Who do you ship with Avallac'h more?
Ciri or Lara Dorren?

Who do you ship with Avallac'h more? Ciri or Lara Dorren?

I'm stunned. This question seems to have come from someone who doesn't hate Avallac'h and want to kill any one and every one who likes Avallac'h.

I'm Amazed because because 91% of the 24 million Witcher series fans who took CDPR's survey asking who were the most and least liked characters of the Witcher franchise was, voted Avallac'h the most hated character, and also the character they would most like to drive a pitchfork though.

And likely you are by now aware of 214 Twitch users who were banned by Twitch for posting death threats in my Twitch chat, and the 712 Ciri fans who spent 2 years chating "deserve to be raped" in my Twitch chat, and the 300,000+ Avallac'h hating Ciri fans whom have seen fit to message me on Twitter, FaceBook, Reddit, Tumblr, Nexus, Twitch, and my email address, to send me as much enrange, verhemany Avallac'h hate as the possibly can... and of course let's not forget the 5 who showed up at my house with guns, raped 2 of the women in my apartment building, sent 3 elderly men to the hospital, killed a 10 year old boy, totaled 3 cars (including my Dazzling Razzberry), and did $230,000 in damages to our landlord's apartment building resulting in the town condemning the building and leaving 28 families homeless...all because they said they were following the orders of a Ciri fan on Discord who told them to come to my house and do this.

I've encountered people who hated fictional characters before, but this is crazy. The extreme levels of deranged hatred Ciri fans have for Avallac'h is baffling, bizarre, unreasonable, ad psychotic.

I'm used to getting daily hundreds of new rages, rants, death threats, and crazed hate filled whispers, emails, dms, and messages every day, so seeing "Who do you ship with Avallac'h more? Ciri or Lara Dorren?" in my inbox is just... wow!

Who do you ship with Avallac'h more? Ciri or Lara Dorren?

Wow, someone actually asked me a civilized, not hate filled, not trolling, not accusatory question, and it didn't even include death threats - you mean I actually have viewers who aren't rape supporting jackass pieces of shit? Who'd have thunk. Let's answer a question that was not asked in vehement hatred.

Who do you ship with Avallac'h more? Ciri or Lara Dorren?

Let's find out...

*(Note, this originally appeared on my Twitch profile in August 2018.)*

All images on this page are from:
The Witcher 3:
Wild Hunt
|Game of the Year Edition|
Completionist Run:
The Avallac'h Playthrough
(Watch It Live HERE)

Ciri & Avallac'h Forever!Ciri & Avallac'h Forever! And both blond now, like they were in the novels! Yay!


I had to go look up ship to see what it meant.

I'm an elderly senior citizen... I don't know all the new slang you young people often throw at me.

Short for relationship, I think? I got enough answers to figure out the meaning anyways.

So, Ciri or Lara?

Well, I do like him with Ciri, it's kind of obvious, I prefer him to be with Ciri, given how I play The Avallac'h Playthrough with Ciri as his travel companion, and all the sex girls changed into Ciri.

But...have you ever read the novels?

You do know the evidence is pretty high that Avallac'h is gay, right?

No? Didn't know that?

But, you want a look at Avallac'h's love life.... oh... well, be prepared to learn something about Geralt's love life too, because yeah, they were a thing in the novels... as was Avallac'h and Auberon and Avallac'h and Eredin... and Avallac'h prancing around dressed as a woman... he's a transvestite in the novels, you know that too right?

There is WAY more evidence of Avallac'h being gay, than anything else.

Especially given his absolute refusal to have sex with woman, and in spite of all his obsessing over Lara and Ciri, he openly admits he never had a sexual attraction to either of them.

So, the toss up is between Ciri and Lara Dorren?

Wait... where is the option of Avallac'h shipping Avallac'h? He loves himself more then he loves either of them. I mean, he is Master Mirror after all, the Mirror Mage with tens of thousands of mirrors. And he did devote 700 years to cloning himself to create a female version of himself (Lara Dorren)... that kind of says he loves himself more then her.

And what about Geralt? 

Yeah. Geralt. That was a thing in the novels. Not one you hear me mention often, but...

Did you know that in the novels, Geralt has homoerotic feelings for Avallac'h because Avallac'h threw feces at him?


It IS as weird as it sounds.

We are told Avallac'h is a psion and can see and hear every thought in every mind, and we all know about how sexually attracted Geralt is to projectile diarrhea, taking sex baths in tubs full of feces, and, other weird shit fetish things Geralt is into.

*If shit fetishes creep you out... don't read the novels. Geralt's into that big time and you'll encounter of a lot of feces filled sex scenes.*

If Geralt was real, that'd be the first question I would want answered:

Geralt, why do you find projectile diarrhea erotic and how is having sex in a prostitute's pools of feces on the floor while she's having severe projectile diarrhea what you describe as the best sex you ever had?

And Triss Merigold, what the fuck? YOUR shit fetish makes Geralt's shit fetishes look normal and sane.

What is wrong with Andrzej Sapkowski? How are you THAT OBSESSED with feces, shit, and diarrhea that you use it in every single sex scene?

And I used to think HuniPop's Cake Farting fetish was weird. The shit fetishes of the Witcher novels make HuniPop look sane.

But Avallac'h is The Knowing One, he knows everything, and, how did he greet Geralt again?

Oh yes... by throwing feces at him.

Uhm.... ???

Why is Avallac'h throwing feces at Geralt? 

That scene is never explained. It's just there at random, for no reason.

And can we just step back from this a minute to ask:

Avallac'h, why do you have feces laying around your house, at such easy access that you can just throw it at people?

Why is this a question we even have to to ask?

What the hell?

And how does Geralt respond to a mysterious Elf throwing feces at him? How does Geralt ALWAYS respond to the sight of feces? By having an erection and telling the reader about it.

Geralt... why do you have an erection every time you see feces?

And why are you having one over Avallac'h throwing feces at you?

Can we ignore that Geralt is having an erection because Avallac'h is throwing feces at him?

I think I'd like to ignore that.

And again, why the hell does Avallac'h just have random piles of feces laying around his house?

Avallac'h, your sanity has long been in question, but I think we have more reason then usual, to question it here.

But then again... Avallac'h INVITED Geralt to come over, and he IS a psion, and he WAS aware of Geralt's feces fetish.

Did Avallac'h just decorate his house with feces in preparation for Geralt's visiting him?

His house wasn't covered in feces when Ciri lived with him.

What message was Avallac'h sending here?

Trolls ate Folan, and Avallac'h just stood there and watched and did nothing to stop it... also, wow does this lighting make Avallac'h look pale.

Is Avallac'h gay and chasing after Geralt?

There are so many questions about this scene with Avallac'h and Geralt.

Ugggh.... you greet the guy who has a feces fetish by throwing feces at him. Are we supposed to be reading more into this scene?

At the time Avallac'h was painting a purple bison on the wall, but Geralt suggested that purple bison's weren't erotic enough and asks Avallac'h to paint penises on the wall instead.

Yeah... it was GERALT'S IDEA for Avallac'h to paint penises on the wall.

And Avallac'h, giddy with delight... 



Can we stop here for a minute.

What does an Avallac'h giddy with delight look like?

For some reason I want to know.

The Purple Bison scene introduced me to so many questions I never thought I would ask.

And my first time reading this scene, I didn't think anything could trigger more questions then an Avallac'h giddy with delight.

I was wrong... there was soon to be an Avallac'h shrieking with joy... and gnawed bones rammed up rectums... 



...to introduce even more questions I never knew I wanted to ask.

uhhhhh... there are no words for this scene...

I want to run away screaming!

But I can't pull myself away.

Oh my god!

The horrors this scene puts in your head!

What is this scene?

Did I mention that in the novels, Geralt has a weird homoerotic scene with Avallac'h that is just beyond any explanation possible, and can only leave us asking... why? 


Why did this scene even happen?

And Avallac'h, giddy with delight... that's the term it uses... giddy with delight... the mysterious glowing elf, that is floating on the ceiling, giddy with delight... proceeded to paint giant purple penises on the wall while telling Geralt what a delightful idea it was... and Geralt then goes back to talking about the erection he's having over this elf painting penises on the wall and throwing feces at him.

Ciri hugging Avallac'h, Isillia fuming mad.Ciri hugging Avallac'h, Isillia fuming mad.

Uhm... I'm trying to imagine Avallac'h giddy with delight and Geralt having an erection over it.... I just can't see it.

Where's Ciri?

We need to throw Ciri at Avallac'h. Avallac'h and Geralt is just... wrong.... on so many levels.

Avallac'h... giddy with delight.


All I can see is The Joker... laughing hysterically. He has the same cheekbones as Avallac'h.

That's a terrifying thought.

Avallac'h would look like the Joker if he ever laughed.

Avallac'h should never laugh.

He's scary looking enough.

But damn, what does an Avallac'h giddy with delight look like if not The Joker laughing hysterically waving a gnawed bone at Geralt's rectum while shrieking with joy and throwing feces!

Avallac'h, giddy with delight, shrieking with joy, and waving gnawed bones at Geralt's rectum, while throwing feces at Geralt, and painting giant purple penises on the wall.... should logically send any sane person screaming in terror as far as they can get from Avallac'h.

Me? For some as of yet unexplained reason, Avallac'h, giddy with delight, shrieking with joy, and waving gnawed bones at Geralt's rectum, while throwing feces at Geralt, and painting giant purple penises on the wall.... is the scene that just glued me to this guy like ... who knows why... I don't even know... but yeah, THIS scene is why I like this guy.

I have no explanation for it.

Good god if the Purple Bison scene doesn't give you nightmares, nothing will!

Avallac'h in the novels... is... uhm... he's something else, that's for sure.

I knew Avallac'h from the game before the novels. He is so emotionless in the game and never smiles. And then here he is in the novels, giddy with delight while throwing feces at Geralt and painting penises on the wall.


Avallac'h - vanilla, unmoddedAvallac'h - vanilla, unmodded

Boy is Avallac'h ever different in the novels.

And you'd think it was just Geralt who was getting off on this... but...uhm... how do we explain the rest of this scene?

Run! Geralt Run! There's a psychotic elf with a gnawed bone and he wants to ram it up your rectum to find out if you "shriek with joy".

WOULD one shriek with joy while having a gnawed bone rammed up their rectum?

Are we sure those shrieks are actually joyful?

There are so many questions here and I'm not sure I even want to know the answers.

Uhm... Avallac'h's scary. And masochistic. 

Oh god! Is he masochistic!

Most men don't like having a sword driven through their testicles on a daily basis.

At least we know why he likes Ciri.

And Ciri, what the fuck is wrong with you? Most women don't like driving a sword through a man's testicles on a daily basis!

Wow... I feel like I'm reading a Quaraun novel.

I think everyone is well advised, that if they ever see Avallac'h carrying a gnawed bone, shrieking with joy and giddy with delight, to just run. He's insane.

And if Ciri running after him with a sword... damn it jump off the nearest cliff if you have to. Just get all the distance you can between yourself and them, they are both insane!

After reading reading The Purple Bison scene, you will never see Geralt or Avallac'h in the same way again. And you may need lots of brain bleach to ever get the image of Avallac'h wanting to ram a gnawed bone up Geralt's rectum, while Geralt has an erection over the idea, out of your head.

And are we even sure Avallac'h's not gay?

You'd think he wasn't the way he obsesses over Lara and ciri, but.... uhm... he has a 7 page rant on how much he hates sex, how boring females are, how he can't understand why anyone would want to fuck a female, plus he's a virgin, and he refused to have sex with either Lara or Ciri for all his obsessing over them.

Ciri raped Avallac'h because he was refusing to have sex with her, and then she had a meltdown because even raping him, he still didn't have an erection over her.

Avallac'h - blond like he was in the novelsAvallac'h - blond like he was in the novels

And Ciri castrated Avallac'h because she was angry that he really wasn't excited over her just like he said he wasn't.

And then there's King Auberon.


Neither Avallac'h nor Auberon could get erections over Ciri. Oh, geeh, I wonder why? Maybe it had something to do with them being too busy having erections over each other?

Here have some fistech. No, don't snort it up your nose like that. You're supposed to shove it up your foreskin like this. Here watch me do it. No, that's wrong too, here let me do it for you.


Avallac'h... what... are... you... doing?

Hey look everybody! Avallac'h's teaching Ciri how to do something! Ain't he a good tutor?

Now pay very careful attention, Ciri. Avallac'h wants to make you know the correct and proper way to put fisstech under Auberon's foreskin.

And if you miss anything, let him know, because I'm certain he wants to do this again.

Avallac'h is way too invested in this endeavor.

Yes.... we can clearly see how so NOT gay, Avallac'h is here.

Uhm... what... wait.... what? Why are you shoving cocaine up your dick? Why are you shoving cocaine up his dick? 

Does Avallac'h still have that gnawed bone, he was trying to shove up Geralt's rectum? Is he about to shove THAT up Auberon's dick next? 

Does Auberon shriek with joy while Avallac'h is giddy with delight?

Is Avallach giddy with delight because he put too much fisstech up his dick?

Why is Avallac'h putting fisstech up King Auberon's dick?

Avallac'h has no boundaries. 


What the hell just happened? 

What the hell are you two doing?

Avallac'h in pink underwear and Ciri in lore-friendly skimpy black dress with slit skirtAvallac'h in pink underwear and Ciri in lore-friendly skimpy black dress with slit skirt

And what about Ciri? You two just left her there naked.

You two do realize you both just left Ciri sitting there on the bed masturbating while you two have a fisstech orgy? Oh look here's Eredin, kidnapping Ciri, while you two... yeah... you don't even notice.


Well, there goes Eredin with Ciri. Nothing? No? Too busy playing with your dicks to notice Ciri just left with Eredin?

Yeah... uhm... I really do think Avallac'h is way more gay then he's trying to admit.

Well... at least they weren't rolling around in feces while they did it. Although Eredin was talking about dung while this was happening, so I guess that counts as feces in yet another, not quite, almost sex scene.

Avallac'h's a good tutor. I bet you heard the game tell you that. Ciri says it 4 different times in the game.

Other than her watching him teach Auberon where to put his fisstech, what did Avallac'h ever teach Ciri? 

Yeah. There's a quite a lot of evidence in the novels that Avallac'h is gay, and while he deeply loves Lara emotionally, and is very affectionate of Ciri, Avallac'h is very clearly sexually attracted to King Auberon.

And while the novels don't come right out and say it, we are given enough scenes to say chances are pretty high that Avallac'h and King Auberon are a canon couple. 

Oh by the way... Geralt, Avallac'h, and King Auberon all have foreskins. I'm sure we needed to know that. Why did we need to know that? Why did Andrzej Sapkowski think to tell us this?

At least I can say this... there's nothing quite like the Witcher novels out there. They are definitely unique.

Ciri or Lara?

A closeted gay who's trying to keep up the public appearance of liking women and failing badly... I think that is how we can best describe Avallac'h.

He is in love with Lara and he also loves Ciri, but again, we saw scenes of him with each of these two women, where he simply did not want to have sex with them.

He attributes his lack of sexual desire for Lara as the REASON she left him for Creagannon. He constantly bemoans the fact that he loved her but wasn't enough for her, she wanted sex too and he simply found sex with women repulsive. He comes right out and says it: He finds the very thought of sex with women repulsive.

When Ciri start trying to get Avallac'h to have sex with her, he says it again. He tells Ciri he cares about her, loves her, will always protect her, but he doesn't want to have sex with her.

Ciri says: "But I look like your Lara" and Avallac'h answers with "I didn't want to have sex with Lara either. I've never wanted sex with any women. Not she-Elf or Dohon *(human)*."

Avallac'h is NOT sexually attracted to women... he says it in 17 different scenes.

And I know I've got at least one regular viewer who is shipping Avallac'h with Ge'els. 

Though, Ge'els is a game only character, so I don't count Ge'els as canon. I don't count ANYTHING in the game as cannon. The game is just fanfiction based off the novels after all.

Ciri or Lara?

Uh... so you just just completely ignored the fact that the banner on my channel LITERALLY SAYS: "Avallac'h & Ciri Forever" on it... 

And of course, you had to ignore the fact that I turned every sex quest girl into Cri.

Ciri and Avallac'h Forever - Banner for The Cult of Avallac'hCiri and Avallac'h Forever - Banner for The Cult of Avallac'h

...and while Lara Dorren is in the game and you often see her travelling with us, you'll also notice she's never been a sex quest girl.

Likewise while we often have Isilira traveling with us, she's never been used as a sex quest girl either.

Remember to, that in the novel Tower of Swallows, when Geralt asks Avallac'h why he buried Lara and Creganon together in the same coffin, Avallac'h's tearful answer was:

*"I could not separate the lovers in life. I will not seperate them in death."*

Though he loved Lara, she did not love him in return, and while it broke his heart to watch her with someone else, he accepted that he was unloved and unwanted, and ultimately sought comfort in Ciri.

Ciri, like Avallac'h, lived with a broken heart, mourning a dead lover. Mistle. 

While Avallac'h wanted Lara, and Ciri wanted Mistle, we ultimately saw them each consoling the other and forming a strong, unbreakable bond.

...all of which, should have answered this question before it was even asked, meaning I already answered the question...

Avallac'h and Ciri forever.

Ciri and Avallac'h Forever - Banner for The Cult of Avallac'hCiri and Avallac'h Forever - Banner for The Cult of Avallac'h

So... why not, let's take a look at HOW and WHY I came to the conclusion of: "Avallac'h & Ciri Forever" as the moto and logo of my channel...

I suppose, to really get an in depth answer, let's take an in depth look at Avallac'h, Lara, and Ciri, to see why I like him with Ciri over the others.

I found Avallac'h to be an intriguing character in the game... the game implied there was a backstory behind his actions so I went to read the novels and find out more.


Let's talk about Lara...

Avallac'h with his wraith lamp and Nibbles the catAvallac'h with his wraith lamp and Nibbles the cat

After Lara dies, Avallac'h moves to the caves of Skellige, where he becomes known as The Wraith of Moorehog, as the human clans begin to tell stories of an undead Elf that haunts the caves and graves of the islands, and the Druids of Skellige, set up camp around the cave, protecting what they say is The Ancient Unseen Elder God.

The Wraith of Morehog aka: Avallac'h, The Undead Wraith Who Haunt's Lara's Grave and How He Became That Way.: Who is The Wraith of Morehog? 

In real world Scandinavian folklore - the Wild Hunt was a group of undead elves, lead by The Wraith of Moorhogg; they traveled between worlds to kidnap human children, then days later would return those children as adults (stories like Rip Van Winkle are based on Wild Hunt legends).

In the Witcher Universe, the Wraith of Morehog is an ancient Elder God who lives in the caves under the Skellige islands. He is considered the primary god of Skellige, whom the other lesser gods (Freya, Heimdall, etc) answer to.

When you travel through Skellige, you will often encounter villagers who use the exclamation "By the Wraith of Morehog!" similar to how real people say "Oh my god!"

Avallac'h is the Witcher version of The Wraith of Moorhogg - if you listen to background characters talking in Skellige villages, you'll hear several talk about having seen The Wraith of Moorhogg on the far isles (Pali Gap where Avallac'h's lab is)

In the novels it was Avallac'h, not Eredin who lead the Wild Hunt. Geralt knows this. Geralt is fully aware who Avallac'h is and what he does - that's why in the game Geralt said "keep an eye on Avallac'h, he's not a friend"

The game however, tells us that Avallac'h was the Hunt's mage, cast out and now seen as a traitor, Caranthir replaced him. Avallac'h was the one leading the Hunt before Eredin took over.

Avallac'h with his wraith lampAvallac'h with his wraith lamp

In both the novels and the game, the Druids of Skellige warn people not to hurt nature, not to kill animals, and not to kill monsters; to not eat meat, to stray from drinking alcohol, and to live a life at one with nature, respecting all life.

They claim these are things they were taught by the Wraith of Morehog. They cite that committing such crimes will anger the Wraith of Moorehog and cause him to bring down Rag Na Roog (the 2nd Conjunction of Spheres aka the Apocalypse) on the world.

The Wraith of Morehog is an undead Elf, whom died of a broken heart, became a wraith, and now haunts the caves, tunnels, caverns, beaches, elven ruins, and forests of Skellige in search of a replacement for his dead lover. He is rumored to be the first Elder Blood, from whom all Elder Blood comes.

Though mentioned throughout the series, the identity of The Wraith of Morehog remains a mystery until Chapter 7 of the 6th book of the novel series: Tower of Swallows, when Geralt receives a message from the Druids, begging him to come to their forest.

When Geralt arrives, he is greeted by terrified Druids who inform him that The Wraith of Morehog has made contact with them, and that he, the Wraith, The Knowing One, has asked directly to speak with Geralt in regards to Ciri. They direct Geralt to a cave and instruct him to leave his sword outside and enter with caution, as the Wraith can not tolerate the presence of weapons and normally will not talk to murderers, killers, or anyone who has shed innocent blood.

Aware that he is about to meet the ancient Elder God whom is worshiped by the Druids of Skellige, Geralt does as he is told, leaves his weapons with Regis and heads into the cave.

Avallac'h with his wraith lamp, following Ciri through Velen swampsAvallac'h with his wraith lamp, following Ciri through Velen swamps

In the cave he meets a old Elf who is painting purple bisons on the wall. Geralt notes that the elf appears dead, is overly thin, has a hollow face with exaggerated cheekbones, has skeletal features, hovers several inches over the ground as he walks, and is surrounded by a glowing green wraith-halo. He also notes that the wraith has a flesh body and appears to be unaware of his own death.

The Wraith of Morehog introduces himself to Geralt as: "I am Crevan Espane aep Caomhan Macha but you may call me by my alias, Avallac'h."

Avallac'h is The Wraith of Morehog.

A Wraith is an undead creature, similar to a ghost, but able to appear in the form of a flesh body. A Wraith results when a person dies of loneliness, suicide, or a broken heart and than did not receive a proper burial.

A person becomes a wraith when they are so sad that they die from grief and their soul has sunk so deep in depression and the depths of utter despair, that they can not see any hope of happiness. Their soul becomes trapped in an aura of ever growing sadness. The sadness becomes a pin, trapping the soul at the place of their death.

Older, more powerful wraiths, are able to appear as they did in life, causing the illusion that they are still alive, and are also able to leave their place of death to travel.

Wraiths haunt graveyards, houses, ruins, caves, swamps, and brackish water locations.

A Wraith is the embodiment of sadness, a specter trapped between the land of the living and the land of the death, they will not move on to the realm of the dead until after someone who loves them, finds their bones and buries them.

As is typical of wraiths, Avallac'h wears a hood and mask when outside in daylightAs is typical of wraiths, Avallac'h wears a hood and mask when outside in daylight

Wraiths often are unaware they have died and continue to live out their life as though they were still alive.

Wraiths fear light and keep to dark areas, rarely emerging in daytime. If seen when the sun is up, they wear hoods and masks to cover their faces.

They are commonly seen at night wandering through graveyards carrying lamps.

Wraiths are sometimes described as high-class Writes with more mobility.

Also known as Soul Beckoners or Soul Eaters, they are said to feed off the souls of the living, unintentionally draining the life out of the living, in an attempt to feel alive again.

Desert Wraiths roam desert regions and are people who died in sand storms and were forgotten by their loved ones.

An Orb Wraith occured when several people were murdered, or died together, such as a mass suicide ritual, resulting in many souls rising at once and merging together into a single, multi-souled Wraith.

Many Wraiths become evil, as their sadness grows and evolves into hate. Once a Wraith realizes they are dead and that no one loved them enough to bury them, many of them become consumed with hate and thoughts of vengeance. They will often attach themselves to the soul of the person they loved and wreck havoc in their lives.

Others, like Avallac'h, died after the one they loved died, and remain at the grave of the loved one unable to move on, not realizing that they themself are now dead as well. 

A Wraith of this type will stay at the grave of their loved one for centuries, never leaving until such a time as a blood kin of their loved one is born, whom they mistake for being their loved one reborn. The Wraith will then leave the grave an attach itself to the kin of their loved one, haunting them instead of the grave.

Avallac'h looking for loot in a Nilfgaardian TentAvallac'h looking for loot in a Nilfgaardian Tent

If one has read the novels, one knows that the reason Avallac'h can not be fought or killed in the Final Boss battle of the game, is because Avallac'h is a wraith, who long again died of a broken heart and lives in an enteral state of undeath. He takes on a life-like flesh form, when he leaves Lara's grave.

The story behind Avallac'h and his love for Lara was this...

Though he rarely speaks of it and generally tries to hide it from everyone, Elves and Humans alike, Avallac'h was a genetic scientist, from about 5,000 years into Geralt's future. Avallac'h specialized the radical gene splicing experiments.

The novels and the game differ in what he does and why.

According to the game, he leads a breeding program that has set out to create a mutated race of super beings. 

In the cutscene when Geralt is interrogating him, Avallac'h starts to say that he has been kidnapping prime specimens and breeding them... he stops mid sentence, becomes frightened, and backs away from Geralt, while stammering over his words and then completely changes what he was saying, this time stating that he "brought lovers together to create specially designed children, after years of selective breeding."

The game implies that many Elven mages were involved in this program that was intended to develop a formidable race of super beings, and that Avallac'h headed this project.


In the novels, Avallac'h worked alone, and there was no organized group of mages running a gene development project.

In the novels, Avallac'h is portrayed as a very rare mutated Elf. The last of the fully pure, purest or the pure-blooded Elves. A race known as The Elder Elves.

Avallac'h with his wraith lamp at Lara Dorren's TombAvallac'h with his wraith lamp at Lara Dorren's Tomb

According to the novels, the more the Elves mixed with Humans, the less magically inclined they became. Elder Elves became seen as Elder Gods, because they possess immense god-like powers, due to their pure, untainted Elder Blood.

Avallac'h was the last of the male Elder Elves, and became incredibly lonely, and was very frustrated by the fact that he had no one understood him, understood what it was like to leave with god-like powers, in a world where few possessed any powers at all. Seeking to have a companion like himself, Avallac'h, formerly a powerful mage, turned to scientist, becoming a mad scientist, and spending 700 years on a project to clone himself and create a mate. 

Avallac'h was ruthless in his experiments, caring nothing for the Elves he used in them. He took to kidnaping pregnant she-Elves and harvesting their embrioes, then injecting the embrioes with his own blood. It was through this, that Avallac'h gained his reputation for being evil. The end result of this 700 year project, was Lara Dorren.

Lara was created from an embryo Avallac'h took from Shandell, King Auberon's wife, making Auberon, Lara's biological father. All of Avallac'h's experimental test subjects prior to Lara died before reaching adulthood.

Avallac'h with his panthers at Lara Dorren's TombAvallac'h with his panthers at Lara Dorren's Tomb

Once he had Lara, Avallac'h stopped his experiments, content in the knowledge that he had created a mate for himself. Avallac'h had no intention of continuing the breeding program, and only sought to have a happy family life with his self-created-test-tube wife Lara.

Other Elves, namely King Auberon, saw Lara as the beginning of great things. Because Lara came from his own blood, King Auberon, was convinced he could create an army of super soldiers to take over the universe.

A breeding program was set up, with many Elven mages taking over Avallac'h's work, and creating the giant-super powered Elven soldiers known as The Wild Hunt, who were essentially, the same thing to the Elves, that Witchers were to the Humans.

Auberon, seeing that Avallac'h was unwilling to help in this program, took Lara away from him and blackmailed Avallac'h into heading the genetic program that was building Wild Hunt super soldiers, under the promis Lara would be returned to him after Avallac'h helped King Auberon on his mission to conquer Human worlds. Avallac'h was thus forced to open the portals between worlds, allowing the Aen Elle to jump from planet to planet mass murdering Humans everywhere they went.

According to the game (but not the novels), opening these portals, resulted in rips in the fabric of time, that allowed the White Cold of deep space to seep into the world and destroy it with massive blizzards. Horrified by the discovery of the damage he had caused, Avallac'h set out to find a way to undo the damage and stop the White Frost. He concluded that Lara had the power to do so, and tried to convince her to seal up the tears in time, to seal the rips and stop the White Cold from coming in.

Avallac'h with Lara Dorren as she appears in Witcher 3Avallac'h with Lara Dorren as she appears in Witcher 3 (she has a file in the game but never appears in the game, we spawned her in to see what she looked like)

However, (according to the game Witcher 1) in her time away from Avallac'h, living with Auberon, Lara had grown cold, shallow, and heartless.

She cared nothing for helping others and was now a powerful sorceress, seeking power for power's sake, drunk on her ever growing lust for more power.

Lara met Creaggan, a powerful Human mage and lured him into her power driven frenzy.

Together Lara and Creaggan, became an unstoppable Bonnie and Clyde-like criminal duo.

Horrified by the crime duos planet hopping crime spree, Elves and Humans alike, rose up against Lara, to try to stop her. During this time, another Elf Illthille, rose to power and prophesied of a time soon to come when all worlds would perish, and could only be saved when a White Wolf rose to power and a Child of the Elder Blood helped him to defeat The White Cold. 

Avallac'h became a devout follower of Illthiline's Prophecy, complete changing his life, and now turning his experiments around in his search for a way to use Lara's gene to defeat the White Frost.

Lara meanwhile fell in love with Creaggan and started her extreme radical Human Rights social justice warrior protests, of slaughtering Elves to save Humans.

At first Avallac'h laughed at this, stating that Lara was an unruly child with a fiery temper and would soon give up on her Human Rights program, once she learned how short lived and insignificant Humans were. Avallac'h also stated, he didn't care if Lara cheated on him with Creaggan, because Creaggan would die in another 60 years and by than Lara would have come to her senses would return to him.

Avallac'h fully believed that Auberon would let him have Lara back, and that Lara would willingly want to come back. Avallac'h stated quite plainly that Lara would return to him and they would go back to a quiet family life, with her as his wife and the mother of his children.

When you find this tomb in the game, pay careful attention to the set of bones laying on top of the coffin... this is Avallac'h. After burying Lara here, Avallac'h laid on the coffin and never moved again. It is unknown how he died. The novel hints both to suicide and the fact that he starved to death.

Avallac'h with Lara Dorren as she appears in Witcher 3Avallac'h with Lara Dorren as she appears in Witcher 3 (she has a file in the game but never appears in the game, we spawned her in to see what she looked like)

Throughout all of this, Avallac'h never strayed from his original desire. He was the last male of his species and wanted nothing more then to have a family like everyone else.

His dream of ever having a family was shattered, when Lara announced she was pregnant with Creaggan's baby.

It was on this news that Avallac'h destroyed his work, burning his centuries of notes, and trashing his labs, before retreating underground, heartbroken and devastated.

Three versions of how Lara died, exist: one which states that Humans rose up and murdered Lara and Creaggan. One which says Elves rose up and murdered them. And one which says that in a fit of rage, Avallac'h himself murdered them.

In Chapter 7 of Tower of Swallows, Geralt meets Avallac'h hidden away in the deep depths of a cave system that leads to underground Elven ruins. Upon realizing that this is the ancient Elder  God Elf from the legends, Ciri's ancestor, the one from whom all Elder Blood flows, Geralt questions the old Elf as to how Lara really died. 

Avallac'h retells the tale of how he created Lara, how Auberon took her from him, how the Wild Hunt came to exist, how Lara left for Creaggan, and then shows Geralt Lara's grave, which is the location they are in now and the spot Avallac'h has remained, these past 200 years since her death.

Avallac'h tells Geralt that parts of all three stories are true. That he was there when Lara died, that Elves did kill Lara, that Humans also killed her. According to Avallac'h, an angry mob of Elves and Humans banded together to burn Creaggan at the stake and torture Lara. 

Avallac'h states that he tried to save them, but was only able to save their half-Elf baby, which he initially intended to raise, but after being attacked by his own people, he took the baby to the royal family and switched it with the real royal baby, thus how Ciri came to be born in said royal family.

Avallac'h tells Geralt he could not separate the lovers in life and would not separate them in death, so buried Lara and Creaggan in a single coffin, their bodies forever locked in a loving embrace. He said originally they were buried in his own family crypt, but Elves tried to destroy the graves, so he moved them to Creaggan's family crypt, but there Humans tried to destroy the graves, so Avallac'h took the bodies and hide them here in these Elven Ruins where no one ever came and no one would find them. 

Avallac'h's megascope projection in his Velen HideoutAvallac'h's megascope projection in his Velen Hideout

Geralt notes that bones lay on the coffin, a fact that Avallac'h completely ignores as he goes back to painting purple bison and giant penises on the walls of the cave.

Easy to miss is the fact that after burying Lara, Avallac'h lay down on the coffin and never got up.

Though Avallac'h is aware 200 years have passed since Lara's death, he seem oblivious to the fact that he's not left her side in that time and has no need to eat any more. Avallac'h remains unaware that he has died.

Avallac'h went on to spend the next 200 years, sitting at the grave, guarding it, not allowing anyone near it, himself becoming a Wraith, but not realizing that he has long ago died.

The novels show Avallac'h as deeply depressed and suicidal, he even comes right out and says to Geralt that he longs to die, but also states he fears to die, for there is no one who loves him, no one to bury him, and he fears becoming a Wraith.

Geralt questions if the Elf is dead or alive, states is is unable to tell if the Elf is alive and near starving to death, or if the Elf has long ago died and not yet come to realize he is dead.

Geralt notes that Avallac'h's body is shrouded in a glowing halo of light, and that Avallac'h hovers in the air, his feet not touching the ground, that his body is overly thin, and that it appears Avallac'h starved to death from going years without eating. 

Avallac'h in the novels is described as a Wraith, or Specter, a dead Elf, unaware of his own death, who guards the grave of his dead lover, and who later takes on a life-like flesh form when with Ciri.

The scene at Lara's grave in Tower of Swallows, the scene which introduces Avallac'h to the readers, implies that Avallac'h is dead, and that he had died of a broken heart, while pining away at Lara's grave, some 200 years prior to Ciri's birth. 

The fact that Avallac'h is a Wraith was also given as the reason behind his extremely prominent cheekbones, gaunt skeletal appearance, and why he does not eat.

Avallac'h and Ciri with a babyAvallac'h and Ciri with a baby - there is nothing that infuriates Ciri fans worse then the thought of her having a baby with Avallac'h

Avallac'h only leaves Lara's grave to return to the world of the living, upon the discovery that Ciri looks identical to Lara, has the same powers as Lara, and possesses Lara same unruly child, fiery temper. 

It appears, Avallac'h remains fully unaware that he has died.

Avallac'h leaves Lara's grave and becomes Ciri fierce protector and bodyguard, because he believes Ciri is Lara reborn. With Ciri in his life, Avallac'h picks up where he left off, trying to get Ciri to be his wife and bear his children so he can return to the family life he originally wanted. Once again, however, King Auberon steps in and destroys Avallac'h's hope of happiness.

It is assumed that Ciri is aware Avallac'h is a Wraith. This is implied in the game, during the scene at the Scioteal camp, when Geralt tells Ciri she should not trust Avallac'h, stating Avallac'h will eventually demand something from her. Ciri responds with "Avallac'h is different" then turns away from Geralt and says Geralt doesn't understand why she can trust that Avallac'h will never hurt her and never force her to do anything against her will, why she knows he is the only person she can trust.

In the Witcher universe, Wraith are generally evil spectars created out of deep sorrow and bound to earth by their bodies having been left unburied. It is also stated that love can free a Wraith of what binds it to its place of death. Elsewhere we are told not all Wraith are evil and that some Wraith, will bind themselves to their kin and act as their guardian spirits and protectors.

This scene in the game, implies that Ciri is aware Avallac'h is a Wraith and that he's now been freed of Lara's grave, and has bound himself instead to Ciri as her guardian and protector. This scene also implies that Ciri does not wish any one to know Avallac'h is dead or that he's a Wraith.

In both the novels and the game, we see Avallac'h can be injured and feel pain. In the Trial of Grasses scene, we see him crippled and go into a coma. As first these things were contradict that he is long dead, until one searches the nature of Wraiths.

Wraith are different then ghosts and often are unaware they have died. They continue to live as though they are alive, because of the belief that they are alive. Their mind is so convinced they still live, that they will also continue to suffer from physical harm and feel pain.

A Wraith can seemingly be killed, but will always wake back up.

In fact, we saw Uma die in the Trial of Grasses, then moments later Uma vanished and Avallac'h's Elven body reappeared.

Pay attention to the first few moments you see Avallac'h. The scene while he is still naked.. he also has the same green glow, that all other wraiths in the game have, hovering around his body. This green Wraith glow vanishes when he waves his hand and casts a spell to make it invisible once again.

