How We Gypsies See The Americans

How We Gypsies See The Americans
Re-release of USA Government Banned Book
Page 2

Do You Read Banned Books?
Want To Read The First Ever Books Banned By The United States Government?

How We Gypsies 
See The Americans
Memoirs of a Gypsy Queen
A Behind The Scenes Look Into The Everyday Life of 
The Scottish Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach, Maine
by 
EelKat Wendy C. Allen

Was One of The 27 Books
Banned By The United States Government
On January 4, 2016

It was forced to be unpublished
and removed from books stores
by a court order issued by
The Town Hall of The Town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine,
A United States of America Government Orginization

Banned from publication on Amazon, by the United States Government, How We Gypsies See The Americans, is now available to read online for free.

How We Gypsies See The Americans
Re-release of USA Government Banned Book
Page 2

o0o~

How We Gypsies 

See The Americans

Memoirs of a Gypsy Queen

A Behind The Scenes Look Into The Everyday Life of 

The Scottish Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach, Maine

THE CULTURE & TRADITIONS OF THE SCOTTISH GYPSIES

OF OLD ORCHARD BEACH, MAINE

An Introduction To Scottish Gypsy Lifestyle

by

EelKat Wendy Christine Allen

~o0o~

When someone hears the word "Gypsy" usually their first thought is of some skinny belly dancing super-model bimbo who only takes time out of shaking her half naked ass in front of men, long enough to gaze seductively into a crystal ball. She probably wears a bikini top that covers nothing, a red kerchief on her head, garish painted red lips, more makeup then a circus clown, long fake lashes, and a scarf decorated with gold coins, while while dozens of bangles jingle on her arms, and jeweled rings twinkle from her fingers, toes, ears, and nose.

Yeah. You know what? Every time I see some stupid ass white man's stereotyped depiction of my people, I just want to spit in their face. I mean, it gets annoying after a while. All that glamorized exoticness of the white man's fantasy about what we are, does nothing but create harm. It blinds society from the truth and builds the false belief that Gypsies are just dripping with good times and mountains of gold coins. We're Gypsies not white men’s cartoon version Leprechauns for crying out loud!

One thing which many people fail to realize is that the Gypsies, the Romany, and the Travellers are three completely separate individual groups. So many people say that the word Gypsy is interchangeable with the word Romany, and that's ridiculous, because we Gypsies are not even genetically related to Romany! We share no blood link to either the Romany or the Traveller!

The Gypsies came to Maine from Nova Scotia from Kent, England via Germany from Egypt (where we were given the name Gypsy, meaning "The people who live with the Egyptians) from Scotland from Scandinavia from Russia from Mongolia from Persia from Iran. The Gypsy bloodline originates in Iran.

The Romany originate from India.

The Travellers are the Celts of British Isles who originated from Rome.

The problem is that white people say "Well you all look alike" so they slap one title on all of us. As the Gypsies were the first of MANY nomadic groups the Europeans encountered, they simply decided to call ALL nomadic groups "gypsies" regardless of if they were or not.

I don't know where the belly-dance stereotype comes from. I assume it's a Romany traditions, as the Romany lived in Turkey and Hungary Belly-dancing is a Turkish and Hungarian tradition, so I am left to assume that the Romany adopted belly-dancing into their culture, while they lived in Turkey and Hungary. Now we Gypsies, never lived in Turkey or Hungary, so it's silly for white folks to think we ever had access to Turkish folk dancing.

I've known close to 2,000 actual, real live Gypsies in my lifetime and I've yet to meet one who knew how to belly dance, was immoral enough to show even her ankles or wrists, had ever owned a crystal ball, let alone knew how to read one, and if she ever was presented with a gold coin, first thing she'd do is trade it in for as many meals as it would buy her children, not sew it to her clothes. Not many wear jewelry, and few wear makeup. My family (clan) personally contains 368 currently living members (at last count) and not a one of them would resemble anything close to what most white men think of when they think of Gypsies.

The average person in my clan, lives on an income that is usually more then 200% below the national poverty level (the current national poverty level being an income $23,000 for a single person). The average family unit with-in my clan has an income of $5,000 to $17,000 a year and 8 to 12 children per wife. The most wives per husband is 5, while the most husband per wife is 8. The wife who has given birth to the most children has 15 that lived. Yes, polygamy is practiced by several members of our clan. It is unknown which husband has fathered the most children, no one has ever tried to figure that out, we've only ever counted children per wife. My mother was number 8 of 12 children to survive infancy, only 11 of which made it to adulthood, and there were 3 stillborns in addition to the 12, meaning there were 2 woman to give birth 15 times, though only one of the two had 15 children survive to adulthood. She was Eva Viola Atwater, my Kickapoo grandmother. She was the first of the 2 wives her Nova Scotia born Canadian Scottish Gypsy husband had. With that many children per wife, in a family unit which over all contains more then 350 members, it is difficult to have enough money to buy enough food for everyone to have more then one sparse meal per day.

