November 14, 2023 will be the 10 year anniversary of the November 14, 2013 murder of my 8 month old infant son, at BugLight Lighthouse Art Studio of Southern Maine Community College in South Portland, Maine. If you have any information about who his killer is, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322
My Son Was Murdered, The Killer Walks Free, Your Child Could Be Next!
FAQ: What are the most visited pages on this website and how many visits do they get?
Several years ago, I wrote an article on how to write different types of magic uses, or rather how I personally write various types of magic users within the context of my Quaraun books. Today that page is one of my top ten most visited articles. It gets 50 to 500 views/reads/hits/visits per day depending on the time of the years and has had over 200k visits total since it was published.
Amphibious Aliens: Debunking The Atwater Family's Alien Abduction Hoax with more then 30MILLION reads since 2007 and The GoldenEagle: Debunking Stephen King's World's Most Haunted Car Hoax with over tenMILLION reads since 2007 still rank as the two most visited articles on my website, but, neither of those are writing related.
Writing Medieval Servants is my most visited writing related article with over 7MILLION reads.
This website was started in 1996 and has 1 to 3 new articles (all written by me, I am the only writer on this site) published almost daily. In 2017 we crossed ten thousand articles published. As of 2023, EACH article gets MINIMUM 10 to 70 reads PER DAY, with the high traffic articles getting 500+ reads per day.
And since December 2019, my website now gets three hundred thousand to 7 million reads per month - well over ONE HUNDRED MILLION PAGE READS PER YEAR, making it not only the single most trafficked site in the State of Maine, but also one of the most visited websites in ALL OF NEW ENGLAND!
{{{HUGS}}} Thank you to all my readers for making this possible!
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Where to get started in Absurd Fiction? That's actually a very good question.
I think the place to start is to first know what Absurdism is and what it is not.
Absurdism is not a type of Humor or Comedy, so I'm uncertain if what you are calling Absurdist Fiction actually is Absurdist Fiction or not.
I am fascinated by your definition of The Absurd.
Absurd means Weird, Strange, and Bizarre.
Insanity is another word for Absurd. Did you know that?
Insanity is the dictionary definition of Absurd.
Go get a dictionary and look it up. Absurdity is just another word for insanity. Bizarre is also another word for Absurd. As is crazy and weird.
Absurdist Fiction is also known as Bizarre Fantasy, Weird Horror, and Bizarro. None of which has anything to do with Comedy, Humour, or being funny.
While Absurdist Fiction can have it's funny moments, it is not as a genre, intended to make the reader laugh. Quite the contrary, Absurdist Literature is intended to force the reader to think deep thoughts about deep topics.
Looking for Absurd fiction to read? Alice in Wonderland is one of the very early works of Absurdist Fiction. There is nothing even remotely funny, humorous, or comedic about drug addict peadophiles obsessing over 8 year old girls. You DO know that's what Alice in Wonderland is about, right? Another early work is Call of Cthulhu, again, far from funny and at times quite disturbing with is white power cultists slaughtering minorities to ancient elder gods, while demons slaughter humanity.
The Bronze Door, stands as another early work of the Absurd - a tale of a hen pecked man's dark plot to murder his wife.
The Unicorn in the Garden, another early tale of the Absurd, about another hen-pecked husband, and the unicorn he wishes would murder his wife.
Used to Lover Her, a song by Guns N Roses, is a work of modern Absurd Fiction set to music, about a hen pecked man who escaped his wife by burying her in the garden.
Absurd Fiction is dark.
Very Dark.
And it's humor dry and morbid.
Gallows Humour. Humor that laughs at torture and murder. Absurdity laughs at murder in a twisted method of showing a thing is wrong, but focusing on it to an extreme.
If you think Absurd Fiction is meaningless drivel meant only to make a person laugh, than you truly have no clue what The Absurdist Movement is at all.
In modern Absurdism, you have recent classics like The Riff, about one porn star's search for toilet paper during a zombie apocalypse. Yes... a young woman, shopping in her undies for t-p, while zombies massacre the rest of the shoppers... she spends the entire story searching for a roll without blood stains.
Here... the story had a music video made of it...
If you want to do an indepth study of The Absurd, a good place to look is to music videos.
The Absurd has a large movement in the music industry.
Look to:
The reigning kings & queens of the Absurd.
If I had to pick one musician who over all, through all his songs, and music videos best encompases the Absurd, I'd pick Avatar, and their music video From the Swarm is a prime example of why I pick them:
New Land is probably one of the best done Absurdist music videos ever, also by Avatar...
Statue of a King, again by Avatar, is another good example of Absurdist Fiction set to music...
Nobody does Absurdist music videos better than Avatar.
They are a "YouTube band", (one of the few who has gotten their songs on mainstream radio) so if you really want to see Abursism on the extreme, go to their YouTube channel and watch their MANY music videos.
Though I think my #1 favourite Absurdist music video of all time, might be Teenage Rock God by Rob Zombie...
(TRIGGER WARNING - if you are a self righteous social justice warrior you may find this video to be HIGHLY racist, due to its diptiation of Voodoo Priests and Priestesses. HOWEVER, I am myself a Voodoo Priestess, rank of Medsen Fey Marija Loa to Damballa, and I'm not the least bit offended by this video, so if you find it offensive - as many people do - you might want to ask those of us who are members of the religion if we find it offensive before you go have yourself a hissy fit..)
Absurdism is noted for being very extreme and pushing limits. Absurdists are the most radical of the social justice warriors, PETA members, tree hugging, vegan, blood-bucket tossing, renegade animal rights activist who boldly protest war, guns, meat, abortion, white power, racism, and anything they hurts anyone. Know for their psycho freak extremist marches, boycotts, and parades, they fight for gay rights, animal rights, human rights, and saving the environment and do it with wild costumes, eye popping art, elaborate stage sets, psychobilly art cars, renegade fiction, and in you face extremist music videos.
The most common themes of Absurdism are:
Absurdism exists to send a message. It is never as pointless as it at first seems.
