SpaceDock 13 is now EelKat.com

EelKat Wendy Christine Allen
Author, Artist, & Art Car Designer
 

How to say my name?

Eel + Cat = EelKat












Hoodoo, Rootwork, Etc


By EelKat Wendy C Allen

Services Offered

Altar Work

Blessings & Cleansings

Candle Spells

Card Reading

Career Spells

Clootie Spells

Crystal Scrying

Dream Interpretations

Door Opening Spells

Evil Eye Hexes

Genie Bottle Spell (A type of exorcism, NOT a magic lamp for granting wishes)

Gris-Gris

Graveyard Work

Honey Jar spells

House Cleansing

HotFooting

JuJu spells

Lithomancy 

Love Spells

Mirror Box Spells

Mojo Bags

Money Spells

Necromancy

Personal Power Mastery

Pendulum Divination

Rootwork Spell Casting

Shell Divination

Spirit Communication (see Necromancy)

Uncrossing

Voodoo Dolls

Wanga spells

Working at the Crossroads


Services Done Only RARELY

The following is a list of services I am trained in and do on rare occasions, if you can prove such a spell is absolutely necessary. 


Exorcism

(Haunted Houses or Inanimate Object)


Most cases of supposed demon possession (haunted houses, and other objects) are not actual possession.

If you have a haunted house or other "cursed" object, most likely you are dealing with a ghost, a polter sprite, or a di-jinn.

A ghost is the spirit of a person who died, but for whatever reason has not yet moved on to the spirit world and continues to roam in the places where they lived in life. Helping them realize they are dead and can safely move on, is what is needed. You want spirit communication, not exorcism in these cases.

Polter Sprites are spirits (often Faeries, Pixies, or Di-Jinn) who lay claim to an object and violently chase away human intruders. An exchange must be made. Give them a new object to own and they will go away. You want a Clootie Spell or a Genie Bottle Spell not an exorcism in these cases.

Di-Jinn are more difficult to get rid of and require an exorcism of sorts. A di-jinn is a spirit that was called up (often via a poorly cast spell, a misused ouija board, a sanace done for "fun", etc,) and is now trapped in the world of the living. They are desperately trying to return to the spirit world are not intentionally causing harm. They need a doorway to the spirit world to be opened for them so that they can return to their home. You need a door opening or portal spell and not an exorcism in order to get rid of a Di-Jinn.

For a case of actual possession by an evil spirit or demon, a exorcism is required, but the chances of your home or object actually being possessed by a demonic presence is highly unlikely. An exorcism should only be done after the first three options mentioned above have been tried (and failed).

I WILL NOT do an exorcism until after all three of the other options have been done first, and it is unlikely that I will do an exorcism at all.

I do not perform exorcisms on living beings (humans or animals) see info below, the the Services Not Offered section, for why.


NOTE: Polter Sprites are NOT Poltergeists.

A Poltergeist is the mental projection of a very angry person. It is fear manifested physically. Most often by a child or young adult who is being abused by an adult close to them.

If you have a Poltergeist in your house, this usually means that a child in your household is being abused by an adult in your household.

You will want to contact social services, not an exorcist, if you are dealing with an ACTUAL Poltergeist.


The Mirror Box Death Wanga

(The Gypsy Death Spell)


Death Spells are rare and expensive (minimum fee is $5,000). They take a month or more to cast and require a LARGE (1/2 acre) dedicated area to erect signs to petition the Grigori.

Special note, I never cast them on a SPECIFIC PERSON, but rather send a petition to the Grigori Angels. The Grigori know who committed the crime and will punish the correct person. If a rare case comes where I do take your case, do not send me any names of anyone involved, other than the victim. If you send me the names of the criminal(s) or suspected criminal(s) I WILL NOT take your case. The focus of the spell is to protect the victim, by calling upon the help of the Destroying Angels who laid waste to Sodom and Gomorrha. They see all and know all. They know who hurt your loved one and WILL punish the CORRECT person.