In other words, no one wears makeup or jewelry because no one can afford to buy makeup or jewelry and no one is stupid enough to buy makeup or jewelry when there are hungry mouths waiting to be fed. So put any false ideas that we are running around dripping in gold coins sewn to our skirts, or that our arms, fingers, ears, and noses drip heavy with gold, silver, and gems. That is nothing but Hollywood foolishness.

Prior to the boost in my writing career in 2007, I had never had an income above $2,000 a year. No, that is not a typo. Let me spell it out for you so you can wrap your mind around it for a bit. Two thousand dollars, total year end income before taxes. Yeah. My income was less per year then the average income per month is for a family living at the national poverty level. Something to think about next time you sit around daydreaming about my people dancing around with gold coins sewn to their dresses.

Oh, but what about Gypsy Magic? All those ctystal balls and tarot cards. Uhm. Yeah. I don't know what kind of magic that is, but it's not Scottish Gypsy magic I can tell you that. Curious about what this tarot thing was, seeing how I had never heard of it, until several people asked me to do tarot readings for them, seeing how I was a Gypsy and all, I looked it up and then started asking members of my clan what they thought of it. Most had never heard of tarot at all. The few who had heard of tarot, held the opinion that it was "an evil invention of Satan", while others had the response of "cards are evil, I don't gamble my hard earned money away". Yep. I asked 368 Gypsies and not a one of them knew what tarot actualy was or meant.

Oh but it goes farther then that. Since no one knew what tarot was, I asked about card readings instead. The answers I got were: "Oh I always read every Christmas card I get in the mail" or "my son knows how to read so he reads birthday cards for me so I know what they say before I send them". Yep. That's the extent of how much ACTUAL Gypsies knew about card reading.

Lets take a look at the infamous crystal ball. I went out and bought one and then I took it around to every Scottish Gypsy and asked them what they thought it was. A few identified it as a "seer stone" but most had the response of "Wow! That's a wicked big marble you got there. Where'd you ever find a marble that big?"

So, here we have a wicked large clan of actual, real live, 100% authentic Gypsies who don't bellydance, have no gold coins, dress fully covered from their necks to their ankles and wrists, don't know what tarot cards are, think card reading refers to reading Christmas or birthday cards, and identified a crystal ball as a very large marble. Kind of tosses the stereotype out the window.

If you identify Gypsies as a band of happy go lucky, pale skinned redheads, playing bagpipes, drinking Irish whiskey, singing songs, and dancing in kilts around bonfires...that too is not who we are. Bagpipes, kilts, and whiskey are traditions of the white-skinned Celtic invaders who drove the darker skinned, fur clad Indigenous Scottish Highland natives out of Scotland, forcing them to become Travellers without a home. They saught sanctuary in Egypt, and thus became known as The Gypsies (which meant: the ones who live with the Egyptians). My people were driven out of Scotland by the pale skinned redhead Celtic invaders long before the invention of bagpipes, Irish whiskey, or kilts.

The darker skinned Scottish Gypsies are not of Celtic origin and have no DNA blood relation to the pale skinned Irish Travellers, on this they are very adiment. Has DNA testing ever been done to prove this claim? Not at far as I am aware. As far as I know this claim of having no DNA blood link to either Romas or Travellers is based totally on belief in the oral history passed down for generations.

Likewise the Scottish Gypsies say they are not of Middle Eastern or East European origin and claim to have no DNA blood relation to the much darker skinned Rom, Romani, Romany. However, it is suspected that Scottish Gypsies originated from Iran, migrated to Mongolia, and from there there is confusion, because the Scottish Gypsies themselves claim to have been Mongolian, and it is unknown if they originated from Mongolians and Sythinians (from Iran) intermarrying or from Scythians who assimilated into Mongolian culture or from Mongolians who picked up Sythian traditions. While they claim Mongolian heritage, it is historically more likely that they descended from Scythians who lived in Mongolia, especially considering that their traditions, dress, and physical apareance more closely matched Scythians then Mongolians.

An interesting part of the oral history is the amount of anger most Scottish Gypsies openly display, if you tell them they are related to the Roma, or if you suggest they originated in Iran and not Mongolia. (There is stronger evidence to support they came from Iran and lived in Mongolia, then there is of having been actual Mongolians.) The silly part of it is that no one actually remembers why they hate being associated with the Roma. We suspect that at some point prior to the 1400s there was a connection somehow between the Scottish Gypsies and the Roma. Perhaps they were two rival/feuding clans? No one knows, because whatever happened, happened too far back, has no recorded history, and was never included in the passed down oral traditions. And so it remains a mystery how our people reached Scotland and from where, but it was so long ago that white men, the Celts, referred to us as the Indigenous people of Scotland.