Absurdism is a shock genre, that uses extreme actions to shock you into taking a second look, resulting in you becoming mesmerised by the absurdity of it, drawing you in with a hypnotic need to tear your eyes away in disgust, horror, and disbelief, but an inability to look away because it is so extreme you can't believe what it is you are reading/seeing. Thus you unwittingly absorb a hidden message that you might otherwise have ignored.
If I had to pick one music video to sum up the ENTIRE vast expanse of The Absurd genre... it'd be Save Our Souls by Blutengel... it takes EVERYTHING Absurdism is known for and throws it all into one 4 minute music video.
It is the story of the world destroyed by the greed of oil and nuclear power industry billionaires, while the faceless victims die unnoticed... while the porn industry glorifies the bodies of the dead for even more greed... like all Absurdism, it carries the message that life is frail, fleeting, and important, but no one cares because they are too busy using each other for money...
(TRIGGER WARNING - not for the squeamish... contains graphic violence, images of cutting with razors, realistic depiction of suicide victims, and full frontal nudity.)
As you can see from that video, humour is nowhere to be found, because Absurdism is not about Humour. Yes, some Absurdism contains Humour, but Humour is not a prerequisite to Absurdism.
This video shocks you by showing you a suicide victims, naked, her face obscured from view, her body laid out in a very sexual pose, enticing the viewer and reviling them at the same time.
It next shows you 3 other suicide victims, their faceless corpse rising up, to carry the first in her coffin, though a real live city that was laid to waste by a nuclear meltdown.
This is going on, while the man at the front of the screen, sings about how war is tearing the land apart, greedy fuel corps are destroying the face of the world, and young girls are being driven to suicide by the porn industry's use of human trafficling.
It uses shocking imagery to send a message about human rights and the need for people to open their eyes to the horror we live in and stop pampering themselves when so many are suffering around them.
THIS is what Absurdism is about. And that is why I call THIS, the ideal music video to show you how Absurdism works and why it exists.
While some Absurdism may use Humour to send it's message, ALL Absurdism uses shocking/disturbing imagery to burn it's message into the brain.
The Absurd spans far more than fiction. Look for it in your local live theatre if you really want to get into it.
Here... no better way to experience The Absurd then to watch it in living colour... every one of these videos is a masterpiece of The Absurd and a wonderful way to get a task of the genre and what it's all about...
First up we have the story of a future world where men are nothing but slaves to television... literally... they exist only to keep tv sets operating... tv sets are now the dominate species...
Here's an icon in Absurdism. If you are an avid devourer of Absurdism, then you already know this early cult classic that brought Absurdism to the mainstream when this tiny little MySpace band made sweeping international headlines, when they were sued to hell and back by Kellogg's Corporation.
Yep, you know who we are talking about... it's the infamous kings of controversy themselves: Green Jello!
And if you've never seen the music video behind the lawsuit, well, here it is... meet Cereal Killer! a song about the day Toucan Sam flipped his lid and went on a mass murdering serial killing spree killing off all the cereal icons.
Watch now as Toucan Sam murders:
But here you go, Green Jello's Cereal Killer! the iconic cult classic of early Absirst Music videos, watch now this controversial boob filled, bloodbath, of jiggly titties and massacred puppets...
(TRIGGER WARNING - not for the squeamish... contains graphic claymation violence.)
Inspired by Green Jelly, comes on their heels Mac Sabbath...
Yet another band inspired by Green Jelly is Radioactive Chickenheads here to say Cluck You!
If your boss knows German, then the words to this song are EXTREMELY not safe for work... for the Americans who are blissfully unaware, basically this is a song about how your mother is a cock sucking cunt and he's the mother fucker who made her that way... also, if you don't blink, you'll see a penis flashed in this one (3:54 if you want to find it)... ;)
This one gets classified as Absurdism. not for the story of the song, but rather for the extremes they went to to make the video itself, including to have a hole drilled in his face in order to have a light bulb inserted into his throat. Watch his mouth light up every time he opens it, just like opening a refrigerator door.
Then we have a crew of survivors, frozen on an ark in space, destined to save humanity... but the only thing they want is just one last drink of beer...
I think one can safely say that no one does over the top Absurdism gone extreme better then the Japanese do... in this video you find serial killing transvestite opera singers who escaped from the local insane asylum and have gone on a cannibalistic killing spree... why? Because it's Absurdism, who needs any more reason then that for transvestite opera singers to go on a killing spree?
I give you... Insanity Injection... one of the single most extreme Absurdist music videos ever made...
A detachable penis... yes, that IS what this song is about...
Are you a FaNF fanatic? If so, you'll love this music video starring Mark Fischbach, aka Markiplier, as a Freddy Fazbear Security Guard terrorized by teddy bears... (based on the video game Five Nights at Freddy's)
Inspired by both Green Jelly's Cereal Killer and Five Nights At Freddy's, here's Radioactive Chicken Heads once again, this time out to rescue children from Chuck E-Cheese's murderous rat...
If you've never seen Fatty Boom Boom before, I should probably put a warning here... shit head Christian Americans with their pro-Nazi, white power heads stuck up their asses... this anti-American video made by a band in Africa, this one was dedicated to you...
If you can't tell what they are saying... they are talking about how America is nothing but a shit headed, fuck-feast, white power inbreed group of terrorists running around screaming murder, murder, murder, kill, kill, kill, money, money, money, yippee, ki-yay! (yes, those are the lyrics)....
Notice the black men wearing the graffitied Ku Klux Klan uniforms while they dance and drum.
This song is about how Africans in Africa see Americans as the worst terrorists on the planet and talks about how America has a history of terrorism, starting with it's invasion of America and slaughtering the Native American Indians, to the slavery of Africans, to the current threats on Asian countries.
(TRIGGER WARNING - not for the squeamish... as soon as you see the doctor walk in... you might want to stop the video and not watch the ending. Also contains black people in white face paint and white people in black face paint - EXTREMELY TRIGGERING for people upset by racism!)