Avallac'h's being unaware that he is already dead, he thus suffers serious injury during the Trail of Grasses... and yet... in spite of being crippled and unable to walk, a result of his injuries... we she Avallac'h during Vesimier's funeral, seemingly unaffected by his injuries.

Avallac'h, Geralt, and Triss at Vesemir's funeralAvallac'h, Geralt, and Triss at Vesemir's funeral

The scene of Avallac'h at Vesemir's funeral is baffling to most viewers as he goes from comats and struggling to stand, to suddenly moving fluidly across a steep mountain to pray over a dead Witcher.

This shows us that not is all what it seems with Avallac'h, for while he seemingly can be injured, he also can, at least momentarily, mentally break from of those injuries.

Avallac'h is a formidably powerful creature, but he is also so traumatized and depressed over Lara's death, and so paranoid and fearful for Ciri's safety, that his emotions get in the way of his full manifesting his powers. 

If you pay careful attention to what is being said in the game... you well see Avallac'h's corpse. For a brief moment the game shows you the dead Elf's crumbling, unburied bones, that have been left unburied for centuries, as no one knows he has dies and also no one cared when he disappeared so no one ever went looking for him to discover he was dead. Left unburied, Avallac'h became a Wraith.

In another scene in the game, we find Avallac'h's corpse, now long turned bones. During the quest Wandering in the Dark, Geralt and Keira head to Avallac'h's Velen hideout in search of the mysterious masked Elf.

When you find Keira in the game, she tells you that she was awoken on night by a mysterious masked Elf arriving at her door and asking for help.

Loot her bathroom just then, you'll find a book on the bench, which she said the Elf gave her. It's called "Elven Sages". Read the book you'll be told that Sages were rare mutant Elves who were long ago mass murdered, and ONLY ONE escaped: Ida.

The book ends by telling you that rumors exist that a 2nd Sage, a male, has been sighted in caves, ruins, and graveyards, leading to the belief that possibly a 2nd Sage still lives.

Later when you talk to Ida herself, during Ugly Baby Quest, and give her the words of the Uma Curse, she becomes horrified, and terrified, then tells you it's an ANCIENT CURSE - one that had been cast CENTURIES ago to trap an evil Sage. She tells you the Uma curse can be lifted, tells you how to lift it, then tells you not to, because by doing so, you'll be restoring a flesh body to an ancient evil.

Now pay attention here.... BEFORE lifting the Uma curse, Avallac'h ALWAYS appears with his face covered by a mask. AFTER the Uma curse is lifted and his flesh body restored, he STOPS wearing the mask.

Back to Kiera...

Kiera tells you that the Elf was looking both for Ciri and for the ingredients to PREVENT NERVE DAMAGE (he knew the Witchers would find Uma soon and lift the curse, thus why he wanted these.)

Kiera tells you that the Elf gave her a cursed skull that allows her to open portals, and would give her a magic lamp of the dead - a lamp used by Wraiths talk to the living, that also let the living talk to the dead, and he would give it to her BECAUSE HE WOULDN'T NEED IT ANYMORE SOON.

You are being told point blank that Avallac'h is a Wraith, that this lamp he's giving Keira is the one he carries to communicate with the living, and he knows he's soon to have his flesh body restored, and won't need it anymore.

The Elf had promised Keria a lamp, and she sets out to find it with Geralt's help. What they find is Lara Dorren's grave, and Geralt is surprised to see that though the coffin itself remains unopened, the bones of another body lay on the grave. 

The lamp the masked Elf had promised Keira is clutched in the frozen dead hand of this corpse. With the body, Geralt finds an old letter, one written by Avallac'h. 

The conversation between Geralt and Keira now moves to wonder who's body this is laying at Lara's grave, as the bones are too old to determine an identity. Geralt states that they are the bones of a male Elf. Keira then states she will not wait for the masked Elf to meet her here as promised as it appears he was already here and left the lamp behind for her. Keira takes the lamp from the hand of the corpse and leaves.

Keep in mind too, the mask and WHEN exactly you see Avallac'h stop wearing it.

The first half of the game he refuses to remove it at all. After the Uma curse is lifted, we see only one brief scene of him wearing it, and then he never wears it again. Why?

Listen carefully to what Yennefer said as she prepared Uma for the Trail of Grasses... she states that the body inside Uma is badly damaged, she could not determine how or why, but it was. She states that the Trail of Grasses, should restore the damaged body BACK TO ITS ORIGINAL STATE.

Wraiths, typically look like a decayed corpse. Avallac'h does not. Avallac'h wore the mask to hide that he was a Wraith. He looked dead, thus he wore the mask. During the Trial of Grasses, his body was not only restored to how it looked before the curse was cast, but it was restored to how it looked before he died.

The quest *Nameless* Avallac'h rescuing a nearly nude, topless Ciri after she fell into the ocean.... and this picture got 123,000 views in 4 days March 2020.... uhm... why?The quest *Nameless* Avallac'h rescuing a nearly nude, topless Ciri after she fell into the ocean.... and this picture got 123,000 views in 4 days March 2020.... uhm... why?

During the quest Nameless, when questioned why her friend wears the mask, Ciri become very defensive and angry, says he doesn't like anyone to look at him, and changes the subject.

Ciri indicates, here, and again later when talking to Geralt, that she is the only person who knows what Avallac'h looks like, that she's the only person he'll remove the mask for.

Even after the Uma curse is lifted, Avallac'h is careful to keep his face hidden behind a hood or a mask or both, when out in daylight, stepping outside unhooded or unmasked only at night, and even than only allowing Ciri, Geralt, and the Lodge of Sorceresses to ever see him with his hood down or mask removed. 

The implication is that not everyone can see him, as only those with magic abilities have the ability to see a Wraith's flesh-form and otherwise see a decayed corpse.

In Skellige, whenever any one mentions seeing Avallac'h, the islanders all refer to him as a Wraith or Specter, none of them recognizing him as an Elf.

In the scripted code of the game, one finds that you fight Elves with a steel sword and put hanged man's oil on your blade.

**HOWEVER...** In the scripted code of the game, one finds that you fight Avallac'h with a silver sword and put specter oil on your blade.

Avallac'h... dead. So many Ciri fans must be so please. Geralt and Ge'els are wondering what killed him. He was alive just a minute ago.Avallac'h... dead. So many Ciri fans must be so please. Geralt and Ge'els are wondering what killed him. He was alive just a minute ago.

Also in his character code of the game, Avallac'h is unable to fight NoonWraiths, NightWraith, Alps, or Bruxa, all of whom are undead and types of Wraiths. 

In the game, during the Final Boss Battle, we see Avallac'h flee with Ciri to the tower, and open a gateway portal between world, as he tries to escape the war and go back to the peaceful family life he had originally wanted with Lara.

If you pay attention to the clues the game drops, EVERYTHING Avallac'h has done throughout the game has been part of his plan to once again kidnap Ciri and take her back with him to Tir Na Lia. In the novels he is very vocal about his goal. Avallac'h makes no secret of the fact that his #1 goal is to get Ciri pregnant and have a happy family life with her and their child.

He was the last of his kind and devoted his life to finding a mate. He built Lara and when Lara left him he gave up on life. Ciri restored his desire to live, and Ciri was the first person willing to love him, thus he clung desperately to her, fiercely protecting her.

Though Ciri did not truly love him, and seemed more to pity him, she was willing to leave with Avallac'h, live with him, keep him company, and end his centuries of suffering, realizing that he was not truly a threat as the only thing he wanted was to not be alone any more.

The promise she made to him, the one you hear mentioned in the game, is she promised to live with him until such a time she got pregnant and gave him a child. He also worded his request that way, knowing full well, he was infertile and she would never bear his child, thus being forced to remain with him forever.

Avallac'h and Ciri arguing, like usualAvallac'h and Ciri arguing, like usual.

>>"I'm not accustomed to joking," he said. "And since you consider it a joke, I'll take the liberty of repeating it with due gravity. We want to have your child, O Swallow, Daughter of Lara Dorren Only when you bear it will we permit you to leave here."


>>"We have the right to demand, and we can O Swallow. Your father, Cregennan took a child from us. You will give us one back. You will repay the debt. It seems just and logical to me."


>>*[Ciri]*"If I agree, then afterwards, later, will I be free?"

>>"You'll be free and may go wherever you wish. Assuming you don't decide to stay. With the child."

>>~Avallac'h to Ciri, Lady of the Lake page 158, 159, & 165

When you find this tomb in the game, pay careful attention to the set of bones laying on top of the coffin... this is Avallac'h. After burying Lara here, Avallac'h laid on the coffin and never moved again. It is unknown how he died. The novel hints both to suicide and the fact that he starved to death.

Kalkstein was the half-gnome alchemist, who claimed to have been The Mysterious Masked Mage's lover before Lara Dorren got in the way. 

According to Kalkstein, Lara was "an evil sorceress" and "the bitch who destroyed the mage and caused his death". 

Kalkstein claims that The Masked Mage, distraught over Lara's leaving him for Creaggan, killed himself by locking himself in a tower, then blowing up the tower in order to destroy the portals between worlds.


In W1 Kalkstein tells Geralt of the lover's triangle between Lara Dorren and two mages (the Elf Avallac'h and the human Creaggon) and said that she had both men doing everything she wanted. 

Kalkstein was in love with the elf (Avallac'h) and claimed to be one of his lovers (Avallac'h is bi-sexual and in Tower of Swallows tells Geralt he had both male and female, elf and human, lovers). Kalkstein tells Geralt he was devastated when the elf mage left him for Lara Dorren. 

Kalkstein hates Lara and refers to her as "the evil bitch who destroyed the mysterious mage".

There's a quest in W1 where you help Kalkstein find The Mysterious Mage's Abandoned Tower and find it guarded by a forest made out of archspores and echinops, and to get in the tower you have to fight the infamous W1 Golem boss battle (one of the hardest bosses of any of the Witcher games).

Once inside the tower, Geralt finds the tower is actually a giant gateway portal and Kalkstein uses it to reopen the portals in the world - this how you are able to travel by portals in W3.

You spend about 20 hours of the game (Witcher 1) helping Kalkstein rebuild the Mysterious Masked Mage's tower, while he sends you into swamps to pick beggartick so he can make fisstech, which he has you selling to city guards.

Kalkstein is a wild, hyper, scatter-brained alchemist who has trouble completing a conversation with anyone, because his mind is so sde tracked with focusing on formulae and experiments as he takes over Avallac'h genetics lab and uses Avallac'h notes to try to find a way to resurrect his dead lover (Avallac'h). Much of the player's attempts to talk to Kalkstein is interrupted by his talking to himself about the mage and the evil bitch who caused his death.


Kalkstein is deeply distraught over Avallac'h's death, saying that the mysterious mage felt unloved because of the horrific way he had been abused by Lara Dorren. Kalkstein tries to hide his feelings from Geralt, but if you listen to him as he mutters to himself under his breath, you will hear him mention that he loved the mysterious mage and felt bad that the elf did not know this.

We see in Kalkstein, the horror of being left to muddle through wondering why someone you loved killed themself, and we are left to wonder, was Kalkstein always the scatterbrained crazy person we see talking to himself in the game or did he become this as a result of his lover committing suicide over another lover?

According to Kalstein, Lara was an evil sorceress who used Avallac'h to open portals between world, then left him for Creaggan once she had no more use for him. Then Avallac'h, killed himself by blowing up the tower and closing all the portals between worlds.

Kalkstein is gay and is insanely in love with Avallac'h, and it's the Kalkstein quests of W1 that are why you are able to resurrect Avallac'h's wraith back into his flesh body during the Ugly Baby quest in W3.

Kalkstein therefore comes in as yet another pairing for Avallac'h.

In the Tower of Swallows there is a scene known as the Purple Bison scene, when Geralt meets an annoying, mysterious elf. The scene goes on for 7 pages before the elf is identified as Avallac'h... since Avallac'h looks dramatically different in the game from the novel, nothing about the novel's description of the glowing, floating, blond elven wraith, indicates that you are talking to Avallac'h.

Geralt can't tell which direction is up or down in the Elder God's glowing cave, as the Elder God Elf is himself walking on walls and ceiling as much as he's walking around the floor.

And if you've played the game before reading the novels EVERYTHING about this scene indicates you are talking to the Unseen Elder of the game... which you are, it's just that in the novels Avallac'h is the Unseen Elder God who is made out of time,  has dead women behind his house, and hoards mirrors.

###Yep... Avallac'h, the Unseen Elder, Guatner O'Dimm, and Whoreson Junior are ALL THE SAME PERSON.

The Unseen Elder, Guatner O'Dimm, and Whoreson Junior do not appear in the novels. They are game only characters, based off of Avallac'h's novel character. The game devs felt it would be too redundant in the game, if all the things done by Avallac'h in the novels, were done by one character in the game, thus Avallac'h's one very multifaceted character in the novels was divided up into several separate characters for the game.

By the 3rd page of the Purple Bison scene, Geralt has had feces thrown at him, his sword stolen, his friend Regis poofed out of the room to who knows where, told to go climb back up a tree like a good little ape, learned the best ways of taking fistech, been taught the differences of sex with she elves vs sex with women, how to tell the proper timing of when to have sex with female, learned the history of phallic cults, been taught about all the various types of orgasms, all while the elf is painting penises on the wall... because he knows he's distracting the sex crazed witcher he's talking to.

Avallac'h's statue of Lara as it appeared in the game Witcher 2Avallac'h's statue of Lara as it appeared in the game Witcher 2

Geralt points out that most of them are of human children, many of them crying.... and the elf states:

"Yes, they were unruly and in the way."

Avallac'h goes back to obsessing over the statue of Lara, which he, tells Geralt he has sex with it... yeah, he has sex with statues of Lara... okay... Avallac'h's insane.

When the stunned Witcher asks why the elf would do what he does with this statue of Lara, the elf suddenly introduces himself, and now we know who he is, Avallac'h then goes into monologue of Lara's entire history, the hows and whys of how he cloned himself to make her, along with a hate filled rant about Creaggon of Lod, whom the elf points out is also buried here with Lara, and then suddenly Avallac'h asks Geralt where Ciri is.

Geralt admits he has no clue where Ciri is, and the happy, bubbly, giddy elf, turns into a furiously ranging madman, telling Geralt he's fully aware Geralt doesn't know where she is, tells Geralt what Vilgefortz has been doing to Ciri, then goes of on a rant about Ciri being the mother of the Child of the Elder Blood, and that Geralt's job of taking care of Ciri is being removed, because Cirri has a new protector, one that actually cares about her.

The scene of Geralt having to choose between Ciri and Dandelion happened, Geralt hates Ciri's annoying, whinny, bitchiness so chooses Dandelion, thus infuriating Avallac'h.

Geralt gets poofed back to Regis and his sword returned, tells Regis what happened, Regis goes nuts and sets out after Avallac'h trashing everything he can find along the way.

Well if this ain't a lore friendly picture I don't know what is! Ciri prancing around in her panties, distracting Avallac'h, who also seems to have lost his clothes.

Ciri meanwhile is locked in a cage in Leo's castle. She has just been brutally tortured, severely  wounded, and is expecting to die here.

All of her friends (The Rats) have been murdered, including her beloved Mistel (Ciri's 40 year old lesbian lover - and reminder, Ciri is only 12 years old in the novels.)

Mourning the loss of her dead lover Mistel, and assuming everyone else (Dandelion, Yen, Geralt, Corrywobbles, Shani, Regis, and the rest) are dead too, Ciri is losing hope of anyone rescuing her, as fast as she's losing every last drop of blood from her festering wounds.

In spite of the powers that **the GAME** claims she has, Ciri has no real powers to speak of in the novels, other then seeing visions and dreams of the future. Ciri is a conduit of power, a battery that can be used by mages to gain power, but Ciri herself has no ability to do a single damned thing... not one single, solitary thing at all. 

In the novels the only power Ciri has, is visions and dreams of the future.

Ciri possesses blood that can be drained from her and used to create powerful spells, thus why she is now laying in a cage, bleeding to death, after Leo, got done draining her blood from her.

Kidnapped dozens of times before, by dozens of other, generally very weak and insignificant, mages, and never once able to escape them either, Ciri has no hope of escaping the megalomaniac Leo. 

And as her ONLY ability is seeing the future, she has no ability to use "her powers" to try to escape. Ciri does not know how to tap into the power that is in her blood. No one has trained her to do this, no one has even informed her that she could do this.

Ciri suddenly finds herself able to leave her cage, and makes a mad dash run out of Leo's castle, straight to the tower that has plagued her nightmares, and before she knows what is happening, finds herself falling out of a portal in the sky and landing in Avallac'h's lap.

Avallac'h and Unicorns... why weren't the Unicorns chasing him in the game like they were in the novels?

The first time Ciri sees Avallac'h, he's in a field of pink flowers and unicorns, playing a flute that causes the women around him to throw their clothes off and run after him through the fields.

Ciri spends 8 weeks living with the absent minded old elf, before he ever thinks to tell her his name. During that time he treats her like a Barbie doll, dressing and undressing her, bathing her, doing her hair and make-up, overall acting like she was a toy then a real person. The more time he spends with her, the more bitchy his wives get at Ciri.

Ciri and the elf spend page after page together. The elf being overjoyed to finally meet Ciri, and rushing around dragging her with him as he goes hyper puppy, screaming fan boy yippy-skippies all over his town introducing Ciri to everything and everyone.

We now see Ciri being treated like a special little princess, given a silver sword, put in a lavish bedroom of a fairy-tale palace, bathed in perfumed bath water, dressed in fine silks, taken for daily walks around the lake, and daily taking long horseback rides accompanied by the mysterious, as of yet unidentified elf, who is clearly madly in love with Ciri.

Avallac'h and Ciri, blond as they should be, and Ciri in black like she should be.

At every turn Ciri marvels at how terrified everyone is of this mysterious elf, whom they refer to an an ancient Elder God returned, and who has every man, woman, and child bowing before him and trembling at his feet. People scurry away in fear when they see him walk through the streets.

Ciri has yet to meet any other elf, for the other elves so clearly live in mortal terror of this mysterious elf who has taken her in.

Ciri determines that if everyone is scared of him, then he must be evil and she must be a prisoner, and she must therefore smash everything he owns and beat him up as often as possible, to let him know she's got the upper hand. So she daily proceeds to smash everything that Ciri thinks the elf might care about and hit him and punch him as often as possible, for no reason at all.

When the elf asks her why she does these things, asking why she "returns evil for kindness" why does she hurt him when he's done nothing to hurt her, why does she destroy his things after he has given her so much, she responds to say: 

**"Because I felt like it and there's nothing you can do to stop me, SO THERE!"**

He responds to say she's inherited her mother Lara's fiery temper and let's Ciri continue on her daily bughts of senseless, unjustified violence. While muttering to himself as he watches her destroy everything he owns, saying that she also "acts barbaric, destructive, and violent like her father Creaggon".

In spite of how well she is treated and cared for, Ciri persists in beating up the elf, smashing everything he owns, and calling him her gallor, claiming he has made her his prisoner.

Hurt by Ciri's accusations, the elf becomes deeply upset and explains he had nothing to do with the portal that brought her to him, stating that she herself opened the portal and destiny brought her to him, that he knew she was coming because he saw it happen in a dream, but he did know when she'd arrive and he'd been sitting in that field waiting for her for 400 years. 

He adds that he has not imprisoned her, that she was dirty, weaponless, wearing rags, injured, and without a place to live when she landed on him. He adds that the sword she now carries was a gift he gave her, as were the dresses she wears, the bed she sleeps in, the roof over her head, even the 700 year old one of a king antique mirror she smashed this morning.

He points out that her black pegasus Kelpie was thin and unhealthy when she arrived, and he too now has food, grooms, and a stable.

Then he says that she is his guest not his prisoner, and is free to leave whenever she finds a way to do so. He tells her there is no way to get back to the tower on her world, that the portal in the tower here is one way only bringing things here. He tells her she is free to leave his palace and go wherever she wants, than states that his planet is dangerous for humans and he sought only to protect her from harm. 

I love the sunsets in this game. Avallac'h with his horse Rudy and an amazing purple sunset in White Orchard.

She accusing him of bribing her and states all the things he gave her was just his way of making her imprisonment seem like she wasn't a prisoner.

Avallac'h says she was dirty, wounded, and dressed in rags when she fell on him and that cleaning her body, healing her wounds, and giving her new clothes had been meant to help her not bribe her.

He states he does not understand why she beats up up and breaks his things, why she returns evil for good, stating his feelings are hurt by how she has behaved deplorably and reacted so brutishly to his kindness.

Avallac'h then calls her an unruly child, a wild animalistic brute, ill mannered and completely lacking in how to be civil. States that she is nothing like her mother Lara no matter how much she looks like her.

Ciri states the elf has mistaken her for someone else as Pavetta not Lara is her mother. the elf waves this aside and states that he cares nothing for the insignificant generations between Ciri and Lara, what matters is Lara died giving birth to a half-elf fathered by Creaggan of Lod and that's not what she was supposed to do, and with Lara dead and Ciri all that's left of her Ciri will take Lara's place and do what Lara was supposed to do.

Ciri, confused, asks what he intends her to do, and he says she's going to give him the child that Lara was supposed to give him.

Avallac'h, Corrine, and Sarah

At this point Ciri states she's lived with him for 8 weeks and he hasn't even yet told her his name, how does he expect her to have a baby with him.

The Elf apologizes for this oversight, introduces himself as Avallac'h, then repeats what he already said, that he's waiting for Ciri to give him a baby.

Ciri responds by running through Avallac'h's palace once again smashing everything while the confused and clueless elf tries to figure out what Ciri is upset over.

While spoiled brat, violent, psycho bitch, kiss my ass, royal princess Ciri does yet another of her smash and trash of things not belonging to her, Avallac'h monologues on how very logical it is for her to give him a baby. All the hows and whys and perfectly calculated calculations of what a perfect match they are for each other and how wonderful it will be for her, what an honor it'll be, for her to be the MOTHER of the Child of the Elder Blood (his blood, he being the Elder God Elf).

After 8 days of "You're supposed to give me a baby" versus "Fuck off you parasite, I'm a lesbian. You ain't getting in me. I'm never giving you a baby" ... Avallac'h tells Ciri he knows how to send her back to her home planet, back to Geralt and Yennefer, and he will do so, just as soon as she gives him a baby.

Hey look! It's baby Caranthir! How many Ciri fans do you suppose got so pissed off by this picture that they instantly dropped dead of a heart attack? Avallac'h with Ciri's baby that she had after she raped him.

At this point 5 of Avallac'h's wives gang up on Ciri and the frightened little weakling, who has absolutely no magical powers to speak of at all, no matter what the game told you, finds herself running tearfully into the arms of the only person on the planet who doesn't want to beat the shit out of her - Avallac'h.

When you consider the fact that Ciri is a weak, powerless, little nothing with only 1/1,000th the powers of Lara, who had only 1/1,000th the powers of Avallac'h has (according to the novels) and yet Ciri is so powerful that humans consider her a god.... and then people wonder why Avallac'h sees humans as insignificant as humans see bugs.

In spite of being more powerful then other humans, even the weakest and least magical elf has more power in it's little finger, and Ciri is woken up to the harsh reality of the fact, outside of the human world, she's a weak little nothing and if Avallac'h wasn't there, she'd have been dead long ago.

Avallac'h chases the heavily armed, Amazonian warrior, bitchy she-elves away, and drags Ciri off to the other side of the lake, in what was clearly about to become a sex scene as the elf seduces the frightened girl.

The reader is now told that this is the first time in some 2,000 years that the paranoid old elf has gotten out of range of the protection of his fierce female bodyguards, and suddenly Ciri is stunned to find she and Avallac'h under attack by a herd of blood thirsty elf murdering unicorns who are hell bent on killing Avallac'h.

Ciri witnesses the horror of why people tip-toe around Avallac'h in mortal terror, as the old elf unleashes his sonic scream that explodes the heads of the unicorns.

While a second onslaught of unicorns tramples the exploded bodies of the first, Avallac'h grabs Ciri and runs back for the she-elves, who have seen what is happening and now running head on into the oncoming army of unicorn warriors.

Unable to outrun the unicorns, Avallac'h casts a spell on the 5 she-elves, using his sonic scream again, this time amplifying it, and multiplying it by 5 through the voices of the she-elves.

>>NOTE - the sonic scream you see Cri do at Kaer Morhen, is a repeat of this same thing. It is NOT Ciri doing the scream - it is Avallac'h putting it in her, that's why he's able to stop it when she gets out of control.

>>Ciri DOES NOT have the ability to shatter things with her scream, that why she couldn't do it again when she tries to at Avallac'h lab. The scream was Avallac'h taking control of Ciri, not Ciri screaming herself.

With his sonic scream now amplified by the 5 she-elves, the rest of the unicorns are massacred in a bloodbath of exploded brains.

As Avallac'h drags Ciri back to their horses, the she-elves gather around acting as a flesh shield to Avallac'h, while a 3rd onslaught of unicorns rains down on them.

The terrified elf is too weak from his first two attacks to continue to fight, and is now surrounded on all sides by the murderous unicorns, while the she-elves stand around him and Ciri crossbows aimed ready to kill the attackers.

Eredin, a commanding officer of the Aen Elle army, jumps from a portal, followed by several of his soldiers. Eredin and the soldiers fight off the rest of the unicorns, while Avallac'h gets on a horse with Ciri and rides off to the forest to hide.

Once the unicorns are dead. Eredin returns, then gives Avallac'h hell, bullying and belittling the old elf for his foolishness of chasing after a human. 

Eredin states that the King is furious with Avallac'h because the girl (Ciri) was to be his (the king's) and Avallac'h is a traitor for running off with Ciri and trying to take her for himself. 

Eredin orders Avallac'h to take Ciri back to the palace and give her to Auberon like he was supposed to do.

Ciri notes that Avallac'h is terrified of Eredin and clearly is also terrified of King Auberon. Ciri has her rant of how Eredn is evil because he's black and everyone who is black is evil. Then rants that Avallac'h is good because he is white and everyone who is white is good. 

Avallac'h is too weak to make the two hour horse ride back to Tir na Lia and he collapses in the forest. 

Eredin, suddenly shows a softer, more compassionate side, mentions being worried about the health of King Auberon's elderly court mage, and sets up a campfire, then instructs Ciri to take care of Avallac'h, telling her the old elf is too weak to travel. 

Eredin tells Ciri that Avallac'h is the most important elf of any elf, because he's the source of the Elder Blood, thus he must be protected and cared for, but he's old, in failing health, very weak, and lives foolishly. 

Eredin explains that, because of his Elder Blood, Avallac'h was intended to be their savior, that Avallac'h was to be bred to a female Elder Blood (Lara Dorren) under the belief that a child from two Elder Blood parents, would be powerful enough to stop the White Cold.

But while Avallac'h was willing to breed with Lara, Lara was not willing to breed with Avallac'h, and the evil traitorous bitch spitefully had a baby with a Human instead.

Cii at first does not understand why this made Lara a traitor, assuming Lara could easily have a second baby, this one with Avallac'h, until being told that each she-elf can only bare one child in her lifetime, and Lara being the only female Elder Blood wasted her one chance to save them.

The situation was made worse by the fact that Avallac'h had fallen in love with Lara and since Lara's death was refusing to breed with any one any more. 

Avallac'h himself, told Ciri that he had intended to wait for Creaggan to die, as the human only had another 60 years of life in him at most, at which point Avallac'h intended to once again pursue Lara, keeping her and her child with Creaggon, intending to then have a baby with Lara's child instead of Lara. 

This plan went awry when Lara and Creaggon were murdered while Lara was 8 months pregnant.  Avallac'h stated that he tried to save all 3 of them, but was only able to save the baby, but was then pursued by Lara's killers and was forced to hide the baby in a nearby castle, by switching it with the royal family's human baby.

Thus how Lara's 4th great-granddaughter Ciri came to be born heir to the crown and a 1/4 Elf in a human family.

Eredin explains to Ciri that Avallac'h still intends to do what he was raised to do and breed with another female Elder Blood, one of Lara's descendants... specifically Ciri...

Only problem with that plan is King Auberon has now forbidden Avallac'h from doing this, because Auberon has decided that he's going to be the father of the child that is to be the saviour of the Aen Elle.

Thus why Eredin is here now, on King Auberon's orders, to take Ciri away from Avallac'h, before Avallac'h has a chance to get her pregnant.

The Aen Elle will not risk losing Avallac'h. He is the first and only natural born Elder Blood. All other Elder Bloods are a result of cloning Avallac'h's blood. Lara Dorren was the first of these clones to successfully have the same Elder Blood as Avallac'h, complete with being nearly as powerful magically, as Avallac'h himself. Lara died giving birth to a half-elf baby fathered by the human mage Creaggan of Lod. All other Elder Bloods afterwards (including Ciri) are mutated hybrids descended from Lara.

The Aen Elle Elves are desperate to create another Lara. Their goal was to gain control of an Elder God and use it to create another Elder God, then breed the two together to make an even more powerful god, one that they could control.

However it took 700 years to create Lara and she died at only 21 years old and Avallac'h was too in love with Lra to comply with any order to create another Lara, leaving the breeding program and locking himself in Lara's tomb.

With news of Ciri's being a near duplicate of Lara, the Aen Elle revived their hope of breeding Avallac'h to another Elder Blood once again. It is believed that if King Auberon (Lara Dorren's biological father - the sperm donor for her creation) breeds with Ciri, the resulting child will be another Lara. Ciri's child will then go on to be bred by Avallac'h, creating the Saviour of the lives.

Avallac'h was complying with these orders, until he saw Ciri and realized she looked just like Lara. Thus why he took her back to his palace on the lake, instead of taking her to King Auberon's palace in the city. And why he now finds himself with Eredin here chewing him out over not taking Ciri to the king.

Avallac'h lives a sheltered life. His freedom is limited. He lives with relative freedom, so long as he obeys the King's orders to breed with whomever is deemed worthy of being bred by the Elder God Elf. Avallac'h's lands and titles are more bribes then anything else. This because the Aen Elle will not risk losing Avallac'h. Male elves are incredibly rare, the likelihood of another male Elder Blood ever being born is slim. Fewer then 12 elves are born every hundred years, only 1 in every 7 babies is born male, and most males are born sterile. Though a mage and now likely infertile, Avallac'h in his youth was one of the rare few fertile males, and this cost him his freedom.

King Auberon

Ciri does not fully understand why the Elves want her, nor does she understand why the Elves treat Avallac'h with such great care.

Avallac'h is still viewed as the last male able to father the saviour child with the new Lara, once they have a new Lara, but Avallac'h is now 2,000 years old, very frail, in failing health, and the Elves fear he'll not live long enough for them to create a new Lara. 

Ciri also sees that while Avallac'h is clearly treated like a pampered pet and can have any woman he wants, he absolutely refuses to have sex with anyone, stating he'll not cheat on Lara.

Thus the importance of Ciri and why the King is now furious to find out that Avallac'h has been hiding the fact that Ciri is here. Ciri was to be given to the King, have a baby with the King, that baby used to build a new Lara, and the new Lara once again given to Avallac'h, so he can bred her as he was intended to do with the first Lara. Instead, Avallac'h ran off with Ciri, keeping her for himself, making Avallac'h a traitor to the King, as Eredin is now explaining to Ciri.

We see here that Eredin would very much like to kill the old elf and be done with him. We see too, that Eredin doesn't dare hurt Avallac'h and risk bringing down the wrath of every last Aen Elle for killing their last hope for being saved from the White Frost.


Eredin goes back and forth between belittling and mocking Avallac'h to glorifying and praising him.

It becomes clear that Eredin looks up to Avallac'h as though he were a god, but at the same time is very jealous of Avallac'h's high ranking position as the king's court mage, which places Avallac'h 2nd in command of the entire planet. 

Eredin also tells Ciri that in truth Avallac'h leads the Alder Elves, not the King, because Avallac'h keeps the king drugged with fisstech, then gives commands to the king.

That there is a power struggle between King Auberon, his court mage Avallac'h, and his army's general Eredin, is made very clear now.

All of this ranting from Eredin happens while Avallac'h is laying passed out on the ground at his feet. We see that Eredin could easily kill the ancient sorcerer here in this scene, but does not seek to harm the old Elf, and instead just wants Avallac'h out of the way of his (Eredin's) path to reach the throne.

Eredin moves Avallac'h to the campfire, orders Cirri to take care of him, saying the mage is weak from having cast too many high powered spells. 

Avallac'h regains consciousness, as Eredin is telling Ciri that Avallac'h is weak because he has put up a barrier around the city to prevent the King from knowing Ciri was here, and another barrier around his palace by the lake, to keep Ciri from escaping.

Eredin states that the only reason he was able to break through Avallac'h's barrier and help when the unicorns attacked, was because Avallac'h had gotten distracted by his lusts for Ciri and was no longer manually holding the spells active.

Ciri asks how far the barrier extends and Avallac'h attempts to lash out at Eredin, angry that Eredin told Ciri about the barriers, but Eredin shoves Avallac'h back to the ground, and tells him, laughs saying he knows Avallac'h too well and knows he is too weak to stand, let alone try to fight or cast any more spells, and says that Ciri is a stoat in the henhouse and would have found a way to escape Avallac'h's barriers sooner or later.

Ciri notes that Avallac'h clearly hates Eredin, and wonders had the socoeror not been in this weakened state, if Eredin would have been so bold. Seeing Avallac'h lunge at the officer's throat, Ciri wonders how dangerous Avallac'h is, pointing out that it appeared he was well accustomed to stranginngling people to death.

Eredin fusses over Avallac'h, making sure the area is a safe place to leave the weakened sorcerer, then gathers up his soldiers and leaves, stating that he has left guards to watch out for any more attacks... and to make sure that Avallac'h doesn't sneak off in the night and run away with Ciri again. 

Eredin states the guards are to accompany Avallac'h and Ciri, to ensure that once he is well enough to travel, Avallac'h takes Ciri back to the King, and doesn't try to run away with her again.

Before leaving, Eredin stops long enough to tell Ciri he'd gladly fuck her even though she was nothing but "Avallac'h's gold nugget plucked from dung heap" and then rambles on about how jealous he is that Ciri is about to go to King Auberon.

After Eredin is gone, Ciri tells Avallac'h, she hates Eredin and will never let that bastard fuck her. Avallac'h states she won't have to worry about it as he'll never let Eredin have her.

Ciri looks after Avallac'h while the 5 she-elves stay alert and ready to kill anything that moves, while Eredin's soldiers watch Avallac'h ready to kill him, if he tries to sneak off with Ciri again.

Ciri notes that Avallac'h has changed dramatically, no longer smiling, no longer laughing, his eyes constantly scanning the area looking for a way to escape from Eredin's soldiers.

When Ciri asks why the unicorns attacked, she notes that at the mention of unicorns, Avallac'h become highly agitated, very frightened, and begins having a panic attack, having difficulty breathing. And Ciri wonders if Avallac'h had really passed out from casting too overpowered a spell, or if he had actually passed out from being so terrified at the sight of unicorns.

Either way, we learn that Avallac'h has a weak heart, and that the other elves fear he will die from a heart attack before another female Elder Blood is found for him to breed with. And Ciri now realizes that Avallac'h is a prisoner here among the Aen Elle. Ciri starts to see the other Elves in a new light, realizing now that Avallac'h has no friends among them, for he is nothing but a tool they are using to get their saviour baby from. 

We see now too, that the reason Avallac'h oly talks about sex, is he's never been allowed to do anything else. He was raised to be a breeder and has never been treated as anything but an animal to be bred. Though The Knowing One, his life has been spent being an imprisoned sex slave, resulting in his serious lack of normal social skills and his not knowing how to have a conversation about anything other then sex.

Ciri finds herself perplexed and confused by the Alder Elves, for they treat Avallac'h as though he were their god, yet, they keep him imprisoned and are using him to try to breed an even more powerful god.

When Ciri questions the unicorn issue further, all Avallac'h will say on the matter is "We had a lovers spat." Ciri drops the subject upon seeing tremors wrack the old elf's body, fearing that the thought pof unicorn will cause him to pass out once again.

We are told that Ciri and Avallac'h sleep together by a campfire with Avallac'h embracing Ciri, but that they do not have sex, as Avallac'h is now too scared of Auberon to have sex with Ciri. 

The indication here is had Auberon not sent Eredin after them, and had the unicorns not attacked, this would have been quite different.

This is the first time we see Ciri trusting Avallac'h, and after this we no longer see her constantly beating him up and smashing his things, as Ciri now sees the bigger picture of the situation and realizes Avallac'h is not a threat and was telling the truth about wanting to protect her from the dangers of his planet.