But also interesting is the extreme anger against the suggestion of being Middle Eastern in origin. There is so much anger directed at this thought, that it is clear, there was an event in the forgotten past, involving some connection to the Middle East, which the clan turned it's back on and shunned to such a degree that all memory of it was lost. This points once again to the Scythians as they were themselves chased out of Iran, thus why they migrated to Mongolia. Which could also explain the assertation of Mongolian ancestry, if some of the Scythians turned their backs on their Middle Eastern heritage and assimilated into Mongolian society and becoming Mongolian citizens to the point of calling themselves Mongols.

However we have no actual documents connecting the family to either Mongolia or the Scythians of Iran, and only limited mentions of a Mongolian ancestry, so the Mongolian, Scythian, and Iranian connection is all speculation at best. The problem is no one really knows who the Scythians were or where they actually came from, either. While most people say they are from Iran, other sources say they originated in Persia, moved to Iran and were chased back to Persia. What is known is that the Scythians, a group of people known for wearing red silks, heavily embroidered in gold, did in fact settle in ancient Scotland, assimilated into Pictish society, and did get to Scotland from Mongolia during a war with the Vikings. Those details match with the oral tradition that or people reached Scotland as slaves to the Vikings, after being kidnapped in Mongolia.

Interestingly, the magic arts of our clan are very Persian, so is our mode of dress, and our traditions of embroidery, weaving, rugs, and tapestries. I’ve found no similarities between our clan and Iran culture, but many similarities between our culture and Persian and Scythian culture. It is our best guess that our clan actually originated from Persian, a possible branch of the Magi Brotherhood, and that our Faerie Faith religion was likely originally Zoroastrianism, that got blended with Fate worship of the Vikings.

If we cross reference the history of the Scythians arrival in Scotland, with our magic religious practices of Faerie Faith, evidence then suggests that our clan originated from Medes of Ancient Persia. The Scythians reign ed in Medes in 624–597 BC. The Median Magi were a nomadic Median tribe of priests. Their racial origins are unknown. They are always described as “The Wise Men of the East” even in the Bible, when hundreds (NOT three) of them are described as arriving in King Herod’s court. The Magi provided priests and soothsayers for both the Medes and the Persians. The word magic and magician, come from the Magi, and was used to describe their religious practices. They were a "priestly caste" which passed their functions from father to son, which is interesting, as in Gypsy culture it is the women, not the men who practice magic today. The Magi played a significant role in the court of the Median king Astyages who had in his court Medians as "advisers, dream interpreters, and soothsayers". Classical historians "unanimously" regarded the Magi as priests of the Zoroastrian faith. Where the Magi came from, how hey reached Persia, is unknown, but most historians seem to think that Persia was their homeland, and they became nomadic to escape the many wars of the time.

So while the Roma originate in India and the Celtic Travellers originate in Rome, the Scottish Gypsies originated in Persia, descended from the Magi. Because they lived in Scotland for over a thousand years, they were called the “Indigenous” native peoples of the Highlands and are considered to have “originated” in Scotland, regardless of where their ancient ancestors came from.

And a very important note here that the Romany ARE NOT Gypsies. A Gypsy is a very distinct race of people who “originated” from Scotland and lived with the Egyptians after being run out of Scotland by the Celts. Gypsies ARE NOT Roms and Roms ARE NOT Gypsies, NEVER refer to Roms as Gypsies and NEVER refer to Gypsies as Roms. The two words are NOT interchangeable and are not merely two words to describe the same people. The Roms have vastly different cultures and traditions from the Gypsies. Other than the fact that the Roms and the Gypsies are both nomadic, there are no other similarities between these two very separate and distinct races.

An Interesting note with Gypsies from Scotland are that most people lump them all together calling them Scottish Travellers, but the Scottish Gypsies themselves divide themselves off into many, many groups. The Scottish Gypsies, The Scottish Travellers, The Scottish Traveller Gypsies, Welsh and Scottish Gypsies, Scottish-Welsh Gypsies, Highland Gypsies, Lowland Gypsies, Royal Highland Gypsies, Indigenous Natives of Scotland, and many more.

Within each group, members may make it even more confusing by using many of the terms, and if asked which is correct, shrug and say they don't know. Most of these groups are in fact either Celtic or Romany and are not in any way DNA related to the Gypsies.

The Gypsies have very distinct physical features: olive gold skin, dark eyes and hair, high cheekbones, round faces, and large noses and look vastly different from Celtic Scotsmen. Unlike the much darker skinned Indian Romany who are typically very slender, or the much paler skinned, fair haired Celtic Travellers who also often rather slim, the Gypsies are often plump or chubby, some are even quite fat. While a few clans of Gypsies are tall, most Gypsies are VERY short, many under 5' tall. Most Gypsy woman are 5'1" to 5'4" while most Gypsy men are 5'4" to 5'9". They closely resemble small, plump, pale Native Americans with big bushy beards.

There are three different nomadic races of Scotland: The Travellers, The Gypsies, and the Romany.

