EelKat Wendy C Allen - Author Interview: Spell Casting Side Effects: Magic In Quaraun's Universe | Fantasy Author Interview



Quaraun The Insane 
The Summoner of Darkness
Santa's Floating Dead Body
(No clue what chapter it is, it's anyone's guess)














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The Summoner of Darkness:
Santa's Floating Dead Body

"Pine cones!" Unicorn suddenly screamed.

"What?" 

"Look at the cute little pine cones!"

"I'm looking at them," Quaraun said. "I'm just not sure why you are."

"I love pine cones."

"Why?" 

"Pine cones are like tree poop."

"Tree poop?"

"Aye."

"You think of the weirdest things."

"Aye. I knows it."

Quaraun stared at the tiny green and brown cones scattered on the ground.

"They look like miniature dead goblins," Quaraun said.

"We've lost Xanadoot," Quaraun said looking around. "ZooLock! Where's your slave gone off to?"

"I know not, my Lord."

"Will you stop calling me 'Lord'?"

"Yes, your Ladyship."

"ZOOLOCK!"

Quaraun glared at the squid beast.

"Where is Xanadoot?"

"He ran off when the highway men attacked. Your dragon brought me back, but neglected to bring back poor Xanadoot. He's probably half way back to Persia by now."

"I don't believe you."

"I speak the truth."

"Which is out of character for you, seeing how nothing you say is true."

"As you wish, my Lord."

"I told you to stop saying that."

Quaraun turned to Unicorn.

"Why didn't you tell me Xanadoot was missing?"

Unicorn shrugged.

"I did nae notice."

"How could you not notice?"

"Ya was flying through the clouds most of da day. Me brain no can keep track of many t'ings at once. Ya was vomiting ya guts half the day. I did spend me time taking care of ya. I was no paying mind to the Thullid's goblin."

Quaraun sighed.

"Let's go."

"Where we go to."

"Into the woods. Just follow this path and see where it takes us. It seems to be what I do."

The three continued on in silence for a short while, moving quickly through the dense forest to put as much distance as possible between themselves and the Human cravan they'd left back on the road.

"Why does ya walk so much?" Unicorn asked Quaraun, breaking the silence.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean ya walks all over the world and ya does no seem to have a reason for doing so."

"I like walking."

"Most Elves settle down and lives in a house. Hs a family. Never travels. Ya never settles down. Not even for a few days. Not even now when ya is hurt."

"I'm not hurt."

"Ya leg is bleeding."

Quaraun looked down at his wounded knee.

"I hadn't noticed."

"I t'inks we should find a place to settle down for a while."

"You mean stop travelling?"

"Aye."

"Why would I do that?"

"Why are ya travelling?"

"I'm a Lich Hunter."

"Who does nae hunt Liches."

"I found my Lich."

"Ya started travelling to look for me."

"Yes."

"And now ya found me. So why ya still travelling?"

"I don't know. Habit. I've done it so long. I can't seem to stop."

"Does ya want to?"

"I have to now. There's a price on my head."

"The Guild?"

"Yeah. Necromancy is outlawed. I had to become a Necromancer to resurrect you. And then I killed my family. And all the villagers. And the king."

"And the Katopas."

"And the Katopas."

"And the DiJinn," ZooLock added.

"And the DiJinn," Quaraun sighed. "I'm wanted for murder, mutiny, treason, genocide, necromancy, practicing magic without proper permits and authorizations from the Guild, and being the male sex partner of another male. I can't really stay in any one town very long before some one figures out they can gain a king's ransom for turning me over to the Guild,"

"So ya started out travelling, to looks for me dead soul," Unicorn stated. "And in doing so, raked up a criminal record, which now forces ya to continue travelling causing ya be on the run from the Guild, then, eh?"

"Yes."

Quaraun stopped walking. Unicorn who was walking too close behind the Elf, ran into him.

"I wish was would no stop like that," the Faerie complained. "Give me some type of warning ya gonna stop bolt short like that."

"I just thought of something," Quaraun said, not paying attention to Unicorn's complaint.

"What ya Jelly brain t'inking?"

"For the past three days we've had one thing after another chasing us off the main road."

Quaraun turned around to face the direction they had come from.

"It's like someone is tossing stuff in our path to stop us from going forward."

"Ya mean magic? Like another wizard?"

"Yeah. Either preventing us from going on that road or forcing us to go into these woods."

"Why would some one do that, eh?"

"I don't know. But first those highway men, then those hell hounds, and then that impossibly huge turtle... and those two cats and the pumpkins and that out of season field of poppies that had a really bad effect on me this morning. None of this feels right. Those highway men didn't try to rob us. In fact they didn't go after you or ZooLock at all. They just held you down while they attacked me. I thought they were going to rape me, that's what most Humans do, but they didn't do that either. They ambushed us, just to hurt me. That's all they did. It's like they knew we were coming and waited for us."