We have also now learned that King Auberon was the one who wanted Ciri brought to this planet, that it was his idea to get a baby out of Ciri for saving the world, and that Avallac'h was obeying those orders until he realized Ciri looked exactly like his dead Lara, and now Avallac'h was wanting to keep Ciri for himself to replace Lara, thus why he had not told Auberon Ciri was here, and why Avallac'h had been daily taking Ciri for walks by the lake, several hours away from the city, as he hoped Auberon would not find out about Ciri's arrival.

Ciri no longer sees Avallac'h as her captor and sees him as being just as much a prisoner here as she is. She also is now aware that grave dangers exist on this planet and Avallac'h truely was just trying to protect her, as he had said, and was not keeping her a prisoner.

Ciri starts talking with Avallac'h about the baby again. Avallac'h says he'll return her to Geralt and Yennefer, as promised, to the same time as from when she left, so no time will have passed for Geralt and Yen, as soon as she gives birth to Lara's baby. He then adds that he hoped by that time she would have changed her mind and be willing to stay with him to raise the child.

We now learn that though he wants to help save a dying planet, Avallac'h has far deeper goals of his own and would much rather forget about saving the world and just have the family he originally wanted to have with his Lara back.

Ciri mentions the field of feainnewedd flowers that grew on the hill beside the palace where she was born and is surprised to see Avallac'h break down in tears, at the mention of this place, which unknown to Ciri is the spot where Lara died.

Ciri starts to pity the old elf, realizes how sad and lonely he is and decides to let him fuck her and give him a baby, and is now surprised when he says he can not and will not have sex with her, because she belongs to Auberon and it is Auberon who is to father the baby.

Avallac'h tells Ciri she can live with him no more as he has to turn her over to Auberon like he was supposed to do when she arrived.

We learn here, that the palace Avallac'h lives in on the lake, is NOT in Tir na Lia, as he now tells Ciri they must go to Tir na Lia in the morning, once there, she'll meet Auberon. He can keep her with him no longer, now that King Auberon knows she has arrived. Likewise he can no longer take her on walks and horse rides around the lake as, he did not have Auberon's permission to be doing these things with Ciri.

We see Avallac'h here, go from the chirpy, happy, bubbly personality, singing and dancing around fields like a hyper happy child high on sugar, he was doing when we first meet him, to a now somber, sadder, depressed personality, no longer laughing, smiling, singing, or dancing.

The prospect of losing Ciri and turning her over to the king, leaves Avallac'h emotionless and stoic in the following scenes.

Upon returning to Tir na Lia, Avallac'h sends Ciri off to King Auberon.

Auberon viciously teases, bullies, and belittles Cri, sadistically delighting in going out of his way to hurt her feelings as much as possible by conjuring up images of Yennefer being bloodily tortured to death. Leaving Ciri to be tormented by nightmares of "mummy being murdered".

As days turn to weeks, Auberon's abuse of Ciri grows worse, with Ciri every night fleeing King Auberon to seek comfort from Avallac'h.

Avallac'h, at the beginning of chapter 5, was living in his own palace overlooking the lake, but now that Ciri has been turned over to King Auberon, Avallac'h has moved into the king's palace as well and is staying the the bedroom closest to Ciri's. 

Ciri spends her days with Avallac'h and her nights with Auberon, as the scenes of this psychedelic chapter begin to twist and blurr in a quick back and forth swinging mesh of broken sentences and half said dialogue, making it INCREDIBLY DIFFICULT to read or even understand what is happening.

Chapter 5 is written in this manner, as it was intended that the reader see the world, the same way Ciri was seeing it while high on fisstech. 

Many scenes start with Ciri in Auberon's silk covered bed and then switch suddenly to Ciri waking up in Avallac'h's mink fur covered bed, with Ciri not sure how she got from one room to the other or what happened in between.

The reader is left, not knowing everything that happens in these scenes, because Ciri herself is too high to know what is going on and can not describe clearly what either Avallac'h or Auberon are doing to her.

Avallac'h begins actively putting drugs in EVERYTHING: Ciri's eyeliner, food, drinks, perfume, and bathwater. He likewise starts doing the same thing to King Auberon... additionally, Avallac'h give Auberon a magic mirror and straight up pure powdered fisstech, which Auberon begins taking on alarming levels, snorting it off the mirror.

Before long we have scenes of Auberon higher then heck, spinning around like a top, while blowing bubbles through a bubble wand and singing about the rainbow colours of everything; while Ciri is describing everything as having turned into candy, and Avallac'h is sitting there playing his flute while women entranced by the flute start stripping naked.

Meanwhile servants are disappearing, and every day more and more very life like marble statues, that look suspiciously like the missing servants are showing up in the garden out front of the palace, while the cult like citizens worship massive statues of a snake eating its tail and saying The Knowing One, The Ancient Elder God, The Source of The Elder Blood has returned.

Avallac'h appears to be the only one NOT taking fisstech, as he orchestrates this absolute meltdown of the sanity of everyone in the palace, except for Eredin. Avallac'h's motives seem to be conflicting, with him daily telling Ciri to get pregnant with Auberon's baby, and nightly encouraging Auberon to take so much fisstech that he never touches Ciri because he's too high to know what he's doing. 

Avallac'h's dark side is unleashed as we see his sadistic delight in watching humans be fucked by elves. A habit of his that seems to grow worse the more fisstech he uses.

The scene that sends most readers running for their Avallac'h murdering pitchforks unfolds, as Avallac'h becomes obsessed with idea of watching Auberon rape Ciri, and is now seen "preparing" Ciri to be fucked by Auberon, in the scene that instigates readers to refer to him as "the date rape guy".

Avallac'h's own lusts for Ciri begin spinning out of control, with Eredin watching and realizing he can use this to kill the king (Auberon) and blame it on his court mage (Avallac'h)...

...as it become boldly clear that while Avallac'h is now holding Ciri down in Auberon's bed, while Auberon molestes her, that it's Avallac'h who wants to fuck the girl, not Auberon, and Avallac'h's fast going out of his mind because Auberon won't let Avallac'h fuck Ciri, nor will Auberon fuck her himself, and both the two sex crazed, fisstech overdosed Elves (Avallac'h and Auberon) are fast reaching breaking points that could easily get them at each other's throats, fighting over Ciri.

It becomes clear that Avallac'h is complying with Auberon's orders and doing everything possible to get Ciri in bed with Auberon, while also doing everything possible to make sure Auberon won't fuck Ciri, while also wanting to watch Auberon fuck Ciri. 

Avallac'h's twisted bipolar mind has him both wanting to watch others fuck Ciri, while his raging jealousy doesn't want anyone near Ciri.

Interestingly... we have seen DOZENS of men do very similar things to Ciri throughout the novels. The difference here, is in previous scenes the men were brutal, beating her, cutting her with knives, torturing her in cages. 

We are now in the last novel of the set and this is the first time we've seen this sort of event occur in a bedroom, with Ciri being lavishly pampered, and NOT being harmed by either of the men who are holding her down. 

And I say "interesting" because, this is also the first time an event like this is NOT a rape scene, but rather, this scene started out with Ciri herself going to Avallac'h and Auberon, and REQUESTING they do this. 

Why? Because Avallac'h was very kind, gentle and loving to Ciri, while the other men were rough and abusive of her.

And then as Avallac'h says: "You need to be gentle with your lover, so she accepts you, moist and hot. Her body sizzled beneath your tender caress."

Like Eredin, Ciri too has started to realize Avallac'h and Auberon are not as friendly towards each other as it seems, and she has realized that she can use sex to manipulate them into fighting over her, which is what we see happening in this scene.

Ciri has concluded that the only way the Elves will let her leave is if she gives them a baby. She's also realized that the only elf who wants to have sex with her is Avallac'h, but Auberon isn't letting Avallac'h fuck Ciri. Thus Ciri staged this scene in order to try to get Avallac'h so out of his mind horny over her that'd he'd just fuck her anyways, irregardless of Auberon's orders.

However... all she succeeds in doing is getting the Elves fighting over her and neither fuck her.

Auberon continues to nightly abuse Cri, who then runs to Avallac'h and cries herself to sleep in his arms while he sings whale songs and bird chirps to her (keeping in mind that Avallac'h in the novels is mute and speaks through audible hums and chirps, when not using brain pulsing telepathy)

After a long night of fighting with Auberon, Ciri asks Avallac'h to take her on his boat, wishing they could return to his palace on the lake, where she had lived with him, before they came to the city to live with the king.

Ciri spends the day on the boat with Avallac'h. He asks her what is wrong, why is she upset. She says, he is The Knowing One, he knows every thought in her head, so he already knows whats wrong. 

He tells her, yes, he does know exactly what is wrong, but he also knows that she wants to talk about it, and also, because he is The Knowing One, no one ever talks to him, thinking he has no need to be talked to, since he already knows everything before it's said. Thus he has no one to talk with him, is lonely and likes to hear her talk to him.

Ciri spends hours talking to Avallac'h about absolutely everything, focusing mostly on how frustrated she is that Auberon is demanding a baby from her, yet is refusing to fuck her or let anyone else fuck her.

Ciri tells Avallac'h what Auberon says he wants the baby for, and Avallac'h explains that Auberon's goals will never happen, he won't let them. When Ciri asks for an explanation, readers get the longest monologue of the novels, from Avallac'h as he explains in full detail the prophecy, why he created Lara, what Lara was to do (have his baby) and that Avallac'h is now going to make a new Lara, but he needs another baby to match Lara.

Avallac'h now tells Ciri that Auberon and Shandel were Lara's biological parents, but he took the fetus and mixed his own Elder Blood with it, to create Lara in his lab (meaning on some levels Avallac'h is also Lara's father as she is his clone.)

Avallac'h explains that Ciri has the same powers as Shandel, meaning if she has a baby with Auberon, that baby should produce yet another Lara, which Avallac'h says he will keep and she (the baby from Ciri) will grow up to have his (Avallac'h's) baby, and that baby (the one he father's with Ciri's baby from Auberon) will be the one to stop the White Cold.

Avallac'h adds that the situation was made complicated, however, as Avallac'h had not been aware Ciri looked so much like Lara, before she arrived and, now he was questioning, the step of needing Auberon, because he found himself wanting Ciri, instead of waiting for Ciri's baby with Auberon. 

Avallac'h states that he wants to save the lives of the Aen Seidhe Elves and the Humans, on Ciri's planet, stating that the White Frost has already killed Geralt, but because he is The Knowing One, he knows how to manipulate time and can return Ciri back to the same day she left.

When Ciri asks, why she (Ciri) can't stop the White Cold herself, Avallac'h states that only the Child of the Elder Blood, the baby fathered by The Elder God, can do this.

He states that Ciri barely has any of the power Lara had, and that he is a thousand times more powerful then Lara, that there is nothing more powerful then himself, and even he couldn't stop the White Cold.

Avallac'h tells Ciri that he is The Elder God and only a child he fathers can stop the White Cold and save life.

When Ciri suggests she have Avallac'h's baby, he tells her, she has only rudimentary traces of Elder Blood, that her powers are weak, and a baby she produced with him would not be strong enough, as the Elder Blood powers strengthen with each generation. No, she has to have a baby with Auberon, and the baby would be a new Lara and will grow up and have Avallac'h's baby. 

Ciri asks once again, if Avallac'h will really keep his promise and give her, her freedom, and send her home if she gives him a baby. 

Avallac'h repeats what he said weeks earlier, that he would like Ciri to live with him and raise the baby together, even if he's not it's father, he still wants Ciri and the baby to live with him and be his family, just as he would have taken care of Lara and her baby with Creaggon had she come back to him, and that he hoped by the time the baby was born, Ciri would have learned to love him and not want to leave, or at least after spending 9 months with her unborn baby, would love the baby and not want to leave it, so stay and help him raise it, but that he will take her back to Geralt and Yennefer if that's what she still wants after the baby is born.

While Avallac'h wants Ciri and the baby to replace his dead Lara and her baby, alongside preaching ancient prophecies of an Elder Blood Child that will be the saviour of Elves and Humans alike, Auberon, couldn't care less about Ciri or saving the world from the White Cold and wants the baby to use as a weapon to slaughter all humans.

Ciri starts to suspect Avallac'h has underestimated her powers, and begins trying to mentally withhold information from him to see if she can prevent The Knowing One from knowing her every thought.... as Ciri begins plotting against Avallac'h.

By this point Ciri has lived with Avallac'h for many months, and because of the way time moves here, Ciri can not tell if the passage of time has been days or years. But she has realized a few things: 

* 1: While Avallac'h and Auberon both want a baby from her, their goals differ and Avallac'h is the one who actually wants the baby. 

* 2: Avallac'h has never been allowed to live a normal life and desperately wants to have a family and a normal life like everyone else. Having Elder Blood himself, Avallac'h is not interested in gaining powers. He just wants to be normal, have a normal life, and have a normal family. Because of his life-long isolation from normal society, being imprisoned so long as a breeder, he has no clue how to interact normally with others or how to go about finding either friends to talk to or a family to love.

* 3: Auberon wants a weapon, and Avallac'h says he wants to save the world, but he can't hide the fact that deep down he wants a family. Ciri concludes that while Auberon isn't evil, he certainly would never love the baby, while Avallac'h obviously would both love it and at least try to be a good father to it, even if he has no clue how a father should act.

* 4: Ciri decides that Auberon should not be allowed to have the baby, because he is too power hungry and would never love the child.

* 5: Ciri makes up her mind that one way or another she must give Avallac'h a baby, because she is certain that he will keep his promise and send her home once he has a baby to be his family. 

* 6: Auberon hates humans and will never fuck one, so he never intends to get Ciri pregnant, meaning she can never give Avallac'h the baby he wants and she'll never be free. 

* 7: Avallac'h is highly attracted to Ciri because she looks like Lara and would have fucked her himself, had the unicorns and Eredin not interrupted them that day on the lake.

* 8: And the only thing stopping Avallac'h from fucking her now, is he won't disobey Auberon.

* 9: Auberon is obviously taking great sadistic delight and sexually tormenting and cuckolding Avallac'h, and that seems to be his primary goal more than anything else.

* 10: It occurs to Ciri that Auberon was Lara's father, and Auberon apparently was not fully in approval of his daughter being breed by Avallac'h, resulting in this current situation of Auberon calling Ciri "Lara" and then using her to cuckold Avallac'h.

* 11: Ciri comes to the conclusion Auberon would not let Avallac'h have the baby, if he (Auberon) was the father; but also concludes that if Avallac'h fathers the baby, Auberon will want nothing to do with keeping the baby and let Avallac'h keep it.

* 12: Ciri is fed up with the elves fighting over her. She just wants to go home to mummy Yennefer and if she ever wants to see mummy again, she has to get pregnant with Avallac'h's baby, to hell with Auberon's permission.

Ciri, desperate to get off the planet and go home, comes to the conclusion the only way she''s getting out of here is if Avallac'h gets her pregnant himself, but he won't do that willingly without Auberon's permission and Auberon has already said no, meaning the only way she's going to get pregnant is if she rapes Avallac'h, but him being The Knowing One, that could never happen, because he knows everything before it happens and he would stop her.

And so Ciri decides that her only way to get home, is if she rapes Avallac'h to get pregnant by him, without his breaking his promise to King Auberon.

Then she can give Avallac'h a baby, Avallac'h will take her home, and the king won't be able to punish Avallac'h for fucking her, because he won't have done it willingly.

Thus Ciri, deviant little mastermind that she is, trains her mind to block Avallac'h's ability to see/hear her thoughts, so that she can sneak up him and rape him.

The days and nights continue as before... Ciri spending the day with Avallac'h, growing ever closer to her elderly Elven friend, and her nights spent with Auberon, growing ever more frustrated with his refusal to have sex with her.

The consistency of these nights with Auberon and days with Avallac'h are broken up suddenly by an out of place scene dropped in between them...

###Avallac'h returns Ciri back to the palace and the reader is greeted with a seemingly out of place, off topic scene as Avallac'h and Ciri head to the stable and see one of the stable boys beating Avallac'h's horse.

This seemingly unimportant and starkly out of place, off topic scene, spans 2 sentences and is easy to miss, but the mindful reader will remember too that earlier, a sentence had mentioned some servants went missing... and the very observant reader will also remember that 200 years ago: 

###Lara Dorren and her lover Creaggan of Lod vanished from the universe without a trace, leaving people to spin wild rumors that the couple were killed by an angry mob.... leaving The Great Avallac'h the only witness of Lara's death. But he was so upset over her death that he too vanished and was not seen again, until his sudden return to Tir ni Lia with Ciri 200 years later...

The nights with Auberon and days with Avallac'h continue, and then...

Ciri walking through the garden a few days later over hears some she-elf ladies of the court, commenting on the stable hands going missing.

The nights with Auberon and days with Avallac'h continue some more, and then...

The statues of the serpent are all over the palace by this point, including Auberon now has one in his bedroom.

Ciri notes that this serpent is identical to the large pendant that hangs from Avallac'h's neck, a pendent he won't let anyone, not even Ciri touch.

Ciri asks Auberon what the snake statue is, and is stunned to hear Auberon sat it is Avallac'h's true form. 

Confused, Ciri asks for an explanation and Auberon tells her to pay attention to the mirrors, noting that Avallac'h has hundreds of mirrors in his house, and has been putting mirrors all over King Auberon's palace.

He called Avallac'h "The Man of Glass" and "Master Mirror" then tells Ciri WHY he'll never let her give Avallac'h a baby...

According to King Auberon, Avallac'h is TIME. He is the creator of life, the destroyer of life, he is the beginning of all life and the end. Time starts and end with him. He walks through time and space via mirrors carefully placed everywhere. He pulls people through time with him and leaves them lost forever. A trickster demon, and a god of chaos, he cause the Conjunction of Spheres and capturing and trapping the Elder God was no easy feat.

Avallac'h does not look like the other elves, because he is not an elf. No one knows what he is, but he started cloning himself to create more beings like him so to not be alone... in doing so he created Auberon, then Lara. Lar had to be destroyed, no more Elder Bloods must be born. The Elder God must be stopped from creating more of them, and THAT is why Ciri must never have a baby.

Auberon tells Ciri she is the last living elder Blood, and when she dies, The Elder God will at last be defeated, for he is too old, too weak, his health failing too fast, it took him 700 years to clone himself to create Lara, he will not live long enough to create another Lara...

Ciri must NEVER have a baby, and as long as she lives, there is too great a risk of Avallac'h getting a baby from her.

Auberon tosses the fisstech Avallac'h gave him aside to show Ciri the mirror Avallac'h gave him. It shows you the truth Avallac'h does want you to see.

A scarab beetle in the game, Avallac'h's pendent was a serpent in the novels.

While is doesn't seem to do anything in the game, as the game never mentions it... in the novels, the pendent holds Avallac'h's body in the living flesh form that he usually appears in.

Without the pendet Avallac'h appears in his true undead form.

Avallac'h is dead and is a wraith. The type of wraith he is not said, though through he is described as a Luberkin and a Lich, and therefore is an immortal guardian specter who protects anyone with his bloodline lineage.

Though immortal, his flesh form can be injured or killed. He takes the same damage as he did while alive, can become sick, weak, or tired, and is no different then any other living being.

However, being a lich, means after his body is destroyed (killed) he can be resurrected again, if one finds the phylactery that contains the spell holding him alive.

This is how Geralt was able to resurrect Avallac'h once again during the Ugly Baby quest.

The Aen Elle have captured The Master of Mirrors, The Great Avallac'h, the Elder God that controls time and travels through mirrors and brings chaos and destruction wherever he goes.

The first of the Elder Bloods, from whom all Elder Blood flows... and they've used a powerful serpent pendant, hung round his neck, to bind his powers and trap him here on Tir Na Lia... 

The unicorns outside... this is THEIR world.. and the unicorns built this planet as a prison. 

Tir na Lia is prison. Avallac'h's prison.

The entire planet is a prison, built to contain the Elder God and stop him from creating more Elder Blood clones of himself.

The unicorns are the prison guards, and the attack Ciri witnessed... Avallac'h had shut down their barriers and was trying to escape off the planet with Ciri.

Ciri witnessed how dangerous The Knowing One was... he sliced through the unicorns' army like they were nothing, then when he was too weak to fight anymore, he turned on his prison guards, the she-elves, and took control of their minds, using them to kill even more unicorns.

Conflicted, Ciri feels Avallac'h is the only one she can trust, and becomes scared of Auberon. "We are all prisoners here." He tells her. We helped Avallac'h. He was our leader. He commanded armies, her personally killed millions, he used unicorn blood to power his spells, and took control of unicorn minds to force them into slavery. But the unicorns fought back against Avallac'h, gained control, and now he is trapped here and desperately trying to escape.

Whoever controls the pendant... controls The Elder God.

The unicorns used to have control of it, but now Auberon does. Like a genie in a bottle, Avallac'h is trapped so long as he wears the pendant, and must obey his master, the one who knows how to control the pendant.

Auberon now controls the pendant and Avallac'h is fight desperately against him now, trying to break free of Auberon's command. Auberon tells Ciri, Avallac'h wants Ciri, for more than a baby, he wants her to love him, so he can trick her... being an Elder Blood, she has enough power to remove the pendant from him... free him... or control him, like Auberon does... and neither must happen.

We now learn that Eredin is NOT evil... but one of the prison guards assigned to keep Avallac'h from escaping the planet... and the ironic twist of the game is the fact that if you didn't read the novel first... you defeat Eredin, believing him evil... not realizing that Ciri gained control of Avallac'h's pendent and escaped the planet, dragging Avallac'h with her... and the LYING OUT HER ASS EVERY STEP OF THE GAME, telling people how Eredin was trying to hurt her to use her powers... 

...but people who read the novels, know that Ciri herself is a psychotic mastermind supervillain, now wielding the power of an ancient Elder God, whom she broke out of a prison planet... and Eredin, one of those prison guards is desperately trying to recapture Avallac'h, while now also trying to capture Ciri and stop her before she uses Avallac'h to destroy everything.

In the game... Avallac'h helps Geralt defeat Eredin, then helps Ciri defeat the White Frost... and then... returns in the Hearts of Stone dlc... free of the pendent that bound him in the main game, and now using the name Gaunter O'Dimm, once again using his infamous mirrors and spoons to control time... Avallac'h is either freed forever or defeated for a time, threatening to soon return to Geralt's life again... and he does... when he appears in the Blood and Wine dlc in what is said to be his original true form: that of The Unseen Elder.

But... back to the novels and Auberon telling Ciri this is the Unicorn's prison planet and Avallac'h is the greatest evil in the universe, trapped here and wanting a baby from Ciri because he wants to trick Ciri into falling in love with him to help him escape.

Ciri refuses to believe what Auberon tells her and runs to Avallac'h to ask him if this is true. Avallac'h only smiles and says "We can not speak of ourself here. The walls have ears and hear all that we say."

*(NOTE: Avallac'h uses plural third person when speaking of himself: he says "We" and "Us" instead of "Me" and "I")*

Finally comes the night Auberon shows Ciri what is in Avallac'h's magic mirror: Geralt murdered, and tells Ciri the only way she's getting out of here alive is if she gives the Aen Elle the baby Lara was intended to have, but as he's the one to do it and he'll never fuck a human, she's trapped here forever.

The fight between Ciri and Auberon escalated out of control, and finally enraged Ciri storms out of the King's bedroom, to the palace garden...

###where she finds Avallac'h setting up new statues of life-like humans, that look eerily like the stable hands that went missing earlier that week.

Intending to talk to Avallac'h, Ciri is stunned to see that one of these statues is of the stable boy who she had witnessed beating Avallac'h's horse.

As Ciri stares at the statue, the words:

"This is a very dangerous elf" 

go through her mind as, she now understands:

that this isn't a statue of the missing boy... it IS the missing boy...

.... and Avallac'h has been killing people to make the statues in his garden, in his palace, around the city, in the king's palace... hundreds of statues. Thousands of statues. Mostly humans. Ciri wonders, how many people has Avallac'h killed by turning them into statues. 

And Avallac'h's darker side, grows even darker as the reader is reminded of the scene in the previous novel, of the statue of Lara and Creaggon in Avallac'h's hideout... a stature, he claims he made... of Lara and Creaggon, locked forever in graphically lewd sexual embrace...

... and the truth of Lara's death, becomes starkly clear, as Ciri starts to realize there never was an angry mob... Avallac'h killed Lara and Creaggon himself... possibly not meaning too... when he caught them in bed together and lost his temper...

Ciri now wants to leave the planet more then ever... as she begins to fear Avallac'h, realizing that he is not the kind, loving person she had thought he was, but was rather a murderer, whom was routinely killing off humans.

Uncertain what to do, Ciri approach's Avallac'h and startles him, because he did not hear her approach, nor had he heard her thoughts. He assumed she was still with Auberon, and found himself baffled to learn that she had left Auberon and come to the garden, without him, The Knowing One, knowing it.

Avallac'h finds himself confused, as he thought he was alone, and Ciri had snuck up on him.

No one can sneak up on The Knowing One. He knows everything. 

Sees everything. 

Hears everything. 

No one can hide their thoughts from him.

No one can hide their dreams from him.

No one... but Lara. 

His beloved wife, Lara was able to hide her thoughts from him. 

Lara taught herself how to hide her thoughts from Avallac'h, so she could sneak off with Creaggon and cheat on her husband.

With Avallac'h now comparing Ciri to Lara even more, his thoughts turn bloody, as he grows paranoid over why Ciri would be doing what Laa did : hiding her thoughts from him.

Avallac'h starts rambling gibberish about Lara cheating on him, as his rage over Lara's affair with Creaggan, flares with him telling Ciri she's acting too much lie Lara.

Avallac'h bipolar nature shows up again with him switching quickly back and forth between calling Lara a innocent saint and a cheating whore.... then accusing Ciri of tainting his memory of Lara, by acting like Creaggan.

Avallac'h truely, deeply loved Lara and that she cheated on him with Creaggan, left him emotionally scarred and still not yet recovered.

The reader sees very clearly that Avallac'h has very little mental or emotional stability, and his severe lack of social skills is showing again, with him completely unable to know how to deal with being in a situation where someone surprises him with something he did not know about.

We now learn that because he is The Knowing One, Avallac'h has always relied on his ability to know everything going on inside everyone's head, and has no experience at reacting to being like a normal person without the ability to see and hear everyone's' thoughts. 

Avallac'h now reveals himself to absolutely terrified of the unknown, to the point that he feels deeply threatened by anything he doesn't know, and reacts viciously   and violently to it, terrified that the reason it's unknown is because it wants to hurt him.

Up to this point we have seen that Avallac'h is excessively emotional, and has almost no control of his emotions at all... but we have not yet seen him terrorized to the point of reacting with pure mindless terror induced violence.... which is what we are watching unfold in this scene now, as he has a complete lose of composure and devolves into a hysterical, screaming, yelling, total meltdown, in what can only be described as a horrifying PTSD panic attack.

Only Lara rivaled Avallac'h in his powers. Only Lara could hide her thoughts.... now Ciri has snuck up on him. Him not detecting her thoughts. Him not knowing she was thinking to come to the garden. Avallac'h now knows, he has underestimated Ciri's powers and she truely does have Lara's abilities.... but like Lara, she's using them against him.

Frightened Avallac'h realizes what Ciri has been doing - blocking him from knowing her thoughts, and he now feels scared, confused, and threatened, uncertain as to why Ciri would want to hide her thoughts from him.

Avallac'h trusted Ciri and thought she trusted him. That she would want to hide things from him, meant she did not trust him and was plotting against him.

And Ciri doesn't realize how scared out of his mind Avallac'h is right now because of her ability to sneak up him.

Ciri is proved in this scene, to be an absolutely childish, idiot, who while smart in some things, is boarding on overly stupid retardness in this scene, as she continues to move in on Avallac'h, literally backing him into a corner, while he's visibly terrified out of his mind, having a total terror stricken meltdown, fast becoming a rabid wolverine ready to tear everything around him apart, and **Ciri is TOO STUPID TO NOTICE** she's got him so scared, that he's about 10 second from tearing her head off with his bare hands.

She's got him backed into a corner, as he's frantically looks around the enclosed walled in garden, realizing he's no where's near the nearest door and desperately wants to run away right now.

Avallac'h tries reading her mnd to find out what she is hiding, why she went to the trouble to sneak up on him while hiding her thoughts from him, and he can see nothing.

Ciri has now done something NO ONE but Lara (and unknown to Avallac'h also Auberon) has ever been able to do before: put up a barrier around their own thoughts and prevent Avallac'h from knowing what they are thinking.

While Avallac'h is fast going into a massive panic attack, Ciri is still in a raging fit of fury over the picture of a murdered Geralt, that Auberon had just shown her, and lunges at Avallac'h, screaming and yelling, says she's had it with Auberon and his refusal to fuck her, demands Avallac'h give Auberon a whore to lust after so he'll fuck Ciri while lusting after the whore.

Stunned, Avallac'h tells Ciri she's being irrational. Ciri has a total meltdown, starts hitting Avallac'h, and Avallac'h tells her if she doesn't calm down, he'll turn her into one of these statues along with that unruly stable hand that was harassing his horses earlier this week.

And if the reader remembers the OTHER two statues Avallac'h has - the ones in his bedroom - of Lara and Creaggon... that sex doll statue of Lara that Avallac'h openly admitted he had sex with, quite regularly... 

...the reader suddenly now realizes that the statue of Lara is not JUST a statue, but actually IS Lara, and that all those people that keep going missing are now these statues.

Keeping in mind too, that the elves, claimed to worship a serpent, calling Avallac'h an Elder God and stating that the serpent pendant he wore was holding him in his elf form. 

The reader now starts to realize that Avallac'h is some sort of ancient serpent transformed to look like an elf, has Gorgon like abilities, and can turn people into stone.... we now have reason to question... HOW exactly did Lara REALLY die, and WHY  are the statues of Lara and Creaggon, clearly made in such a way to appear the two statues were having sex with each other.... 

(Geralt DID in fact ask these questions to Avallac'h, back in the cave during the Purple Bison scene.)

These statues, heavily imply that Avallac'h caught Lara and Creaggon together and killed them himself, by turning them into stone, something that we now know he is able to do.

Seeing Ciri running to the garden, (and look for this garden in the game, when you get to Ge'els palace - the game devs put it in the game to horrify anyone who read the novels and knew what happened there on page 179 of Lady of the Lake) and now hearing her yelling... other Elves start to gather in the garden, wondering what the commotion is.

Avallac'h, always able to remain calm, because he knows everything ahead of time and is able to calculate his words and actions, now finds himself, uncertain of how to respond to the situation he's found himself in, and he too his yelling, something no one has ever seen happen before... he is mute, or at least everyone thought he was. He hasn't said a word in centuries, using telepathy to communicate with everyone by placing his thoughts in their heads...

...the fact that he's using his voice to speak, has got everyone's attention. 

As no one has ever seen calm, quiet, docile Avallac'h lose his temper like this before, dozens of elves from the royal court begin to gather in the garden to watch as Ciri and Avallac'h have a shouting match at each other.

While the crowd around them continues to grow, and now includes Eredin, Ciri and Avallac'h are soon reduced to a fist fight, with Ciri viciously attacking, punching, hitting, and kicking Avallac'h and Avallac'h trying to hold her off, while still yelling at her.

Avallac'h is completely taken off guard by this attack and is too shocked by the fact that he didn't see it coming to be able to fully process what is happening. Seeing the crowd, he shoves Ciri aside and runs from the garden, but doesn't get far before Ciri tackles him to the ground, and begins tearing his clothes off while screaming he's going to make her pregnant, right here and now.

Ciri rapes Avallac'h in front of a rather large crowd, and Avallac'h at first too stunned by the realization that Ciri has powers as great as his own, to fully be aware of what Ciri is doing to him.

It has been centuries since anyone has been able to attack Avallac'h. His ability to see thoughts, left him able to foil every plan everyone has ever plotted against him, and he's now realizing he's pushed Ciri too far. 

Now reminded that he learned to control his own powers after being kidnapped and tortured, training himself to control his powers as a means to escape, he's now horrified to see that he's become the very thing he fought against... he's forced Ciri's hand by trapping her, and desperate to escape him, she set out to train herself to be able to defeat him... something Avallac'h had not anticipated happening.

Physically stronger then Ciri, Avallac'h pushes her off on him and once again tries to run from the garden, only to be tackled to the ground and raped by Ciri, yet again.

He escapes again, and again she drags him back to the ground, but now she changes her battle cries, and begins shouting at him:

"You're the one who wants the baby, not Auberon, you should be the one sacrificing yourself to me. You said I have Lara's eyes, you ought want me. I can be Lara for you."

The mention of Lara's name, snaps Avallac'h out of his dazed shock, as he suddenly clamps his hands around Ciri's throat, strangling her, while screaming hysterically that she's not Lara child, but rather Creaggon's child.

Remembering his attempted attack on Eredin, Ciri suddenly realizes, too late, that Avallac'h has a vicious side. Terrified, Ciri realises that this is a very, very, VERY dangerous elf and he's about to kill her.

Quickly she tries to get away from him, but he's now flipped her around and is on top of her, punching her teeth out, while hysterically calling her Creaggon and saying he'll kill her for taking Lara from him, while slamming her head onto the ground over and over again.

Dozens of Elves have now gathered in the garden, watching this scene unfold, but none of them tries to stop Avallac'h as he goes out of his mind beating Ciri to a bloody pulp.

Ciri realizing that Avallac'h has lost total control of his senses and his ability to recognize who she is, and has mistaken her for Creaggan of Lod, begins trying to calm him down, trying to convince him that she's Ciri not Creaggan.

When Avallac'h snaps out of his fit and realizes he's nearly beaten Ciri to death. Horrified by what he's done, Avallac'h quickly lets go of Ciri and runs from the garden in tears.

Ciri does not chase him this time, instead calls out to him, asking him to not run from her, and he stops and waits for her to join him. We now see Avallac'h in shock and trembling, still not fully able to process what has happened.

The Fisher King

Both of them now in tears, Ciri asks Avallac'h to forgive her, and please try to forget what she did to him, asking him to not tell anyone. (A rather pointless request considering dozens of people just witnessed this event.) 

Avallac'h agrees to Ciri's request and this is followed by the only sex scene in the series that features Ciri, as Avallac'h pulls her back down to the ground, and neither of them seem to care that everyone in the town is watching them, as they are both too shocked and hurt for either to be fully aware of their surroundings. 

And this sex scene fades to black, so you don't get an detail about what happens.

This is also the last time anyone sees Avallac'h go out in public. After the rape, Avallac'h takes to wearing a mask and a hooded cloak and starts only going outside at night, then moves out of his palace to start living in caves and underground caverns instead. He becomes too humiliated to ever let anyone look at him again. 

Previously accused of being too overly emotional, Avallac'h never again shows any emotion at all. Shutting down completely. We never again see him laugh or smile, as extreme suicidal depression sweeps over him, with him becoming the cold, emotionless person we see in the game.

Sadly, Avallac'h is already dead... he is a wraith... he already killed himself when Lara died and the Avallac'h we see now is trapped in an eternity of trying to kill himself again and not being able to.

Avallac'h never returns to normal society after being raped, becoming a hermit, retreating forever from society. He stops talking, becoming mute completely, not even using telepathy to speak to anyone, totally shutting himself off from contact with anyone, and continues retreating deeper under the mountains in an attempt to not hear the thoughts of anyone ever again.

We saw the statue of Lara, the statue of Creaggon.... statues perfectly lifelike, and locked in sexual embrace.

Then we saw the empty garden... the servants vanishing... the garden statues that looked like the servants .... and then we saw Avallac'h putting up one of these statues and admitting that it was the stable hand that had beaten his horse, the same stable hand that had gone missing...

... and this admission, followed on the same page, by Avallac'h's rage over Lara and Creaggon...

... and at the same time... seeing that Ciri, like Lara, has the ability to hide her thoughts from Avallac'h....

All of this comes together to tell us, how Lara Dorren and Creaggon of Lod ACTUALLY died... remembering too, that Avallac'h was the only witness to their deaths.

The rape scene is a pivotal point in the series, because it tells us who killed Lara and how, and also shows us, for the first time, that Ciri actually DOES have magical abilities.

Knowing that Ciri has done what no one else could do and blocked her thoughts from Avallac'h, meaning that Ciri had powers equal too, or even great then the powers of The Knowing One, Eredin, now begins hatching plots of his own.

Ciri, not entirely certain of what she should do or how she should feel, now that she's had sex with Avallac'h, both by rapng him and then by his, more or less willingly fucking her afterwards, and seeing that Avallac'h is skittish and hiding from her now, decides to taker her horse and explore the city alone.

With Ciri alone, and not accompanied by Avallac'h for the first time since she arrived, Eredin sees his chance to get Ciri on his side.