Korn's Kidnap The Sandy Claws and Tim Burtan's A Nightmare Before Christmas
Six foot tall rabbits in the mall, because... why not?
Papers Please... if you know the video game, you know the story, if not... well... the main character is an immigration passport inspector whose job it is to keep terrorist bombers out of the country, but accepts bribes from various terrorists while turning aware legit citizens. (Was inspired by actual events that occured at the berlin Wall in Germany in 1982.)
The world after food becomes god and demands to be worshipped...
The carnival of death has come to town, as freaks reign supreme in mObscene... one of many music video interpretations of the book Something Wicked This Way Comes...
A look at the dark side of Alice in Wonderland... Japanese style...
Another signer, another band, another music video interpretation of the book Something Wicked This Way Comes...
Again, we head to Japan to find that Absurdism reigns supreme and no one does it like the Japanese do...
...in this story of a young girl who wants to learn to head bang, and along comes a magic neck corset to teach her how...
The story of how Satan's Black Pope came to rule the world and ensnare humanity...
Once upon a time the world had ended, and along came David Bowie and a Glass Spider to tell the tale...
Lady Gaga on the sin of commercialism...
Another song from the African band Die Antwoord, about a dog and some cats, and a lot of violence.
(TRIGGER WARNING - not for the squeamish... contains graphic violence.)
Because of it's "innocent" words and super childish music video, Wynona's Big Brown Beaver is often sung by school children thinking they are singing about a zoo, and thought of my many parents as a cute children's song... it's actually about a 1970s porn star who didn't shave or wash her pussy...
And speaking of children's songs, sung in school... what could possibly be wrong with The Three Little Pigs?
Everything when Green Jelly is retelling this blood bath tale of wolfish massacre... Watch for Rambo to make a guest cameo in this, absurd, drug filled, ganster feast, Green Jello bloodbath...
It's Absurdism... thus we need more cotton picking, banjo playing white rabbits named Harvey...
Yet another band to give us a music video interpretation of the book Something Wicked This Way Comes...
The government exists to ensnare, but eventually the enslaved people fight back...
Beautiful People.... in a world far from pretty...
Kindergarten... if you don't know the video game, you might want to skip this story of drug dealing, serial killer 5 year olds... (if you watch closely--- this entire thing is only 1 person acting out the entire Kindergarten cast, even Miss Jigglytitts - yes, that his her name in the game.) (NOTE - though this music video is tame and more or less "kid friendly", the game is HIGHLY triggering, and not for any one easily upset by murder, abortion, drugs, and peadophile janitors.)
The Bear Went Over The Mountain To See What He Could See... yet another classic children's song, turned on it's head by MySpace's most infamous band, Green Jelly...
Along came a Spider and Alice Cooper sat down beside her...
Another music video interpretation of the book Something Wicked This Way Comes...
From Psychopathic Records, comes The Insane Clown Posse...
A look at the dark side of Alice in Wonderland...German style...
Based on a true story... a dark look at the media obsession with glorifying a mass murderer to the point that he developed fans to protest his execution... (inspired by the same real life German terrorist attacks that inspired the video game Paper's Please)
(TRIGGER WARNING -Viewer discretion is STRONGLY advised... very graphic video that shows actual news footage (real dead people in this video) in a music video that shows news reporters for the heartless people they really are..
Lady Gaga once again, in the video that made her famous as Mother Monster...
There are hundreds more music videos in The Absurd, but these should get you started.
Likewise, The Absurd also exists in movies as well.
If you want movies in The Absurd...
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.
Beetlejuice
Willy Wonka
Charlie & The Chocolate Factory
Attack of The Killer Shrews
The Phantom Empire
And of course the movie for which the The Absurdist movement was named for:
Bela Lugosi's Plan 9 from Outer Space
But you asked specifically about writing the absurd and to get a better feel for how The Absurd is written, the best place to go would be to the top three bestselling Absurdist novels of all time, yes?
The top bestselling novels of The Absurd, are:
The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy
The Haunted Vagina
Cum For Bigfoot
You want to live it every day... try OtherKin.
OtherKin, if you didn't know is the art form of living your life as a fictional, non-Human species.
The OtherKin movement started in the 1970s when a community of hippies got together and decided they no longer wanted to be Humans as Humanity was fast destroying the world. They declared themselves "The Silver Elves" and have lived the past 50 years as Elves.
The Silver Elves have since grown into a community of authors and artists who dress like Elves, act like Elves, eat like Elves, and like the Amish, live completely cut off from modern Human society.
Sometimes seen as a cult, they are not only the founders of The OtherKin movement, but they are considered by other members of the OtherKin movement to be the most absurd and most extreme of all OtherKin.
From their own website, they have this to say about themselves:
The Elven Way is the spiritual Path of the Elves. It is not a religion. While all elves are free to pursue whatever spiritual path they desire, or not as the case may be, these elves are magicians and follow no particular religious dogma. The Silver Elves do however believe in all the Gods and Goddesses, (also Santa Claus to whom they're related, the tooth fairy as a distant cousin, and the Easter or Ostara Bunny, no relation.) and they try to treat them all with due respect.
The Elven Way promotes the principles of Fairness, that is to say both Justice, Elegance and Equal Opportunity and Courtesy that is respectful in its interactions and attitude toward all beings, great or small. The Silver Elves understand the world as a magical or miraculous phenomena, and that all beings, by pursuing their own true path, will become whomever they truly desire to be.
The path of the Silver Elves is that of Love and Magic and they share their way with all sincerely interested individuals. You can read about the Silver Elves in the book "Faery Craft" by Emily Carding.
The Silver Elves are a family of elves who have been living and sharing the Elven Way since 1975. They are the authors of
They support themselves via writing books on how to become an Elf:
And if you didn't know already, I am OtherKin, ElvenKin, and have been since 1987.
Most of the philosophies of Elfdom that you see Quaraun saying in the Quaraun series, comes from the teachings of The Silver Elves, and in several of the Quaraun novels, you see, Quaraun, a Moon Elf, questioned by other characters who ask him point blank: "Are you a Silver Elf" which is a direct reference to The Silver Elves who had a hand in inspiring much of the way I built the Moon Elf Society of the Quaraun series.