The Scottish Travellers are white skinned Celtics who originated from Rome, Italy. Their religion is heavily Catholic. They may see Faeries as “fun to tell stories of” but they do not believe in them as real, not worship them as deity. They were woodworkers, tinsmiths, and sheep herders. They have no tradition of magic arts. They are very, very, very white often, nearly albino, with very thin and frail looking blond or red hair, and blue or green eyes.

The Scottish Gypsies originated from Persian Magi, and follow a religious tradition of magic arts and Fae worship. We wear fur robes and heavily embroidered silks and are known for our cloth, needlework, rugs, tapestries, robes, and magic arts. We wear bright red clothes, tall red hats and were called by the Celtics “Little People” because most of us are under 5’6” tall. The Irish called us Leprechauns because our people made fancy silk embroidered shoes. We have golden reddish-olive skin, resembling pale Native Americans. And very thick wavy dark reddish-brown to black hair, and dark green to dark brown eyes that look black from a distance.

The Romany Gypsies of Scotland aka the Scottish/Welsh Romanichals originated from India. They are known for their music and dances, and clothes of many colors. Their religious tradition is a blend of Hindu and Catholicism. They have a rich tradition of belly dancing and spicy foods. They have very dark skin of a deep golden brown color, thick straight black hair, and brown black eyes.

My people, we are the Scottish Gypsies, descended from the Magi. We are in no way related to the Romany or the Travellers. We are the people the Celts referred to as “The Little People”. Our magic arts were feared by even the Romany and the Travellers, who like other races and cultures saw us Gypsies as “the children of Satan” due to our use of the magic arts.

Depending on which member of the clan you ask, in my own clan, various members call themselves: Indigenous Natives of Scotland, Highland Gypsies, Royal Highland Gypsies, Scottish-Welsh Gypsies, The Scottish Traveller Gypsies, or Scottish Gypsies. However they will NEVER call themselves Scottish Travellers or Lowland Gypsies and will become angry, often violent if you address them as either of these two. The belief being that Lowland Gypsies aka The Scottish Travellers are "inferior" as they are "Celtic" or descended from the "white invaders". While the land has varying opinions on what to call themselves they all agree on one thing: they descended from the pre-Celtic "natives" of the Highlands, who came to Scotland via enslavement by Vikings, who as the story goes, says that the Vikings invaded Mongolia to kidnap the Holy Women and keep them on board Viking vessels to ward off evil spirits. No one in the clan knows who started this oral tradition of when, only that it has been passed down in our family since before the clan was kidnapped by the English and marooned on what is now Old Orchard Beach, Maine in the 1530s. This origin story has been passed down since the 1530s and is believed by clansmen to be accurate, though there are no documents to either prove or disprove the story.

The clan members are also all in agreement that we are not related to either the Roma or the Travellers, as the Roma come from India and Eastern Europe, while the Travellers are from Ireland and lower Scotland. Tempers fly if anyone calls a clan member a Roma or Traveller, as either is seen as an insult. Likewise all clan members take great offense when someone refers a Roma or a Traveller as a Gypsy. Calling a Roma or a Traveller, a Gypsy in the presence of a Scottish Gypsy, could very well result in their hands round your neck throttling you for your stupidity of not being able to tell the difference between a Gypsy, a Roma and a Traveller - three very different and distinct races. Nothing infuriates a Scottish Gypsy more, then to hear a white man refer to a Roma or Traveller as a Gypsy, or to say that the word Gypsy is interchangeable with Roma or Traveller.

The short of it is, that Gypsies really do not like Roms or Travellers, any more then they like white folks, and prefer to have little to no contact with either group, and are ready to gather arms and wage war on any Roma or Traveller who dares think of calling themselves a Gypsy.

In the mind of a Scottish Gypsy, the Roma and the Travellers have spent centuries ruining our reputation with their habit of thievery and then laying the blame on us. They use our name of Gypsy to do their crimes and then use their name Roma or Traveller to do they good deeds, and in the end, white people end up associating the name Gypsy with crime. This has made the Gypsies hate the Roma and Travellers with a bitter vengeance, because the Roma and Travellers have been at it so long that they have created many false myths, urban legends, and stereotypes about Gypsies which have no connection to the REAL Gypsies at all and are only things which are done by Roma and Travellers, neither of whom are Gypsies.

So what of the Gypsy stereotype myth is true?

If you identified Gypsies as very large, often polygamous, families, with a dozen or more children per wife, where multiple generations of grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins live in one wicked large extended family unit known as a "clan", who are hunters/ gatherers/ farmers who live on off-grid homesteads with each husband in his own cabin/ trailer/ wagon/ motorhome and each wife and her children living in her own cabin/trailer/wagon/motorhome, have fields full of strangely decorated and painted cars and covered wagons, who are small and round and golden colored and believe themselves to be half-human/half-leprechaun, are highly superstitious and will do nothing without consulting the spirits (Little People/Faeries), wear eye-blinding loud colors of red and gold, have women warriors who guard the clan in full war paint, defend themselves by spouting off curses and hexes, flee from the sight of white men faster then mice, and who periodically start their engines or hitch up their horses and travel around the country only to return back to their farms and not move again for another decade, then, well, that would have been an accurate non-stereotyped depiction of our clan and how we live.