"Ya t'ink some one paid them to beat ya up?"

"Yeah. I do."

"Who would do that?"

"I don't know. But their is a price on my head and it gets higher all the time. What you said about me travelling, back there. I keep thinking about it. I would like to settle down and have a place to live and not travel any more, but I can't because there's always someone ready to hand me over to the Guild."

"Aye, but ya is very, wicked powerful wizard. People says ya is most powerful wizard in whole of world. More powerful then evil Lich King Gwallmaiic, Elf Eater of Pepper Valley, leader of Lich Lords."

"You ARE King Gwallmaiic, exiled King of the Realm of Fae."

"I knows. And that why I know rumours is true. Ya has far surpassed me in magic ability, provided ya stay off the poppies and wine long enough to keep ya head on straight."

"Those hell hounds," Quaraun went on, ignoring Unicorn's remark about his drinking and drug addiction. "They were from another dimension. They just appeared out of no where. Zapped into existence. Magic literally tossed them at my feet. And that half Elf..."

"The GhoulSpawn?"

"Yeah. He just showed up out of no where, in the middle of no where and he just happened to know how to get rid of the hell hounds."

"Him were shifty character. Him with hims pockets full o sheeps."

"I think he put those hell hounds in the way to chase us off the road, but I don't think he meant to hurt us. I think he thought we'd run. He showed up just when the dogs knocked me down and bit me."

Quaraun reached down, pulling his skirts up and rubbed his wounded leg. The deep punctures from the bite were still seeping blood.

"He didn't expect me to get hurt. I don't think he would have shown up, except the dogs bit me and he was scared I'd be killed so he had to come out into the open to make the dogs go away. He used magic to poof them back to the hell dimension they popped out of, but how did he know where t send them? It would have taken even an advanced wizard weeks to figure out which hell dimension those dogs came from and then more time to find the right spell to send them back, but he knew immediately where they came from and the proper spell to send them back. He had to have been the one who sent them after us."

"But why would he do that?" ZooLock asked. "He seemed like a nice chap."

"He is," Quaraun answered. "For a half-Elf. He helped us before. A few years ago. But he was using a different name back then. He was calling himself Glinter when we first met him."

Quaraun stared up at the tall pine trees towering over head.

"Some thing's not right with GhoulSpawn. Nor any of this. Why would he be doing this?" 

Quaraun had begun muttering to himself under his breath about Hell Hounds and GhoulSpawn and was no longer watching where he was going. Unicorn was nearly blind, though pretending not to be, thus he walked inches from Quaraun, keeping the Elf in sight so as not to walk into any trees.

"Why we stop?"

"There is no more path!" Quaraun pouted.

"Oh! That fixable," Unicorn said cheerfully, pulling out his machete.

"How is that fixable?"

Before Quaraun had time to ponder the possibilities any further, Unicorn ran charging forward, while screaming at the top of his lungs. 

"Murder! Death! Destruction! Santa's floating dead body! Yes! Yes! Yes! Woo, ho, ho, ho! Hahaha! Kill every one! Die! Die! Die!"

Quaraun stood motionless watching Unicorn run around like a raving lunatic, screaming and yelling and shrieking, while brandishing a machete and chopping up the over growth. Knowing the Phooka was blind and and couldn't see where he was swinging that weapon, terrified Quaraun as he watched the Faerie hack every thing in his path to nothingness. ZooLock cowered behind the Elf, knowing it was the only safe place to hide as the Phooka would never hurt Quaraun. After a few minutes, the feral Faerie had cleared a path through the brambles. Unicorn trotted back up to Quaraun.

"See? All fixed."

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

"What?"

"You just massaquered those poor plants."

"They is plants Quaraun. One can no massaqure plants."

"Plants are living beings."

"I a Phooka."

"I'm an Elf."

"So?" 

"I'm suppose to protect plants!"

"Ah yeah. Forgot, yis a butterfly kissing, treeing hugging looney."

"Those poor plants!"

"Theys plants, Quaraun."

"Those poor babies!"

"Babies?"

Quaraun Rushed forward to examine the slashed shrubbery, dragging ZooLock behind him as he went.

"No concern for that life, eh?" Unicorn pointed to the Thullid being dragging in chains behind the Elf.

Quaraun was suddenly on his knees hugging the chopped up bits of plants.

"They're all dead!"

"Aye."

"Why did you do that?"

"I is dead warrior king. It in me blood."

"Oh. Uhm. Okay."

Quaraun wasn't sure he understood what the old Faerie was implying, but he decided it best to just agree with the Phooka and hope something made sense.

ZooLock staggered to his feet, hoping Quaraun wouldn't run off without warning, knocking him off his feet and dragging him on the ground again.