Wangas (Death Spells) are ONLY cast in cases of extreme harm having been done and the court system not enacting justice by allowing the criminal to go free so they can hurt another.

This spell is reserved ONLY for murder, attempted murder, rape, animal abuse, child abuse, and perpetrators of violent hate crimes. This is a massive large scale protection spell that prevents a criminal from ever harming anyone again.


Services NOT Offered

There is a lot of Hoodoo work I don't do for one reason or another, usually because I'm not trained in that discipline.

I know this may be hard for you to understand, but there's no way around it: if I am not trained to do a thing, I simply can not do it.

Sorry, but just because I know how to read Angel Cards doesn't mean I know how to read Tarot cards. Please don't order an Angel Card Reading from me and add a message asking: "I know this listing is for Angel Cards, but could you give me a Tarot reading instead?" (yes, people do do this.) No, no, i can not give you a tarot reading. Why? well, for one thing I do not own a single Tarot deck. For another thing it takes years to learn to read Tarot cards and I've never even seen a Tarot card and don't know the first thing about them. Maybe someday I'll take lessons, but until that day, I'm sorry, I simply do not know how to read Tarot cards and can not offer a service for something I don't know how to do.

There are thousands of methods of divination out there and just because a person is trained in one method, does not mean they are trained in any other method. 

Yes, I have studied a wide variety of divination methods and offer services in those areas. 

No, I am not a jack-of-all trades trained in every area of divination and spell work. There are a lot of disciplines I have no training in and simply can not offer services for.

Those things include the following:


Astrology

Astromancy

Break-Up (A Couple/Marriage) Spells

Ceromancy

Cheiromancy

Chirology

Coffee Ground Reading

Doodlebugging

Dowsing

Gematria

Geomancy

Face Reading

Fortune Telling

Hand Analysis

Hand-Reading

Horoscopes

I Ching

Lottery Numbers

Lucky Numbers

Notarikon

Numerology

Palmistry

Palm-Reading

Phrenology

Physiognomancy

Predicting The Future

Psychic Cup Reading

Psychic Prediction 

Tarot Readings

Tasseomancy

Tea Leaf Reading

Telepathic Suggestion

Water Witching

Wax Reading

Zodiac Charts


Yes, everything on that list is something, that someone, somewhere along the line, has asked me to do for them. In most cases, I had never heard of the term until they mentioned it and had to do a Google search to find out what they were asking me to do. I will continue to add to this list over time, as people ask me to do services I don't do and have never heard of.

:)


Because I am trained in exorcism, I often receive requests to cast demons or evil spirits out of children. I will not accept any cases requesting an exorcism to be performed on a living being.

NO! I WILL NOT perform an exorcism on your child.

NO! I WILL NOT perform an exorcism on your pet.

NO! I WILL NOT perform an exorcism on your spouse.

NO! I WILL NOT perform an exorcism on your friend.

NO! I WILL NOT perform an exorcism on you.

Here's why:


Exorcism

(Living Being)

Exorcisms are unessaracy. There is no actual case of a demon possessed person on record, all instances of supposed demon possession have been medical proven to be a physical or mental illness that goes away with proper treatment.

Most instances of supposed demon possession are simply a mentally ill person who has stopped taking their meds and is in need of medical treatment, not an exorcism.

Demons CAN NOT take possession of a person. The only way for a demon to enter a body, is for that body to be dead. Because of this, I NEVER perform an exorcism on a person or pet.

If your friend, family member, pet, or loved one is behaving strangely, chances are very high that they are having a seizure and require immediate medical attention NOT an exorcist. Please get them to a doctor immediately.

If your FIRST RESPONSE is to call an exorcist instead of an ambulance, then changes are VERY high that you yourself suffer from a mental disorder and need more help then your loved one does.

Please do not subject your loved one to the horrors of your own insanity. By refusing to take your loved one to the hospital, you are simply abusing them and making their health worse than it already is. Do the right thing and get them to the hospital, then get yourself to a psychiatrist to find out why you are convinced demons live in your loved one. Your loved one needs a doctor and so do you.