My goal in writing this book is to open the eyes of the ignorant, to the actuality of what the lives of Gypsies really is like. The idea for this book came about after a series of violent hate crimes, including a grease fryer bomb, which were aimed at our non-white Scottish Gypsy family, by a group of White Supremacists Neo-Nazis (or at least they called themselves Neo-Nazis - I’m not sure what exactly that even means, but that’s what they called themselves) which moved into our town for a brief period of time. The men who took part in these crimes (which occurred in the late 1990s and into the early to mid 2000's) have since done jail time, some went to prison, and all have left the state, but their action have haunted our family for more then a decade, with several members of my family now disabled and crippled due to injuries sustained from various violent attacks.

In 2014, the man who built the bomb in 2006, was released from prison, and he was only out of prison days, before he went back to his old habits. In the 4 months since his prison release, more then a dozen acts of violent harassment have occurred and it was this that lead me to ask: Why? Why us? This man was a stranger from out of state who no one here had ever heard of before. He dropped into our lives from out of no where and no one knows who he is or why of all the non-white families he could have picked, why did he pick ours?

Do You Read Banned Books?
Want To Read The First Ever Books Banned By The United States Government?

How We Gypsies
See The Americans
Memoirs of a Gypsy Queen
A Behind The Scenes Look Into The Everyday Life of
The Scottish Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach, Maine
by
EelKat Wendy C. Allen

Was One of The 27 Books Banned By The United States Government On January 4, 2016

It was forced to be unpublished
and removed from books stores
by a court order issued by
The Town Hall of The Town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine,
A United States of America Government Orginization

The First Amendment to the United States Constitution prohibits the making of any law respecting an establishment of religion,

impeding the free exercise of religion,

abridging the freedom of speech,

infringing on the freedom of the press,

interfering with the right to peaceably assemble

or prohibiting the petitioning for a governmental redress of grievances.

It was adopted on December 15, 1791, as one of the ten amendments that constitute the Bill of Rights.

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“If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor. If an elephant has its foot on the tail of a mouse, and you say that you are neutral, the mouse will not appreciate your neutrality.” 
― Desmond Tutu

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Bullies should never force you to  suffer in silence. If someone has hurt you, let others know.

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“I wonder if you realize: When you browbeat people who disagree with you into silence - because they don't want to be called hater, bigot, Hitler, whatever - their silence will create for you the illusion that you're winning. But it's just an illusion - an illusion you find so intoxicating that you're completely unprepared when the moment of truth comes . . . and you lose.” 

― Dan Calabrese

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“I would rather be a little nobody, then to be a evil somebody.” 

― Abraham Lincoln

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“If you're horrible to me, I'm going to write a song about it, and you won't like it. That's how I operate.” 

― Taylor Swift

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How We Gypsies 
See The Americans
Memoirs of a Gypsy Queen
A Behind The Scenes Look Into
The Everyday Life of 
The Scottish Gypsies of
Old Orchard Beach, Maine
by 
EelKat Wendy C. Allen

Banned from publication on Amazon, by a First Amendment violating, court order on January 4, 2016, by the Old Orchard Beach Town Hall, a branch of the United States government, How We Gypsies See The Americans, is now available to read online for free.

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Banned by the United States Government, January 4, 2016 for being "Too Gay For The Family Friendly Town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine."

State of Maine, Biddeford District Court:

Docket #BDDC-PA-2015-00574

Keeping in mind that the judge never read the book and I was never allowed to testify, as MOST of the court case was done via an "exparte order" without my knowledge to court case against me even existed until nearly a year after it started. The whole judgement being based off a murder I had no connection to, with residents of Old Orchard Beach, using as their "evidence" the phrase: "Remember Saco Shaw's all transsexuals are alike" and citing that transgender people are running around Maine killing people because there is a transvestite Necromancer in this book, their claim being that had the Quaraun series not been published the Saco Shaw's Murder would not have happened.

In the court documents, the Town of Old Orchard Beach claims that the Quaraun series is "autobiographical" because it is set in my hometown, and that because the main character, a 400 year old Elf named Quaraun, is a partly-castrated serial killing transvestite eunuch necromancer who suffers from schizophrenia, that I the straight, female author am QUOTE "a dangerous mentally unstable gay transsexual eunuch terrorist, who will kill us all" UNQUOTE.