"I suggest," the squid said. "We stop and eat while we are stopped already."

"I shall cook dinner, then," Unicorn stated.

"Are you sure you can handle dinner?" Quaraun asked.

"I master chef," Unicorn declared. "What for ya t'inks I can no handle dinner?"

"We have no food for you to cook."

"Ya always has food in ya bag of holding there."

"It only holds stuff infinatly, it doesn't stop it from spoiling. I can't keep more then a few days worth of food at a time in it. You know that. We are nearly out of food."

"Ah! Then it good t'ing we in swamp."

"Why is that a good thing?"

"Swamp is full of wild edibles."

"I don't eat roughage."

"Roughage?"



Hamsa
Eye of The Grigoi
Eye of the Watchers
Eye of God
Hand of God
Eye of Protection
Evil Eye
Gypsy Curse


"Do you really expect me to eat wild plants?"

"What wrong with wild plants? Ya was just loving 'em a minute ago."

"I'm not a Wild Elf! I am civilized. I grew up in a castle. I don't eat stuff off the ground like a common Wood Elf! I do not eat wild stuff! It's savage and barbaric..."

"It been 300 years since ya last lived in a house."

"That doesn't mean I have to act uncivilized!"

"Yis more uncivilized then ya t'inks. Wild Elves act more civil then ya does these days."

"You take that back!"

"Why ya being so hysterical?"

"I'm not being hysterical."

"Yea ya is. Ya been acting like a crazy bitch in heat all week. Getting crazier by the minute."

"I think it's his leg," ZooLock said soothingly. "His ladyship is hurt."

"Stop calling me that," Quaraun snarled.

"Yes, your ladyship," ZooLock said bowing to his knees.

"Well, I is Faerie and we eats wild stuffs all the time, which by yar standards make me to be savage and barbaric."

Quaraun stopped yelling.

"I didn't mean you were savage and barbaric."

"Does ya t'inks I be uncivilized?"

"You're a Faerie."

"T'at no answer me question."

"I don't know how to answer it."

"Because ya do be t'inking I be savage and barbaric and uncivilized and ya does no be wanting to say it to me face."

"That's not... I don't..." Quaraun stammered trying to find the proper words to say. "I don't think of you that way."

"If ya saw some one else acting way I acts ya would t'inks that way of them, though, eh?"

"I... I ... I don't know."

"Yes, ya does."

"Ya would call 'em savage and barbaric and uncivilized. And that mean ya do be t'inking I be savage and barbaric and uncivilized as well."

"I don't."

"Why?"

"I like you."

"And ya does no likes dem? Is that all that make a difference?"

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."

"Does ya t'ink ya did?"

"I don't know. I don't want you mad at me."

"Does ya t'ink I am?"

"I don't know. You get mad so easily."

"I actually dreams of slicing bread instead of people," a metallic voice said.

"Did your machete just talk?" Quaraun asked.

Unicorn pulled out the machete again.

"Aye. It does that some times."

"I was forged in the blood of a thousand enemies," the sword said.

"No ya was nae. I knows causing I mades ya."

"The blood of 400 men would have had enough iron in it to forge a machete of about 1.2-1.6 kg. Quite a decent machete. Plus, burning the exsanguinated bodies to use the carbon for a carbon steel machete, or using less blood with better machete crafting techniques using other parts of the bodies for other bits and pieces of Unicorn's machete, quenching the blade in the blood, mixing the blood with iron..."

"Aye, all sorts of interesting things! Now shuts up."

"Why didn't I know you had a talking sword?"

"I knows nots."

ZooLock creep up close to Quaraun.

"He had an enchanted map didn't he?" The old squid headed priest asked.

"Yes. He did."

"And a cursed dagger."

"That's true."

"Why would it be shocking that he has a talking sword as well?"

"That's a good point."

"BLUEBERRIES!" Unicorn screamed. "Give me a cup."

Quaraun pulled a cup from his bag of holding and gave it to Unicorn.

"A cup full of glorious blueberry mashed alien brains," the Phooka said delightedly as he started picking blueberries from a nearby bush.

"You are not eating my brain," ZooLock said.

"Why not?"

"I need it!"

"There it is again!" Quaraun said, jumping to his feet.

"What?"

"That cat. That same black cat. It's following us." 

Interview With EelKat
On Writing The Quaraun Series






Random Thoughts On Writing Magic &
Wizards In Fantasy Worlds
A BookTube Reading AuthorTube Edition


The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane
Volume 11 of 130
The Summoner of Darkness
Full Chapter Index -
About The Novel:

Volume 11: The Summoner of Darkness

Back from the dead, once again with Unicorn in tow, and now with the Thullid priest ZooLock his prisoner shackled in chains, Quaraun is headed back to The Screaming Unicorn Tavern in Old Orchard Beach, but finds himself cursed with endless bad luck, as one thing after another drops out of the sky in his path.