And this by the way is me as I look every day, in case you didn't know what I dress like...
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Like I said, Absurdism is far more then a genre in literature... there is an entire movement built up around it, that encompases far more then novels and short stories, and spans music, theatre, and lifestyle. And NONE of it is based on comedy.
The people who write Comedy and Humour and try to pass it off as Absurdist Fiction have no clue what The Movement of he Absurd even is, what it is about, or why it is we do the things we do.
We exist, not to make you laugh, but to make you think... to challenge you to your own bigotries, you own prejudices, and expose you for the monsters you really are.
Do you know how many times I get beaten up by random strangers, simply because of the way I dress? And that there alone, proves the point, we of The Absurd, are trying to make. The point that Humanity is cold, cruel, and inherently evil. That Humanity is prone to mindless violence and brutality for the sake of nothing more then to be violent for violence sake.
Think about it. WHY do random strangers gang up on and beat into a coma, some they don't know, simply because they don't like the way that person dresses?
The Absurd exists to act as a mirror for Humanity to look into and see itself for the vile, cruel, judgmental, bigoted, hate filled, perversion it really is. And if your novels and short stories do not send that message out, than what you have written, is NOT Absurdist Fiction.
Absurdists know that the Human Race is a corruption of violence against itself. We know this because we have seen it, again, and again, and again and...
We of the Absurd our fed up with the Human race and want no part of it. That is why we write what we do. We are not trying to be funny. we are trying to find a reason to live in a world that has proven it quite simply wants us dead.
Why am I personally fed up with Humanity?
Let me count the ways...
NaNoWriMo employee Kendra Silvermander, a member of the Ku Klux Klan, who claims to be a NaNoWriMo ML is wanted by the FBI for multiple terrorist attacks on local non-white & LGBTQ+ authors.
As a non-white person who lives with daily attacks by the Ku Klux Klan .... daily attacks meaning:
Yes... I've survived FIVE (5) bombings now.
Why do I write The Absurd?
That is why I write the Absurd. Because I have lost faith in Humanity and wish all of Humanity would die. Humans are cruel heartless beasts. Vile creatures who do nothing but kill, steal, and destroy ... and I want no part of those vicious monsters that call themselves Humans. Humans are evil incarnate and nothing less, and I remove myself from them, their society and their vile, depreciable race.
I have seen what it means to be Human and I am not evil enough to call myself Human.
If you can find a reason to laugh, then you can find a reason to smile, then you, my friend, still have a reason to live...and you have no business even trying to write The Absurd.
We who write Absurdist Fiction, we long ago lost the will to live, long ago lost the ability to laugh, long ago lost the ability to smile. We've been used and abused to much, too many times, to fins any joy in the prospect of living along side the monstrous beasts who call themselves Humans.
If you want to go to the source, Liberace literally created the live movement of Absurdism on stage....in the 1940s.
>Could anyone maybe give me some tips on how to get started?
Writing it?
How to get started?
To write The Absurd, basically all you need is a Social Issue that you want to focus on spreading awareness about, and the desire to write it in such a way that it is very over the top. You want to tell it in such a bizarre and fantastical way, that your readers step back and say: "OMG! I never thought of it that way before!"
If you want to spread awareness about suicide for example, you would write a story in which a primary character commits suicide, graphically, on page, in such an over the top way, that the reader goes: "OMG! hat the hell just happened?" You then want to show the extreme over the top reactions his friends and family have to his suicide.
The difference between writing a suicide awareness story in Absurdist Fiction and one in a more mainstream genre, is you can go totally off the wall... for example, you can write a story about a tree, who watches a construction crew clear cutting other trees. This one tree is left alone. All his tree friends are gone. Now the tree becomes depressed and during a storm tries to uproot itself or tries to get hit by lightning... the tree somehow commits suicide.
The birds who nested in it mourn it's passing. The house the tree is built out of, hates the Humans who live in it because they caused the tree's death. The Humans are haunted by the spirit of the tree that possesses the floorboards and calls the birds to come peck their eyes out.
The more bizarre you make it the better. Instead of the birds who lived in it's branches, tell of the fish who lived in it's branches. Though it was a pine tree, tell of the bananas who grew on it and also mourn that they now have no place to grow. Instead of being Humans, make the construction workers oysters. The sky is red, the grass is purple, and lollipops rain from the clouds. It doesn't matter.
The goal is to hide the suicide message so deep, that the reader, after reading the story debates with their friends asking: "So what do you think this story means?"
Just take a social issue and write a bizarre twist on it, fill it with symbolism, bury it under a surreal wrapper, and drive your readers mad with the desire to figure out what the hidden meaning is. Writing Absurdism is that simple.
>Could anyone maybe give me some tips on how to get started?
As is looking to get started reading it?
Well, I already gave you a list if several to read, so go back to the top of this page and scroll down again to find them.
You can read the ones I write.
Everything from the Twisted Tales short story series is Absurdism.
Wasted Time and Lucky #7 are the 2 that my fans requested the most as their favorites thus why Kindle reprint editions became available. Sand Castle is probably the most twisted of all.
I write Absurdist Bizarro Fantasy novels, you can read the free online sample chapters here:
I suppose I could tell you more about this series since it is my top selling series, as well as my longest running series, spaning 130 novels.
Perhaps giving you the details of what it is about and such, will help you to formulate your own ideas for writing Absurdism?
Early volumes of the series (1970s through 1980s) were published via limited edition short run local vanity press, and thus were not available to the mass market. Later volumes of the series (1997 to 2012) were published via FanFiction.net and was popular mostly with English speak, Japanese readers. The current reprints (2014 to 2017+) are available on Amazon Kindle and Amazon Paperback Beta and sells predominantly in Japan, Germany, and Brazil, with fewer than 2% of sales going to the rest of the world and 97% of all American sales being returned.
