints and Martyrs to represent them. It was a way for the slaves to trick the Masters into thinking the slaves were converted to Catholicism, when in fact, Voodoo, or Vuvu as it was called in the 1400 to 1700s, stayed strong in their hearts and the mysteries of the Loa stayed alive.
Today Voodoo is a branch of the Catholic church, and while most Christians call us Pagans or Heathens or worse, we are in fact Christian, and branch of Catholicism.
It's why you see me always with a rosary, which I wear like a necklace, much to the horrors of many Catholics, and why I have so many statues of Mary, Jesus, and the Saints all over my room and my car, and why I have crosses and crucifixes all over my walls, and why I wear veils, mantilla, and hijab.
If you walked in my room, you would immediately assume I was an extremely devout orthodox Catholic, and you'd be wrong.
I am a Voodoo Priestess rank of Medsan Fey Marija Loa to Damballah Weddo and serve the local shrine to Papa Damballah and Erzulies Freda and Danta. This painting was very dear to me.
It means I am married to God, something for which there was an actual wedding, with a wedding dress and everything.
In simpler terms: I'm a nun.
I am married to my god the same way a Catholic nun is married to Christ.
Which is also why sex is not a part of my life.
This painting is a painting that we Voodoo practitioners hold with deep reverence.
The Black Madonna, Erzulie Dantar, Our Dear Sweet Lady of Retribution.
Voodoo Practitioners, follow many things, many paths, many roads, many branches. But with every branch, every form of Voodoo, one thing remains constant: The Black Madonna. There is no Voodoo Practitioner on the planet, who does not have a statue or a prayer card or her dagger through the heart veevee on their prayer alter. She is the mother of life. The mother of us all. The goddess who created life, with Papa Damballah.
This painting is dearly beloved in the Voodoo Community, and now she is destroyed.
The painting was made in 1433, based off of the description of Jesus in the Bible.
The book of Revelations describes Jesus as having roped locks of hair like lambs wool and feet the colour of brass. Jesus was from the southern region of Judea which is in Africa.
Jesus was black. The Bible itself tells us this.
Most images of Jesus and Mary paint them white, blond, blue eyed... but that's not how the Bible described them.
This is one of the few historical images of a Black Jesus and a Black Mother Mary. And most Black people love it dearly. So why would followers of a movement to bring equality to black lives, destroy it?
Or did they? Was it people who hate the BLM movement and so destroyed a symbol near and dear to the hearts of millions in the black community?
Who destroyed this painting?
And why?
BLM graffiti is the only clue.
But is it, BLM because it was done by someone in the BLM movement?
Or was it done by someone against the BLM movement?
No one knows.
No one knows who did this.
My grandmother was half Black *(yes, I am 1/4 Black)* and she loved this painting. She didn't call it The Black Madonna like most people do, she called her Black Baby Jesus. She took a trip over there to see it in person.
Whoever did it, these people should pay heed to history, and to what happened to the pirates who slashed her face. It didn't end well for them.
Our dear Lady of Retribution, wielder of vengeance upon the unjust, may your curse of iniquity fall upon all who cause harm.
She was one of my 2 faves, along with The Immaculate Conception...
Erzulie Danta aka The Black Madonna
Erzulie Freda aka The Immaculate Conception
...and to see them both destroyed 2 days apart from each other is heartbreaking.
Why is the BLM movement attacking the Patron Saint of Slaves? Our Dear Lady of Retribution. Vicious Punisher of the Masters who take away freedom.
She is the symbol of everything the Black Lives Matter movement stands for, so why destroy her?
Do you idiots know nothing?
Do you not know the history of this painting?
Or how it got destroyed by Nazis in World War II... and it remains, rebuilt, in Poland, by Jewish Concentration Camp Survivors.
How many times has she been destroyed since her creation in 1433?
Freed Black Slaves, rebuilt her.
Freed Jews, rebuilt her again.
Why would you destroy the symbol of freedom? The symbol of escape from oppression? The symbol of survival against all odds?
Ignorance and arrogance is a dangerous pairing. This just proves their lack of intelligence. Destroying anything and everything, without knowing what it is.
Do you know, that without this painting, you even have the Black Lives Matter Foundation? Are you aware of the history of the organization you are screaming the name of from the rooftops?
Has anyone else noticed the similarities in behavior with this movement and ISIS or The Ku Klux Klan or The Nazis... destroying anything they don't like, taking control of portions of cities... doing it all in the name of a call to lord over others?
When you destroy history, try to erase it, you will allow it to happen again in future generations. Instead of burying bad parts of history, you should be teaching your children to learn from the mistakes of that history, so history doesn't repeat itself.
Funny thing is... this particular painting... she was hated by the Nazis too. They destroyed her. This is a reproduction that was made in 1945, because Nazis destroyed the original 1433 one.
She was rebuilt, to stand as a testament AGAINST fucking White Power bastards who murdered millions of Jews, Blacks, Gays, and Gypsies.
We Gypsies hail her as our Patron Saint, because she is a strong woman of colour, who survived one of the worst White Power atrocities in history.
If there is any painting out there that should be used as the fucking logo of the BLM movement... THIS IS IT! And you destroy her?
Why?
Regardless of which side destroyed it, you are both acting like ill mannered children.
One side smash and trashes items, then the other side retaliates back with more smash and trash, so the first side smashes more, then then 2nd side smashes back... when will it end? Both sides are acting like idiots right now. Neither side is making the other side look bad, because both sides are too busy making themselves look bad.
The Ku Klux Klan is parading up and down streets in Maine calling BLM protestors monkeys, and, I gotta say... they are kind of right. I mean, monkeys don't have enough brains to know not to smash things, so monkeys run around smashing things. Humans know better then to destroy things, because Humans know how to use their brains.
Think about that!
There should NEVER be a point, when we can say "The Ku Klux Klan is right."
The Ku Klux Klan are horrible people, and right now THEY are the ones in the right! That shouldn't happen! The villain shouldn't be better than the hero, and right now that is what's happening!
Come on people... 2 wrongs don't make a right.
Don't be like them!
Do not lower yourselves to their level.
We are better then this.
You ALL are better then this.
Stand up and prove you are better.
Smashing everything, because they smash everything, how does that make you any better than them?
It doesn't!
It makes you JUST LIKE THEM!
And they are standing out there calling black people monkeys! And I wish I could say they were wrong, but it's kind of hard to do, when you are running around, making mindless grunts, waving spray cans, smashing things up, and FUCKING ACTING LIKE MONKEYS!
You are giving the racists POWER OVER YOU!
That's all the rioting and vandalism is doing.
You are giving power to the fucking white power bastards.
STOP GIVING THEM POWER OVER YOU!
The whole point of the BLM Protests is the SHOW that black people ARE NOT monkeys! To prove that black people ARE humans and deserve to be treated like humans.
They should not be out there chanting "monkey" like that. Yes, they are wrong and it is horrible that they are doing it... but at WHY they are saying it.
They are saying that BECAUSE you are giving them reason to.
Don't prove the Ku Klux Klan to be right about black people... prove them WRONG!
#PROVE THEM WRONG!
Stop giving them power to hate. Stop feeding then fuel to fan their hatred with.
Are you people all so caught up in the frenzy of rioting that you not see yourselves, the way the white power haters see you, right now?
Go to Twitter and look for the hashtag "BLMTerrorists" and spend an hour or two, reading those Tweets.
You really, REALLY, need to look at what you are doing. Look at the message your rioting is sending. LOOK at what they saying about the rioters, the vandals.
They're scared. And that's bad. That's really bad. Because sooner or later, they'll lash back. And it won't be good. It never is.
And look at what the rioters are doing.
It's not just statues anymore.
Did you see the video footage of a mob of rioters who ran into Target, and started smashing up the store with baseball bats, and when an elderly man in his 90s, ran from the store to avoid getting hurt, the mod dragged him to the ground, torn off his Covid19 facemask, starting spitting in his face, while kicking him. That happened this morning.
How about the one that happened Sunday. Another elderly man, this one his 80s, leaving church, heading across the parking lot, going to his car... when a BLM mob, came storming across the parking lot, grabbing anyone they saw and throwing them to the ground. Three men, mauled the old man. Beat unconscious. For no reason. He didn't even see or hear them coming.
That's not right.
That's not protesting.
That's being a gangster.
Mobster.
You know what mobster means, right? It means, being part of mob and beating people up for the fun of it.
That's all this has become. A mob of rioters, beating people up for the fun of it.
It's wrong.
You know it is.
Hurting people is never right.
Violence is not going to solve anything.
Violence is just going to make, people who hate minorities, start to hate minorities even more! That the opposite of what we need or want.
Think!
Use your brains.
Every time you act like mindless animals, you just give the white power lunatics MORE POWER over you!
Don't give them that power. They don't deserve it.
Look at what is happening.... You destroy their works of art, so they fight back, by destroying ours.
Can't you see what you are doing?
LOOK at the swastika across The Black Madonna's face, and the words BLM underneath.
This is wrong on so many levels.
These riots, all vandalism... you'll gain one or two victories, small ones, meaningless ones, you'll get statues moved... but what is the fucking point?
You've lost focus of the BIG PICTURE... which is saving lives.
Taking down a statue is NOT going to save lives.
You people should be in courthouse, filing paperwork, writing dockets, reading law books, and getting laws passed.
You can do that. You don't NEED politicians to do those things. All you need is the make your case, in front of a judge who agrees with you.
That's it.
You don't need violence.
You don't need riots.
You don't need vandalism.
You need law books and enough education to know how to write a docket and word it persuasively, so that you can convince a judge, to sign off on that law and get it passed.
Why are none of you doing THAT?
Violence is NOT the answer.
Hate crimes are not the answer.
Riots are not the answer.
Criminal acts are not the answer.
You'll be no help to anyone if you get arrested and are behind bars.
These protests are NOT peaceful, and you're deluded if you think they are.
Yes, there are dirty cops out there. I've met plenty in my lifetime.
But for every bad cop I've ever meet, I've met dozens of officers who were good.
Taking over police stations, setting fire to police cruisers, beating up police officers, just because they are police officers.... none of this is right. It's terrorism.
Yes, action needs to be taken, but not violent action. Look in the mirror... you people are using acts of terrorism to protest acts of terrorism. That's not right.
You don't fight fire with fire.... all that does is make the fire bigger. You are fanning the flames of hate and making them grow.
You fight fire with water. You put the fire out.
You need to tame the lion of hate, make it a lamb of peace. Sooth it. Teach it to see the error of it's ways. Show it that it can trust you, let it know you won't hurt it. That's win the lion over.
But if you attack the lion, threaten it, hurt it, it'll lash back, fiercer, meaner, far worse than it was to begin with.
Can you not see that?
Can you not see, how all this violence is only stirring the haters up more and teaching them to say to themselves "We was right about them minorities"...
You should be showing the haters, that they are wrong, not that they are right.
Every act of violence committed in the name of "Black Lives Matter" only teaches white people, to hate black people even more.
Don't prove the haters they are right, prove them wrong instead.
What the hell is wrong with you people?
Have you all got your heads shoved so damned far up your asses that you are just going to destroy anything and everything you get near now, even symbols like THIS, that you should be hailing as one of the greatest memorials in tribute to people of colour?
She is a tribute AGAINST fucking White Supremacists.... don't you idiots know that?
Or is that EXACTLY the point?
No one saw who did this.
And it happened after so many statues were torn down, statues of white men, torn down by black men.
Are we now seeing here White Supremacists "fighting back"?
It's possible.
But I wonder... how many of the BLM Protesters have ever faced REAL racism face to face?
How many of them, have ever been attacked by the REAL and ACTUAL Ku Klux Klan?
Look at the memes on Twitter, showing supposed KKK pictures... people in white pillow cases with holes cut out.
That is NOT the REAL Ku Klux Klan... you know right?
GOOGLE THE FUCKING BASTARDS! Find out what they REALLY look like, what they REALLY wear.
They wear miter hats, with veils on the front, and long heavily embroidered and beaded white robes, with large red crosses on their capes. Their outfits are EXACT REPLICAS of the Catholic Pope's robes and hat.
It's not a white pointy pillowcase.
Also, ONLY the leaders wear white.
The rest of the members, wear colours based on rank. Green Robes, Red Robes, Blue Robes, Yellow Robes, Black Robes... the REAL card-carrying members of the Ku Klux Klan, DO NOT WEAR WHITE!
There are 200,000 active card-carrying members of the REAL Ku Klux Klan, living in Maine. The largest concentration of them in one place, on the entire planet.
And they are actual terrorists. They build bombs. They murder children. They skin people alive, hang them in trees, and leave them there to bleed to death and long slow death that takes weeks to happen.
And they DO NOT WEAR WHITE!
The fakes as white robes and pillow case hoods, are a thing that was created by Hollywood Movies... it's NOT a thing that exists in the REAL world.
Fake ass wanna-bes, wear white robes and white pillow cases, because they never saw a REAL KKK member and they don't know shit about the REAL Ku Klux Klan. They dress up in white robes and put pillow cases on their heads, because that is what MOVIES tell people the Ku Klux Klan does.
That's how you can tell the fake ass wanna-bes from the REAL Ku Klux Klan. And if you have ever seen them face to face, you'd have known that.
My first encounter with the Ku Klux Klan... I was 14 years old. Me and 5 other children were kidnapped and tortured.
Anastasia was just 4 years old. A toddler. They ripped off her leg. Doing so, pulled her intestines out, and spilled her partly digested breakfast all over the floor.
Then they just left her there.
It took her a week to die.
Tajid... they beat his chest, crushed his lungs. He saved my life. Those blows were meant for me. He got between me and them. He died 2 days later.
I survived.
July 1, 2001. A backhoe drove my house while my family was gone to the movies. We rebuilt.
February 14, 2003, my doctor's office, First Care Health Clinic, Saco Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine... was blown up with a bomb. My doctor died. 3 of his nurses died. 21 patients were hospitalized in critical condition. The Ku Klux Klan left an 8 foot tall white cross in the parking lot.
It wasn't in the news.
I was there. It was the first Ku Klux Klan bomb, I survived.
May 9, 2006, they beat up my dad, he is in a coma for 2 months, and an additional 6 months in the hospital recovering.
October 16, 2006, a bomb blew up my house, and the Ku Klux Klan left an 8 foot tall white cross in my rose garden.
It wasn't in the news.
It was 1AM. I was asleep in my bed. The bomb was put in the doorway of my bedroom. I was on fire. My hair and my clothes were burned off of me. It was the second Ku Klux Klan bomb, I survived.
We rebuilt again.
April 7, 2007, a backhoe drove over my house, again. We rebuilt again.
Also in 2007, the headless body of a teenage girl was found in the parking lot of Scarborough, Shaw's. Her head was found on the Payne Road, 3 months later, with a circle of 7 dead black labrador retriever dogs around her head.
May 9, 2010, they saw 1964 Dodge 330 car in half.
Also, 2010, a 90-year-old black man, was beaten to death with a shopping cart, in Westbrook Shaw's parking lot, while dozens of white onlookers cheered on his murderer.
May 2013, Southern Maine Community College was evacuated when a bomb was found under my desk, a desk I sat at every day. It was the 3rd bomb I survived.
June 4, 2013, my cousin Murphy's headless body was left in the crossroad of Ross Road and Cascade Road, Old Orchard Beach, Maine.
June 8, 2013, my cousin Murphy's head was left in the crossroad of Portland Ave and Road Road, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, a 1/4 mile away from where his body had been left.
I live on Portland Ave, 5 houses from that crossroad. I found his body while driving home from work at the Maine Mall.
August 8, 2013, a backhoe drove over my house, again.
November 14, 2013, while putting my art easel in the back of my car, after art studio class at Southern Maine Community College, a man and 2 women, with a metal golf club and 2 metal baseball bats, attacked. They were waiting behind my car. I didn't see them. They broke my legs, my hip, my knee. I was paralyzed for 5 months. It took me 18 months to relearn to walk.
#You think you know racism... I guarantee you don't know it half as well as I do.
August 2014... Saco Shaw's made national news when a woman's head was found in the ice cream freezer.
A week later another head was found in their dumpster.
April 10, 2015, 12 members of my family were kidnapped, by 14 Ku Klux Klan members, all of them police officers at the Scarborough, Maine Police Department, and Old Orchard Beach, Maine Police Department.
Do you remember Bela? She used to be in all my videos. A police officer beat her head in with a cinder block. Ripped her jaw clean off her face. April 10, 2015. That's why she's not in streams anymore.
Do you remember Georgie? Same thing. Same brick. Split the whole side of his head open.
While a pole with an electric taser neck hold held them down.
12 members of my family, had that happen. April 10, 2015.
How old were they?
The oldest was 14.
The youngest was 4.
Three were 7.
Two were 5.
Yeah. They were very young.
Still think you know what racism is?
But why would white people care about children? Children are disposable in America, remember? Americans murder 5,000 babies every day. Ninety Million babies have been murdered in America, since 1991. It's no wonder, white power terrorists think nothing is wrong with killing children. Murdering babies is, after all the American way.
Two escaped. They lived, but both have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and both are missing all their teeth and most of their jaws.
The other 10?
May 15, 2015, their heads were nailed to my door. Their intestines wrapped around my windows.
It wasn't in the news.
Maine law, only a police officer can report a crime to the news stations or newspapers.
But when the police officers, are marching around wearing white robes and white hoods and erected white crosses in the front yards of the people they torment... there are no police officers too who will file the reports.
THAT is REAL racism.
THAT is REAL police brutality.
But we're just Gypsies, so no one cares.
And this is Maine, the state that is proud to call itself: 99.9% white.
And this is The Town of Old Orchard Beach, a town run by the Ku Klux Klan. They took over our town in 2001. Now they run the Town Hall, the Police Department, the Fire Department, and Dispatch.
Heaven help you if you live in Old Orchard Beach, and you need to call 911, but you ain't white enough for them to respond.
Heaven help you if they do respond... and you're not white enough... because whatever help you called them for, they'll beat the shit out of you.
November 2015, Scarborough Walmart was evacuated, because a bomb was left in my department, under one of the HallMark card displays. I worked at WalMart at the time. It was the 4th bomb I survived.
July 24, 2016, Scarborough Walmart was evacuated, yet again, because a bomb was left in my department, under one of the HallMark card displays. I worked at WalMart at the time. It was the 5th bomb I survived.
July 26, 2016, while putting groceries in my car, at Scarborough Walmart, the same attackers from 2013, beat me with a shopping cart and left me for dead. They broke my spine. Severed the nerves in my spinal column. I've never walked again.
5 times in 2018... you saw my live streams interrupted, as the Ku Klux Klan arrived in my driveway, a shot bullet holes through the walls... you saw them on the live streams. The VODs are still up. I didn't take them down.
October 2019... local Jewish Synagogue was bombed. They blew the whole side off the building. You saw it in my live streams... I drove there and showed you what they did...
It wasn't in the news.
February 12, 2020, yet another of my cousins was gunned down. This time in Scarborough, Maine WalMart, while putting groceries in his car.
Biddeford, Maine's Rotary Park, used to have the Guinness World Record for the tallest, largest flag pole. They took it down 5 years ago. Do you know why?
Because in the dead of winter, Old Orchard Beach Officers, thought it would be funny, the strip a 14 year old boy naked, tie his ankles to the back bumper of a police car, and drive 14 miles from Old Orchard Beach, to that flag pole, and tie the child to the rope, like he was a lag, host him to the top, and left him there. 3 days of blizzard later, a dog walker found him, nearly frozen to death, unconscious, hanging upside down from the flagpole.
They assumed him to be gay, he wasn't, but they thought he was because he was wearing a pink coat.
It wasn't in the news. So if you didn't know the family, you didn't know it happened.