Highwaymen, hellhounds, a turtle as big as a house, fire breathing butterflies, a train station from the 20th century, and a strange glow-in-the-dark demonic wizard with pockets full of sheep, who sits in a red armchair in poppy field in the 1400s reading 1980s spellbooks books by Gary Gaygax.

Quaraun goes head to head against The Gremlin, a time traveling wizard from the future who refuses to allow the Pink Necromancer back into Old Orchard Beach, where since his last visit, an evil Sorcerer named HellBorne has erected a giant cursed lighthouse known as The Black Tower.

ZooLock however has other plans, and while 4 rival wizards tear up the town in a wizard's duel, the Squid Headed Aliens From Neptune's Moon and their armies of JellyFish worshiping cultists arrive in town to preform a ritual that will unleash an Elder Brain Chaos Demon, known as The Sacred Pink JellyFish on the world. Too bad they didn't know she was already in town.


NOTE: Most of this novel will be available as free to read online.


Please Note: The Quaraun Series Is Rated M18+ and you must be 18 or older to buy it.

Most pages on EelKat.com are about writing Yaoi, and thus probably is NSFW; reader discretion is advised.

Why is the Quaraun Series Rated M18+?


Quaraun is a character I play in Dungeons & Dragons. Like most every other novel in the series, this novel is based off the notes taken from an actual game play session.

The Summoner of Darkness is based off the Dungeons & Dragons Campaign: The Murder of the Seven Points by Erik Yaple.

If you are a Dungeon Master interested in running a game using this story, the game guide used is this one here --->>>






List Of Sample Chapters
Available To Read Online:


Introducing GhoulSpawn



The Cultists and The Coming of The Darkness



EelKat and The Kats of Planet Ptarmagin



The Moon Elves of Ivujivik



A Letter To Home



HellBorne and The Missing Sacrificial Sheep



The Return of ZooLock



Highwaymen 



Another Letter To Home



Hellhounds



The Half-Elf Thief With Pockets Full of Sheep



The Gremlin's Warning



"I am Very Concerned About Blueberries." - Back At The Blueberry Plains of The Screaming Unicorn Inn



A Field of Fire Breathing Butterflies



A Field of Poppies On The Road To Witch Pond



The Road To Witch Pond (Part 2)



Santa's Dead Floating Body



The Pumpkins Are Following Us



A Third Letter To Home



The Abandoned Cathedral



A Piano Fell From The Sky



Worms!



The Glow-In-The-Dark Sun Elf Who Fell From The Sky



GhoulSpawn and Quaraun Trapped With A Phooka



Night Terrors



"Him not hurt. Him just cry baby."



The Pregnant Jelly Fish



The Banshee Sisters: Bean-Nighe and Ben-Neeyah In the Swamp of Death



A Fourth Letter To Home



Stay Wid Us Too Lang, Ya Go Crazy Wid Us



The Black Lighthouse



Strange Nightmares



Pumpkins Again



The River Boat Man-Woman



The Strange Village or I Love The Smell Of Decomposing Bodies In The Morning



Food Fight In a Funeral Home



The Golden Rooster



Shrimp Dinners and Meeting Mallac



A Serial Killer at Large



Corsets, Elves, and Undead Faeries.



Visiting The Scene of Murder #1 With An UnGelded Stallion



Eating Butter, Kicking Babies, and Pickles Up Your Ass



The Sixth Letter To Home



The Fetishes of Phookas



Back At The Tavern and Still No Shrimp



A Tavern Scene Part 1 - "Ever heard of a chastity cage?"



A Tavern Scene Part 2 - Drunk Elves, Shrimp Dinners, and Dungeon Masters From The Future



A Tavern Scene Part 3 - Quaraun, Unicorn, GhoulSpawn, - Time Travel, Chastity Cages, and Whores



He Kills People With Candy (The 7th Letter To Home)



ZooLock Again - Off To Talk to Merchants About Murder #2



Three Days, Three Murders, & Still No Shrimp Dinners



Tumbling Down Stairs With Slutty Elves and Angry Liches



The Missing Children Bean-Nighe and Ben-Neeyah Warned Of



Explosions From The Sea



A Hurricane Hits The Lighthouse



The Blind Phooka



You Always See The Pony?



Murder #4 & Questions About The Black Tower



Pumpkins, Blueberries, and Shrimp



The Thullids Arrive In Town



Investigating Murder #5



ZooLock's Thullid Cultists



Where Are You Hiding That Horse?



Murder #6 - The Red Herring Murder



Murder #6 - The Real Murder



The First Try At Entering Black Tower



The Black Tower's Garden of Death



The Hostess Twinkie Aisle of Biddeford Wal-Mart



Elves In Chandeliers



Aardsvorkus Muddsburge & The Crystal cave of Time and Necromancy



The Train Station



Back At The Tavern



Mallac and The Murder Weapon



Mallac And The Shambling Dead - No Spell Is Ever without A Price



Why is there an elephant in my bed?