Throughout the court papers they referenced quotes said by Quaraun (a fictional non-Human character in a fantasy novel) in this book claiming that they were quotes taken off my "About Me Page" of my website. (Thus why my About Me Page now includes my response to the court documents' allegations that I am gay, transsexual, or eunuch). Also interesting is the fact my primary accuser in these court documents (the man who drove a backhoe over my house in 2013) is also the same person who hacked my KBoards account & my website, placing his name all over both, while impersonating me online and pretending to be me throughout August to December 2015 (a time period when I was offline due to multiple surgeries & hospitalization after being beaten up by a man driving a 4-door white pick up truck). Also interestingly, is I never knew who owned the backhoe, and his name was unknown to me prior to receiving the sheriff's notice of my books being banned on January 4, 2016. Also interesting to note is in addition to owning the backhoe that drove over my house, he also owns a 4-door white pick-up truck.

Also interesting to note is that when I went to the Town Hall to ask the Town Manager & Town Counsel why they were filing these absolutely, ludicrously, ridiculous, transphobic, civil rights violating court papers to begin with, none of them were aware of the existence of the court case, and the man with the 4-door white pick up truck is now suspected (by the FBI who is investigating this "highly suspicious court case") of having filed the court case in the Town Hall's name using official USA government letterhead stolen from the Town Hall's Code Enforcement office. From 2014 to mid 2016 the court papers read "Town of Old Orchard Beach vs Wendy Christine Allen" The FBI started investigating the Town Hall June 2016. From June 2016 to October 2016 the court documents read {name removed & name removed} (name of backhoe owner & 4-5-8's sister) vs Wendy Christine Allen. Several forged documents have since been uncovered in this court case, that is now known to have been done by a local resident who not only impersonated me online, but also impersonated the Old Orchard Beach Town Hall in court.

While the man named in the documents CLAIMED to work for the town hall, calling himself "the board of zoning appeals", this has since been proven to be yet another impersonation on his part, and the only two ACTUAL government employees to ever appear in court were Old Orchard Beach CEO Dan Feeney and Old Orchard Beach Police Officer Will Watson, both of whom said they were there "on behalf of Town Manager Larry Mead as his representative". Larry Mead when questioned, denied having any knowledge of the court case at all and was shocked to discover that he himself was named in the docket as the person who filed the paperwork. Seven other Town Hall Government officials were also named as having collectively filed the paperwork with him, including my cousin; all of whom when questioned, had no knowledge there was a court case going on in their names, with them named as Plaintiffs. In court police officer Will Watson broke down on the testimony stand, claiming to be blackmailed into being there, stating that his "beloved mother-in-law" was in frail health and "they are threatening to kill her if I don't comply". If he is in fact being blackmailed and if so by who, as yet remains unknown.

And in spite of the hysterical rumours this man has been screaming all over town, there is no more evidence that the transsexual serial killer Connor MacCalister ever read my books or even knew of their existence, then there is that I am a 400 year old gay Elf wizard.

Also interesting to note is the first court papers were filed October 2014, 3 weeks after the mass market release of The Night of The Screaming Unicorn, and 1 week after the public unveiling on my latest art car The Transgender Awareness Tour Bus, and nearly a year BEFORE the Saco Shaw's murder which happened August 2015. Connor MacCalister's name was not added to the court papers until September 12, 2015, a full year AFTER the first court papers were filed.

The vandalism of my tour bus (it being filled with feces 3 feet deep) happened April 10, 2015, and the beheading of my cats happened May 2015, both happening BEFORE the August 2015 murder, in spite of the residents of Old Orchard Beach, claiming they did those things BECAUSE of the Saco Shaw's murder.

In the end 27 of my books were 

banned and unpublished 

BY A 1st Amendment violating COURT ORDER 

that was issued by

THE OLD ORCHARD BEACH TOWN HALL,

a United States Government Organization, 

making the Quaraun Series the FIRST and ONLY books in American history to ever be

BOOKS BANNED

BY THE

UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT

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Do you know who filled my motorhome with feces April 2015?

Do you know who cut my cats' heads off?

Do you know who it is Police Officer Will Watson claims is blackmailing him?

Do you know who stole the $3million in tax money from the Old Orchard Beach Town Hall bank accounts during all of this?

Do you know who built the bomb that blew up my house October 18, 2006?

Do you know who drove a backhoe over my next house on August 8, 2013?

Do you know who the driver of the 4-door white pick up tuck is, the one who beat me up, on November 14, 2013 at Southern Maine Community College, paralyzing me for 5 months, leaving me crippled for the rest of my life?

Do you know who is holding my 10 cats hostage, cutting off their heads, and returning them back one head at a time?

Do you know the identity of the hacker who hacked my Kboards & Twitter accounts, from a public access computer at the McAuthor Public Library in Biddeford, Maine, throughout 2015, also hacking my website and impersinating me while posting the name of the man in this court case all over the internet to make it look like I did it, even though I was offline and in the hospital dying at the time it happened?

Do you know who in the town hall is providing official government letterhead from the Code Enforcement Office, for this and other (yes, several others) fraudulent court cases filed by the Old Orchard Beach Town Hall against the LGBTQ citizens of our town?

