Congratulations!
You have reached Maine's largest and most trafficked website.
As of February 2021, we are now getting up to 7 MILLION visits per day!
This is the home page of
Maine author, artist, Voodoo Priestess, Gypsy Queen, and art car designer:
EelKat Wendy Christine Allen.
This website started in 1996 and is updated, edited, and added to daily.
As of 2021 it has more than 10,000 pages. However, only around 2,000 pages are indexed by search engines (robot blockers and/or passwords, prevent the rest from being findable by Google/Bing/Yahoo/etc.). Around 8,000 pages can only be accessed by clicking on direct links to them. The links are found on other pages on this site. Confusing? Perhaps. But whenever one of those difficult to find 8,000 pages gets traffic, I know that you are VERY dedicated in reading what I wrote or doing some stalker level digging to reach those search engine inaccessible pages and I'd rather not waste my time writing stuff for uninterested parties, plus it's fascinating to see how deep some people are willing dig to find every last word I wrote.
I published my first novel in 1978. Since than I have published 138 novels, 30 non-fiction books, 2,000+ short stories, a dozen plays, a few comic book scripts for Disney's Uncle Scrooge and Donald Duck comics, a few dozen novellas, and 10,000+ non-fiction articles.
I am asexual and famous for 4 decades of writing 100% sexless stories, laced in extreme blood-gore-and-violence. But in spite of that, in recent years, most people classify me as an Erotica author. I don't know why, as I've never written Erotica or even any sex scenes, and as I am a nun, raised as such from the age of 3, I wouldn't even know how to write sex or Erotica. If you came here looking for sex, BDSM, Erotica, or Dominatrix's, please return to whomever sent you and tell them to burn in Hell where their immoral ass belongs. Also, do tell me their name so I can put a curse on them, so they will never enjoy sex ever again, to punish them for spreading lies about me and connecting my name to anything related to sex at all. I find sex vile and despicable and want no part of your perverse degradation near me.
All of my fiction works are about Alien Elf Wizards who live in Old Orchard Beach, Maine. All of my non-fiction works are about the history of Maine, it's Gypsy Clans, and most especially Old Orchard Beach the town which was settled and founded by my family.
Most of these pages answer reader questions on the worldbuilding, character creating, plotting, writing, editing, and publishing process of my work.
Others are on the history of my people, The Gypsies of Maine, our culture, our lifestyle, our cars, and our religion.
The rest of the pages are daily updates of the terrorist attacks by Maine's White Supremacists on my non-white family, including updates of the FBI investigation of the April 10, 2015 kidnapping and murder of my children.
The bulk of this website is a massive database of how-to articles for anyone looking to write and publish Dark Fantasy & Weird Horror.
Some stuff is indexed. Most stuff isn't. The links below take you to the most popular/most visited pages. Each of them contains more links to more pages. That should get you started.
Enjoy your stay!
Let's answer a reader question, right here in the header:
>>>Wait, I just realized that 2,000 short stories plus 138 novels times minimum 27,000 sales each volume equals to 57 million sales. Have you really sold over 57 million copies of the Quaraun books? Those are Harry Potter and Stephen King level sales figures. I didn't realize you were that big of a best seller!
Yes.
If Stephen King didn't live in Maine, I would be Maine's #1 top selling author.
And there are a lot of local people in Old Orchard Beach, Saco, and Biddeford, Maine kicking themselves right now, as they read this and realize they've been harassing my family, while literally MILLIONS of people around the world have been watching, and before they, these idiot locals, visited this my website, they had no idea, how famous I really was, or how famous they themselves now are for being bullies. You can read the rest here.
Let's answer another...
>>>I have an author web site. How do you get so much traffic? I barely get 200 visits a month.
Answer #1: I started this website in 1996. It's one of the oldest writing how-to web sites on the internet. This web existed BEFORE Google did. This website was online before Yahoo was around. It's that old. We've changed servers and url names several times, but the fact remains, I created/still own not only one of the first writing sites to ever exist, but one of the first websites to EVER be made PERIOD. And when it comes to search engines after 2010's Panda - age of the website trumps EVERYTHING else, keywords and most traditional SEO advice don't mean shit no more.
The fact remains, this website is older than a good 80% of people who use the internet today. It was around before most of today's internet users were even born.
Wait 10 or 12 years. Post daily that entire time, and by than, you'll have traffic like I do too.