Eredin seeing that Avallac'h is forcing Ciri on Auberon and preventing Auberon from getting anywhere with Ciri, and now that Ciri and Avallac'h have got a vast emotional wedge between them, corners Ciri the day following the rape of Avallac'h, in the very same garden and hands her a flask, stating if she wants to escape this madness, put this in the king's drink after Avallac'h gives the king his fisstech.

When Ciri asks what it is, Eredin explains that Auberon hates humans and will never fuck her, Avallac'h's the only one around here who wants Ciri, but he'll never disobey Auberon, so he won't fuck her either. Eredin said he'd fuck Ciri just so she could hurry up and have this stupid Elder Blood baby so they could get rid of her horrid human presence.

Eredin explains that Auberon won't let her go until she has a baby but he'll never fuck her and Avallac'h won't let her go even if she does have a baby. If she wants her freedom, the only way out is to kill the King and frame Avallac'h for it. The king will be dead, Avallac'h will be blamed and executed, and Eredin, good heart that he has, he will send Ciri back to Geralt and Yennefer himself.

Horrified. Ciri says Auberon and Avallac'h, though, not exactly good to her, have taken care of her, protected her, tried to be kind to her in their own way, and have not hurt her, Ciri admits that Avallac'h hitting her was her own fault for attacking him, and that Auberon was only abusive when high on fisstech, both were her friends when calm and not taking fisstech, neither would ever knowingly hurt her, and she'll not hurt them, she'll not kill one and blame it on the other, she'll find her own way off this planet.

Ciri runs off and encounters a unicorn, that tells her she's in grave danger because The Fox never keeps his human playthings long. The unicorn tells Ciri a horror story of Avallac'h's sadistic side and the fact that he is known for seducing humans, getting them to trust him, then brutally killing them. The unicorn says Avallac'h is not only the most powerful, but also the most evil and most deadly sorcerer of the entire universe. That this is why they (the unicorns) have trapped him here.

The unicorn tells her that The Fox (Avallac'h) and The Sparrow Hawk (Eredin) have long terrorized galaxies. That they are evil criminals, so evil that no human mind could even begin to imagine the atrocities they have committed.

The unicorn claims that the Aen Elle whom are trapped on this planet are here because they ate humans and had gone from planet to planet mass murdering humans for the food industry.

The unicorns made the claim that Avallac'h ran a breeding farm, that bred humans for food, and that Eredin was the butcher who slaughtered them.

That the elves saw humans, the same way humans saw cows: as beasts of burden to be herded, corralled, and slaughtered for steak.

The Fox was the worst of them, according to the unicorn, and this planet was turned into a prison, just to contain him alone. They compared Avallac'h with Vilgefortz, stating that by comparison, Vilgefortz was a good person, that not even Vilgefortz, evil as he was, came any where's close to being as evil as The Great Avallac'h.

That The Fox leads the Wild Hunt, kidnaps pregnant humans, harvests their babies for his experiments, then kills the women. The elf is older than time, existed before time began and will continue to exist after the end of the world. He has single handedly murdered, one at a time tens of thousands of humans.

Keep in mind here, that we were earlier told that the only people able to communicate with animals, are people who have never shed innocent blood, and that when Geralt first met Avallac'h, Avallac'h was surrounded bu tens of thousands of animals and monsters, all of whom were willing to die defending him, stating that their beloved Knowing One, had never touched a sword in his life, did not eat meat, and had never shed innocent blood.

Because of this fact in Witcher lore, Ciri continues to side with Avallac'h. 

Remember too, that other then his meltdown when Ciri raped him, we have NEVER seen Avallac'h do anything to try to hurt anyone and have seen him cide people for carrying weapons, and have seen him ranting over the evils of killing any life: animal, monster, elf, or human. We also know Avallac'h is not well liked by other elves, because he is a human rights activist who believes the radical theory that humans are quite possibly sentient beings.

So far, we know Avallac'g "is evil" because Auberon (while high on fisstech) spun a while tale of serpents, time, and mirrors... and Ciri did not believe a word of what Auberon told her, either.

And now Ciri has encountered a unicorn and is once again being told that this is a very evil, very dangerous elf and that Ciri needs to watch her back around him, because of his history of being a spy and assassin. But unlike Auberon, the unicorn has some chilling evidence to back up his story. 

Ciri refuses to believe Avallac'h is evil, stating that he has been nothing but kind and loving to her, in fact he's the only true friend she's ever had in her entire life. The unicorn takes Ciri to Avallac'h's lab and shows her the gruesome remains of bodies. A massive boneyard of tens of thousands of human skeletons.

Horrified, Ciri runs away from the unicorn, not knowing what to believe. She notes that the bones are buries and very old... that the lab was built on top of them, and the bones are only surfaces because a landslide washed out the side of the mountain.

Thus these bones are part of ancient ruins. Ciri concludes that the bones are too old for Avallac'h to have killed them, but decides to ask Avallac'h about the bones, the lab, and what the unicorn said.

Ciri knows that mages are bound by a vow they took. Each mage taken on a different vow, and that vow can never be broken else the mage will lose his or her powers. Ciri also knows that Avallac'h is bound to magic by a vow of honesty and that he will never tell a lie. She can always rely on him to tell the truth and she has learned that when asked point blank, Avallac'h will never deny anything he has ever done. If he did kill the humans, he'll tell her and she'll find out why.

Remember too though... this scene is happening about 8 hours after Ciri had raped Avallac'h and he's still shaken up and in shock.

Ciri heads to Avallac'h's room in the King's palace, but find him so terrified of her that he runs away, locks the door and won't let her near him. In spite of the fact that they've quite literally kissed and made up, and fucked each other willingly, Avallac'h is still traumatized by the fact that Ciri premeditated and plotted out, raping him, without his knowing she was plotting to do so, and he's terrified of her, because no one as ever been able to sneak anything past him before. (No, the sex part of the rape isn't the part that traumatized him.)

Wondering what to do while she waits for Avallac'h to calm down enough to stop being terrified of her, Ciri remembers what Eredin had said just before she encountered the unicorn.

Ciri runs to King Auberon to tell him Eredin was plotting to kill him, but arrives as Eredin is leaving the room. Horrified Ciri runs past Eredin to Auberon and finds the king dying.

Ciri stays with Auberon, for several hours, too in shock to react to the king's death. Uncertain what to do, she decides to tell Avallac'h that Eredin has murdered Auberon, and is suddenly struck with the realization of what is happening. Terror seizes Ciri as she remembers Eredin planned to kill Avallac'h as well and she's not seen him in hours.

With Auberon dead, panicked Ciri runs from the room to find Avallac'h knowing Eredin planned to kill him to. Eredin, waiting for Ciri to leave the king's bedroom, starts yelling the king is dead, pointing the finger of murder to Ciri, saying Avallac'h put her up to it.

Ciri runs to Avallac'h and finds he's already fled.

Not knowing where else to look for him, Ciri heads for Avallac'h's boat on the river, as chaos descends upon the city, as news of the king's murder spreads like wildfire and everyone rises up to stop Ciri's escape from the city.

Ciri makes it to the boat, only to remember it has no oars and can only be moved by Avallac'h's magic flute. Cornered, Ciri draws her sword to fight as Eredin boards the boat. 

The fight against Eredin barely starts, when the boat takes off, sending Eredin into the water, and suddenly Avallac'h's massive city encompassing barrier becomes visible as it shatters and shuts down. allowing the boat to fly out of the city.

As soon as the barrier goes down, a herd of unicorns appear and grab Ciri, and fly off the planet into outer space. 

The last thing Ciri sees of the Aen Elle Elves, Avallac'h casts a mega sized barrier around the entire planet, stopping anyone else from leaving to catch Ciri, then casts White Frost inside of the barrier, burying the planet in a blizzard instantly killing every last Aen Elle Elf on the planet... thus how the Wild Hunt became the undead Frost Wraiths you see in the games.

Ciri escapes from Avallac'h and the rest of the novel continues on, with Ciri and Geralt as they go up against Vilgefortz.

Several more chapters later, we reach the end of the novel series...

At the end of the novel series Geralt and Yennefer have both been killed in a riot in the non-human district, killed by a boy with a pitchfork. Ciri witnessed this, and with the help of the same Starry Eyed Unicorn who helped her escape from Avallac'h earlier, Ciri takes their bodies to the Isle of Avallac'h on the Lake of Avalon...

Knowing that Avallac'h is a genetic scientist and uses his Elder Blood powers to regenerate flesh and heal people (thus how he healed Ciri's face), Ciri asks Avallac'h to restore life back to Geralt and Yennefer, saying that in exchange for this, she will stay with him here, be his family, replace his Lara, give him a baby, as he had originally wanted... adding that she's still in love with Mistel and would have liked Mistel back as well.

Ciri and Avallac'h with The Fisher King

In resurrecting Geralt and Yennefer, Avallac'h also transforms himself and Ciri so that no one who was after them will recognize them, thus how Ciri is transformed into the Fairy Goddess known as The Lady of the Lake and Avallac'h is transformed into the Fisher King/the Old Hermit who protects her.

And while Ciri lives with Avallac'h on the lake, she never forgets Mistel, and Avallac'h let's Ciri do as she pleases, which includes letting her have other lovers... the very last scene of the series is a conversation between Ciri and Sir Galahad, with Ciri promising to have sex with the knight, if he takes him with her on his adventure to kill a dragon.

And near as I can tell, most of the hate that gets sent to Avallac'h by Ciri fans, is intended toward Auberon, but people get the two mixed up because of the similarity of their names and them both having baby obsessions with Ciri.

So, yeah... by the time I got to Lady of the Lake and Auberon and Avallac'h's involvement with what Auberon did to Ciri.... I... really didn't care, that much about Ciri, seeing how she is a whinny, annoying, self-centered brat who spent the bulk of her time with Avallac'h beating the crap out of him for no reason.

...and then when Ciri raped Avallac'h on page 179, instead of screaming Avallac'h deserved it, like Ciri fans do, I sided with Avallac'h.

People get mad, because of the scene when he strangles Ciri, while punching her in the face and knocking her teeth out... but he does this the 4th time she rapes him, because it's the only way he can get her to stop.

I'm sorry, but he had every right to defend himself against a rapist.

It is during the rape scene that we see Avallac'h's sadistic side unleashed, and Ciri become terrified of him, citing that she had not realized how immensely strong he was, until he had his hands around her throat strangling her.

Ciri stated that Avallac'h's attack was different then one lashing out at random, and she'd no doubt he was an expert at killing people by strangling them, due to the precision and manner of which he went at her throat, leaving her instantly unable to defend herself.

A unicorn later confirms this, stating that due to events of his childhood, Avallac'h had a deep hatred of Humans and had personally killed thousands of them, and unlike other Elves who killed many Humans swifty and without thought, Avallac'h was prone to seduce Humans to him, lure them into trusting him, then brutally torture them, killing them with his bare hands, only drawing a weapon after they were dead, to drive a sword down through their heads into their brain.

However we have only the unicorn's words for this and Ciri refuses to believe these words.

The unicorn told Ciri that not only was Avallac'h the most powerful sorcerer of all the known universe, he was also the most deadly, and most evil.

When Ciri states she does not believe this of Avallac'h, the unicorns take her to see his laboratory and show her a boneyard of tens of thousands of skeletons.

Ciri, horrified by the bones, refuses to believe they are human remains, until the unicorn shows her Avallac'h's trophies.... tens of thousands of human heads, with blade wound driven through the top of each one's skull.

The unicorn tells Ciri she's stuck in a dream that Avallac'h has created and she needs to open her eyes and look around at the reality of who he is and what he's doing to her.

Because Ciri described Avallac'h's world in terms of candy, stating the buildings look like candy, Avallac'h's boat is made of ribbon candy, trees made out of spun candy, and everything being prink shades of pink and purple, along with the odd broken up way the entire Chapter 5 is written, many readers speculate that the events of Chapter 5 (when Ciri is living with Avallac'h) may in fact be nothing but a drug-induced dream, that Avallac'h created via a spell and put in Ciri's head.

This is speculated partly due to the severity of Ciri's injuries, the fact that she was shown taking fisstech, and the fact that the fist thing Ciri sees upon meeting Avallac'h, is him using his flute to cast a spell.

Many readers speculate the attacks by unicorns were the unicorns breaking through Avallac'h's dream state barrier trying to bring Ciri back to the realm of the living, while Eredin's attacks, were him trying to get through Avallac'h's dream state barrier to get Ciri away from him.

It is unclear how much of what occurs in Chapter 5 of Lady of the Lake, is real versus something Avallac'h put in Ciri's head while trying to heal her injuries. 

Ciri keeps waking up to lucid moments, then drifting off again to pink candy strangeness.

It is clear that Avallac'h is giving Ciri fisstech and casting spells on her, but what events are really happening verses what is something Avallac'h is putting in her head, is unclear.

While much of the events in chapter 5 are muddled and unclear (written that way on purpose so the readers could see the world as Ciri was seeing it while she was high on fisstech), the fact that are clear are that: 

* Ciri was mortally wounded by Vilgefortz and rescued by Avallac'h

* Avallac'h was keeping Ciri high on fisstech to help her not feel her wounds while she was recovering

* Avallac'h was seducing Ciri, intent on getting a baby from her, and was taking advantage of the fact that Ciri was not fully aware of her surroundings while high on fisstech

* Avallac'h is a psion, a type of telepath, capable of seeing every thought, in everyone's head, and psychilly getting inside of someone's head to change their thoughts and dreams, making them think or dream, whatever he wants them to

* Ciri becomes lucid and more aware of her surroundings, every time Avallac'h is unconscious or in a weakened injured state

* The dream state ends abruptly, when Ciri succeeds in blocking her thoughts from Avallac'h, and is able to overpower him.

* Immediately following the rape scene, there is no more descriptions of a pink candy spun world, as Ciri starts looking around and seeing piles of bones, mutilated bodies, and severed heads.

* The unicorn TELLS Ciri that Avallac'h has trapped her in a dream and she needs to open her eyes and look at the reality of who Avallac'h is and what he's doing to her.

* EVERYONE - even Vilgisforzt - is terrified of Avallac'h, and calls him the evilest, most deadly sorcerer of the universe, stating that he caused the Conjunction of Spheres, created the Elder Blood Children, and is himself an ancient Elder God older then time, and capable of manipulating time, traveling from one world to the next with ease, and is dangerously insane due to eons of boredom.

Avallac'h's actions during this time period are also what cause most readers to hate him and refer to him as "the date rape guy" because he was keeping her drugged while trying to convince her to give him a baby. 

###Ironically, while he is referred to that way by Ciri fans, there was never a point when Avallac'h tries to rape Ciri, and it was Ciri who raped him.

I am always fascinated and horrified by the fans who call Ciri "a heroic strong woman whom girls should look up to for inspiration"...

...do these people realize they are LITERALLY telling little girls "hey, this woman is a rapist, go be like her, rape every man you see".

Ciri is a rapist.

And it wasn't some random "oh she was high on drugs and didn't know what she was doing" (an excuse I often hear Ciri fans say.)

No.. Ciri actively planned and plotted for SEVERAL WEEKS... she made an active choice to train her mind to try to control Avallac'h... spent weeks training herself in this... specifically with the goal in mind of raping him.

 Reality or dream, either way, Avallac'h's spell over Ciri breaks when she lashes out at him and rapes him, causing him to become terrified of her, allowing her to break free of his spell and return back to Geralt.

And than Ciri fans try to justify it by saying: "Well, he deserved it. Look at what he was doing. He deserved to be raped."

Uhm... no. No one deserves to be raped. It doesn't who they are or what they are doing... no one deserves to be raped.

What kind of a sick assed creep are you, if you can say "they deserved to be raped" about ANYONE?

Yes, he had a perverted mouth and talked about sex and babies constantly.

No, that's not a reason to rape him.

Yes, Avallac'h tried to seduce Ciri while keeping her drugged out of her mind.

But again... that's not a reason to rape someone.

And than some Ciri fans say: "Well, he would have raped her if she hadn't raped him first."

No. He wouldn't have. We saw him try to get her in bed, we saw him try to seduce her, and we saw her push him away, and he responded by backing off and never doing it again. Once she said "no" to him, he STOPPED trying to seduce her.

We saw him being cuckolded by Auberon, and being driven out of his mind because he wanted to fuck Ciri... and STILL not try to rape her.

We saw Ciri climb in bed with him and ASK HIM to fuck her... more than once... and each time saw him absolutely refuse to have sex with her, because Auberon had ordered him not to.

No... we have plenty of evidence that he wanted to fuck and WOULDN'T precisely because he REFUSED to rape anyone.

How Ciri fans can say: "Well, he would have raped her if she hadn't raped him first." is beyond me.

Than other Ciri fans start in with: "But he hurt her, he abused her, he hit her..."

No... he didn't. 

We see Ciri punching him, hitting him, kicking him, biting him, smashing his mirrors, destroying his antiques, and belittling him... in EVERY SCENE of them together. He never once even raises his voice to her.

The one time he does hit her... it was in self defence, because he he couldn't peacefully get her to stop raping him.

Let me ask you this... if you were being raped... wouldn't you fight back too?

But he also never hurt Ciri, he never even tried to, nor did he ever abuse her physically or sexually; he protected her from people who were trying to hurt her, he rescued her from Leo and nursed her back to health (saving her life because Geralt was too busy drinking with Regis ad Dandelion and fucking prostitutes to have time to be bothered rescuing Ciri just then and she would have died had it been left to Geralt to do anything.) . 

When Ciri made it clear she was a lesbian and only wanted Mistel, Avallac'h was perfectly content to live with her without having sex with her, seeing how he only wanted Lara.

Avallac'h tried to help her regrow her face, after Vilgefortz cut the flesh off of her face. He also mourned the loss of her face, because she looked identical to Lara. 

After Ciri's face is mutilated, Avallac'h becomes obsessed with Ciri's eyes, constantly telling her "you have Lara's eyes" and asking her to stay and live with him because he can not bare to go back living without Lara again.

It was Auberon, not Avallac'h who was daily abusing and molesting Ciri.

Avallac'h was kind and gentle with Ciri, always loving and protective of her.

It was Auberon who treated her like shit, abusing her, belittling her, and molesting her.

And it's very annoying to see Ciri fans accusing Avallac'h of doing the things Auberon did.

Likewise, it's just as annoying see Ciri fans say Avallac'h forced Ciri with Auberon, when that was clearly not the case, as seen in the scene with Eredin just after the unicorn attack.

But yeah, I was NOT a screaming fangirl of Avallac'h before reading the novels and it was reading the novels that resulted in my liking Avallac'h on the obsessive levels I do. 

Nearly everything that King Auberon did, gets falsely attributed to Avallac'h, which is understandable when you consider the similarity of their names and the fact that both of them are in so many scenes together.


It seems the many readers not only mixed up Avallac'h with Auberon, but that they also mixed up Avallac'h with Vilgefortz. Why this happens, I can not explain, because Vilgefortz and Avallac'h never appear in a scene together and their names are nothing alike.

I've heard many Avallac'h haters rant off a list of things Avallac'h did and NONE of them are things Avallac'h did, ALL of them  things Vilgefortz did.

The ONLY similarity between Vilgefortz and Avallac'h are they are both immensely powerful sorcerers, one an elf, the other a human, who are obsessed with getting a baby out of Ciri, and spent years doing experiments on young pregnant woman and their babies in their mad scientist labs. Beyond this though, nothing else about them is similar.

If you take what Avallac'h did on it's own, seperate from the rest of the novels, you are left with a guy, who overall, wasn't that bad and had 2 meltdowns when Ciri pushed him too far, and in both cases, had Ciri not been instigating the situation, he would not have reacted as he did.

If you take what Avallac'h did and compare it with what others did in the rest of the novels, you have a guy who is very tame, and is far more sane, less lewd, less violent, and no where's near as psychotic as the rest.

If you take how Avallac'h treated Ciri and compare it to the rest of the novels, and how other men treated her (INCLUDING Geralt, Dandelion, and Regis), Avallac'h is the one who treated her the LEAST shitty. Geralt was ten times more abusive of Ciri then Avallac'h was, and do you know HOW MANY 5 dozen is?

5 x 12 = 60

There are SIXTY men in the novels, who kidnap Ciri, and attempt to rape her, abuse her horrifically, and spend the bulk of their time cutting her with knives and burning her with hot pokers.

And, it is BECAUSE these other men had previously abused Ciri in this manner, that she ASSUMED she could get Avallac'h to do the same thing to her, BUT she had to needle him for weeks to get a reaction from him, because he was NOT prone to be abusive like the other men.

Ciri went out of her way to TRY to get Avallac'h to abuse her and because it was not in his nature to do so, she had herself a hissy fit and decided if he wasn't going to be a man and abuse her, then it was her job to abuse him so she raped him.

And then there is Vilgefortz...

Let me introduce you to Vilgefortz... 


Like Avallac'h and Auberon, and several others before them and after them, Vilgefortz ALSO wanted a baby from Ciri. He was a human sorcerer.... What he did, is one of the most graphically detailed torture porn sex scenes of any novel ever written, and involved hanging a nude Ciri in a gallows over his dinner table then giving his soldiers iron stove pokers to sexually abuse her with, in a gory, sex scene that lasts for 8 pages of orgasms from Ciri.

That scene, happens because Geralt decided he was sick and tired of dragging Ciri around with him, because she was nothing but an annoying, whinney, arrogant self-righteous, bullying, stuck up, selfish, self centered, spoiled brat princess next in line to be empress, used to having servants kiss her feet, and left Ciri alone, while he went off drinking with Regis and Dandelion at a local whore house.

Ciri in the novels is a bitchy, mega bitch mean girl who makes Yennefer look like a sweet, sainted angel. She's the type of girl who would order the execution of an entire city if she broke a nail while visiting it. Ciri is far from the sweet girl you see in the game. Because Ciri has this super-bitch personality in the novels (keeping in mind she's also only 12 years old in the novels) she is a difficult person for anyone to even remotely like, let alone love. And thus we see novel version of Geralt finds himself hating that he has to drag Ciri around with him everywhere.

Geralt awakes from his several days of drinking and fucking, to find Ciri is missing. Because Geralt doesn't give a shit about Ciri (the daddy + daughter relationship you see in the game DOES NOT exist in the novels) he goes about his business not concerned by the fact Ciri is missing 

NEWSFLASH: Geralt in the novels is a major douchebag dick. Be prepared to learn that when you read the novels, because he's quite different in the novels then he is in the game.

Regis and Dandelion and a few other guys who never appear in the game, so most people don't know them, are the ones worried about Ciri and finally convince Geralt to look for her, though he does it grudgingly and only to get Regis and Dandelion to stop pestering him.

And this is WHY Avallac'h suddenly enters the novels.

Do remember Avallac'h is one of the most minor characters of the novels, appearing on a grand total of 32 pages, from a series with 4,000+ pages.

The fact that Lara Dorren is insanely overpowered because she was born of the blood of an Elder God, is emphasized and over emphasized, throughout every chapter of the novels.

Lara become mythic, with people not believing her sorce story, because no one has ever seen this elusive underground dwelling god that rarely surfaces to set foot in daylight.

It reaches a point that no one, not ever Geralt, Yennefer, Ciri, or Regis believe such an ancient, Elder God Elf exists.

In Tower of Swallow, chaos desences fast on Geralt's life, as he watches everyone around him hacked and slashed to shreds, and him unable to save any of them.

Meanwhile on Skellige the same thing is happening to Ciri as Vilgefortz rises to power and the Rats (the gang Ciri belonged too) are cut down like rats.

The first 4 chapters of Tower of Swallows, build up death and blood shed on levels not before seen in the series, as the apocalypse clearly is breaking down on them.

Vilgefortz is out of control - a sorcerer, who is drawing on the powers of everything and everyone around him.... and the Druids are in a panic... because Vilgiforzts has gone to far and awoken a dark evil. He is now attempting to draw on the power of an Elder God.

Geralt receives a message to meet with the Druids, and he and Regis head to the swamps in search of a group of terrified Druids, who in a panic tell Geralt and Regis "He's back!"

Clearly terrified out of their minds, the Druids point to a cave that has appeared out of nowhere and tell Geralt "He summons you."

Avallac'h and his BabagaziAvallac'h and his Babagazi

Geralt turns to see what is clearly a portal, a large glowing blue cave, illuminated by crystal orbs hovering in the sky, as giant Echinops start sprouting out of the ground and surprisingly for Geralt start talking to him.

Enter the Babagazi...

Wave after wave of what can only be described as rabbit like blood thirsty Tribbles straight out of Star Trek, tens of thousands of them start rolling out of everywhere forcing Geralt into the cave.

Geralt enters the cave, expecting to be come face to face with some giant monstrous beast.

Instead, in the cave Geralt is greeted by a deceptively small and frail looking Elf, happily painting a purple bison and giant penises on cave paintings.

The Elf is mute and can not talk using his own voice, as all audible sounds from his mouth are nothing more then illegible bird chirps and high pitched whale songs. He uses telepathy to talk to Geralt, but the demonic elf's brain is too overpowered for Geralt and threatens to explode his brain... so the elf uses his Echinops and furry pumpkin rabbit beasts to speak for him.

Geralt is stuck trying to focus on one voice, with now hundreds of monsters all talking at once, obeying The Knowing One's command to speak in his stead.

Geralt tries to have a sensible conversation with the Elf, and instead has trouble getting the sex crazed Elf to talk about anything other then sex, penises, and the joys of fucking female humans.

Geralt is stunned and shocked to find everyone outside was so terrified of this clearly psychotically deranged Elf that is acting like a ill mannered child.

Geralt tells the Elf this and gets feces thrown at him, as the Elf laughs like a crazed lunatic and prances around the room reciting poetry about fucking.

Avallac'h and his BabagaziAvallac'h and his Babagazi

Geralt assumes the Elf to be a mage, given his feet are not touching the ground and the Elf is hovering on what seems to be clouds of light.

Further attempts to talk to the Elf, result in the Elf talking time to write poetry about ovulation and orgams, in between playing a flute and painting more penises on the wall and seemingly not listening to Geralt at all.

Geralt comes to the conclusion that this Elf is stark raving mad out of his mind bonkers and tries to leave only to find they are no longer in a cave, but rather a stone room with no doors or windows.

The crazy Elf becomes gravely serious and tells Geralt he's not leaving. He can't. He won't. Too much is at stake. When Geralt asks why, the Elf asks Geralt if he knows what Aen Searvenh means.

Geralt recits a legend about the Elder Blood and the ancient Elf god a create known as an Aen Searvenh from whom that blood comes.

The Elf asks where Ciri is, and Geralt admits he does not know, resulting in the Elf's rage as he tells Geralt that Vilgefortz has Ciri and it's all Geralt's fault.

And as already stated at the beginning of my answer to this question, the Elf is revealed to be Avallac'h and he gives Geralt the choice of save Ciri (who Geralt doesn't give a shit about and sees as a whinny, annoying brat) or save Dandelion (who is Geralt's favorite drinking buddy after Regis). 

Geralt chooses to abandon Ciri, leaving her to be tortured by Vilgefortz, while he goes to rescue Dandelion instead, thus WHY Avallac'h kidnaps Ciri... via rescuing her from Vilgefortz and takes her to his planet, then takes care of her until King Auberon forces him to turn her over to him instead.

Had Geralt not gone drinking with Regis and Dandelion, Vilgefortz would not have captured Ciri and Avallac'h never would have made an appearance in the books at all, because he ONLY shows up long enough to save Ciri from Vilgefortz and tend to her injuries afterwards.

In short, Avallac'h saved her life.

While Avallac'h is said to be evil, he's not a flat cookie cutter evil villain who is evil for evil's sake.

Avallac'h is a character who has watched the people he loves tortured and killed, one after another, ever since his childhood. 

Avallac'h was orphaned by Humans who tortured and murdered his family. A 10 year old boy, locked in a cage and forced to watch while his family was murdered in front of him. 

Captured and forced to watch his wife murdered.

And now he's watching his granddaughter being tortured and her adoptive father not doing shit about it.

He may be evil, but he cares about his family and Ciri is his family.

Vilgefortz is the primary villain of the novels, and has nearly as much on page time as Geralt himself does. He's in practically every chapter of every novel, and has one goal in mind: Getting a baby from Ciri and using it like a battery to power his own magic abilities. Better yet, let's turn Ciri into a baby producing factory, and fill all these glass jars with lots of Ciri's baby's and become powerful enough to take over every planet.

Vilgefortz is a megalomaniac hell bent on ruling the world.

Vilgefortz is the most feared person on Ciri's home planet.

Vilgefortz fears nothing... except for the elven Elder God whom created Lara Dorren, who is the only thing more powerful then Vilgefortz.

Nope, Ciri is no where's near as powerful as Vilgefortz, but she is the most powerful thing Vilgefortz's has ever encountered, and he's hell bent on hooking her up to his mad scientist lab equipment and feeding off her powers.... but why have just Ciri, when you can have lots of Ciri's babies powering this device instead.

Throughout the novels a grand total of 5 dozen men and women, kidnap Ciri, toss her in their bed, and sexually abuse her, because, hey, guess what - EVERYONE wants to get a baby out of her.

Of the 5 dozen characters to drag Ciri into their beds, Vilgefortz is the one who commits the worst, most horrific atrocities.

And while, yes, Avallac'h is one of the 5 dozen character trying to get a baby from Ciri, he's the ONLY one who isn't out to hurt Ciri, he's the only one who is kind and gentle with Ciri, he's the only one who actually loves Ciri and is willing to cast aside the baby goals content just to have Ciri as his companion.

Unlike Vilgefortz, Leo, and the rest, Avallac'h is not on a power trip. He already IS the most powerful being in all creation. He doesn't need more power. He doesn't even want the powers he already has. Like Ciri, Avallac'h was born with Elder Blood and is stuck with powers he didn't ask for. Like Ciri, he'd like to forget he was born with these abilities and be allowed to live a normal life. And he is saddened when he sees other using Ciri as a tool to fuel their own lusts for power.

Unlike Vilgefortz, Leo, and the rest, Avallac'h does not kidnap Ciri with the intent to harm her, but rather kidnaps her with the intent to protect her from  Vilgefortz and the 5 dozen others.

Unlike Vilgefortz, Leo, and the rest, Avallac'h takes care of Ciri. While the others injured her, leaving her mutilated, scarred, and faceless, Avallac'h tenderly cared for her injuries, and tried to heal the scars others had left on her.

In short.... people hate Avallac'h because he just plain had sex with Ciri by being raped by Ciri, and forgave her because he was in love with her, and you know the American mindset: guns, war, and violence are a okay, but sex is evil.

Ciri is kidnapped, tortured, and abused by 5 dozen characters, all of whom did horrific, unspeakable things to Ciri, yet, not one of them gets any hate from Ciri fans, while Avallac'h, who kidnaped Ciri to protect her from the bastards who were hurting her, gets hated on because he had sex with Ciri.

And THAT is the issue.

There are 5 dozen characters using, abusing, kidnaping, torturing, and severely injuring Ciri along her way through the 8 volumes of the series.

Evil men and women who brutalize Ciri on levels that are nearly impossible to imagine.

And then there is that one guy who had sex with her.

Do you hear Ciri fans chanting hate at the man who sliced her face from her skull?


Do you hear Ciri fans screaming hate at the guy who stuffed a hot poker up her vagina, while she was hanging over his dinner table in a gallows?


Ciri fans are a okay with what Vilgefortz did to her.

But, the guy who rescued her from Vilgefortz and tenderly cared for her horrifying injuries... yeah... hate on him, because he ends up having sex with Ciri.

Ciri fans are fine with Vilgefortz and the stuff he did to Ciri, because Vilgefortz never has sex with Ciri.

The ONLY reason Ciri fans hate Avallac'h is because he ruined their image of Ciri being their innocent virginal waifu.

And he didn't even have sex with her willingly. She raped him.

Yep... you read that right... people hate Avallac'h because Ciri raped him.

Typical American mindset for you, hate the rape victim, and praise the rapist, but yeah, there it is.

If you pay attention to the people who do the most hate mongering on Avallac'h - they are always Americans. Most European fans of the Witcher series, either like Avallac'h or say they never paid much attention to him at all because he was such a minor character. I've yet to encounter a non-American who had vehemently hate filled rage against Avallac'h. In EVERY case of encountering some one with fiery fury for Avallac'h, they are ALWAYS Americans.


Because American society has a twisted sense of logic. They glorify guns and vilify sex.

Beat the shit out of a woman, and no one gives a fuck. Wife beaters don't go to jail.

Have sex with a prostitute, watch yourself and the girl you had sex with both tossed in jail and slapped with huge fines.

American laws are backwards. Beating up your wife is a okay, having sex with someone is evil though.

Do you realize what kind of message that sends? Glorify the sick son of bitch who brutalizes a woman and hate the man who rescues that woman from said sick son of a bitch.

Glorify hate, condemn love. Yep. Go America. Keep on spreading the hate and killing everyone who would rather love than fight. Grab your guns, put on your white pillow cases, beat your women, and kill everyone who has sex. It's no wonder American families only have an average of 1.2 children, while families outside of America average 8 children, what with the way they run around waving guns in the air and screaming sex is evil.

I'm sorry, but I fail to understand why Americans love guns and violence so much and are so filled with hatred for and fear of sex and love. It just baffles me so much.

Vilgefortz can beat up Ciri left and right, lock her in cages and torture her, and Americans don't bat an eye. Who cares that he left her with no flesh on her face. Who cares that he mutilated her genitals and sliced up her ovaries. Who cares that she was tortured with in an inch of her life and mutilated so bad, the only way she could be recognized was looking at her eyes.

Avallac'h rescues Ciri from Vilgefortz, nurses her back to health, and has sex with her (because she raped him) and Americans are ready to stuff him full of pitchforks because of it.

I'm sorry if you think I should hate Avallac'h alongside everyone else who hates him, but the fact remains, I really don't see that he did anything all that bad, especially not in comparison with what other men in the novels were doing. 

Avallac'h is a sad, lonely old man, who tried to help Ciri, and went about it in unconventional ways because he has a serious lack of social skills.

No, he's no sweetheart either. No one in the Witcher series is. Avallac'h in the game, isn't half as arrogant or egotistical as Avallac'h of the novels. Avallac'h is almost as big of a douchebag dick as Geralt is (though I don't think anyone is capable of out douchebagging Geralt when it comes to douchebag dickery - if you like Geralt in the games, you'll probably hate him in the novels.... and damn if you hate Avallac'h for being a dick, then why the heck do you like Geralt?).

Yes, Avallac'h is a prickly, stuck up person, with more egos than you could count. Each of his egos has their own little pet egos just for good mesure in case he ran out of his own egos. And yes he does a lot of bad things. I never said he was a saint and he's certainly not an easy person to love.... uhm... looks over at Ben.... damn, if he isn't Avallac'h is a real person.


I don't hate him, I do like him, and he is my favorite character not only from the Witcher series, but from anything, game, movie, book or otherwise.

I'm sorry if that upsets you, but I'm not forcing you to like him. You like who you like, I like who I like. It is what it is.

If you don't like Avallac'h, then why are you here? No one asked you to watch my stream. If you hate Avallac'h, go find a channel that isn't worshipping him, because, you can rave and rant all you want, you ain't changing my mind about him, I'm going to continue to like him.

And in the end, it is Avallac'h whom Ciri ends up staying with, living with him at the Lake of Avalon, her becoming the Lady of the Lake and him becoming the Old Hermit aka The Fisher King who guards and protects her.

Avallac'h really does love Ciri and he stays by her side forever, for thousands of years, for eternity.

I think he could do better then Ciri, I mean, she is a whiny, annoying, self-centered, brat and she she constantly beats him up and smashes his things, and she not only raped him, but spent weeks practicing, training, and premeditating the rape before doing it.

If you don't like Avallac'h, and you hate my saying "Ciri and Avallac'h forever", then you'll really hate how the series ends.

I do wish the game devs had kept Avallac'h's character in the game, closer to his character in the novels. In the game, his wild, hyper, giddy behavour was striped away completly, as was his obsession with sex, his heavy use of fisstech, his being mute, his ability to control people's minds, his turning people into white marble statues when he got mad at them, his vicious temper at the mention of Lara's name.

And so here we are back to your question of who do I prefer with Avallac'h? Ciri or Lara?

Avallac'h has really bad taste in women. Lara and Ciri both treated him like shit. Not that Master Mirror, the Mirror Mage ever noticed, what with all those reflections of himself in all those mirrors of his.

How did they take Master Mirror the narcissistic Mirror Mage (Avallac'h) of the novels and come up with Guattner O Dimm in the game? Who knows.

