How We Gypsies See The Americans

How We Gypsies See The Americans
Re-release of USA Government Banned Book
Page 4

Do You Read Banned Books?
Want To Read The First Ever Books Banned By The United States Government?

How We Gypsies 
See The Americans
Memoirs of a Gypsy Queen
A Behind The Scenes Look Into The Everyday Life of 
The Scottish Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach, Maine
by 
EelKat Wendy C. Allen

Was One of The 27 Books
Banned By The United States Government
On January 4, 2016

It was forced to be unpublished
and removed from books stores
by a court order issued by
The Town Hall of The Town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine,
A United States of America Government Orginization

Banned from publication on Amazon, by the United States Government, How We Gypsies See The Americans, is now available to read online for free.

How We Gypsies See The Americans
Re-release of USA Government Banned Book
Page 4

My primary religion and magic practice is in fact the native Shamanic Hoodoo Folk Religion and Magic Arts of the Indigenous Scottish Highland Gypsies, which make up the bulk of my family history. And while it is a look at the traditions and culture of Scottish Gypsies, it is not a look at the traditions and cultures of ALL Scottish Gypsies, but rather the look inside one single solitary clan. There are many clans, each forming their own traditions over time and so while others may have similarities to us, they may also have vast differences.

While I am also Kickapoo, Cherokee, and a small bit of black from an escaped slave of unknown ancestry, I did in fact grow up with my Highland Scottish Gypsy relatives. With the exception of my Kickapoo grandmother, I had very little contact with my Cherokee, Kickapoo, or black relatives. Some parts of their traditions did get brought into my spiritual and magical practices, but the bulk of my spiritual and magic practices are in fact Faerie Faith and Scottish Hoodoo (not to be confused with African Hoodoo which is similar but different.)

The magic arts I practice are best described as "Eclectic" meaning a mix of many magical practices. This is because, my family tree has many branches, each coming from varying types of Christian and non-Christian practices. Over the centuries, members of my family picked aspects of their practice that were personally important to them, to pass down to their own children. This of course resulted in a melting pot blending on many traditions, which continued to meld together until they reached me.

Books I have written in the past, have gotten comments and reviews saying "But that's not how Wicca is done!" I feel I must therefore point out that I know absolutely nothing about Wicca. I do know that Wicca is a religion and the few Wiccans I have meet, tell me that practice of magic, is not part of their religion, but rather something that some members of their denomination choose to practice witchcraft in addition to Wicca and thus the confusion. I am not now nor have I ever had, any connection to Wicca. I know nothing about it's theologies or practices and as such, this book, should not in anyway be considered anything to do with Wicca in any way whatsoever. If you bought this book looking to learn about and practice Wicca, then you should probably return it, because that is not what this book is.

Likewise books I have written in the past, have gotten comments and reviews saying "But that's not how Witchcraft is done!" I feel I must therefore point out that I know absolutely nothing about Witchcraft, nor have I ever once written a book about witchcraft. I am not now nor have I ever had, any connection to Witchcraft. I know nothing about it's theologies or practices and as such, this book, should not in anyway be considered anything to do with Witchcraft in any way whatsoever. The title "Sea Witch of Old Orchard Beach" was given to me by the local Christian hate group that built a grease fryer bomb in October 2006 and blew up my house in their attempt to murder me and my family. Rather then be offended by their hate, I embraced the title of Sea Witch as it is how locals know me. I am however, not a witch, but rather a Voodoo Witch Doctor - one who removes curses cast by witches. If you bought this book looking to learn about and practice Witchcraft, then you should probably return it, because that is not what this book is.

I am a 5th generation Mormon (Latter Day Saint) and as such am a Christian. I am also a Vodou Priestess of the rank of Medsen Fey and am Marija Loa to the Loa Damballah-Weddo. I tend the local shrine and altar of Damballah and his wife Erzullie Fredda. Voodoo is a ChristoPagan religion. Witches and Wiccans whom I have meet, often tell me that unlike me, they are "Good Witches" who practice only "white Magic". when I ask for an explanation to their meaning, they tell me that I am an "Evil Witch" practicing "Dark Arts" and that "True Witches" and "Wiccans" never accosiate with my "kind". Oh well, to each his own then.