2 weeks ago, Black Lives Matter protestors arrived in Biddeford, Maine... they were meet face to face with white hoods carrying assault rifles, machine guns, and Gatlin guns... the protesters, didn't have the balls to stand up to REAL racists, so they fled to Sanford, Maine... but one of the Ku Klux Klan's primary "club" buildings is in Sandford, Maine, so the protestors were met with even more white hoods carrying assault rifles, machine guns, and Gatlin guns... the protesters, didn't have the balls to stand up to REAL racists, so the protestors fled to Monmouth, Maine, and after 5 hours there... they fled Maine entirely.
It wasn't in the news.
Why wasn't it in the news?
All us locals here in Maine, we saw it happen. We saw the protesters turn tail and run, as soon as the White Hoods marched out with their assault rifles.
The BLM protestors CLAIM they have lived with racism, but when they came to Maine, they found out fast, that they really had no clue, what REAL racists are like.
You don't know racism until you've lived with the fucking Ku Klux Klan terrorizing your town, terrorizing your family.
They kidnapped 12 members of my family. April 10, 2015. Tortured them. Killed 10 of them. And nailed their heads to my door.
#THAT IS FUCKING REAL RACISM!!!
You people don't know shit!
The BLM protestors are attacking statues and paintings because they are cowards who don't have the balls to fight REAL racists. They proved that when they arrived in Maine and got chased out within 5 hours, by the fucking Ku Klux Klan.
Yeah, you want to decry police brutality?
Do you remember a few years ago, a black boy while standing in line, at San Diego Comic-Con, waiting to buy tickets for the convention, was gunned down by a police officer...
Do you know who that black boy was? He was cousin Matt. The one I used to play multiplayer video games with... the reason I don't play multiplayer video games anymore.
His mother was so distraught over his death, that she remarried his father and 7 other men. Yeah, my aunt with the 8 husbands. That's WHY she has the 8 husbands. Her son gunned down by a police officer because he was the only coloured person standing in a line of white people, and the police officer thought that was suspicious.
Attacking statues and paintings doesn't help anybody.
You aren't bringing awareness, you are just making yourselves look like idiots.
Don't be haters.
There are enough haters in the world already. Don't add to the hate.
And those of us, who live with REAL racists in our towns, and are families are being brutalized, tortured, and murdered by those fucking racists... you are making life worse for US...
...because while you can go back home, and be safe, we still have the Ku Klux Klan lording over our town. And no amount of torn down statues or destroyed paintings is going to stop them.
And all you people have done is made things worse, for those of us, who live with the daily constant threat of violence at the hands of REAL White Supremacists.
You people running around calling politicians, actors, singers, white supremacists because of something they said on Twitter... you haven't got a fucking clue what a REAL White Supremacists is like.
And let me ask you this: how are YOU any different, from the racist white people who destroy all things non-white?
You're not. You are just the same.
You are acting just like them.
Violence is only going to breed more violence. Don't you people know that?
You who are destroying things... you don't care about the consequences of your actions, but you will not suffer any harm.
But what about my family?
Persian Gypsies. 1/2 Jewish, 1/4 Native American, and 1/4 Black. Not one drop of white blood in us ... living in Old Orchard Beach... the whitest town, of the whitest state in America... and town that got taken over by the Ku Klux Klan June 2001.
Do you care?
Do you care what they will do to us, in retaliation, for what you people are doing to statues on the other side of the world from us?
Do you care, at all?
You people say you care... but I don't see it.
I don't see it at all.
All I see is a herd of mindless sheep, jumping on a bandwagon, following the herd, and not once stopping to think about the consequences of their actions.
You people keep asking me "Why Avallac'h?", "Why are you so obsessed?", "Why did this fandom take over your life?"... look at the date it started.
* Did you know I'm on 24 hour suicide watch, and I have been since January 4, 2016?
* Did you know I was hospitalized for a nervous breakdown, after 10 members of my family had their heads nailed to the door?
* Did you know I have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder?
* Did you know Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is not itself an illness, but rather is a symptom and a coping mechanism for dealing with extreme emotional trauma?
* Did you know, a team of doctors, psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers, and FBI agents, had me hooked up to tons of medical monitors, heart monitors, blood monitors, a portable EKG... for weeks, so they monitor what activities I did, so they determine a lifestyle change prescription, that would get my resting heart rate under 131 and my blood pressure over 70 over 60?
* Did you know that the doctors discovered that the ONLY time my body relaxes on any level at all is when I'm playing Witcher 3?
* Did you know, I have an actual prescription, which says, to play Witcher 3 as much as possible every day?
* Did you know, playing Witcher 3 is the only thing keeping me alive right now, and my doctors says the worst I could do right now, is STOP playing it?
The Ku Klux Klan took everything from me. My home. My family. My health.
I have no one now. I have 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year, of the rest of my life, to be crippled, bedridden, and alone.
"Why Avallac'h?", "Why are you so obsessed?", "Why did this fandom take over your life?"... because I used to be able to walk. I used to have a family. I used to have a home. And I'm having a very difficult time trying to find a reason to live. And I needed something to take away the pain. I needed someone who had lost everything as brutalily as I had, to talk to, because only someone who had been through what I had been through, would understand how I feel. I needed something to see, other then 10 heads nailed to my door. It's all I can see. I can't sleep. I can't eat. I can't close my eyes. I can't get the image of their bloody heads out of my mind.
Playing this video game, researching every detail, writing articles, and sewing the costume, it's the only thing I can do that blots out the images of their heads. And as soon as I stop playing the game, stop rereading the novels, stop making screenshots, stop writing the articles, stop sewing the costume, the images of their heads are back.
I can't function at all any more. I haven't been able to function since April 10, 2015.
This obsession with Avallac'h... it's not about him. He's just the tool that right now keeping me from killing myself, until I can find something else, some reason to live.
And you people, you think because someone called you a hate slur, that you know racism is. You have no clue.
Until the Ku Klux Klan, kills your entire family and nails their heads to your door... you'll never know what it like to live with real racism.
You who don't know REAL racism, you think you are being funny with your acts of hate and violence, smashing statues? If you ACTUALLY knew REAL racism, you'd be so mentally broken that you wouldn't be able to see the statues, because all you can see is the horror of your murdered families's remains.
And because you don't know REAL racism, after you get done destroying things, you can safely go home, because while you THINK, someone is racist, because they called you a "nigga"... it's just a word. These people who murdered my family and destroyed my home, and left me crippled, they call me a "nigga" all the time. I don't even look black. I'm not even close to being able to pass for black. Heck, half the people who call me "nigga" 10 or 12 shades of brown darker than me. I'm 1/4 black, but you wouldn't know it to look at me. I'm physically whiter than most white people. But that doesn't matter to White Power people like the Ku Klux Klan. They don't care about skin colour. They care about blood.
If you think, you know what racism is because someone used hate slurs to describe you, then you don't know a thing about racism. Words can't hurt you. But bombs can. As can golf clubs. Guns can. Shopping carts can.
Look at yourselves... destroying property, vandalism... why? What good does it do? Do you think about those of us who live here and are left behind after you get done trashing things, and you back to the safety of your homes, where the worst thing you have to deal with is people calling you dirty words?
... we are left behind when you leave, and we are the one who will be hanging from flagpoles, our heads nailed to doors, our homes and churches bombed, by REAL racists, who don't just spout off hate slurs, because they are too busy loading their assault rifles and building bombs.
You don't know what REAL racism is.... if you did, you wouldn't be doing these thing, because you'd know how badly every non-white who lives in a town where there are active Ku Klux Klan members, is going to suffer, because of what you people are doing.
If you REALLY wanted to make a difference... you'd do something to make life safe for families like mine, instead of attacking statues and paintings that are never going to hurt anybody.
#STOP THE HATE!
They hate you.
You hate them.
When does it end?
Stop destroying things and start helping people.
Stop spreading hate and start spreading peace.
We who live with actual racism, we desperately need your help... but what you are doing right now... you are making things even worse for us.
Stop making things worse.
Start making things better.
Spread love and peace, not hate and violence.
Before & After
Damages Done To
The Dazzling Razzberry aka The Autism Awareness Car
What Happened To The Dazzling RazzBerry?
The answer is a vicious streamer on Twitch took to spreading maliciously slanderous sex rumors and lies about me, convincing people that I was what she termed: "A BDSM Dominatrix"
Me, a 5th Generation Mormon Turned Voodoo Priestess Rank of Marija Loa!
An asexual nun living a celibate life!
| A Look At What Happens When So-Called "Pranksters"
Take Their Twitch Chat & DisCord Sex-Jokes Too Far
& Send a Gang of 5 Rapists To My House
aka
The Deserve To Be Raped Raids & Why I Turned Off Twitch Chat...
How The Avallac'h Playthrough changed my life, caused the destruction of The Dazzling Razzberry Autism Awareness Car, made 28 families homeless, caused the death of a 10 year old
Including a detailed look inside what news media said was "The Worst Child Abuse Case In American History", more info about Etiole, and how growing up in a child sex slavery ring caused my to start The Avallac'h Playthrough - [NSFW] |
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Welcome to the New
Space Dock 13!
Helping Authors Write Weird, Bizarre, Absurd, Psychedelic Horror-Fantasy Since 1996!
(We've Moved & Changed URLs; Space Dock 13 is now EelKat.com)
(We are also novel-writing-tips.com, a-pink-unicorn.com, & of course are still SpaceDock13.com)
| Home | Site Index | Top 100 Pages | Search| About |
| The Adventures of The Pink Necromancer: Quaraun The Insane | FAQs |
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I Now Hold The World Record
For The Highest Level Ever Achieved in Witcher 3!!
If This Video Is Active, I'm Live Streaming Right Now...
WARNING:
Avallac'h & Ciri Shipping Happens Daily In My Cult of Avallac'h Stream
(This seems to piss people off so we seem to need to provide a warning about it)
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I have Kanner's Syndrome (ACTUAL Autism, not Aspergers), which means I'm not good at group things. I'm classified as Savant, meaning I have a few things that I obsess about, big time, and have world records in them as a result, and everything else in my life I still require a caretaker to help me with.
I was believed to be mute until I was 31 years old, when a college professor whose day job was working with Autism children, meet me at an Autism Awareness event (I own The Autism Awareness Car, which has 2.5million marbles glued to it - took 4 years to build it). He spent several years teaching me to talk and I was able to get a GED at age 37 (I had never been allowed to go to school as Autism in the 1970s = too retarded to be taught anything so why bother? It was assumed I couldn't be taught, so no one tried to, until I was 31 years old), and started college at age 42.
Today in addition to being a rabid gamer, I'm also an artist (acrylic on canvas and watercolor on rag) sell my art in local galleries, I build art cars and installation art, published over 130 Dark Fantasy novels, and became a retail merchandiser for Macy's, WalMart, and HallMark for 16 years because I'm very good at organizing things... I can't do much else, but I can certainly make sure nothing on the sales floor is out of place.
On Twitch I'm known for my ability to open up a video game and completely rewrite it removing and making my own... I rewrote Witcher 3, removed Geralt and Roach and the combat system, and build my own player character, made travel companions, wrote a new combat system, made new quests, made new maps... removed all the texture files and made all new ones. There's nothing in Witcher 3 that I have not rewritten. With over 4,000 mods now made for it, you can barely recognize my game as being Witcher 3 anymore.... and yet I can't read C++ code.
I spent my childhood and teen years, being told I would never amount to anything. I proved them all wrong.
People see the things I do very well (art, writing, my exemplary organization skills in retail stores, and my ability to open up a video game and completely rewrite it and making my own) but they often don't see past that.
Social skills are a thing I've not yet mastered, which makes streaming very difficult for me as, chat is sensory overload and I have it turned off. I also can't count, do Math, tell time, use calendars, use money, numbers are lost on me.
Basic things - bathing, eating, brushing my hair, etc - that most people have no trouble with, I have caretakers who have to help me do those thing, even though I'm 20, 30, 40 years older than my caretakers. I am VERY low-functioning, but I can write, I can paint, I disect video games, and I can organize things. I just can't do one thing else. Which is very upsetting, because I wish I could. I try too. I don't know why I can't. It's like there are a few things in my brain turned all the way up on super high and everything else is just turned off and won't come on.
And then there are issues with meltdowns, screaming fits, panic attacks, bad ones. Bad enough that I generally avoid contact with the public, simply because I'm tired of dealing with the police. Someone my age, screaming on the floor, people assume I'm on drugs and call the police. It's very frustrating, because I can not control these attacks and I can't stop them once they start.
It is extremely distressing, I'm insanely good at a few things, but everything else, things most of society doesn't bat an eye at, I can't do them, no matter how hard I try. And I'm not capable of "acting properly" or "behaving in socially acceptable ways".
Most people when they meet me in real life, they are very taken back, by how extremely disabled I am. Fans of my novels, meet me at book signings and ask: "So, what's the joke, what's this retard doing here, where's the author?" They refuse to believe, someone as deeply retarded as me, is capable of writing novels.
It hurts a lot, people's reactions to meeting me and them finding out the reality of what ACTUAL Autism, Kanner's Syndrome, is really like... and that it's NOTHING like Asperger's, with it's "cute Sheldon Cooper quirks" that they are used to and think of as being Autism.
They forget, people with Asperger's can live normal lives, they can pass for normal in public if they have too, they get married and have families, and I'm not capable of living on my own or without caretakers, and I never will be.
I wish more people knew the difference between Aspergers and Autism, and how vastly different they are from each other. Far too many people hear that I have Autism, and they automatically assume I have Aspergers, and then they meet me in person, and are shocked, horrified, and they tell me they've meet dozens, sometimes hundreds of Aspies, and when they meet me, they say, they realize, they've NEVER seen Autism before, in spite of all the hundreds of Aspies they've met, and then they tell me, they wish they had known, they wished someone had told them, how starkly different Autism is from Aspergers, because they always say, no matter how many Aspies they worked with, it never prepared them to come face to face with ACTUAL REAL Autism, Kanner's Syndrome, for the first time.
1 in 3 children have Aspergers, it's very common, but only 1 in 1,200,000 children have Autism, it's very rare. In the wake of the mass flood of people calling Asperger's Autism, people forget how incredibly rare actual Autism really is. They aren't the same thing and until you've seen both side by side, you don't realize how different they really are.
People forget WHY I became such a good writer. I was mute for 31 years. Writing was the only way I could communicate with anyone. But I grew up in a family that crumpled up the paper, never even looked at it. In their minds I was too stupid to talk and therefore anything I wrote on paper MUST have been gibberish. They didn't even look at it. So I wrote letters to the cats that lived with us. I started doing that when I was 8 years old. I still do it 50+ years later.
But I'm not likely to be much use in a group, as outside of writing, art, video games, and organizing sale floors of retail stores, I'm too retarded to be able to do anything else. I'm rarely welcomed in groups, because I'm too retarded, too Autistic to fit in, or so I'm always told. I'm rarely of any use to anyone.
On Writing An Actually Autistic Character Accurately: Quaraun VS Real Autism
What is wrong with Quaraun?
(Continued From HERE.)
(Supplemental Information HERE.)
(On Writing A Clinically Insane Character Accurately, While Avoiding The Psychopath Stereotype - Part 3)
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EelKat Wendy C Allen as Quaraun the Insane
So, 3 days ago (back on July 5, 2017; it is now July 8, 2017) when I first started writing this thing, back on Page 1 of this article that got very long an has now passed 50,000 words making it officially what NaNoWriMo considered to be a novel length work...
Back then, 3 days ago, I put a list on the page and at the end of the list said:
How does Quaraun compare to those facts about Autism? As this page has gotten too long already and has already had to be cut into multiple pages, I'm going to answer that question on a new page, which I will link here once it is completed.
... and so, that is the focus of this section of this now very long, multi page article.
If you have not read the previous articles...
- #1: I have Autism. Not Aspergers. Not Autism Spectrum Disorder. But ACTUAL Autism, which is vastly different from either Aspergers of Autism Spectrum Disorder.
- #2: I am an author, who writes an Autistic character who's Autism is based off of my own Autism symptoms, and whos life is losely based off actual events from my own life.
- #3: I am writing this article series because another writer requested it, because they were seeking to write an Autistic (not Asperger) character, but could not find much information online about ACTUAL Autism aka Kanner's Syndrome.
If you've never read the Quaraun series, some things you should probably be aware of when reading the novel excerpts found on this page:
- #1: The Quaraun series is listed as the following genres: Yaoi, Bizarro, Dark Fantasy, Sword & Sorcery, High Fantasy, Epic Fantasy, Psychological Horror
- #2: Quaraun is not Human. He is an Elf and as such, is physically able to live though things/not be harmed by things that would normally kill a Human.
- #3: Quaraun is a polyamorous bi-sexual transvestite, with 4 wives and 2 male lovers. (If you are uncertain the difference between a transgender person, a transsexual, and a transvestite, then please read this page to find out what each word means.)
- #4: Quaraun is a fictional character. Yes, I know is seems ridiculous that I have to say this, however... some people are not able to tell the difference between fact and fiction, reality and fantasy, the author and a fictional character, and as such, gay-haters beat me up (a straight female) accusing me of being a gay transsexual man, after reading one of the novels from the Quaraun series.
- #5: While the Autism components of his character are portrayed accurately, he also suffers from a FICTIONAL, illness as well, which was created based off of a combination of Naegleria fowleri, Kuru, & Mad Cow Disease, 3 very rare real world illnesses that cause insanity. In the books this FICTIONAL illness is called "Thullid Infestation" and is what Quaraun is referencing when he says such things as "There's a Jelly Fish in my head" or "A Jelly Fish ate my brain". (Yes, one's brain being eating by a tiny jelly bodied parasite is a real thing that can happen to you, Google "Naegleria fowleri" to find out more about it.)
So, on with our article...
Back on Page 1, I had created the list, which is now copied and pasted below. On the previous page it was just a list of facts. Here on this page however, I will now take each of these facts, and underneath each one, compare that fact to Quaraun, his character, his personality, his lifestyle, his symptoms, his reactions to the world around him, and his back story, so see how well, this fictional Autistic character matches up to actual real world Autism.
Each fact from the list will be shown here bolded, the text block following it will be the comparison of the fact to Quaraun's character.
And so, I give you the list...
*sigh*
So... I'm adding this little side bar here, because I just been here writing for 2 hours straight... then BOOM! My computer decides:
"Hey, guess what! Windows 10 here, it's time to update and restart your computer without telling you we're going to update, and we're also going to be nice and wonderfully considerate by not giving you any chance to save your work before we turn your computer off and restart it without warning you, Ha ha! Oh by the way, I know you changed the settings to not allow automatic updates, but we realize you didn't really mean that, so we are over-riding that setting for this update, because it's soooo damned important. ~ Love from Microsoft! Thank you for using Windows10, enjoy your utterly useless update to a feature you never even use!"
So... I now I have to go rewrite everything I just wrote, because now that the computer has come back on, I find that more then half what I wrote wasn't saved, because autosave wasn't turned on.
One of the many joys of being an author. Yay!
And then people wonder why we authors don't like Windows' automated update system.
Oh well, I guess it's a god thing I have Autism and have a photographic memory and can easily retype word for word everything I already typed, now isn't it?
Off to rewrite, every thing I already wrote.
*sigh*
As a result of that computer mishap.... this page is only partly finished... I'm going to publish what was saved now (July 10, 2017) and then go back and rewrite all over again the part that got deleted... that section should be added here tomorrow or the next day...
Think you know what it's like to live with Autism?
You might be surprised how little you really know.
A look at REAL Autism and the myth spread by those with a self-diagnosis.
Are You Sure You Know What Autism Is?
Did you know?
NOTE: Most of the first few items on the list reference Asperger's not Autism, so it'll be a few items in before these become relevant to writing Quaraun's character, but I'm gonna comment on each of these anyways as we go down the list.