Sorry to burst your G.O.D. loving bubble, but Guatner O'Dimm isn't in the novels and in the novels Avallac'h was Master Mirror and turned out he REALLY WAS God (*cough* Satan - hey look a giant snake big enough to eat a planet!) , creator of all life, but fell too much in love with himself, so he started cloning himself and created Lara Dorren, because he couldn't marry just ANY female, he had to marry a goddess like himself, one that he made with his own demon possed Elder Blood.

You do know that when I call Ciri the spawn of Satan I mean that literally right?

Ciri is Avallac'h's 5th great-granddaughter and in the novels, he really is Satan, we even see a quick scene of his Elf illusion crash for a second to let Ciri see the giant serpent Avallac'h really is in his true form.

Also, you overlooked one by the way: his ACTUAL WIFE, Isilira. She treated him like shit too. 

He uhm... yeah... a wife, a girlfriend, a prostitute,  a daughter, a sister, a granddaughter, and the girl he can't stop stalking... wait... which one is which? Oh yeah.. each of the 3 girls are all of the above.

This guy's got problems. Incest being number one on the list and obsessive creepazoid stalking being number 2 and boy does he need to lay off the viagra, I mean fisstech, because... uhm... this dick has got one hell of a big dick... no really, his dick shows up in the novels before he does, and more often then he does... and he just likes shoving fisstech up his dick.

I pity anyone who reads the novels and DOESN'T want Ciri's detailed description of Avallac'h's dick.

If a man wants to practice polygamy and bigamy side by side... he might want to learn the art of juggling his women better, or at least do a better job at keeping the hellcats out of the same room, because with the type of women he chooses,  they'll probably join forces and kill him rather then turn on each other.

His daughter cheated on him with a Human, his granddaughter cheated on him with a uhm, everyone, and his sister cheats on him with anyone willing to pay enough money.

I think Avallac'h needs to try to find women he's not related to, he didn't build in his lab, and he didn't raise himself.

He's got issues... big ones. .. including being a giant dick with a giant dick, which once he shows up in the novels, you'll be told every other paragraph because this guy loves his dick as much as he loves being a dick.

I mean we know Lara saw him as a father and not a husband and that's why she had no issues running off with Cregaggon.

And Ciri keeps beating him up, then running off with anyone and everyone she can shake her ass in front of, just so she can rape them, kill them, and proclaim she's a good lesbian for killing all the men she raped. Ciri refuses to even believe he's her grandfather, so she ain't got no issues shoving her face in his crotch, then talking about his erection for 4 pages, never mind the fact that she was 12 years old when she did that and he translated her doing so as "destiny" and hasn't stopped stalking her since. 

Ciri you pervert! You fell out the sky and landed face down in the crotch of a total stranger and rather then get off of him, you spend 4 pages marveling over the erection he's having because you've got your face shoved in his pants.

Did I mention, in the novels, you meet Avallac'h's dick BEFORE you meet Avallac'h. Yeah.

Okay... so Ciri's a bigger pervert than Avallac'h is... good to know.

Of course... giving the dick she was face down in... I'm a okay with her yapping on about it for 8 more pages if she wanted to. You'll know why soon enough... we'll get to it.

His sister Isillia thinks of herself as his mother, and being a prostitute at Crippled Kate's & Peg Leg Peggies, she brings home most of the money that funds Avallac'h's test-tube baby-wife-making lab experiments, because he's way too busy growing wives in his test tubes to go out and get a job himself. 

Avallac'h doesn't care that his women are using and abusing him, because hey, he's using them too! He just wants their babies so he make more clones of himself, because he's just so great he needs more of himself.

He only created Lara Dorren, (who is by the way, a clone of Avallac'h, which Avallac'h created in his lab, by mixing his own DNA into the fetus of a baby he cut out of King Auberon's pregnant wife), because...

...when you get right down to it, Avallac'h is too in love with himself, which is why he can only chase women with his blood in them... so he won't go after anyone who isn't related to him. He's weird that way.

Let's watch him get even weirder, though.

After kidnapping King Auberon's pregnant wife, cutting out her baby, injecting his own Elder Blood into said fetus developing in a test tube, he has a total psychotic breakdown when the kidnapped fetus-turned Avallac'h clone, grows up to be Lara Dorren and refuses to marry her mad scientist father who grew who her in a petri dish.

He keeps getting weirder... wait for it... 

...you'll know it when you see it. You might need eye bleach for it, but you'll definitely know it when you see it, just how weird this guy really is.

Because his daughter-clone Lara gets pregnant by a Human, he murders them both, in a fit of rage that he doesn't remember doing so tells everyone an angry mob killed her, but for some unknown reason, cuts the unborn baby out of his beloved daughter-clone-wife Lara, and takes it to live in the world of humans, where he does what all good Faeries do and kidnaps yet another baby, this time from a crib in the royal palace, leaving Lara's baby in the cradle in its place.

Who knows what happens to the actual royal baby, we are never told what he does with it, we are only told that he was being hunted by angry mobs who wanted to kill Lara's baby and somehow he escaped without the baby. 

What'd you do, just throw the baby at the angry mob and run away? 

He's such a coward, that's probably exactly what he did.

Lara Dorren's baby grows up to become a criminal, you know because she's the spawn of Satan, Satan blood in her an all that, and keeping traditions in the family, starts killing women and kidnapping their babies - we don't know why. She gives birth to twins, but she's got so many babies, no one knows which babies are really heirs to Lara Dorren's Elder Blood. 

The psycho baby kidnapping Queen spawn of Satan child of Avallac'h's clone Lara Dorren, ends up, hey guess where:

...in an insane asylum, where she dies a horrible death at just 21 years old, because Lara Dorren died a horrible death at 21 years old and apparently her baby ACTUALLY WAS Lara reborn, thus it was unable to live past 21 years in it's 2nd life because it had died at 21 years in it's 1st life.

So now we know Avallac'h is really Dr. Frankenstein and Lara Dorren is the Frankenstein Monster Bride that won't stay dead.

And how does Avallac'h respond to this discovery: "Oh boy, Lara Dorren is a goddess. She can't die! I'm a GOD! I created LIFE THAT WON'T DIE! I don't have to make another clone of myself. All I have to do is figure out which of these babies is her actual baby, because that's the one who has her 3rd incarnation living in it. Why the hell did she kidnap so many babies, I can't tell which one is Lara number 3. I know! I'll stalk all of them and their children and grandchildren for the next 200 years! Sooner or later I'll recognize my clone-monster-Lara-alter-ego."

I wish Gene Wilder was still alive so he could play Avallac'h in the Netflix series. Avallac'h is such a rip off of Young Frankenstein it ain't funny.

Enter now, the 3 story tall family tree, totally not creepy, scrawled across the every wall of his house, while he stalks every move made by every female heir of Lara, drawing it all out on his walls because that totally ain't stalker creepy, while he obsessively seeks out the female clone of himself who is destined to be his wife, because the only woman worthy to be the wife of him and all his egos is the female clone of him and all his egos, and he'll know her when he finds her because she'll be a psychotic, ego maniac, exactly like him, and will have his Elder Blood, have his powers, and be every bit of a deranged psychopath as he is.... she'll be so much like him he won't have to jerk off to himself in the mirror any more.

This guy's narcissism problems are bigger than his dick.

Hey here's a spoiler... if you ever want to defeat a psycho deranged mad scientist, necromancer, sorcerer who believes he is god and is totally in love with himself... just do what Ciri did and castrate him... then see what happens.

Yeah... you do know Ciri eventually castrates Avallac'h and he's a euach by the time the game starts, right?

There actually was a PLOT REASON why we get so many close ups on Avallac'h's dick and have to read through so much of Avallac'h monologuing on his love for his pride and joy: his giant dick... because by the end of the novel he's gonna lose it.

And as much as we see him making love to his own genius IQ, while glorifying the glories that are his brain... his love for his mega insane, mega genius brain, can't match his love for his mega size dick.

Have you ever read The Call of Cthulhu?

Better yet have you ever read SpellJammer.

There's a thing in SpellJammer called a Illithid, also known as a mind flayer. They are alien squid helmsman who absorb the bodies of Frost Elves and Moon Elves, and USUALLY the elf dies a horrible death, their brain being eaten and their body transforming into a giant bibedial squid.

They reproduce by injecting larva into the brains of their victims. It doesn't always work right and sometimes, some Elves retain their original Elf body, except for their eyes which turn white. This is caused by the fact that the larva, rather than absorb the Elf's brain, developed beside it.

These Mind Flayers who still look like Elves, cause the Great Conjunction of the Crystal Spheres, and fly on Nautiloid Pirate ships between planets, abducting pregnant women to inject with larva so they can populate the universe with Mind Flayers.

SpellJammer is one of the many novels that Andrzej Sapkowski plagiarized in the writing of the Witcher novels, and he even admitted it in an interview, that he based Avallac'h off the SpellJammer Helmsmen.

SpellJammer is a 7 volume set of sci-fi novels and a 200+ volume set of Dungeons and Dragons game guides, that has been dubbed by fans as "Elves In Space".

Anyways.... back to Avallac'h, and... things he should only have one of but for some reason has two of....

This guy's mega-narcissism, makes every good megalomaniac out there want to run away screaming in terror.

His hope that Lara has finally been reborn a full and complete clone of him rises when he hears word of a deranged 8 year old who can't stop killing everything, is said by others to be a living weapon, and is being hunted by every mage in the universe hoping to drain her Elder Blood to mix with their potions. 

"Oh boy! It's a female version of myself, let's go stalk her and convince her she's my wife whether she wants to be my wife or not! Because she's so much like me, she must love me as much as I love me."

Wait... wait... did we say my? No. We meant to say we.




Let's rephrase that in proper Avallac'h plural third person monologue.

"Oh boy! It's a female version of ourselves, we must go stalk her and convince her she's our  wife whether she wants to be our wife or not! Because she's so much like we are, she must love us as much as we love ourselves."

Avallac'h, in the novels, speaks of himself in plural third person.

While Geralt thinks of Avallac'h as a monster, so overlooks the Elf speaking of himself in plural third person.... Ciri actually asked Avallac'h, who is we, there's never anyone with you, who the hell are you talking about when you keep saying we all the time...

Ciri... what is wrong with you? Why would you do that? If there's anything we've learned from super hero comic books is you never ask the egomaniac mad scientist why he's talking about himself in plural third person.

Avallac'h tells Ciri exactly who WE are. 

We is me, myself, and my glorious sentient brain that lives in my head and tells us what to do, because our IQ is so far above and beyond anything anyone can comprehend, that we had no one intelligent to talk to, so we started talking to our own brain, which surprisingly started talking back to us... we have the most gloriously intelligent conversations with ourselves... and you dear daughter of Lara get to witness our magnificent mental breakdown in all its glory, aren't you excited? Now sit there and marvel at our astoundingly, mind boggling glory while we try to think of some adjectives ending in -ly that we have not yet used to described how marvelous wonderful our brain is. Let's ask our brain what it thinks, it must know some ly adjectives we have not said yet.

Oh by the way, did we tell you we are Jewish, are speaking to you in Hebrew, and since we can't have a Jesus complex, we gonna have ourselves a Noah complex instead? Did you know we are building a giant ship to travel between worlds, because we now have a phobia of portals after nearly destroying the universe by making too many portals, but we are fauna rights activists and we must save everything and every one on every planet we nearly destroyed by putting portals there, and because we don't know how to close the portals and the White Cold is killing them all now and it's all our fault, so it's our responsibility to rescue everybody, our brain told us so...

"Humans too?" Ciri mindlessly interrupts the sage's 7 page monologue of endless overuse of the same self glorifying -ly adjectives, not yet taking her eyes from his tight pants and not paying attention to a word he's saying because he's been alone and talking to himself for so many centuries, that having someone to talk to, is giving him yet another erection and she's too busy wondering if his pants are painted on to have heard anything he just said on the last 7 pages of this weird Willy Wonka boat ride on a pink river boat made out of cotton candy.

"Dh'on too! We must rescue everybody, even unintelligent lifeforms, because everything has the potential to evolve and become intelligent like us. We are going to fly our boat across the sky and save everyone on every planet, Bring them all back here to avalon where they can worship our glorious brain that saved them all our previous stupidity of youth!"

uh huh... ooooo kaaay .... so how much LSD did you mix with your fisstech again?

I hate to say it but... Avallac'h is SOOOOO obnoxious, and his over use of ly adjectives and never stopping to take a breath between paragraphs, make his his plural third person monologuing VERY difficult to read.

And why is Avallac'h taking Ciri on boat ride down the river in a boat made out of pink cotton candy other than Johnny Depp's Willy Wonka also had a boat made of pink candy?

Yay! Just what Ciri always wanted, someone with a bigger ego then she has! ... and also has a giant dick to match, which is apparently the only thing on Ciri's mind for next 32 pages.

Insanity, thy name is Avallac'h, and you are way to in love with yourself... and uhm... you need to put some pants on. You're kind of naked... as we readers are just starting to realize WHY his pants look so tight.

Do you know WHY Ciri raped Avallac'h? She actually did have a reason... you know, other then spending the previous 32 pages obsessing over OMG! his tight pants!

We don't know what any of the other Elves wear, but boy do we know Avallac'h must need servants to help him squeeze into those super tight pants, because Ciri can't stop telling us how tight his pants are every five minutes.

So, in spite of the fact that she can't get her mind out of Avallac'h's crotch, Ciri comes up with a reason why she must rape him, convinces herself it has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that his pants may possible be painted on and not actually made of cloth, and then spends 8 weeks plotting and planning how she's going to rape him, while justifying it's all his fault because his belittled her brain, and her brain is every bit as magnificent as his brain.

Let me also point out that Ciri tells us in this exact same scene, that Avallac'h's wives don't wear cloths and have their "clothes" painted on them in glitter paint every day... and omg, wait... are Avallac'h's pants actually painted on? No wonder his pants are so damned tight... he's not wearing any is he? That's just black paint. Well, now I MUST rape him. What excuse can I come up with?


Ciri, what are doing? 

I thought you were trying to prove you had a bigger brain, not that you were the bigger dick? 

But hey, what do we readers care that Ciri is sitting here plotting to rape her grandfather, when we just found out Avallac'h's been prancing around naked the whole time. No wonder his pants are so tight.

BOY was it a reason... apple doesn't fall far from the tree, so let's rape granddaddy egomaniac to prove granddaughter psychopath as a more intelligent brain then he does.


That's your reason for raping your grandfather? To prove you're the one with the bigger IQ?

What the fuck?

You're both crazy!

While Avallac'h is yap, yap, yapping about the glories that are his brain... 

Ciri makes the fatal error of interrupting his self-glorifying, brain worshipping plural third person monologue to point out that she is smarter then he is.

Oh joy... 

Ciri you idiot... 

Ciri and Ge'els in Avallac'h's Pali Gap bedroom in my 4th Playthrough of witcher 3 (The Ge'els Playthrough)

have you never read a superhero comic book... 

you NEVER interrupt the ego manic genius mad scientist super villain while he's glorifying how spectacular his brain is... 

especially not to tell him that puny little idiot you is smarter and more intelligent than the sentient brain that is happily living in his skull and has delightful conversations with him every day.

Why couldn't they have made Avallac'h in the game act like Avallac'h in the novels? Why? Him and his brain were a riot!

You know, half the reason I keep reading Lady of the Lake is so we try not to laugh at the raving lunatic while he has conversations with his brain.


Ciri tells Avallac'h her brain is smarter then his brain...

Soooo, Avallac'h dissolves into a manic depressive bi-polar meltdown over Ciri insulting his delightfully glorious brain.... check that... our.... our delightfully glorious brain.... brains.... both of them.

I think Avallac'h might have fried his brain with too many drugs.

"What would you, savage spawn of Creagaanon know about intelligence. You are are not one of the elite. We are the elite and none can compare to us..."

.... hey yeah, let's just completely ignore the fact that you and your glorious brain were just five minutes ago telling her she was a goddess because the blood of Lara Dorren's genes flowed in her veins, which you just said made Ciri a part of you and that glorious brain that lives in your head, and we already know she's just as crazy, just as sociopathic, and just as arrogant as you, so why can't she be just as smart as you too?

You wanted someone who was just like you, your equal, and when faced with the possibility of finally having that you have a whining crybaby meltdown... hey wait... Ciri has whinny, crybaby meltdowns every 5 minutes.... I just figured out where she got it from... she really is his female self isn't she?

The scene now flip flops in and out of Ciri's fuming internal dialogue with her own magnificent brain...

Oh great... now they are BOTH talking to their magnificent brains... Ciri is acting more like Avallac'h every second.

You know when Ciri and Avallac'h are together it's hard to tell where one begins and the other ends. They are so much alike, it's like they are twins... oh wait... she's one of his clones... yeah... that explains a lot.

I've got the best brain there is, my inner goddess told me so and she's never wrong.

Your puny brain of Cregagnon can never match our brains!

Your brain isn't half as smart as my brain, I know because my inner goddess told me so, and her inner goddess told her so.... and all three of us can out smart both of your brains... omg those pants... my inner goddess is doing jumping jacks while her inner goddess is blushing red, white, and blue, stars and stripes...

uhm... Hi Anna! What are you doing living in Ciri's brain? Is that Christian over there living in Avallac'h's brain?

Wait... what year did he write Lady of the Lake again?

Checks date.


I get it.

I see what he did.

Wow. So Andrzej Sapkowski plagiarism yet another book. 

geeee... I wonder what the top selling novel was the New York Time's Bestseller List the same year Andrzej Sapkowski was writing Lady of the Lake...

"Oh my stars and stripes, my inner goddess is telling me what to do again... OMG look at his tight grey pants, my inner goddess is running circles in my brain while blushing red, white and blue, his eyes are so grey... but OMG his David Bowie pants, my brain can't stop ogling his David Bowie pants! What the fuck, why the hell did he just rip my clothes off, pull out my tampon and throw it across the room, but what do I care, my inner goddess has an inner goddess and they both doing jumping jacks inside my brain because look at his pants..."

OH, pick me! Pick me! Raises hand, bum off the chair like Hermione Granger! I know what book Andrzej Sapkowski was reading while writing Lady of the Lake! He likes 50 Shades of Grey! 

So while Christian Grey tells Anna the glories of his marvelous brain, and Anna blushes in time to the jumping jacks her inner goddess is doing inside of her brain, because she can't take her eyes off Grey's David Bowie pants...

oh wait... wrong novel.

So while Avallac'h tells Ciri the glories of his marvelous brain, and Ciri  blushes in time the jumping jacks her inner goddess is doing inside of her brain, because she can't take her eyes off Avallac'h's David Bowie pants...

Ciri decides to tell the ego maniac "Ha ha! I'm smarter than you, You couldn't defeat the White Frost could you. Guess what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna defeat the White Frost and you can't stop me so there, nananana! I got the bigger brain!"

Ciri raped Avallac'h 20 pages later, because his response to her telling him, that she was going to defeat the White Frost just to prove she has a bigger brain then he does:

"You, haha, my dear idiot spawn of Creaganon, ..."

Avallac'h with beautiful blond hair like he had in the novels

Why doesn't Avallac'h in the game ever call Ciri "idiot spawn of Creaganon" every five minutes like he did in the novels?

You glorious daughter of Lara!

You savage spawn of Creaganon!

My dear little Zerial, daughter of LaLuna.

Stop being Creaganon's barbaric offspring and act more like Lara!

My lovely LocHelion. (My lovely Lady of the Lake).

Uhm... only once in the novels does he ever call her Zireal. Yet in the game it's ALL he ever calls her. He called her LocHelion most of the time. Until she beat him up for it and didn't dare call her that again after that and started calling her Daughter of Lara or Spawn of Creaganon instead.

He never called her Ciri and he only called her Ziereal in the presence of King Auberon.

It was Auberon and Eredin who kept calling Ciri Zerieal.  


"You, haha, my dear idiot spawn of Creaganon, Lara couldn't defeat the White Cold and you have only rudimentary traces of her powers, you don't even possess one, one thousandth of her abilities, and she was simply a shadow of the Elder God, she didn't even have one, one thousandth of our powers."

We see Anna's infuriated inner goddess screaming hell fire at Grey from inside Anna's brain, as I mentally instructed my inner goddess to shoot daggers of hate at Grey's David Bowie pants...

oh wait... wrong novel again....

We see Ciri's infuriated inner goddess screaming hell fire at Avallac'h from inside Ciri's brain, as I mentally instructed my inner goddess to shoot daggers of hate at Avallac'h's David Bowie pants...

WOW - he even copied the bad grammar, shift in point of view and everything.

The White Orchard sunsets in Witcher 3 are amazing!

Can anyone say plagiarism much?

I love that Andrzej Sapkowski finished his series in 6 volumes, and only wrote the 7th volume 14 years later when he decided to rip off 50 Shades of Grey and try to pass it off as yet another Witcher novel.

He made Lady of the Lake the best novel ever written for me, what with how well he line for line copy and pasted 50 Shades of Grey and just changes Anna's name to Ciri and Grey's name to Avallac'h.

So, infuriated that he told her she only had 1/1,000 of Lara's powers and Lara had only 1/1.000 of his powers, Ciri decided to prove she has the most powerful brain, by training her brain to block out his brain's mind reading ability, then sneak up on him and rape him.



He called you stupid, using a mathematical equation to do so, and for THAT now you're plotting to rape him?

Okay... there's some bad b-movie logic for you.

 Is this a novel I'm reading or is it the script for SharkNado 9: 12 Year Old Retarded Beach Babes Raping Senile Old Men To Gain Brain Skills?

What the fucking hell?

There is something seriously wrong with Ciri.

How many times was she dropped on her head as a baby?

Can anyone say: "Damn what a retard!"

Ciri's lack of any level of brain cells at all, is really showing in this scene.

I don't get it.

Why are you plotting to rape him?

Where does that logic fit in here?

The guy is 2,000 years old minimum. Obviously he's senile. Clearly he's insane. He's talking with his best friend brain.

His brain is answering him back. He and his brain are having the most delightful conversation about building a flying pirate ship for his baby.

He's been calling you spawn of Creganon for the last several years, which is way bigger insult than being called stupid.

He can barely stand up, and needed your help to even get on the boat you two are now sitting on.

He's old and senile and crazy... and you should know by now that he thinks EVERYBODY is stupid, it's not like he was singling you out.

So, what logic are you using her to decide: 

"He called me stupid, I'll show him how smart I am, I'm gonna rape him, and you can't stop me so there! Let me rip my panties off and masterbate for the reader again, "Nananananaaaaaa!"

Uhm... I can see WHY he is calling you stupid. You can't stop shoving your hand up your cunt while screaming "Nananananaaaaaa!": I'd call you retarded then smash your damned vile slut assed face in with a brick.

hey... you know what?... there was never any plausible logic in any of the first 6 Witcher novels, why was I expecting anything logical in the 7th novel?

Well, at least we know when psycho, manic, geniuses have a battle of the brains, it all comes down to who can fuck who the most violently.

Wait... what?

What is wrong with Andrzej Sapkowski?

I've been asking that question ever since that scene when Geralt is sexually attracted to projectile diarrhea.


I can't stop asking... why?

Why is Geralt sexually aroused by projectile diarrhea?

Why is projectile diarrhea a reason to have sex?

And what the hell kind of a freak has a fetish for rolling around in diarrhea?

What the hell?

Geralt is insane.

No... no. Andrzej Sapkowski is insane. He's got some sort of a weird feces fetish.

Why does every character in the novel series have some weird freaked out connection to feces?

Why does Avallac'h have feces just laying around his house so he can throw it at Geralt?

And why is Geralt having an erection over it?

Avallac'h, you should probably run, Geralt has a shit fetish and he doesn't what he fucks.

Good god does Andrzej Sapkowski ever have issues. I would like to send a team of psychiatrists to his house to ask: What the fuck?

 Have you ever read a novel and wondered: When do the characters take a piss? Does anyone ever have to stop and take a shit?

Well, you will never have to ask that question while reading the Witcher novels, because Andrzej Sapkowski made sure that every time someone has t take a shit, Geralt is right their with his face up their ass to get you all the details.

Geralt, what the fuck? 

Andrzej Sapkowski, what the fuck? Why would you write these scenes?

Every other page of every novel in the series, somebody is either brutally and violently raping somebody else, or taking a shit why Geralt has an erection over it, or Geralt else Geralt is just raping people in their own shit.

What the flying fuck is the Witcher novels? 

The Witcher novels are none stop shit fetish rape fantasy. That's it. Nothing else.

The Witcher novels are weird. Bordering on Bizzaro.

And now Ciri is plotting to rape a senile old man who throws feces at people, because he called her stupid. 

Well, at least Andrzej Sapkowski was consistent in tossing feces and rape at us yet again.

So he's a freaking genius, which we kind of already knew seeing how he invented portals, perfected cloning, and nearly destroyed the universe by accidently causing the great conjunction of spheres when he killed too many unicorns and used their blood to build too many portals on too many planets, with all of his way too many magic mirrors, you know because he's so damned glorious in all his glory that the universe needed to see him and glorious pet brain.

Why doesn't Avallac'h throw feces at people and talk to his glorious brain in the game? He'd have been so much more interesting had they kept him closer to his psychotically deranged, deeply insane novel self.

Uhm... you almost destroyed the universe... because you didn't have enough freaking mirrors to look at yourself in. You know that right? 

But now we know that he knows he's a genius and that's why he and his best friend brain have so many egos, and had to start talking to all of his egos because his wife-clone-Lara was too much of an idiot to recognize his greatness and marry the glory that is him, himself, and his genius brain!

And other then the fact that Avallac'h has deep conversations with his own brain, he's building Noah's Ark, he isn't actually wearing pants it's just body paint, and Ciri's going to rape him because his brain called her brain stupid, what did we learn from this scene?

That the Mad Hatter had more sanity in his entire tea party, then Avallac'h has in a single brain cell. 

And speaking of brain cells... does Ciri even have any?

The biggest problem with Ciri is she is the flattest, flat piece of crap, flattened cardboard you are ever gonna see in literature.

Novel Ciri can make Bela Swan look like a 3 dimensional well written character. 

Yeah. Ciri is THAT bland, that flat, that Mary Sue, that badly written.

Which is sad because Andrzej Sapkowski is realy, realy, realy, REALLY good at written insanely well developed, 3 dimensional characters - so long as they only appear 1 chapter and don't have to hold their own for the entire novel.

There are more than 5,000 minor side character in the novels and ever damned one of them has character, personality, and a well fleshed out backstory... and with only 4,000 pages of novel, most all of them appear on 1 page each.

The problem seems to be that  Andrzej Sapkowski put so much time, care, love, and effort into creating each of the 5,000+ one page, one shot wonders that he didn't have time to put as much effort, care, love and attention in the main character.

This is sad, because Ciri had so much potential to be a well written character.

But what do we get?

Ciri is nothing but a well fluffered 12 year old dripping pussy that has a handful of catchphrases and never stops whining long enough for you to ever get to know her. 

If the novels could stop focusing on getting as far up her vagina as possible, you might actual find out there was a person attached to the vagina.

But nope, Andrzej Sapkowski is a peadophile in his 60's and the Witcher novels are outright blatant child porn whose only real purpose is to shove a 12 year olds naked vagina in the reader's face every other page and so Ciri remains a faceless vagina waiting to be fucked for the entire story.

Even though the real 12 year old can usually have more intelligent conversations then an adult, 12 year old Ciri can barely bumble a full sentence together and 90% of her dialogue consists of a handful of repeated phrases:

* Nanananana!

* You can't stop me so there!

* You can't do nothing about it, so there!

* I want Mommy Yennefer.

* I want sex.

* Fuck me now.

* Nanananana!

The Ha-Ha bully in The Simpsons has more dialogue options then Ciri does.

Even though she's 12 in most of the series, it's usually difficult to believe she's older then 2. 

Ciri only opens here mouth under 2 circumstances:

* If she trying to shove a cock in it


* Whine, whine, whimper, bitch, moan, me, me, me, look at my pussy, whine, whine, whine, me, me, whine, bitch, bitch, bitch, me, me, look at me, look at me, I got pussy, whine, whine, bitch, boo-hoo, whine, whine, bitch, bitch, LOOK AT MY FUCKING PUSSY!

Novel Ciri is the 12 year old whiny piss ant who wants to do nothing and get laid.

Wait...is it even normal for a 12 year old to know what sex is, let alone be demanding she wants it every five seconds?

It's painfully obvious that Andrzej Sapkowski has never been in a room with a real 12 year old before... and that's probably a good thing.

It's difficult to read how many THOUSANDS of times this man in his 60s puts a 12 year old's vagina on the page and not wonder how this guy has been able to stay out of prison.

While I like the story and most of the characters, I also feel Andrzej Sapkowski goes way too overboard on obsessively shoving Ciri vagina in the reader's face and I do wonder why Andrzej Sapkowski is not in prison where his pedophile ass clearly belongs.

Andrzej Sapkowski is lucky he doesn't live in America where books like his can't be published and authors writing such novels are fined $250,000 and get minimum 25 years in prison.

Of course, Poland has the highest rate of child rape on the planet and is a country where rape IS NOT A CRIME.

Did you know that the top selling picture book in Poland in 2017 marketed to a 6 year old demographic, included a 3 page fully illustrated rape scene of a man raping a 6 year old boy?

Poland has no age of consent, rape is not a crime, is the planet's top producer of child prostitutes, the highest rate of child rape, and the highest rate of child marriages.

Poland is also the planet's top producer of the Child Porn genre, and by comparison to other novels published in Poland, the Witcher novels are very, very, VERY tame.

I have a brother who collects Polish movies, but could not find them, so asked me to look for them for him because I have connections to several dealers of rare imported items... before looking for his gay porn dvds, I had not delved into Polish imports before... note of warning: Don't, just don't... realy, if you don't have a stomach of steel, DO NOT try to find any Polish media that's banned in America... it's 99% Child Porn Rape Fantasy. Child Porn Rape Fantasy is played in Poland silver screen mainstream theaters just as merrily as Disney cartoons are played on the big screen in America. Poland is a sick twisted country.

And then, being the author of 130+ novels myself, I've since gotten books deals with Polish publishers... usually a publisher will tell you "there's too much, can you tone it back", not in Poland, there publishers "there's not enough sex, you think you could add more?", and while the rest of the publishing world tells authors "make sure everyone is over 18" Polish publishers say: "You think you could make the girl younger? 10 maybe. Teens are little too old for our readers".

I had my first face to face meeting with a Polish publisher in June 2018... he brought with him a copy of every book their house had published the previous year - which included that picture book I mentioned, and some of the wildest tentacle porn comic books I've ever encountered.

If Japanese Hentai is too much for you... you better run screaming from EVERYTHING that comes out of Poland.

Once I realized what the Polish publishing industry was like, suddenly I realized, why Andrzej Sapkowski didn't bother to develop Ciri as a character, put her in her first sex scenes at 8 years old, and left her being nothing but a 12 year old whining vagina with no personality.

Back to the story.


Just think, all of this started because an ancient creature was the last of his kind and was very lonely so he cloned himself to make himself a lover, and she ran off with a human, leaving him now alone and feeling even worse because now he's alone and unloved. So he waits for her child to grow up in hopes it will love him and it doesn't, so he waits for the next child to grow up and love him, and that one doesn't love him either.

Than his 5th great-granddaughter Cirilla is born....

Avallac'h discovers that his daughter-clone-wife Lara has returned back to life once again as Lara 5.0 and she is happily mass murdering everyone in the universe while while everyone in the universe is trying desperately to stay alive kill her before there is no one left at all, which excites Avallac'h to no end and he watches every move his granddaughter-hellspawn-shedevil-clone-wife-to-be makes in a magic mirror, because, that's not creepy.

Because, we didn't already know he was a sadistic psychotic stalker creep, enough, and we needed to know Avallac'h was even more insane then we already knew he was... he takes up the habit of dropping portals in every path Ciri takes, so that she gets zipped through all of his magic mirrors every few days, and gets to see the vast diversity of the universe... because making magic mirrors, turning them into portals and tossing your 8 year old grandchildren through them is what every good grandfather does!

Avallac'h has issues... so many issues.

After 4 years of watching his monster-clone-granddaughter-future-wife-Ciri mass murdering everyone through his magic mirror, Avallac'h is horrified when one of the 101 people to capture and torture her is now shoving 8 hot pokers up her vagina.... something which is going to damage her ovaries and prevent her from having granddaddy-psycho-scientist's babies.

So... time for one more portal... psycho-serial-killer-granddaughter-clone Ciri is magicly popped out of prison, jumps in a tower, flies through a portal, falls out of the sky, and lands face down in the crotch of an elf who's having an erection over the stripper she-elves that are dancing around him.

David Bowie's Labyrinth's Goblin King Jareth's pants would be so proud of Andrzej Sapkowski for giving us that 4 page description of Avallac'h's erection in his way too tight pants - that we later find out never were real pants at all because his pants are just body paint - that 12 year old Ciri just refuses to take her face out of because she just can't stop talking about her grandfather's pants.

So the reader FINALLY gets to meet this faceless character who has been a mystery for the entire of 6 previous novels... 

and... uhm... well... 

We meet his erection at least.

The Witcher novels are such badly written porn, they read like a 12 year old girl on fanfiction dot net who never saw a penis before... oh wait... Ciri in this scene is supposed to be a 12 year old girl who never saw a penis before... great.

So... 4 pages of Avallac'h's penis later... hey look, the penis is actually part of somebody... oh wow he's got a face... hey, there's an actual guy here... I haven't just been monologuing about a disembodied penis for the last 4 pages.... wait... why are you calling me Lara? I'm not Lara. I'm Ciri.


DESTINY!!! ELDER BLOOD! PROPHECY! CHOSEN ONE! DAUGHTER OF LARA! WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG! YOU FINALLY ARRIVED! WE MUST CELEBRATE! blah, blah, blah, blah.... oh yeah, by the way, Lara's dead, we have to resurrect her, because we is an insane mad scientist who is refusing to admit we are also a necromancer, we just need your baby to make a new body to put Lara's lost soul in, because it's really our soul, and we've gone insane because we cut our soul in half after reading Harry Potter and put half of it in that bitch Lara who left us for Cregaggon, THAT BASTARD CREAGANON RUINED ALL OUR PLANS! HE STOLE OUR BLOOD! but bless Lara's evil soul, Creganon deceived her and she just didn't know how much she really loved us and our glorious brain, her being a clone of us and all that... except we accidently killed her mother when we cut the fetus out of her, so she can't give us another baby to make a new Lara clone of ourselves with, so let's get you dressed up like a prostitute and toss you in bed with Lara's biological father, so we can try not to kill you the same way we accidently - whoops -  killed his wife when we cut her baby out of her except we've been practicing, so we probably won't kill you like we did her, maybe. Here, have some pink cotton candy laced with fisstech, never mind that white van over there, that's not our spaceship, there's no UFO, we aren't alien elves from outer space getting ready abduct you and probe you in every way possible. Look we've got a silver mask that doesn't any way make us look like Grey aliens with with fetishes for stealing unborn babies out of pregnant women. ... 

Avallac'h apparently talks very fast, speaks in one long un on sentence, and never stops yapping long enough to breath.

Meanwhile there is a unicorn standing there screaming: 

In my 11th Playthrough of Witcher 3 (my 2nd Avallac'h Playthrough) we let the Ice Trolls eat Folan

Run Ciri run!

It's The Fox, he's gonna kill you!

He's gonna put babies in you then rip them back out of you, and then he's gonna kill you... run Ciri, run, hurry, I can get you out of here!

Stop listening to that unicorn. Hey! Crossbow girl! Shoot that unicorn over there....

Ciri .... why aren't you running from this guy? Please listen to the unicorn and run.

Oooooooooooh.... paaaaaaaaants....

oh yeah. I forgot. His pants are painted on. The thought of giving you cocaine then cutting babies out of your pregnant belly is giving him an orgasm. And you've never seen a man have an erection before.

Ciri, please stop eating the pink cotton candy.

Hey! Here's an idea... how about you DON'T RUN AWAY and instead just keep staring at his erection and eating his drugged candy, while he starts telling you how much he likes putting fistech under his foreskin because it makes women addicted to having sex with him... 

But he's my grandfather.... sure he's bipolar, manic depressive, takes too many drugs, is in love with himself, suicidal, and talks to his brain, but he's my dear old grandpappy!

Yeah... and that means he wants to have sex with you, because you know, incest is one of his many, many, many mental issues...

WoooooooooooooooooooooooW the leaves on the trees are purple! There's a red unicorn! The grass is pink too now! Look at the pretty rainbow bubbles floating all around me...

The unicorn is still telling Ciri to run.

Ciri... you REALLY should be running right now, not standing here eating the fisstech drugged cotton candy he just gave you... try to stop being hypnotized by the giant snake and listen to the unicorn...