I say this, to inform you, before you go any farther into this book that, the Wiccan and Witch view of my families practice of magic, is that it is dark, black, bad, or otherwise evil. I do not see it this way, because in our practice there is no such thing as good or evil magic. Magic simply exists, and what you do with it, wither you use it for good or evil, is up to you. In spite of local Wiccans proclaiming that my families magic is "evil", you will find no magic in this book which is intended to cause harm to anything or anyone.

If you feel that Voodoo, Hoodoo, ChristoPagan, and Scottish Gypsy Magic arts are "evil" you should probably return this book, because, that's the type of spiritual and magic traditions you are going to find mentioned  in it's page.

In some cases I can say, this ritual comes from Vodou or that ritual comes from Mormonism, but in many instance, I do not know the original source of the ritual. Most of my ancestors were either Scottish or Kickapoo and many traditions were passed down through those lines. I can tell you which rituals my Scottish grandmother taught me, however, I could not tell you if my Scottish grandmother's rituals were actually Scottish in origin, or if she picked them up from other sources. Same goes for the Kickapoo side.

As such I make no claims to the origins of any ritual found in this book. I simply do not know the original source of the rituals, I only know that they were passed down in my family through various lines and reached me in the state which they are listed here.

I call what I do "Scottish Gypsy Magic" and "Rootwork" because I am myself a Scottish Gypsy who practices magic and rootwork. I do not use the term "Scottish Gypsy magic" to mean that what I do is a representation of ALL Gypsies or ALL Gypsy Magic, but rather to say that it is Scottish Gypsy Magic as practiced in my own clan.

The Scottish Gypsy race is made up of many smaller clans, in much the same way Native Americans are made up of many smaller tribes. Just as a Kickapoo Indian has vastly different cultural traditions from a Hopi Indian, so too does each Gypsy clan have vastly different traditions from one another. What this means in context of this book is that the magic rituals my own clan practices may be wicked different from the magic rituals practiced by another Gypsy clan.

What some Gypsy clans may consider to be esential to magic rituals, my clan may consider optional, and vise-versa. This book therefor can not be said to represent all magic practiced by all Gypsies and can be said to only represent magic as practiced by the Scottish Gypsy clan I grew up in.

Because there are many different types of magic, practiced in a wide variety of rituals, which vary from one culture to the next and many variations exist even within a single culture, and may be different from one family to the next, Scottish Gypsies believe that there is no "One True Path" that is right for everyone. Each person needs to find the practice which is right for them at their current time of life, and may change paths multiple times throughout their life. Your practice in the magic arts will change as your personal and spiritual needs changes.

This book is not a beginner's guide to magic and assumes you are already practicing magic on some levels. It is not however, an advanced guide to magic either, and someone completely new to magic, should be able to jump right in with minimal difficulty.

This is not a magical source book or directory. You will find no glosseries or dictionaies or lists of essential magic user tools or any of that sort of thing. Most people have never had any direct contact with a Gypsy or a Traveller or a Romany, and therefore the information they receive through the media has a significant impact on their opinions and understanding, and unfortunatly, most of that information glaringly wrong, wrong, wrong. And that is the point of this book, from one Scottish Gypsy to the world, to give you an inside look at what our lives actually are live.

I am a First Peoples Native (Kickapoo) & Canadian (Nova Scotia) Scottish Gypsy and do not speak or write in either "Standard American English" nor "Standard UK English". My books are written in a blend of Canadian English and Maine Style Welsh/Scottish English, and as such contain many "Non-Standard English" spellings, terms, phraseologies, and grammar usages which may be unfamiliar to many American or UK readers. Most characters in my fiction stories are themselves First Peoples, Welsh, Scottish, Canadian, and/or Traveller Gypsies and often speak in culturally accurate dialogue that is native to the author.

We are what some people refer to as Scoto-Indians. Scoto-Indians is not a term we ourselves use, and it seems to be used more by college professors, historians, and other researchers, more then every day people, as far as I know. Scoto-Indians are as the name implies Scottish Gypsies who interbred with Native American Indian tribes.