Answer #2: I love Avallac'h. I've been a major fan of the Witcher franchise for a very long time, and there are several hundred pages on my website devoted to my screaming fan-girl love gushing for the Witcher franchise, particularly Avallac'h. Many of those pages are more than a decade old. In 2019, my site was getting around 100k views a month. Now in 2021, it's getting 7million views a day. What changed? The full details are on this page, but the quick summary this:
On December 21, 2019, Netflix released the Witcher TV show, and the next day, millions of people rushed to Google to type the search term "nude Netflix Ciri porn photos", because they're a bunch of pedophiles who wanted to search for nude photos of a 12 year old actress. Google sent them: HERE. (Obviously not photos of the actress as this page was created about 5 years before the Netflix series). And literally over night, my site got more traffic in a single hour, than it usually got each year. And within hours, the mass onslaught of hate emails started because you know, Ciri who never read the Witcher novels, didn't know Ciri and Avallac'h had sex in the novels and were horrified to see me use the game to create fan art of exactly that.
| Home | Site Index | Top 100 Pages | Search| About |
| Keywords & Pigeons: Or The Secret To Why I Get 7million Views Per Day and You Don't|
| The Adventures of The Pink Necromancer: Quaraun The Insane |
| Meet Quaraun | Meet BoomFuzzy | Meet GhoulSpawn | FAQs |
| Character motivation for becoming a drug dealer? | How To Stay Motivated To Write |
| Motivations of Super Villains of Organizations That Control The World |
| Age Difference In Marriage: The Fiction VS The Reality | Writing Polygamous and Polyamorous Characters |
|Giving Your Characters Flaws and Goals | Writing Taboos | Travel & World Size Fantasy Worldbuilding |
| Slice of Life Literary Fantasy - Soap Opera Drama of the Fantasy Genre |
| Question Everything Before Putting It In Your World |
| Americans Don't Want Diverse Books | Why Do Americans Hate Black People? (2016 ed.) |
| Writing Christian Characters Accurately To Real World Christians | Writing Prompt Syndrome |
| How long does it take to reach 1667 words? & 50k in one day - is it possible? | How Many Pages Per Day? |
| How to increase word count without making a story boring? | Your Population: World Building Writing Prompts |
| Overactive Reader Imaginations: Seeing Things I Did Not Write|
| Wait, why is Quaraun Rated M If It's Not Erotica and Contains No Sex Scenes? |
| Comparing The Wild Sex Crazed Rumors About Who I Am & What I Write, To Asexual I Actually Am & The Sexless Novels I Actually Write |
| BDSM? Dominatrix? Erotica? Boy Are You In The Wrong Place! |
| Wait, You DON'T Write Sex, But I Thought... | A Look At Twitch's Witch Hunting Culture |
| But Avallac'h... A Look At How Sex Crazed Fans Can Destroy Lives, When They See Sex In Places It Never Was |
|
| Who Is Avallac'h? | Ciri or Lara? | | But Ciri is The Chosen One, She's Like Jesus! | | The Avallac'h Playthrough Challenge | |
| Mistakes People Make While Playing Witcher 3| | Why Americans Should NOT Read The Witcher Novels | | How can you like Avallac'h? He's a Polygamist! | |
| How Does a Destitute Homeless Man Get Accused of Being Wealthy?| Twitch Follower vs Viewer Counts |
| I Came Here Looking For Vampire Strippers, But Than I Found Out You Were An Asexual Catholic Nun |
| Can I Visit You? | The Most Bizarre Question I've Ever Been Asked & The Answer You Didn't Want To Hear |
| How Did The FBI Get Involved? | What Is The Mafia Connection? | What Religion Are You? |
| Meet The Scottish Travellers | Stephen King's Thinner Gypsies - The Complete Interviews |
| Amphibious Aliens | Meet The Real Christine: The World's Most Haunted Car |
Ten Kidnapped Cats
Ten Kidnapped Cats
Most Recent Pictures Of My Cats
The following pictures were taken on May 14, 2015, when the police officer who confessed to doing the majority of the damage and vandalism, let me go to the kennel where my cats were being held hostage to see them. You can see from the photos, the horrific living conditions my cats have been kept in these past 4 months since they were kidnapped on April 10, 2015. Each cat is being kept in a cage that is not even big enough for them to move.
The cats are shown from oldest to youngest:
Georgie - age 15
Emily - age 15
Mittens - age 15
Bela Lugosi - age 14
Dog - age 10
Fizzgig - age 9
Kewpie - age 6
Blackie - age 5
Sprout - age 5
Pipsisewah (Pippi) - age 5
Full details on how, when, and why the cats were kidnapped can be found ON THIS PAGE.
The cats are currently be held hostage HERE.
These senior house cats are being listed as feral barn cats, a fact that I find very upsetting. The description they have placed on my cats is as follows:
Desperately Seeking Barns
FoFF currently has dozens of feral cats, who will be fixed and vaccinated, needing country or semi-rural homes with barns or other outbuildings to relocate to. These cats will lose their feeders but cannot be fixed and relocated until they have places to go. (Which could mean more new kittens in the meantime.) Please help us by adopting 1, 2 or even a small group. In turn they will keep your barn free of rodents and other critters. Usual donation of $40 per cat reduced to what you can afford so we can help as many as possible. Help us get these guys into homes before winter!