And in the next scene... Ciri wonders why she wakes up in bed with the elf with the triangle face.... and omg these fox fur blankets are soooo soft... wait who are you and why am I in your bed? 

....here have some more candy, our brain told us to give it to you.

So many people TRIED to get in Ciri the entire of the first 6 novels... turns out all they needed to do was distract her by painting their pants on with body paint and give her drugged cotton candy.



Avallac'h was a villain in the novels.

Did I mention that?

You get an entire scene of Avallac'h outright telling her that, he's going to drug her, probe her, and put her in bed with other elves because he's got a dead wife to resurrect and he needs her baby to be the vessel to do it, he raves and rants about Ciri's blood is stolen property because Creagagnon got Lara pregnant, Lara's blood is Avallac'h's blood because he spent 700 years putting his blood into that fetus to turn it into his Lara clone, he wants all that blood he drained out of himself back, he even gives her drugged candy and tells her he drugged it... and the whole time Ciri is drooling over his pants.

A unicorn shows up and tells Ciri: get the hell out of here he's gonna kill you. RUUUUUUUUN!

Oooooooooooh.... but he's wearing David Bowie's Goblin King paaaaaaaaants.... my inner goddess is having jumping jack orgams.

Oh! Hi Anna! Didn't recognize you what with all those GREY ashes in your hair.

Wait... I've read this before. What year did Andrzej Sapkowski write this book again?

Oh no! Andrzej Sapkowski did it again. He plagiarized yet another New York Times Bestseller that I already read.

Hey Anna, you know this psycho billionaire with the fetishes and the dungeon full of sex toys, really isn't the right guy for you, you know that right?

But my inner goddess is having seizures over his pants...

My Ciri's Fashion Wardrobe Mod

Ciri... you wanted to prove you had the bigger brain... this scene proves Avallac'h's brain trump's you brain big time, seeing how all he to do was  give you candy and wave his painted erection in your face to get you in his bed.

Ciri is kind of sort of listening to all of this and going: I don't want to have your baby, I'm not giving you a baby, what the fuck, is that a black guy over there, no way in hell am I fucking black Eredin, your King Auberon better not be black or I ain't fucking him either.... but OMG David Bowie's pants are hypnotizing me I must do everything the Goblin King's pants tell me to do.... oh look drugged candy! Yeah, it's okay, he's my grandfather.




Just... why?

You were trying to prove to us you had the most powerful brain and left us wondering if you even have a brain at all!

The gigolo elf with painted on pants and pink cotton candy took you down in what... 5 seconds?

But WHY did we see any of this happen at all?

Oh... how about because this scene was taken straight out of a book called Lolita about an elderly man who decides to do a social sciences study on the sexual psychology of little girls, so he starts seducing a 12 year old.

Oh he just plagiarism yet another book. Hey, is there a book out there that he HASN'T plagiarized?

Don't believe me? Well... 

Before Ciri met Avallac'h in this wild scene, Geralt met Avallac'h and Avallac'h outright told Geralt that he was about to perform an experiment involving Ciri. He wanted to test a theory.

Avallac'h in the very first scene of him, describes himself as asexual, having tried every form of sex possible, with every type of sentient life form possible, in a scientific attempt to understand why other elves and humans were so obsessed with sex.

He tells Geralt that his scientific findings were that sex was boring, lacked excitement, and offered no fascination for him, and that this was why he devoted his life to studying the sex lives of others to try to figure out why they liked sex.

And Geralt asks Avallac'h: "What does anything you just said have to do with Ciri?"

Avallac'h bursts out laughing and says he's lived to long, life is boring and he's about to put a pebble in the works.

Because, he's sick of waiting for prophecies to happen on their own and wants to see how badly his actions will change the future.

But then we jump back to Ciri waking up in bed with Avallac'h, after he drugged her with cotton candy and gave her one hell of show in his pants....

...and we see Ciri enraged and infuriated when she realizes that, while this whole thing was set up to look like he had raped her... they never had sex.

Ciri is infuriated because she WANTED him to have sex with her and... he just tossed her in his bed and went to sleep without ever doing anything to her.

Avallac'h we learn is asexual and has not had sex in over 200 years and Ciri could trust him, because never would have sex with her or anyone else.

But don't worry dear sweet reader, in a few pages, Avallac'h's social science experiment studying the sexual reactions of a 12 year old girl, will have him very condescendingly with lots of ly adjectives tossing her in King Auberon's bed.

We do see Ciri building a very strong trust for Avallac'h because she is able to sleep in his bed with him, without him ever trying to touch her, and finds him quite content to ACTUALLY SLEEP when he wants to sleep with her. Resulting in the two of them always sleeping together, cuddled up hugging each other while they sleep. 

This habit of sleeping with each other, but never having sex results in the two of them forming a strong bond, each of them feeling fully and totally safe with the other.

Ciri goes back and forth for 20 pages, DESPERATELY WANTING TO HAVE SEX WITH AN ELF... ANY ELF... JUST GET SOME DAMN ELF DICK IN ME ALREADY!!!! And this has Avallac'h backing off with the over sexual perversion we saw him doing the first 20 pages of this chapter.

Avallac'h starts trying to calm down Ciri, and Ciri's wild violent temper turns her to attacking everyone, because she's just damned sick of the slutty male elves prancing around their sexuality and refusing to have sex with her.

Here's a question:

Ciri, you just spent 6 novels being chased by every pervert under the sun, and refusing to let any of them have sex with you, than you fall out of the sky and land face down in gigolo elf boy's pants, think he wants to have sex with you, get mad at him for wanting to have sex with you and want to kill him, then realize, he's asexual, got no libido, and has absolutely no interest in having sex with you, so you get mad at him and start screaming "HAVE SEX WITH ME" every five minutes and threaten to kill his if he doesn't have sex with you. Why? 


Just why? 

You finally got what you wanted - probably the only guy in the universe who DOES NOT want to have sex with you - so why are you trying to force him to have sex with you?

"Because I'm the greatest piece of shit to walk this planet and everyone ought to want to have sex with me, and there's nothing you can do about it so there! Nanananananaaaaaa."

I lose brain cells every time I read a scene where Ciri acts more retarded then she did in the last scene.

Could somebody please kill Ciri and put a more intelligent inbred clone of Avallac'h in her place?

I mean at least Avallac'h has a brain in his head, or two... maybe three, we ain't sure how many brains he talks to, and they're all talking in his head at once and driving him insane, but at least he's got one, which is more than we can say for Ciri.

I wish I could say the Witcher novels were written by a 5 year old who didn't know what they were writing, instead of a 60 year old peadophille obsessed with putting a 12 year old's vagina on display every 5 paragraphs, for no reason at all other then to put a 12 year old's vagina on display every 5 paragraphs of 4,000 pages of all 8 volumes of his dirty old man peadophile sex fantasies.

If Ciri had been a little bit older and a little less retarded, she could have actually been a likable character.

But why would a 60 year old author give his main character a brain or a personality when she's a 12 year old with a pussy? Who needs a brain or a personality when you a child with a vagina?

And there are people who actually wonder why the Witcher novels were banned from being published in America for nearly 40 years, and even today still banned in their uncensored form... the American English translations are HEAVILY abridged and censored, ESPECIALLY Chapter 5 of Lady of the Lake... including that:

#ALL REFERENCES TO CIRI'S AGE ARE REMOVED FROM THE AMERICAN EDITIONS... leaving most American unaware that Ciri is only 8 years old in her earliest sex scenes, only 12 years old when living with Avallac'h, has 8 sex scenes EACH with BOTH Avallac'h and Auberon before the rape scene on page 179, and is only 14 in the end series when she goes back to and marries Avallac'h.

"My brain is is better than all of your brains and I'm gonna rape you because I'm a sex crazed reeeeeetaaaaaaard  and there's nothing you can do about it so there! Nanananananaaaaaa. Look I've got a pussy, let me fluffer it for you."

Ahhhh.... yes, of course, you're a sex crazed megalomaniac psychopath, who can't imagine there exists anyone who doesn't want to have sex with you.

How silly of me, I forgot.

Have sex with me right now.


Why not?

You're not Lara.

But I want sex.

And we don't want to.

I want sex.

We don't care.

I want sex.

Lara is dead.

I want sex.

We spent 700 years building Lara. And Creganon took her away from us.

I want sex.

Get away from us, you're not Lara!

You said you want a baby!

We want Lara's baby.

I want to have sex with you.

We don't want to have sex with you.

I want sex.

You're 12 years old.

I want sex.

We are asexual. 

I want sex.

We don't have sex with any body.

I want sex.

Nobody loves us because we can not have sex with them.

I want sex.

Here wear this Verbena perfume we laced with fisstech. It'll make you too crazy to know what's going on while we get off on you smelling like Lara.

I want sex.

Our Lara is dead.

I'll pretend to be Lara for you.

Stop tainting our memory of Lara!

I want sex.

Life is so depressing.

I want sex.

We hate being dead.

I want sex.

How many times do we have to kill ourself before we stay dead!

I want sex.

Why does everyone hate us!

I want sex.

Can you not see we are trying to have a psychotic breakdown here?

I want sex.

Go have sex with Auberon.

I want sex with you.

Leave us alone!

I want sex.

You evil spawn of Creaganon!

I want sex.

You stole Lara from us!

I want sex.

Give us back Lara's blood!

I want sex.

You stole her blood from us!

I want sex.

We want Lara!

I want sex.


I am gonna rape you and you can't stop me so there! Nanananana! Look I've got a pussy! 



Wow... uhm... so you think Ciri might want to have sex?

... meanwhile in Avallac'h's psychotic breakdown....

If there's anything that Chapter 5 of Lady of the Lake teaches us, other then Avallac'h's morbidly depressed and on the verge of mental breakdown, it's that Ciri wants to have sex... with Avallac'h... really, really, REALLY bad, and she's not gonna take no for an answer, because she about to turn into SexZillia and kill you for refusing to have sex with her.

So, because Avallac'h can't have sex, he dresses Ciri up like the slutty whore we always knew she was and drags her to King Auberon... 

Here this crazy child won't stop trying to have sex with us, fuck her and get it out of her system.

I don't want to have sex with a human.

Have sex with her right now.

I don't want to.

She wants sex.

I don't care.


Get her away from me.

We want a baby!

You're insane, I'm not giving you any more babies!

She stole Lara Dorren's blood!

Crevan you need a tranquilizer!

We want to watch you fuck her!

She's 12 years old.

If you don't have sex with her of your own free will, we are gonna fill your wine with so much fisstech, you won't know we are forcing her on you!

I'm a lesbian. One of you bastard male elves better start fucking me right now, or I'll prove how lesbian I am by killing every man in this palace and you can't stop me so there! Nanananana! Look I've got a pussy! Let me fluffer it for you dear reader for no reason at all.


I told you, you wanted to have sex with me!


Crevan, just fuck her and get it over with.

NO! We command you to fuck this child for us right now!

She's your problem, you fuck her!


Really, your erection says otherwise.


You can't give me orders.


I'm your king!

We are your GOD! 

I don't believe in you anymore.


She looks like my wife Shandel who you murdered to make your damned precious Lara!

We are your creator, we command you to have sex with this child right now or we shall resurrect your dead wife and kill her again!

I'm gonna stick my dripping wet 12 year old pussy in the reader's face for no reason at all while you guys fight, and you can't stop me so there! Nanananana! 

Where the hell is my fisstech?

Here we have plenty. Let's both take it.... what the hell are you snorting it for, you're supposed to shove it up your dick, like we do. Here, let us show you how it's done.

Hey, King Auberon, old buddy pal, sorry to interupt your daily homoerotic sex orgy with the Knowing One, I'm black Eredin, you think I can take Avallac'h's gold nugget here that he plucked from a dung heap on a picnic with me, I most certainly am not going to try to rape her while the two of you argue over who doesn't want to have sex with her the most...

Oh boy! A male Elf who wants to have sex with me. Now I can prove how much of a lesbian I am, even if he is black, and you can't stop me, so there! Nanananana!

You evil spawn of Creaganon! Don't you dare have sex with that black Elf! He isn't part of us! Just look how black he is! He doesn't have our Elder Blood in him! We shall kill everyone if you have sex with him! You are not tainting Lara's pure white blood with Eredin's evil black sperm! AUBERON DO SOMETHING, BLACK EREDIN JUST RAN OFF WITH LARA'S BLOOD!

Ooooh, look at all the pretty rainbows...


Whaaa?? ...oooh... I think I took too much fisstech again.


Here, while they aren't listening, this is that poisoned fisstech Avallac'h kills people with, you give it to Auberon while I take down The Knowing One.

Wait... I thought you wanted to have sex with me?

Yeah, yeah, later, we got a king and a mad scientist to kill first.

But I want to have sex!

Sure, after we kill Auberon and Avallac'h. I'm black so I have to murder people.

I want sex!

We got to eradicate the Elder Blood!

.... wait... is King Auberon a clone of Avallac'h too?

*PSST* Ciri, it's me again! That unicorn you keep ignoring. You know the unicorn who keeps telling you to run away. Look! Black Eredin's got a knife, grab it and go castrate The Fox, that'll end all of this. You're trapped in this crazy LSD sex fantasy of his. You got to castrate him to get out of here. I'll be waiting for you at his lab, it's easy to find, just take a left at the pile of dead pregnant woman, it's two roads past the the stack of ten thousand human heads, just to the right of the sea of entrails. Once you castrate him that barrier will come done, the gateway to your world is right over his lab. Once the barrier is down I can get you out of here.

But... I didn't have sex with anyone yet!

We don't have time for that, we gotta get you home!

But I don't want go home! I want to rape Avallac'h! 

We don't have time for that!

Yes we do! Just you wait and see! I'm going to rape Avallac'h before I castrate him, and then I'll meet you his lab and we can go home.

Hey look we are on page 178... page 179 is the very next page! Yay you!

So we have 20 pages of Ciri having a sexual awakening, while Avallac'h has a nervous breakdown, and Auberon gets higher then everyone.... everyone is running around naked, lesbisnism is being sterotyped horrifical on extreme anti-gay levels, white power black bashing is being preached every other sentence,  and all the war protesting male Elves have hair down to their knees and are striping naked because apparently this is really the novelized version of the 1960's hippie musical Hair.

Also you may have noticed in my writing this... I have not put any name tags or punctuation with the dialogue lines... that's because the dialogue in the Witcher novels never tells you who is talking and you have to guess at who you think might be talking right now, because this is apparently an avant garde literary novel written in a pretentious experimental nonstandard use of grammar just to prove the author is more intelligent then you dear simplition reader.

And why does Chapter 5 of Lady of the Lake read like it was a hippie love in from the 1970s?

I mean...look at the rape scene...

Bates psycho 12 year old [female Clockwork Orange  is violently rapeing  grandpappy [Gene Wilder nervous breakdown, while king way too high on LSD sits there blowing bubbles, as racial stereotype buddy black boy murders people, and the entire sadist town from  Shirley Jackson's The Lottery and The Weeping Angels gather to watch in a technicolour rape scene that's like something straight out of that weird Elton John X-rated Porn movie *(Tommy)* that most people forgot he made and that I totally didn't watch when I was only 10 year old. Andrzej Sapkowski plagiarized the rape scene from Tommy, didn't he? 

Need video footage to remind you what those things are? Here, have some NSFW video footage.

And why does Chapter 5 of Lady of the Lake read like it was a hippie love in from the 1970s?

I mean...look at the rape scene...

Bates psycho 12 year old female Clockwork Orange  is violently rapeing  grandpappy [Gene Wilder nervous breakdown, while king way too high on LSD sits there blowing bubbles, as racial stereotype buddy black boy murders people, and the entire sadist town from  Shirley Jackson's The Lottery and The Weeping Angels gather to watch in a technicolour rape scene that's like something straight out of that weird Elton John X-rated Porn movie *(Tommy)* that most people forgot he made and that I totally didn't watch when I was only 10 year old. Andrzej Sapkowski plagiarized the rape scene from Tommy, didn't he? 

And people wonder why I have page 179 memorized... really?

Have you ever read that page?

It's like the orgasm of the entire series on one page.

If you've never seen the movie Tommy before, and you can get a hold of the rare Euro imported uncut edition of the dvd - beware the rape scene in it. Most copies of it are not the X-Rated version, the uncut version is fairly hard to find.

If you don't know Tommy, it's also known as The Pinball Wizard, featuring the song by the same name... that deaf,dumb, blind kid in the song... went deaf, dumb, and blind as a result of being brutally raped. I wonder how many people would still like that song if they ever saw the movie it came from?

And if any of my viewers ever wondered how old I am... I saw Hair back when it was released... not the movie - the stage play that the movie was based on - and all I can remember is naked people with long Hair singing the word HAIR over and over again.

You know, given that Andrzej Sapkowski is my age and he thus grew up with the same era of media I did, I wonder if half the reason I like the Witcher novels is just because he plagiarized so many things I remember growing up watching and reading, so the Witcher novels are just non-stop nostalgia for me?

Back to Ciri and Avallac'h in Chapter 5 of Lady of the Lake...

So we have 20 pages of Ciri having a sexual awakening, while Avallac'h has a nervous breakdown, and Auberon gets higher then everyone, except maybe Avallac'h's dick, you know because Ciri's in the room.... everyone is running around naked, shoving fisstech in places you didn't want to know you could shove fisstech.... but all the male Elves have hair down to their knees and flowers in their, because apparently this is really the novelized version of the 1960's hippie love-in drug-feast sex musical Hair, with a rape scene from the 1970s porn musical Tommy, staring the 12 year old female version of Alex from The Clockwork Orange.

And... speaking of hair...  you know Avallac'h has 4 foot long platinum blond hair in the novels right? And Ciri is as obsessed over his Rapunzel hair as much as she does his David Bowie pants.

Also the novels tell us that Avallac'h and Ciri could pass for twins, they looked exactly alike. She was after all his clone.

Likewise... in the novels, Avallac'h 221 cm (7 feet 3 inches) tall and weighing 35 stone (490 lbs)... this guy is HUGE... he's a giant... you know how big Ge'els is in the game? Avallac'h in the novels is BIGGER.

So... forget what Avallac'h looks like in the game, because in the novels he is:

* Avallac'h is 221 cm (7 feet 3 inches) tall 

* Avallac'h weighs 35 stone (490 lbs)

* we are told that he is anorexic and VERY skeletally thin as a result

* he has long sharply pointed ears that are said to be quite different from the small slightly pointed ears of the other Elves

* Avallac'h has no canine teeth 

* Avallac'h has 4 foot long platinum blond hair and slanted/Asian aquamarine eyes, high cheekbones, and a pointed triangular jawline

* Avallac'h wears skin tight black leather pants that could actually be black body paint; thigh high black leather boots, over the elbow black leather gloves, a black leather whip hung from his hip, and a long floor dragging red silk tunic with a high neck collar and hundreds of tiny black buttons with only the top button buttoned leaving his bare chest exposed... over which he wore a massive fur cloak made of fox tails that doubled as the blanket on his bed

* and the only tatoo mentioned is the green dragonfly on his left butt cheek

What does Ciri look like in the novels? NOT A THING like she does in the game.

* Ciri has very long brilliant golden blond hair that gleamed like the sun, when it was brushed straight, 

* but usually Ciri's hair was dreadlocks that hung to her bum and were rolled in ashes so their colour could not be determined and she as called "The Ashen Haired Maid" not because of the colour of her hair, but because of the ASHES AND SOOT in her hair.

* Ciri has brilliant, clear, enthreal, sky blue eyes

* in early novels she is described as have ONYX (black) skin

* the 6th novel Tower of Swallows, we are told she has white skin that is painted black with a paste made of lard, ashes, and fisstech

* in the 6th and 7th novels we are told that Ciri is VERY fat, VERY obese and has a BEER BELLY so big that people thought she was 8 months pregnant, she was described as rolly-polly and looking gloutenous 

* from Avallac'h we get a lustful description of her very fat belly and learn that Avallac'h is a chubby chaser and finds skinny women repulsive and likes Ciri better then any other female he's ever seen because she's the fattest female he's ever seen

* most people who meet Ciri described her as ugly and or hideous 

* she was often mistaken for a boy because of her very flat chest and a total lack of any boobage at all

* her face is NEVER described, until her face gets cut off and which point we are told only a few strips of flesh hung from the bone and she could not be identified as human

* in the 7th novel Lady of the Lake we are told that when she met Avallac'h is was like looking in a mirror before losing her face and that he and she could have passed for identical twins

* Ciri wore a long black skirt that was slit on both sides all the way to the waist band, no panties underneath, wears no top at all, wears a sheer  scarf around her neck that sometimes but not often covers her nipples, and has a rose tattoo on her inner thigh

So... forget everything the game told you Ciri and Avallac'h looked like because in the novels they looked absolutely NOTHING like their game renditions

Plus there were some weird changes the game made to these characters like:

* In the novels Ciri and Avallac'h are married. Ciri is Avallac'h's wife; Avallac'h is Ciri's husband

* While the game Witcher 3 shows them living together, the game never tells you that Ciri and Avallac'h are married (however the game Witcher 1 did tell you they were married)

* In the novels Avallac'h had a crippling phobia of swords, that was so over the top it defied logic; we see him refuse to speak to any one carrying a sword; we see him snap his fingers and poof Geralt's sword to who knows where before he'll agree to let Geralt in his house

* yet in the game we see Avallac'h carrying a sword

* In the novels Avallac'h is a mute who speaks via high pitched whale songs, trilling whistles, and twittering bird chirps

* In the game, Avallac'h can talk with a normal humanoid voice just like anyone else

* In the novels, Avallac'h can change the frequency of his whale songs to super high sonic levels, using his vocal chords as a deadly weapon that explodes brains inside the heads of everyone for miles around, can blow up buildings, can crumble mountains, and when wounded and unable to do the sonic scream, he can use his mind to make his female bodyguards to the scream for him

* In the game, we see Ciri do the sonic whale scream... something we were directly told in the novels, she could not do, because she had only 1/1,000 of Lara's powers and Lara couldn't do it because Lara didn't have 1/1,000 of Avallac'h's powers.

* In the novels, Avallac'h could not understand Human languages and was unable to communicate with Humans, which caused him to believe Humans were not intelligent and not sentient, as he thought their language was nothing but gibberish; He marveled when discovering Geralt and Ciri could speak Elvish and thought of them as advanced specimens of evolution

* In the game Avallac'h has no trouble understanding and communicating with Humans

* In the novels we are told Avallac'h is Master Mirror, the Merchant of Glass, a Mirror Mage who used mirrors to travel through time, travel through space, control people's minds, and change history.

* In the game, Gaunter O'Dimm (a character who was not in the novels) is Master Mirror and does all the things Avallac'h did in the novels.

* In the novels we are told that Avallac'h is not really an Elf but rather a giant serpent the size of a planet who can shapeshift into any form and has taken the form of an imaginary Elf that Ciri made up and had sexual fantasies about; being a psion he can read Ciri's thoughts and takes on any form that Ciri wants him to have, so we later see him in a human form using the name The Fisher King

* In the novels Avallac'h wears a pendant that is the shape of a serpent eating its tail; it is cursed and binds him into an Elf form and prevents him from using his full powers; originally Starry Eyes the Unicorn controls it and keep Avallac'h a prisoner in Avalon; later after Starry Eyes' death Ciri controls the pendent and Avallac'h, as The Fisher King, is Ciri's servant/slave

* In the game Avallac'h wears a scarab beetle pendant, and is obeying Ciri's every whim, but the game never tells us why he wears it or why he obeys her without question

* In the novels the Druids of Skellige guarded a mystical cave, that had appeared during the Conjunction of Spheres; The Unseen Elder God lived in this cave and they worshiped him and protected him. Geralt enters the cave and learns that The Unseen Elder God is an Elf named Avallac'h who is also called The Knowing One ... later Regis and other vampires invaded the cave intending to kill The Knowing One, but Avallac'h had already fled.

* In the game the cave is in Toussaint, and the Unseen Elder is NOT Avallac'h but rather a powerful vampire whom Regis regarded as his king.

* In the novels Avallac'h was a skilled archer, an expert in horsemanship, a helmsman with several boats, a poet who had written volumes of poetry, a painter, a flutists, and a fisherman.

* None of Avallac'h's careers, pastimes, or hobbies are mentioned in the game 

* In the novels Avallac'h was a genetics scientist, built a lot of clones including his prize creation Lara Dorren, he had walls of science and medical degrees for colleges, schools, and universities from all over the universe in every time period possible, making him the most advanced healer/physician/scientist in the universe

* The game mentions none of that

* In the novels Ciri was the main character, Yennefer was the secondary character, and Geralt was an afterthought who was only Mommy Yennefer's boyfriend who showed up once in a while.

* In the games Geralt was the main character, Triss was the secondary character, Yen was barely mentioned, and Ciri and Yen appear only briefly in the final game.

* In the novels, there was this slutty little girl who got seriously burned in a fire and was horribly disfigured to the point she dressed like a real world fundamentalist Muslim and you only ever saw her brilliant blue eyes, a few strands of her long brown hair, and had no clue what she looked like. The one scene when she lets you see her skin, she is burned so badly that you can not recognize her as being human. She appears on about 8 pages, mentioned barely in passing. The only thing of importance she ever did was drug Geralt's drink then rape him. Her name was Triss Merigold.

* In the first 2 games Triss is practically the main character getting more cutscenes then Geralt, and is the primary love interest of Geralt in all 3 games. 

* In the novels, Avallac'h was an incredibly minor character appearing on only 32 pages and he had more on page time then what was her name again? Oh yeah, Triss Merigold.

* The games were clearly made by Triss fanboys who made her front and center of all 3 games and dramatically fan-ficed the hell out of her, removing her disfiguring burns, changing her eyes to green, changing her hair to red, and giving her a slutty revealing wardrobe that the real, incredibly modest burka wearing Triss of the novels wouldn't be caught dead in.

* In the novels, magic was not widely believed in, and there were fewer than 20 mages known to exist in the entire universe. Only 2 of those mages were male: a human named Vilgizfort's and an Elf named Avallac'h, though Avallac'h was not actually a mage, but rather was a medical scientist from the future, who's healing skills seemed so miraculous that the medieval world dubbed him a sorcerer.

* In the games we see multiple hundreds of mages. In the scene when Triss rescues the mages of Novigrad, we see 32 mages just in that one city - 12 more mages then existed in the entire universe in the novels.

* In the novels, Avallac'h WAS NOT A MAGE and was only called that because he was from 5,000 years in the future and people of the medieval past could not comprehend his seemingly miraculous ability to heal people, thus he was incorrectly called a sorcerer, which infuriated him every time someone called him that

* In the game he's a mage and his advanced medical science knowledge from the future is ignored completely and never mentioned

* In the novels, Avallac'h was a boiling, bubbling well of emotions. Hyper active, singing, dancing, and jumping around on tables, beds, and chair one minute, then raving, ranting, screaming, and throwing things the next minute. He switched emotions back and forth constantly, jumping to extreme ends of emotional spectrums in seconds. He was very bio-polar and suffered from manic depression, and was a nervous breakdown waiting to happen.

* In the game Avallac'h is calm, quiet, and collected, every bit as robotic and emotionlessly stoic as Ciri was in the novels. He rarely showed any emotions at all. This is the complet total opposite of his ADHD hyper manic emotional state in the novels.

* In the novels, among the many careers Avallac'h was listed as having, he was also a male stripper, and we saw him dancing around on tables, with the narration being fully focused on his crotch.

* In the game, you'd never guess Avallac'h was anything other then a very obsessive mage.

* In the novels Ciri could easily be removed and replaced with a robot or a zombie and you wouldn't notice. She is emotionally dead and you can't get from one page to the next without expecting her to be revealed to actually be a robot.

* In the game, Ciri actually shows emotions. We even see her smile in one scene and laugh in another. WOW!

* In the novels Avallac'h invented portals, and EVERY portal EVERYWHERE on EVERY  planet was built by him, at the expense of a lot of lives as EVERY TIME a portal is used, it requires killing a unicorn and draining it's blood in order to activate and power the portal

* In the novels we are told only 3 people can open portals: Avallac'h, Starry Eyes, and Yennefer

* In the novels we are told only 2 people can travel through time and space: Avallac'h and a unicorn named Starry Eyes

* Starry Eyes is never mentioned in the game, even though in the novels he was a primary main character with more page time then Yennefer, Triss, Shani, Dandelion, Regis, and Phillipa combined.

* In the game, Ciri tells Geralt that Avallac'h spent 400 years studying portals and can only find and pass through existing ones; completely ignoring the fact that the novels told use he invented portals, built every single portal out there and is 1 of only 3 people who has ever successfully used a portal

* In the novels, Ciri keeps falling through portals; in the 7th novel it's revealed that Avallac'h was putting portals in her path trying to get her to his palace in Avalon; we are specifically told Ciri has no ability to travel through time or space and can only do so when she jumps into a portal that Avallac'h, Starry Eyes, or Yennefer opened for her

* In the game we are told Ciri has the power to travel anywhere at will, just by thinking about it

* In the novels, because unicorns are humans who can shapeshift into horses, NO ONE other than Avallac'h and Yennefer ever use or open portals

* In the game every mage knows how to use portals and all it takes is the snap of a finger and repeating a phrase in Elvish to activate them

* In the game, non-mages can activate portals with power crystals

* In the novels Yennefer is a Grave Hag that is 1/4 Elf, and therefore has no pity, sympathy, or connection to humans, ths why she, like Avallac'h, has no issue slaughtering unicorns and draining their blood to power and activate a portal

* In the novels, Yennefer uses a paste made of Lilac and Gooseberries to cast an illusion spell that changes what she looks like so no one knows she is a a Grave Hag that is 1/4 Elf

* In the game we are told Yennefer smells like lilac and gooseberries, has a dead unicorn in her bedroom, and one character asks Geralt if she is part Elf, but other then that we are never told she is not human or that she mass murders unicorns in order to cast her black magic blood spells

* In the novels Sage was another word for Psion - a type of psychic with the ability to use telepathy and mind control. He is called The Knowing One, because he can read, see, and hear the thoughts of everyone on the planet, on other planets, and can see the thoughts from both the past and future as well

* The game calls him a Sage, and in one line Geralt hints to the fact that Avallac'h is a mind reader, but otherwise his being a Psion is completely overlooked

* In the novels we are told that Avallac'h is ancient, older than history, older than time, that he not only created time, he created the universe, was God, was time, and had full control of how fast or slow time moved

* In the game, Avallac'h's time controlling abilities are given to Gaunter O'Dimm, also known as G.O.D. a game only character who was created for Hearts of Stone dlc because they didn't want to use Avallac'h in both games, but also wanted to use his Time Controlling Elder God backstory

* Because of Avallac'h's ability to slow the passage of time - 12 year old Ciri lives with him for 8 years, but is still 12 years old when she is returned home and finds that back home only 8 days have passed

* Two years later, at the age of 14, Ciri returns to Avallac'h and marries him, then lives with him for 10,500 years, but upon returning to her own time finds that only 21 years have passed

* Even though 21 years have passed the game tells us that only 3 years have passed, and though Ciri is now 10,500 years old, the game tells us that she is 16 or 33 depending on if you have an American edition or not

* Ciri in the novels, underwent the mutations

* In the game we are told Ciri DID NOT undergo the mutations

* In the novels, because of her Elder Blood Ciri did not mutate immediately, her body transforming slowly over time; but she never noticed the change until 10,500 years later when one day she discovered she had fins and fish scales and had mutated into a Dryad Fish Person, at which point she began calling herself The Lady of the Lake

* While The Fisher King and his wife The Lady of the Lake both appear in both Witcher 1 and Witcher 3 games, we are never told that they are Ciri and Avallac'h in their future forms 

* Ciri in the novels HAD NO POWERS. No one trained her to use her powers because she had NO POWERS to use.

* Ciri in the game has all sorts of powers and everyone wants her to train so she can use them and tap into them.

* Ciri in the novels had the gifts of dreams and visions. She constant dreams horrific nightmares of everyone she knew being brutally murdered. She lived in a time and place when people didn't have dreams, so dreams where seen as "bad" and because she had dreams, everyone wanted to kill her.

* In the game dreams are nothing special and Ciri doesn't have any.

* In the novels The White Cold was an ancient prophecy that foretold of the Continent (home of Skellige, Vizima, Nilfgaard, etc) being buried in snow.

* In the game the White Frost is a galactic space illness that kills planets with massive blizzards

* In the novels Avallac'h was a doomsday preacher, a self-proclaimed prophet and priest. His thousands of mirrors showed him that the Northern Realms of Ciri's planet would be buried in snow killing all life.

* In the novels Eredin did not believe in the White Cold and thought Avallac'h was a raving lunatic.

* In the novels, Avallac'h was building a massive Noah's Ark style boat which he planned to take to Geralt & Ciri's planet, and use to rescue all the monsters, plants, animals, and people (elves, humans, Gnomes and other non-humans) and bring them to live with him on the Lake of Avalon on his planet.

* In the game, the White Frost is killing the Aen Elle planet, so the elves, lead by Eredin are trying to evacuate to Geralt and Ciri's planet and need Ciri's super powers to do so, and are killing the humans to get her.

* In the novels, the Aen Elle planet is said to be the safe haven from the White Cold.

* In the novels, Avallac'h is unique... the ONLY sage ever born.

* In the game, we see mention of many, many, manny sages.

* In the novels a sage is a type of psion - a psychic with an insanely overpowered brain, able to see the future, see the past, move objects with their mind, control the will and actions of others,  speaks with telepathy. Avallac'h is the only one ever known to have been born and everyone in the universe is terrified of him because of it.

* In the game sage is just the elven word for archmage or wizard

* In the novels Avallach, because he is a sage, is considered the most powerful and most feared being in all the universe. Like Voldemort in Harry Potter, Avallac'h is the one who's name no one dare say, thus Avallac'h is referred to only as The Knowing One, The Ancient One, The Elder God, or The Ancient Unseen Elder

* In the game Avallac'h is just yet another mage

* In the novels, Ciri was kidnapped by Geralt and tortured by Vesmire; she felt nothing and cared nothing for either of them, likewise they felt nothing and cared nothing for her. Geralt and Vesimire were just 2 more men in a long list of men who brutally tortured and sexually abused Ciri

* In the game Ciri and Geralt have a daddy/daughter relationship; Geralt thinks of Vesimire has his dad; and Ciri calls Vesmire her uncle

* In the novels Ciri was a Kaer Morhen for fewer than 90 days, not even 3 months; and she was tortured while she was there; no one trained her

* In the game, Ciri supposedly trained at Kaer Morhen and lived there long enough to form strong bonds with the witchers, and long enough to become an expert swordsman

* In the novels Ciri DID NOT ASPIRE TO BECOME A WITCHER; she didn't even like the witchers and Geralt was nothing to her but Mommy Yennefer's boyfriend

* In the game Ciri's dream is to become a Witcher, she thinks of Geralt as daddy, and trains with him

* In the novels, Avallac'h, who has a massively crippling phobia of swords, has a fancy silver sword named Zireal made for Ciri to prove to her that he is a friend and to show her she is not his prisoner; he tells her if she ever feels scared of him, she can use it to kill him, and she later uses it to blackmail him, terrifying him into submission so that she can rape him; she also castrates him with that same sword

* In the game we see Geralt have the exact same sword made and give it to Ciri to brand her "a real witcher".