When the Scottish Gypsies came to the New World in the 1500s, they settled not with the white pre-American colonists, but rather with the native tribes. As indigenous peoples, their social structures and cultures had many similarities. wheras neither the Natives nor the Scottish Gypsies had anything in common with the white men.

Like the Native tribes, the Scottish Gypsies viewed land as essentially a resource, not as a thing to be bought and sold for greed and profit. They lived in clans similar to the Natives' tribes or clans. History was primarily an oral tradition and storyteller or bards were of great importance to both Native Americans and Scottish Gypsies. Both lived by farming and celebrated harvest festivals.

Both Scots and Indians had been driven from their native homelands, and forced into a nomad lifestyle they they did not want or choose. Because of their dark skin and dark hair, both Scottish Gypsies and Indians were seen as "red skinned savages", had their children stolen from them by white men, and were beaten, murdered, and forced into slavery.

Both Highland Natives and American Native on our oral history. The storyteller of the clans and tribes is the pivotal member of society who is revered, respected, and protected above all members. The storyteller carries the history of the people. Kill the storyteller and you kill the culture. this is true of Scottish Gypsies and American Indians and was why their societies melded together so easily. They looked the same, they dressed the same, they lived the same, had the same traditions. Many Scottish Gypsies believe that the American Indians are our brethren from centuries past, separated by an ocean.

Even the warriors and fighting traditions are the same. And spirit quests, walking to dreamtime, shamanic traditions. Stories of Little People. The Scots with their Leprechauns and Faeries, the Indians with their Memegwasi and Wedigo. The Scottish shapeshipers FarDarrig, Salamander, Kelpie and Phooka vs the Native America Thunderbird, Crow, Fox, and Coyote. Both cultures deeply revere nature and all it many spirits. Both cultures have traditions of talking animals and tree spirits.

White man can not even remember the names of their grandparents. They do not know their family histories past a few decades. White men see twenty years as a long time passed. Yet both the Natives of the Highlands and Natives of America, can recite centuries of their history, and for them/us a few decades time is nothing, we do not even consider 500 years to be a long time passed. Yet white men, consider a mere 50 years to be ancient history.

Both the Scottish Gypsies and the American Indians, look up the white men and shake our heads in sorrow for them, for them care nothing of their ancestors and where they came from. White men think only of money and greed and hoarding material wealth. They do not look to the future, they care nothing of the past, they think only of the now. 

The white men care not to preserve the land for their children's children, they care not to know the story of their fathers's fathers. They think only of themselves. They live separate and alone, connected to nothing, and when they die, they are forgotten with no one to tell their tale to future generations. It is a sad, empty, unconnected, lonely life you white men lead. I pity you. Your ancestors call out to you, but you do not listen, you just blunder on, thinking on nothing but money and selfishness and greed. What can I gain? Who can I hurt? What can I take from the colored men? Those are the only thoughts in your head. And thus you live and unhappy existence forever trying to fill your emptiness with more greed, more possessions, but you will never be full, you will never be happy, because you have no connection to the land or your ancestors, and without that, you will never find true happiness. 

Because of their emptiness white men act hatefully to anyone they see who is happy. They want that joy too and because they don't have it, they seek to destroy anyone who does, thus they attack the red men - both the Indian and the Scotsman - because both are happy. Both know to respect the land and live with, not against, the spirits of Nature. Both know and respect their anscetors. With their close connection to family and nature and not burdaned down with money, wealth, position, and fame, they live a life filled with true deep inner joy, that the white men will never know until they give up their endless obsession with ego and stop following after wealth, and instead, look back to their anscestors, look forward to the ir descendants, and embrace the land that nurishes them.

That is why, the Scottish Gypsies and the Native Americans were able to live together, why they both were at odds with the white men, but with each other lived side by side. DNA testing has already proven that many American Indians descended from the Native cultures of Russia, Siberia, and Mongolia. The exact same region the the oral history of the Scottish Gypsies says they come from. Is it any wonder then, that the Scottish Gypsies, when dumped on the shores of the New World in the late 1400s, left by white men to die, that they with their dark skin, similar outfits, and nearly identical traditions, were welcomed into Native American society with open arms?   