"Kcuf! Kcuf! Kcuf! Kcuf! Kcuf! Kcid a kcus! Kcuf!"



Another Night, Another Murder (Murder #7)



HellBorne The Evil, Lord of Black Tower



Elwin



"My first thought was, where would a three year old put your bag of holding?"



The Oozing Plate Of Sugar Cookies Bludgeoned By The Courageous Alien Being Chased By A Bloodthirsty Crazed Celebrity Chef



The Map of The Town



Elwin and The Town Full of Dead Children



Glimmer Monks wear nothing underneath their robes...



Can Unicorns conceal themselves amongst normal horses and pick them off in secret?



The Thullids Are Gathering Around The Golden Rooster



A Bag Full of Pickled Jellyfish



Back At Black Tower



The Bottomless Pit



I'm HellBorne The Evil, Lord of Black Tower, of The Castle of Blood and Death


Necromancers Don't Wear Pink



BoomFuzzy's Evil Army of Blood Thirsty Marshmallow Tutti-Frutti Fuzzy Wuzzy Fluffy Bunnies



The Cult of The Sacred Pink Jelly Fish



The Pregnant Jellyfish and The Murdered Half-Elf



The Wrath of The Pink Necromancer



Darkness Falls



Back To Black Tower Again



The Ptarmagin Kats of Space Dock 13



On Board The VISION-D8



Elwin Again (The End?)









Did You Know?

The Summoner of Darkness is the first time The Gremlin, EelKat, Lyxiana, Bela, and Spriggan (all characters from the original 1978 edition of Friends Are Forever, Volume 1 of The Twighlight Manor Series) make appearances in The Quaraun series.

While most of the Quaraun series is written with Quaraun as the only point of view character, EelKat, the primary point of view character of the Twighlight Manor series, alternates with Quaraun as a point of view character in Summoner of Darkness.

The novel tells 2 stories side by side, with all odd numbered chapters telling Quaraun's version of the story in the 1400s, and all even numbered chapters being written as letters from EelKat in the 1980s to her sister Lynxian.


Answering Reader Questions:
GhoulSpawn's Sheep Explained


Who Is GhoulSpawn?

This is the first time GhoulSpawn appears using the name GhoulSpawn. In previous volumes he was using the name Glinta instead.

In the Twighlight Manor series he is known as The Gremlin.

Quaraun's teenaged lover GhoulSpawn is a "natural born" Sorcerer. He is a half-Elf/half Demon. 

GhoulSpawn's father was an evil Demon who commanded an army of Ghouls. Because of this, he was known simply as "The Ghoul". 

GhoulSpawn's mother was a Sun Elf whom had fallen in love with The Ghoul, but was forbidden by her family to have contact with him. She in turn ran away with her Demon lover, thus causing a war between Elves and Demons.

The Sun Elves tell a story of how their Princess was kidnapped and raped by the Ghoul, thus she gave birth to the Spawn of the Ghoul. Though his mother named him Glinta, she died while he was still very young, and his Elven kin, took to calling him GhoulSpawn as a way to brand him not one of them.

GhoulSpawn is an interdimensional time traveller, because he is unable to remain in any one time, place or dimension long, because he was born in the Hell Dimension, which exists outside of the realm of time and space as we know it. The Ghoul tried to escape the Sun Elves by going to the distant future (1974) and leaving his half-Elf son and the boy's mother there to live among a band of LSD addicted hippie Humans whom drove a 1974 AMC Gremlin.

The Sun-Elves eventually found their missing she-Elf and brought her back to the 1400s where she belonged, but she refused to leave her half-Demon son behind.

After his mother's death, GhoulSpawn was made a servant to his High Elf step-father and full blooded Elf step siblings, all of whom abused him and treated him like a slave. He grew up constantly being told he, because he was only a half-Elf, was unloved and unwanted and should have been killed at birth, resulting in the very low self esteem he has.

Neither Demons nor half-Elves are considered welcomed members of society, both being forced to live in small tribal groups on the outskirts of civilization. Both are often stoned to death or hung if they dare set foot in a city.

GhoulSpawn being both a Demon and a half-Elf is doubly mistreated by the majority of the world's population. He takes to travelling with Quaraun because Quaraun simply accepts GhoulSpawn as he is and is not bothered by being seen in the company of either a Demon or a half-Elf.

There are several instances when people try to bully GhoulSpawn and Quaraun (a high ranking full-blooded aristocratic High Elf) is quick to stand up for him, protecting and defending the half-Elf. Quaraun is often classified by other Elves as "insane" simply because he is willing to be friends with a half-Elf.