ACTUAL Autism (Kanner's Syndrome) is very RARE, effecting only 1 in every 10,000 children
Self diagnosed Asperger's is very COMMON with 1 in 3 children self-diagnosed
ACTUAL Asperger's is rarer then people think however as only 1 in 400 children who actually have a doctor's diagnose
1 in 64 children are diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder, which means they DO NOT have Autism
Autism Spectrum Disorder means "an illness that is commonly misdiagnosed as Autism, but is not Autism."
I wish more people knew this one.
The Autism Spectrum Disorder page of Wikipedia, states that there are 5 ASDs. This is incorrect and was obviously written by someone who is quoting internet memes rather then actual medical books. There are more then 60 ASDs.
I also wish the ill-informed parents of Asperger's children would stop deleting ACTUAL DOCTOR'S text on the Autism Wikipedia page and replacing it with their wild, deranged, urban myths about what they THINK Autism is.
Sadly more then half the information on the Autism Wikipedia page is incorrect and was written largely by self-diagnosed Aspies and their parents. Wikipedia also has a page for Asperger's but, they are too good for that page.
Hopefully doctors actually trained to treat and diagnose Autism will eventually notice that the stuff they wrote for the Autism page has been deleted by parents of Asperger children and replaced by conspiracy theories about mercury and vaccinations.
That's the problem with Wikipedia: any one can write anything on any page and there is no one to check to make sure the information is correct.
In 2007 the information on the Kanner's Syndrome Wikipedia page was correct, but Sheldon Cooper wasn't famous yet, so the Autism Boom had not yet started. If you want accurate information about Autism, don't rely on Wikipedia... the current page for Kanner's Syndrome is almost 90% information on Asperger's Syndrome instead. Someone REALLY needs to do something about fixing the massive amount of errors on that page.
Only 1 in every 10,000 people are ACTUALLY Autistic
Only 1 in every 17,000 people will ever encounter a REAL ACTUALLY Autistic person in their lifetime
1 in every 8 Autistic people will be murdered before the age of 25
Quaraun is murdered, though he is elderly at the time it happens, so he partly falls in with this statistic and partly does not.
1 in every 7 Autistic people will commit suicide because of a bully
Quaraun does attempt to commit suicide multiple times, and in most instances it is triggered by a bully.
1 in every 2 Autistic people will die by the age of 45
Well, Quaraun doesn't fall into this statistic, as he reaches old age. He lives to be about 750 years old (equivalent to around 75 years old in Human years).
40% of self-diagnosed Asperger children between the ages of 12 and 18, admit they only claimed to have Aspergers "to be more like Sheldon Cooper" and could not name any symptoms of Aspergers other then: "high IQ, reads comic books, and is socially awkward"
This one does not apply to Quaraun as he has Autism, not Asperger's.
Though let's comment on this while we are here...
Did you know that a High IQ is NOT a symptom of either Autism or Aspergers?
- An IQ of 140 or more is considered "genius"
- A High IQ is considered to be any IQ over 130.
- An IQ of 110 to 130 is considered "smart"
- An IQ of 90 to 110 is considered "normal IQ range for most people".
- The average IQ of most people on the planet is 100.
- An IQ of 75 to 90 is considered "slow" or "stupid"
- A Low IQ is considered to be any IQ under 75.
- An IQ of 60 or less is considered "mentally retarded"
So where do people with Autism and Aspergers fall?
- High Functioning Aspergers = an IQ on the high side of average, usually 100 to 120
- Aspergers = an IQ on the low side of average, usually of 90 to 100
- High Functioning Autism = an IQ of 75 or higher and can speak in full sentences
- Autism = an IQ of 75 or less and is able to communicate verbally in short 2 or 3 word phrases
- Low Functioning Autism = believed to have an IQ below 60, but being non-verbal makes it difficult to tell
In actual studies done on people ACTUALLY diagnosed with Aspergers, fewer then 10% of them had an IQ higher then 120 and NONE of them had an IQ of over 130.
There are NO known cases of an ACTUAL Aspie with a High IQ
Autism and Aspergers having a High IQ is an urban myth, spread largely by internet memes posted on Tumblr and Pinterest, then shared on FaceBook and Twitter. It is one of the many FICTIONAL symptoms of Asperger's that was created to make Sheldon Cooper's character "more interesting" for the TV Show Big Bang Theory.
Keep in mind that "The Autism Boom" is made up largely of "self diagnosed" Asperger's, and the "boom" occurred the same month the Big Bang Theory TV show was awarded "the most popular show on television".
80% of the people who claim to be "a self diagnosed Aspie" when tested by a doctor, are found to NOT have Asperger's at all.
Interestingly, while 1 in 3 people claim to be "a self diagnosed Aspie with an IQ of 135 or more", and ACTUAL IQ of 135 is incredibly rare and only .03% of the world's population (2.4 million people) have it.
There are currently 11 million people in the United States who claim to be "self diagnosed Aspies with an IQ of more then 135" and yet there are only 2.4 million people on the planet with an IQ of 130 or more and two thirds of them live in China, not America.
There are ACTUALLY fewer then 500,000 people in the United States with an IQ of 130 or more. Meaning that of the 11 million "High IQ" Aspies in the USA, 10.5 million of them are lying about their IQ range.
To compare how many people that is... the State of Maine in 2014, just crossed having a population of 2 million people. Maine is a very small state, with not many people. The amount of people who live in Maine, is the same number of people there are on the planet who ACTUALLY have a High IQ of 130 or more.
And yet.... In the United States alone, there are 11 million people claiming to have self-diagnosed themselves as Aspies "because my IQ is over 130".
And yet... Having a High IQ is NOT a symptom of Aspergers!
Sheldon Cooper (a fictional character) has a High IQ AND he has Aspergers.
Fans of Sheldon Cooper see that and think "High IQ = Aspergers; I have a High IQ therefore I must have Aspergers"; and thus you have the current "Autism Boom".
Also, if Sheldon Cooper was real, his IQ would be somewhere around 200... waaaay above 130. Fewer then 100 people have ever been found to have an IQ above 160.
People fail to realize that Sheldon Cooper is a FICTIONAL character and that while many of his Asperger's symptoms are portrayed accurately, there are just as many FAKE/FICTIONAL symptoms that were given to his character for the sake of plot points in the show.
All of that ranting over... how does any of this apply to Quaraun?
Quaraun has a relatively low IQ. He is described by characters he meets (and readers of the series) as being "too stupid to live"
Quaraun has High Functioning Autism, meaning "has an IQ over 75 and can speak in full sentences".
Throughout most of the series we see Quaraun as an older adult around 450 years old (equivalent to about a 45 to 50 year old Human).
Because he is an older adult, he has learned to adapt to his surroundings to some extent and thus for the most part he is able to "pass off" as fairly normal. As long as he's not asked to do anything with numbers or money or try to get him into a sustained conversation about anything, he tends to get by without people realizing he's rather stupid.
He can read and write quite well; in fact he can read and write far above the average. He can sew and embroider at a very advanced skill level, and is in fact a tailor before becoming a wizard. He ends up being a "wizard for hire" who specializes in sewing magic items for other wizards (capes, cloaks, robes, hats, bags of holding, etc.) (Do keep in mind that this character was originally created as a Dungeon's and Dragons character that I played as in RPG games for several years before I started writing novels about him.)
If one sticks to topics of fabric, sewing, embroidery, fashion, charging items with magic properties, growing roses, and casting spells, Quaraun can keep up with the conversation with no trouble at all. He will n fact dominate those conversations and tell you every aspect of those topics, and he will talk in endless monologue about them with no clue that he is boring everyone around him out of their minds.
Leave those topics, however, and Quaraun becomes wide eyed and clueless as to a thing you are saying to him. His dialogue will fall apart and devolve into a series of:
"Okay"
"Uh-uh"
"Okay"
"No."
"Okay"
"I don't know."
"Okay."
Ask him what you were talking about....
"Why are doing that? What did I just say?" BeaLuna asked.
"I don't know," Quaraun answered.
"You don't know?"
"I don't know."
"Why don't you know?"
"I don't know."
"You don't know why you don't know?"
"I don't know."
"How can you not know why you don't know?"
"I don't know."
"Do you ever listen to anything I say?"
"I don't know."
"Can you stop saying, I don't know!"
"I don't know."
"Unicorn!"
"Why yis yelling at me for?" the Phooka asked.
"Quaraun's broken again."
"Well, stop breaking him then."
"I didn't do anything."
"Ya talking over his head. Ya knows him too stupid to knows what yis talking on. Ya gone un gots hims brain all confusalcated. His brain can'na follows ya that fast."
"A Jelly Fish ate my brain," Quaraun said. "I don't have a brain."
"See?" Unicorn said. "Him agrees. Him have no brain. Problem solved, eh?"
BeaLuna walked off mumbling to herself: "I'm travelling with crazy people and idiots."
~From "The Journey Begins" (Volume 4 of The Quaraun Series)
What happened here was typical of most people with Autism. Quaraun could no longer understand the point BeaLuna was trying to make, so he "zoned out" and didn't hear much of what she was saying. She had just explained in great detail all the reason for not doing a thing, and as soon as she got done taking, Quaraun immediately did exactly what she had just got done telling him not to do. Thus she begins yelling at him, leaving him suddenly lost and confused and not knowing how he is supposed to answer. Unsure what the socially correct thing to do in this situation, he simply starts saying "I don't know" regardless of anything else the other characters say.
By saying "I don't know" he is actually saying that he doesn't know how to respond, he realizes he's done something wrong, but he's not certain what he did wrong, and is in fact attempting to explain that he doesn't know what it is he has done wrong, however, the characters around him do not understand this and assume he is answering the question being asked.
Quaraun is having trouble understanding BeaLuna, when she begins to turn the phrase "I don't know" back on him. He now is not only confused as to what he did wrong, but he also now does not knw what it is she is asking him.
Quaraun continues to say "I don't know" until he hears something that he does understand, which in this case is Unicorn talking about his brain. Quaraun immediately attempts to rejoin the conversation by saying the only thing he does know about the topic of his brain, which is the fact that he suffers from "Thullid Infestation" and has a tiny parasitic jellyfish attached to his brain eating it.
Quaraun does not realize that by saying "A jelly fish ate my brain" that other characters not think he's an idiot. He feels he has joined the conversation once again. When BeaLuna walks away calling Unicorn crazy and Quaraun an idiot, Quaraun is left confused and not understanding what it is he has done to upset her or make her call him an idiot.
Throughout the series Quaraun frequently becomes frustrated when he thinks he's talking to people around him, believing that he is conversing with them properly, then suddenly they call him "stupid", "dumb", "insane", or an "idiot". He knows those things are said with malice and the intent to hurt his feelings. He knows people use these words when they are angry with him. But he rarely is able to comprehend what it is he said or did to cause people to say those words to him.
Quaraun often joins conversations with others cheerfully, happy to be included as part of the group, but he often leaves those same conversations, confused, frustrated, sad, and upset.
Scenes like the one above, often end with the other characters leaving angrily, and Quaraun left alone feeling very much unloved, unwanted, and worthless and wishing he was smart enough for people to want to talk to him the same way they talk to each other.
Scenes with Quaraun sitting alone, separate from the group, wanting to join them, but too scared of being rejected, knowing they'll just laugh at him and call him an idiot, are frequent throughout the series.
I've never tried to determine what his IQ might be. I'd guess it's probably in the range of about 80.
In the few volumes where he is seen in his youth, you see him having greater difficulty interacting with people around him.
60% of all parents who self diagnosed their children have stated they hoped that by "convincing" their child they had Aspergers, they would "aspire to be more like Sheldon Cooper"; these people could not list the symptoms of Aspergers and simple stated it meant "being a genius".
Yeah, see everything I just said in my previous answer, before the novel excerpt. The same applies here.
More then 60% of mothers who self diagnose their children have Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy and the child turns out to have NO disorder AT ALL and is just a normal healthy child who is victim to a Hypochondriac mother, who gains attention from other mothers by pretending her child has the same illness as the mother she is trying to compete with.
Have you ever known someone with Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy? I have. My next door neighbour has it. (Yes, the woman who cut my car in half on May 10, 2010, while screaming that she was killing a demon and therefore had to kill me car. That woman.). There is not one damned thing wrong with her 3 boys. Nothing. They are 3 healthy, normal little boys.
One of her boys "disappeared" for a while. Never came outside any more. No one saw him. No one talked about hi. It was like he'd vanished.
I babysat for these boys. One day the parents are getting divorced, and want to know if I can take the boys to their doctor's appointments for the next few weeks.
I get to the doctor's office.
Doctor pulls me aside, sends the boys to a play room to play with toys while she talks to me: "Can I talk to you about the mother?"
The doctor explains to me the situation:
The boy who'd been missing (9 years old), had been forced to wear diapers, drink out of a baby bottle and sleep in a crib for the past several weeks. The mother claimed this was because the boy was constipated.
The doctor said: "At first I prescribed stool softeners. But then I noticed she was getting it refilled every 3 days and each bottle should have lasted a full month. So I called the pharmacy to change the prescription to a placebo, but didn't tell her."
The doctor continues to explain: "I tried talking to him (the boy) but he no longer talks. He's shut down. Hasn't said a single word in any visit. She (the mother) won't let him talk to me alone and he won't talk if she's in the room. I think something's wrong. You know the boys better then I do, have you noticed anything?"
I ask the doctor what the prescription bottle looks like, I say: "Is it a big gallon sized bottle filled with white powder?"
She says: "Yes, it is, why?"
I tell her: "For months, she (the mother) has been carrying these bottles with her everywhere she goes, never got a good look at them, but she said it was a prescription her doctor gave her for irritable bowel syndrome. About 2 months ago her doctor stopped renewing her prescription. She was in a rage at first, but now past few weeks, she has them again."
The boys doctor asked who the mother's doctor was. Went to call him and talked to him. She came back in the room. She says: "He diagnosed her with Paranoid Schizophrenia and Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy about 6 months ago. I just talked to their dad. He's in the middle of trying to have them taken away from her because she's making (the boy) sick on purpose so I'll give him the same prescription her doctor stopped giving her. I suspected something like that, that's why I switched it to a placebo."
I asked the doctor (a doctor who was a standard non-specialist pediatric a 2 hour drive away from the boys house) while I was there: "How many doctors do the boys have?"
She says: "What do you mean?"
I say: "You're the 5th pediatric I've taken them to in the past 3 days. They've got multiple appointments every day this week."
She asked for the names of the other doctors. Leaves again, Calls the doctors. Comes back in white as a ghost and says: "We've all been giving him the same prescription. She's been refilling all of them too fast and is using a different pharmacy for each one."
She than asks me: "Does she have multiple doctors for herself?"
I say: "32 in Maine that I know of, at least 7 in New Hampshire. She goes to every pharmacy in the state. Last I knew she was taking more then 40 different prescriptions all at once. She's got a big drug problem. I frequently drive her to her appointments and watch the boys in the waiting room, because she won't allow them out of her sight for more then a few minutes."
She goes off to call all of these doctors. None of them knew about any of the others. None of them were hooked up with that online database thing to prevent this sort of thing from happening either, likewise she was using "off grid" pharmacies.
Once all her doctors and all of her kids' doctors started cross referencing the situation... the boys' dad had custody about 2 weeks later.
Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy is a very serious condition and if the state can prove a parent has it, they WILL take the children away.
60% of all children who are self-diagnosed as Autistic or Aspergers by a mother... turn out to be healthy normal children of a mother with a serious prescription drug addiction, who uses her children to get prescriptions, which she takes herself, never giving said prescriptions to the child...
60% of all children who are self-diagnosed as Autistic or Aspergers by a mother... are taken away from their parents and put in foster care, due to the mother having Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy.
Once again we've had a side rant that is not connected to Quaraun or the series, so continuing on...
80% of all people claiming to be "Autistic Aspies" do not have either Aspergers or Autism and are shocked when they learn that Aspergers is NOT a "type" of Autism.
You can always tell a website or blog written by someone who has no clue what Autism is, as soon as you see them write:
"My son has the Aspergers type of Autism."
There is no such thing as an "Asperger's type of Autism".
There is Aspergers.
And there is Autism.
Two very different illnesses with similar symptoms.
Aspergers and Autism are so different from one another that you can be diagnosed with BOTH of them as well.
I had myself a long rant about this already, so go read that page and as there is nothing here to say in reference to Quaraun himself, let's move on...
The saddest part is that self-diagnosed Aspergers rose 6,000% the same month the TV show Big Bang Theory became "the most popular show on television"
That link I just put in the previous answer? Go read that to see what I have to say about this one.
This one again, does not apply to Quaraun because, he doesn't have Aspergers, and also because he lives in the 1400s before TV was around.
Of course time travel existes in the Quaraun series and GhoulSpawn (one of Quaraun's lovers) is in fact from the 1970s so does know of things like tv and such, even though Quaraun himself does not.
While Quaraun is from a time period before Autism was known about, there are in fact volumes in the series, where GhoulSpawn (who is from the future) calls Quaraun Autistic. There are scenes when other characters are watching Quaraun have a meltdown and are asking what's wrong with him, and GhoulSpawn will reply to say something like "He has Autism, this is what he does." However, being a man from the 1970s living in the 1400s, his explaining that "this is Autism" means nothing to the people around him, who then just think GhoulSpawn is as crazy as Quaraun because he's using words they never heard before.
Aspergers is an Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD)
Asperger's is NOT a "type" of Autism.
Autism Spectrum Disorder means "an illness that is commonly misdiagnosed as Autism, but is not Autism."
Yeah. That link again. I covered this there as well.
There are more the 60 ASDs including Alzheimer's, Parkinson's, Schizophrenia, Threadworm Infestation, and having had a Stroke.
Yep. The link. Just go to the link. My answer to this was there to.
73% of all ACTUALLY Autistic people, will never speak, will never learn to wipe their bum, will eat through a tube never learning how to chew, and will wear neck braces and be wheelchair bound from never learning to hold up their head or walk.
The 27% of Autistic people who can talk and walk and chew their own food, will rarely learn to speak in full sentences, will forever "act like a 4 year old" even into their senior years.
There are no known cases of anyone with ACTUAL Autism ever becoming fully independent or living on their own. REAL Autistics require caretakers and adult supervision their entire lives.
Quaraun falls into the same 27% as I do.
Like me, Quaraun has the ability to talk and can feed himself. Though like me he often forgets to do either.
Yes, you can forget to talk.
I've had times when a person was talking to me, and the conversation reached a pint of him saying:
"Why won't you answer me?"
To which I said: "What do you mean?"
"What do you mean what do you mean?"
"I've been answering you."
"No you haven't."
"Yes I have."
"Have not. You ain't said a word once."
Well, in my head I was talking to him, however, my brain forgot to make my mouth move and send the words out. This is actually a rather common problem for people with Autism, and Quaraun does it from time to tome in the novels.
Forgetting to eat can be a problem and it is one of the reasons I'm now in my 50s and still require adult supervision.
I can cook. I can cook really well. I took Culinary Arts in college. I can cook exceptionally well. I just have trouble remembering that I'm supposed to.
I frequently go 4 or 5 days or more between meals. I often reach a point where I am typing and my hand is trembling so much I can no longer type. I am then forced to stop typing.
I call Ben tell him: "My hand's shaking, what should I do?"
Ben instead says: "Where you been I haven't heard from you in 5 days?"
Me: "What do you mean? I just talked to you this morning?"
Ben: "No, that was Monday morning."
Me: "Ain't it Monday?"
Ben: "It's Friday."
Me: "Huh? I started typing after talking to you. I just stopped now. I thought it was only a couple of hours. That must be why my hand is shaking! I must be hungry! Boy! I'll bet I'm tired too."