With my own family. There is much speculation over our exact origin, and in fact, we ourselves only have a documented paper trail to the 1530s and oral trail to the 1400s and before that is limited to "stories of the old ones" which sadly seem to have been much changed over the years. What we know for certain is that in the late 1400s/early 1500s white men kidnapped our people, herded us like cattle onto a ship and marooned us in the frigid, cold frozen forests of what is now Maine and Nova Scotia. We settled with the Native Americans on a plot of orchard farmlands, that is now called 146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, and our family lived in that spot for 500 years and still lives there to this day.

Now, there are multiple lines connected here. Four distinct clans of Scottish Gypsies and two distinct tribes of Native American Indians make up the unit of my four grandparents and eight great-grandparents. The Scottish Clans that make up our family tree include: The Goggings, McDuff, Ricker, Lewis, Lewis of McLoude, Drake, Atwater, and Murphey. (The Drake line is in question, as I will explain). There are several other Scottish clan bloodlines, through the Drake line, but, as I said, those are in question, due to their coming into the family via the Drake line.

There are three Indian tribes in our bloodline: Kickapoo, Cherokee, and MicMac. My grandmother was half-Kickapoo (father's race unknown) the daughter of a full-blooded Kickapoo.

Okay, let's start off with the line that's in question: The Drakes. The reason this line is in question, is because it was not uncommon for immigrants to change their names upon coming to America/Canada, and though, Captain John H. Drake denied changing his name, maintaining that Drake was his real last name, there is no documented evidence to prove he was born into the specific Drake family he claims. The people he claimed to be his parents, were white skinned Celtic Scottsmen and there are no records of them ever having a son named John. If he was in fact the son of the Drake he claimed was his father, then his mother had to have been someone other then the man's wife: probably a slave girl with very dark skin, for John H. Drake had dark skin, dark hair, and dark eyes, like a Romany Gypsy.

Captain Drake was the most "gypsiefied" Gypsy in our family. He embodied all the typical stereotypes white men think of when they hear the word Gypsy: the magic, the witchcraft, the thievery, the scams, the bootlegging, and outright piracy. Captain John H. Drake was a white man's dream come true, if they ever wanted to find a Gypsy that acted and lived like the stereotypical Gypsy.

My great-great-grandfather Captain John H. Drake was a different sort of Scottish Gypsy, then what most people think of. He was what was known at the time as a "Ferrymen Gypsy". Today called "The Boatmen Gypsies" or "The BargeDwellers". Yes, he lived on a boat. My great-great-grandfather Captain John H. Drake lived not in a covered wagon/vardo travelling the country, but rather on a ship, with blue sails (he used blueberries to dye them) that sailed between Nova Scotia and Maine raiding other ships of food cargos, which he brought back to Nova Scotia to feed his family and fellow clansmen. 

Do You Read Banned Books?
Want To Read The First Ever Books Banned By The United States Government?

How We Gypsies
See The Americans
Memoirs of a Gypsy Queen
A Behind The Scenes Look Into The Everyday Life of
The Scottish Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach, Maine
by
EelKat Wendy C. Allen

Was One of The 27 Books Banned By The United States Government On January 4, 2016

It was forced to be unpublished
and removed from books stores
by a court order issued by
The Town Hall of The Town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine,
A United States of America Government Orginization

The First Amendment to the United States Constitution prohibits the making of any law respecting an establishment of religion,

impeding the free exercise of religion,

abridging the freedom of speech,

infringing on the freedom of the press,

interfering with the right to peaceably assemble

or prohibiting the petitioning for a governmental redress of grievances.

It was adopted on December 15, 1791, as one of the ten amendments that constitute the Bill of Rights.

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“If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor. If an elephant has its foot on the tail of a mouse, and you say that you are neutral, the mouse will not appreciate your neutrality.” 
― Desmond Tutu

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Bullies should never force you to  suffer in silence. If someone has hurt you, let others know.

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“I wonder if you realize: When you browbeat people who disagree with you into silence - because they don't want to be called hater, bigot, Hitler, whatever - their silence will create for you the illusion that you're winning. But it's just an illusion - an illusion you find so intoxicating that you're completely unprepared when the moment of truth comes . . . and you lose.” 