I will ONLY exorcise inanimate object such as houses, cars, jewelry, books, etc. See above for more details.


More Info

About Me

FAQs

About Laughing Gnome Hollow

About The Church of The Holy Rhinestone

Prices & Scheduling

Complete Listing of Spells, Curses, and other Hoodoo 

Card Reading

Necromancy

Disclaimers, Code of ethics, and all That Other legal Stuff I'm Required To Tell You

Basic Layman's Version: Disclaimers

Basic Layman's Version: Code of Ethics

Full Text Version (70,000 words long - 150+ pages-, written by help of a lawyer and contains lots of words and phrases the average lay person can not understand.)

More answers to frequently asked questions

There are 700+ more questions sent to me by readers, answered on this site. Most of the pages are not indexed yet, but I'm working on that between other stuff, so eventually the index will be finished. 

The Index of FAQs

















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Below is a list of the ACTUAL, REAL, OFFICIAL online accounts owned and managed by me:

on Amazon:  ► http://www.amazon.com/author/eelkat

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Looking for the Quaraun books? The original Unicorn Porn #Yaoi short stories are no longer available, but are currently being compiled in chronological order and republished as novels. The new Kindle novel editions can be found here:   http://tinyurl.com/Quaraun 

Interviews about the Quaraun series: 

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Hugs and kisses to my wonderful fans. Love you all! Talk to you again soon.  

If it ain't on this list, it's probably fake.

~EK 

Throughout 2013 - 2015 a slew of FAKE "EelKat" accounts surfaced, both on social networks and on forums.

NOTE: I was very active on forums from 1997 to 2007 and have RARELY used a forum since then. Other then the Warriors Forum and Absolute Write I have not posted on ANY forums AT ALL since 2012.

Note: My old inactive forum accounts were hacked and "resurrected" in 2013/2014/2015 by a psychotic NaNoWriMo ML who is upset over my having won a total of 27 writing contests/challenges and published 130+ novels since 2004 and and apparently (according to her emails) she has yet to win or publish anything.

If you see "me" posting on a forum at any point after 2012, know that it is likely this mysterious, and still yet unidentified "Kendra Silvermander".

More information about Kendra Silvermander and what she did can be found here.

➽ ➽ ➽ If you have any information regarding the identity of the stalker/attacker/driver of the 4-door white pick-up truck please contact Officer Tim DeLuca of the Old Orchard Beach Police Department @ 207-934-4911 and/or Agent Andy Drewer of the Portland FBI @ 207-774-9322 ◀️ ◀️ ◀️ ☎️

Please help the police and FBI put this brutal, violent, psychotically deranged stalker in prison.

Need Directions?

Rather then ask the crazy gun-toting neighbours, and risk get shot by the psychotically deranged, white power gay haters that live up and down my street, patrolling obsessively by my driveway every 15 minutes in a 4 door white pick-up truck, just get directions from Google Maps. Here, you can find 146 Portland Avenue, Old Orchard Beach, ME right here:


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And, in case you missed the notice at the top and felt the need to make a fool of yourself in my inbox, here's the notice again, longer this time.

We Gypsies of Old Orchard Beach, Maine, are Scottish & this site therefore uses our Native Scottish English. We are no Americans, so please do no expect to find American English here.

For example spellings like "travelling" or "colour", pronoun differences "me" for "my" or "you" for "your" might look unfamiliar to you. They are in fact correct in our language. 

Yes, I do receive you many emails pointing out what you believe to be typos and spelling errors. No, I do no respond to your American arrogance in thinking nothing other then the American language exists or your ignorance to the existence of languages other then you own. You do have a brain; I highly recommend you try using it. You might find you actually enjoy it.

I does no ask of you to speak to me in me own language, so do no ask of me to speak to you in yous language, for just as you does no know me language existed, I do no know how to use you language, though, I did have enough brain to know it existed and not berate you for using you own native tongue. I can'na say as much for thems that thought to bitch at me in emails.