Ben: "You forgot to sleep, for 5 days?"
Me: "I was writing."
Ben: "For 5 days?"
Me: "Apparently."
I do this sort of thing a few times a month. It's why I have to have caretakers and adult supervision, even at my age.
I forget to talk, during conversations.
I forget to eat.
I forget to sleep.
I forget to go use the toilet.
I've been known to go as much as 6 months between baths. I forget to do that as well.
I have dreadlocs. Guess who forgot to brush her hair for almost 3 years.
This is the reality of living with Autism.
This is what it is like to be ACTUALLY Autistic.
When you hear an Autism mother yelling at an Aspie mother and saying to the Aspie mother: "What are you complaining about, at least your kid can wipe his own bum!"
THIS is what those mothers are talking about.
I am High Functioning so eventually after a few days I notice my "stomach hurts" and I call Ben, tell him, and he'll be... "Have you eaten lately?"
I'll be: "Nope. It ain't that. I've got snacks here... oh I know! I haven't gotten up to go pee in a few days. That's what it is! I have to go pee! Yay! I know why my stomach hurts! I haven't peed in a few day. I gotta go do that."
Yes. I have Autism. And I forget to go pee. Sometimes for several days to a time.
Someone with High Functioning Autism can survive on their own, but without caretakers to check in on them, they will not thrive.
If your child has Autism, they will never have 100% independence.
Aspergers, yes. Most Aspies can live on their own without caretakers. But not Autistics. It's one of the biggest differences there is between Autism and Aspergers.
I have to have timers for everything.
A timer to tell me "Stop what you are doing and go eat."
A timer to tell me "Stop what you are doing and go pee."
A timer to tell me "Stop what you are doing and go sleep."
Are you someone who watches my YouTube videos?
Go watch my Witcher 3 Wild Hunt series of game play videos. You'll see it. Every 45 minutes a timer goes off, and I tell you... "Oh... it's time to go pee! I'll stop the game here and start another episode after I go pee."
I played 117 hours of that game in a single sitting.
Yes.
One sitting.
There are 117 45 minute episodes of me playing that game and every 45 minutes, at the end of every episode, that timer goes off, and I get up to go pee and eat a small mini-meal, Then come back and play through for another 45 minutes until the timer goes off again.
This is my life.
This is life with Autism.
Having a timer that goes off every 45 minutes is the only way I can remember to stop what I am doing and go use the damn toilet.
At least I am high functioning enough to wipe my bum myself. 73% of Autistic people require a caretaker to wipe their bums for them.
In the Quaraun series you see scenes where Quaraun forgets to eat, often for days on end, because I forget to eat.
You see Quaraun go days on end, walking across the country side not stopping to rest, forgetting he needs to sleep, because I forget to sleep.
The sleep issue is a frequent one, one that shows up in nearly every novel as well. It's a reoccurring theme in the Quaraun series, for Quaraun's days f no sleep to cause disruption in the lives of others who are trying to sleep and he's doing something that keeps them awake.
There are many scenes where Unicorn puts opium into Quaraun's food or drink, to mellow Quaraun out enough for him to at least collapse and be forced to rest in a drug induced stupor.
Quaraun woke up again many hours later. He felt the warm heat
of BoomFuzzy's body against his back, and Quaraun moved his body
towards the heat. Quaraun's eyelids were too heavy to open, so
Quaraun lay in the warmth, enjoying the closeness of feeling another
living being pressed close to him. Quaraun's mind couldn't seem to
focus, and he knew the eggnog BoomFuzzy had given him before bed, had
likely been drugged.
"Did you drug me?"
"Aye."
~From "BoomFuzzy" (Volume 3 of The Quaraun Series)
More then 90% of all Autistic people have a low IQ of under 75. Most are considered "mentally retarded" with IQs below 60.
Fewer then 10% of all Autistics are High Functioning.
High Functioning Autism, means:
"Has an IQ of 75 or more and can speak in phrases longer then 2 or 3 words, being able to communicate verbally in full sentences."
We already covered this one a couple of questions ago.
Your child can NOT be diagnosed with Autism, because there is no medical condition called "Autism".
Autism is a slang laymen's term for Kanner's Syndrome, a very rare birth defect caused by genetic mutation.
Raise your hand if you knew there was no disease, illness, or disorder actually named "Autism".
When a doctor says "Your child may be autistic", they DO NOT mean they are diagnosing your child with Autism.
They mean you child is displaying symptoms of Autism and likely has one of the 60+ ASDs.
If your child has one of the ASDs, this means your child DOES NOT have Autism, but has a disease with similar symptoms to Autism.
Yeah, raise your hand if you knew this one.
Doctors are extremely reluctant to give a diagnoses of Autism.
It is one of the single most difficult diagnosis to get from a doctor and requires your child be taken for multiple interviews WITH OUT THE PARENTS in the room.
If you TRULY believe your child was sexually traumatized before the age of 3 years old (and that is what Autism is) you will have your child undergo a series of hour long interviews ABOUT THEIR SEX LIFE with multiple social workers and psychiatrists.
It requires 3 psychiatrists to agree that the child is suffering from serious early childhood sexual abuse trauma, before they will consider giving a diagnosis of Autism.
An ACTUAL diagnosis of ACTUAL Autism is a very SERIOUS diagnosis that a doctor can not give lightly, as it also requires the doctor to immediately call the police and have the parents arrested for gross child neglect and extreme child sexual abuse.
When a child is diagnosed with REAL Autism, the child is immediately handed over to child protective services and the parents charged with criminal neglect and abuse.
If your did not receive criminal charges and have your child taken away the same day as the diagnosis, then you DID NOT receive a diagnosis of ACTUAL Autism.
Did you know Autism is caused by early childhood sexual abuse and/or extreme physical or psychological trauma?
Neither did most of the other parents proudly proclaiming themselves rapists, I mean parents of an Autistic child.
Wait... do you mean.... you REALLY didn't know that every time you proudly wave your puzzle piece flag and say "My kid has Autism, YAAAAAY!", that you are also proudly telling the world you sexual abused your child?
A diagnosis of Autism is nothing to be proud of.
Rape is not something to be proud of
Being a parents who rapes your infant is not something to be proud of.
Your child having a psychosis that is caused by having been raped by one of their caretakers before they reached 3 years of age, is nothing to be proud of.
While you are proudly waving your puzzle piece flag, why don't you also get your son a shirt that says:
"My mom raped me before I was 3 years old! I got Autism now, YAAAAY! Rape is the greatest! Go rape go! Ya for rape! Rape those babies! Let's get more Autism in the world! Woo-ho! Ain't child rape the greatest, it gave me Autism! Yay!"
Can you see how, horrible, sick, and disgusting it is, for you to call yourself "A proud Autism mom!"?
ooooh! You didn't child rape was the cause of Autism? I thought you were this great big expect on Autism.
OOooooh my! Somebody didn't do their homework before they self-diagnosed their child with Autism! Imagine that.
Oh wait... you only know about Aspergers.
I'm sorry, I didn't realize you were too retarded to know Aspergers was not a "type" of Autism. Silly me, here I am the one with the low IQ. How stupid of me for thinking someone with an IQ higher then mine actually knew something about Autism. I mean, I'm just the stupid little retard who actually HAS Autism, so what do I know?
Hey, here's an idea, why don't you get your head out of Sheldon Cooper's ass and actual find out what Autism is. Huh? How about that.
Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to find out who in the hell this Sheldon Cooper was that every body kept talking about at all the Autism Awareness events the past couple of years?
Why was it hard?
Oh let me think... I have Autism, and everything that implies.
If you knew what "everything that implies" meant, I wouldn't have to explain why I didn't know who Sheldon Cooper was.
There's a little thing called: no TV, you know, because might bring Satan into the house.
There's also a little thing called: no electricity, you know, because Satan made it.
Then there's that little thing called: child sex slavery and being locked in a room, from the time I was 8 until I was 31, and only allowed out when the High Priests from the Saco Ward LDS Church showed up looking to fuck a baby.
Yeah... I have Autism... REAL Autism... and EVERYTHING that implies.
While you and your children were happily glorifying your TV shows, I was being raped by the highest bidding High Priest.
While your 3 year old was learned her first words, I was being beaten with a nail filled board for not being able to recite the entire book of Genesis in under an hour.
While your 8 year old was worrying about losing her first tooth, I was worrying about losing my first baby during my first miscarriage.
I have Autism, Sugar Plum, and your child's nothing but a damned tv worshiping spoiled brat who wants to "be special just like Sheldon".
You think your child has Autism because your child has a High IQ and is socially awkward? ... Honey, those are not even symptoms of Autism. Why don't you get your head out of the TV and stop re-tweeting memes, long enough to read an actual medical text book. A few Psychology books, maybe?
Try finding out what Autism is before you start diagnosing your children with such a horrifying disease.
Autism is not nice.
Autism is not fun.
Autism is not something to run around all yippie skippies happy about.
Autism is a horrible psychosis that could easy be prevented if perverted adults would stop sexually abusing children.
And yes, I was taken away from my parents at the time of my diagnosis, at the age of 31 years old. It was later realized that my parents were victims as well.
My uncles are now wanted by the FBI for child sex slavery and human trafficking.
Let's see if we can get back on topic... how does this apply to the Quaraun series and writing a fictional character with Autism?
I actually have already written an answer covering this topic over on the page titled: Suicide, Rape, and Abuse In The Quaraun Series. You can go read that for a very long answer.
The short(er) answer is that: I write what I know and I know rape very well. I have never, not once in my entire life, ever had consensual sex with anyone. I don't know what it would be like to have sex with someone and them not be raping me.
I therefore also do not know how to write a sex scene that is kind, loving, consensual, and not rape.
I have Autism and am unable to imagine what it would be like to experience something that I had not myself experienced.
No one has ever hugged me.
No one.
Not my parents. Not the men who raped me. And I've never had a friend, so obviously no friends have ever hugged me either. I don't know how to write a hug. Because I've never experienced a hug to know what it feels like.
No one has ever kissed me.
No one.
Not my parents. Not the men who raped me. And I've never had a friend, so obviously no friends have ever kissed me either. I don't know how to write a kiss. Because I've never experienced a kiss to know what it feels like.
The only sex I've ever experienced was rape and so I don't know how to write a sex scene outside of a rape scene.
There is a lot of sex in the Quaraun series. But it's all rape.
Quaraun never experiences kind, loving, consensual sex. He only ever experiences rape.
He never knows what it is like to enjoy sex. Because I don't know what it is like to enjoy sex.
He only knows what it is like to experience fear an pain during sex, because I only know what it is like to experience fear and pain during sex.
In the Quaraun series sex and abuse take center stage.
Right from the beginning of his life.
His earliest memory is of him being attacked and injured along side his mother.
His strongest memory is witnessing his mother's murder a few years later, while he is still a small child.
Quaraun's mother was beaten to death by his father, who then turned on the small boy and would have killed him as well, except an uncle intervened.
As a teenager, he is near daily beaten by his father and his father's servants.
When his father is angry with him, he drags Quaraun (still a child) out into the center of town, strips him naked, and publicly beats him. (Keeping in mind the series is set in the 1400s when this sort of thing was so common that town squares had special tables made just for holding the child [or spouse] down while you whipped them. It was considered a form of entertainment and huge crowds gathered to watch these events.) Quaraun is publicly tortured and humiliated every few weeks throughout most of his childhood and teen years.
Like I was in real life, Quaraun was frequently locked in a tiny room, left to go days on end without food.
Like I was, Quaraun often had to fight the dogs for scraps.
Like I was, Quaraun was made to sit on the floor and not allowed to eat at the table with his family.
Like I was, Quaraun was often stabbed in the arm with forks, if he dared try to sneak food from the table.
Like I was, Quaraun was little more then a skeleton, malnourished, and starving to death.
Like I was, Quaraun was rescued from his abusive family, by a sex crazed rapist, who was just as sexually abusive to him as his family had been physically abusive.
Yes.
Quaraun's backstory matches his psychosis.
Yes.
Quaraun's childhood, is the childhood that real Autistics have.
Because Autism has become "a fad", many parents, teachers, and even social workers, are quick to suggest a child be submitted to psychiatric evaluation for Autism, often without knowing what that really means or what the evaluation process involves.
Because the parents are not present during the interviews and the child is instructed to NOT reveal to his parents any of the questions asked by the psychiatrists, few parents or teachers are ever fully aware of the extremely sexual nature of the interview questions that their toddler is being asked to answer.
Because the Quaraun series is set in the 1400s this does not apply to him.
However, I do wish, parents would do a little bit better research before sending their children for Autism interviews with Psychiatrists. Your 3 year old is gonna come out of those interviews with a better sex education then a Porn star has. Until you've had to sit through their 100 question sessions about your sex life, you can't even begin to image how intensely an Autism evaluation invades a persons sex life history.
Before you send your child for an Autism evaluation, you might want to step back and consider... is the amount of sexual trauma your child will experience during that interview, worth the diagnosis they may not get?
Autism is caused by sexual trauma and those Autism evaluation questions are designed to find out HOW MUCH sexual trauma your child has been through. If your child has never been sexual traumatized... they certainty will be by the time those Autism evaluation interviews are over.
Doctors actually trained in what REAL Autism ACTUAL is, are very reluctant to submit a young child to the psychological evaluation process because of the highly sexual nature of the questions, which can in fact trigger sexual trauma in a child that was not previously sexually traumatized.
What this means is the evaluation process for Autism, can actually CAUSE Autism in a non-Autistic child.
Yeah. That's what I was just talking about in my previous answer.
Many symptoms of ASDs go away over time, either on their own or with changes to medication, diet, and lifestyle.
ACTUAL Autism is a type of mental retardation, and is a severely crippling lifelong condition. It's symptoms do not lesson or go away with time.
If your child is diagnosed with REAL, ACTUAL Autism aka as an Idiot Savant, your doctor will say: "Your child has Kanner's Syndrome", they will NOT say "Your child has Autism"
Symptoms of Kanner's Syndrome are:
- a profound lack of affect or emotional contact with others
- an intense wish for sameness in routines
- muteness or abnormality of speech
- fascination with manipulating objects
- high levels of visuo-spatial skills, but major learning difficulties in other areas
- attractive, alert and intelligent appearance (meaning does not physically look retarded even though they are)
- mental retardation
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
- Stupor
- Mutism
- Hyperactivity
- Agitation
- Excitement
- Posing
- Negativism
- Rigidity
- Waxy flexibility
- Automatic obedience
- Combativeness (during excitement)
- Stereotypies
- Tics
- Grimacing
- Echolalia
- Echopraxia
- Perseveration
- Verbigeration
- Staring
- Withdrawal
- Immobility
- Challenging behaviour
- Tremor
- Slowness
- Amotivation
- Grasp reflex
- Mannerism
- Gaze fixation
- Choreoathetoid movements of the trunk and extremities
- Autonomic instability (during excitement)
- Cannot start actions
- Cannot stop actions (if during excitement episodes needs acute psychiatric care)
- Freezing
- Impulsivity
- Bizarre/psychotic
- Sleep problems
- Urinary or Fecal incontinence
- Odd gait
- Passivity
- Reversal of day and night
- Eyerolling
- Stiff muscles
- Catalepsy
- Physiological pillow
- Difficulty crossing lines
- Gegenhalten
- Mitgehen
- Mitmachen
- Ambitendency
- Rituals
The symptoms do not lesson, change, or go away over time.
Autism is always easily recognized.
Autism is considered rare and uncommon.
Was identified in 1932.
That is a really long one and is also the one I wanted to comment on the most in regards to writing any Autistic character in general, but especially Quaraun in particular. The second part of that list is very long and most of the words on it I have never heard before and do not know what they are, so will have to look up the meanings to find out what they are. They did provide links, which I think go to Wikipedia? Not sure. I have not checked the links yet to find out where they go to.
Because this one is so long, I think I need to divide it up by parts. Let's also put an outline around it so you know where these start and stop...
Symptoms of Kanner's Syndrome are:
- a profound lack of affect or emotional contact with others
This is one of the ones I do not know what it means...
a profound lack of affect
What does that mean?
I tried Googling it and all I get back are results for "What is the Difference Between Affect and Effect?"
So I have no clue what this one means. What in the heck is "a profound lack of affect"?
The next part is:
emotional contact with others
Again, what does that mean?
Is it that whoever wrote this list has horrific grammar and the
"affect or" should not be there?
I'm thinking that whoever wrote this list made some type of error there and that the only way to determine what they mean is to remove the "affect or". So let's try that and see if maybe we can make some sense of this.
- a profound lack of emotional contact with others
This is very true. There is absolutely no one in my life who wants to show me any form of emotion at all, what so ever.
My dad is like a robot, completely devoid of any emotion at all, and my mom is an intensely violent, very volital, hot tempered, always screaming, non-stop yelling, getting into violent fights with everyone, spit fire hell cat ready to claw the eyes out of anyone (literally - she's attempted to do so to several people now.) She gets arrested for beating people in the head with bricks and stuff.
I don't think my dad has any emotions at all and I don't think my mom has any emotion other then extreme violent rage.
All three of my brothers have "turned off" as of April 10, 2015. Our cats were the only emotional support any of us had.
Our cats were the only friends we had. Without the cats me and my 3 brothers have no one. Since the kidnapping of the cats, and their heads being returned nailed to our do a month later, all 3 of my brothers have stopped talking.
None of them has smiled since April 10, 2015.
None of them has laughed since April 10, 2015.
None of them has barely said a full sentence since April 10, 2015.
That was almost 3 years ago.
My 3 brothers are intensely traumatized by what was done to their cats.
Our mother does not allow us to have friends.
I escaped the clan. Two of my brothers are still trapped in it. The cats were the only friends they had. Now they have no one.
Because I escaped the clan, I've not been allowed (by the clan) to have contact with my brothers.
My uncles run the clan. There is no love in any of them. Sex and money is all they know, all they do. Sell children for sex so they can have more money. Nothing else matters to them.
I've never had a Human friend before. I wouldn't know where to look for one.
- a profound lack of emotional contact with others
So, yes, this one is very true. There is a profound lack of emotional contact with others in my life. I don't know how I would go about finding some one to have emotional contact with.
My cats were the only friends and emotional support I've ever had. Evil men killed them. Now I have no one at all.
Symptoms of Kanner's Syndrome are:
- an intense wish for sameness in routines
Symptoms of Kanner's Syndrome are:
- muteness or abnormality of speech
I had normal speech at first.
I was 8 when the shoot out happened between the Atwater clan and the Cyr clan. One of the Cyrs shoot a kid's eye out of his head. He was standing right beside me. The kid to the other side of me, my cousin Murphy... he had his head cut off July 2013. That big white cross at the corner of Cascade Rd and Ross Rd? That's what's left of him there.
At 14
Symptoms of Kanner's Syndrome are:a profound lack of affect or emotional contact with others
- fascination with manipulating objects
Does this mean line taking all 300,000 of my books off the shelf and lining them up from one end of my dad's apartment to the other, then putting then all back on the shelf?
Or like spending 10 or 12 hours sorting my many thousands of Crayola Big Boxes?
Or spending hours drawing thousands of circles in the sand on the beach, for all 7 miles of the beach?
Mixing paint colours on a palet for no reason, with absolutely no intention of painting anything, just doing it because I can watch paint colours mix and swirl for hours.
Squeezing playdough. Kinectic sand. Foam squish putty. Silly putty. Gelly tubes.
My current favorite toy is seen in nearly every one of my youtube videos: a 12" rainbow wand filled with oil and glitter. I flip it and twirl it for hours.
Or picking up every moonsnail on the beach even though the beach is 7 miles long and I went past my 10lb weight limit (doctors orders) many hours ago but I can't stop picking up moonsnails anyways.
Or spending 4 years gluing 2.5million marbles to my car? (started this at age 37...)