Originally known as The Twighlight Manor Series, it was renamed The Quaraun series in 2014, after I got fed with receiving tens of thousands of emails misdirected to me via fans of Twilight. (This was due to a fan website misquoting my email address and the email address of the author of Twilight, apparently after they found my website and mistook my Twighlight Manor series for the Twilight series instead.) Renaming the series seems to have worked, because from 2008 onward I was receiving tens of thousands of emails and in total received more then 9 million Edward related emails. However from 2014 onwards, after changing the name of the series from The Twighlight Manor series (the name it was since 1978) to The Quaraun series, I have not received a single Eddy fan-mail.
Amazon has the Quaraun series listed under several categories:
When I published it, I listed it under:
How Amazon determined the other categories is a mystery to me.
While I agree with most of the categories Amazon decided to place it in, I believe these two to be inaccurate:
I would not classify it as Romance of any type, gay, transgender, or otherwise, but, those are the categories Amazon decided to put it in.
The Quaraun series is about 3 travelling wizards. (Two High Elves and a sex crazed Unicorn.)
Frequently traveling with:
Quaraun has a pet dragon whom he resurrected as a Lich after she died:
Other characters they meet throughout the series include:
You start to see a trend in the naming process that goes into naming characters in Absurdism, right?
Unlike typical Fantasy, the High Elves are called High because they are drug addicts. One, the world's most powerful and most feared necromancer, wears eye-popping neon pink sequins ball gowns and feather boas and spends most of his days resurrecting dead roses and trying to avoid being raped by the sex crazed purple unicorn who is also his drug dealer.
When he's not wandering the planet aimlessly, he lives in a lighthouse that's shaped like a giant errect, pink, dick. Lots of things in the series are shaped like pink dicks. It's also difficult to turn a page without being faced with the word penis, cock, dick, testicals, or balls.
The unicorn is himself a wizard, who lives in a gingerbread house that falls out of the sky and lands wherever, whenever...he doubles as Santa's chef and built Santa's gingerbread village.
The 3rd wizard is a teenaged Dungeon Master from the 1970s who grow up with hippies, and one day while his hippie gang were escaping a police drug raid, he jumped in his LSD filled 1974 AMC Gremlin to discover the car was a time machine that tossed him back to 1400's Quebec, where he now lives with the pink necromancer and his sex crazed unicorn.
As many readers have (correctly) pointed out the series reads disjointedly. Scenes do not flow smoothly one to the next and often read as though soething is missing.
Additionally there are no chapters.
Each novel stands on it's own, not connected to any others and is a stand alone story not a continuing serial.
Each story is told by a series of scenes, from the perspective of the main character, Quaraun.
Most scenes start with Quaraun waking up and wondering where he is and how he got there.
Each scene reads like it is it's own story and as readers pointed out, feels not connected to the rest of the story. This is because of multiple things:
All of these things combine to result in Quaraun has difficulty staying awake. And yet he is the point of view character. Because he passes out multiple times a day, you see every scene start with him waking up and looking around and wondering where he is and what happened. Sometimes it takes him only a few seconds to come to his senses and move on with the story. Sometimes he is suffering from memory lapse and it takes an entire scene or more for him to get back on track to where he was previously in the story.
But then once the story gets back on track, it makes not be back on track at all, and the scenes suddenly devolve into a waking nightmare that Quaraun can not run from, with Quaraun talking to people, visiting places, and seeing things that simply are not there at all. The reader is led to believe that what Quaraun just experienced, really happened, because Quaraun believe it really happened and Quaraun is the point of view character. However, these scenes are in fact not happening at all. Quaraun is talking to no one, seeing nothing and going no where, all the while his friends are trying to snap him out of the LSD induced state he is in...but the reader does not know this because Quaraun doesn't know this.
The entire Quaraun series passes in a dream like state of never knowing what is real and what isn't.
One of the more disturbing aspects of the Quaraun series is when this dreamstate of disconnected scenes is suddenly intersected by something very out of place for a 1400's Medieval Fantasy, and then the reader suddenly realizes WHY he is called Quaraun The Insane....
See the following scene for an example of one of these scene disruptions:
“Ya could order shrimp,” Unicorn said.
“I don't eat shrimp,” Quaraun complained.
“I is ordering shrimp,” Unicorn said.
“Heaven's no! It would be cannibalism!” ZooLock gasped.
“Yeah, I is no fish like ya two be. I wants shrimp.”
“I'm not a fish,” Quaraun stated.
“Oh, I sorry. I thought JellyFish were fish seeing how they gots fish in the name.”
“I'm not a fish either,” ZooLock proclaimed while waving several tentacles in the air.
“No?”
“No!”
“Then what is ya?”
“I am a mollusc.”
“What the difference?”
“We are intelligent.”
“Ah! Then ya will nae mind me eating the shrimp.”
“What are you ordering,” the server asked, still waiting for an answer.
“I having shrimp,” Unicorn answered. “They is being pussies.”
“Unicorn,” Quaraun growled.
“I not doing nothing.”
“You're trying to start a fight.”
“Fuck off.”
"I am tired."
"Arrrgh! arrgh! Arrgh! Oh god! Fuck me! Damn! Faster! Faster! Oh fucking stick a cock!"
Unicorn jumped up and ran screaming around the room.
Quaraun sighed.
"Why are Faeries like this?"
"Being undead would be fine if people would just stop pointing and screaming every time they saw me," Unicorn said. "Besides, ya're imagining half this."
"Am I?" Quaraun opened his eyes and stared up at the sky.
A woman ran from the kitchen followed by a billow of smoke from the burning popcorn in the microwave.
"FIRE!" she screamed. "Fire in the microwave!"
"Microwave?" Unicorn asked. "What is microwave."
...
"Wait... microwave?"
Harrier interrupted the boy.
"Microwave," Sunta said, drifting off into a daze.
"Uhm...Sunta," Harrier leaned forward, and tried to get the boy's attention. "This is happening in a tavern in the 1400s."
"Yep."
"Microwaves have not been invented yet."
"Yep."
"So, we're going with a microwave?"
"Yep."