GhoulSpawn has a speech impediment which lessens when he is relaxed and grows worse the more nervous or frightened he becomes.

Around calm laid back characters like Quaraun, GhoulSpawn speaks without difficulty. However around domineering, headstrong, or bullying characters such as Unicorn or HellBorne, GhoulSpawn develops a stutter, making it difficult for him the get to the end of a sentence. 

Because he is a Demon, GhoulSpawn was born with natural magical abilities, making him a rare "natural born wizard" or sorcerer.

GhoulSpawn is typical of a Sorcerer in the Quaraun series, in that he has Demon blood, was thus born with a Demon's natural ability to cast magic on some levels, has taking to self-teaching himself how to control the magic powers he was born with, is outcast from society because of his link to Demons, and is generally not well thought of, even though he is not in any way evil, and is in fact the only part of the cast who could be considered anything close to being a Hero.

Being a time traveller, there are times when Quaraun encounteres both GhoulSpawn and his future counterpart Gremlin in the same novel.

This is the first novel in the series to feature multiple versions of GhoulSpawn in a single novel.









This novel was originally written on: 2014 - 2016

This page last updated on: April 17, 2017


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The Quaraun Series On Amazon:

I am wondering why has Amazon moved the Quaraun books to the category "Transgender Romance" and also "Gay Erotica"? The base story is a deeply depressed, suicidal, drug addict Elf who's lover commit suicide and he's trying not to do the same. It's an old Elf in a tavern, monologuing a lot of flashbacks and back story scenes of his youth. These stories are dark, bloody, angsty, full of drug use, murder, rape, Medieval torture, mental/physical/emotional abuse, and references to depression and suicide - no romance in it, unless you count the occasional (and usually brutally violent) rape scenes that show up in nearly every volume - sorry - no clue what Amazon is thinking or why they moved these to Romance and Erotica, but these books are NOT even close to being Romance or Erotica on any level at all. When I published these books I put them in "Dark Fantasy" and "Yaoi". If they show up in any category other then "Dark Fantasy" and "Yaoi", it's because Amazon put them there without my authorization or approval.

~EelKat



Author Interviews
On Writing The Quaraun Series:


Author Interviews
On CosPlaying The Quaraun Characters:


Author Interviews
Reacting To Old Orchard Beach's
White Power Gay Hating Over Reaction Ban
Of The Quaraun Series:


The 4 door white truck continues to sit at the end of my drive way (146 Portland Ave, Old Orchard Beach, Maine) near every night around sunset, reeving it's engine and squealing it's tires, with the driver yelling anti-gay threats and obscenities out the window. He continues to do the same thing at my dad's apartment building (Biddeford Maine) a few times a week, usually in mid to late afternoon time. He continues to follow me to shopping to various stores in various towns throughout the states.

Phrases he yells from the truck include:

"Kill or be killed remember Saco Shaws all transsexuals are alike"

"I keep a gun under the seat of my truck, I'm gonna use it to shoot you in the head, you transvestite freak"

if cars are going by he yells to them: "that thing is Ken's son, look at how's it's dressed; it's insane, it has autism, we can't allow that thing and it's gay cars in our family friend town of Old Orchard Beach"

He often babbles deranged ramblings about something he calls "the gay-pocalypse", raving lunacy about how "all the gays are gathering" on his doorstep. He raves some crazy nonsense about how Armageddon is coming and the war to end all wars will be "the gays against the Christians" and Christians have to be ready to "kill the gays"

My car is the Autism Awareness Car and had 2.5million marbles glued to it (I have Autism - savant - Kanner's syndrome) he claims tat my car "is gay" because of what it looks like. My car has been vandalized several dozen times, including to have the tires slashed 7 times in 6 months.

After dark often around 10PM, he stands at the end of the logging road across the street from me and shoots at my motohome (in February 2014 he shot holes in my neighbour's barn while doing this). I have video footage of 3 of his shootings at me here:  https://youtu.be/NUebzJ9sz9U and here: https://youtu.be/C4dZbgG-Smw

This has gone on since August 2013 now, in addition to all the vandalism, hate crimes, pet beheadings, etc that has happened, including the bomb that blew up our house in 2006.

As you know, that whole time I had not been able to get a plate number on the truck. He as just here again, and I just realized why I could not get a plate number... there are no plates on the truck, either on the front or on the back. However, as he was driving away today... I noticed, there is a plate, stuck up in the back window of the truck, where it can barely be seen, deliberately obscured from view behind a silver tool box.





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By EelKat Wendy C Allen


If life gives you lemons, then you grab life by the balls and say you're taking them too.

Why make lemonade when you can make testicle stew? 

I don't take shit from no one, I stand up to bullies like you.