If you know the answers to these questions or have any additional information about this case please contact the FBI agent in charge of the investigation:

Agent Andy Drewer

of the Portland FBI

@ 207-774-9322 

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Seeing How "The Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach" Court Order Requires Me To Put This Notice In The Front Of The Novels,
I Assume It Also Requires I Put It In Front of Novel Excerpts Posted Online As Well, so, Here It Is... 
Enjoy The Stupidity That Is The
Town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine,
Where I Am Deemed,
In Their Words:
"Too Gay For The Family Friendly Town of Old Orchard Beach"
Because I'm The Author of The Quaraun Series.

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INTRODUCTION TO THE SERIES

The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane

(Added March 29, 2016)

by

EelKat Wendy Christine Allen

~o0o~

UPDATE: The Old Orchard Beach Town Hall has handed me a court order requiring I place a warning in my books, warning you that they have their heads stuck up their asses, I mean, warning you that this book was written by a non-white transgender author and contains non-white, LGBTQ characters, which the straight, white citizens of Old Orchard Beach find offensive because they never before took their heads out of their asses long enough to notice that there exist in this world non-white people and gay transgender men. The HORROR I have forced them to discover, when they took their heads out of their asses long enough to discover a non-white, transgender author has lived in their town since 1975!

As of January 4, 2016 ALL gay, transgender, and non-white authors, living in the white power, gay-hating town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine are now required to add a warning to the front of their books, warning readers that this book is a vile, evil, perversion of their senses because it contains non-white, minority, transgender, and or gay characters who by their very existence according to the white power, gay hating residents of the 99.9% white town of Old Orchard Beach, Maine do not deserve to live and should not be included as characters in books.

Because I am a vile, evil, non-white, transgender author who lives in Old Orchard Beach, Maine, I am now required by court order to place warning in my books, to warn readers that this book was written by a vile, evil, non-white, transgender author and there for may contain references to my vile, evil, non-white, transgender lifestyle, including to, shock, and horror, ACTUALLY CONTAIN

....

Non-white characters

oh, my, my, my, how evil of me to consider writing a book with a person of colour in it. And even worse, is the fact that...wait for it...

I've gone so far as to allow gay transvestite characters to be in my books.

How shockingly evil of me to offend the citizens of Old Orchard Beach, by including gay and transgender characters in my book. I have forced them to have to discover the horror that there exists non-white people in our town, and worse, have made them suffer the horrors of learning that LGBTQ citizens have the right to live. How evil of me. To punish me for the publication of the book you are now reading, they filled my home with sewage 3 feet deep and cut the heads off of my cats, drove a backhoe over my house, then beat me up and left me paralyzed for 5 months, during which time they hacked my online accounts of Kboards, NaNoWriMo, Twitter and other places and impersonated me, posting lots of shitty crap to try to discredit me and destroy my reputation. If you are one of my long time readers and followers, you no dought saw what transpired on KBoards and NaNoWriMo (I did not see it and still do not know what happened, seeing how I was in the hospital dying, while the hacker was taking over my accounts online.)

18 months later I am out of the wheelchair, relearning to walk and still refusing to unpublish my evil books containing non-white gay men and so now they have gotten a court order demanding the warning you are now reading, be placed in this book, because the Old Orchard Beach Town Hall (the plaintiff named on the court order – YES – an actual United States Government Organization has issued this civil rights violating court order, in blatant disregard to federal laws) believes that non-whites and gays and transgender citizens are so evil that they QUOTE “ought to be shot in the head” UNQUOTE.

The book you are now holding contains non-white characters, of the same vile, evil non-white race as the non-white author who wrote this book and because I am not white and have chosen to include non-white characters in this book, I am now required by court order to warn my non-white readers that this book was written by evil, vile non-white me and contains evil, vile non-white characters that will offend your holier then though piece of shit white asses. There, I am now in compliance with the white power, gay hating town of Old Orchard Beach's, civil rights violating court order. White trash has now been warned that non-white trash exists in this book.

The book you are now holding contains LGBTQ characters, of the same vile, evil LGBTQ existence as the LGBTQ who wrote this book and because I am LGBTQ and have chosen to include LGBTQ characters in this book, I am now required by court order to warn my LGBTQ readers that this book was written by evil, vile LGBTQ me and contains evil, vile LGBTQ characters that will offend your holier then though piece of shit straight asses. There, I am now in compliance with the white power, gay hating town of Old Orchard Beach's, civil rights violating court order. Straight trash has now been warned that non-straight trash exists in this book.

If you have any questions regarding this court order which violates the civil rights of people of colour, minority races, and LGBTQ citizens, please head to the State of Maine, Biddeford District Court and ask for copies of

Docket #BDDC-PA-2015-00574 and CV-15-58/CV-15-59

the Alfred Superior Court Docket #CV-15-299

and the Portland Superior Law Court Docket #YOR-15-253

Additionally, you can find more information by going to the Old Orchard Beach Police Department and requesting copies of ALL police reports made in regards to 144, 146, and 146a Portland Avenue, from 2001 to 2016 (approximately 300 reports).