Harrier, sat up and looked around the room. There was a microwave sitting on the counter. A nurse was popping popcorn in it.
"I see."
Harrier sighed. Talking to Sunta was difficult. His mind rarely stayed on focus. The fact that Sunta spoke in a long dead language and had injuries that make speaking difficult, didn't help.
"Microwave," Harrier muttered as he wrote something in his notes.
Sunta was incredibly unreliable when it came to relating a story. He seemed less reliable today than usual.
"Problem?" Gremlin asked the psychiatrist.
"Maybe," Harrier answered. "He seems to think there was a microwave in the tavern."
Gremlin looked at the microwave on the nurse's counter.
"Hmmm. Maybe there was."
"In the 1400s."
"Why not?"
"Did you take a microwave back in time and change history?"
"Possibly."
"Gremlin..."
"I need to fix inconsistencies in the past to correct the future," the old half-Demon said. "So changing microwave oven, and popcorn to... ??? Would the women have been stupid enough to try to cook their shrimp dinners in the oven instead of boiling them in a pot?"
(Read the rest here: Back At The Tavern and Still No Shrimp)
~From "The Summoner of Darkness" (Volume 11 of The Quaraun Series)
Quaraun (known as Sunta in the modern world) is an unreliable narrator.
Quaraun is the one telling the story... but he's not telling it to you the reader, he's telling it to a psychiatrist named Harrier, from White Rock Asylum For The Criminally Insane.
Quaraun is a serial killer, who in the year 2525 is wanted for the murder of 30 billion people, across 3 solar systems. He is responsible for something called "The Battle of Ongadada", and the entire Quaraun series, is a team of psychiatrists, trying to get him to tell them what happened, why he did it, in an attempt to use a time machine, go back to the past and stop him from doing it, by stopping the events that caused him to go on his murderous killing spree.
Quaraun is a very dangerous wizard who can kill simply by saying: "I wish you were dead", which is exactly what he did the day his wife and children were murdered. He wish the entire Human race out of existence, and the Faeries, lead by Harrier are trying to stop this from happening, but the only way they can, if to find out why he did it in the first place, and thus you have the Quaraun series... a series of disconnected stories, told by an insane Elf to his psychiatrists.
The series spans 130 volumes of them battling such things as pink feathered zombie turkeys, flying pink Elf-eating gold-fish, snapping turtles the size of houses, 1960s TV superheroes BatDude and Pigeon Poop Boy falling out of portals, the Grateful Dead's rainbow dancing teddy bears marching along in a Five Nights of Freddy' murder spread while wearing their sequined g-strings; the green haired porn star pole dancing super villain known as The Jiggler, vampire leprechauns, and then of course there are the bananas and sheep for which the series has become legendary for.
(If you are squeamish about weird things being stuffed up an Elf's ass, you probably want to avoid all the ones that feature bananas, candy canes, pickles, and sheep. The unicorn likes molesting the Elf with anything he has on hand)
When the 3 wizards need to jump across oceans they have their purple sailed Pirate-Ship-Rent-A-Prize and it's Tinker Gnome crew: Captain Quirk, Mr. Slhock, Dr. Macaw, Mr. Kink-Off, and Mr. Biscotti.
The time period changes mid story as they are frequently getting sucked into portals and spit out in the ancient past the distant future or on some planet on the other side of the galaxy.
They find themselves in cities that worship slushies, in villages made out of cake, in forests where mac&cheese grows on trees...
And even though the 3 of them are all male, the main character gets pregnant... twice.
And he doesn't just get pregnant, no, that'd be too normal. This is Absurd Literature we are talking about here. He get's pregnant and gives birth to 3,000 squid headed, tentacled, flying unicorns.
Why?
Because it's Bizzarro. Why have pregnent men when you can have men pregnent with 3,000 tentacle monsters instead?
Oh... and did I mention the unicorn is a double dicked unicorn? He can fuck his Elf with both penises at the same time.
Yes. It's absurd. I know. But that is the very nature of Absurdist Fiction.
Absurdist Fiction is not here to make you laugh, it's here to make you go: What the hell Why? Just... why? Omg, WHY?
All the while they are trying to help an army of talking cats from outer space prevent a disaster that ends the world in 2525, while also trying to avoid being eaten by squid headed brain sucking tentacle beasts from Neptune's moon.
And if that wasn't all bad enough, the series is Yaoi with the 3 wizards being lovers, and it's also Dub-Con Hentia Monster Porn, so everything is trying to rape the main character, and often does.
Every novel in the series features certain events: a rape scene, a murder scene, a cannibal eating someone, and one of the 3 main characters committing suicide.
These are the dominate themes seen over and over and over again in all Absurd Fiction: murder, rape, suicide, incest, drugs, peadophiles, cults, and the monsters who eat them when the justice system fails to protect the victims.
If you think The Absurd exists only to make you laugh... then you have a lot to learn about The Absurd and how to write it. This is not a genre for the weak willed, faint hearted, or squeamish.
The Absurd takes things people in the real world, turn a blind eye to and pin points then with the clarity of a high powered microscope forcing the reader to see the darkest side of life, front and center.
Common in Absurd novels is running gags, not written to be funny, but written to attract the reader's attention to the fact that something is very seriously wrong with the world... not the world in the novel, but rather the real world we live in. Which is why you see things like a dead character, returning over and over again, no matter how many times other characters murder him.
The body that won't stay dead is a common theme in The Absurd, and it not meant to make you laugh, but rather is there to make you look beyond the returning dead body to the real world issue behind it.
In every novel of my Quaraun series you can guarantee the unicorn will be murdered...always. Always a different way -beheaded, stabbed to death, stung to death by bees, drowned, strangled, hung, shot, tossed off a cliff....and if the novel reaches its end without him dying, he'll commit suicide.
Think of it like Kenny in SouthPark.
He dies in every novel. But the main character is a necromancer so he comes back in each next novel so he can be killed all over again.
But how does he die? That's the thing to look at.
In one novel he, a shapeshifter, appears as a black man and is beaten to death by white supremacists.