How about spending 8 years handsewing one hair at a time a 14 foot long mokomoko for an insanely over the top Lord Sesshomaru CosPlay?
Sitting on the beach, for hours on end, doing nothing but sifting sand through my fingers and being utterly fascinated with the sensation of the sand on my skin.
Collecting 5,000+ stuffed animals and teddy bears, and setting aside a day each week, to do nothing but hug every one of them. Sometimes doing it more then once a week, because I don't have any one to hug me and if I didn't have 5,000+ teddy bears I would never have felt a hug at all. (And this is recently added one, I actually started doing this one in my 40s. I used to have cats to hug every day. Actually, I used to hug each cat every hour of every day. I've only been amassing thousands of teddy bears to hug in the past 2 years since my cats were murdered.)
Bela: April 8, 2015 - 2 days before she was kidnapped. You are looking at a GIANT 30lb cat. Yep... that's the cat everyone used to talk about... the one people thought was a panther, you can how monster sized she was. She was bigger then a Cocker Spaniel.
Symptoms of Kanner's Syndrome are:
- high levels of visuo-spatial skills, but major learning difficulties in other areas
I have no clue what visuo-spatial skills means... off to ask Google...
...
Nope...
I still don't know what it means... I'll have to look into this more and come back to it later once I figure out what it means so I know how to translate it.
I am unable to tell you if I have this or not as I do not know what it is.
I can therefore also not tell you if Quaraun has it or not.
I will come back and edit this with a better answer once I've figured out what visuo-spatial skills means.
Symptoms of Kanner's Syndrome are
- attractive, alert and intelligent appearance (meaning does not physically look retarded even though they are)
Nope. I do not have any of the facial deformities normally associated with mental retardation.
Neither does Quaraun.
Symptoms of Kanner's Syndrome are:
- mental retardation
As soon as people find out I have Autism, the first thing they say is: "Oh, so you must have a High IQ right?"
No. I high IQ is NOT a symptom of Autism.
A low IQ and mental retardation is a symptom of Autism.
So what is my IQ?
My general overall score of all topics combined, including ability to preform basic life skills is 75
My Reading, Writing, and Grammar score is 221 (highest score in the State of Maine - 3 colleges and MENSA all cross tested me, I scored 221 on each other their tests)
My Biology, Earth, and Nature Sciences is 138
Physics and Technical sciences 40
Maths 65
Those are the two highest IQ categories and the two lowest IQ categories, side by side so you can see the variation in range.
Everything else was in a 70 to 90 range.
You can see where my savant skills are, when you look at the two categories that ranked super high.
When my Writing score came back as 221, the school had me retake the test because they thought there must have been an error. When I came back with 221 the second time they decided I must have cheated so had me take it a 3rd time with a bunch of teachers gathered all around me to watch me do it.
When it came back 221 the 3rd time they called a college and asked them to come give me a different version of the test. It was still 221.
That college contacted yet another college. Still 221.
MENSA was contacted. It was still 221.
MENSA tried a different test. It was still 221.
Harvard University was contacted, they said it's one of the top 10 highest IQ scores of any category, ever in history; they said I could attend their college if I could pass the entrance tests... $33k per semester, all semesters, all the way to a PhD in English Literature... paid scholarship, because Harvard has a glut lust for any one with a mega high IQ ... IF I could pas the entrance examines... with a Math IQ of 65 and a Physics IQ of 40, and an overall IQ of 75, I can not pass their entrance tests, in spite of an IQ of 221 in Writing, Reading, and Grammar.
THIS is what a high IQ in Autism looks like.
It is NOT an overall high IQ... it is one super mega high IQ in ONE SINGLE TOPIC ONLY, with an abnormally mega low IQ in every other topic.
This is Savant Autism.
I am very, very, very, very good at one topic and one topic only and mentally retarded in every other area.
I published my first book, at the age of 3 years old, by the way.
My Spelling IQ is 75 by the way. I can't spell worth shit, but I can write. Boy can I ever write. You probably noticed that some few tens of thousands of words ago.
If you've read the Quaraun books, you see this in him as well. He can read and write far above and beyond everyone around him. He can sew elaborate costumes (as can I) and he knows the word of plants and animals inside out and can name every plant and bird he sees... as can I...
Like me, Quaraun is well versed in Necromancy and Voodoo (I'm a Voodoo Priestess rank of Mesden Fey Marija Loa to Damballa Wedo, by the way)...
Quaraun by the way is an ACTUAL Necromancer (also known as a Medium) by the real world definition of the word and NOT the Fantasy definition of the word... meaning he talks to dead spirits, communicates to ghosts, etc. as opppsed to resurecting zombies and building undead armies.
One of the complaints a few readers had with the series was they thought he was a fantasy style necromancer so they expected him to be doing dark bloody rituals, digging up graves and creating undead minions... they were not aware he was a Necromancer, like in the real world and spends his days staring into crystal balls asking questions to dead people for clients. Which, I also do, in case you were wondering... I do the whole card reading, ouji boards, pendulums, etc thing, which is why I have Quaraun doing it. It goes back to me writing what I know.
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Okay, so we've reached the 2nd half of the list. The part that has links. I'm glad they put links in this, so I can hopefully find out what each of these things means, because most of the stuff on this list I have no clue what it is.
Stupor... I don't know what that means. Let's click the link and see where it goes...
Stupor (From Latin stupere, "be stunned or amazed") is the lack of critical mental function and a level of consciousness wherein a sufferer is almost entirely unresponsive and only responds to base stimuli such as pain. Those in a stuporous state are rigid, mute and only appear to be conscious, as the eyes are open and follow surrounding objects.
... a catatonic stupor
Ah! Yes. I do know what this is.
Catatonia, aka the waking coma, which I mentioned at some point in this article, though I don't know now which page it ended up on as I've had to cut this article into smaller parts due to it having gotten so long.
No. I do not have this and neither does Quaraun.
I once meet a person who had this. It's a somewhat shocking thing to see.
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Now this one I know and have. And Quaraun has it as well.
I can and do, go days, sometimes weeks on end without saying a word.
I have Selective Mutism as well. Which means I'll be in the middle of talking and my brain, suddenly and without my permission, turns my vocal cords off and refuses to allow sound to come out of my mouth.
You see it on several of my YouTube vlogs.
I'm alone. Me and the camera. No one else. I can talk more or less normally.
Then, someone walks up to me and BOOM, my voice is completly gone. It's like a vacumme cleaner hose suddenly went down my throat and sucked out my voice and ran away with it, and left me struggling for air and not able to breath.
You know how in the Little Mermaid the Witch takes the mermaid's voice and no matter how much she tries to talk, she can't. It's just like that.
The person leaves and BOOM, my voice comes back, and I pick up talking to the camera like nothing happened.
There are exactly 7 people with whom I am able to talk to face to face without any trouble at all.
In college I could talk to teachers one on one after class, but could not talk to teachers during class while sitting in class. I could not talk to students at all in class or outside of class.
In public situations, such as attending a Convention, my ability to talk is somewhat in the middle - I CAN talk, but it's stuttered or slurred.
When talking to MOST people, I have episodes where I get stuck on a word and can't get past it... it sounds like this...
"It, it, it, it, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, sounds, llllllll.... li. li. li. liiiiiiii. lik. k. k.k .k .k. k. k. k. k. like... like... th... th... thi... thi... thiss... THIS!"
This is a language tic.
Now Quaraun doesn't do it in the novels, but GhoulSpawn does. GhoulSpawn often has trouble getting to the end of a sentence without getting stuck on a word half way through.
How does GhoulSpawn stop the stuck word and get past it? The same way I do.... grab a book and wallop himself in the side of the head. It reset his brain and lets him finish the sentence.
Why?
I have no clue.
It's like, my brain is a record player and the needle got stuck in a scratch and is just skipping and repeating the same word. When that happens you give the record player a shake, the arm bumps up over the scratch and song finishes playing.
My brain does the same damned thing and I don't know why.
I'm in the middle of talking,talking, talking, talking, talking ...slam myself in the head with a book... and now I can finish the damn sentence.
I don't know why my brain sometimes gets stuck on a word or why jostling my brain makes it reset and moves on like nothing happened.
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
I have this on some levels, but it's not to the point of my ever being diagnose with ADD/ADHD.
One of my brothers had ADHD as a child but it lessened with age. He still has it but it's kind of "stabilized".
He was a runner. And a climber.
At 2 years old, if you couldn't find him... run to the farthest and tallest tree from the house and look up, usually the giant pine about a 1/4 mile away, he was probably up there in the top some 50 to 60 feet up. Giggling, laughing hysterically, and at about 20 feet up he'd jump screaming "catch me! weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
If you woke up in the middle of the night to Thumptiy, Thump, Thump... that would be my brother, 3 years old, on the roof of the house, throwing firewood down the chimney.
Age 4 at doctor's office, nurse calls his name: "Ha ha! You can't catch me!" he laughs as he rips his cloths off and runs naked out the building and into the parking lot... 2 hours, several miles, and many exhausted adults later, he's finally caught and dragged to his appointment.
6 years old, we are in the ER, explaining to the doctor how it is my brother came to have a piece of wood, about an inch in diameter, skewered through his foot.
"He jumped of the roof into the wood pile..."
"Why was he on the roof?"
"He has ADHD..."
"Oooooooh!" Doctor nods. "I have one of those."
Same brother, now 27 years old. PokemonGo addict. Walks 16 miles a day to catch them all. If you can't find him... there's an old mill... giant 1800s brick factory, Pepperal Mill, if you live in Biddeford, you know it and it's famous 75 foot tall smoke stack. Several hundred rooms, a building that covers more then a mile. 5 stories tall. Can't find my brother. On the back of that mill, hanging over the Saco River, there's a ladder to scare the bravest of men shitless... go climb it... you'll find my brother on the roof of the mill, frantically catching Pokemon.
You know how I found him? He didn't come home one day. Whole family went into a panic. Every one was pacing his known Pokemon rought. I'm walking by the mill. I stop and point to the 75 foot tall smoke stack and comment:
"Boy I'm glad he got over his climbing thing."
We continue on a few feet. I stop walking. I look at my other brother whose with me. We both look up at that massive 75 foot tall chimney.
"I ain't climbing up that" he says shaking his head.
"Here, watch Marcy," I hand him my dog.
I'm scared of hieghts. But 20 minutes later... I'm looking down over the entire city of Biddeford, and there's my brother....waaaaaay up there.
"Watcha doing up here?"
He answers in hyper mile a minute speed...
"There's-Pokemon-everywhere! I-gotta-get'em-all. They're rare ones! No one has these. Look! I've got..." he starts listing them off in giddy hyper excitement... "I've caught 25 in the last hour, they're every where up here!"
His eyes are round with the wild ADHD gleeful mania of the discovery of a Pokemon goldmine hiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh over the top of Biddeford.
I've known several people with varying levels of hyperness, but my brother has everybody else beat. He can make other people with ADHD look calm. And he still runs. You still can't catch him.
He has an actual diagnosis from a doctor.
That's something I've noticed that's different with him than with others. Most people SAY they have ADHD, but most also say they are self diagnosed.
Now my brother, he has an actual diagnosis and medication for it and stuff. He acts REALLY, EXTREMELY different from people who say they self diagnosed themselves.
Most times wen people say they have ADHD, my response is: "Really? You don't act like it." And then they say "Well, I took this test online and it says I have it..."
No... I grew up with someone who ACTUALLY has ADHD, I guarantee, no online test is needed to tell if you have it.
He could run none stop for hours and... it wasn't like he was running because he wanted too... he couldn't control it, and he would literally run until he collapsed from exhaustion.
From age 2 to about age 15 or so... he did this weird thing, where, if he was required to sit down for a long period of time (for example going to church services) as soon as he was allowed to move, he'd jump up, let out a loud whooping yell, then start running, and just run back and forth, really, really, really, wicked, super fast. Scream again, Wave his arms frantically in the air, Scream a few more times. Continue running like a mad man. Stop to kick a few walls. Jump up on tables and chairs, Continue running. Climb up on the roof. Frantically run some more. Jump back down on the ground. Run circles around the building. Kick a few doors. Scream again. Run out to the parking lot. Jump up on the car, Yell at the top of his lungs. Run frantically as if his life depended on it to the nearest tree. Climb to the top. Scream again.
After a half hour or so of that, he'd come back, acting calm and normal again and say:
"There, I got it out."
When asked why he did it, he'd say:
"I don't know. I just had to get it out of me. I was gonna burst if I didn't."
For a short while the doctor thought he might have also had Toureets, but, then he said, "No. It's just ADHD. He's just more hyper then most."
People talk about childhood temper tantrums... well... have you ever seen a ADHD meltdown? Imagine 10 Autistic children all having a meltdown at once, put them on stedoids, and you still haven't got anything even close to an ADHD meltdown.
But the time a 5 year old with an ADHD meltdown is over: every glass item in the house will be smashed, ever doll will have it's head ripped off, every item of clothen owned by everybody in the family will be torn to itty bitty pieces, all the windows will be smashed out of the house, most of the furniture will have the stuffing ripped out, and the only reason it will have stopped, is because he finally threw himself on the floor, held his breath until he turned purple and passed out.
And it wasn't because he wanted anything or was angry, it wasn't a temper tantrum and he had no control over it... at times it seemed to terrify him, as though he was trying to stop, but was being thrown around by outside forces ... it was a result of sensory over stimulation.
And then, after, when you ask him: why did you do it, he shrugs and says "I don't know. It was like there was a monster inside of my trying to get out. I couldn't stop it, I tried, but it wouldn't stop no matter what I did."
(Several people who saw it, said it looked like demon possession, and our mother actually took to calling in exorcists to cast out demons. Several different priests came over the years to cast out "his demon".)
As it turned out... playing music too loud triggered it... our mother had a habit of playing music on mega loud speakers to annoy the Cyrs next door (which is why I'm almost deaf; she daily played music full blast and damaged my ear drums; my mom and the Cyrs have a viscous, often violent feud going on, but I don't know why it started before I was born so I've never known what they are fighting about; before the 1990s they used to shoot at each other; my mom's kind of crazy)... but the music triggered something in his brain... it was described by the doctor as being similar to epilepsy.
An ADHD meltdown has more in common with an epileptic seizure then a temper tantrum, which I didn't know until I saw one happen. And if you've never seen an ADHD meltdown in person, you can't even begin to imagine how bad they can get.
The meltdowns went away after around 12 years old. Replaced by pacing.
Pacing.
He can not sit down to eat, and carries his meal in a bowl, eating while he walks from one end of his apartment to the other.
He can not use a computer because he can not sit down long enough, and so instead has one of those computer-type cell phones so he can browse the internet while he walks from room to room.
Soon as he tries to sit down his feet start tapping and moving in place. His hands started grabbing and touching everything.
He got a treadmill so he could walk in place while doing things that he needs to be stationary for.
When trying to find his first job, he took job placement tests to match your ideal job to your personality, he scored high in fast food places where he could be on his feet and constantly moving around. So that's the job he went looking for. His first job was at a fast food place... he's still there, he loves it... he can walk all day long, chatter obsessively with his co-workers and the customers in a steady non-stop hyper chatter; he now trains the new people there; he will likely stay there forever and work his way up to management, as the hyper fast environment suits his hyper need for movement.
So, while I have some mild hyperactivity, I've never considered myself a hyper person, because I've seen first hand what ADHD is like and I'm nothing like that at all.
As such, Quaraun is not portrayed as being hyperactive.
However, his Unicorn is excessively hyper. Unicorn very clearly has ADHD on extreme levels. Like my brother, Unicorn has random outbursts of screaming and running around the room kicking things for no reason at all, other then he "has to get it out."
Unicorn is rarely shown as stopping to sit or rest. When other characters stop to rest, Unicorn is described as "pacing circles around the outer edge of the camp".
When Quaraun forces Unicorn to sit down, Unicorn starts poking Quaraun with his finger or grabs a stick and starts poking the fire, or starts throwing rocks at GhoulSpawn.
When the group is walking/hiking, Unicorn is often described as "trotting far ahead of the group, then galloping back as fast as he could, running past them, swinging back around and running back ahead of them again, whinnying like rabid pony as he went."
Upon passing a Human village, Unicorn is frequently described as "galloping wildly into the village, stabbing people with his horn as he went, stamping his hooves on children, and prancing merrily on the entrails of his victims". When asked by one of the group, why he does this to every Human village they past, he replies: "It must be done. I can'na not does it."
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
- Combativeness (during excitement)
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
- Choreoathetoid movements of the trunk and extremities
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
- Autonomic instability (during excitement)
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
- Cannot start actions
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
- Cannot stop actions (if during excitement episodes needs acute psychiatric care)
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
Someone with Autism has ALL of the symptoms above and one or more of the symptoms below (and can have all of the symptoms below):
The first known case of Autism was Victor de l'Aveyron, a feral child discovered living in the forest, had grown up without any form of human contact, and never spoke in 1801 by French physician Jean Marc Gaspard Itard.
Prior to the 1970s it was assumed that ALL Autistic children were "feral children" whom had been serverly neglected and or abused and had on some levels raised themselves without the normal guidance of a parent.
Many psychiatrists ACTUALLY TRAINED in diagnosing REAL Autism, even today in 2017 are reluctant to give a diagnoses of Autism to any child that can not also be considered "a Feral Child", thus why ACTUAL Autism diagnosis are so rare.
I am diagnosed as both "A Feral Child" and "Autistic Savant". I grew up in the Ross Forest of Old Orchard Beach with very little Human contact; I was 31 years old before I had what is considered to be any form of "normal interaction with American society." I did not start speaking in full sentences or American English until I was 37 years old, after being trained to do so by a College Professor who was trained in teaching Autistic children to talk.
I was also classified as having suffered the following:
- Supervisory neglect: characterized by the absence of a parent or guardian. (My mother attended 15 different churches of as many denominations, she spent up to 15 hours a day, up to 5 days a week, in church buildings - I was either left in the care of my sexually abusive uncles/her brothers, or left to hide in the Ross Forest, thus how I came to spend most of my days with the local hermit known as Etiole.)
- Physical neglect: characterized by the failure to provide the basic physical necessities, such as a safe and clean home; (I often went days between meals, was not allowed to eat at the table, often had to fight 8 large dogs for my food, and was frequently kept locked in a room that had ledge "floor", 1 inch wide spaces between roof boards allowing rain and snow to come in, had boards nailed over the windows, had more then a dozen padlocks on the door, and boards full if 8" long nails was left on the floor [see photos of the room here] Being locked in this room was often a form of punishment for such "crimes" as saying "I'm hungry, can I have something to eat.")
- Medical neglect: characterized by the lack of providing medical care; (I was taken to a pediatric from birth to age 8; between 8 and 31 I was allowed to go to the emergency room 8 times; during those years I suffered 7 miscarriage, multiple injuries, and many serious infections, none of which I was allowed to go to the hospital for. Because of the state of the room I was kept looked in [see photos here] I new suffer from "stacibotrin poisoning" and have crippling life-long respiratory and sinus problems)
- Emotional neglect: characterized by a lack of nurturance, encouragement and support; (Asking for a hug was punishable by being beaten with one of the boards full of nails; not being able to recite the books of the Bible and Book of Mormon fast enough could result in not food for a week; forgetting to say my hourly prayers, could result in being sold to one of the Saco ward LDS church high priests as his sex slave for the day.)
- Educational neglect: characterized by the caregivers lack to provide an education and additional resources to actively participate in the school system; (My mother removed me from school at the age of 8 on grounds of "The government controls the school, Satan controls the government, no child off mine will be taken by Satan.")