― Dan Calabrese

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“I would rather be a little nobody, then to be a evil somebody.” 

― Abraham Lincoln

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“If you're horrible to me, I'm going to write a song about it, and you won't like it. That's how I operate.” 

― Taylor Swift

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How We Gypsies 
See The Americans
Memoirs of a Gypsy Queen
A Behind The Scenes Look Into
The Everyday Life of 
The Scottish Gypsies of
Old Orchard Beach, Maine
by 
EelKat Wendy C. Allen

Banned from publication on Amazon, by a First Amendment violating, court order on January 4, 2016, by the Old Orchard Beach Town Hall, a branch of the United States government, How We Gypsies See The Americans, is now available to read online for free.

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Banned by the United States Government, January 4, 2016 for being "Too Gay For The Family Friendly Town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine."

State of Maine, Biddeford District Court:

Docket #BDDC-PA-2015-00574

Keeping in mind that the judge never read the book and I was never allowed to testify, as MOST of the court case was done via an "exparte order" without my knowledge to court case against me even existed until nearly a year after it started. The whole judgement being based off a murder I had no connection to, with residents of Old Orchard Beach, using as their "evidence" the phrase: "Remember Saco Shaw's all transsexuals are alike" and citing that transgender people are running around Maine killing people because there is a transvestite Necromancer in this book, their claim being that had the Quaraun series not been published the Saco Shaw's Murder would not have happened.

In the court documents, the Town of Old Orchard Beach claims that the Quaraun series is "autobiographical" because it is set in my hometown, and that because the main character, a 400 year old Elf named Quaraun, is a partly-castrated serial killing transvestite eunuch necromancer who suffers from schizophrenia, that I the straight, female author am QUOTE "a dangerous mentally unstable gay transsexual eunuch terrorist, who will kill us all" UNQUOTE.

Throughout the court papers they referenced quotes said by Quaraun (a fictional non-Human character in a fantasy novel) in this book claiming that they were quotes taken off my "About Me Page" of my website. (Thus why my About Me Page now includes my response to the court documents' allegations that I am gay, transsexual, or eunuch). Also interesting is the fact my primary accuser in these court documents (the man who drove a backhoe over my house in 2013) is also the same person who hacked my KBoards account & my website, placing his name all over both, while impersonating me online and pretending to be me throughout August to December 2015 (a time period when I was offline due to multiple surgeries & hospitalization after being beaten up by a man driving a 4-door white pick up truck). Also interestingly, is I never knew who owned the backhoe, and his name was unknown to me prior to receiving the sheriff's notice of my books being banned on January 4, 2016. Also interesting to note is in addition to owning the backhoe that drove over my house, he also owns a 4-door white pick-up truck.

Also interesting to note is that when I went to the Town Hall to ask the Town Manager & Town Counsel why they were filing these absolutely, ludicrously, ridiculous, transphobic, civil rights violating court papers to begin with, none of them were aware of the existence of the court case, and the man with the 4-door white pick up truck is now suspected (by the FBI who is investigating this "highly suspicious court case") of having filed the court case in the Town Hall's name using official USA government letterhead stolen from the Town Hall's Code Enforcement office. From 2014 to mid 2016 the court papers read "Town of Old Orchard Beach vs Wendy Christine Allen" The FBI started investigating the Town Hall June 2016. From June 2016 to October 2016 the court documents read {name removed & name removed} (name of backhoe owner & 4-5-8's sister) vs Wendy Christine Allen. Several forged documents have since been uncovered in this court case, that is now known to have been done by a local resident who not only impersonated me online, but also impersonated the Old Orchard Beach Town Hall in court.

While the man named in the documents CLAIMED to work for the town hall, calling himself "the board of zoning appeals", this has since been proven to be yet another impersonation on his part, and the only two ACTUAL government employees to ever appear in court were Old Orchard Beach CEO Dan Feeney and Old Orchard Beach Police Officer Will Watson, both of whom said they were there "on behalf of Town Manager Larry Mead as his representative". Larry Mead when questioned, denied having any knowledge of the court case at all and was shocked to discover that he himself was named in the docket as the person who filed the paperwork. Seven other Town Hall Government officials were also named as having collectively filed the paperwork with him, including my cousin; all of whom when questioned, had no knowledge there was a court case going on in their names, with them named as Plaintiffs. In court police officer Will Watson broke down on the testimony stand, claiming to be blackmailed into being there, stating that his "beloved mother-in-law" was in frail health and "they are threatening to kill her if I don't comply". If he is in fact being blackmailed and if so by who, as yet remains unknown.