In another novel is dies of a horrific drug overdose.
Another novel sees him raped to death by a gang of thugs.
In another his is strung up by gay haters.
His deaths are violent, brutal, and never without meaning. Always his death is a slap in the face to some current news report of a murder brought about by bigotry and hate.
There is ALWAYS a social justice message in EVERY tale of the Absurd... ALWAYS.
To bring about awareness of the harsh realities of the world with live in, is the very heart and soul of Absurd Fiction.
There is no author of The Absurd, who is not also a Social Justice Warrior. There is not story in Absurdist Literature that doesn't have a moral to tell.
If you are only looking to make people laugh... you are looking at the WRONG genre. We of The Absurd exist for one purpose and purpose only: The shock the world into change, to make our world a better place to live, by turning the world inside out and showing you it's bloody, gory inside, for awful truth they really are.
In spite of it's pretty pink, cartoon child like cover art, the series is a non stop blood bath massacre of murder, rape, and suicide in increasing bizarre methods. There's a reason the series can not be sold to readers under 18 in countries that have book rating laws.
The Quaraun series is Absurdism on the extreme.
It pushes boundaries.
When it finds a boundary it has not yet crossed, it crosses it twice just to make sure it annoyed every read possible.
Absurdism exist to shock.
Absurdism is not trying to make you laugh, it's trying to make you run away screaming for eyebleach.
Comedy makes you laugh.
Absurdism makes you run away shaking your foot, trying to wipe every last trace of it off.
In Comedy characters make fart jokes.
In Absurdism characters take a dump on the page.
In Comedy a character jokes about pissing on your shoes.
In Absurdism, the character just walks up to you and pisses on your shoe without any warning.
In Comedy you laugh at pink lady slipper flowers because they look like vaginas.
In Absurdism, the flowers actually are vaginas and the character fucks them.
Absurdism takes everything the conservative white Christian says is evil and writes it as much as possible.
Absurdism is fun, not funny. There is a difference.
Humor tries to make you laugh.
Absurdity is there to shock, absurdity is ridiculous for ridiculousness sake.
People who find Absurdity funny are worrisome people - for they are the ones who laugh when someone gets hurt and feel nothing when someone dies. Few can comprehend the meaning behind Absurd Fiction and even fewer find it funny.
Offensive is how most people describe Absurd Literature.
If Absurd Fiction had a primary goal, to offend it's readers would be that goal.
One only has to look at the synonyms of Absurdity to see that comedy and humor are not things this genre is about:
While Absurdity can be funny, it is not meant to be funny as it has a moral to tell.
Even the wizard who can shoot fireballs from his nipples, has a deep, dark hidden message behind his flamboyant nipples.
I started writing it in 1978 - it celebrates it's 40th anniversary next year. It's been around a while, but not a lot of people read Absurdism, so it's never been overly popular. Most of my readers are in Japan, Germany, and Brazil. Not many American or European readers are into Bizarro and Absurdist fiction, so sales in US are slim at best.
Americans take themselves way too seriously. The fact that Absurd Fiction does not even get sold in bookstores is proof of that.
You think you want to write Absurdity? Well good for you! But know you have a long hard road ahead of you. Most publishers will not touch it, and publishers are the least of your troubles. Americans really HATE authors of the Absurd a lot. A bomb blew up my house, remember? Americans HATE Absurd literature with a vengeance, because for decades it's been the front runner of LGBTQ+ Literature. Until recently Absurdity was the only place you could feature LGBTQ+ characters.
In the 1970s if you tried to write a gay man in mainstream genres, you'd have lynch mobs after you. The idea that a man could be gay was so absurd that gay men were only allowed to exist in Absurd Fiction, thus why most characters within Absurdity are LGBTQ even today.
If you want to write Absurd Fiction to be funny, then honey, you ain't got a clue what Absurd Fiction is.
But... it's not comedy or humor, though in Japan most bookstores shelve t as Pink Humour Yaoi (which basically translates into crude dick jokes for female readers).
So, it not being comdey, means it might not be the sort of thing you are looking for.
There is quite a big difference between comedy/humour and Absurdity.
Absurdism tends to fall more in the lines of Surreal Splatter Punk, then Comedy.
Comedy tries to tell jokes. It's tells you fish fly because it's funny to pull your leg.
Absurdism, tells you that a tree can talk and fish can fly, and it's dead serious about it. The fish really are flying.
Absurdism falls into Rhetoric fiction that makes the reader think deep thoughts about big issues. Thus you see dark themes about drug use and suicide heavily focused on in Absurdism, whereas in Comedy talking about such things is taboo.
Absurdism is avant garde and artsy-fartsy. It goes over the top, crosses lines, then crosses them again. It treats normally taboo topics like incest and beastility as though they were normal.
In Absurdism a man can marry a sheep and no one bats an eye. In any other genre sex with sheep brands that character as a demented bad guy.
In Absurdism, Elves having sexual relationships with Horses is normal.
Absurdism walks across taboos them stomps them in the mud for good measure. It stretches the limits and forces readers to take a new look at things/topics/issues they would normally ignore. It heavily uses and abuses political themes and controversial news topics.
For example in the 1980s a common theme in Absurdism was for Animals to run test labs and be doing horrific tests on Humans.
A typical sort of story you can expect to see in Absurdism, is for a group of poachers to go polar bear hunting, only to be gunned down by a walrus that is poaching Human heads.
One of the most well known "classic" Absurdist stories is "The Little Penguin" an online flash game visual novel. About a penguin that accident kills another penguin and feels such a rush, that he grabs a chainsaw and starts mass murdering every penguin on the island.
Here... you can watch it for yourself... off to go find it.
Ah... I found it... had to do some searching... got the name wrong, that's why I couldn't find it.
It's "The Littlest Penguin"
but yeah, here you go, this is considered the IDEAL example of Absurdist Fiction that other works should look up to and strive for...
Viewer discretion strongly advised...