- Abandonment: when the parent or guardian leaves a child alone for a long period of time without a babysitter. (I was frequently -3 to 5 days a week -left looked in the car during hot summer evenings for upto 12 hours to a time, while my mother did karaoke in bars with her sister Barbie Jean)
I am diagnosed as both "A Feral Child" and "Autistic Savant". I grew up in the Ross Forest of Old Orchard Beach with very little Human contact; I was 31 years old before I had what is considered to be any form of "normal interaction with American society." I did not start speaking in full sentences or American English until I was 37 years old, after being trained to do so by a College Professor who was trained in teaching Autistic children to talk.
I was also classified as having suffered the following:
- Supervisory neglect: characterized by the absence of a parent or guardian. (My mother attended 15 different churches of as many denominations, she spent up to 15 hours a day, up to 5 days a week, in church buildings - I was either left in the care of my sexually abusive uncles/her brothers, or left to hide in the Ross Forest, thus how I came to spend most of my days with the local hermit known as Etiole.)
I was also classified as having suffered the following:
- Physical neglect: characterized by the failure to provide the basic physical necessities, such as a safe and clean home; (I often went days between meals, was not allowed to eat at the table, often had to fight 8 large dogs for my food, and was frequently kept locked in a room that had ledge "floor", 1 inch wide spaces between roof boards allowing rain and snow to come in, had boards nailed over the windows, had more then a dozen padlocks on the door, and boards full if 8" long nails was left on the floor [see photos of the room here] Being locked in this room was often a form of punishment for such "crimes" as saying "I'm hungry, can I have something to eat.")
I was also classified as having suffered the following:
- Medical neglect: characterized by the lack of providing medical care; (I was taken to a pediatric from birth to age 8; between 8 and 31 I was allowed to go to the emergency room 8 times; during those years I suffered 7 miscarriage, multiple injuries, and many serious infections, none of which I was allowed to go to the hospital for. Because of the state of the room I was kept looked in [see photos here] I new suffer from "stacibotrin poisoning" and have crippling life-long respiratory and sinus problems)
I was also classified as having suffered the following:
- Emotional neglect: characterized by a lack of nurturance, encouragement and support; (Asking for a hug was punishable by being beaten with one of the boards full of nails; not being able to recite the books of the Bible and Book of Mormon fast enough could result in not food for a week; forgetting to say my hourly prayers, could result in being sold to one of the Saco ward LDS church high priests as his sex slave for the day.)
I was also classified as having suffered the following:
- Educational neglect: characterized by the caregivers lack to provide an education and additional resources to actively participate in the school system; (My mother removed me from school at the age of 8 on grounds of "The government controls the school, Satan controls the government, no child off mine will be taken by Satan.")
I was also classified as having suffered the following:
- Abandonment: when the parent or guardian leaves a child alone for a long period of time without a babysitter. (I was frequently -3 to 5 days a week -left looked in the car during hot summer evenings for upto 12 hours to a time, while my mother did karaoke in bars with her sister Barbie Jean)
TRUE Autism is caused by being born with a genetic mutation which triggers compulsive overcompensation techniques as a way to deal with extreme, abnormal, and excessive early age child abuse. The most common trigger is toddler rape by adults, sexual abuse, and child sex slavery.
Child sexual abuse (CSA) is a form of child abuse in which an adult or older adolescent abuses a child for sexual stimulation.
Sexual abuse refers to the participation of a child in a sexual act aimed toward the physical gratification or the financial profit of the person committing the act.
Forms of CSA include asking or pressuring a child to engage in sexual activities (regardless of the outcome), indecent exposure of the genitals to a child, displaying pornography to a child, actual sexual contact with a child, physical contact with the child's genitals, viewing of the child's genitalia without physical contact, or using a child to produce child pornography. Selling the sexual services of children may be viewed and treated as child abuse rather than simple incarceration.
Persons with ACTUAL Autism often display several of the following side effects of child sexual abuse:
- guilt and self-blame
- flashbacks
- nightmares
- insomnia
- fear of things associated with the abuse (including objects, smells, places, doctor's visits, etc.)
- self-esteem difficulties
- sexual dysfunction
- chronic pain
- addiction
- self-injury
- suicidal ideation
- somatic complaints
- depression
- post-traumatic stress disorder
- anxiety
- other mental illnesses including borderline personality disorder and dissociative identity disorder
- propensity to re-victimization in adulthood
- bulimia nervosa
Children who are the victims are also at an increased risk of sexually transmitted infections due to their immature immune systems and a high potential for mucosal tears during forced sexual contact.
In the United States, approximately 15% to 25% of women and 5% to 15% of men were sexually abused when they were children.
- Most sexual abuse offenders are acquainted with their victims;
- approximately 30% are relatives of the child, most often brothers, sisters, fathers, mothers, uncles or cousins;
- around 60% are other acquaintances such as friends of the family, babysitters, or neighbours;
- strangers are the offenders in approximately 10% of child sexual abuse cases.
- In over one-third of cases, the perpetrator is also a minor.
The uncles who raised me are currently wanted by and on the run from the FBI.
An increase in children having Autism = an increase in children being raped, molested, and sexually abused by a caregiver before reaching the age of 3.
Yes, because of what the ACTUAL causes of ACTUAL Autism are, if your child REALLY DOES have ACTUAL Autism...
you are one hell of a horrible, shitty, no good son of bitch, bastard of a parent and you should be in prison where your neglectful, self-serving, sexually depraved, child abusing ass belongs.
You might want to think about THAT next time you go around bragging "I self diagnosed my child as Autistic."
As many as 60% of all Autistics are catatonic... meaning they were abused so bad that their brain shut down, forcing them into a "waking coma" as a way to not see the abuse any longer.
Asperger’s Syndrome shares with Autism:
- a severe and sustained impairment in social interaction
- restricted and repetitive patterns of behaviour and interests.
But people with Asperger’s do not have:
- the significant delays in language, cognition, self-help skills or adaptive behaviour that are typical in autism
Aspies are:
- often physically clumsy and awkward, more obviously than children with classic Autism
Asperger’s is often not recognized easily or early, and may be misdiagnosed as:
- Tourette’s Syndrome
- Attention Deficit Disorder
- Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder
- Oppositional Defiance Disorder
- Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder
As with Autism, the disorder is lifelong and symptoms do not lesson, change, or go away with time.
Asperger's is considered prevalent and very common.
Was identified in 1944, but was not recognized by doctors as an actual diagnosis until 1994.
Gifted Introverts are shy people with high IQs (an IQ of 130 or higher).
While socially awkward, they do not have the speech issues, ritualistic behaviors, or other symptoms of either Autism or Aspergers.
Many gifted, but introverted children are inaccurately diagnosed as having Aspergers when they in fact do not have it.
Gifted Children have a very high IQ of 130 or higher.
On the other hand, ACTUAL Aspies rarely have high IQs.
Most Aspergers people have a low IQ that is only slightly higher then the IQs of Autistics, usually in the range of 75 to 90.
High Functioning Aspergers are uncommon to rare, and most of them having normal/average IQs of between 90 to 120.
Autism equaling a high IQ is an urban myth spread by internet memes and is NOT an actual symptom of either Autism or Aspergers.
Aspies are more likely then not to have a low IQ in the range of 75 to 90.
Autistics rarely have an IQ above 75.
True Autism, ACTUAL Autism, is defined as "a psychosis caused by extreme psychological trauma in early childhood, often of a sexual nature".
Psychological trauma is a type of damage to the mind that occurs as a result of a severely distressing event. Trauma is often the result of an overwhelming amount of stress that exceeds one's ability to cope, or integrate the emotions involved with that experience. A traumatic event involves one's experience, or repeating events of being overwhelmed that can be precipitated in weeks, years, or even decades as the person struggles to cope with the immediate circumstances, eventually leading to serious, long-term negative consequences.
Trauma can be caused by a wide variety of events, but there are a few common aspects. There is frequently a violation of the person's familiar ideas about the world and their human rights, putting the person in a state of extreme confusion and insecurity. This is also seen when institutions that are depended upon for survival, violate, humiliate, betray, or cause major losses or separations.
Psychologically traumatic experiences often involve physical trauma that threatens one's survival and sense of security. Typical causes and dangers of psychological trauma include harassment, embarrassment, abandonment, abusive relationships, rejection, co-dependence, physical assault, sexual abuse, partner battery, employment discrimination, police brutality, judicial corruption and misconduct, bullying, paternalism, domestic violence, indoctrination, being the victim of an alcoholic parent, the threat or the witnessing of violence (particularly in childhood), life-threatening medical conditions, and medication-induced trauma.
Catastrophic natural disasters such as earthquakes and volcanic eruptions, large scale transportation accidents, house or domestic fire, motor vehicle accident, mass interpersonal violence like war, terrorist attacks or other mass tortures like sex trafficking, being taken as a hostage or kidnapped can also cause psychological trauma. Long-term exposure to situations such as extreme poverty or milder forms of abuse, such as verbal abuse, exist independently of physical trauma but still generate psychological trauma.
If your child has REAL, ACTUAL Autism, it means he suffered one of the above listed events prior to the age of 3 years old.
Many psychiatrists ACTUALLY TRAINED in diagnosing REAL Autism, even today in 2017 believe that an Autistic person, is a person who was born with Aspergers, but whom suffered such horrendous abuse prior to the age of 3, that, their brain triggered over compensation methods to cope with the extreme abuse they were subjected to.
Because of this, Aspergers and Autism are considered by many to be two different forms of the same disorder, but that Aspergers does not become Autism unless it also has the severe early childhood sexual abuse to trigger it.
Because of the severe nature of the levels of sexual abuse required to trigger the Autism component of Asperger's, when a child is ACTUALLY diagnosed with REAL Autism, they are also immediately put into state custody and removed from their parents/guardian's care, and criminal charges are then filed against the parent/guardian.
If your child was not taken away from you at the time of diagnosis, and you did not have sexual abuse charged filed against you by the state, then your child was NOT diagnosed with ACTUAL Autism.
Kanner's Syndrome (ACTUAL Autism) is listed as a Psychosis and is therefore a mental illness.
It is considered to be caused by a genetic birth defect, which triggers an imbalance of the synapses, when a person suffering from this birth defect, is subjected to sexual abuse.
Doctors and Pediatrics can not legally diagnose Autism because they can not legally diagnose mental illnesses.
Your child can only receive an ACTUAL Autism diagnoses by a Psychiatrist specially trained in severe cases of early childhood sexual trauma.
In spite of untrained teachers, caregivers, social workers, and parents tossing around the "diagnosis" of Autism... to the rate of calling 1 in every 3 children Autistic...
...Autism remains one of the most difficult diagnoses to get diagnosed with, due to the fact doctors are reluctant to risk being sued for false charges of sexual abuse of the child, should it later be discovered the child had not been sexually abused and therefore does NOT have Autism.
Only 1 in 10,000 children are ever ACTUALLY diagnosed with Autism, by someone ACTUALLY TRAINED in recognizing this level of early childhood sexual abuse trauma.
Because Kanner's Syndrome aka ACTUAL Autism is so rare, fewer then 20% of all doctors are trained in how to recognize, diagnose, or treat it.
If your doctor diagnoses your child with "Autism" - get a new doctor immediately, as they are not trained in Autism well enough to know there is no actual medical diagnoses of "Autism" because there is no disease, illness, or disorder that actually has the medical name "Autism".
Both Aspergers and Autism are considered to be "types" of Schizophrenia.
Contrary to popular urban myths spread by ill informed parents and patients, both Autism and Aspergers are mental illnesses and can only be treated by psychiatrists. Family Practitioners and Pediatricians are not legally licensed to treat or diagnose either Aspergers or Autism. Beware of any one who says otherwise.
Unlike most mental illnesses, Aspergers and Autism are disorders you are born with. You can not "get" them. Once activated, they do not lesson, get better, or go away with time.
Similar to Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, both Aspergers and Autism require traumatic stress to "activate" the genes the child was born with. Once activated, they do not turn back off.
Both Aspergers and Autism are also known as "Childhood Onset Schizophrenia".
The difference in the diagnoses, and the severity of the symptoms, is typically a result of the age of onset.
Autism is when the genes are triggered in early childhood before the age of 3. Because of the early onset, Autism is the most physically crippling and disabling type of Schizophrenia. There are no known treatments.
Aspergers is when the genes are triggered in late childhood often around the age of 14. Because of the later onset, many Aspies are able to live independent and functional lives. Diet and lifestyle are considered to help, though this is only speculation.
Schizophrenia is when the genes are triggered in adulthood after the age of 20. Late onset Schizophrenia is often treated with medication, though there is much debate in the medical world as the usefulness of this approach.
Still think you know what Autism is?
I am 1 of the 1 in 10,000 people who has REAL, ACTUAL Autism.
I do not have more then 90% of the symptoms "commonly attributed to Autisim", because most of those symptoms are urban myths made up by fans of Sheldon Cooper and are not real symptoms of REAL Autism.
Find out what it is like to live with REAL Autism here.
Find out why 80% of people claiming to be Autistic are not here:
Autism, Asperger's, And The Danger of The Self-Diagnosis
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If You Are Going To Write An Autistic Character...
Then Write An Autistic Character,
NOT Someone With Self-Diagnosed Aspergers
Self-Diagnosed Aspergers Is NOT Autism
It is Aspergers either.
It is a FICTIONAL disease, created by fans of Sheldon Cooper.
Know The Difference.
Keep in mind that MOST of what you find posted on the internet as "Symptoms of Asperger's" is written by self-diagnosed Aspies, and is VASTLY different from what the ACTUAL, clinical symptoms are.
Remember:
Autism is very rare, only 1 in 10,000 children ACTUALLY have it.
Getting a diagnosis of Autism is next to impossible.
Parents who push their doctors to look for Autism in their child, are rarely aware that they are asking their doctor to look for sex abuse done by a parent.
Aspergers is fairly uncommon, only 1 in 400 children ACTUALLY have it.
Yet 1 in ever 3 children is self diagnosed (by themselves or a parent) as being an "Aspie".
Autism Spectrum Disorder in far more common with 1 in 64 children having it. (This means, 1 in every 64 children, have one of the illnesses o the list below)
There are more then 60 illnesses, which are commonly miss-self-diagnosed as Aspergers:
Can You List all Of The Autism Spectrum Disorders?
Most People Can Only List 5 of Them
There Are More Then 60 Disorders "On The Autism Spectrum" Including Alzheimer's, Parkinson's, Schizophrenia, Threadworm Infestation, and having had a Stroke.
Did you know that?
Autism Is A Rare Illness
Only 1 in 10,000 ACTUALY Have Autism
Yet 1 in 3 People Self Diagnose Themselves As "Aspergers Type of Autism"
Only Problem Is Aspergers Is Not A Type Of Autism
Aspergers Is One Of More Then 60 Illnesses Known As "The Autism Spectrum Disorders"
An ASD Is An Illness That Is NOT Autism, But Displays Autistic-Like Symptoms
80% of All People Claiming To Be "Autistic Aspies" Actually Have One of The Illnesses on This List Instead:
Here Are The Autism Spectrum Disorders
(Illnesses commonly misdiagnosed as Autism & which 80% of self diagnosed Aspies ACTUALLY have)
- Abnormal Fear Structure
- Alzheimer Disease
- Angelman Syndrome
- Anxiety disorders
- Aphasia
- Asperger syndrome
- Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder, or AD/HD
- Auditory Processing Disorder
- Avoidant Personality Disorder
- Bipolar disorder
- Bi-Polar Affective Disorder
- Candida Albicans.
- Carnitine Deficiency
- Celiac's Disease
- Childhood Disintegrative Disorder
- Chromosome 15 inverted duplication
- Chromosome 17 trisomy mosaicism
- Chromosome 18, Monosomy 18p
- Chromosome 18p minus syndrome
- Chromosome 19 ring syndrome
- Chromosome 1q21.1 Deletion Syndrome
- Chromosome 2, monosomy 2q37
- Chromosome 20, deletion 20p
- Chromosome 20p deletion syndrome
- Cocaine use during pregnancy
- Cocktail Party Speech Syndrome
- Concentration Disorder
- Congenital Rubella Syndrome
- Cornelia de Lange Syndrome
- DAS "Developmental Apraxia of Speech"
- Deafness
- Defiant Disorder
- Del(1) (pter-p35)
- Deletion 20p
- Developmental Verbal Dyspraxia (apraxia)
- Down’s Syndrome
- Epilepsy
- Fetal Alcohol Effect
- Fragile X Syndrome
- Galactosemia
- Heckenlively syndrome
- Heller's Disease
- Hyperlexia
- Hypomelanosis of Ito
- Intellectual Disability
- Intermittent Explosive Disorder
- Irlen Syndrome/Scotopic Sensitivity Syndrome (SSS)
- Klinefelter Syndromes
- Lactic Acidosis
- Landau-Kleffner Syndrome
- Lead poisoning
- Lesch-Nyhan Syndrome
- Manic Depression
- Mental retardation
- Mesenteric adenitis
- Microdeletion 3q29
- Migraine
- Mild traumatic brain injury (MTBI)
- Monosomy 20p
- Mucopolysaccharidoses (MPS)
- Narcissistic Personality Disorder
- Neurofibromatosis
- Nonverbal learning disorder
- Normal Pressure Hydrocephalus (NPH)
- Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)
- Obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD)
- PDD-NOS "Pervasive Development Disorder/Not Otherwise Specified"
- Phenylketonuria
- Porphyria
- Post-concussive brain injury
- Prosopagnosia
- PTEN Hamartoma Tumor Syndrome
- Reactive Attachment Disorder
- Receptive Developmental Dysphasia
- Rett Syndrome
- Schizo Effective Personality Disorder
- Schizoid Personality Disorder
- Schizotypal Personality Disorder
- Schizophrenia
- Selective mutism
- Semantic Pragmatic Disorder or SPD
- Sensory processing disorder
- Sleep Disorder
- Smith-Magenis Syndrome
- Social anxiety disorder
- Spacial Planning Disorder
- Static Encephalopathy
- Stereotypic movement disorder
- Stroke -- Undiagnosed
- Tardive Dyskinesia
- Threadworm infestation
- Tourette’s Syndrome
- Tuberous Sclerosis
- Turner's syndrome
- Unspecified Neurodevelopmental Disorder
- WAGR Syndrome
- William’s Syndrome
- Wilms tumor
- Wilsons Disease
Some of the illnesses on that list are extremely life threatening if left untreated.
Most parents who self-diagnose their child, do so with out ever looking at ANY alternative. Many of these mothers are later diagnosed with Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy.
More then 60% of mothers who self diagnose their children have Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy and the child turns out to have NO disorder AT ALL and is just a normal healthy child who is victim to a Hypochondriac mother, who gains attention from other mothers by pretending her child has the same illness as the mother she is trying to compete with.
The saddest part is that self-diagnosed Aspergers rose 6,000% the same month the TV show Big Bang Theory became "the most popular show on television", with 40% of children between the ages of 12 and 18, admitting they only claimed to have Aspergers "to be more like Sheldon Cooper" and 60% of all parents who self diagnosed their children stating they hoped that by "convincing" their child they had Aspergers, they would "aspire to be more like Sheldon Cooper"... The horrible reality is Autism always has been and still is very rare, with only 1 in 10,000 children actually having it (also the correct medical name for Autism is Kanner's Syndromn and if you child has REAL Autism, the doctor NEVER says "your child has Autism" but rather says "your child has Kanner's Syndrom").
In spite of the fact that Autism (Kanners Syndrome) is a very rare BIRTH DEFECT caused by mutated genes, and effects only 1 in every 10,000 people, as many as 1 in 3 people currently claim to have Autism.
These facts make me feel sad for all the REAL Autistics and their parents, because the fact remains there are a lot of fakers out there and they don't realize how hard they make it for those of us with real Kanner's Syndrome, a very rare, and very crippling birth defect that is in no way, shape or form, related to Aspergers or Autism Spectrum Disorder.