* In the novels Avallac'h calls Ciri an unruly child, finds this repulsive and tries to train her unruliness out of her so she can be presented as a Lady in his palace on the Lake of Avalon

* In the game Vesmire is the one who calls Ciri an unruly child, using it as her nickname

* In the novels, the child of the elder blood was Ciri's baby, not Ciri herself, Ciri was the MOTHER of the child of the Elder Blood

* In the game, Ciri is the child of the Elder Blood and her baby with Avallac'h is never mentioned

* In the novels, Ciri's baby with Avallac'h was supposed be to grow up to be a demi-god because both its parents were elder bloods; but the novels end before that ever happens

* In the game, both Ciri's romantic relationship with avallac'h and her baby by him are never mentioned at all and Cri, not her baby is a demigod

* Ciri and Avallac'h are a couple in the novels and the series ends with Ciri marrying Avallac'h and living with him on the Lake of Avalon

* In the novels we see Ciri and Avallac'h living together, sleeping in the same bed together, and being very erotic and sexual with each other

* In the game it's unclear what kind of relationship Ciri has with Avallac'h, with him being called her mentor, tutor, teacher, and advisor

* In the novels, Ciri is madly in love with Mistle, but Mistel dies and so Ciri takes comfort in Avallac'h's bed forming a strong emotional, sexual, and romantic bond with him, becoming his lover

* In the game, Mistle is never mentioned and while Ciri's being in love with Avallac'h is hinted to, this aspect of her is never explored

* In the novels, Avallac'h is the only one of his kind, is very lonely and desperately wants a mate, so clones himself to create a 2ns one of his own kind so that he can have a companion; he names her Lara Dorren and marries her and raises her, but she grows up to think of him as her father not her husband, leaving him still alone and broken hearted

* In the game Lara Dorren is a "chosen one" a child of mystical birth, and Avallac'h seen as an obsessed stalker who studies her blood to figure out what she is; the game makes no mention of Avallac'h building her or her being his clone

* In the novels Avallac'h is an Aen Serveine Elf - the only one known to exist, no one knows where he came from, he does not remember having any parents, he just suddenly appeared out of nothing one day; and he is very, very, lonely and his only goal is for there to be a female of his species, so he can have a mate and raise a family like everyone else; because there is no one else of his species he starts cloning himself to create a family so he won't be alone any more

* In the game, Avallac'h is a just another Aen Elle Elf; driven by unidentified seemingly power driven motives, Avallac'h breeds powerful Elves trying to create a race of super-beings

* In the novels Avallac'h is so desperate for a family that he starts hoarding up hundreds of wives, and while he treats them lovingly, lavishing them with everything, none of them love him and are only with him for his massive wealth; this deepens his depression; 

* In the novels Avallac'h is assexual and never has sex with any of his wives, and when Ciri tries to have sex with him, Avallac'h acts like a terrified virgin who is scared of sex

* In the game, it is made to look like Avallac'h is cheating on Ciri with Isillira, an Elven prostitute from Crippled Kate's Brothel (the woman in the pink dress whom is found both at the brothel and in his lab)

* In the novels, Ciri and Avallac'h are planning to have a baby, but because of his fears surrounding sex, Avallac'h is too scared to have sex with Ciri and sends her to King Auberon for sex instead, so Ciri can have a baby through the king

* In the game, Ge'els acusses Avallac'h of blackmailing Ciri, forcing her into the king's bed

* In the novels, Ciri was a sex crazed lustful horn dog and Avallac'h barely had to suggest she have sex with someone else before Ciri was joyfully, and giddily rushing off to have sex with the King whom she lusted after; we see Avallac'h emotionally and mentally torn up over Ciri's joyful reaction to cheating on him; 

* In the novels we see the King sadisticly cuckolding Avallac'h, enjoying emotionally torturing Avallac'h by seducing Ciri; Ciri nightly leaves Avallac'h's bed to cheat on him with the king, and the king takes to sexually molesting Ciri in front of Avallac'h

* In the novels we see Avallac'h making poisoned fisstech and wanting to kill the king for stealing Ciri from him; we see Eredin overhear this and steal the poisoned fisstech, then give it to Ciri telling Ciri to kill the king; later the king is found dead from the poisoned fisstech and Eredin is genuinely shocked by this stating he did not do it; Eredin accuses Avallac'h of framing him for the king's murder

* In the game we see Avallac'h accusing Eredin of killing the king, but refusing to say how he knows this

* In the game, Avallac'h has Miss Tilly dream the king's death, but we see him (a psion with mind altering abilities) touch her forehead and link his mind to hers, changing her actual dream to show Eredin kill the king; we never see what the actual dream was

* In the novels Avallac'h is madly in love with his  ex-wife Lara Dorren and can not come to terms with the fact that she left him for a human; after Lara's brutal murder Avallac'h becomes obsessed with Ciri believing she is Lara reincarnated/reborn because Ciri could pass for Lara's twin

For such a little used minor character, Avallac'h had a HUGE backstory and a hell of a lot of over development.

Ironically, Ciri was the main character and was very sallow, underdeveloped, and didn't have nearly as much backstory in her 4,000 pages as Avallac'h had in his 32 pages.

This was the case with MOST of the Witcher characters. The minor characters who appears often in only a single chapter or even just single page, where often very well developed with lots of thought and effort put into their creation, leaving the one shot wonders of the series as very relatable and realistic...

...While the main characters themselves: Ciri, Geralt, Yennefer, Triss, etc, were flat, cookie cutter, shallow, and had no backstory or character development at all. Leaving them often unrealistic and unrelatable.

It is sad that Andrzej Sapkowski didn't put as much effort into the creation of his main characters as he did his 5,000+ minor characters.

And Avallac'h can be more annoying then Ciri when he wants to throw himself a pity party and prove how insane, I mean intelligent, he is.

Avallac'h and Ciri go good together... they BOTH act like undisciplined snot nosed, whiny, annoying toddlers in desperate need of a good spanking and a time out in the corner.

That Avallac'h has the scientific ability to be a mad genius is without question... but we really have to question if he has any intellect in anything outside of science.

His serious lack of social skills mirrors Ciri's serious lack of emotions. He's as borderline retarded as Ciri is, when it comes to intellectual conversation. That he's a hermit who has only has his own brain to talk to for the last 200 years is PAINFULLY OBVIOUS when he tries to prove how smart he is in a conversation with a 12 year old sex crazed retard like Ciri and comes off just as retarded as she is.

Also, when you do get to page 179... it's weird. There's a lot going on. Ciri's raping Avallac'h... the king is watching while blowing bubbles... Eredin's killing the king while Avallac'h's distracted... it's actually a rather histerical scene if it wasn't so disturbing. It's hard to not laugh while reading the rape scene and be horrified at the same time...

You got to pity King Auberon here. Can you imagine what his daily life is like:

What's on the agenda today?

Well, Sire, the general of your army poisoned your food again today. We'll have to find another food tester for you. They die so often.

So, what else is new?

Also your court mage is fighting with that human brat of his again, Sire. He wishes to speak with you.

Oh, Gods, what does he want now? Why won't he leave me alone? I need a drink... what the hell am I drinking?

It's bubble solution, Sire. Look, there's even a bubble wand.

Where is my wine?

I'm afraid there is no more wine, Sire.

What do you mean there's no more wine?

The Knowing One, Sire.

What the hell did he do now!

He turned all the alcohol in the Tir ni Lia to bubble solution, Sire.

By the gods, why?

He says the wine is affecting your ability to fuck the child, Sire.

You tell him, I'm not fucking that damned human child of his. I HATE Humans!

Yes, Sire. I did, Sire. He told me I was acting like Cregagonon then turned my wife into a toad, Sire. 

Oh by the gods, send them in here.

What are you two fighting about today?

He won't have sex with me!

She stole our blood!

You pointy eared mage!

We are not a mage! We are a scientist!

My brain is smarter than your brain!

You savage spawn of Creaganon!

Fuck me!


He's refusing to give me an orgasm!

She won't give us Lara's blood back!

King Auberon is sitting there blowing bubbles.... Crevan will you stop fighting with everybody? 

She started it!

He won't have sex with me!

Crevan go have sex with her.

YOU'RE supposed to have sex with her!

I'm not having sex with a Human, how many times do I have to tell you that?

I want an orgasm!

We want Lara's baby!

Crevan you're getting too up tight. 


You need to have sex with somebody, it might as well be her.


Lara died centuries ago. You need to get over it. The rest of us did.


You fuck her.

Will one of you fuck me!

You ought to want fuck her Crevan, she looks like Lara.

Yeah, Crevan, he says I look like your Lara, you should want to fuck me!


Just have sex with her, Crevan.


Clearly you need to.


Stop throwing her in my bed.


Lara's dead, Crevan.


You put a baby in her.

Yeah, Crevan, you put a baby in me!

Come blow bubbles with me, Crevan. It'll do you good. Look at all the colours they make as they float through the air.

No, really, that was a scene...Page 177...  Avallac'h doesn't drink and he won't let anyone else drink, either...so he turned the king's wine into bubbles, and then him and Ciri are fighting over orgasms and Lara's blood while Auberon is sitting on his throne blowing bubbles and talking about rainbows... and trying to ignore the fight between his psychotic court mage and the crazy child he's refusing to have sex with.

... and then we get an entire scene of King Auberon on the balcony, blowing bubbles over the river, in between snorting fisstech... lots and lots and lots and lots of fisstech. 

Lots of it. Lots of fisstech. On page 178... 

...and then on page 179 King Auberon strolls back to his courtroom, taking a shortcut through the garden... 

What the hell is my psychotic court mage doing now... 

Oh good, they're finally having sex, now maybe he'll stop throwing her in my bed. I think I'll sit here and watch. 

Wait is she raping him? 

Oh what do I care, at least I won't have to fuck her now. 

Let's blow some more bubbles while she rapes him.

Hey, King old Buddy boy, it's me badly written racial stereotype black skinned Eredin again, I'm here to kill you because killing people is what all we black baddies do... Oh! I see the Knowing One is finally getting it on with that gold nugget of his. Heard he turned all your wine to bubble mix. Here, I just happen to have some wine, that is absolutely totally not poisoned in any way, here, quick drink it while The Knowing One is distracted, before he gets away from her and realizes I'm trying to kill you again. Keep in mind dear reader I'm only trying to kill the King because I have black skin and what we evil black guys do oooooooooh! Boo! I'm black! And the narrator is going to tell you every five seconds that I'm only evil because I was born with black skin. Boga, boga, boga, BOO!

Poor King Auberon... his general is trying to kill him, his court mage is insane and won't stop throwing Ciri in his bed... it's no wonder he takes so much fisstech.

And you know.... one of the things that makes the rape scene so very disturbing is that we see literally 3 dozen people, including the King, stop what they are doing to watch as the King's court mage is being brutally and violently raped *(keeping in mind Ciri has a sword and is not only raping him, but she's also stabbing him and it looks like she's going to kill him)* - he is trying to get away, he is begging for help, and everyone just watches and no one, not one single person tries to do anything to stop this. 

It says something, both about Avallac'h and the society he lived in: that he's probably been pissin

It says something, both about Avallac'h and the society he lived in: that he's probably been pissing off a lot of people, so not only do no one care or feel any need to try to help him, they also were practically cheering Ciri on. 

Hey look! There's a Human raping The Knowing One!

Wow, I can't believe someone finally took him down.

I can't believe he's finally having sex.

The king's got bubbles.

I brought some popcorn.

Hey, why's everyone gathering? What's going on?

Someone's raping The Knowing One!


Yeah, isn't it great!

You think she's gonna kill him?

I hope so.

Do you think we should throw rocks at him while he's down?

You really have to wonder, what the hell has Avallac'h been doing to these people that every single person in the entire city gathers to watch him get raped to death?

In between all of this, we get the single most annoying scene in literary history:

I need Lara's baby, here fuck this child while I go back to my lab have another psychotic meltdown because nobody loves me, everybody hates me.

Are you gonna fuck me tonight?

Nope. I gonna sit here and continue taking my fisstech and pretend Avallac'h did not just toss you in my bed.

Tell me a story then.

Nope, taking fisstech.

Tell my about Avallac'h.

He's insane. You already know that.

Are you gonna talk to me?

Nope. Got more fisstech to take.

Is that a new mirror?

I don't know. He has so many damned mirrors. 

What's this mirror?

Who the hell knows.

Wow! What is this statue?

The Knowing One.


Yep. Take that damned pendent off his neck and that's what he really looks like.

He's a serpent?


He's not an Elf?


What's this mirror?

All the mirrors are his, don't you know that by now?

Why won't you have sex with me?

Why would I have sex with you?

Because I have to have a baby?

Why? Because Avallac'h told you to?

He said he'll send me home to Mommy Yennefer if I have your baby.

And you believed him?

Why wouldn't I?

You ain't ever leaving here. We're all trapped here. No one wants to be here. But he'll never let any of us leave.

But I want Mommy Yennefer.

Yennefer and Geralt are dead. They died 5,000 years ago, along with your whole damned planet. The White Cold killed them. You're the only one who got off that planet alive.

But I want Mommy Yennefer.

She's dead.

But I want Mommy Yennefer.

You want Yennefer. I'll show you Yennefer.  Look in that mirror. There's your Mommy Yennefer. Bloody and gutted. Frozen in the cold and devoured by wolves. That's all that's left of your planet.

But I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I need more fisstech.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I'm proving how retarded I am.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

King AuberonKing Auberon

Wonder where I hid the rest of the fisstech?

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

Kill her Auberon. Please. Kill her.  Please we readers can't stand her annoying whining anymore.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

Do you believe I'm a retard yet.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

Nope. no fisstech here. Under the bed maybe?

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer. I'm gonna throw myself on the floor and hold my breath until you give me Mommy Yennefer.

Steps over idiot child laying on floor holding her breath, while looking for more fisstech. Grabs nearest mirror, smashes it and starts grinding the glass shards into... fisstech?

I want Mommy Yennefer. Why aren't you listening to me? I want Mommy Yennefer. I been holding my breath for the last half hour, because I'm a retard and proving how stupid I am. I want Mommy Yennefer. You better give me Mommy Yennefer or I gonna kill myself, nananananana, you can't stop me so there! I want Mommy Yennefer. Why aren't you listening to me?

Because you're an annoying brat. And you're never leaving here. Because I'm never going to fuck you. You're never gonna have a baby. If you do, it'll be by Avallac'h in his damn lab, and believe me you won't want that. He'll have a baby from you one way or another. You're better off letting him keep sending you here to me forever, because he will. He has all the time in the world. He controls time. He is time. And he can wait forever.

But I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

Starts snorting powdered glass because can't find any more fisstech.

*Uhm.... Ciri... you're whining so much he's snorting ground up glass... can you stop being a selfish snot long enough to see how your sex crazed lunacy is affecting the men around you? One is in his lab slicing his wrists and the other one is snorting ground up glass. Good job, Ciri. You're making all the men around you want to kill themselves.*

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

Look the reader doesn't know how much of a retard I am yet, so I'm gonna keep saying this for the next 5 pages.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.


Wwaaaaaaa! Booo, hoooo, hooo, you scared me! You big mean bully,  I'm going to rape Avallac'h and you can't stop me so there! Nananana!

Ciri runs from the room...

And me, the dear reader, is asking, Auberon you idiot! why didn't you smack that brat upside the head ten times and shut her up? Damn is Ciri the most annoying psycho brat I've ever seen in a book or what?

But I didn't have to wait long for someone to smack her upside the head, because she ran screaming "I want Mommy Yennefer" all the way to page 179 and got her jaw broken and teeth punched out by Avallac'h, who really did not like being raped.

Avallac'h... why did you stop? Please finish what you started. Just kill her. Snap her damned neck. She deserves it. She's mass murdered half the universe. She killed your baby. She raped you. And she's the single most self-centered, egotistical, whiny, annoying brat I've ever seen in a novel. Kill her just so I don't have to listen to her whine anymore. 

Infurtiated that neither Auberon or Avallac'h will have sex with her, Ciri's violent outbursts against both Elves gets worse each day, while she increases her whining and bitching, is laying on the floor holding her breath more often, becomes ten times more annoying then we dear readers thought possible, and causing us dear readers to wonder: is she losing brain cells with every word she says?

Avallac'h tries to calm Ciri down, while also trying not to have a nervous breakdown.

I want Mommy Yennefer. Have sex with me.

We am not having sex with you, we are too busy having a psychotic breakdown. Go back to Auberon and have sex with him.

He won't give me an orgasm.

I want Mommy Yennefer. 

You better fuck me now or I'm gonna kill you.

I want Mommy Yennefer. 

I'm a lesbian, you males better fuck me so I prove how lesbian I am.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

You need patience. Auberon is old and has trouble getting excited over Humans, thus why his reluctance to have sex with you. He will sooner or later. We shall force him on you if he doesn't do it on his own.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

Pretend I'm Lara and have sex with me.

Lara was sweet and good and nothing like you.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

Sex. Sex. Sex. Horses don't care who they have sex with.

We pray you didn't say that to Auberon, you vile perverted spawn of Creagagon.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

You said I looked like Lara.

You certainly don't act like her. Lara was refined and intelligent. A Lady. Not a braindead barbaric savage like you. You never stop acting like Creaganon long enough to act like Lara.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I can be Lara

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.


I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I'm a broken record.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

I want Mommy Yennefer.

Stop being an unruly child, you're interrupting our psychotic breakdown.


We do not hate you.


We wouldn't have sex with Lara either. We are asexual. We do not have sex with any body.


Sex is not love. Why can't you stupid sex crazed females understand that?

And Avallac'h tells Ciri information similar to what he had previously told Geralt, about his sexual experiments, with him adding that he's asexual, he's got no interest in sex, he never has, not even with Lara. 

He admits part of the reason Lara cheated on him was because he had no interest in having sex at all and Lara was very sexual so started having sex with first other elves, then with humans, and eventually got pregnant by Creagaggon.

We see Avallac'h break down in tears saying he loved Lara but, love was not enough for her, all she wanted was sex and he just wasn't able to do that.

Wait is Avallac'h ever not crying?

He starts crying in every scene.

He found himself unable to understand why Lara wanted sex so badly and could not accept that he really didn't have any interest in sex. He wanted someone to love him, but could only find people who wanted sex from him, which was not what he wanted and what was caused him to be trying to understand why everyone wanted sex so badly... and also trying to understand what was wrong with him that he didn't want sex while everyone else did. 

We see a strange change in Avallac'h's personality, with him acting oddly like a normal person, not being wild, manic, and wait... not even talking in plural third person about himself or his brain anymore.

In this very strange scene we see that everything has been an act... all of it. Avallac'h is a very good actor. This whole thing has been part of that experiment he'd told Geralt about. 

Though the baby part is still true, he needs the baby to restore Lara's stolen blood back into elven bloodlines.

Ciri starts demanding that if Avallac'h wants the baby so bad, the he needs to stop putting the job on others and make the damned baby himself. Then 12 year old Ciri starts ordering Avallac'h to fuck her right now and make her pregnant... while he backs away from her saying over and over again that he can't.

And we see Avallac'h suddenly shy, embarrassed, and flustered, admitting he has no interest in sex, and that without the fisstech, he really couldn't have an erection even if he wanted too. He simply had no libido, no sex drive at all, and he didn't know why, and no matter how much he tried (and boy did we see him do a lot of trying) he simply couldn't get any satisfaction from sex at all... and it was what was driving him out of his mind, because he couldn't understand the attraction to sex and he really wanted to understand what it was that attracted everyone else to sex.

So, fisstech is viagra we learn.

And we see the overly sexual horny 12 year old Ciri becoming more and more violent in every scene, as she demands "FUCK ME NOW!" more and more often.

And we now see too the tables turning as reality hits the reader hard: Ciri NOT Avallac'h is the sex crazed pervert. 

A major revelation is happening here as we are now told that Avallac'h is very powerful psion - a creature with psychic brain powers capable of controlling the will over every person in entire continents. 

He can see and hear every thought for miles and miles around. 

He sees all, hears all, knows all. Thus why people address him as The Knowing One.

No one can hide anything from him.

No one can plot against him, because he already knows what they are thinking.

The only way to defeat him is to get him so distracted that he's no longer focusing on everything around him any more... 

...and what has Ciri been doing ever since his brain called her brain stupid? Distracting him.... more and more and more...

He can move objects with his mind.

He can build planets with his thoughts.

And he built this planet for Ciri... EVERYTHING that has happened since Ciri arrived, happened ONLY BECAUSE Avallac'h saw these things in Ciri's secret innermost fantasies, so he brought to life EVERYTHING she wanted.

Ciri has long loved Elves, but they are so rare, nearly extinct. She's barely ever seen one, She fantasizes and lusts after Elves... thus why the Ancient Elder God, The Knowing One, took on the form of the very Ef Ciri had made up in her mind to fantasize about. Why he created an Elven Kingdom and made all the Elves in it lusting after Ciri.

THIS is what Ciri WANTED.

The world of the Aen Elle Elves, doesn't exist, the Aen Elle went extinct long ago.

This world is all an illusion created by The Knowing One, in an massive attempt to make her love him, the way Lara never did, by giving her absolutely everything she ever wanted.

But there was one flaw in all of this... The Knowing One has no sex drive, seems in fact to very likely to probably also be a virgin, and can't even begin to comprehend what it is Ciri ACTUALLY wants... which is to have sex with an Elf.

And so while everything in this world is overly endlessly sexual, no one is ever actually having sex with her and it's driving her out of her mind.

Avallac'h was just  trying to be what Ciri wanted him to be and he simply can not do what she wants and is tired of trying anymore... maintaining this massive illusion is exhausting him and he can't keep it up much longer.

And Ciri has figured this out, though she hasn't yet realized Avallac'h is not an Elf, and she also has not yet been able to break through the illusion to see what the real planet underneath really looks like, so she has not yet grasped, just how HUGE of a mega sized spell The Knowing One is casting and now struggling to maintain.

Ciri has only one thought on her mind: She is going to have sex with Avallac'h one way or another.

And if he won't have sex with her willingly, then she has to get him so distracted that he can't read her thoughts any more, so she can sneak up on him and rape him.

Thus we see Ciri go hyper sex crazy and do nothing but talk about sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex...

Good god! Can you think of anything more vile and revolting then sex?

It's so obvious the Witcher novels were written by a man, because no female would think to write a female as vile as he wrote Ciri.


Can anything make you want to gag more!



God is Ciri such a piece of shit.


It's horrific!

Ciri is almost as vile, revolting, immoral, and disgusting as Geralt and Dandelion.


God! When is someone gonna take a brick to that shit bitch's vile fucking face?


Ciri is such a vile, gutter scum piece of trash.

A totally immoral shit bitch slut of a whore who does nothing but scream:



Can somebody please shoot that disgusting piece of trash!

And while your at it, just shoot everyone on the planet who has ever wanted to have sex.


Just get rid of the fucking perverted jackasses, so people with actual brains can have some peace and quiet.

Good God!

How long do we have to listen to Ciri's 12 year old whinny, annoying vagina, I mean mouth, scream?

I wish Ciri was real, just so I could kill her.

Good god!


How can anybody stand her! All she cares about is sex.

She's just like any other dime a dozen retard of a slutty assed whore.

All Ciri ever wants to do is toss her ass in the air and scream: "Fuck me!"


How much more retarded can she get!

God! Ciri is so disgusting. I just want to vomit every time I hear her name. She is such a vile, disjusting, lewd pervert. Will SOMEBODY PLEASE kill Ciri and every other vile, disjusting, lewd pervert on the planet! There isn't a single brain cell among them to make them worthy of being alive anyways. 

And can you believe it? Ciri ACTUALLY has 24 MILLION fans!

God how can so many people like her?

How the hell can ANYBODY like her at all?

Think about that.

That means there are 24 MILLION disgusting, pieces of perverted shit out their who are nothing but immoral, debauched gutter trash!

God! I hope I never meet any of them in real life. Could you imagine? Having to breath the same air as those immoral pieces of trash!  It makes me sick just to think of it.

So, back to 12 year old Ciri, throwing her silver lace panties at good, moral, righteous, decent, asexual, virgin Avallac'h, while demanding her have sex with her vile perverted cunt... 

...sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex...

Here just go have sex with the King and leave me alone. I'm used to no woman ever loving me and only wanting me for sex. WHY WILL NO ONE LOVE ME! I'll just make this poisoned fisstech while I have a psychotic breakdown over being asexual and tell Ereiden to give these drugs to you to kill the King after he gets done fucking yet another woman I can't have.

You need to remember here that by this point we have been told several times now that Avallac'h is asexual and has no interest in sex at all.

And by this point Ciri, frustrated by Avallac'h's lack of interest in sex, has been going around asking the other Elves for information about Avallac'h and she has been told by every one of them that he IS NOT AN ELF. Every person she asks, has told her that he is a giant serpent. We are given several Call of Cthulhu references, during these conversation. Ciri is even shown a statue of a giant serpent and told this is a statue of Avallac'h in his true form.

Every time Ciri asks for sex, what does Avallac'h do? He send Ciri off to another elf and tells her: go have sex with him.

And what happens every time? Ciri sits on the elf's bed demanding sex, while the elf is flustered and confused and has no clue what Ciri is asking him to do.

Avallac'h doesn't know what sex is. He has no clue what Ciri is asking him to do. And he's snapping his fingers, creating new elves out of air, telling Ciri to have sex with those elves, so he can figure out what the hell Ciri wants.

This thing is, Ciri herself is refusing to have sex with any of the elves, she just throws her clothes off, jumps on the bed, and starts demanding sex. She never once tries to initiate the actual act of sex.

The problem here is, this entire planet and all of it's people are not real. The Aen Elle Elves went extinct thousands of years ago, and the Elder God has created them and their planet out of images he is seeing in Ciri's head.

There are only 3 living beings on this planet: Avallac'h, Ciri, and Starry Eyes. Everyone else is an illusion.

Did you pay careful attention to Ciri's descriptions of the Aen Elle world?

If you did, you noticed by this point in the chapter that A LOT OF THINGS ARE NOT RIGHT!

* fire burns bright, giving off light, but it does not give off heat

* boats are made out of candy

* boats have no sails and no oars and only move on Avallac'h's command

* water flows in the river, but nothing moves with it - leaves, boats, even a flower Ciri drops n the water, stands still not moving away in the current

* the wind moves trees, but does not feel cold

* the leaves of trees are purple feathers and not leaves

* grass looks like grass, but touching it, it feels like fur

* the sun rises but doesn't set

* the sun sets but doesn't rise

* a single days lasts several years

* night arrives only when Ciri is tired and thinks she should go to bed

* a single night is however long Ciri sleeps; the sun immidialy pops up high noon in the sky as soon as Ciri wakes up regardless of what time it is

* No matter what Ciri is eating, it always tastes like her favorite foods

* there is an island on the lake, a field around the lake, and a barrier around the field, which Avallac'h says is there to prevent Ciri from falling and getting hurt... 

* ...we later realize he means the planet ends there and the barrier is to prevent her from falling through outer space... as we later see the barrier come down and Ciri is sucked into outer space falling through the White Cold

* there are no cities around Avallon, until Ciri says she wants to have sex with the Alder King, and suddenly there is a new citi with another palace sitting there and it wasn't there yesterday 

* flowers never turn into fruit and fruit doesn't actually grow on trees - the apple orchards are always in bloom and apples just always lay on the ground below them, no matter what time of year it is, even in winter

All of this is because Ciri doesn't know everything there is to know about the world, and Avallac'h is building this world for her based off of what he is reading in her memories.

Avallac'h has created this world out of Ciri's memories, but her memories are warped.

He can see what grass looks like, but he can't touch it or feel it, so he made fur growing out of the ground instead of grass. 

He can see water moving, and he knows boats go in water, but he doesn't know the water current moves the boats, he doesn't know wind fills the sails, he doesn't know oars push the boats forward. So he makes boats as though they were beasts of burden, to move on command.

He doesn't understand how day and night works, so it is only dark when Ciri sleeps, and is instantly day again when she is awake.

Avallac'h can make any world he wants. He is a god so creating planets and filling them with life is nothing for him. He just doesn't know enough about the planet Ciri is from to make everything on this planet match up right with how they are on her planet.

Most stuff is right, but a lot of the details are off. He's creating it from looking at pictures and so doesn't know things like fire burns or snow is cold.

And most of all - he doesn't know what sex is. 

And Ciri has never had sex, so he can't look in her memories to find a reference. 

Avallac'h has no clue what Ciri is asking him to do when she asks for sex, so he's making other male Elves for her hoping Ciri will have sex with one of them, so he can figure out what she's talking about, but she she is refusing to have sex with any of them and just keeps demanding they have sex with her, resulting in no one having sex with her, because none of them knows what sex is.

None of the Aen Elle elves are real.

All of the elves are illusions created by Avallac'h.

And Avallac'h doesn't know what sex is, so he doesn't know how to make any of these elves know what sex is either.

Avallac'h is trying to get Ciri to show him what sex is, but all she with do is scream and yell and stamp her feet while demanding: "HAVE SEX WITH ME RIGHT NOW!!!"

Sex makes babies. Avallac'h knows this. But that's all he knows about sex. He's clueless how to actually do it. 

Avallac'h mixes up Ciri's desire for sex as a desire for babies.  And this where all hell breaks lose.

Ciri HATES babies.

Ciri HATES children.

Ciri starts bragging about murdering babies and children.

Cri goes wild saying that if she ever comes to full power the first thing she will do is all all babies, murder all children, and rescue all pregnant women from the parasites that are sucking the life out of them, by forcing all women to have abortions.

Ciri's pro-abortion, kill every child, massacure every baby, eradicate all children 3 page monologue, leave Avallac'h horrified, shocked, and uncertain how to respond. He's so shoken up by Ciri's pro-abortion, kill all babies rant, that he leaves an Ciri spends weeks looking for him.

When she can't find him she asks Erdin where Avallac'h went and Eredin tells Ciri that Avallac'h is the leader of the Wild Hunt and for some unknown reason he had taken the Wild Hunt to the world of Humans and they were kidnapping pregnant women and cutting their fetuses out of them.

Ciri brushes this off as "Oh, okay" without ever once realizing that he's doing this BECAUSE he's trying to make her happy so he's doing everything she says she wants,  including rescuing pregnant women from their unborn babies, like she just got done telling him to do. 

Avallac'h is very much like a Genie or DJinn and Ciri has not yet realized this, though she will, once mommy Yennefer dies, and that's when we will see Ciri in all her true vile, evil villainous glory.

Avallac'h made it very clear he did not want to kill babies. He says this several times throughout Ciri's pro-abortion, baby massacring rant. Ciri wants all babies dead however, the true power of her Elder Blood is NOT that it gives her any power, but rather that it links her to the Elder God in such a way, that he can not disobey her commands. 

Ciri's Elder Blood allows her to control and command a very powerful Elder God, who is bound to obey anyone who has his blood in them.

And through this we see why Avallac'h was so desperate to get back all of Lara's blood no matter who is was in. Because these Elder Bloods can control him, command him, make him do anything they want... which again, Ciri has not yet realized.

It has by this point occurred to Ciri that she has some level of power over Avallac'h and he'll do anything she says, but how she has power over him and why he's obeying her has not yet sunk in, though by now the reader has figured it out.

But the situation is that Ciri is a very selfish, arrogant, cruel minded, sadistic, cold hearted person, who doesn't care about anyone, lives in the moment, thinks nothing of her actions, and revels in the blood pain and suffering of others... and right now her selfish desire is focused 100% on wanting to have sex with an elf.

Avallac'h has mistaken Ciri's desire for sex as a desire to have a baby, so he starts his obsessive baby craze, and comes up with this whole story of how if Ciri gives him a baby, he'll take her to see Mommy Yennefer.

Chapter 5 of Lady of the Lake continues it's mad tea party ride down the rabbit hole as Avallac'h starts tossing Ciri in bed with King Auberon, en Elf who did not exist just an hour ago and Cii hasn't noticed that yet.

Avallac'h is an Elder God and can make people out of nothing. All he has to do is snap his fingers and instantly a baby appears. Thus the act of babies made by sex, eludes him.

So he's napping his fingers and creating male elves for Ciri to have babies with, but not one of them has a sex drive or knows how to have sex with Ciri... 

...and Ciri is clearly too much of a self centered whiny, annoying, retard to stop demanding sex long enough to teach any of these imaginary elves how to have the sex she won't stop demanding they have.

But because none of the Aen Elle Elves are real, none of them knows what to do to Ciri, because none of them knows what sex is, because Avallac'h created all of them and he doesn't know what sex is.

And throughout all of these we see Ciri shoving more and more and more fistech in every opening she's got.

The more Avallac'h refuses to have sex with her, the more crack Ciri starts taking.

She's shoving fistech up her nose, up her vagina, rubbing it on her gums, putting it in her make-up, drinking it in her drinks, bathing in it in her bath water... fisstech is cocaine, Ciri is a crackhead,  and Ciri's drug induced high is starting to crash. 

While the first half of the chapter spirals through the clouds in neon pop art colours, the last half of the chapter plummets into pitch blackness very, very fast.

Ciri's constant demands for sex, come off like a whiny annoying brat as she takes to smashing everything Avallac'h owns, simply because he can't get excited over her while Auberon is flat out refusing to get excited over her.

The bright colored drug filled lunacy of the first half of the chapter starts to fade into bloody red curtains and everything else now being described in 50 different shades of grey as the world goes visibly dark and grim... the weather no longer bright and sunny as dark grey clouds block out the light, birds no longer sing, and... funny how the entire world changes to match Avallac'h's every mode, isn't it...

Ciri have you noticed that this entire planet seems to not be real and is nothing more than an illusion made by a very powerful mage who is madly in love with you and just desperately wants you to love him in return?

And because you won't stop screaming that you want to have sex, suddenly, magically a kingdom with a king name Auberon appeared out of nowhere... you know that city wasn't there yesterday, right?

Ciri.... why can you not see that King Auberon isn't real and can't have sex with you because he is an illusion created by Avallac'h just to get you to stop pestering him to have sex with you.

Ciri... you were TOLD that Avallac'h is THE LAST pure blooded male elf.


He lives in the future, 5,000 years in the future, in a time WHEN ALL NON HUMANS ARE ERADICATED. 


You were also told, that Avallac'h is a WRAITH - he's the GHOST of a very powerful Elven mage - who can't stay dead because he commit suicide - he's a LICH - you know a creature that can never be defeated, will never stay dead,  and ... 


Hey, I wonder what people used to turn Avallac'h into UMA - oh, look a phylactery.... I wonder why they did that?


Ciri... that means EVERY elf you've met on this planet IS NOT REAL

Ciri - you are stuck in a made up world, created by a very powerful and very ancient  Elven Sorcerer Lich King, he's trying very hard to make you happy but he can't have sex with you because he's a wraith and he's getting very, very angry every time your whinny, annoying ass demands he have sex with you.

Pay close attention to the background... every time Ciri demands Avallac'h have sex with her... the world literally starts falling apart... mountain crumble, lightning flashes, rain clouds close in... the world gets darker and more menacing every time Ciri starts screaming she wants to have sex...

Look at the world minutes after the rape scene... we are told that cliffs are crumbling into the sea, rocks are dissolving their illusionary forms vanishing and there true forms being revealed: human skulls, lots of human skulls...

The field of grass become bloody fields of devoured human bodies.

The palace becomes crumbling piles of humans bones.

When Ciri looks at Avallac'h, she for a moment sees a giant serpent, as his illusions are breaking down around him.

Starry Eyes the Unicorn gallops up and tells: Now you see the Elder God, from whom all Elder Blood flows, for what he really is, come, while his spell is broken, I can get you out of here. We must hurry before he recovers.

When Ciri asks, who is Avallac'h, what is he. she is than told: He is an ancient Elder God, but he was lonely, he created Lara from his own blood. No one knows where he came from. He existed before time began. He controls time. He created time. When the universe ends, only he and time will continue on. He is the ancient Elder God. He can not die. You are part of him. You have his Elder Blood. The brooch he wears, it binds him to this place. This planet is his prison. He wants to escape, It's why he brought you here. He controls the mirrors. It's how he brought you here. 

The unicorn continues: I was able to get through his barrier and reach you after you broke the mirror that lead to Lara's tomb. Lara's blood was the power he was drawing on. He's drawing on your power now. You'd have to smash every mirror to defeat him. It's not possible. He's made too many mirrors, they are everywhere on every planet in every galaxy in every unverserse. He controls the mirrors. Every time someone looks in a mirror, he gains control over them. 

Ciri looks around the see of corpses and sees mirrors hanging everywhere. 

He needs you. Your blood. He drained too much of his own blood to create Lara. He's weak now. He's trying to regain power. Trying to track down all of his blood. He believes you stole his blood. He wants his blood back. He needs his blood back.

He has Elder Blood like me?

No. Not like you.

He's alone just like me.

Ciri don't listen to him. 

He is me.

No. Ciri don't go to him.

I am him.


He never would have hurt me. He can't. He's part of me. He made this place to keep me safe.

Ciri don't listen to him.

Everyone wants to kill him, just like they want to kill me.... because he is me.

Ciri, the gateway is closing again, we gotta leave now, it won't take him long to recover.

No! You told me to hurt him. IT WAS YOU! He never hurt me, he was never going to! 

The Fox has killed millions of humans trying to get to you. Ciri look at the corpses. You can see through the illusion now, I know you can. Look at the corpses. Look at what he's done to get you here! He uses blood to power his spells. This illusion you see right now, it has cost tens of thousands of human lives. He's killing more every day just to maintain it!

He's maintaining it for me.

Ciri, listen to me, not him.

You just wanted me to hurt him. 

No, Ciri, I'm trying to get you back home. He's evil. 

You tricked me!

I didn't. We got to get out of here.

But, I don't belong with the Humans. I'm not Human. I'm part of the Elder God. I'm his blood made life.

The Fox is evil, Ciri, we got to leave now.