~EelKat


Don't let a bully pretend they are the victim, their crocodile tears are just a deviant trick they use to hurt you even more, by convincing others to not help you.




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And why 27 books were deleted off Amazon after being banned by The Old Orchard Beach, Maine Town Hall, an American Government organization, on January 4, 2016, for being "Too Gay For The Family Friendly Town of Old Orchard Beach".






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Top 101 Most Viewed Pages Of 2017 So Far
(Out of 9,772 pages)

(January 2017 to June 2017)
(Excluding the Home PageAbout Page, and Site Map Page, which were the top 3)

  1. Medieval Servants: Their jobs and their place in historical fiction.
  2. Amphibious Aliens: The Story of Etiole & The World's Most Haunted Car
  3. On being a handicapped CosPlayer at PortCon Maine 2017
  4. Flamboyant Nipples: The KKK's New Gay Hating Site About Old Orchard Beach
  5. The GoldenEagle: An Auto-biography of the World's Most Haunted Car
  6. How Long is 50,000 Words?
  7. Writing Mute Characters
  8. Autism, Asperger, PTSD, & Mad Cow: What is wrong with Quaraun? (Writing A Clinically Insane Character Accurately)
  9. Writing Dares Random Generator
  10. Stephen King's The Thinner and The Gypsies Of Old Orchard Beach, Maine
  11. The Saco River Curse
  12. Don't put flyers on people's cars...
  13. Our Primary Site Topic Is Small Penis? Reaching #1 on Page 1 of Google.
  14. Why Crude Adult Comedy and Pink Humor Yaoi Is Not Erotica
  15. Quaraun Free To Read Online Complete Chapter Index In Chronological Order
  16. Albino Races - Moon Elves In The Quaraun Series
  17. Help FBI End Anti-Gay White Power Terrorist Attacks of Old Orchard Beach
  18. Autism, Asperger's, And The Danger of The Self-Diagnosis
  19. 600 Pages: Epic Big Super Sized Novels and Why You Should Never Write One
  20. The Jiggler & The G-String Teddy Bears | The Adventures of Quaraun The Insane
  21. Spell Casting Side Effects: Magic In Quaraun's Universe | Author Interview
  22. Necromancy: Fact Vs Fiction; Or How Can You Be A Necromancer In Real Life?
  23. The Dazzling Razzberry aka EelKat's Autism Awareness Car
  24. The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - page 1 (Online Release of Banned Book)
  25. Markiplier Jacksepticeye and Pewdiepie Play Resident Evil 7
  26. What Type of Music Does A Gypsy Listen To? My Top 10 Favorite Bands
  27. World's Most Haunted Car Merchandise
  28. Is It a Novel, a Novella, a Short Story or Something Else?
  29. I Am Not GhoulSpawn | Excerpt From Rose Garden of The Pink Necromancer
  30. BoomFuzzy Chapter 1 (Novel Excerpt - Quaraun The Insane)
  31. Psychedelics In A 'High' High Fantasy World (High Elves Getting High)
  32. World-building In The Quaraun Series: Creating a Fantasy World
  33. City of The Slushies | Chapter 7 | Quaraun The Insane
  34. How to Handle Writing Fantasy-Horror That Features Violence Against Children
  35. How To Write A Stage Play Script Frenzy 2010 Writing Dialogue
  36. Quaraun GhoulSpawn and The Lich Lord's Lover: The Lover's Triangle
  37. An Elf Gone Mad: The Rise of The Pink Necromancer
  38. A Field of Poppies On The Road To Witch Pond | Summoner of Darkness
  39. The Banshee Sisters: Bean-Nighe and Ben-Neeyah In the Swamp of Death
  40. Amphibious Aliens: My health since the stroke and Etiole . . .
  41. Beware of White Men In Gypsy Clothing: Fake Psychic Scams
  42. Online Income: The Reality vs The Fantasy
  43. OtherKin: My 30th Anniversary of Being Transgender
  44. Autism and the Stigmas - Why Can’t You Accept Me As Me?
  45. Old Orchard Beach Hate Crimes
  46. Suicide, Rape, and Abuse In The Quaraun Series
  47. Writing Racist Characters VS The Ku Klux Klan In Old Orchard Beach, Maine
  48. A Gallery of Fetish Shoes
  49. Custom Leggings - Designs By EelKat
  50. EGL: Elegant Gothic Lolita
  51. One Gypsy's Review of My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding
  52. Selfie: When did the X-Rated porn word get a new meaning?
  53. Daily Writing Prompts (June 2017 Archive)
  54. Quaraun The Insane Volume 1: The Night of the Screaming Unicorn
  55. Random Generators by EelKat
  56. Autistic Characters In Fiction
  57. Keywords & Pigeons: How I Do Local Business Marketing
  58. Manuscript Reading Services or Will You Read My Book and Tell Me What You Think?
  59. How to Write Hot Sex - Tips For Erotic Romance Authors
  60. How can your books have gay transvestite characters and not be Erotica?
  61. KBoards, The NaNoWriMo ML Rumor & The Vindictive Stalker
  62. Captured By The Lich Lord | The Night of The Screaming Unicorn
  63. Incest In Fiction
  64. Maine UFO Sightings
  65. Page 11 - The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - The Scottish Traveller Crime Family
  66. The Southern Maine Writers Group
  67. Contact Info
  68. My Fave YouTubers Play: Dream Daddy - The Yaoi Dating Sim Otome Game
  69. Santa's Floating Dead Body | A Scene From The Summoner of Darkness
  70. Why Pink Humor Crude Adult Comedy Yaoi Is Not Erotica
  71. SideBar Archive Spring 2017
  72. The Dungeon Master & The 1974 AMC Gremlin
  73. Ideas, Ideas, Ideas (Where Do You Get Them?)
  74. Lives Destroyed: Amphibious Aliens 10th Anniversary Update
  75. Twighilight Not Twilight
  76. What exactly makes an Elf an Elf? (What is the definition of an Elf?)
  77. EelKat's Guide To NaNoWriMo Featuring The 13 Step Method To Writing
  78. A Motorhome named 'No Hurry' becomes Rosebud & The Story of Ten Kidnapped Cats
  79. BoomFuzzy's Gingerbread House From Hell
  80. An Elf and a Lich in the Gingerbread Pit | The Night of The Screaming Unicorn
  81. Gemstones in Gypsy Magic (A to C)
  82. Is The Quaraun Series Erotica? - No! Here's why...
  83. Pink Flowers Aesthetic on Pinterest
  84. Sheep | GhoulSpawn The Crazed & The Rose Garden of The Pink Necromancer
  85. You Stole My Idea - I was writing a book, but you already wrote it 10 years ago!
  86. A Day At Witch Pond & Fleeing To The Forest | Summoner of Darkness
  87. City of The Slushies | Chapter 1 | Quaraun The Insane
  88. Colour Magic - Gypsy Style
  89. Create Original Content aka I Hate Jackass Gutter Scum Thieves
  90. Lets Playing Is No Longer Fun
  91. Phookas
  92. The Signs Of Old Orchard Beach & The FBI Investigation Of The Town Hall
  93. Aspergers is NOT Autism
  94. Domain Name Branding: Should You Put Your Brand Name In Your URL?
  95. How is it that the church leaders are claiming you do not pay tithes?
  96. Summoner of Darkness: GhoulSpawn and Quaraun Trapped With A Phooka
  97. The Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach - page 2 (Online Release of Banned Book)
  98. Transgender, Transsexual, Transvestite, or Intersex: What Is Quaraun?
  99. Average Typing Speed
  100. How valuable is a writer’s group?
  101. Santa Claus: Lich Of The North Pole (Includes NSFW 18+ CBT Yaoi scene)