Please help--the need is great!
Contact apfish255@gmail.com or call 797-3014.
A feral cat is one that has lived apart from humans for so long that it is not socialized to humans. It has been abandoned or was born in the wild and has lived so long in the wild that it is not a candidate for adoption into a home.
A stray cat, on the other hand, is a domestic cat that has been abandoned or lost. It can usually be socialized to live with humans again in a home.
Feral cats are best suited to living outdoors with shelter in a safe place, food, and water. If they are vaccinated against rabies and spayed or neutered, they can live a contented life.
Uncared-for feral cats may struggle to live and eat, are subject to accidents and illness, inclement weather, and injuries from fights with other cats. Feral kittens up to 8 or 10 weeks of life can be socialized to live in homes, but not after this period.
The best way to help feral cats is TNR, a program of
Got mice? Put feral cats to work for you, in exchange for room and board!
Many feral cats are not likely to be be suitable as indoor housecats, but you can still give them a safe, warm home in your barn, and in exchange, they'll keep the rat and mouse population under control.
We're always looking for homes in barns, garages, sheds, or other outbuildings for feral cats who must be relocated from their colonies.
All FoFF barn cats are vaccinated and spayed or neutered. We recommend the adoption of two or more from the same colony so they have the companionship they need.
We ask that cats be given dry cat food and fresh water every day, and they must be contained for one week or longer in a large wire kennel (which FoFF can provide), to allow them to acclimate to their new environment.
Do you see what those monsters are saying about my DOMESTIC HOUSE CATS that LIVED WITH ME FOR 15 YEARS!
These people are so racist and so bigoted against Gypsies that they don't even consider us humans. Do you see what they said?
A feral cat is one that has lived apart from humans for so long that it is not socialized to humans. It has been abandoned or was born in the wild and has lived so long in the wild that it is not a candidate for adoption into a home.
In the eyes of these people, I am not a human, they admit it right on their web site.
These monster broke into my home, ripped to door off, tore the furniture up and smashed it to pieces, shredded my sofa with a pitchfork, that they left in it when they left, shedded our bedding, and pumped hundreds of gallons of raw sewage into our house - on my bed, 3 feet deep on my floors, on my counters, on my walls, on my ceiling.
These vile, racist, hate filled monster did that to my house, and then took my cats, claiming that the house was already like that when they arrived.
Friends of Feral Felines and their violent, racist, hate filled criminal operation needs to be shut down.
These people PRETEND to help cats, but look at what they did, to take my cats. The violence, the vandalism. They are running a scam operation. These monsters break into peoples home while they are gone to work, trash their houses, fill their houses with sewage, and then call the police to illegally seize the cats and charge the owners will thousands of dollars in vet bills. Then they list the cats for sale on their website, claiming that the fees they charge of for the vet bills, that the owners ALREADY PAID FOR.
They beat my cats heads in, two of them are crippled for life now, and those bastards had the nerve to send me the $2,000 vet bill for the injuries they did to my cats.
How many other families has this criminal operation destroyed?
How many cats have they stolen away from their families?
How many homes have they broken into and trashed?
How many innocent people have they set up the way they set me up?
This has to stop.
This group must be shut down before they attack another innocent family.
This group must be shut down before they destroy more lives.
This group must be shut down before they hurt more cats.
And to think, I used to fund Friends of Feral Felines.
As the founder of the Proctor & Gamble Boycott, I declare a new boycott founded. From now on, we boycotters of P&G add a new company to our list: Friends of Feral Felines - may their vile criminal members spend eternity in hell forever having their heads beat in by cats.
Please get my cats away from these monsters and bring them home.
More Photos of My Cats Which These Lying Thieves Are Claiming Are Ferals Who Had No Contact With humans:
VERY old picture of Georgie and Emily, back in the house that was blown up by a grease fryer bomb on October 18, 2006... back in the days before I had a neighbor with a backhoe hell bent on putting a condominium on my land. yep - these cats are so old, I had them before the harasser moved to Maine. the man behind the sewage dumped in my house to frame me, thus why ten cats were taken on false charges, is the EXACT SAME man who has now run over 3 separate houses. This man has no morals whatsoever and sees nothing wrong with driving backhoes over our houses as fast as we build them.
Cats in motorhome - notice white flokati wall to wall carpeting - not a feces in sight, because I vacuumed daily.
Under the bed, sleeping on the flokati - notice how WHITE and CLEAN i kept the inside of my motorhome. (And how infuriated I am that the kidnapping bastards thought nothing of filling my home with feces and sewage and destroyed my white flokati in addition to kidnapping my cats.)
Bela - a few HOURS before the kidnappers destroyed our home and stole our cats.
Me, Bela, and Georgie - 2 days before kidnapping.
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