And in spite of the hysterical rumours this man has been screaming all over town, there is no more evidence that the transsexual serial killer Connor MacCalister ever read my books or even knew of their existence, then there is that I am a 400 year old gay Elf wizard.

Also interesting to note is the first court papers were filed October 2014, 3 weeks after the mass market release of The Night of The Screaming Unicorn, and 1 week after the public unveiling on my latest art car The Transgender Awareness Tour Bus, and nearly a year BEFORE the Saco Shaw's murder which happened August 2015. Connor MacCalister's name was not added to the court papers until September 12, 2015, a full year AFTER the first court papers were filed.

The vandalism of my tour bus (it being filled with feces 3 feet deep) happened April 10, 2015, and the beheading of my cats happened May 2015, both happening BEFORE the August 2015 murder, in spite of the residents of Old Orchard Beach, claiming they did those things BECAUSE of the Saco Shaw's murder.

In the end 27 of my books were 

banned and unpublished 

BY A 1st Amendment violating COURT ORDER 

that was issued by

THE OLD ORCHARD BEACH TOWN HALL,

a United States Government Organization, 

making the Quaraun Series the FIRST and ONLY books in American history to ever be

BOOKS BANNED

BY THE

UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT

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Do you know who filled my motorhome with feces April 2015?

Do you know who cut my cats' heads off?

Do you know who it is Police Officer Will Watson claims is blackmailing him?

Do you know who stole the $3million in tax money from the Old Orchard Beach Town Hall bank accounts during all of this?

Do you know who built the bomb that blew up my house October 18, 2006?

Do you know who drove a backhoe over my next house on August 8, 2013?

Do you know who the driver of the 4-door white pick up tuck is, the one who beat me up, on November 14, 2013 at Southern Maine Community College, paralyzing me for 5 months, leaving me crippled for the rest of my life?

Do you know who is holding my 10 cats hostage, cutting off their heads, and returning them back one head at a time?

Do you know the identity of the hacker who hacked my Kboards & Twitter accounts, from a public access computer at the McAuthor Public Library in Biddeford, Maine, throughout 2015, also hacking my website and impersinating me while posting the name of the man in this court case all over the internet to make it look like I did it, even though I was offline and in the hospital dying at the time it happened?

Do you know who in the town hall is providing official government letterhead from the Code Enforcement Office, for this and other (yes, several others) fraudulent court cases filed by the Old Orchard Beach Town Hall against the LGBTQ citizens of our town?

If you know the answers to these questions or have any additional information about this case please contact the FBI agent in charge of the investigation:

Agent Andy Drewer

of the Portland FBI

@ 207-774-9322 

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Seeing How "The Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach" Court Order Requires Me To Put This Notice In The Front Of The Novels,
I Assume It Also Requires I Put It In Front of Novel Excerpts Posted Online As Well, so, Here It Is... 
Enjoy The Stupidity That Is The
Town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine,
Where I Am Deemed,
In Their Words:
"Too Gay For The Family Friendly Town of Old Orchard Beach"
Because I'm The Author of The Quaraun Series.

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INTRODUCTION TO THE SERIES

The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane

(Added March 29, 2016)

by

EelKat Wendy Christine Allen

~o0o~

UPDATE: The Old Orchard Beach Town Hall has handed me a court order requiring I place a warning in my books, warning you that they have their heads stuck up their asses, I mean, warning you that this book was written by a non-white transgender author and contains non-white, LGBTQ characters, which the straight, white citizens of Old Orchard Beach find offensive because they never before took their heads out of their asses long enough to notice that there exist in this world non-white people and gay transgender men. The HORROR I have forced them to discover, when they took their heads out of their asses long enough to discover a non-white, transgender author has lived in their town since 1975!