To know Autism better, it is best to look at real life people who actually have it.
The World's Most Famous Autistic Person: Liberace:
Liberace was noted for:
- having a very low IQ
- as a child was not considered smart enough to attend school
- speech impediments
- difficulty talking
- the ability to play by ear any song on the piano he heard from the age of 3
- was born disabled but almost no one knew this as he hid his disabilities
- had bone and joint issues, causing him to frequently fall, resulting in him often falling on stage, then turning it into a comedy skit... most people thought it was an act, few people were aware of his disability
- multiple serious physical ailments which had him frequently hospitalized every few weeks of his entire life from childhood throughout his adult years
- his extremely cheerful docile demeanor,
- his alarming inability to be made angry (even when his mother was kidnapped and held hostage by a gang of gay-haters)
- being the first man to wear pink on TV
- having 300 rhinestone suites
- having 200 capes
- having 36 dogs, 2 elephants, and dozens of other pets, all rescues
- buying dozens of abandoned buildings and rebuilding them into massive apartment housing complexes for the homeless, giving tens of thousands of homeless people places to live and jobs to provide for their families, without any background checks or judgement
- giving 100s scholarships out each year to disadvantaged, homeless, minority, and coloured children
- being America's first billionaire (his income was $32,000 a day in 1952)
- being the wealthiest man in the world from 1968 to 1987
- in spite of being a billionaire, his estate had very little money at the time of his death, because in the months before he died it went into hyper donate to every one every where mode, but never telling anyone he did it and it was not discovered until his relatives fought his estate for billions after his death, only to find the money was gone
- starting more charity groups then any other celebrity to date
- being the first feather dancer in LasVegas (yes, he invented feather dancing; and yes the first LasVegas show girl was actually a man - this man)
- inventing synchronized water display systems
- inventing the art car (he built 64 of them)
- being the first openly gay celebrity
- being the first openly bi-sexual/polyamorous celebrity (he had 5 girlfriends and 1 male lover whom he was rarely seen without)
- he never married because laws prevented him from marrying all 6 of his lovers
- was the first person in America to die from AIDS, his death inspired most of the AIDS cure research groups that now exist today
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Liberace's kind loving, gentle, childlike nature, his very low IQ, his savant skills in music and cooking, his addictions to all things pink and glitter, his speech disorders (see the videos to hear it in the interviews), his love of animals, his obsessive hoarding problem (watch him trying to squeeze through massive mega hoarding piles of his collections in his house in the family and friends interview below) and his desire to help everyone he meet, are all ACTUAL SYMPTOMS of both Autism and Aspergers.
People who look at Liberace, his glitter, his bright colours, his eye poping pinks, his giddy childlike manner, and often say stuff like...
"But 1 in 3 children have Autism and you don't see 1 in 3 people acting like Liberace. Almost no one dresses or acts like him..."
Ah!
That's what THIS page is for. Go read Part 2: On Writing Autistic Characters Accurately: Autism, Asperger's, And The Danger of The Self-Diagnosis, which explains why it is, 1 in 3 children "have Autism" while only 1 in 10,000 people dress and act like Liberace.
The short answer is this:
- ACTUAL Autism (Kanner's Syndrome) is very RARE, effecting only 1 in every 10,000 children
- Self diagnosed Asperger's is very COMMON with 1 in 3 children self-diagnosed
- ACTUAL Asperger's is rarer then people think however as only 1 in 400 children who actually have a doctor's diagnose
- 1 in 64 children are diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder, which is different then all of the ones listed above
The fact of the matter is, Autism always has been and still is a very rare disorder and Asperger's is markedly different from Autism, and self-diagnosed Aspergers is different then either Autism or Aspergers.
When you meet someone with Autism... REAL Autism... you are gonna know it. You are not going to say to yourself:
"Hmmm maybe they might possibly have Autism"...
No, you a gonna say:
"OMG! What the freaking hell is wrong with that person, did you see how they were dressed? Did you hear how they talked? They are dancing around chasing butterflies like a 2 year old! What the freaking hell? They are so bizarre!"
If you can get a person with Autism to talk, you are gonna notice, they have a very distinctive voice. They all have it. Every single one of us. Don't know what is sounds like? Here... watch this video... an interview with Liberace... pay attention to his voice and how he talks in a "child like pitch" and uses "childlike" phrases and expressions while talking... (he is in his 60s in this interview)
That is what is known as "the autistic voice" also known by bigots as "the gay voice".
If you ever looked at my YouTube videos, you'll see the most common comment across the board is for people to ask: "What's wrong with her voice?"
I have Autism, and so, like every one else who has Autism, I have that very distinctive "autistic voice".
Aspies do not have it. It one of the ways Aspergers is different then Autism. Aspergers have what is known as the "monotone voice" also known as "the robotic voice" or "the emotionless voice".
It's one of the easiest ways to tell if a person has Autism or Aspergers or neither. Just get them to talk and listen to their voice.
Also Autistics tend to prance instead of walk and gallop instead of run. Watch an autistic walk - they don't stroll along like most people do, but rather have a hop, skip, jump, tippy toe a few steps, then hop, skip, jump again, then twirl around on their toe like a ballerina, hop, skip, jump again, take a few steps, and repeat.
When told to walk slow, Autistics often hold their arms straight out, and do very tiny "ballerina toe steps" nearly walking in place. Which adults often describe as "twinkle toes".
Autistics walk as though their was music playing and they were prancing across a stage. This is how they walk, every day.
Autistic children, also like to climb, and can frequently be seen jumping up onto chairs or tables, and then spinning around in circles, often with a cape of some sort tied around their neck.
Aspergers on the other hand walk very slow and carefully, often toe to heel, one foot before the other in an awkward straight line, as if walking on a tight rope. It's very controlled, very robotic, and very stiff.
When Aspies run, they also have an interesting way of doing so, where they hold their arms down to their sides, very stiff, very straight, not moving at all, while they high goose step a march, pushing their knees so high, you wonder how they are not knocking their teeth out.
Like the Autistic voice and the Aspie voice, the Autistic walk and the Aspie walk are each very distinctive, and are again, hallmarks of each disorder, making it VERY easy to identify someone with REAL Autism or REAL Aspergers.
80% of self-diadnosed Aspies do not display either the Autistic voice or the Aspie voice, nor the Autistic walk or the Aspie walk, which can be used as proof in itself, that they have miss-self-diagnosed.
But, no, you are right... in spite of 1 in 3 children being self diagnosed as "Aspies" and claiming they therefore are "autistic"... you only see 1 in 10,000 who "talk childish", prance instead of walk, wear capes, pink, and glitter as every day fashion, and act like they are 2 years old no matter how old they are, because, in spite of the boom of "self diagnosed" Aspies and Autistics, there are still ONLY 1 in 10,000 children born with REAL Autism.
A person can be diagnosed as having BOTH Autism AND Asperger's.
Autistics may also display the following symptoms:
- are slow to develop speech
- would rather talk to adults than kids their own age
- deficits in social-emotional reciprocity; ranging from abnormal social approach and failure of normal back and forth conversation through reduced sharing of interests, emotions, and affect and response to total lack of initiation of social interaction
- are perceived by others are "strange", "weird", bizarre", or "insane"
- many also have co-occurring conditions of mental illness (such as bipolar disorder), behavioral or mood disorder (such as clinical depression or tourette's syndrome), learning disability (such as dyscalcula), or intellectual disability (formerly called mental retardation.)
- develop strange obsessions with unusual objects
- most have aversions to light touch, such as patting the back, stroking hair, or poking, and may reflexively lash out at someone or something making such contact
- lack the ability to read facial expressions or interpret the emotions of others
- many also have conditions like executive function disorder, sensory processing disorder (formerly called sensory integration disorder), prosopagnosia (face blindness), dyspraxia, synesthesia, anxiety disorders, and learning disabilities
- are easily frightened, suffer high anxiety, and are prone to panic attacks
- are frequently also diagnosed with OCD or OCPD
- are often misdiagnosed or given simultaneous diagnoses with various conditions like attention deficit disorder (add), attention deficit disorder with hyperactivity (adhd), post-traumatic stress disorder (ptsd), or intellectual disability
- frequently wear capes and hats as part of their everyday wear
- problems with gross and fine motor skills
- are seen by others as "loners"
- deficits in nonverbal communicative behaviors used for social interaction; ranging from poorly integrated verbal and nonverbal communication, through abnormalities in eye contact and body language, or deficits in understanding and use of nonverbal communication, to total lack of facial expression or gestures
- practice various stereotypy, stimming, and punding activies
- identify as geeks and nerds
- an easily come across as arrogant, rude, self-centered, or mean, and will rarely be aware of this unless informed directly
- are good with computers
- tend to understand language literally and explicitly
- have a tendacy to play video games more then is considered normal
- many are also germaphobic and wash their hands dozens of times a day
- when a routine is altered or disrupted, may have a meltdown, experience severe anxiety, and will have extreme difficulty adapting to the change
- most also have gastrointestinal problems
- tend to be very truthful or honest, sometimes even to the point of extreme bluntness
- many have glucose and/or lactose intolerance
- deficits in developing and maintaining relationships, appropriate to developmental level (beyond those with caregivers); ranging from difficulties adjusting behavior to suit different social contexts through difficulties in sharing imaginative play and in making friends to an apparent absence of interest in people
- have a love for all things sci-fi, especially Star Trek and Star Wars and FireFly
- idioms are difficult to understand
- most will live their entire lives as virgins, never once engaging in sex
- rely heavily on routine, sameness, or being able to expect something to be or occur a certain way
- most find the idea of engaging in sex activities repulsive, but obsessively read/watch hentai (which they see as comedy, rather then erotic)
- obsess over comic books and super heroes
- resistance to a change in routine
- watch a lot of anime
- read a lot of manga
- hyposensitivity to pain and touch
- both have a high rate of never becoming valuable citizens within society: Autistics because they are too busy happily painting rainbows on pebbled and Aspies because they are too busy plotting global domination
- stereotyped or repetitive speech, motor movements, or use of objects; (such as simple motor stereotypies, echolalia, repetitive use of objects, or idiosyncratic phrases)
- most will never marry
- have great difficulties with nonverbal communication such as facial expressions and body language, and have trouble understanding social subtleties and subtext
- cite attending comic book and gaming conventions while CosPlaying their favorite characters, among their favorite past times
- play RPGs like Dungeons and Dragons
- play collectible card games like Magic the Gathering
- enjoy board games
- amass huge collections, tens of thousands of items - all identical
- excessive adherence to routines, ritualized patterns of verbal or nonverbal behavior, or excessive resistance to change; (such as motoric ritual, insistence on same route or food, repetitive questioning or extreme distress at small changes)
- read every book they can find
- are prone to enjoy reading (and memorizing) unusual books, such as phone books, dictionaries, or all 100 volumes of a 100 volume encyclopedia set
- highly restricted, fixated interests that are abnormal in intensity or focus; (such as strong attachment to or preoccupation with unusual objects, excessively circumscribed or perseverative interests)
- have photographic and/or idenic memories
- are highly stressed by loud noises, bright lights, and quick movements
- do not do well in large crowds
- hyper or hypo reactivity to sensory input or unusual interest in sensory aspects of environment; (such as apparent indifference to pain/heat/cold, adverse response to specific sounds or textures, excessive smelling or touching of objects, fascination with lights or spinning objects)
- are prone to developing odd phobias (such as fear of death by paper cut infections)
- are prone to developing agoraphobia
- poor eye contact
- too much sensory overstimulation can lead to sensory overload -- a debilitating state in which the affected person is unable to process or respond to any sensory stimuli, including social interaction
- live by a rigid set of ritualistic activities (such as eating the exact same food at the exact same time of certain days: Mac&cheese on Thursday at 4 and never at 4:05 and never on Friday)
- are comforted by tactile activities (playing with kinetic sand, squeezing squishie balls, hugging teddy bears) and will do so for hours to a time
- most have a very strong sense of justice -- of right and wrong, and of fairness
- are more likely to commit suicide before reaching the age of 45, then any other neuro disorder
Autism is a life-long, chronic disorder
Yes - Adults Have Autism
A common thing I hear from readers is the phrase:
"But how can he have Autism, only kids get that!"
"But that's a childhood illness, he's a grown man, he can't be Autistic."
"Wait, how can an adult have Autism?"
It seems to baffle many readers of the series to see Quaraun, an adult with Autism.
While the series spans his entire life (750 years), the bulk of the series takes place in a small 50 year period, when he is around 450 years old, which is the equivalent of a 40 to 50 year old human man.
For some reason the average person is unaware of the fact that Autism does not go away once the child becomes an adult.
The problem seems to be based in:
"But I never see adults with Autism!"
No. You don't. That's because 73% of all Autistic children, grow up to be adults who living in nursing homes, group care homes...
Did you know that a Nursing Home is NOT the same thing as a Home For the Elderly, a Seniors' Home, or a Retirement Assisted Living Complex?
Contrary to what you are told in movies, a Nursing Home is a place for adults who can not function without 24 hour adult supervision and have no relative willing to care for them. Autism and Downs Syndrome are the two most common types of patients in a Nursing Home. Most of them being between the ages of 18 to 45. (Few Autistics live past 45 years of age.)
Do you know why most Autistics do not live past 45? Because most die from starvation, malnutrition, untreated injuries, untreated broken bones that became infected, suicide, or being beaten to death by bullies.
Autistic adults are rarely able to cook for themselves, and without caregivers can go weeks on end without food.
Autistic adults are rarely aware they are sick, hurt, or injured, and if they do not have a caregiver to take them to the hospital, they do not think to go on their own. This is not an avoidance of doctors, but rather them absent minding forgetting that things like doctors exist.
Autistic adults have a high rate of "suicide by poison" which is presumed to be not actual suicide, but rather, mishaps such as them not being able to tell the difference between a white bottle of milk and a white bottle of Draino.
Autistic adults have a high rate of "suicide by overdose" which is presumed to be not actual suicide, but rather, mishaps such as them not being able to tell the difference between take 2 before bed and take 20 before bed, due to their not being able to count or comprehend differences in the amount of things.
And again Autistic adults have a high rate of "suicide by overdose" which is presumed to be not actual suicide, but rather, mishaps such as them not being able to tell time and instead of "take 1 pill every 8 hours" taking 8 pills every half hour.
Autistic adults have the highest rate of any illness of dying from injuries sustained by bullies. This is a combination of Autistic adults being 63% more likely to be bullied with excessive physical violence and 83% more likely to not seek medical help (see above).
73% of Autistic adults will never set foot out of a nursing home or be seen by the general public.
(And why do all these percentages end in 3?)
Pay close attention to Autistic children... have you ever noticed that between the ages of 18 to 24, they simply disappear? Vanish from the world as though they never existed? This is because 73% of all parents of Autism, mistakenly thought their child would hit 18 and BOOM the "childhood illness" would disappear.
Then 18 came and went and reality hit them... their child was going to continue to wear diapers for the next 50 year. Their child would never talk, never learn to eat on their own... after 18 years of waiting for that magical day when adulthood would set in and they could FINALLY have a break from raising an Autistic child - reality set in and they were faced with: OMG! Autism is NOT a childhood illness! It doesn't magically go away at adulthood!
And so, it was off to the nursing home with them. The parents finally got their freedom. The Autistic adult is left traumatized, feeling abandoned by his family, unloved, unwanted, and in more then half of all cases, will commit suicide with in the first 2 years of being sent to a nursing home, once the realization their family is never coming back for them sets in.
That is why you rarely see Autistic adults in public, and that is why Autism has the highest suicide rate of any mental illness. A symptom of Autism is an inability to accept change; becoming closely attached to their caretakers; and suicide if ever separated from said caregivers.
How to tell if an adult has Autism:
- Only 33% of Autistic adults are able to achieve at least partial independence; full Independence is rare.
- Impaired ability to initiate or sustain a conversation with others. Autistic adults find it very difficult to communicate.
- 40% of adults with autism never speak/are 100% mute
- 70% of adults with autism rarely speak/are near mute
- About 10% of adults with autism have some form of savant skills-limited gifts such as memorizing lists, drawing, or musical ability.
- 50% of Autistic adults wander away from caregivers (not realizing they have done so, often following a floating dust speck or a beam of light, etc).
- 50% of Autistic adults can get "lost", even s only a few feet from their driveway.
- 50% of Autistic adults have no facial recognition and will not recognize a person they see today as being the same person they meet yesterday.
- 50% of Autistic adults have no familiar recognition and can not tell the difference between one car or another, one house or another, and often if get to the end of their driveway, can not tell which house is theirs to go back into it.
- Sleep problems occur in about 40% to 70% of adults with autism.
- Some adults with Autism never develop functional communication, while others may have speech, but not use it functionally.
- Stereotyped, repetitive, or unusual use of language. Autistic adults find it very difficult to verbalize what they want to say. Adults with autism often repeat over and over a phrase they have heard previously (echolalia)
- Adults with Autism use the word "okay" to answer nearly everything anyone says to them, rather than answer with "yes", "no", or full sentences.
- It is difficult for Autistic adults to start and continue a conversation.
- Autistic adults avoid eye contact completly.
- Autistic adults do not comment on sociological-political issues, rarely vote, and are rarely aware of what is going on in the world at large.
- Difficulty understanding what other people mean to say.
- An Autistic adult person will not understand that someone is using humor. They instead interpret the communication word by word and fail to catch the implied meaning.
- Jokes, slang terms, sarcasm, and irony are beyond the Autistic Adult's realm of understanding.
- Autistic adults take words literally. If you say a word they do not know, they will look up i's meaning in the dictionary and assume that it was you meant, while remaining clueless to any slang, hidden, double, or innuendo meanings you may have intended.
- Most people find interacting with Autistic adults frustrating and avoid communication with them.
- Autistic adults cannot keep track of time, have no grasp of time (minutes, hours, days are all the same to them). They can not read clocks or calendars.
- Restricted patterns of interest that are abnormal in intensity or focus.
- Preoccupation with certain objects or subjects.
- When doing something they enjoy, Autistic adults may continue to do it for hours, or days, on end without stopping to eat or sleep or pee, and may require another person to physically get them out of that state.
- People find it difficult to deal with autistic adults, due to their none standard emotions (laughing at death, crying at a joke, etc). Autistic adults rarely know when to use which emotion and may use random emotions at random, to simply try to appear normal, but using said emotions at the wrong time only males them appear even less normal.
- Autistic adults have trouble participating in a two-way conversation and may appear to talk at people rather than with them
- Like children, adults with Autism may have a tendency to throw tantrums, however, their tantrums cannot be compared with that of a child, as children often do this for attention, while an Autistic is completely unaware there are others with them. An Autistic tantrum, more correctly called a "fit" or "meltdown", bares more similarities to an epileptic seizure then and actual temper tantrum. A true tantrum is a controlled tool to get something desired, whereas an Autistic meltdown is a uncontrolled response to over stimulation of lights, sounds, or crowds.
- Most of the autistic adults are hyper or hypo sensitive to light, sounds and crowds and have sensory processing issues and experience unusual reactions to certain noises, sights, smells or textures.
- Autistic adults suffer from fine or gross motor difficulty.
- Adults with Autism often can not focus their eyes and are not able to participate in activities such as sports which require coordination with other people.
- Adults with Autism engage themselves in repetitive activities.
- Impaired ability to make friends with peers. Autistic adults often find it difficult to make and maintain friends.
- Autistic adults live in their own world, which is fully populated and exists in their head. They prefer activities, which require minimum interaction with other people, so that they can interact with the people living in their head instead.
- Autistic adults have an inflexible adherence to specific routines or rituals. Can only walk on certain roads at certain times, can only eat certain foods at certain places on certain days, etc.
- Some Autistic adults have a significant cognitive impairment, while others are gifted in one area.