Ciri has known Starry Eyes for years... he's the unicorn who has rescued her from these wild portals many times before. And he's now telling her every portal she's fallen in, was Avallac'h all along, and that this is the closest he's ever gotten to capturing her and trapping her here.

And while Ciri is talking to Starry Eyes, the world around her starts rebuilding itself as the sea of bloody corpses vanishes and grass and trees start to appear once again.

Ciri is torn between trusting the unicorn she's known for years or trusting Avallac'h, the ancient Unseen Elder God who created her Elder Blood because he was the last of his kind and didn't want to be alone...

Ciri suddenly realizes what she herself is... why she has Elder Blood... she is part of an Elder God and she was created for one reason: to be his companion, because he is very, very, very lonely.

Too late Ciri realizes what this world is... and that there were only ever 3 people here: herself, Avallac'h, and the Starry Eyed Unicorn that was trying to break through Avallac'h' barriers to take Ciri back to her home planet. Without Avallac'h this world can't exist, and with him now mortally wounded by Ciri, he's dying and the world is dying with him.

The fact that he did all of this just for her, trying to create a world she wanted, the way she wanted it, hits Ciri hard, filling her with guilt and regret, as she now wishes she had not attacked and raped Avallac'h, because she now realizes she could have been happy here, never again hunted by anyone, he would have kept her here safe for eternity, and he did what no one else had ever done: he loved her, asking for nothing in return, but to love him back.

For years, every time a portal opened and sucked Ciri into some distant galaxy, Starry Eyes has always appears to rescue her and wisk he back out of the portal, take her back. Ciri always thought of him as her rescuer... and now that she finally knows why those portals have been carrying her away, finally knows who made every one of those portals, and knows why she has Elder Blood, she's starting to see Starry Eyes as the enemy...

Ciri turns and runs from her dear old comrade Starry Eyes, leaps on her horse and gallops back to King Auberon's palace as an earthquake rips the world apart and monstrous lightening bolts set the wilderness on fire.

Racing back to Avallac'h, she now finds him terrified of her, as the wounded, crippled Elf runs from from her, locks himself in his bedroom, and starts putting barrier spells all around himself, the room, and the door the keep Ciri from getting to him

Too late Ciri realized Avallac'h never would have hurt her and would have done anything for her... he's dying and the world is dying with him.

Unable to break down the door Ciri turns and runs for King Auberon's room, but find Eredin has already killed the king.

Under the battle cry of ERADICATE THE ELDER BLOOD! 

Eredin and his Red Riders (who are NOT the Wild Hunt) barrel down on Ciri as she she runs for Avallac'h's pink cotton candy boat, completely forgetting that it has no oars, no sails, and can only be powered by the helmsman who's soul it is connected to.

Cornered on the boat, and unable to make it move in the water at all, Eredin boards the boat with Ciri while every Elf on the planet gathers around the boat in a lynch mob to kill the Elder Blood.

While Ciri and Eredin cross blades on the boat in the only real sword fight we ever see Ciri in, the boat suddenly comes alive as the river swallows her attackers, and boat sails through the sky, slamming Eredin into a stone bridge, while massive electrical barriers start going up around the entire planet, save one portal that the boat is flying straight at. 

Looking back the last thing Ciri sees is Avallac'h casting a massive blizzard on the planet that instantly kills every last Elf, turning them all into Frost Wraiths, leaving Avallac'h the last male Elf. 

The boat dissolves as it zips through the portal and Starry eyes is there to catch Ciri breaking her tumble through outer space.

He let me go!

Yes, I had not expected him to do that either. Come, we must get you back to Yennefer and Geralt before Vilgefortz kills them.

He loves me.

Don't think about him Yennefer and Geralt will die at any minute, we must hurry.

This is the end of Chapter 5 and the last Avallac'h will appear as Avallac'h... he will return in the very next chapter however, as The Fisher King.

SPOILER! Yennefer and Geralt die.... but not for several more chapters.

Yep. They defeat Vilizforzt. They get married. Have a nice big wedding. Everything is going peachy dandy, all the villains are defeated, we are 10 pages from the LAST page of the entire series and BOOM.. a race riot in a small village erupts and a boy with a pitchfork skewers Geralt and Yennefer in front of Ciri.


I have Elder Blood why can't I resurrect them?

Starry Eyes the Unicorn, shows up for no reason at all: Elder Blood can't do everything, Ciri.


No it can't.


You don't have his power Ciri, he's an Elder God, you just have his blood.

You know where he is.

He's still in Avalon, prisoner of the Unicorns.

Take me to him.


You take me, Geralt, and Yennefer back to him right now!

They are dead. This is as it was meant to be.

NO! I say what is meant to be, and I say take us back there right now.

You don't know what you are asking.

Yes I do!

If you go back to him, he'll never let you leave.

I don't care! Mommy Yennefer was not supposed to die! She was supposed to marry Geralt and live happily ever after.

So, Starry Eyes the Unicorn gathers up the dead bodies of Yennefer and Geralt and flies Ciri back to the Isle of Avallac'h on the Lake of Avalon.

Ciri finds the field where the apple trees always bloom, the location where she fell out of the sky and landed face down in Avallac'h's crotch. Sets Yennefer and Geralt there and... for some reason this brings them back to life... but now Starry Eyes lays dying.


I told you he'd never let you leave if you came back. Without me you can never leave here.

The narrator switches heads as Ciri is no longer narrating the story and Geralt is once again narrating the story....

Geralt wakes up and Yennefer is beside him waking up. Starry Eyes is dead, and Ciri is leaving the field accompanied by The Fisher King.  

As Geralt rushes to rescue Ciri from Avallac'h's new form, a mist closes in around the Lake, and the last time anyone saw Ciri, she was on a boat with Avallac'h (now The Fisher King) that was disappearing into the mists of the Lake of Avalon.

The End...

Oh wait... we got a one page epilogue...

21 Avalon years have passed, which in Geralt/Earth years is 10,500 years and everything and everyone Ciri knew and loved died nearly a millennia ago, but she's forgotten all that, because she been living in a paradise world that her beloved Fisher King built for her.

A Knight in Shining Armor rides up to the lake, finds a nude Ciri basking in the sun, and addresses her as The Lady of The Lake, while introducing himself as Sir Galahad. 

I'm not the Lady of the Lake.

Yes you are.

No I'm not.

Yes you are.

NO I'M NOT!!! I met the Lady of the Lake and her Fisher King when I was 7 years old, when a grail knight brought them to visit me and told me everything that was going to happen in my future.... wait... I'm talking to that grail knight right now I've been married to the Fisher King for centuries now... 

Ciri looks down at her hands.... OMG! I have fins and fish scales! I AM the Lady of the Lake! 

Ooooooooh! I get it! I'm about to travel to my past and warn myself of my future and then me and the Fisher King are going to build all those portals little me fell through to make sure all the correct events fall into place to make sure I become The Lady of the Lake and marry The Fisher King and live here happily ever after in Avalon.... wait... this knight knew how to get here... gotta kill him before he tells others how to get here.

Ciri immediately start plotting to rape and kill Sir Galahad as soon as he gets done helping her visit her child self, so that no one will ever find her and Avallac'h again, and they will be able to live happily ever after.


Yep... in the end. Ciri goes back to Avallac'h, marries him, she becomes the Lady of the Lake, he becomes The Fisher King and they live together in paradise for eternity.

Yep... in the end. Ciri goes back to Avallac'h, marries him, she becomes the Lady of the Lake, he becomes The Fisher King and they live together in paradise for eternity.

Oh yeah, and Avallac'h killed Starry Eyes so Ciri could never leave Avalon again.

Never mind that Ciri is fully aware that in order to maintain this massive illusion he's still sending the Wild Hunt out every night to abduct pregnant women. Ciri and Avallac'h spend eternity mass murdering millions of humans, draining their blood to keep this huge illusion spell going... 

...but what do they care, they are in love and no one knows where to find them, ad they are finally able to live in peace without fear of being hunted and they are gods in their own little insane asylum so what do they care if they have to kill a few punny uintelligent humans everyday in order to make this happily ever happen?

Also... Geralt and Yennefer are trapped on this planet for eternity as well, so... there's no logical or plausible way for any of the 3 games to have happened.

Going back to the scene when Ciri meets Avallac'h... his way too tight pants and drugged cotton candy... we are left now knowing that this was all a huge show that Avallac'h put on for Ciri because he is a psion and he could read Ciri's mind and knew exactly what she wanted.... which was Ciri was horny out of her mind and wanted to live out a rape fantasy with an elf.

And this we see is one of the more disturbing sides of Ciri, because while Avallac'h staged Ciri's fantasy bringing them to life for her, he absolutely refused to rape her, which INFURIATED HER.

Ciri... you just got defeated by the most powerful sorcerer in the universe, and he didn't even have to use magic on you. All he had to do was drop his pants and throw candy at you!

But now we know it was just because you wanted him to rape you all along. Uhmm... Ciri is more twisted then Avallac'h. Way more twisted.

Ciri suffers from so many levels of "I'm stupid dizzy dumb bimbo blond damsel in distress; diddle me, I need elf dick now!!" Bad-Erotica Trope it ain't funny.

Andrzej Sapkowski put more effort into Ciiri describing Avallac'h's way too tight lack-of-actual-pants and Avallac'h's being waaaay too excited to see Ciri... then he put into writing the entire plot of the all 8 novels.

Uh... huh... and people wonder how it is I've read chapter 5 of Lady of the Lake 23 time now... uhm.... Avallac'h is biggest dick of any character in the series and he also has the biggest dick of any male in the series a well... and he's quite proud of it.

Did I ever tell you about my most watched movie, Labyrinth which I've only watched 387 times now, and keep putting *certain scenes* on replay.... no, I'm totally rewatching Magic Dance for the catchy song.... yeah... that's it... the song.... I'm not focused on David Bowie's pants at all. No. It's a great song... wow can his pants get any tighter?

oh yeah, and before teenage me was obsessing over David Bowie's pants in Labyrinth... pre-teen me had posters of Mikhail Baryshnikov all over me wall... my parents were so glad I was into culture and wholesome things like the Russian Ballet on Masterpiece Theater.

Have you ever seen how tight Mikhail Baryshnikov's tights are?

You can see more detail in Mikhail Baryshnikov's tights while he's dancing the Nutcracker then you can see on PornHub.

And before that there was Hair!

Also I saw Hair live... before the movie came out. It was a stage play... controversial for being the first large production stage play where the entire cast was fully nude by the end.

We children of the 1960s and 1970s had much better entertainment we were allowed to see then the stifalled children of today who reach 20 year old without know what a dick is... because since the sexual stiffel-ation of the 1990, penises and nipples are apparently "evil" and have to be hidden behind R ratings now.

Of course in America in the 1970s, age of consent was 10 years old.

Did you know at the time the Witcher novels were written there was nothing illegal about Avallac'h having sex with 12 year old Ciri?

Let me repeat that for you...

At the time the Witcher novels were written, the age of consent in America was 10 years old and there was nothing illegal about Avallac'h having sex with 12 year old Ciri.

Did you also know that the age of consent in America was not increased from 10 to 18, until September 27, 1997, less than 20 years ago.

And if you don't know Hair... here... here's the song as it appeared in the 1979 movie remake of the stage play.

And while I'm giving you music videos... if never seen David Bowie's pants that became the running gag of the novel Lady of the Lake ... about halfway into the song he has an erection and the movie producers decided not to cut that part out... have fun. This 1987 children's movie has never aired on any TV station as a result and went down in history as the most banned children's movie ever made. It was officially banned by the Mormon Church, the Catholic church, and several other denominations for that one 5 second long scene. When the movie was first released it was almost immediately pulled from nearly every movie theater and became an instant cult classic for how difficult it became to to gain access to it.

Today you can buy it on DVD shelved with Disney movies at WalMart and no one notices anything wrong with it, while the bulk of young people who watch it now are totally clueless to the outraged controversy this movie produced when it came out... sold with Adult Porn movies when it first came out on VHS, this movie laughably could not be sold in normal video stores for nearly 20 years. It became a success because of how hard it was for children to get copies of it.

I remember when Labyrinth came out and we were going to see it at the movie heater, except when we got there they had already pulled it from viewing... so I didn't get to see it new, because not many did. David Bowie's pants - the biggest controversy in children's movie history.

Here... have another video... a movie critic analyzing the controversy of David Bowie's pants.

Oh, yeah... and if you think there was only ONE controversial scene starring David Bowie's pant.... uhm.... well [you forgot about this one](https://youtu.be/3ypgzzDvZS4?t=643)

Hey... who needs David Bowie's pants when we got [David Bowie's balls... yeah... ain't Labyrinth great!](https://youtu.be/3ypgzzDvZS4?t=958)

I've seen this movie 387 times, I can talk about David Bowie's pants as much as Ciri can talk about Avallac'h's pants. Maybe even more.

So now senior citizen me has not grown up or changed a bit... hey look, we are reading a great story here, wonderful plot, we are most certainly not rereading the scene of Ciri describing her grandfather's way too tight David Bowie pants again... and again... and... wait you want me to have your baby and King Auberon do it, okay, I'll do it because I'm not listening to a word you are saying, your pants are just so damn tight and wow are you happy to see me.

But... as much as he glorifies Lara, Avallac'h seems to prefer Ciri.... uhm... a lot... as his pants testified... a lot.

Everytime someone mentions Lara he has a total meltdown and tries to strangle them to death while raving gibberish about Cregannon.

And while he tries to be dominant and boss Ciri around, she's quick to whip his ass and he just shuts up and does whatever she says.

He's kind of Ciri's whipping boy and he doesn't seem to mind that. In fact, he seems to like it. It often appears that he tries to get Ciri mad, just so he can get off on her pushing him around.

While he obsesses over Lara, he never seemed to ever be happy with her, whereas, he's usually happy when Ciri's around.

PLUS.... He can go back in time and change history - we saw him do this - and what history does he actively choose to go back and change?

* He COULD have gone back in time to change the events of Lara's life and ensure that in the end, he ended up with Lara...

But he didn't.

* He DID go back in time to change the events of Ciri's life, to ensure that Ciri became the Lady of the Lake and would return to stay with him.

This tells us that in spite of his continual glorification of Lara, Avallac'h actually prefered Ciri, because when given the choice of Lara or Ciri, he did choose Ciri over Lara.

We are told that Lara never liked him right from the start, never tried to like and, several characters tell us that she was a bitch who went out of her way to try to hurt him....

Of course we SEE Ciri be a bitch and go out of her way to hurt him...

Then again his sister Isilira pushes him around too.

Yep: daughter, sister, granddaughter... he only wants blood relatives, because he's got purity of blood stuck in his head. Besides all being related to him, they all bully him and he seems to only ever try to be dominant as a way to get them to bully him more.

Avallac'h is masochistic about his choices in women, so I suppose it's a good thing Ciri is so sadistic and likes beating the crap out of him every day.

While we see him with all 3 women, we also see him back off completely wen Lara married Cregannon, and we saw him kick Isilira out of bed when Ciri ran into the room, and he went off with Ciri leaving Isilira fuming.

As much as I don't like her, Ciri seems to be the best match for him, and she's certainly the one he enjoys being with the most.

Lara never loved him, never even pretended to. Lara made it clear right from the start she never wanted to be with him.

Isilira loved him, but was very possessive of him, but was more fond of his wealth and the position she had in his palace, and even said she didn't like him with Ciri only because he was giving Ciri more gifts then he was giving her.

Both Lara and Isilira are in the game and you do see me sometimes have them traveling with us.

But, it's Ciri you NEVER see me without in the game.

True I do not like Ciri, but Avallac'h does and based on what we see him doing and saying... I do think if Lara was brought back to life, and he asked to chose, I think he'd pick Ciri.

He was with Lara barely 3 years, but he was with Ciri, we are told: 10,500 years.

And as you can see from my gameplay, Ciri is the one I've got with him.

Yeah, she's a crazy, evil psycho bitch, but, he's not peach either and they both bring out the best in each other, in spite of how they fight with each other.

Ciri, while she constantly fights with him, constantly bullies him, and brutally raped him, for a short while utterly destroying their relationship... 

* we also saw Ciri calling Avallac'h "my best friend", "my only true friend", and "the only person I can trust". 

* We see Ciri throw jealous rages when Avallac'h doesn't spend enough time with her. 

* The only times we ever see Ciri laughing and smiling are when she's horseback riding or boating with Avallac'h. 

* And the only time we ever see Ciri show boundless exclamations of joy is when she thought Avallac'h was dead, then learned he was still alive. 

* The ONLY TIME we see Ciri HAPPY, is when she learns Avallac'h is still alive.

* The ONLY time we see Ciri feel guilt for hurting someone, is when she hurts Avallac'h, and we see her never hurt him again.

* The rape event left Avallac'h deeply traumatized and we saw Ciri feel terrible for doing it and go out of her way to try to repair the damage done to their relationship - Ciri NEVER did stuff like this, and yet she did for Avallac'h

* While he never fully recovers, we see him take her back and them stay together after that

* Ciri never played with anyone, she never played at all, she never had a childhood, playing was a thing she was never taught to do, yet we saw her playing with Avallac'h, both of them acting like carefree children 

* Ciri said she liked being with Avallac'h because he always listened to her 

* Ciri also said she liked being with Avallac'h because he always made time for her; no matter what he was doing, he always stopped and spent time with her instead

* Avallac'h said he liked spending time with Ciri because she was the only person who ever talked to him

* Avallac'h also said he liked spending time with Ciri because she was the only person who ever listened to him talk

* Avallac'h said sex offered no excitement for him, adding that not even Lara was able to spark his interest in sex, and yet we see him pulling off a wild overly sexual display with Ciri, just because that's what Ciri wanted

* We saw both Ciri and Avallac'h say they were lonely, and we saw both of them saying they were not lonely when with the other

* We see Avallac'h's perceived overly sexual nature to be a false public show he puts on to hide the fact that he's asexual, something society has taught him to be ashamed of.

* While he hides it from everyone else, we see Avallac'h only ever confiding the fact that he's asexual to 2 people: Ciri and Geralt.

* We see Ciri, while proclaiming to be a lesbian, also going horn dog crazy trying to get Avallac'h to have sex with her and being frustrated to no end by his being asexual.

* And we ultimately see Ciri, publically, in front of dozens of witnesses, drive a sword through his testicles, leaving Avallac'h both infertile, and a lot more asexual then he already was... but for some reason him forgiving her and taking her back.

* Now the Maimed King of Arthurian Legends, we see Avallac'h flee society and go into hiding, no longer able to hide his being asexual, after what Ciri publicly did to him. He becomes a hermit, living on an island in the Lake of Avalon.

* After fleeing Eredin, years later Ciri returns to Avalon and finds that Avallac'h has not recovered and is barely able to live anything close to any semblance of a normal life. The crippled Elf can no longer walk, can no longer speak, and has cast an illusion spell on himself to pass himself off as Human. 

* Because he is only rarely ever seen, and than only seen fishing from a boat before jumping off the boat and swimming under the water to hide... people have begun to call Avallac'h The Fisher King

* Horrified at the extreme change in Avallac'h and realizing that she is the one who did this to him, Ciri finds his hut on the Isle of Avallac'h in the Lake of Avalon and stays with him, taking care of him and becoming his wife.

* People eventually forget both Avallac'h and Ciri, and the only thing anyone remembers is the crazy old Fisher King and his witch-queen wife The Lady of the Lake.

* While he never stopped saying he loved Lara, we also saw Avallac'h treating Lara like a distant memory, and appeared more to like the idea of what he wanted Lara to be, rather than actually liking Lara for who she was

* We saw Avallac'h say he wanted a goddess he could worship and say that he thought Lara was that goddess

* However, we saw Ciri actually become the goddess (Lady of the Lake) and Avallac'h worshipping her instead of Lara

* Plus, in the end, even after all the shitty things she did to him, Ciri was the one who went back to him and would go on to live with him for 10,500 years.

Yeah... in the end... Avallac'h and Ciri are good together.

They both enjoy each other's company, they both clearly love each other, they both bring out both the best and worst in each other, they are both quick to forgive each other for anything, and they are both content to live with each other.

And while Avallac'h gets hurt quite  lot by Ciri, it's Ciri's love for Avallac'h that ultimately opens her eyes to the fact that she's been a very bad person her whole life and should try to be better.

We never see Ciri fully change out of her evil ways, but, we do see her mellow out, and take to a non-violent life style, becoming the Lady of the Lake and living a peaceful quiet life with Avallac'h (who by that point has become The Fisher King).

I believe a couple should be good for each other and be happy together... and they are.

Plus I don't believing in breaking up a couple. Ciri is the one Andrzej Sapkowski put Avallac'h with.

After 7 novels of shit and hell being thrown at her, Ciri gets a happy every after, and for Ciri, happily ever after means being Avallac'h's wife for eternity.

Which I know pisses so many Cir fans off, that she stays with the biggest dick of the series in the end, but... hey, he is the only one who actually was in love with her... the morbidly depressed Elder God finally found a mate who loved him in return.

They do have one hell of a Fairy Tale ending, and while I don't like that we never saw Ciri become a good person we could look up to as a hero... 

...I do like that both she and Avallac'h finally did escape the millions who hunted them for their Elder Blood and the 2 Elder Bloods were able to be happy is an illusionary fantasy world they built for each other on the Isle of Mists.

I know when people read my rage about the Rape Scene on page 179, (see the next panel below this one titled:  FAQs: Why are people saying Avallac'h deserved to be raped? I haven't read the novels. What did he do? What is the rape scene everyone is worked up over?    ..............................................     Why are people in your chat saying Avallac'h is abusive? ..............................................  Did Avallac'h beat Ciri, like people say? ..............................................  ).... people tend to think I hate Ciri.

I don't hate Ciri, I hate that people glorify the rape scene as being heroic.

Granted without the rape scene, Avallac'h never would have become The Fisher King and Ciri never would have seen how evil she had been her whole life and changed her ways - slightly.

The rape scene WAS a pivotal part of the original story "The Fisher King and The Lady of The Lake" (which was written in the 11th century by an unknown author, and was the primary base story of the entire Witch franchise.)

When the main part of the original story's plot was the evil witch queen's violent sexual attack on the philandering Fairy King of Avalon, it's kind of hard to not expect that it's going to be a pivotal scene in the 1990's Witcher novel remake of that same story.

But... can you see now why I do have "Ciri & Avallac'h Forever" as the motto of my entire Twitch channel?

They were a rather dramatic and volatile couple in the novels and in the end of the series they get back together and stay together and are happy together... and I don't see any reason to change the ending Andrzej Sapkowski gave them.

One of the things that makes them such a great couple is that they are such a bizarre combination, but they just enjoy each other's company so much.

We see them literally at each other's throats, strangling each other, punching each others teeth out... yeah, they get really violent with each other and oddly that seems to make them enjoy each other's company even more.

Neither of them is able to stay away from the other for very long. They are both so obsessed with each other that they are both positively not letting the other out of their sight.

Their relationship is built on trust not looks, with both of them fully trusting their life in the hands of the other. And one of the things that really stands out and makes them a good couple is how very forgiving they are. Each is quick to forgive the other anything, and this level of forgiveness is seen going to extremes after Ciri brutally rapes Avallac'h leaving him crippled for the rest of his life and we see him forgive her almost the instant she asks for forgiveness.

They are odd, they are strange, and they are totally out of control. Their emotions are over the top, and either will defend the other to the death.

While Ciri is with Avallac'h she becomes complex, smart, and emotional, losing her dull, emotionless, cookie cutter blandness that she has in the first 6 novels. With him, we see her suddenly come to life and start acting a little less robotic and you can almost start to believe she might actually be human.

He's mentally ill and she's socially awkward and afraid of the world. Neither of them is fully able to fit in with normal society. Avallac'h sees so much in Ciri and has always watched her from afair hoping she'd notice him, but then when she finally did, he didn't know how to deal with it.

They are an uncomfortable match made in heaven.  Neither has enough social skills to talk straight, both are prone to talking to themselves, Avallac'h talking to his brain and Ciri talking to whoever it is that lives in her head. 

Neither can be comfortable with anyone and they are both nervous wrecks. Yet when alone together they both relax and enjoy very long pleasant conversations with each other. That they enjoy every second of their time spent together is clear.

Watching them together, it's almost like 2 kids trying to figure out what it is to be in love or go out on a date.

Avallac'h is shy, feels unloved, and unworthy, but he does what he does best: obsess, and while this would chase most women away, it actually is what draws Ciri closer to him. She is intrigued by the fact that some one actually cares about her and isn't just after her powers.

His overly bold, obnoxiously, manic depressive personality sometimes gets in the way, but her dominate nature reels himm in from his insanity and brings him back down to a more or less normal level of madness.

Every time he sees her his world is dancing. That how he sees her. The world around him changes with his mode, with flowers growing up at his feet when he's happy and black clouds and thunder crashes when he's upset. What do we see every time Ciri is nearby? he world changes to bright shades of pink, rainbows form in the sky, the field become filled with flowers, and the old crippled Elf who normally struggles to walk is suddenly twirling around dancing.

Their happiness with each other is boundless. She forgets all her worries and troubles when she is with him, and we see her spending hours with him on his boat, just talking to him about nothing at all, just talking because it's what they like to do.

No one understands either of them, and this distresses each of them to no end. But they each find they can understand the other and this overjoys each of them, as they find they can be themselves with each other and not have to worry about trying to fit in with social norms.

It's a great moment when these two finally realize they can be happy and that they can be happy together. Even though they are both unbelievably socially awkward, they can be socially awkward together in their own little world they built for themselves where no one ever bothers them and they can live blissfully at peace, alone in each other's company.

They enjoyment they get from each other is so extreme, it's something you rarely see with any couple. They are active and energizes in each other's company.

Both have their obvious faults. Ciri being naive, abusive, and very selfish and Avallac'h being too protective and not always opening up to the real world, lost instead in the world in his head.

They get jealous with one another and they bicker and argue, but when they do you also see that it's never about wanting to control the others, it's that they actually do care about each other.

They understand one another. 

They support one another. 

They play together.

Ciri always gets into trouble and any rational husband would have left her years ago.

But Avallac'h sees that like a child, she just doesn't know any better.

Though she hurts him over and over and over again, he sees past the abuse to see that she doesn't really want to be mean, but rather she is frustrated with all that life has thrown at her and while any one else would have thrown her away in a second, her remains kind, caring and understanding, knowing that she really is trying to be a better person, even if she never outwardly shows it. 

Others don't understand them and they are fine with this.

They know that not being normal and being social outcasts is okay. They celebrate it. It's what makes them who they are. It what makes them unique. And even if it turns out everyone hates them - they don't give a shit. They love themselves and they love each other and in a Bonnie and Clyde sort of way, that's all that really matters to them.

They share a surprisingly really strong chemistry. They are disgusting monstrous villains and they don't mind that that is what they are as long as they have each other.

Ciri is shown to us to be a hideous monster. While others call her fat and ugly, Avallac'h calls her beautiful. While others can not see past her repulsively scared face, Avallac'h doesn't even see the scars and glorifies her enthral eyes.

When Avallac'h's illusions break down, he's revealed to be a monstrous serpent and not really an Elf, but Ciri sees past this to see that he sacrificed everything to make her happy.

They sarcastically insult each other. Any other couple would take these insults as hurtful, but for them, it's just everyday talk. It's how they communicate with one another during the bad situations they live with, and they both understand that. 

Any time you see them saying things to each other that seem way too harsh, you can clearly see they are enjoying it, they act silly and joking,  and you understand that the harshness of their words is their way of saying, i understand and am coping with you. You understand this because half the insults they make about each other, they also make about themselves.

They are bitter and sarcastic and they wouldn't have it any other way. They are the perfect couple to be joyfully miserable together and they know it and revel in it.

While their relationship is flawed and rocky, they love each other and in the end are a bizarre, creepy, crazy, chaotic, caring, and sometime scary, couple.

In the end Ciri chose to go back with Avallac'h. She ended up being the one who loved him enough to go back to him and stay with him.

And yes, if Geralt and Yennefer had not died she might not have gone back to him. She did go back only to have him resurrect her adopted parents... BUT... as we saw on the very last page, when she was given the option to go back in time and change the past... she chose to instead, make sure these events happened INCLUDING Geralt and Yennefer's deaths to ensure she would end up here with Avallac'h in the end.

In spite of all the insane stuff that happens, they do work very well together.  

It is dysfunctional and it is flawed, but they love each other and put so much effort in trying to make it work, that it does work.

Their relationship is totally ludacris and doesn't often make a lot of sense, but after all they hell they've been through and all the hell they've put each other through, you realize it was all because it was in the end, true love.

No matter what else they have done, the one constant remains: they absolutely love each other.

So, yeah, I do pick Ciri. Always Ciri with Avallac'h.

Lara and Isilira can go fuck themselves. They both treated him like shit. Ciri treated him like shit too, but, it turns out Ciro also loved him and eventually stopped hurting him.

He loves her. She loves him. There's no reason to break them up.

My question is, why do people get so infuriatingly pissed off on super crazed, super insane, super irrational, super psychotic, super toxic levels over the thought of Ciri staying with Avallac'h?

What are you people getting so angry about? They are fictional characters.... if you don't like the was the author wrote them, just do hat the game devs did and change the ending to fix it the way you wanted it to be.

I think the problem a lot of people have with Ciri ending up staying with Avallac'h is the whole:

#But he's the villain! The hero shouldn't end up with the villain!

Uhm... okay, did you really pay any attention to Ciri at all?

Ciri is the evilest piece of shit villain to ever walk the face of literature. 

Ciri is not just the most evil piece of shit in the Witcher universe... she is the evilest piece of shit EVERY WRITTEN IN ANYTHING!!!!! And you are UPSET that two villains end up hooking up and living happily ever after?

You know one of the reasons I like the Witcher novels is BECAUSE you see the world THROUGH THE EYES OF THE EVILEST VILLAIN ON THE PLANET.

How many books out there tell the story through the eyes of the villain?

Not many.

As a hero you can look up to, Ciri is crap.

But as the villian who gives you a look at the evil shit a villain does through the eyes of the villain who 100% does not believe they are evil: Ciri is the most genius character ever created.

And the very fact that so many people can read the novels and INCORRECTLY THINK that Ciri is NOT a villain, is testament to how well Andrzej Sapkowski created her character and wrote her story.... well, kind of... he didn't create Ciri or write her story, seeing how she was created in 1130 by an anonymous author.

The fact that readers can see the world through the eyes of Satan's 5th great granddaughter and overlook the evil acts she commits at every turn and reach the end believing she's a hero is astounding. Either the readers are brain dead retarded or  Andrzej Sapkowski  is the greatest master of writing stories through villains eyes.

But really think about the ending:

You NEVER see a villain get a happily ever after ending and be allowed to continue being a villain.

Yet, we see Ciri get a happily ever after and be allowed to go on being a villain.

Look at the world she is living in at the end with Avallac'h... we were told in Chapter 5, that in order to maintain this paradise world he built out of Ciri's fantasies, that he had to kill several people every single day...

...and what did Ciri do? Did she try to stop him? No. Her response was: OMG, he really loves me that much?

She never tried to stop him from killing people to build her paradise world, instead she got all puffed up and even more self-centered over the fact that there was someone out there who loved her enough to be killing millions of people in her honor.

Ciri loved this!

And than in the end, when Geralt and Yennefer die... what does she do?

She knows full well that going back to him, asking him to save these 2 people she loved, it's going to happen at the cost of tens of thousands of lives, every year, for the rest of eternity... and she comes right out and says: I don't care!

Ciri DOES NOT CARE that millions upon millions upon billions of people are going to have to die in order to bring Geralt and Yennefer back to life.

Ciri DOES NOT CARE that millions upon millions upon billions of people are going to have to die so she can sunbathe on the Lake of Avalon for eternity.

Ciri is that cold hearted, that callus, that selfish, that cruel... that she is just going to sit back on her lazy ass, letting Avallac'h kill millions of lives, to power the spell that lets her lay on a boat in the lake sipping margaritas and working on her tan.

That's how evil a bastard villain Ciri really is.

She is that selfish.

She is that evil.

She doesn't give a shit about the millions of lives lost, as long as she gets everything she wants and has a devoted whipping boy to worship her ass and obey her every wicked whim, Ciri is a okay with him killing millions to pamper her.

Yeah, Ciri ends up staying with a villain, but did we really expect anything less from a villainess as evil as Ciri? She wouldn't be happy with a hero and you know it.

Ever wanted to find The Game Dev Photo?

Here is the VOD of our 5th trip up Mt Gorgon to see the Game Dev Photo... if you ever wanted to know where it is and how to get to it, watch this video as we take you to see it yet again...

Watch We seem to be on our way to Mt Gorgon to see the Game Dev photo for the 5th time... from EelKat on www.twitch.tv

If This Video Is Active, I'm Live Streaming Right Now...

Watch live video from EelKat on www.twitch.tv

The Space Dock 13 WebRing

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What do you want to become? 
What did you do today to step closer to that goal?
Whatever you do, be your best at it!
And remember to have yourself a great and wonderfully glorious day!


By EelKat Wendy C Allen

Eye of the GrigoriIf you ever made fun of or had any part in the destruction of my farm, and the illegal selling of half of my land to Colliard, you shall lose your land.
tent2.JPGIf you ever made fun of or had any part in my being homeless since 2006 - YES, I AM still homeless in 2023, you shall become homeless.
eelkats_house_before_after.jpgIf you ever made fun of or had any part in the backhoe driving over my house, you shall lose your house.
home again the return of the goldeneagle dodge 330If you ever made fun of or had any part in my car being cut in half, you shall lose your car.
volvo-art-car-eelkat-Dazzling-Razzbury-3-artist-wendy-c-allen-painting3.pngIf you ever made fun of or had any part in my becoming crippled, you shall lose your health.
If you ever made fun of or had any part in the murder of my son, your child shall die an equally horrible death.

Evil men go out of their way to try to drive a person to suicide.

Are you an evil man?

Are you sure you're not?

How many people have YOUR hate filled words killed?

Next time you go to do a mean thing to a fellow human, stop and really think about the consequences of your actions.

Did you ever notice how every one has a story to tell about me, yet not one of them ever speaks the truth?

What lies has YOUR gossiping tongue spread about me?

Did you know...

October 16, 2006, bomb blew up my house because of YOUR lies.

August 8, 2013, the house which replaced the one the bomb blew up, was driven over by a backhoe.

November 14, 2013, my 8 month old infant son was murdered because of your lies.

November 14, 2013, I was beaten up, paralized for 5 months, spent 18 weeks relearning to walk, I'm now crippled for the rest of my life, because of YOUR lies.

Are you proud of what you have done?

Enjoy your eternity in Hell. You earned it. You've certainly worked hard for it.


If you have any information about any of these events, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

About This Game Play:

This current mod-making playthrough, is prep for a future fully-lore-friendly playthrough....

The ultimate goal of my mod making playthrough, is to make every character as lore-friendly as possible to how they were described in the novels.

Most specifically though we are transforming as much of the game as possible to match Chapter 5 of the novel Lady of the Lake, when Ciri lived with Avallac'h the first time, on The Lake of Avalon.

This current playthrough is largely a lot of test runs of hundreds of mods. It is being played open world with quests rarely happening, to allow us to run tests of various mods as I build them.

Due to the fact that the game engine, scripts, and other files is often open and being edited while I'm playing the game, this current playthrough is very unstable with bugs and glitches happening  daily and game crashes happening, sometimes as often as every few minutes.

You are witnessing a live overhaul and full rewrite of the game, that when finished will be used in a complete (more normal style) playthrough of the game.

However do not expect to see the lore-friendly playthrough any time soon. 

I began building this overhaul mod May 13, 2018 and have worked on it daily for 4 to 12 hours a day, all of it streamed here on Twitch, and... 

...while we've now altered over 2,000 script files, more than 7,000 textures, several hundred meshes, 400+ xml files, dozens of ini files, and have now begun work on changing 3D models...

...this project is far from finished and could see as much as another 3 years of daily work before completion.

Computer  stats: 

Motherboard: Asus Z170

Processor: i7-7000 @4.20GHz

RAM: 16 GB

Graphics Card: NVirdia 1070 GTX

Capture Card: AVerMedia Live Gamer HD

November 14, 2023 will be the 10 year anniversary of the November 14, 2013 murder of my 8 month old infant son, at BugLight Lighthouse Art Studio of Southern Maine Community College in South Portland, Maine. If you have any information about who his killer is, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322November 14, 2023 will be the 10 year anniversary of the November 14, 2013 murder of my 8 month old infant son, at BugLight Lighthouse Art Studio of Southern Maine Community College in South Portland, Maine. If you have any information about who his killer is, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322

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