If you make it to the end (most people can't) you'll see quite starkly that Absurdism is NOT comedy, NOT humor, and focuses instead on taking a deeply disturbing theme and running with it at though it was the most normal thing in the world... in this case, focusing on the theme here of "What happens when you give penguins chainsaws?"
Let's go back to Alice in Wonderland.
On the surface it seems like an inocent children's story.
But keep in mind it was written in a time when there was no such thing as a children's story. And that it was written by a man with an unhealthy obsession with a little girl named Alice. Her family moved several times to get away from their child's stalker, but he followed them everywhere, writing love letters to their 8 year old daughter.
Alice in Wonderland was the bizarre promise of an adult male, to an 8 yer old girl, the promise of her coming with him and life being an adventure through wonderland.
Have you ever read the book?
Do you even know what it is about?
A little girl is drugged several times, after falling down a well, where she meets a mad man and a rabbit who verbally abuse her. She escapes by is chased down by a dragon and a bloodthirsty evil woman, she must escape from.
The author wrote a fantasy of a little girl's escape from her evil mother who refused to let said 8 year old marry a man in his 30s.
Alice in Wonderland is dark... very, very, very dark, when you look at the meaning of the book and how and why he wrote it. Many shocked and horrified parents, once they learn the truth behind the story, refuse to allow their children to have anything to do with this paedophiles drug filled fantasy about 8 year old girls.
The thing with Alice in Wonderland is it is so strange, so bizarre, so off the wall, that people were too dazzled by the absurdity of it to see the hidden story hiding just under the surface.
Like Alice, Absurdist Fiction hinges on the author's ability to hide deep horrors wrapped cheerfully in bright colours.
Alice in Wonderland is considered by many to be the very first Absurdist tale written and for this reason is often used as the measuring rod for other Absurdist tales.
For this reason drugs, unhealthy sex obsessions, and child abuse are the most common front and center themes seen in Absurdists fiction.
If you are not hiding some deep dark secret under the surface of your absurdity, then you are not writing Absurdist Fiction. Absurdist Fiction does not exist as a meaningless story with no rhyme nor reason. If that's what you are writing, then Surealism is what you are looking for.
Absurdism, gives you a wild misdirection, to distract you from seeing it's gorey, horey truth.
Absurdism is often very dark, very gruesome, and very bloody, with flesh eating serial killers as heroes in worlds that gloryfy their bloody acts.
Absurdism takes the world we know and love and tosses it on it's side, making terrorists the world leaders and sending monsters loose on the world.
Most Absurdism has more in common with Horror then it does Comedy.
Want to see Absurdism at it's best? Read the king of Absurdism:
The Call of Cthulhu by H.P.Lovecraft.
Could anyone maybe give me some tips on how to get started?
Do you mean as in how to get started writing it?
Again, the website I just linked to is what you want. It's pretty much the ONLY website on the internet that teaches how to write Absurdism, Bizarro, and Psychedelic Fantasy. The site has more than 10,000 pages, with more than 6,000 pages devoted to teaching new writers various aspects of writing in general and writing Psychedelic Bizarro Absurdism in particular.
If you are looking to get started writing Absurdism, this page is probably the best one to start out with as it gives you a rather intro look at how the writing process comes about in this type of non-standard genre:
This page gives you more info on how I build the random absurdism found in the novels:
This page details how to write Lovecraftian alien and demon languages like what is typically seen in Absurdist Literature:
Absurdism features a high rate of graphic, gruesome, bloody violence against children, as I said before, this is a genre that pushed limits and you see themes you would not normally see in other genres, such as a father ritualistically murdering his children on page. This page talks about how to deal with writing such horrific topics, as few people are able to stomach writing this sort of thing and often struggle with their own emotions when they attempt to write it.
This page shows you how I create the backfiring magic used by the world's most powerful wizard... who can't geth's spells right because he's too high on drugs to cast the spells properly...
Because there are so many thousands of pages it get be a bit overwhelming to find pages, so there are several indexes, linking groups of pages by category.
These are probably the indexes you'll want to start out with:
The beat sheets I use for writing can be found HERE
In spite of the site having 10,000+ pages, and writing Bizarro being what it's about, there are no pages on the topic of writing comedy or humor because, I don't write comedy or humour, I write Absurdist Bizarro.
Like I said before though, I focus on teaching how to write Weird Horror, Bizarro, Absurdism, and Monster Porn. None of which is comedy or humour, so, this may not be what you are looking for, given that your post expresses a desire to write Absurdism because you want to write Humor.
I'm not sure what you read that made you think Absurdism was funny, humorous, or a type of comedy...because Absurdism is not those things and you'll likely be disappointed if you pursue it thinking it is those things.
I think it may be possible that what you want to write is in fact Satire or Comedy and not Absurdism.
If you do want to get started in Absurdism, those links I gave you should get you started and from them you can find lots of other links. Like I said, that site has 10k+ pages so there's a LOT there once you start looking around.
The Space Dock 13 WebRing
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What do you want to become?
What did you do today to step closer to that goal?
Whatever you do, be your best at it!
And remember to have yourself a great and wonderfully glorious day!
~EK
EelKat.com
pinterest.com/eelkat/
Evil men go out of their way to try to drive a person to suicide.
Are you an evil man?
Are you sure you're not?
How many people have YOUR hate filled words killed?
Next time you go to do a mean thing to a fellow human, stop and really think about the consequences of your actions.
Did you ever notice how every one has a story to tell about me, yet not one of them ever speaks the truth?
What lies has YOUR gossiping tongue spread about me?
Did you know...
October 16, 2006, bomb blew up my house because of YOUR lies.
August 8, 2013, the house which replaced the one the bomb blew up, was driven over by a backhoe.
November 14, 2013, my 8 month old infant son was murdered because of your lies.
November 14, 2013, I was beaten up, paralized for 5 months, spent 18 weeks relearning to walk, I'm now crippled for the rest of my life, because of YOUR lies.
Are you proud of what you have done?
Enjoy your eternity in Hell. You earned it. You've certainly worked hard for it.
~EelKat
If you have any information about any of these events, please call FBI Agent Andy Drewer at 207-774-9322
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