- Autistic children who displayed excessive lining up of toys or objects, will continue to do so as adults.
- Autistic adults do not often enjoy or seek out interaction with others, yet some do not get to socialize as much as they would like, but have not develops age appropriate skills to know how to interact with those around them.
It’s important to avoid stereotypes like, “All people with autism do . . . .” Remember, there are just as many individual differences among people with autism as there are among people without autism.
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Resources:
Where to find ACTUAL (Accurate) Information on ACTUAL Mental Illnesses
Every year since 2004, I post in the Mental Illness thread on NaNoWriMo, a list of places where authors can find actual/accurate information on a variety of mental illnesses and physical disabilities to help them write their characters more accurately. Most of these site also have lists of other sites as well.
Here for you now, is that list:
Act Early on Developmental Concerns: Partnering with Early Intervention
Adolescents with autism spectrum disorder at risk for bullying
Advancing Futures for Adults with Autism
Advice for autistic adults about work - NASAlmost half of kids with autism are bullied, study shows
American Association of People with Disabilities
American Association on Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities
American Foundation for the Blind
American Psychological Association
American Psychological Association's Trauma Psychology Division
Americans Disabled for Accessible Public Transit
An Anti-Bullying Intervention for Children with Autism
Anxiety and Depression Association of America
AnxietySocialNet - Agoraphobia support groups and more
Archives of Scientific Psychology®
Are Autistic People More Sensitive To Trauma
Asian American Journal of Psychology
Assistance Dog Advocacy Project
The Association Between Bullying and the PsychologicalAssociation for Applied Psychophysiology and Biofeedback
Association of University Centers on Disabilities
Australian Centre for Posttraumatic Mental Health
Australasian Society for Traumatic Stress Studies
Autism and Asperger Syndrome Educator’s Guides, Organization for Autism Research (OAR)
Autism Genetics Initiative Data Archive
Autism Genetics Resource Exchange
Autism, PDD-NOS & Asperger's fact sheets | BullyingAutism, Ptsd, And Emdr | My PTSD Forum
The Autism Speaks Transition Tool Kit
Autistic Self Advocacy Network
Autism Source, Autism Society of America (ASA)
Autism Spectrum Disorder and bullying
Autism Wandering Awareness Alerts Response Education (AWAARE)
Behavior Analysis: Research and Practice
Biofeedback Foundation of Europe
BC Schizophrenia Society Foundation
Bullying | Autism SpeaksBullying Among Adolescents With Autism Spectrum DisordersBullying & Abuse | Life on the SpectrumBullying and Autism: Helping Kids CopeBullying and Autism - Medical Home Portal
Bullying and Autism Spectrum Disorders: guidance for
Bullying and autism spectrum disorders - Norfolk Schools
Bullying: children & teens with autismBullying, disability and mental health
Bullying Experiences Among Children and Youth with Autism
Bully Stoppers - Victorian Government
Canadian Foundation for Trauma Research & Education
Canadian National Institute for the Blind
Canadian Psychology / Psychologie canadienne
Cannon (1942/1957). "Voodoo" death. (Walter Cannon's seminal article on death through the shock of terror.)
Care For Disabled Veterans: Acknowledging Post-traumatic Stress Disorder from Iraq War Experience
Caring for Children With Autism Spectrum Disorders: A Resource Toolkit for Clinicians
CDC’s Disability and Health Program
CDC’s National Center on Birth Defects and Developmental Disabilities Funding Opportunities
The Center on the Social and Emotional Foundations for Early Learning (CSEFEL)
Center for Evolutionary Psychology
Child Abuse Prevention Network
The Child Survivor of Traumatic Stress [newsletter]
Children and Adults with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder
Children’s Health Insurance Program
Clinical Practice in Pediatric Psychology®
Code of Federal Regulations, Title 45, Part 46
Community Alliance for the Ethical Treatment of Youth
Council of Parent Attorneys and Advocates
Cultural Diversity & Ethnic Minority Psychology®
Data Resource Center for Child and Adolescent Health
The Decline in Child Sexual Abuse Cases.
Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance
Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrics Online
Developmental Screening/Testing Coding
Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders
Disability Rights Education and Defense Fund
Disabled Peoples' International
DisAbled Women's Network Canada
Down Syndrome Advocacy Foundation
Drew Westen's Lab of Personality & Psychopathology
Eastern Association for the Surgery of Trauma
EEG & Clinical Neuroscience Society
The Effects of Psychological Trauma on Children with Autism
Equal Employment Opportunity Commission
ERIC - The Experience of Friendship, Victimization and Bullying in ChildrenEuropean Federation of Associations of Families with Mental Illness
EFORT European Federation of National Associations of Orthopaedics and Traumatology
European Society for Trauma and Dissociation
European Society for Traumatic Stress Studies
Exploring the Nature of Traumatic Memory
Family Association for Mental Health Everywhere
Families for Depression Awareness
Family Council - Empowerment For Families
Focus on Bullying and Autism Spectrum Disorders | StarrFoundations of Positive Psychology
F.R.I.E.N.D.S. Down Syndrome Advocacy Group
From "Bully" to Bullied - Autism Spectrum ExplainedGalloway's Society for the Blind
The Growing Concern of Suicide and High Functioning AutismHealth Resources and Services Administration
Human Behavior and Evolution Society
Information Sheet Bullying and Autism Spectrum Disorders
International Bipolar Foundation
The International Classification of Diseases
International Consortium for Brain Mapping
International Disability and Development Consortium
International Society for Neuronal Regulation
International Society for Traumatic Stress Studies
International Trauma Studies Program
Journal of Abnormal Psychology®
Journal of Applied Psychology®
The Journal of Injury and Violence Research (JIVR)
Journal of Personality and Social Psychology®
Journal of Rural Mental Health®
Leaving the Mentally Ill Out in the Cold (newspaper/blog post)
Learning Disabilities Association of America - Disability Rights and Advocacy
Lew Goldberg's International Personality Item Pool
Life Journey Through Autism Series, Organization for Autism Research (OAR)
Maeve: Psychiatric Service Dog and Mental Health Advocate
Marriage Advocates - Infidelity and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Mencap (The Royal Society for Mentally Handicapped Children and Adults)
Mental Disability Advocacy Center
Mental Health Advocacy Services
Mental Health for Youth in Armed Conflict
Mental Health Services Locator, National Mental Health Information Center
Mental Wellness Today (magazine - has large article database)
Mood Disorders Society of Canada
Mood Disorders Association of Ontario - Helpful Links
Muscular Dystrophy Association
Naropa University: Somatic Counseling Psychology
National Advocate for People with Down Syndrome
National Association of County and City Health Officials
National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC)
National Alliance on Mental Illness
National Association of the Deaf
National Association of Special Education Teachers
National Centre Against Bullying - The Alannah and Madeline Foundation
National Center for Education Statistics
National Center for Health Statistics
National Center of Medical Home Initiatives for Children with Special Needs
National Child Traumatic Stress Network
National Database for Autism Research
National Dissemination Center for Children with Disabilities (NICHCY)
National Network of Adult and Adolescent Children who have a Mentally Ill Parent
The National Professional Development Center on Autism Spectrum Disorders
NCP Clinicians Trauma Update Online
North American Society for Childhood Onset Schizophrenia
Office of the Children's eSafety Commissioner - Australian Government
Office of Special Education and Rehabilitative Services
Open Culture: Free Online Classes
Operation Autism for Military Families
A Parent’s Guide to Evidence-Based Practice and Autism
Parkinson's Disease Foundation
Pet Partners - Denied Access, Now What?
PTSD - AUTCOM - The Autism National CommitteePTSD | Autism SpeaksPost-Traumatic Stress Disorder | The Scott CenterThe Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Alliance
PTSD and Autism - The Thinking Moms' RevolutionPTSD and Autism It has amazed me how... - AutismPrejudice. No way! - NSW Government
Primate Handedness and Brain Lateralization
Psychological Trauma: Theory, Research, Practice, and Policy®
Questioning Answers: PTSD and autismRacism. No way! - NSW Government
Raindrop: Death Education for Children of all Ages
Recovered Memories of Sexual Abuse: Research and Resources
Reflections on The Problem of Psychic Trauma
Retrieving, Assessing, and Classifying Traumatic Memories
Schizophrenia and Related Disorders Alliance of America - SARDAA
Schizophrenia Awareness Association of India
Schizophrenia News and Information
Schizophrenia Society of Canada
Schizophrenia Society of Ontario - Official SiteSchool Accreditation, National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC)
Special Education Technical Assistance and Dissemination Network
Spina Bifida Association of America
Stigmatization of People with Autism Spectrum DisordersStress, Trauma and Sleep in Children
Suicide Awareness Voices of Education
Survey finds 63% of children with autism bullied - CBS NewsTeaching Tips for Children and Adults with Autism
Terrorism Injuries: Information, Dissemination and Exchange (TIIDE)
tips for educatorsTrauma Intervention Programs, Inc.
The Traumatic Stress Centre (Wales)
UK Psychological Trauma Society
University of Washington - Fact Sheets - Facts About Mental Illness and Violence
Using Drawing as Intervention with Traumatized Children
Washington Autism Alliance & Advocacy
Webcast Berkeley: online courses & speakers at UC Berkeley
When Bullies Target Autistic Kids | Support for Special NeedsWhy Autistic Kids Make Easy Targets for School BulliesYoung Children with Challenging Behavior
Autism & Me:
The Squidoo Lens
10th Anniversary
(2007 to 2017)
During NaNoWriMo 2007's novel writing contest, a forum thread was started... a young author wanted to write an Autistic main character and asked on the NaNoWriMo forum if any one could tell her how to write a mental illness that she did not have and also knew no one with... the result was a 700 page non-fiction book, called "Autism and Me: On Being An Adult With Autism, A Look Into My Everyday Life."
Originally published on LuLu as a book for sale, a month later I unpublished it and released it as a free to read online series of articles on Squidoo. I continued to add new articles to the series on a near monthly basis in the 10 years since then.
The series of pages linked below, are those articles, the 2007 originals, the ones written in the years since, and the 2017 10th Anniversary updates on what has changed in the decade since those first articles were released.
Don't Know Where To Start?
Start With These Two First
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Autism & Me - Part 2: A look at REAL Autism and the urban myths spread by those with a self-diagnosis. |
"People deserve a break. The stressed and unorganized person who doesn’t have the same priorities as you. They may be dealing with an autistic child, abusive spouse, fading parents, or cancer. Don’t judge people until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes. Give them a break instead."
— Guy Kawasaki
I'm a woman who has had 7 miscarriages, and wears "elaborate clothes". Because I have no children, the residents of Old Orchard Beach, beat me up, calling me a transsexual, claiming only a man would dress like I do, claiming that the reason I have no children is because I'm not really female.
They left me paralyzed and crippled.
They crushed my hips, my pelvis, and my spine, and took away, what little chance I had to carry a pregnancy to full term.
I'm crippled for the rest of my life. I can barely walk now. It's why I'm now on a cane. Any hope I had of having children is gone now.
That's the reality, of the gay hatred of this town.
I have Autism. I wear pink. I wear glitter. I talk with a "funny gay sounding voice".
Acording to the people in this towm:
I walk like a fag...
talk like a fag...
dress like a fag...
act like a fag...
and therefor must be treated like a fag...
I need to be taught my place...
I deserve to be shot in the head...
I look gay, and therefore I must be,
because no one but gay men, talk in this voice
no one but gay men wear pink
no one but gay men wear glitter
no one but gay men prance instead of walk...
so they beat me up, because I'm "too gay" for Old Orchard Beach
they cut my car in half, because I'm "too gay" for Old Orchard Beach
they put a bomb in my house, because I'm "too gay" for Old Orchard Beach
they filled my motorhome with feces, because I'm "too gay" for Old Orchard Beach
they kidnapped my cats, because I'm "too gay" for Old Orchard Beach
they drove a back hoe over my house, because I'm "too gay" for Old Orchard Beach
they cut my cats heads off and nailed their heads to my door, because I'm "too gay" for Old Orchard Beach
because I have Autism
and that makes me "too gay for the family friend town of Old Orchard Beach"
I used to dance when I walked... but after 5 months paralyzed, 18 months relearning to walk, and now 4 years later, my leg is lame and I am crippled, barely able to stand, dragging a lame leg, I'll never dance again.
Do you know what that's like?
Can you even begin to imagine?
To be an Autistic person, who can no longer dance when I walk?
They hate gay men so much, that they are willing to beat up a childless autistic women, in ill health, accusing her of being a transvestite.
Because these evil people took away my ability to have children, I had cats; but they took my cats, and cut off their heads, and nailed them to my door.
Welcome to Old Orchard Beach. The gay-hating capital of Maine.
This is the reality of how Autistics are seen by the world.
This is the reality of how Autistics are treated by "normal" people.
This is the reality of being transgender in Old Orchard Beach.
This is the reality of what bullies do to someone with mental illnesses, they do not understand.
This is the reality of living with Autism.
Do You Know The Identity
of the People Who Did These Things?
Have Information?
Please Call FBI Agent
Andy Drewer @ (207) 774-9322
Once you’ve seen, you can no longer act like you don’t know.
Open your eyes to the truth. It’s all around you.
Don’t deny what the eyes to your soul have revealed to you.
Now that you know, you cannot feign ignorance.
Now that you’re aware of the problem, you cannot pretend you don’t care.
To be concerned is to be human.
― Vashti Quiroz-Vega
"Ignore and ignorance share the same root."
— Kathryn Erskine
“With ignorance comes fear- from fear comes bigotry. Education is the key to acceptance.”
― Kathleen Patel, The Bullying Epidemic-the guide to arm you for the fight
A Plea To NaNoWriMo Overachievers:
If You're Gonna Write Autistic Characters,
Then Stop Research Asperger's And
Start Researching Autism For A Change!
"Can anyone tell me how to write characters with autism while avoiding stereotypes? Thank you."
Here is my response to a question from the NaNoWriMo forums on avoiding the stereo types when writing about characters with Autism:
"Can anyone tell me how to write characters with autism while avoiding stereotypes? Thank you."
My response, resulted in a 700+ page non-fiction book on living with autism.
The response, went off into a rant, not because of the person asking the question, but instead, because of the 300+ Asperger's patients who responded to the question to tell her how to write ASPEGER'S characters, all while claiming their Asperger's was the SAME THING as Autism.
More then 2,000 forum posts were added to the thread, by these 300+ people, boldly spreading huge amounts of extremely inaccurate misinformation about what Autism is and is not, and helping to spread the urban myth that Aspergers is a type of Autism.
Sadly after taking 3 days to read every post on the thread, I finally reached the end to find that not even ONE of the more then 2,000 posts had given her ANY information about Autism.
My response is too long for one page, all pages are being linked to here:
Think you know what it's like to live with Autism?
You might be surprised how little you really know.
A look at REAL Autism and the myth spread by those with a self-diagnosis.
Got An Autism Related Site Or Blog?
Want To Embed These Quotes, Memes, and Fact Sheets On Your Site?
Here's How:
- Step 1: Go to this Pinterest Board:
- Step 2: Click on the pin quote/meme you want to use.
- Step 3: Click the 3 dots "..."
- Step 4: Click the word "embed"
- Step 5: Select the pin size (I'm using size "medium" on these pages, in case you were wondering.)
- Step 6: Highlight & copy the html code.
- Step 7: Paste code into any html block on your blog or website.
- Step 8: Save & publish your blog or website. And you're done!
On Writing The Quaraun Series
World-Building In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi
Weird-Building In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi
Building A Magic System In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi
- Wizards vs Witches vs Sorcerers: How are they different?
- Magic Systems and How to Build Them
- Necromancy: How will resurrection affect society as a whole?
- Spell-casting Side Effects of Magic
- Necromancy FAQ - A Real Necromancer Compares Fantasy Necromancy With The Reality
- Colour Magic - Gypsy Style
- Beware of White Men In Gypsy Clothing: Fake Psychic Scams
- Child Sacrifice in Fantasy Novels
Plotting & Writing Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi
- Ernest Hemingway Style of Writing Literary Fiction Used In Epic Fantasy Novels
- Do you write a novel start-to-finish?
- Ideas, Ideas, Ideas (Where Do You Get Them?)
- Should I plan for ending or just keep writing?
- NaNoWriMo Overachievers: How did you do it?
- How Long is 50,000 Words?
- Why Write 50,000 Words In 30 Days?
- How long does it take to hit 1667 words?
- Average Typing Speed
Character Creation In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi
Writing Sex In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi
Disabled Characters In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi
Drug Use In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi
Horror In Bizzaro Dark High Fantasy Yaoi
.
.
The Quaraun Series On Amazon:
I am wondering why has Amazon moved the Quaraun books to the category "Transgender Romance" and also "Gay Erotica"? The base story is a deeply depressed, suicidal, drug addict Elf who's lover commit suicide and he's trying not to do the same. It's an old Elf in a tavern, monologuing a lot of flashbacks and back story scenes of his youth. These stories are dark, bloody, angsty, full of drug use, murder, rape, Medieval torture, mental/physical/emotional abuse, and references to depression and suicide - no romance in it, unless you count the occasional (and usually brutally violent) rape scenes that show up in nearly every volume - sorry - no clue what Amazon is thinking or why they moved these to Romance and Erotica, but these books are NOT even close to being Romance or Erotica on any level at all. When I published these books I put them in "Dark Fantasy" and "Yaoi". If they show up in any category other then "Dark Fantasy" and "Yaoi", it's because Amazon put them there without my authorization or approval.
~EelKat
Author Interviews
On CosPlaying The Quaraun Characters:
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Author Interviews
Reacting To Old Orchard Beach's
White Power Gay Hating Over Reaction Ban
Of The Quaraun Series:
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The 4 door white truck continues to sit at the end of my drive way (146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine) near every night around sunset, reeving it's engine and squealing it's tires, with the driver yelling anti-gay threats and obscenities out the window. He continues to do the same thing at my dad's apartment building (Biddeford Maine) a few times a week, usually in mid to late afternoon time. He continues to follow me to shopping to various stores in various towns throughout the states.
Phrases he yells from the truck include:
"Kill or be killed remember Saco Shaws all transsexuals are alike"
"I keep a gun under the seat of my truck, I'm gonna use it to shoot you in the head, you transvestite freak"
if cars are going by he yells to them: "that thing is Ken's son, look at how's it's dressed; it's insane, it has autism, we can't allow that thing and it's gay cars in our family friend town of Old Orchard Beach"
He often babbles deranged ramblings about something he calls "the gay-pocalypse", raving lunacy about how "all the gays are gathering" on his doorstep. He raves some crazy nonsense about how Armageddon is coming and the war to end all wars will be "the gays against the Christians" and Christians have to be ready to "kill the gays"
My car is the Autism Awareness Car and had 2.5million marbles glued to it (I have Autism - savant - Kanner's syndrome) he claims tat my car "is gay" because of what it looks like. My car has been vandalized several dozen times, including to have the tires slashed 7 times in 6 months.
After dark often around 10PM, he stands at the end of the logging road across the street from me and shoots at my motohome (in February 2014 he shot holes in my neighbour's barn while doing this). I have video footage of 3 of his shootings at me here: https://youtu.be/NUebzJ9sz9U and here: https://youtu.be/C4dZbgG-Smw
This has gone on since August 2013 now, in addition to all the vandalism, hate crimes, pet beheadings, etc that has happened, including the bomb that blew up our house in 2006.
As you know, that whole time I had not been able to get a plate number on the truck. He as just here again, and I just realized why I could not get a plate number... there are no plates on the truck, either on the front or on the back. However, as he was driving away today... I noticed, there is a plate, stuck up in the back window of the truck, where it can barely be seen, deliberately obscured from view behind a silver tool box.
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