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“Karma comes after everyone eventually. You can't get away with screwing people over your whole life, I don't care who you are. What goes around comes around. That's how it works. Sooner or later the universe will serve you the revenge that you deserve.” 

― Jessica Brody


"By autistic standards, the “normal” brain is easily distractible, is obsessively social, and suffers from a deficit of attention to detail and routine. Thus people on the spectrum experience the neurotypical world as relentlessly unpredictable and chaotic, perpetually turned up too loud, and full of people who have little respect for personal space." 

— Steve Silberman


never judge yourself, by the way a hater judges you, you are way better then they say you are, and they know it, that's why they are trying to bring you down to their level ~EelKat


Attempt Something New Today! – too many people talk about doing this or that but few actually take action, it's the why behind why so few succeed and so many fail.


Don't let a bully pretend they are the victim, their crocodile tears are just a deviant trick they use to hurt you even more, by convincing others to not help you.



Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and you can sell him fishing gear for the rest of his life. 





Be the hero, not the bully.



Sheeeeeeep!

Fabulous and flamboyant...

who knew?




“If you're horrible to me, I'm going to write a song about it, and you won't like it. That's how I operate.” 

― Taylor Swift


Bullies should never force you to  suffer in silence. If someone has hurt you, let others know.



“One's dignity may be assaulted, vandalized and cruelly mocked, but it can never be taken away unless it is surrendered.” 
― Michael J. Fox



“I would rather be a little nobody, then to be a evil somebody.” 

― Abraham Lincoln


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“When people see you're happy doing what you're doing, it sort of takes the power away from them to tease you about it.” 

― Wendy Mass, Every Soul a Star





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“1. Bullying is not okay. Period.

2. Freedom of religion does not give you the right to physically or verbally assault people.

3. If your sincerely-held religious beliefs require you to bully children, then your beliefs are fucked up.” 

― Jim C. Hines