Note, that the court order includes 4 interesting facts:

1: It states that transgender people in Old Orchard Beach are not allowed to own cats; the Town Manager confiscated my cats on this basis (the judge granted this). 140 families in Old Orchard Beach had a grand total of more then 500 cats taken from them via this court order.  Many of those cats are being returned to their owners, one head nailed to their door at a time.

2: It states that transgender vehicles are not allowed in the town of Old Orchard Beach and specifically that The Transgender Awareness Tour Bus be removed from the "perimeters of the family friendly town of Old Orchard Beach" (the judge denied this)

3: It states that transgender authors, not be allowed to publish books featuring transgender characters, and contains a list of books, deemed "Too gay for Old Orchard Beach" that the Town Hall requested be removed from publication. The judge ordered the removal and unpublication of 27 of my books, and that the rest have this warning placed in them.

4: That LGBTQ, non-white, non-Christians, and Muslims, not be allowed to set foot in Old Orchard Beach (with one motel owner in particular claiming his right to confiscate the homes, property, and business of some 140 families in Old Orchard Beach, by right of his desire to put condominiums on each of their properties. Interestingly, this is the same man who drove a backhoe over my house in 2013.) Part of this was passed, with the judge ordering LGBTQ families not allowed to set foot in their own homes (not rentals or apartments - houses they owned outright and owed no taxes or mortgages on, with 140 families be forced out of their homes on January 4, 2016. He dropped the request to confiscate homes of LGBTQ citizens when FBI Agent Andy Drewer Arrived to investigate him and the 5 businesses he owns, for his connection to the bomb that blew up my house in 2006.) Three court houses later a different judge overruled the first judge's civil rights violating order, with LGBTQ citizens being allowed to go home October 18, 2016, after 10 months of living in their cars.

Want to know the names, phone numbers, business locations, and home addresses of all the cat murdering, transphobic, gay-hating, white powered people who are trying to ban all LGBTQ and non-white citizens from Old Orchard Beach? Then go to those 3 court houses and request to get copies of all 700 pages of The Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach Court Case of Old Orchard Beach vs Wendy Christine Allen. 

All names and contact information of all the white power, gay hating  town hall officials, police officers, public works workers, motels, businesses, motel owners, business owners, and the KKK's own lawyers, behind this introduction now required to being added to books containing gay or non-white characters can be found in those court orders and police reports, here after collectively known as “The Too Gay For Old Orchard Beach Court Case” or #TooGayForOOB for short.

In those court dockets you will find more then 700 pages of utterly fascinating civil rights violating, animal abusing, hate crime glorifying, anti-gay, white power, transphobic lunacy. I highly recommend you get copies of those court dockets and see for yourself, the REALITY of how utterly insane the gay hating, white power mentality of Old Orchard Beach, really is. 

Or if you want to meet me at Staples, and are willing to pay however much it costs to have 700 pages of copies made, you can get copies made of my copy of the court order.

Happy reading.

Welcome to Maine, where love wins, everywhere, except in the white power, gay-hating town of Old Orchard Beach. TIP: If you are looking for a great fun summer family vacation spot this summer: avoid the transphobic, animal abusing, gay hating, white power town of Old Orchard Beach. This town is only family friendly, IF your family qualifies as a “real family” which to them means: you are white, Christian, and have no connections to LGBTQ people whatsoever. Save your hard earned money and DO NOT come to Old Orchard Beach this summer. Don't bother wasting your hard earned money on the transphobic, animal abusing, gay hating, white power trash that thinks it's okay to discriminate against people based on race, gender, religion, or colour.

There. Now I am in compliance with the court order and you, my dear reader have been warned that this book was written by evil, vile, perverted non-white, non-straight little old me and contains non-white, gay, transvestite characters. Can I ask: Have you EVER seen a book ANYWHERE that the author's town required the author to place a warning in the book, for ANY reason? Can anyone say RIDICULOUS? Yes, the town of Old Orchard Beach is being utterly ridiculous. I think they forgot that Old Orchard Beach is a town in America and not it's own country.

So, if you are a transphobic, gay-hating, white power person who is offended by the existence of transvestites, gays, non-Christians, people of colour, and other things that tick off white power mentalities, then you probably want to avoid these books.

For everybody else who isn't a white power, transphobic, gay-hating jerk with their head stuck up their own white, Christian ass: I hope you enjoy reading these books as much as I have enjoyed writing them. And for those of you who don't enjoy this sort of book, well, enjoy those knee-jerks, I'm told you guys should be expecting quite a few of them.

~EK

End of introduction.

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This article was originally written on: March 20, 2017

This page last updated on: March 20, 2017

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