As of January 4, 2016 ALL gay, transgender, and non-white authors, living in the white power, gay-hating town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine are now required to add a warning to the front of their books, warning readers that this book is a vile, evil, perversion of their senses because it contains non-white, minority, transgender, and or gay characters who by their very existence according to the white power, gay hating residents of the 99.9% white town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine do not deserve to live and should not be included as characters in books.

Because I am a vile, evil, non-white, transgender author who lives in Old Orchard Beach, Maine, I am now required by court order to place warning in my books, to warn readers that this book was written by a vile, evil, non-white, transgender author and there for may contain references to my vile, evil, non-white, transgender lifestyle, including to, shock, and horror, ACTUALLY CONTAIN

....

Non-white characters

oh, my, my, my, how evil of me to consider writing a book with a person of colour in it. And even worse, is the fact that...wait for it...

I've gone so far as to allow gay transvestite characters to be in my books.

How shockingly evil of me to offend the citizens of Old Orchard Beach, by including gay and transgender characters in my book. I have forced them to have to discover the horror that there exists non-white people in our town, and worse, have made them suffer the horrors of learning that LGBTQ citizens have the right to live. How evil of me. To punish me for the publication of the book you are now reading, they filled my home with sewage 3 feet deep and cut the heads off of my cats, drove a backhoe over my house, then beat me up and left me paralyzed for 5 months, during which time they hacked my online accounts of Kboards, NaNoWriMo, Twitter and other places and impersonated me, posting lots of shitty crap to try to discredit me and destroy my reputation. If you are one of my long time readers and followers, you no dought saw what transpired on KBoards and NaNoWriMo (I did not see it and still do not know what happened, seeing how I was in the hospital dying, while the hacker was taking over my accounts online.)

18 months later I am out of the wheelchair, relearning to walk and still refusing to unpublish my evil books containing non-white gay men and so now they have gotten a court order demanding the warning you are now reading, be placed in this book, because the Old Orchard Beach Town Hall (the plaintiff named on the court order – YES – an actual United States Government Organization has issued this civil rights violating court order, in blatant disregard to federal laws) believes that non-whites and gays and transgender citizens are so evil that they QUOTE “ought to be shot in the head” UNQUOTE.

The book you are now holding contains non-white characters, of the same vile, evil non-white race as the non-white author who wrote this book and because I am not white and have chosen to include non-white characters in this book, I am now required by court order to warn my non-white readers that this book was written by evil, vile non-white me and contains evil, vile non-white characters that will offend your holier then though piece of shit white asses. There, I am now in compliance with the white power, gay hating town of Old Orchard Beach's, civil rights violating court order. White trash has now been warned that non-white trash exists in this book.

The book you are now holding contains LGBTQ characters, of the same vile, evil LGBTQ existence as the LGBTQ who wrote this book and because I am LGBTQ and have chosen to include LGBTQ characters in this book, I am now required by court order to warn my LGBTQ readers that this book was written by evil, vile LGBTQ me and contains evil, vile LGBTQ characters that will offend your holier then though piece of shit straight asses. There, I am now in compliance with the white power, gay hating town of Old Orchard Beach's, civil rights violating court order. Straight trash has now been warned that non-straight trash exists in this book.

If you have any questions regarding this court order which violates the civil rights of people of colour, minority races, and LGBTQ citizens, please head to the State of Maine, Biddeford District Court and ask for copies of

Docket #BDDC-PA-2015-00574 and CV-15-58/CV-15-59

the Alfred Superior Court Docket #CV-15-299

and the Portland Superior Law Court Docket #YOR-15-253

Additionally, you can find more information by going to the Old Orchard Beach Police Department and requesting copies of ALL police reports made in regards to 144, 146, and 146a Portland Avenue, from 2001 to 2016 (approximately 300 reports).

Note, that the court order includes 4 interesting facts:

1: It states that transgender people in Old Orchard Beach are not allowed to own cats; the Town Manager confiscated my cats on this basis (the judge granted this). 140 families in Old Orchard Beach had a grand total of more then 500 cats taken from them via this court order.  Many of those cats are being returned to their owners, one head nailed to their door at a time.

2: It states that transgender vehicles are not allowed in the town of Old Orchard Beach and specifically that The Transgender Awareness Tour Bus be removed from the "perimeters of the family friendly town of Old Orchard Beach" (the judge denied this)

3: It states that transgender authors, not be allowed to publish books featuring transgender characters, and contains a list of books, deemed "Too gay for Old Orchard Beach" that the Town Hall requested be removed from publication. The judge ordered the removal and unpublication of 27 of my books, and that the rest have this warning placed in them.

4: That LGBTQ, non-white, non-Christians, and Muslims, not be allowed to set foot in Old Orchard Beach (with one motel owner in particular claiming his right to confiscate the homes, property, and business of some 140 families in Old Orchard Beach, by right of his desire to put condominiums on each of their properties. Interestingly, this is the same man who drove a backhoe over my house in 2013.) Part of this was passed, with the judge ordering LGBTQ families not allowed to set foot in their own homes (not rentals or apartments - houses they owned outright and owed no taxes or mortgages on, with 140 families be forced out of their homes on January 4, 2016. He dropped the request to confiscate homes of LGBTQ citizens when FBI Agent Andy Drewer Arrived to investigate him and the 5 businesses he owns, for his connection to the bomb that blew up my house in 2006.) Three court houses later a different judge overruled the first judge's civil rights violating order, with LGBTQ citizens being allowed to go home October 18, 2016, after 10 months of living in their cars.

Want to know the names, phone numbers, business locations, and home addresses of all the cat murdering, transphobic, gay-hating, white powered people who are trying to ban all LGBTQ and non-white citizens from Old Orchard Beach? Then go to those 3 court houses and request to get copies of all 700 pages of The Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach Court Case of Old Orchard Beach vs Wendy Christine Allen. 

All names and contact information of all the white power, gay hating  town hall officials, police officers, public works workers, motels, businesses, motel owners, business owners, and the KKK's own lawyers, behind this introduction now required to being added to books containing gay or non-white characters can be found in those court orders and police reports, here after collectively known as “The Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach Court Case” or #TooGayForOOB for short.

In those court dockets you will find more then 700 pages of utterly fascinating civil rights violating, animal abusing, hate crime glorifying, anti-gay, white power, transphobic lunacy. I highly recommend you get copies of those court dockets and see for yourself, the REALITY of how utterly insane the gay hating, white power mentality of Old Orchard Beach, really is. 

Or if you want to meet me at Staples, and are willing to pay however much it costs to have 700 pages of copies made, you can get copies made of my copy of the court order.

Happy reading.

Welcome to Maine, where love wins, everywhere, except in the white power, gay-hating town of Old Orchard Beach. TIP: If you are looking for a great fun summer family vacation spot this summer: avoid the transphobic, animal abusing, gay hating, white power town of Old Orchard Beach. This town is only family friendly, IF your family qualifies as a “real family” which to them means: you are white, Christian, and have no connections to LGBTQ people whatsoever. Save your hard earned money and DO NOT come to Old Orchard Beach this summer. Don't bother wasting your hard earned money on the transphobic, animal abusing, gay hating, white power trash that thinks it's okay to discriminate against people based on race, gender, religion, or colour.

There. Now I am in compliance with the court order and you, my dear reader have been warned that this book was written by evil, vile, perverted non-white, non-straight little old me and contains non-white, gay, transvestite characters. Can I ask: Have you EVER seen a book ANYWHERE that the author's town required the author to place a warning in the book, for ANY reason? Can anyone say RIDICULOUS? Yes, the town of Old Orchard Beach is being utterly ridiculous. I think they forgot that Old Orchard Beach is a town in America and not it's own country.

So, if you are a transphobic, gay-hating, white power person who is offended by the existence of transvestites, gays, non-Christians, people of colour, and other things that tick off white power mentalities, then you probably want to avoid these books.

For everybody else who isn't a white power, transphobic, gay-hating jerk with their head stuck up their own white, Christian ass: I hope you enjoy reading these books as much as I have enjoyed writing them. And for those of you who don't enjoy this sort of book, well, enjoy those knee-jerks, I'm told you guys should be expecting quite a few of them.

~EK

End of introduction.

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This article was originally written on: March 20, 2017

This page last updated on: March 20, 2017

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